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Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016
gluuu

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Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016
We have been given a chance to build a new society

Can we please not do the tax :(

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

The Titanic posted:

So since everybody is hell bent on the crappy FPS game, how is the actual space ship stuff since the update? Do the space ships fly like they have weight and mass and velocity, and turn based on the pretend placement of the magic thrusters? Or do they still turn like no clip characters in a zero gravity level?

I know, I know... what does my heart tell me?

I'm a video game idiot. What's no-clip?

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016
Someone post the Star Marine logo that looks like the cover of a choose-your-own-adventure book

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016
Confession: I've never played Doom :sweatdrop: (the first shooter I played was Goldeneye)

I thought the red cartridge was neat though :shrug:

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Atheist Sunglasses posted:

just now realizing that for some people, the first time they played Doom was on a N64, and that makes me sad and dead

I STILL have never played any iteration of Doom


That's the poo poo right there. The other one I remember was different was Killer Instinct Gold, which was a black cartridge (NTSC also)
e: and I guess the gold Zelda too

Harold Stassen fucked around with this message at 04:54 on Dec 3, 2016

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Scruffpuff posted:

Instead of actually modelling flight physics (mass of ship, power of thrusters, direction of thrust and the resulting acceleration and velocity etc.) they're actually doing it in reverse.
[...]
It's actually rather clever, because it needs basically 0 CPU power to do it this way, instead of complex physics calculations.

So the final product will use even more processing power, assuming they ever stop cheating. This is probably another one of the absolutely giant obstacles they're facing, and once again they don't have the acumen to pull it off.

Wrecked Angle posted:

The bit people say can't be done is the 100 star systems with 1000s of players playing together in the same universe with millions of AI controlled NPCs and hundreds of planets that you can land on and explore every square mile of hand-crafted, procedurally generated landscape complete with unique flora and fauna.

The part where you can do literally anything your mind can think of is also problematic, from rape to human trafficking to space court and filing interstellar insurance claims.

Flarpy posted:

That gets much more difficult in multi-crew ships.

We can expect Seatbelt Flip (alpha) before Helmet Flip 2.0. Give it a couple of weeks.

:ohdear:

I.N.R.I posted:

There aren't any sane people left that still talk about this game on a daily basis except for the people working on it and the people who have money invested in it
War is hell man

I agree however that the old subforum title incl.: obsessive insanity was more apropos than the current

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

TheAgent posted:

there's a few steps to not being insane about star citizen:

1. remember its a video game
2. remember to lol

But it's not a game... but that makes me lol... :aaaaa:

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Decrepus posted:

Much like your ship, every cubic inch of the gun's interior will be able to customized with a variety of modules. You can use that space inside the front of the gun to hold a small stealth module or very small passenger module.

Don't forget, Chris Roberts wants the bullets individually modeled as they leave the gun barrel. Just loving DO it!

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016
Sweet ride. What's that from?

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

trucutru posted:

Hey, it is really difficult to deal with z-fighting after you hack together a 32-into-64 bit coordinate system.

They literally reversed the arse of their own universe.

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

I.N.R.I posted:

Hi, hope you're all enjoying screaming at the videogame. This is just a reminder for you to call or visit your parents where possible because they love and care about you and want to hear about the things you're getting up to

If I shout downstairs loud enough they can hear me just fine :smugdog:

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

o7

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

MilesK posted:

Why would anyone watch football when they already have santaball?

wtf is santaball

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Beer4TheBeerGod posted:

I thought FPS was supposed to be a highly lethal tactical shooter?
That demo is highly lethal to my interest in playing the final MVP :shrug:

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Trammel posted:

Xi'an is a loving city of 14 million people in China with a 2,000 year history, and the capital of China for many dynasties.

Surely Crobbers could have picked another less obvious name for his race of inscrutable aliens, from the "Eastern Systems", "patient and refined", and ruled by a hereditary Emperor. Not a king. It's like they took every stereotyping of the inscrutable eastern peoples and threw it together, while borrowing the name of a major city from the area.

This bugs me too. Xian is also the contemporary Chinese name for China itself within the country. What are the other alien races and what real life stereotypes are they based on?

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Colostomy Bag posted:

Probably the Polacki with some light bulb change mechanic that requires three players.

I got this name in the free name change thread :colbert:

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Colostomy Bag posted:

Developer Ben's Fried Chicken

Bentucky Fried ChickenCivil Meat

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Wrecked Angle posted:

Who actually made this gif? It's the absolute closest thing to cig.gif that exists.

It's just so perfect, Chris just riding his spaceship dreams through a faked universe blissfully unaware of the deception that's going on beneath him*. And why should he care? As long as the money keeps coming in his ride continues, never getting any closer to his imagined destination. Down front the 2 'faces of the community' do what ever they can to keep shovelling money into the Star Citizen dream machine, while Sandi skillfully oversees the whole charade with her unique management style.

*I don't actually believe CR is unaware of the deception. gently caress Chris Roberts.

In the hornless version of the PAX 2014 stream:

"Look at the g forces! You guys wanted real physics, right! This is real Newtonian physics! Whoops I'm going backwards! Errrrrrrrr Newtonian mode OFF! See now I'm in decoupled mode... :downs:"

loving liar.

"It was working fine a minute ago!"

Fe: thanks everyone who told me what noclip is. Yep, that's loving noclip.

:laugh:, just :laugh:

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

:stare: The Star Citizen saga has it all.

If by "it all" you mean "a disproportionately, unsettlingly tolerant atmosphere for pedophiles"

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

nawledgelambo posted:

You think one of the artists is trying to tell the backers something?



It's me, I'm the 12-sided "round" cartoon button from Conker's Bad Fur Day (N64)

(stop doxxing me)

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

moveable shape posted:

*channels fyad morality* This post is as embarrassing as anything pulled from the dregs of /dereksmart. Basically nothing you wrote is real dude.

MP was pointed and funny until fyad gimmick locusts arrived. Maybe your pov is different because he shat on you constantly?

Anyway this being the last post on the matter I wanna say cat cookies were incredibly more funny than MPs last post. The little space ship shaped cookie was adorable

I would rather eat cat cookies than those 2 week old dusted cat turds that Scandinavian idiot posted in the last thread

Seriously, you want me to seal cookies in a container for weeks on end- and only then will they be "just right"? gently caress you.

In all seriousness, that thread was getting big for the sake of being big. Endless contentless posts just to artificially increase the page count. Bad thread mechanics, new refactor fixed everything :evilbuddy:

E: somebody find that post for my daily Two Minutes' Hate :argh:

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Tijuana Bibliophile posted:

are fresh cat turds better?

Apparently they have to sit in a dark airless tin for about a fortnight, then the fuckin danes are all over em

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Tijuana Bibliophile posted:

You're wrong concerning both fortnight and danes

Maybe you should read the thread again

Cymelion_bitchmade_canned_debate_response.txt

I'd look for the real thing but :effort:

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

The Titanic posted:

Hell, overworked artists are starting to crack, with adjustable "Honesty" knobs tucked into the ships they build now.
9/11Star Citizen is now an inside job :grin:

Good work goons. Our concerted FUD campaign has breached the main line- the only danger now is being trampled by leavers coming from the opposite direction. Of course, a debt of gratitude is owed to our Fifth Column mercenaries on Reddit and the official Robert Space Forums. Not to mention our developer/artist double agents (shout out to TheAgent) bringing the place down from the inside. :dukedoge:











(this is what shitizens actually believe)

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Thoatse posted:

I think it's fascinating to English speakers because Germans have words for things we either don't acknowledge or don't even have concepts of or as a society.

"There's no way this can be real. What are people spending all this money on? It's coming out when?

Starcitizenschämen: being dumbstruck by the fact that truth is stranger than fiction- even fan fiction- after reading Stimpire.txt for the first time, and realizing that a human actually wrote it.

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

less than three posted:

He even has "That's Money!" as a catchphrase

Stealing this as my catchphrase

e: CATCHPHRASE COPYRIGHT RYAN ARCHER DO NOT STEAL

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Tarquinn posted:

A dyslexic?

More of my favourite weird misspellings that I've never seen before Star Citizen. I don't think these are the German fans- these misspellings are the kinds of ones native English speakers who've only said the word and never written it would make. It's never the commonly misspelled words, either. hosed up

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Tijuana Bibliophile posted:

E:D is what Star Citizn't
:vince:

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

I.N.R.I posted:

Personally if I was going to hate something online for 8 years it would be something like the technology industry's reliance on child slave labour for coltan farming in the DRC or the many and storied transgressions of any one of countless Jewish political and financial institutions instead of a computer game.
What about shark finning, don't you give a poo poo about anything

Also your anti semitism is showing :rolleyes:

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016
"Personally if I were going to hate something for 8 years... it'd be the Jews":grin:

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

I.N.R.I posted:

I'm not sure what gave you that idea

I.N.R.I posted:

Personally if I was going to hate something online for 8 years it would be something like the many and storied transgressions of any one of countless Jewish political and financial institutions instead of a computer game.

I've Never Respected Israel

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016
Death of a Spaceman

e: ha ha ha wtf it's loving real https://robertsspaceindustries.com/comm-link/engineering/12879-Death-Of-A-Spaceman

Harold Stassen fucked around with this message at 01:36 on Dec 11, 2016

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016
Wow that story is almost as good as zybourne cllock

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

Oh great, more Stimpire lore posted:

In our setting of Banshee, there were ten stimpires which were united under ten galaxies. They were all allied as the United Galactic Stimpires, until one day, when the Sixth Stimpire noticed that the Fourth Stimpire was adopting laws that were against the regulations of the UGS. High-ranking military servants noticed that at the end of their favourite sporting event, the losing side was being rounded up, with all 11 players wailing in despair. They then noticed that the center of the stadium was now revealing a large, cylindrical container with a sharp floor. The floor was in the shape of a grinding grater, except there were several discs each turning very slowly, one being further out than the other from its center point. They were then pushed in by very powerful cybernetic stadium security officers, and the container was sealed up. It was then, to the horror of the colonels, that there was blood being smeared against the glass of the machine. They both left for their transit van, only to be stopped by Fourth Stimpire Enforcers. They demanded that they get past, only to be told that the Fourth Stimpire is a sovereign, socialist empire which listens to its people. They were then being transported to a greyscale soundproof room, with very sharp machinery decorating the room from all over.

They were never heard from or even seen again. The only traces of them were blood trails located in the very room. The Fourth Stimpire had announced to the UGC that it was now allied with Vanduul forces, and any attack will result in immediate deplanetation, much to the dismay of the UGC. The Seventh Stimpire warned them that the other nine would revoke their UGC rights if they carried on, but they did far from what they were demanding. The Fourth Stimpire didn't massacre the First Landmass population, but left them in the worst pain known in the universe for eternity. The drug was capable of keeping the victim the same age as they were, halting growth and aging, whilst keeping them alive forever. All growth cells are killed and the drug repeats any respiratory cycles.

The other nine declared war on the Fourth Stimpire, which ultimately led to the demise of the First, Eighth, Ninth, Fifth and Tenth Stimpires. They were deplanetated, all of their planets were razed and reduced to nothing but an asteroid field, a reminder of the power of the Fourth Stimpire, and a historical monument, and a book, a tale of what was once a mighty, populated planet.

The Seventh Stimpire ordered their planets to be relocated out of the range of the Fourth Stimpire Satelitation Force through the use of planet movement technology. As the Seventh Stimpire was completely artificial, the planets were able to be relocated to a faraway place in the universe. The Second Stimpire however were unable to relocate, as they were natural to the full extent and had a ban on fighting on any kind. Weapons were not permitted in the territory, and anyone caught fighting would be exiled permanently from the planet. They were the Second Law, as the rest of the universe know them by.

The other stimpires were unable to relocate aswell, and ordered their planets to be mined until they were fresh clean, and turn artificial, so they could be moved away from threat. They did not want to meet the same fate as their brethren. As a result, the war that remains going on to this day, is now a fierce, stalemate battle. The United Earth Empire eventually joined to help them against the Fourth Stimpire in 2754, 100 years after the war began, but this would also lead to Vanduul interception, as the Vanduul were warmongering to the point of following the UEE's every move and intercepting it.

Endnote.

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016
Ugh I hate the fact that every time I open a book, no matter what's on the cover, inside it's Cormac McCarthy's Blood Meridian.

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

grimcreaper posted:

Don't even joke about that. With the way stupidity is on the rise it could drat well happen and be the reason he gets that award.

'Nobel Peace prize for... Reading animorphs!'

This made me legit lol because I'm picturing the Nobel guy onstage at the ceremony frantically looking around for something to give the award for, when he sees an Animorphs book on the lectern

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

aleksendr posted:

due to poor planning they are caught in a kind of "engineering ponzi scheme" where new sales of ships are actually paying for infrastructure and maintenance instead of progress on the game and that the only way out is to "sell more ships that wont exist for a long time" so they can hope to finish the game someday

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Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016

DapperDon posted:

Okay, so I finally took the time to read that. Whoever wrote this has a thing about injections.
For me the most heartbreaking thing about the stimpire is that even though this has been happening for 500 years, these sickening truths have been revealed only today

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