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Happyman
Jul 20, 2011

Say, do you take your mask off when you go to the bathroom?

Hello! The TEW13 Monday Night War LP is over after some 3 years. We're moving on to a new game and a new time period. It's the night after Money in the Bank 2011. On the Raw side, CM Punk beat John Cena and ran off with the WWE Championship. On SmackDown, Daniel Bryan just won Money in the Bank. Fan expectations are at a massive high - don't disappoint them.

We're a few months away from the original brand split being dissolved, as Raw has all the stars and exposure. But there's a small change being made here: instead of being kayfabe fired because he lost to Punk, Cena goes to Smackdown. Now Smackdown gets a chance to turn things around, while Raw establishes its new top guy (whenever he comes back).

Also, by popular demand, TNA will be a playable third show, following the same rules ECW did in my old thread - a limit of 4 bookers, and brief writeups.

The LP & Rules

The concept: Teams of goons book competing wrestling shows through a game master (me) running TEW.

In the Monday Night War thread, you had full control of both the business and booking sides of things, being that everyone represented different companies. Here, the SmackDown and RAW teams will be working for the same company, so things will be slightly different for them:

- You will co-book PPVs, each team bringing one half of the show. The match with the most heat going in will get top billing on the card.
- Your main duties will be booking and talent relations. I'll be a kind of Vince McMahon, having control of hiring, firing, developmental, and other business matters. You are welcome to ask me to do certain things, but in the interest of fairness you can't be guaranteed to get your way.
- You're welcome to make any dealings you want amongst yourselves, such as talent trades. After WrestleMania there will be a big draft.

TNA will work pretty much the same as the companies in the old thread. You get to control hirings and firings, but you still have a boss who will give you owner goals to complete.

How to Join
Post, say what team you're joining, then come to Discord so you can get added to your team.

I opted for a Discord text channel instead of IRC rooms, since I figure it will be easier for people to get ahold of each other that way. There's an open general chat, and closed chats for each of the booking teams.

The Teams:
WWE RAW
Blooming Brilliant
Luigi Thirty
Sanguinia
IcePhoenix
GenericMartini
Abrasive Obelisk
Do not even ask

WWE SmackDown!
aperion
Basic Chunnel
ThePariah
DoctorGonzo
Venomous
Charlie72
sk
chirico cuvie

TNA Impact Wrestling - 4 slot limit
JunpeiHyde
Jenkem Delivery
rare Magic card l00k
(MISTEEEEEEEEEER) Jack Anderson
MazelTovCocktail

Happyman fucked around with this message at Feb 11, 2017 around 10:47

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Happyman
Jul 20, 2011

Say, do you take your mask off when you go to the bathroom?

The Talent:

(Strikethrough means they are under contract, but currently inactive.)

WWE RAW
- Male Roster -
Alberto del Rio - Mr. Money in the Bank
Alex Riley
Big Show
CM Punk - WWE Champion
Curt Hawkins
David Otunga - Tag Team Champion
Dolph Ziggler - United States Champion
Drew McIntyre
Evan Bourne
Goldust
Jack Swagger
John Morrison
JTG
Kofi Kingston
Mason Ryan
Michael McGillicutty - Tag Team Champion
The Miz
Rey Mysterio
R-Truth
Santino Marella
Skip Sheffield
Tyler Reks
Zack Ryder

- Female Roster -
Beth Phoenix
Brie Bella
Eve Torres
Gail Kim
Kelly Kelly - Divas Champion
Kharma
Melina Perez
Maryse Ouellet
Nikki Bella

- Commentary Team -
Jerry Lawler
Michael Cole

- Backstage & Other -
John Laurinaitis (Authority Figure)
Ricardo Rodriguez (Managing Alberto del Rio)
Stephanie McMahon (Authority Figure)
Triple H (Authority Figure)
Vickie Guerrero (Managing Dolph Ziggler)
Vince McMahon (Authority Figure)

WWE SmackDown!
- Male Roster -
Brodus Clay
Christian - World Heavyweight Champion
Cody Rhodes
Daniel Bryan - Mr. Money in the Bank
Ezekiel Jackson - Intercontinental Champion
The Great Khali
Heath Slater
Hornswoggle
Jey Uso
Jimmy Uso
Jinder Mahal
John Cena
Justin Gabriel
Kane
Mark "Ratings" Henry
Randy Orton
The Rock
Sheamus
Sin Cara
Ted DiBiase Jr.
Trent Baretta
Tyson Kidd
The Undertaker
Wade Barrett

- Female Roster -
AJ Lee
Alicia Fox
Kaitlyn
Layla
Natalya Neidhart
Rosa Mendes
Tamina Snuka

- Commentary Team -
Booker T
Matt Striker

- Backstage & Other -
Teddy Long (Authority Figure)
Vince McMahon (Authority Figure)

TNA Impact Wrestling
- Male Roster -
AJ Styles
Abyss
Alex Shelley
Anarquia
Austin Aries
Bobby Roode - Tag Team Champion
Brian Kendrick - X-Division Champion
Bully Ray
Chris Sabin
Crimson
D'Angelo Dinero
Devon
Douglas Williams
Eric Young - Television Champion
Gunner
Hernandez
James Storm - Tag Team Champion
Jeff Hardy
Jeff Jarrett
Jerry Lynn
Jesse Neal
Jessie Godderz
Kazarian
Kid Kash
Kurt Angle
Magnus
Mark Haskins
Matt Hardy
Matt Morgan
Mr. Anderson
Murphy
Okato
Robbie E
Rob Terry
Rob Van Dam
Samoa Joe
Scott Steiner
Shannon Moore
Sting - World Heavyweight Champion
Suicide (Christopher Daniels)
Zema Ion (has yet to debut)

- Female Roster -
Angelina Love
Jacqueline
Madison Rayne
Mickie James - Knockouts Champion
Brooke Tessmacher - Knockouts Tag Champion
ODB
Rosita
Sarita
Tara - Knockouts Tag Champion
Velvet Sky
Winter

- Commentary Team -
Mike Tenay
Taz

- Backstage & Other -
Christy Hemme (Personality)
Dixie Carter (Personality)
Eric Bischoff (Authority Figure)
Hulk Hogan (Authority Figure)
Karen Jarrett (Personality)
Ric Flair (Personality)
SoCal Val (Personality)

Basic Chunnel
Sep 21, 2010

Jesus! Jesus Christ! Say his name! Jesus! Jesus! Come down now!



I'm going to lay the smacketh down

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

You're tense, I'm calm. You apply excessive force, I
*snap*
OHHHH HECKUMS


I'd also like to be on RAW still

Jenkem Delivery
Feb 8, 2005

Death created time to grow the things that it would kill

I've been lurking in the other thread for a while, guess I might as well sign up. Put me on team TNA

ThePariah
Feb 10, 2014

Bad day, bad day, BAD DAY!

I would like to join Team Blue.

rare Magic card l00k
Jan 3, 2011

Me uni a la Revolucion #RXT


el sabe ...


TNA! TNA! TNA!

MazelTovCocktail
Jun 23, 2012
Sponsored by Manischewitz

I'll take TNA!

DoctorGonzo
Jul 25, 2016

We should all be so lucky


Id like to help team sd. My english is okay ish so i dont think i could write long stuff.

Venomous
Nov 7, 2011



This looks fun! I'll be on Smackdown.

Happyman
Jul 20, 2011

Say, do you take your mask off when you go to the bathroom?

DoctorGonzo posted:

Id like to help team sd. My english is okay ish so i dont think i could write long stuff.

Come to Discord, so I can add you to the team.

https://discord.gg/Qmhp4VH

DoctorGonzo
Jul 25, 2016

We should all be so lucky


Happyman posted:

Come to Discord, so I can add you to the team.

https://discord.gg/Qmhp4VH

Done!

GenericMartini
Oct 22, 2012

AYYYYY PAPI

I'll join RAW

Little Mac
Jan 3, 2006

Super Mario Bros 3

RIP Monday Night War. I'll be watching this one, too!

Sanguinia
Jan 1, 2012

#RXT REVOLUTION~!
2000



future scoopin'...


WELCOME EVERYONE TO MONDAY NIGHT RAAAAAAW!

Looking forward to this.

Abrasive Obelisk
May 2, 2013

I joined th
ROVPACK IN THE HOOUUUUSE!

he still knows...


I will take Raw too, per favore.

Charlie72
Apr 21, 2010


Sign me up for smackdown

Gooses and Geeses
Jan 1, 2005

OH GOD WHY DIDN'T I LISTEN?

Sure, I'll jump in. Put me on Smackdown!

sk
Dec 10, 2005

(イヤァオ!)


Grimey Drawer

put me on smackdown coach

Sanguinia
Jan 1, 2012

#RXT REVOLUTION~!
2000



future scoopin'...


For people who need a refresher on this period of wrestling and just what happened the night before this game starts, AEPodcast just started off a new review series which begins with Money In The Bank 2011. How handy! Learn who the players are and what they just finished doing.

https://soundcloud.com/the-attitude-era-podcast/tracks

Do not even ask
Apr 8, 2008

I'll be busting the moves and I'll be busting the rhymes, we'll be busting up laughing 'cause it's
PARTY TIME!


Looking forward to main eventer JTG

chirico cuvie
Jan 23, 2004
Made of beef and beef byproduct

Lipstick Apathy

Sure, I'll give it a shot. Is a spot on Smackdown fine?

Basic Chunnel
Sep 21, 2010

Jesus! Jesus Christ! Say his name! Jesus! Jesus! Come down now!



I think at this point we have 8 dudes on the team and there's only enough show for 5 or so continuous feuds, if that. It's gonna be a tight fit.

Not to let you all too far behind the curtain but my first order of business is to give Matt Striker a gimmicked microphone that translates all his commentary into the "adults talking" sound effect from Peanuts

NowonSA
Jul 19, 2013

I am the sexiest poster in the world!


I never have the time or willpower to really dive into booking this TEW stuff that I so adore reading, but I look forward to CM Punk's insane post MITB heat not being ruined and Christian getting a nice little gold watch WHC reign, then going after the WWE and U.S. championships in a wild bid to be the only man to hold every WWE title of the last 15-ish years that he'd be eligible for.

Blooming Brilliant
Jul 12, 2010



quote:

AbrasiveObelisk -huh, that sounds dangerous

Blooming Brilliant - viagra or steve martin?

I'm enjoying the RAW discord.

Jenkem Delivery
Feb 8, 2005

Death created time to grow the things that it would kill

Blooming Brilliant posted:

I'm enjoying the RAW discord.

TNA's discussions pretty much around new promo ideas for Steiner

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

You're tense, I'm calm. You apply excessive force, I
*snap*
OHHHH HECKUMS


NowonSA posted:

I look forward to CM Punk's insane post MITB heat not being ruined

DoctorGonzo
Jul 25, 2016

We should all be so lucky


Jenkem Delivery posted:

TNA's discussions pretty much around new promo ideas for Steiner

Steiner is a national treasure.

Also with Joey Styles on our brand we are ready to grab the wrestling world by the...

Joey Styles has been fired by Smackdown.

DoctorGonzo fucked around with this message at Jan 6, 2017 around 16:37

MazelTovCocktail
Jun 23, 2012
Sponsored by Manischewitz

DoctorGonzo posted:

Steiner is a national treasure.

Paper Lion
Dec 13, 2009





I'm sad that TNA filled up because Steiner needs to be the top star of a company in 2011 and leading a garbage brand into the future. Hell, in 2017 even.

DoctorGonzo
Jul 25, 2016

We should all be so lucky


Paper Lion posted:

I'm sad that TNA filled up because Steiner needs to be the top star of a company in 2011 and leading a garbage brand into the future. Hell, in 2017 even.

dumb post. deleted.

DoctorGonzo fucked around with this message at Jan 6, 2017 around 17:27

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

You're tense, I'm calm. You apply excessive force, I
*snap*
OHHHH HECKUMS


wow spoilers

Do not even ask
Apr 8, 2008

I'll be busting the moves and I'll be busting the rhymes, we'll be busting up laughing 'cause it's
PARTY TIME!


Put me on Team Raw. I'm ready to drive Sanguinia up the wall with all of my awful awful booking ideas.

Sanguinia
Jan 1, 2012

#RXT REVOLUTION~!
2000



future scoopin'...


Speaking of awful booking ideas!



quote:


NO CHANCE! THAT'S WHAT YOU'VE GOT! Its a cold open as Vincent Kennedy McMahon, the Chairman of the Board, makes his way to the ring with a grim expression. Michael Cole and Jerry "The King," Lawler welcome us to Monday Night Raw, live from Green Bay, Wisconsin. We are less than 24-hours removed from Money In The Bank and the historic victory, and even more historic departure, of the current WWE Champion: CM Punk.

The crowd is absolutely raucous, and Vince is drowned in 'CM Punk,' chants three times as he attempts to start his address. Finally, he powers through: "Last night, this company... MY company was embarrassed. My company was embarrassed, my family was embarrassed, and most importantly, I was embarrassed. I was embarrassed by a man you all consider to be a 'hero.' Well that man, who's name I will NOT speak... ('CM Punk!' 'CM Punk!')... THAT MAN is not a hero! He is nothing more than a petty! Ungrateful! Selfish! PIECE! OF HUMAN! GARBAGE! And he has stolen, STOLEN, something that is rightfully mine! If I had anything to say about it, he would walk out to this ring RIGHT NOW so I could wring his scrawny neck myself, and take back MY championship, personally!"

After letting the crowd roar at this notion, Vince continues: "But... but, unfortunately for me, he is not here tonight. (Boooooo!) That's right, ladies and gentlemen, your hero isn't here tonight. You know why? Because when he walked out of Chicago with the WWE Championship, he was abandoning you. Even as you cheered and celebrated, he was leaving you, the audience, and every person behind that curtain who admires him, behind. Like the greedy ingrate he is, C-*ahem* ('CM PUNK!' 'CM PUNK!) THAT! MAN! has gotten what he wanted, and so he has abandoned you!"

"You all THINK that you got what you wanted too! You think that man stood up for the little guy, struck a blow for the people, gave Vince McMahon a much-needed punch to the face. I'm willing to bet that you'll even cheer for this little announcement: earlier today, as I promised, for failing to defeat that man, JOHN CENA! IS! FIIIIIIRED!" This indeed prompts a huge cheer. "John Cena will never return to Monday Night Raw! Its just like you always dreamed it would be when one of 'your guys,' finally won the big one, right? But I have news for all of you people! I'm still here! VINCE MCMAHON IS STILL STANDING! AND YOUR HERO IS NOT COMING BACK!"

"So, since I am the one still standing, as always, whatever I say goes. And I say that man is, from this day forward, erased from WWE history! Last night never. Even. Happened. And that means that since John Cena has been fired, we don't have a WWE Champion. So tonight, on Monday Night Raw, we will start an 8-man Tournament! The two finalists will face off at Summerslam to name a new WWE Champion! And the first match of that tournament is going to be RIGHT! NOW! ...Boy, this is exciting, isn't it? A new champion, and it could be almost anyone. But the best part is, I know... and you know... exactly who it WON'T be." Vince smirks as he holds up the mic, and allows the crowd to chant: CM Punk. CM Punk. CM Punk.

***

Rey Mysterio vs Drew McIntyre! BOOYAKA BOOYAKA! Rey was out first for the first match of the tournament, taking his time with the crowd and handing out head-touches and extra masks to the kids. Drew McIntyre was naturally not as friendly. Rey starts out fast and tries to keep Drew off balance, but the Scotsman manages to take control and keep him grounded. Commentary put over The Chosen One as a young stallion out to make a name off Rey's back, using his significant size, weight, power and youth advantage over Mysterio to great effect. Rey continues trying to get into the air to get the crowd behind him, but McIntyre manages to take him back down time and time again.

However, when he sets up the Future Shock underhook DDT, Rey shows veteran instincts and still-peerless agility, countering the hold into a hurricanrana! A flurry of quick moves culminates in a snap drop-toe-hold, setting up the 6! 1! 9! Rey wastes no motions going straight up the turnbuckle and into the dead fish splash! 1, 2, 3! Misterio moves on to the semifinals!

***

"Backstage, Brie and Nikki, the Bella Twins, seem to be looking for something. They pause to stare at a few passing men, mumbling to each other, but ultimately moving on. Finally, they catch sight of a familiar figure leaning against a wall: its Brooklyn's own JTG!

They approach from behind and try to catch his attention: "Heeey, its JTG!" "Money money, yeah, yeah!" "Right? I always loved that! I mean, the catchphrase, not money." "We're not the kind of shallow women who are only into money!" "Of course not! J knows that, don't you J?"

JTG seems to be nodding along to their words, and replies with a 'drat strait,' to Nikki's question, so the girls push forward even though he doesn't look their way. "Listen J, Brie and I, we've been feeling kind of.... lonely recently." "Unfulfilled." "Exactly! Its like there's something missing from our lives." "We're ladies J, and ladies need to be cared for." "Pampered!" "Right? But the problem is... I mean, look at us! We're basically the hottest women on Earth." "And on top of that, we're twins. TWINS, J!" "The point is, most men just can't handle our... needs." "We need a REAL man J. A man who can satisfy our... needs." "So, how does that sound to you?"

"OH, drat, that sounds nasty as hell, man! Get outta here!" The Bellas, suitably shocked by this response, drop their temptress facades and walk off in a huff. JTG then turns to reveal that his hidden ear had a bluetooth headset! "Listen man, I'm sorry about your food poisoning, but I gots to go. Peace." He hits the button just as a stage hand walks by in disbelief, and quickly explains just what he missed out on. "drat... why I pick up my phone?"

***

David Otunga and Michael McGillicuty vs ????! The Tag Champions, cast-offs from the dissolution of the group known as Nexus, won their titles under 'controversial,' circumstances. Michael Cole's sources say this mystery opponent match was booked as some kind of test, but not by whom. The champs are kept waiting a few moments... and then a battle cry rings out! It's the haka of Jimmy and Jey, the Usos! They've jumped ship to Monday Night Raw!

Otunga finds himself quickly overwhelmed by the preferred pace of the Usos, who show off their flashy, acrobatic offense and their specialty with tandem moves. King demands to know what Smackdown guys are doing fighting Raw's champions, and Cole informs us that the Usos are not only twin brothers. They're the sons of retired Superstar Rikishi, and the heirs to the Anao'i Wrestling Dynasty, a family nearly as prolific in the sport as the Harts. The Anao'is have produced three of WWE's most decorated past tag teams: The Wild Samoans, The Samoan Swat Team, and 3 Minute Warning! Whoever signed these guys to test the Champs clearly has an eye for talent.

Despite the overwhelming attack, Otunga manages to gut out multiple pin attempts, showing impressive toughness. Jey looks for a satellite DDT, but Otunga counters with an inverted atomic drop and McGillicuty adds a dropkick, giving his partner the space needed to make the tag despite the referee's protestations. McGillicuty takes Jey apart with surgical precision, grounding him with amateur holds and attacking his legs. A superkick allows Jey to make the hot tag to Jimmy, but McGillicuty scouts his running lariat and counters with his one-armed swinging neckbreaker, the McGillicuter! Jimmy is out, and Otunga assists with a backbreaker hold, allowing Michael to finish the job with a diving elbow. 1, 2, 3, Champs Win!

***

After the commercial, we got a hype video showing highlights from Ricky Steamboat's career in the WWF. Spots from his best matches, his best promos, and his legendary feud with the late Macho Man. It closes on his World Championship win at Chi-Town Rumble '89, as he hoists up a small child in a green karate gi alongside the title belt, and the voice of Jim Ross saying "Ricky Steamboat with tears in his eyes, holding his youngster... and see what his dad won for him - for him - for him-im-im..." The echo fades into a music change and new footage, showing a lithe young wrestler executing many of the same maneuvers we just saw in those legendary highlights. Three particularly hard-hitting blows are interspersed with text: A NEW. DRAGON. RISES! Richie Steamboat, coming soon to Monday Night Raw

***

Back in the locker room, Otunga and McGilicutty are kicking back after their win when they're confronted by perhaps the most stereotypical businessman to ever live. In a gravely voice, he introduces himself: "Gentlemen! I'm John Laurenitis, Executive Vice President of Talent Relations. I don't think we've ever met in person before." The Tag Champs shake his hand.

"There's so many of you boys I've never gotten to meet in person even though I'm the guy who cuts your checks and signs your contracts. Its a drat shame, but I'm sure I don't have to tell a Harvard Lawyer how much paperwork my job entails, eh Mr. Otunga? And you, Mr. McGillicuty, a 3rd Generation Sports Entertainer. I'm sure I don't have to tell someone with your pedigree how many wheels need to keep spinning behind that curtain so you can perform? Still, that's no excuse really. My name's been coming up more and more since that... former employee mentioned it on-air during that incident several weeks back. What are the boys calling it? 'The Pipe Bomb?' Anyway, since people are talking about me, I figure its about time I get my hands a little dirty around here, if you catch my meaning. And I can already tell, you two? You've got a big future. Hiring you was clearly an Ace Move. Keep in touch, alright?" The tag champs seem very pleased by this encounter, and share a fist-bump.

***

Zach Ryder vs R-Truth! The Long Island Iced-Z was WOO WOO WOO'ing all the way to the ring. WOO! WOO! WOO! Shortly after R-Truth came out, mic in hand, no music playing. He started ranting as he made his way down. "You know what I know, Ryder!? You know, that I know, that you know, that I know... you don't know IT! And IT, Isn't even worth knowing! Bet you didn't know that!" I miss the rapping. Getting into the ring he paced around manically while bellowing into his mic. "But all the Little Jimmies, they know IT, and I know IT..." Taking to the center of the ring, Truth yelled, "So why don't you make some noise, MILWAUKEE WISCONSII... Nah nah nah, you know what, you Little Jimmies don't deserve IT! And you know IT!"

King loudly reminds Truth that "You're in Green Bay, you dolt!"

Match was above average back-and-forth action, aided by the crowd being hot for Truth getting their name wrong. R-Truth got the upperhand in the latter half and never let go of... it. Ryder almost pulled out the upset, countering an axe kick with a neckbreaker and going up top for the Rough Ryder, but Truth ducked underneath and nailed him with a Lie Detector in return. Truth wins in just under ten minutes.

***

"Excuuuuse me..." BOOOOO! "I SAID EXCUSE ME!" BOOOOO! The incomparable Vikki Guerrero faces her usual welcome, and screeches into the microphone so she can be heard over the heckling. "It is my honor to introduce: The greatest United States Champion in WWE History, my client AND boyfriend, The Showoff DOLPH ZIGGLER!" She claps as Dolph's music hits, and he offers her an arm to properly escort her to the ring.

Once they arrive, Ziggler speaks. "Can you believe it? Dolph Ziggler takes one night off and everything goes right down the toilet. There we were, snacking on strawberries in Miami Beach, enjoying a vacation due to lack of worthy challengers for my title. I tune in to Money In The Bank, and as I watch that event play out... I mean, when I'm not getting an eyeful of the world's sexiest woman in her leopard-print thong... What do I see in the main event? I see... nothing. You know why I saw nothing? Because Mr. McMahon said so." The crowd riles up with Punk chants, and Ziggler waits them out before moving on. "Anything Mr. McMahon says is good enough for Dolph Ziggler. That's why I don't have to fight UNWORTHY challengers like John Cena did last night. And that's why I'm not FIRED!"

They two heels have a good laugh at this, before coming to point: "So now your United States Champion, Dolph Ziggler, has been made part of this WWE championship tournament. Next week I have my first round match, and I'm gonna win it all baby! Oh, you can bet on that! I'm going to be a DOUBLE Champion. Because there is nobody in this roster good enough to-" Ziggler's rant is interrupted by an unexpected theme: its Justin Gabriel!

Vikki demands to know what a Smackdown wrestler is doing interrupting her client. "Vikki, honestly, I'm just sorry I didn't interrupt him before we all had to hear about your thong." Vikki gasps like a carp at this, while Ziggler exclaims that she has the body of the goddess! "Yeah, I know. I can't remember his name but he's the one that sits around all day drinking wine and getting fat, right?" Ziggler throws a punch to defend his lady's honor, but Justin blocks and smoothly counters into a hammerlock without losing his mic! "Whoa, slow down cowboy. I came out here to talk, alright?" Vikki pleads and Dolph relaxes, so Gabriel releases him with a friendly slap.

"What am I doing here? I'll tell you Vikki. I watched the main event last night too. And I didn't see 'nothing.' I saw the future. I saw somebody like me, who's been ignored because he didn't fit the mold, stand up for himself. I saw somebody like Dolph, marketable and corporate-friendly, go down in flames. And I saw the Boss, who keeps men like me down, and men like you up, completely humiliated. In short, I saw the dream I fought for as a member of Nexus come to life, right in front of my eyes. And I needed to be a part of it. As of tonight, I am a full-time member of the Raw roster!"

Ziggler claps and says that's nice, but this is his time slot so he wants Gabriel to leave or be removed. "I don't think so, Dolph. See, my first Raw match is up next, and I came out here to tell you: watch it. Closely. Because my roster change came with a little perk. I get to be part of the tournament too. And the opponent I specially requested for the first round... is YOU! You know why, Dolph? Because after I beat you next week, and after I become World Champion... I'm going to follow last night's example, and rescue that US championship from an rear end-kisser!"

We go to commercial with Dolph talking trash off-mic, and the promise that Justin Gabriel's Raw debut is up next!

***

Justin Gabriel vs Local Jobber! We came back from commercial and Gabriel was in the ring with some unknown guy. They chain wrestled for a bit to start so Gabriel could show off his agility, and he easily came out on top. Then came a suite of signature moves, almost all of them airborne in nature. After a couple more minutes of flashy offense and reversals, Gabriel knocked nameless down near the corner, setting up his finisher, the 450 Splash! 1, 2, 3, easy win for Gabriel.

***

Backstage, we find the suit from earlier, John Laurenitis, offering congratulations to someone off-camera for their big win last night. We pan out to reveal Mr. Money In The Bank, Alberto Del Rio! "Mr. Lauren-eyetis, not that I'm not happy to meet you in person, but I think... this is not a social call, yes? I think you're here because I demanded to know why this little tournament is happening. I'm Seņor Dinero El Banco! And before John Cena convinced Mr. McMahon to reinstate that perro who beat him last night, I was #1 Contender. So why am I preparing for a tournament match instead of being handed my title?"

"That's a good question Mr. Del Rio. Let me ask you a good question: if you hadn't let... certain people... leave the building last night, if you hadn't taken a blow to the head and ended up on your back instead of in the ring, don't you think you would be Champion right now? And don't you think, if that were the case, that everyone around here would be a lot better off?"

Alberto seems to be only barely containing his rage at this until John moves on: "Of course, WWE Management doesn't want to discount the fact that you made the effort. On the contrary, the fact that you uh... answ... that you showed up when you were needed is great. I think it proved that you're a guy I can point to when management needs something 'special.' But there's one problem: some parties worry that you might not be reliable. I mean, lets face it, you couldn't beat Edge, or his little friend Christian, when you got World Title opportunities this year. And the fact is, you came up short when you were called last night. What I need from you, Mr. Del Rio, is to show me what you're made of. To show me that giving you a space on this roster wasn't just a good decision, but an... Ace Decision."

Del Rio asks what he has in mind, and Laurenitis reveals that he's going to settle a score that was left unsettled two months back at Capital Carnage: his opponent tonight is The Big Show! Del Rio reacts with panic. "What's wrong Mr. Del Rio? Oh, I see, you missed the news preparing for the ladder match. Last night Big Show's opponent, Mark Henry? He slammed Show's ankle several times inside a folding chair. Official reports aren't out of the trainer's office yet, but Big Show is competing tonight Against Medical Advice." Del Rio's expression becomes predatory at this news. "So, can you show me what I need to see, Mr. Del Rio?"

"Mr. Lauren-eyetis... tonight, Alberto Del Rio is going to show what everyone needs to see. Alberto Del Rio is going to show his DESTINY. ...But you already knew that." Wink.

***

Reks and Hawkins vs Kofi Kingston and Evan Bourne - Air Boom!. Coming back from commercials, we had tag team action. Tyler Reks and Curt Hawkins were already in ring, trotting around looking mean, or as mean as Tyler Reks and Curt Hawkins can look. Their opponents are Kofi Kingston and Evan Bourne, high fiving kids and jumping down the ramp to set off fireworks. Commentary put over that with the Tag Titles being a hot RAW commodity, and King mentioned that some in the back consider them to be the most legitimate titles in the company in light of last night. Cole talks fast to sandbag that comment, making a comment about not rocking the boat, and adds that lots of superstars are throwing their lots in together for opportunities at those belts. Kofi and Evan have even gone so far as to officially register a full-time tag team competitors, which is why the ring announcer referred to them by the team name "Air Boom." King thinks that spliced entrance music need work.

Good amount of action from this. Kofi and Evan worked super well together and put on a strong showing. Reks and Hawkins looked fairly decent, although they couldn't keep up with their opponent's speed. Late into the match after some dirty outside work by Hawkins, Reks was able to dominate Bourne with sheer power. Kofi delt with Hawkins on the outside while Reks stacked up Evan, setting him up for a Burning Hammer! But before Reks could land it he turned straight into a Trouble In Paradise, knocking him clean out! Legal man Evan climbed to the top rope and smashed Reks with a Shooting Star Press for the pinfall win. A strong start for Air Boom!

***

After the next break, the ring was set up with leather couches, directors chairs and a red carpet. Down the ramp came The Miz (wearing the brightest white suit you could possibly have) hand-in-hand with a surprising companion, Maryse Ouellet. "Welcome everyone to the most must-see talk show in WWE history..." The crowd booed while Miz mugged for the camera. "...Miz TV! And today is a very special Miz TV because today we introduce a beautiful, intelligent, radiant new co-host. You may know her from NXT Redemption... my new girlfriend, Maryse!" Michael Cole immediately defends Miz's choice in women before King can comment on how many boyfriends Maryse has had.

"It's not every day that an A-Lister like me graces the filthy streets of Milwaukee. You didn't expect me to come here without something nice to look at, did you? And with this welcome, I don't know if I'm coming back here!" Miz raises his hand to try to silence the crowd but they didn't stop, of course. Unflappable, he continues anyway. "I'm supposed to have a guest on Miz TV tonight. I, of course, was granted a spot in Mr. McMahon's tournament, and I'm supposed to meet my 'mystery,' opponent before our match next week. But frankly, I'd much rather talk about myself. You see, today is a landmark day in WWE, because finally real opportunity exists. For ten years, there has been, as my good friend R-Truth put it, a conspiracy. A conspiracy to keep John Cena on top, because he sells T-Shirts and cheap plastic toys. I was the biggest victim of that conspiracy! I main-evented Wrestlemania, defeated Cena, and the next day every headline was about him and The Rock! Well guess what kids, there IS no John Cena anymore. He's FIRED."

"But you know what's even better than Cena being gone? Its the fact that YOUR GUY is gone too." (CM Punk! CM Punk!) "Yeah, that's the one. See, you've all kept me down too! You don't appreciate me! I could have saved you from Cena, but I'm not 'underground' enough for you. So you cheered for a guy that walked out instead! I mean, Really? REALLY? REALLY!? Well guess what, he's gone. Without him, and without Cena, there is NOTHING in my way anymore. I will be the new face of this company. Why? BECAUSE I'M THE MIZ! AND I-"

A massive guitar riff hits! IT'S JOHN MORRISON! Back from neck surgery, the Shaman of Sexy poses in slow-motion as fireworks go off behind him. Miz looks suitably shocked. "Miz! Buddy. Good to see you." He bounces into the ring and stretches himself out across one of Miz's couches. "I think I'm supposed to be on this show, right?" Miz seems incredulous that Morrison is his opponent after being in the shelf for several months. "Well, they said I should take a little more time in rehab, yeah. But let me open up the gates to the Palace of Wisdom for you, Mizzy." Morrison swings up from his rest and gets in Miz's face: "We're in a moment of transcendent history. There's a cosmic energy in the WWE right now. The People have their voice again, and they're making waves that are going to push somebody to the top! If the guy they want most isn't here to catch that wave, you bet your rear end that John Morrison will!"

Miz knocks over his chair to get some distance from JoMo, and Maryse steps between them. "Hey, Maryse! Miz, I gotta say I'm impressed. After all those years we spent as a tag team, I never thought you'd be able to get a girl who used to be into me." Maryse seems unimpressed, though Miz does step in with an angry look and says that he's glad Morrison is his opponent. Everyone's seen for years now that The Miz is the better man between them, and he'll prove it again next week. "You know Miz, you may have a point. You've been WWE Champion, you have a fine lady... but the funny thing is, I'VE got a fine lady too. She's coming to ringside with me next week. And as great as your little second-hand french poodle is, she's not even in the same league as who I've got. So I'm gonna beat you, and everyone else in this tournament, and when I'm WWE Champion and I have a hotter girlfriend then you... tell me again who's the better man."

***

The Main Event! Alberto Del Rio vs The Big Show! Show has an obvious limp as he makes his way down the ramp, and we are reminded that he is competing AMA tonight. Michael Cole reads from Show's twitter: "Chances at a title don't come every day. Chances to make something fake turn real don't come every lifetime. #ForgetPain #SaveWWE" As always, Alberto is introduced by Ricardo Rodriguez, his personal ring announcer, and drives into the arena in a $100,000 Excalibur Roadster! Mr. Money in the Bank hoists his briefcase high, taunting the crowd.



At the bell, Del Rio takes a clinical approach, probing Show's defenses, testing his mobility. The giant is clearly minimizing his movement, relying on his superior reach, but Del Rio is to quick for him to really get his hands on, and he absorbs several early blows as a result. Del Rio's target is clearly the damaged leg, although Show is able to use his bulk and several impressive power moves that send Del Rio flying like a rag-doll. The pace of the match remains slow (to the point of obvious stalling, as his power offense seems to have left Show gassed) until Del Rio slides right under his defense with a baseball slide and topples him!

Now nearly helpless, Show endures an absolute assault on his injured leg, multiple kneebreakers and stomps tearing at the joint. After several minutes of damage and trash talk, Del Rio sets up a kneebar to finish the job... but with pure power Show kicks him into the corner! He drags himself up and delivers echoing open-palm slaps to Del Rio's chest, hushing the crowd each time to maximize the impact. Not daring to waste another moment, Show signals the Chokeslam, grabs Del Rio's neck... and is distracted by Ricardo climbing up on the apron! The referee rushes to get rid of Ricardo, and Show turns toward the commotion, leaving him wide open for a vicious chop-block that puts him on his knees, screaming in agony! Del Rio gives a blood-thirsty scream of his own, and delivers a sickening mule kick right to the temple. Show's lights go out, and Del Rio covers. 1! 2! 3! Mr. Money In The Bank advances to the second round to close out Monday Night Raw

***

Overall Rating: B


This one was a little longer than I had hoped, because I tried to write everything that I wrote assuming a first-time viewer/somebody who doesn't remember 2011. Character establishment and setting details (especially those that establish Punk's central importance to everything and how widespread the fallout from last nights event was) was a premium concern. I'll be more truncated going forward, since I even ballooned stuff that other people wrote with extra details for that purpose. Hopefully readers will find the effort worth it.

Sanguinia fucked around with this message at Jan 7, 2017 around 05:30

rare Magic card l00k
Jan 3, 2011

Me uni a la Revolucion #RXT


el sabe ...




HEY EVERYONE, IT'S YOUR OLD BUDDY DON WEST HERE, AND HAVE I GOT SOMETHING SPECIAL...FOR YOU! NOW I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING, "DON, HOW CAN ANYTHING BE BETTER THAN THE BROWN BAG SPECIAL, WHERE YOU GET RANDOM ITEMS FOR A MERE $15, INCLUDING DVDS, T-SHIRTS, AND MORE!" WELL WHAT I HAVE HERE FOR YOU IS A rare DON WEST l00k AT THE LATEST EPISODE OF TNA IMPACT. LET'S CHECK IT OUT!

TNA Impact: Cross The Line! posted:

Immortal (Hulk Hogan, Eric Bischoff, Scott Steiner, Jeff Jarrett) come out, and Hogan is very angry about not having the TNA World Title in Immortal, and demands that Sting comes to the ring. That Joker Sting comes to the ring, gets in, and announces to the world that the champ is here and IT'S SHOWTIME. Before he can continue, Hogan prepares to scream at Sting until Bischoff calms him down, and proudly declares that the strongest, toughest, most gifted wrestler in Immortal will be facing Sting for the TNA World Title at Hardcore Justice. Scott Steiner prepares to step up as that man is announced...JEFF JARRETT. Steiner stares on in shock as Sting laughs and says that for a second he was worried he was going to be facing Steiner, but it looks like Big Poppa Pump is just Bischoff's Bitch Pump. Steiner gets into a frothing rage, but turns it not on Sting, but on Immortal. Even without a mic, everyone can hear Steiner yelling about how he's bigger, strongest, sexier, and smarter than anyone in Immortal, and HE should be getting the loving title shot!

Samoa Joe wrestles Mr. Anderson in an even bout, until they brawl up the ramp and are both counted out!

Mr. Anderson gets the advantage, and grabs a pipe that is lying around. He prepares to bash Joe's head in, when a man who identifies himself as Okato (we think? I don't speak Orient, Tenay.) convinces him to not do it. After Anderson walks off, Joe stares at Okato, and looks confused before offering a tentative thanks before walking off.

A VIDEO OF VELVET SKY'S rear end. SHE IS VERY HOT.

A debuting Zema Ion pins Kid Kash.

Douglas Williams, Magnus, and D'Angelo Dinero defeat Rob Terry, Robbie E, and Jerry Lynn when Dinero pins Robbie E.

In his office, Eric Bischoff, Hulk Hogan, Bully Ray, and Abyss are still trying to calm down an irate Scott Steiner. Steiner says he wants Sting's rear end, and dammit he wants it now, for the title! Bischoff says that he won't do that, as they can't do World Title matches on normal TV, that'd be stupid and not get these marks to give up their money. However, what Bischoff will do is give Scott Steiner an outlet, against a man who was TNA World Champion not very long ago, one Rob Van Dam. In addition, it'll be inside a Steel Cage, and there will be no escape! It must end in a pin, a submission, or knockout. Steiner thinks this is stupid loving bullshit, but it does calm him down enough that Hogan, Bully, and Abyss are able to lead him away while talking about how much Van Dam is going to bleed tonight. Bischoff sits back in his chair, when he realizes someone has been standing in the room the entire time! IT'S STING! Sting thinks Bischoff's idea for the main event is excellent, but he's offended at the idea that World Title matches should be on PPV and not free television. So, since Sting isn't going to defend his title tonight, he's got a special gift for Eric Bischoff, to keep him busy so he doesn't interfere in the match he just made. Sting reaches behind a curtain and pulls out A RAVEN. The Raven jumps onto Bischoff's desk, and Bischoff looks at the bird in terror. Bischoff tries to reach for his keyboard, and the bird bites at his hand. BISCHOFF SELLS FOR THE BIRD! Sting then leaves the room, cackling, and locks the door from the outside, trapping Bischoff and The Bird in the room.

In a 4 Way Match to Determine who gets an X Division Title Shot at Hardcore Justice - Austin Aries defeated Tony Nese (via pin), Alex Shelley, and Mark Haskins.

The Apex Redditor Le Brian Kendrick reacts to the 4 Way results backstage when Rosita walks up. Kendrick offers a tip of the fedora and a "m'lady", which is met by a look of confusion. Rosita thanks Brian for fixing her computer earlier in the week and asks if he's ready to take on Austin Aries at Hardcore Justice. Kendrick says he's up for the challenge of beating Aries and asks Rosita out for a post-Hardcore Justice romantic dinner to celebrate his inevitable win. Rosita can barely conceal her look of disgust and responds "Uhhh Brian....you're a nice guy but I think of you as a just a friend." She walks away while Kendrick sighs and sulks away, fedora in hand.

Rob Van Dam is interviewed by the newest member of the interview team, THE NATURE BOY RIC FLAIR. Flair talks about how there is nobody in the world more dangerous than an angry Scott Steiner, and tonight, RVD is going to be locked in a cage with him, what is RVD's plan on how to survive, let alone win? Rob laughs it off, and points out that he is The Whole drat Show, Mr. TNA, and it doesn't matter how dangerous Scott Steiner is, nothing is more dangerous than the wrestling of one Rob. Van. Dam. After RVD leaves, Flair shrugs and says that's probably right.

Gunner faces Eric Young. Gunner wins. That one guy with the Gunner avatar is probably really happy.

TNA World Tag Team Champions Beer Money come out, and talk about they are unquestionably the best tag team in the world today. Mexican America come out and disagree, then everyone brawls!

Kurt Angle squashes Ink Inc. It is great fun.

TNA Knockouts Champion Mickie James, Angelina Love, and Winter defeat Velvet Sky and Knockouts Tag Team Champions Brooke Tessmacher and Tara when Mickie pins Tessmacher.

Scott Steiner vs. Rob Van Dam in a No Escape Steel Cage. This match is simply brutal, as Steiner begins in control, and every time RVD gets some momentum, it gets cut off with a form of suplex. The end comes when RVD goes for the Rolling Thunder, only to be caught and dropped right on his head, then given a Steiner Screwdriver, and the referee is forced to stop the match when RVD passes out in the Steiner Recliner.

We return to the back, where we see Eric Bischoff crash through the glass window of his office to escape from THE VICIOUS BIRD. He's bruised and bleeding, but he survived Sting's monster, and thus he declares himself victorious. He stands up, brushes himself off, and goes to leave when suddenly a baseball bat swings into view, hitting Bischoff right in the face! We pan to the side and see a man holding a bat...and wearing a SCOTT STEINER MASK!

NOW, I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU GUYS, BUT THIS WAS A SOLID B SHOW TO ME. BIRD IS SOMETHING SPECIAL!

DoctorGonzo
Jul 25, 2016

We should all be so lucky


Le Brian Kendrick for world Champ.

Also that bella's segment totally happened. You cant fool me!

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

You're tense, I'm calm. You apply excessive force, I
*snap*
OHHHH HECKUMS


Of course it happened, we booked it!

Basic Chunnel
Sep 21, 2010

Jesus! Jesus Christ! Say his name! Jesus! Jesus! Come down now!





SMACKDOWN posted:

We begin this first SMACKDOWN of the post-MITB era with the requisite pyro and the raspy pipes of our Color man, Booker T! He lays out the events of MITB 2011 for casual viewers and says wherever the WWE goes from here is anyone's guess, and we're about to see some big moves being made.

We're also introduced to his dreaded partner in crime, Matt Striker, who has a large apparatus covering the lower half of his face, like a Lecter mask with a speaker built into it. Booker notes that this new contraption was designed to help Striker to find his full potential behind the desk. Striker, looking hyped as ever, apparently explains the situation further, though what comes out of the speaker is less English sentences than a series of sounds not unlike the ones made by parents in Peanuts cartoons. Having given his incomprehensible take, Striker and Booker return to the show at hand.

*****

Christian's theme song blasts through the speakers to kick off the show proper. Christian enters the arena with the World Heavyweight Championship over his shoulder and a poo poo-eating grin on his face. Christian gets into the ring and grabs a mic. He thanks the Cincinnati crowd for a warm welcome and congratulates all of them... for being able to witness the first Smackdown of Christian's glorious second reign! Christian puts over his hard-fought victory over Randy Orton, though on commentary Booker reminds us that Christian won the title by getting kicked in the nuts. "For this special occasion, there is only one man I want to share the ring with. My best friend, Edge!" Christian points to the stage as the fans go nuts.

"...who could not be here tonight." The fans boo the fake-out. Doing his best to hold back laughter, Christian says that Edge totally wanted to be there, though, and Edge texted him wishing him the best of luck in his second reign. Before Christian can go any further, Randy Orton's theme hits, much to the delight of the fans. Orton methodically walks down the ramp, stalking Christian. Eventually, Orton charges into the ring, but Christian immediately rolls outsode. Walking back up the ramp, Christian accuses Orton of being a poor sport. Christian claims that Randy may have ruined his first title run, but now that he has gotten his title back, he has the chance to make things right with one... more... run.


*****

Mark Henry is shown waiting outside the arena, chomping a cigar in a robin's egg blue suit. A black Escalade pulls to the curb and Henry waits as the driver opens the door for an extremely bulky man. Henry extends his hand to the man as he emerges "Langston, you're late."

They shake hands and you can hear fabric straining, the two looking at one another impassively. Henry smiles and nods, puffing smoke from between his teeth, before letting go. He speaks in a deep menacing baritone "Had my eye on you for awhile, glad you could join me here. There's a lot to be done, and while there ain't none of it I can't handle myself... It's good to have a right hand, right?" Langston just nods.

"Come on and I'll lay it all out for you. It's starting tonight. And Langston?... Don't ever keep me waiting again." Henry turns back toward the arena and Langston follows behind, massaging his own hand.

*****

In our first match of the night, Wade Barrett defeats a hirsute, masked jobber in a good 13 minute bout. As the jobber recovers from a missed 450, Barrett ends the match in surprising fashion when he simply clocks his opponent in the head with a gnarly right elbow. Booker T calls it the "Bullhammer Elbow", while Striker interjects with an ecstatic "wah bah wah wah, wahwah wah wah wah".

*****

After kicking the jobber out of the ring, Barrett takes to the mic. "On Sunday night I put everything I had, all my blood and guts on the line to seize the Money In the Bank contract. And I came close, despite the treachery and opportunism of former underlings and conniving nothings. But I've come to terms with something, with who I am. I am a prizefighter. And prizefighters fight for titles, not the chance to contend for titles. On Sunday I lost nothing."

"Which brings me to why I'm here now. Because it's funny, when you go back to the Money In the Bank show and you see talent of all kinds and qualities, fighting for titles and bragging rights, and notice who's not there, what's not being fought over."

He points directly at the camera. "Ezekiel Jackson! You do not respect your prize enough to defend it in the ring. You are nothing, a paper champion, you cheapen your championship. It took my defeat at Money In the Bank to realize that I've not properly fought for a prize, and you've not yet fought a real prizefighter. However you came to that belt, Jackson, you are not a fighter, but I am. And that's why I'm coming for the Intercontinental Championship. Stop me, if you've got the bollocks."

*****

After commercial, John Cena comes out (to his trademark mix of boos and cheers, all robust) and cuts a promo, claiming that his loss at MITB has him humbled, and that he's come to Smackdown not to flee a defeat but to start again in a place where he isn't fighting on behalf of Vince McMahon, where he can represent the company he loves and not its self-serving, ego-maniacal owners.

Cena stops and smirks as Christian's theme music hits and the champ makes his way out from back and down to the ring. Christian is outraged, saying that nobody goes for his title (which he holds aloft) until they prove that they're worthy of the shot.

Cena points out that at no point did he declare contendorship, and urprisingly, he agrees with Christian's sentiment, self-serving as it is. He says the competition is fierce on Smackdown, and even though he could take Christian on his worst day, it would be a poor show of respect to his new home to jump the line and win the WHC on his first night.

Before any further provocation can occur, Cena and Christian are interrupted by none other than Smackdown GM Teddy Long! Long doesn't seem to have heard the exchange, because from the stage he says the momentous arrival of the former Doctor of Thugganomics demands a momentous spectacle (playa). Tonight's main event has Christian putting his title up against John Cena! Both Cena and Christian protest in angry confusion (Christian a little moreso), but Long raises his hand between them, simply refusing to listen. The two men in the ring are left stunned. Christian clutches at his title and rolls out of the ring, cursing on his way up the ramp.

*****

Out of his suit and in his ring gear, Mark Henry takes on the Celtic Warrior Sheamus in a lengthy 19-minute slugfest. At minute 12, things got out of control, as Sheamus accidentally whipped Henry into a corner while the ref was in the way, taking him out for a full 5 minutes during which the brawl spilled out into the crowd. Shortly after the ref regained consciousness, the fight found its way back into the ring and Henry put down Sheamus with the World's Strongest Slam after a rattling headbutt spot. The number "1" appears on the Titantron.

*****

In a pre-taped segment, Natalya states her intention to win the Divas championship at SS. "Kelly Kelly is a disgrace to women's wrestling, and I'm going to bring that title home to a division that values WRESTLING, not eye candy." The interviewer asks how Natalya can win the Diva's title when it is exclusive to RAW--is she switching brands? Nattie responds that the plan is already in motion and that it will become clear on next week's RAW.

*****

Still images are shown of Daniel Bryan's victory in the Smackdown MITB ladder match. Josh Matthews announces Daniel, who enters the arena to a chorus of cheers. Bryan says that for the last year he has fought tooth and nail to prove everyone in the WWE that he has what it takes to be a main eventer.

He says that winning MITB is an opportunity to prove he is the best wrestler in the company, not just by winning the championship but by dominating all his competition in the meantime. He delivers an open challenge - he will face a new opponent every week with his MITB briefcase on the line. When the time comes that he decides to put his contract in play, his record (not to mention his continued ownership of the case) will prove beyond all doubt that he will be a true and deserving champion.

*****

With that, we are given the first match of the Daniel Bryan MITB Open Challenge as Tyson Kidd makes his entrance, ready to take his shot. Pretty back and forth match between the two superstars, as each worker tries to outclass the other in technical wrestling style. Tyson gains the upper hand after an eye rack and goes for the cover, but Bryan comes back after a series of stiff looking elbows and starts to work Tyson's arm. After a top rope maneuver by Tyson fails to connect, Bryan wins by applying a flawless Lebelle Lock. Tyson is forced to tap, and Bryan has claimed the first victory of his Open Challenge. "Wah wahbah wah wah wah wahbah wah", Striker exclaims. We take it to mean that Bryan and Kidd seem to click in the ring.

******

It's time for the main event! After Cena enters first to his usual fanfare, a sullen-looking Christian follows him. The match plays out like a standard TV main event, starting off with the two competitors acting carefully, measuring each other's abilities, before ramping up into a back-and-forth contest. Christian takes the advantage thanks to his veteran intellect and some minor bending of rules, giving as good as he gets, but Cena looks primed to eventually makes his inevitable comeback.

At the 21-minute mark, the fans are hot and awaiting the outcome of the match, which seems uncertain even given the challenger. As the action reaches its zenith, Mark Henry suddenly saunters out onto the stage, flanked by Langston, still in his suit from earlier. Cena seems to immediately sense that something is amiss, distracted by their sudden entrance and staring in concern as Henry and Langston make their way down the ramp, glaring at him.

With Cena's back turned, Christian sees his opportunity... but before he can hit the Killswitch, Randy Orton jumps from the crowd behind the announcer's table, and before anyone can react he slides into the ring from behind Christian, bowling him over with a thesz press and angry fists. When Cena turns to see this unfold, Langston strikes with terrifying speed, charging into the ring and blasting the Franchise with a shoulder block from behind. The referee, in the midst of chaos all around the ring, calls for the bell. This one's a no contest.

*****

After the bell is rung, Cena begins to fight back against Langston but ends up double-teamed by the World's Strongest Man and not even Cena can drive him away unaided. Meanwhile, Christian manages to push Orton off of him after the unpredictable face gets a thumb in his eye. Christian rolls out of the ring, grabs his title belt and keeps his distance, his eyes fixed on Orton.

Orton makes like he's about to chase his nemesis, but he pauses... and then bullrushes the two heels as they continue their single-minded beatdown! Langston doesn't even see the RKO coming and the relief of pressure is enough to give Cena a foothold, clubbing Henry with right fists until his grip loosens.

Henry drops to one knee, but Orton holds Cena back from going on the counterattack... and for good reason, as it becomes almost immediately clear that Henry has been barely fazed by Cena's burst of offense. He rises to his feet and seethes at the two men across the ring from him. The show of intimidation leaves yet another opening - Orton's too awed to notice Christian slide in from behind and clock him in the back of the head with his belt! Henry seizes his opportunity once more, charging Cena and driving him over the top rope to the outside. SMACKDOWN ends as Henry and Christian stand tall while Orton and Cena lie dazed in and out of the ring.

Basic Chunnel fucked around with this message at Jan 7, 2017 around 08:45

Senerio
Oct 19, 2009

Chat got your tongue?


Every thread. Like clockwork. A Mark Henry streak.

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Jenkem Delivery
Feb 8, 2005

Death created time to grow the things that it would kill

Senerio posted:

Every thread. Like clockwork. A Mark Henry streak.

If we had Henry we would have fed him to Steiner on the first show

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