MLB Offseason N/V- Rum, Sodomy, and Living in the Minor Leagues

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > MLB Offseason N/V- Rum, Sodomy, and Living in the Minor Leagues

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Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

I'm so happy. I don't want tonight to end.

# ¿ Nov 3, 2016 07:56

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 15:48

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Sydin posted:

I'm too drunk to look for the source but IIRC somebody mentioned in the GDT that this series from a statistical standpoint was the most evenly matched in history. Game 7 was a down and out slugfest between the best two teams in baseball in 2016, and the Cubs came out on top by a hair. It doesn't get better than that.

I'll drink to that. It was a hell of a series, Cleveland. Hope you get yours soon and also lose the racist thing with your team.

# ¿ Nov 3, 2016 08:11

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

CubsWoo posted:

I think I need a new avatar too and I figure at this point what better than a gif of Rizzo or somebody from Cubshine and Lollipops

or maybe Pear Baby

You absolutely should do Pear Baby

Following up on my donation, $20 to the ALS Association for every Cubs dong in the series:

# ¿ Nov 3, 2016 08:25

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

beejay posted:

Nothing's going to get me down today. Although I 100% seriously had dreams that the earth was disintegrating last night.

It's going to take a collapsed star to bring me down today.

RC Cola posted:

Hot take. Montgomery rules

Yeah, I realized how much my view of him changed when I was calling for him to come in instead of Chapman.

# ¿ Nov 3, 2016 16:05

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

chilihead posted:

Theo Epstein for president!

We KNOW he can make America great again!

Does that mean he would tear down and rebuild the whole farm system? :v:

# ¿ Nov 3, 2016 17:25

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

ruddiger posted:

https://twitter.com/POTUS/status/794057504871346176

This is pretty loving cool, but I hope Obama wears his Sox jersey when they visit.

I absolutely would love it if he pulled some goofy poo poo like that.

# ¿ Nov 3, 2016 17:36

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Grant Brisbee wrote an article. It's pretty good.

# ¿ Nov 3, 2016 19:12

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Niwrad posted:

How does SB Nation have such disparity in quality among their blogs?

I think it's because they originated as individual blogs and then they were consolidated under a unified banner. They don't bother trying to enforce any real level of quality. Hell, even the rules of conduct on different blogs vary greatly.

# ¿ Nov 3, 2016 20:28

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Somebody should also get a happy Bill Murray avatar

# ¿ Nov 4, 2016 06:25

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

I'm Matt Szczur staring blankly at the camera

# ¿ Nov 4, 2016 19:25

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

MichiganCubbie posted:

Omg for a second I thought Rizzo was going to throw it into the crowd.

I thought he was going to ceremoniously hand it over to Montgomery.

# ¿ Nov 4, 2016 19:36

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Chexoid posted:

I know all fan bases are in their own way terrible but it seems like no one whines like Cardinals people.

https://twitter.com/BestFansStLouis/status/794661381719097345

loving

Yeah, pure dollars are the best measure of "earning" your wins.

He's on point about the Eddie Vedder song, though. Of course, I hate everything he's associated with that's not the Cubs.

# ¿ Nov 5, 2016 00:26

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Timby posted:

Cubs had the seventh-highest payroll in the league in 2007 and lost 96 games.

I don't think you have the right year

# ¿ Nov 5, 2016 01:34

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Ammat The Ankh posted:

• Signing Andrew Miller to be closer

You know he's not a free agent, right?

# ¿ Nov 6, 2016 00:42

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Ammat The Ankh posted:

Also I signed 4 different guys to be closer

From everything I heard about Casilla et al this year, I'm definitely not holding it against you.

# ¿ Nov 6, 2016 02:43

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Nail Rat posted:

Call me naive but I for some reason believe Theo when he says they didn't want to exercise the option just to trade him and wanted to let him explore the market if he wasn't in their plans.

This and it seems like the front office will be a minor dick once, but not twice. Like Dex getting a QO last year and not this one. Hammel being traded midseason once but not kept around to do the exact same thing again.

# ¿ Nov 7, 2016 01:19

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

CubsWoo posted:

Dexter Fowler (31) (4.2 WAR)
Sam Fuld (35) (DNP 2016)

gently caress me, how did little Sam Fuld get that old? He's perpetually 25 in my head.

# ¿ Nov 7, 2016 18:50

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Nail Rat posted:

The Cubs are probably thinking of trying Montgomery out as a fifth starter unless a prospect breaks through during the season. Montgomery is under team control for the next 5 seasons yet.

I bet Zaz also gets a chance to show what he's worth as a starter during spring training, with ties going to Montgomery.

# ¿ Nov 7, 2016 21:04

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

On the topic of not free agency, isn't this supposed to be the offseason the Wrigley bullpens are moved under the bleachers?

I just found myself thinking about it and couldn't dig up anything more recent than last year.

# ¿ Nov 7, 2016 21:59

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

tadashi posted:

The camera is zooming in and from a weird angle. It makes it looks like the ball curves when it's just staying on it's path and spinning. It never comes anywhere near the relievers.

If you watch the actual video, you see the ball either hit Travis Wood's leg or the chair leg behind his pants.

# ¿ Nov 8, 2016 15:24

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Poque posted:

I have been loving warning you people for years.

This goes excellent with Javy pointing right at us.

# ¿ Nov 9, 2016 17:55

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

I miss baseball and wish it would come back already. Regular season, not postseason. I don't need higher blood pressure right now.

# ¿ Nov 9, 2016 21:58

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

ScottyJSno posted:

N: Twitter reports

A MLB agent tells @CSNMooney that free agent reliever Aroldis Chapman is seeking a $100 million contract.

Yeah or no?

Cubs fans?

gently caress that!

Miz Kriss posted:

Wait... Lackey's gone?

He's saying goodbye for the offseason. He and Jake live in Austin during the off months.

# ¿ Nov 10, 2016 02:44

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Niwrad posted:

Does this mean Dex will be back? Or just cutting payroll?

Probably they view bullpens as a bad place to spend notable money since they're so volatile.

# ¿ Nov 10, 2016 05:27

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

tadashi posted:

Did anyone else have images of 1998 Rod Beck dancing through their head during Chapman's innings in Game 7?

I pretty much only think of him when playing the Giants.

# ¿ Nov 10, 2016 16:36

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Apparently Go Cubs Go made it onto the Billboard charts. More importantly, Northwestern and Illinois did a marching band version.

e: revised because I didn't bother reading everything

Explosionface fucked around with this message at 17:28 on Nov 10, 2016

# ¿ Nov 10, 2016 17:22

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Kevlar v2.0 posted:

Illinois did too!

I hope Go Cubs Go becomes as hated by fans of opposing teams as Chelsea Dagger

That'll teach me to not read everything! To be honest, I think everyone already hates it. I even hate it a bit right now because it hasn't left my head since game 7.

# ¿ Nov 10, 2016 17:29

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Thom P. Tiers posted:

I want the Cardinals to trade for Ryan Braun but I know they won't.

I can't say I'm purely against it because it lets me direct all my hate at one team, but at the same time I don't like a career Cub killer heading to the Cards.

# ¿ Nov 10, 2016 18:34

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Are the Braves trying to make the oldest rotation, then?

# ¿ Nov 11, 2016 16:29

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

ego symphonic posted:

Pepsi products are unwelcome in Atlanta.

Dr. Pepper is independent

# ¿ Nov 11, 2016 17:33

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Spoeank posted:

Shohei Otani is a loving goddamn monster human being what the hell

https://gfycat.com/AbleOrganicAnchovy

And that's why you play baseball outdoors like god intended. :colbert:

I wonder if they'll manage to break him before he gets posted if/when that ever happens.

# ¿ Nov 14, 2016 07:05

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Nissin Cup Nudist posted:

17.2 m for Hellickson then. What determines the salary of QOs because 17.2 seems like way too much?

It's related to average salaries across the league or something.

e: vv There's a more informed answer vv

# ¿ Nov 14, 2016 21:22

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

I'm sad Kyle didn't get the Cy Young, but what's really throwing me is how incredibly wide the gap was between Scherzer and everyone else.

# ¿ Nov 17, 2016 00:33

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

KB wins NL MVP, surprising pretty much nobody. :toot:

# ¿ Nov 18, 2016 00:48

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

bad boy in the boy band posted:

Id rather still have him. I think we could have gotten another reliever and won the WS and still kept that guy. We're going to hate that move for the next 20 years.

The Cubs won the World Series for the first time in over a century. All moves justified.

# ¿ Nov 21, 2016 22:15

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

bawfuls posted:

In case anyone wasn't sure, the Padres are still run by a bunch of braindead imbeciles.

https://twitter.com/Padres/status/801157050793213952

Those are the most boring unis possible.

# ¿ Nov 22, 2016 23:55

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

beejay posted:

This is the truth. This year I have experienced family tragedy, job uncertainty, and the loss of many beloved musical figures, and of course this election, yet the Cubs won. Such a weird loving year.

It makes a strange poetic sense that the Cubs could only win in the darkest timeline.

# ¿ Nov 23, 2016 16:22

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Sydin posted:

https://twitter.com/giantsprospects/status/801170561137160193

I mean he did have one really good season with the Cubs in 2014 before becoming complete garbage, so who knows!

Yeah, poor guy never seemed to recover from his shoulder(?) injury very well. Which sucked, because I really liked him.

# ¿ Nov 23, 2016 18:50

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

Your Taint posted:

It just sucks I have to hate him now. Dex is a good guy who sold his soul to the devil.

You don't have to hate him. He can just be someone whose team you want to see losing often.

# ¿ Dec 9, 2016 15:01

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 15:48

Explosionface: May 30, 2011; We can dance if we want to,
we can leave Marle behind.
'Cause your fiends don't dance,
and if they don't dance,
they'll get a Robo Fist of mine.

bawfuls posted:

Do people really think there's that large a gulf between Chapman and Jansen? Over the last 4 years their results are remarkably similar. Chapman has a slightly higher K rate but Jansen has half the walk rate. I'd argue Jansen shows more signs of durability than Chapman and is more likely to retain effectiveness if he loses some velocity since Jansen's command is better, but that's speculation.

Yeah, if it were my money (and ignoring off field issues) for longer than one or two years, I would opt for Jansen myself.

# ¿ Dec 12, 2016 20:26

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > MLB Offseason N/V- Rum, Sodomy, and Living in the Minor Leagues

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