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It's not easy finding mascara that doesn't bleed. Last April when I found myself in an overnight downpour, my humble form clinging to the top of an otherwise open garbage can in hopes of preventing nearby woodland critters from accessing the bounty inside, I looked more like one of the raccoons rabidly scratching at the bin than a glamour model! But thanks to covergirl, I can keep your trash safe *turns to the camera* and keep my raccoon eyes lookin fierce. A raccoon is on the screen and a human voice says oh shucks but you think it's the raccoon fade to black. |
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Nov 7, 2016 16:33
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| # ? Apr 19, 2024 21:06 |
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*Sighs loudly* sometimes it feels impossible to attract the eyes of that certain someone when my lip colour isn't on fleek or looking fly or smizing or other things. But thanks to covergirl, we can crank our brightness, to an 11 *model turns up big dial to an 11*! A luscious shade of ruby red is the perfect eye catcher and a great contrast to an LG stainless steel. Just apply liberally before clinging to the top of the tupperware housing last night's chow mein leftovers and the next time that special someone opens the fridge for seconds, you'll have the look that will leave them begging for thirds. |
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Nov 7, 2016 16:38
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btw this is going to be real stupid so strap in |
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Nov 7, 2016 16:38
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Plato once probably said that one can "look so good, they could get away with murder". Thanks to Covergirl's new QT from Toe2Tip line of vibrant new nail polishes, you'll never have to plead guilty to changes of Boo Boo drab nails again! *the weather network them plays in the background while the model applies a cool pink I guess to her finger nails before a pair of policeman restrain her arms and lead her into an interrogation room*. Policeman: *slams the table* WHAT DO YOU KNOW? Model: Not much, *waves the back of her hand* except that I've never known my nails looked so dang good. Policeman: *blushes and coughs* what a vibrant shade of pink Model: *turns to the camera and winks* Thanks Covergirl. Now you too can go out and get nails so sexy, nobody will care where Amanda was on November 14th between 5-8PM. |
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Nov 7, 2016 16:44
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*commercials starts with two city workers prying a covergirl off of a sewer manhole entrance, she flips in the air and lands on the street looking at the camera and you notice dang not much special going on with her make up in this shot* Model: ever feel like you've got a face that should just stay underground? *she notions to the open sewer entrance and a trumpet plays sad notes; the audience at home kinda does feel this sometimes* Model: well let's change all that with Covergirl's new line of Ain't-No-Clown-Can't-Get-Me-Down Face Shellac. *montage of model using a wide janitor broom to apply glaze coating liberally to own face, she looks increasingly shiny and I guess beautiful by extension. I can see the camera man in the reflect, he's wearing cargo shorts* *A new day, the same two city workers approach the covergirl who is firmly fit into the sewer entrance again. One of them lifts up the crowbar about to jam it down when the other stops him* "Whoah what are you doing?!" *he blushes and offers his hand down to her, she takes it and he lifts her up and then carries her princess style, she turns and winks to the camera* Model: "Thanks Covergirl. I used to think my looks were circling the drain *she notions to the sewer entrance and you laugh*, but now--", the city worker who wow he is such a hunk you didn't notice til now interrupts, "--you're the poo poo" he smiles wow what a smile |
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Nov 7, 2016 16:53
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I am sorry |
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Nov 7, 2016 16:57
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this thread is beautiful 
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Nov 7, 2016 17:24
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New from covergirl, it's Manufactgirl, our new foundation product that's going to change the game in permanent makeup. Applying Manufactgirl is a one time process and you can achieve snappy looks with tones like Blue, Black, Bronze, Charcoal, Gold, Green and Purple. It all starts with building a natural oxide layer that exists on the surface of your face. Begin with a cleansing caustic soda rinse to degrease your face. Then apply our natural sulfuric acid and tea leaf face balm. Check your oxide chart for how long to keep your balm on to determine the underlying oxide layer. The various colors are made simply by controlling the thickness of the oxide layer produced (0.02 a sassy bronze blue to 0.36 microns a deep and mysterious green). Remember your new tones are susceptible to scratching! It's time to make a break from tradition with new Manufactgirl
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Nov 7, 2016 18:05
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Me: hey bae, check my new extreme glitter eye shadow! Bae: 
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Nov 7, 2016 19:59
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The camera pans over a beautiful meadow, wait a second, what's that beautiful tune in the background. Holy moley, you say to yourself, it's Jame's Blunts's song You're Beautiful. Wow nice cymbals and guitar in this song wow wait a moment, that's not Jamess Blunts's beautiful voice or his heinous friggin nose, that's a beautiful strong probably independent woman playing the song and singing it her own way. She turns to you, the camera man and she says with her mouth, "You don't have to always been an original" she laughs like a good laugh you like you like a lot. She winks too, gazoonga am i right boiz haha i'm right. "All thanks to Covergirl's exciting NewSkin technology" she pulls out what looks like a floppy skin coloured disc, slowly working it onto her face the contours of the fake skin becoming her contours and oh my god, the image comes into focus and her face looks just like jamus bluntss's, she goes back to singing the song and wow what a great version of it she made or he made who is this anymore. James Blunts' smirks and she says, "Maybe I'm born with it, or maybe it's a nanopolymer skin or maybe it's actually jame's blunts real skin have you seen him lately? Me neither, or maybe it's covergirl" |
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Nov 7, 2016 20:18
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The camera smoothly navigates a garden of hanging silk, emerging from the other side to find a luxurious bed centred in the middle of an endless white void. Decorative pillows, a fancy bed skirt knit or weaved or however they make em, 5 post bed (don't ask) and the princess curtains or whatever they are called from the top. On the bed, a beautiful model stretches out on her back, covering nearly the entire bed surface with her reach, she lifts her head to the camera, "I used to think my face just looked like yesterday's laundry" an audible womp womp pierces the quiet classical music in the background, "...but thanks to Covergirl's new Button-my-butt-off technology, I can feel like a real girl!" The camera hard zooms in on her perfect rosy cheeks. Wait a second, those rosy cheeks have small holes in them, heck, they look just like buttons. An inset secret of a cartoon depicting the sewing surgery animates in the corner, "It's as easy as 1-2-3 and heck, now I never have to apply blush in the morning, you get me ladies" She lolls her head knowingly to the left, where more women might be sitting she guesses. A pack of 5 attractive and cool men come in, one of them extinguishing his cigarette and although you don't normally like that, he seems like he is nice and has a heart full of love and plaque. The men all walk up to the bed and, one at a time, lift up the woman and all crawl in, lined up underneath her back, tucking themselves in beneath her as she remains stretched out on her back, used as a blanket. The coolest man speaks, "Wow, this is comfy" his friends grunt in agreement. The lights dim and the camera zooms into that perfect blushing face again, the model whispers, "Thanks Covergirl, you took me from a throw, to a total keep" she winks and the starwipe commences |
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Nov 7, 2016 20:30
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| # ? Apr 19, 2024 21:06 |
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alright i think that's all i got jah bless |
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Nov 7, 2016 21:06
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