- Jenkem Delivery
- Feb 8, 2005
Death created time to grow the things that it would kill
"Welcome to No Surrender! We get a shot panning around the Impact Zone as fans are ready for a night of amazing action from the hottest promotion in Professional Wrestling! Ladders are scattered about the ringside area in preparation for our opening match, a four way ladder match for a shot at the Tag Team titles at Bound For Glory. Let's not waste any time! Lynyrd Skynyrd blasts through the arena as #DEMBOYS THE BRISCOES come down to the ring, waving the stars and bars and shouting vaguely offensive things at the crowd! Next, we get the British Invasion decked out in the Union Jack. Prince Puma and Hernandez come down to the ring on low rider bikes to ""Low Rider"" by War. Finally, ""Faithless"" by Injected plays and we've got Future Shock! The four teams stand in their respective corners and stare each other down as the contract for the Tag Team Title Match at Bound For Glory is lowered in a case above the ring. All four teams glance at each other, then everyone looks over to Hernandez who towers above the rest of the competitors. Hernandez looks at everyone staring at him, confused for a moment. His face turns to a look of horror as all the other competitors rush over and simultaneously hit Hernandez with superkicks! Puma watches astonished as his partner crumples into a heap before the match! The bell rings and everyone starts brawling right off the bat!
Kyle O'Reilly starts off against Magnus, hitting the big Brit with a series of leg kicks. Magnus manages to fight through the pain and blasts Kyle with a European uppercut! Kyle staggers back through the ropes and stands up on the apron Magnus charges at him going for a lariat! Kyle gets his bearings and hops up, catching Magnus' outstretched arm and putting him in a rope-assisted armbar! Magnus howls in pain as Kyle wrenches on his arm. Douglas Williams runs over to help his partner and they pull Kyle up into a vertical position. Magnus turns around, preparing to powerbomb Kyle when Prince Puma leapfrogs Williams and hits Magnus and Kyle with a flying enziguri! Both men tumble to the outside as Puma goes for a quick follow up roundhouse to Williams, who ducks it and grabs Puma in a rear waistlock and goes for a German Suplex. Puma does a full backflip in mid air and lands on his feet. Williams shows off to the crowd, proud of his still sharp ring reactions when Puma leaps onto his shoulders from behind. POISONED RANA! Williams was't sharp enough! Puma turns around to get hit with a lariat from Jay Briscoe! The larger Briscoe brother immediately hits Puma with his signature jabs and floors him with a snap suplex!
Meanwhile the rest of the combatants have moved outside the ring and brawl back and forth. Hernandez slowly slides out of the ring, regaining his composure as he sees most of the folks responsible for superkicking the poo poo out of him. He picks up a ladder and chucks it into the melee! Bodies go flying! He picks up another and another, throwing them with little regard for aim! Satisified with his work at the sight of a tangle of bodies and ladders, he slides into the ring and whacks Jay Briscoe with a shoulder block, sending him to the outside. He checks on Puma who needs a moment to clear the cobwebs before giving the thumbs up. Hernandez turns around to see everyone getting to their feet and winks at Puma, pointing a thumb into the air. Puma nods and sprints towards the ropes getting a full head of steam as Hernandez turns his back to the outside and squats down a bit. Puma hops up and stands on Hernandez's shoulders, Puma facing the opposite way from Hernandez. Hernandez turns around, so that he faces the outside and Puma has his back to the wrestlers on the outside. What the hell are they doing. Puma steadies himself and HITS A MOONSAULT OFF HERNANDEZ'S SHOULDERS TO THE OUTSIDE! HE CRASHES THROUGH MULTIPLE COMPETITORS SENDING BODIES EVERYWHERE.
Hernandez goes outside and grabs a couple ladders and slides them into the ring. He quickly sets one up and heads for the briefcase when Doug Williams climbs up behind and grabs him in a rear waistlock! Williams german suplexes Hernandez off the ladder! The big man hits the canvas hard, shaking the ring and knocking the ladder over. Williams scrambles to his feet as Magnus slides in and both set to work getting the ladder up. They have the ladder set up when Magnus gets blasted with a superkick! Williams turns around to eat a roundhouse kick! Future Shock is in the ring! They climb the ladder when the Briscoes scramble up and start brawling with them! Prince Puma runs in and pushes the ladder over, sending all four men flying! Williams pops up and grabs Puma in a rear waistlock, Magnus bounces off the ropes and hits a big boot to the face of Puma as Williams snap german suplexes the Aztec warrior! The Briscoes and Future Shock attack the British Invasion! All six men are brawling as Hernandez staggers to his feet and goes for a big double lariat! The Briscoes manage to maneuver over and hit Hernandez with a double hip toss! Hernandez gets up to one knee to eat an Axe and Smash from Kyle, then a shining wizard from Cole! Magnus picks up the big man in a bear hug and nods to Williams, who climbs to the top rope and hits a diving european uppercut! Hernandez is out cold!
The Briscoes hit quick superkicks on Future Shock! They face off with the British Invasion and start throwing bombs! Jay hits a number of brutal right hands on Williams as Mark takes down Magnus with some of his signature redneck kung fu! Jay picks up Williams in a tiger driver position, and Mark springboards off the ropes, SPIKE JAY DRILLER!! Magnus tries to get his feet but is stopped with double drop kicks! Jay quickly scrambles up the ladder as Mark stands at the base, holding a kung fu stance as he prepares to take down anyone who'd interfere! Jay Briscoe pulls down the briefcase! The Briscoes win and will get a tag team title shot at Bound For Glory!"
Io Shirai comes down to the ring with the Hot Skyjin Wife for her title match with Mickie James. Io wears a cat-style lucha mask which she removes when she comes to the ring. Mickie comes down to the ring. We get intros and the match is under way! Io immediately goes for a roundhouse which Mickie ducks and counters with a sweep. Io gets taken down and Mickie goes for the STF but Io turns over and kicks Mickie's legs out, sending her sprawling into Io's guard. Io quickly transitions off her back into a crossface, trying to trap Mickie's arm but Mickie gets to the ropes! Io breaks the hold and both women stand up and circle each other, stalking and analyzing as they plan their next move. Mickie goes in for a collar and elbow tie up, Io reverses into a wrist lock but Mickie drops to her back and kips up, reversing into a throw, sending Io to the canvas. Mickie hits an elbow drop then a knee drop and goes for the cover: 1...2... No Io kicks out! Mickie works over Io over with a series of strikes, but Io comes in for a discus elbow and gets caught by Mickie with an arm trap neckbreaker! Mickie follows up with a lifting DDT and goes for the pin: 1...2.. Io barely gets a shoulder up! The Hot Skyjin wife screams out for io, trying to encourage her to get up and fight back.
Io manages to get up in the corner with the aid of the ropes and Mickie rushes in, going for a monkey flip! Io lands on her feet and spins around to catch Mickie with a vicious roundhouse kick! Io goes for the pin! 1...2... No, Io almost had it there! Io wastes no time in hitting Mickie with a leg kick, taking her base out from under her and following up with a kneebar! Mickie is in pain as Io wrenches hard on her leg, stretching the various ligaments and tendons in that left leg! Mickie manages to make her way to the ropes and Io breaks the hold, but barely lets Mickie stand up before hitting her with a dropkick, then a german suplex! 1...2.....Mickie barely gets a shoulder up in time! Io follows up with a standing shooting star press! 1....2...no Mickie again gets out of it! Mickie rolls to the outside to give herself a break, circling the ring and eying her opponent. Io screams at Mickie and tries to draw her back in! Mickie slides in and avoids the quick roundhouse kick from Io and hits the snapmare takeover, then sprints into the ropes and hits a low angle dropkick right to the back of Io's head! Mickie covers her....1...2....no Io kicks out! Mickie continues to work over Io with strikes and slams before Io gets the upper hand and uses a drop toe hold to put Mickie laying on the middle rope! Io sprints across the ring, bouncing off the ropes for momentum and hits a tiger feint kick! She drags Mickie towards the corner and motions for the moonsault! Io springboards to the top rope but the ref is distracted by someone, It's Sara Del Rey! Cheerleader Melissa pops up on the apron and cracks Io in the face with an elbow sending her tumbling off the ropes! Mickie manages to recover mere seconds before Io does, and sees her opponent dazed. The perfect opportunity! Mickie hits the Mick kick! Io crumples into a heap as Mickie goes for the pin: 1...2...3... Mickie James retains the TNA Knockouts Title!"
"Brother Pope D'Angelo Dinero comes out to Team 3D's theme music, wearing a Team 3D shirt and his trademark surgical mask and sunglasses, both emblazoned with ""3D"" in rhinestones. He makes the 3D hand gesture in the ring and awaits the champion. ""OLE OLE OLE....OLE....OLE!!"" El Generico's theme blasts through the impact zone as he comes down to the ring, high fiving various fans and posing for a picture with a couple of kids. Generico gets into the ring and gets up on the turnbuckles, posing with the title before handing it over to the ref. We get in ring introductions, it's Brother Pope vs. El Generico for the TV Title. The bell rings and we're underway! Pope and Generico circle the ring, sizing each other up before Generico goes in for a wrist lock and gets caught with a quick jab by the challenger. Pope nails a few more quick jabs then follows up with a roundhouse but Generico ducks the blow and goes for the Blue Thunder Bong right away! Pope spins out of the way and goes for a straight right but Generico has it scouted and grabs the arm then hits a quick Lucha Arm Drag! Both pop up and Pope goes for another but Generico again hits the arm drag! Both pop up again and this time Pope fakes the straight right, suckering Generico in for a left handed uppercut! The Champion is staggered as Pope goes for a Codebreaker but Generico catches Pope and drops him into a sitout facebuster! The Champ goes for a quick pin attempt but Pope kicks out at 2. Generico sends Pope into the ropes and hits a quick dropkick, sending the challenger towards the corner.
Generico climbs the turnbuckles and pumps the crowd up, then hits a moonsault! Pin attempt 1.....2...No Pope kicks out! Generico throws Pope into the corner and sprints over to follow up with the Yakuza kick! Pope ducks out of the way and Generico gets his leg stuck in the top turnbuckle. Pope quickly takes advantage by hitting a rope trap neckbreaker! He goes for a quick pin on Generico: 1....2...the champ kicks out! Pope throws Generico into the ropes and hits a sitout spinebuster then quickly transitions into the scissored armbar! Generico is in serious trouble here as he gets wrenched in half by Brother Pope! Generico howls in agony as he scoots his body to the side and gets a foot on the bottom rope! Pope holds on for a good chunk of the 5 count and finally lets go. Pope picks up Generico and hits him with a quick STO then sends him into the corner. He pulls his knee pads down and points to Generico who is slumped over the turnbuckles. Pope sprints and leaps at the Generic Luchador aiming to drive his knees right into the spine with the DDE but Generico comes to and drops down, rolling out of the ring! Pope collides into the turnbuckles and tumbles out on the other side of the ringpost from the champ! Generico dives throught the first and second turnbuckles and catches Brother Pope with a tornado DDT! He quickly rolls Pope back into the ring and sends him into the corner, following up with a Yakuza Kick! Pope staggers forward into the waiting arms of Generico for a Blue Thunder bong! Generico holds him down for the pin: 1...2...3! El Generico retains the title!"
"Team 3D comes out to their regular theme music, carrying a couple of tables. Beer money comes down with a couple of steel chairs and a big ice chest full of tasty beverages. We get in ring intros for the No Disqualification championship match and the bell rings. We are underway! Storm and Roode immediately start whipping beer cans at Team 3D! Bully Ray and Bully Devon take a few shots and let out a yell, picking up a table and using it as a shield to bullrush their opponents, knocking them down! Bully Devon grabs Storm and throws him to the outside while Bully Ray brawls with Roode. Bully Ray hits Roode with a series of right hands then a powerslam. Ray goes for a quick pin: 1...2... Roode kicks out.
Meanwhile Devon throws Storm into the barricade. Storm quickly recovers and hits Devon with a knee to the midsection. Storm goes for a pump kick but Devon catches the blow, but Storm follows up with a quick enziguri! Devon staggers and Storm follows up with a quick snap suplex on the outside! He picks up Devon and sends him crashing into the apron! Storm tries to follow up with a high knee but Devon barely evades him and follows up with a bionic elbow! Storm staggers back, giving Devon an opening to blast him with a kick of his own. Devon takes a moment to recover from the suplex then grabs Storm by the arm and tries to send him into the ringpost, but Storm reverses! Devon crashes face first into the steel post and crumples into a heap. Storm slides into the ring and clubs Bully Ray over the back, giving the assist to his Tag Team partner!
Storm helps Roode up and both men nod at each other and give a beer drinking hand gesture then proceed to hit alternating chops on Bully Ray! Ray staggers into the ropes but Beer Money isn't about to let the man from D-ville get away! Roode hits a powerslam on Bully Ray and both men hit alternating elbow drops onto Ray. Both men pick Ray up and send him into the ropes. Roode picks him up and goes for the spinning spinebuster, right into a double knee backcracker from Storm! Roode goes for the pin: 1.....2....DEVON BARELY BREAKS UP THE PIN! Bully ray slinks away towards the cooler as Devon uses the element of surprise to hit a double lariat! Ray helps himself up and runs over to start stomping on the prone Storm while Devon is in a full mount on top of Roode and pounding away on the Canadian. Ray sets up Storm and wipes his wet hands off on Storm's back, then hits him with a piledriver! Devon hits a lifting inverted DDT on Roode, then kicks him out of the ring. Ray grabs Storm's legs and spreads them, pointing at Devon then at the top rope. Devon nods and goes up, both brothers look at each other and yell ""WASSSSUPPPPP"" then Devon hits a diving headbutt into Storm's dick! (What is this, 2000? Who the hell says wasssuppp anymore?) Ray points to Devon. ""DEVON.....GET THE TABLE!!"" He shouts. It's time to take a ride to D-ville folks! Devon meticulously sets up the table as Ray picks up Storm. He sends Storm into the ropes and they hit the 3D on Storm through the table!
Devon is about to go for the pin when Roode runs in and pulls him away from his partner! Bully Ray sneaks up behind Roode and spins him around, then opens a shook up can of beer right in Roode's face! Stinging foam sprays Roode in the eyes and he screams in agony! He's blind! ""Devon, set up another loving table!"" Bully Ray screams. Devon sets up another and both men hit the 3D on a blinded Roode! Bully Ray casually saunters over to the cooler and grabs a couple of beers. Both men go for the pin on Roode and crack open a couple of cold ones! 1....2....3! TEAM 3D ARE YOUR NEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS! Team 3D takes their belts and dump the rest of their beers over the fallen former champions, then dump the rest of the ice chest over them! They leave Beer Money on ice as they head up the ramp celebrating their victory!"
"Next is Austin Aries vs Alex Shelley. Shelley comes down to the ring and awaits the champion. Aries comes down the ramp with his trademark aviators, calling various members of the Impact Zone cucks and betas. Aries climbs into the ring, handing off his title and watching Shelley with a confident smirk. We get in ring intros for the Championship match and the bell rings! Aries starts off strong, not letting Shelley have a minute to breathe before he’s on him again. Shelley attempts a preemptive counter to The American Alpha’s moonsault, only for A-Quadruple to jump down from the rope instead. Shelley is tough, but Aries is more cunning. Shelley whips Aries into the ropes, only for Aries to kick him on the rebound. Before Shelley can even react, Aries whips him into the corner, and runs to the other corner, pauses to yell at an audience member for being a beta cuck, and then runs at Shelley for the IE--No! Shelley dodges, Aries kicks the ringpost instead!
Shelley looks down at the stunned Aries, and the momentum shifts his way! Before Aries can get his bearings, Shelley is on him, paying him back for every hit. Aries plan clearly didn’t account for getting hit in the face, and it shows. Shelley grabs Aries and hits a Sliced Bread #2 on him!
1...no! Aries kicks out. Shelley seemed to have planned for this, as he doesn’t even look at the ref, already back on Aries. The two trade fists, forearms, and elbows, each man trying to show the other who is the true Alpha male! Aries swings at Shelley, who ducks and picks him up for the WA4!! Aries tries to escape, but Shelley hits it! He doesn’t even attempt a pin, instead picking him up again for a second, but no! His grip slips! Aries lands on his feet!
Taking advantage of this momentary lapse, Aries hits a discus elbow on the shocked Shelley, knocking him to the canvas. Wasting no time, Aries goes for the False Flag! Shelley struggles, but has no choice but to tap out to the False Flag! The American Alpha is still the X-Division Champion!
"Before Shelley even leaves the ring, Aries has a microphone in his hands. “Now EVERYONE knows that this snowflake here’s talk is just that--talk. I am the one true Alpha in this company, but I’m feeling generous because that match was easy. Any of you betas in the audience can come in here and get a free shot at me. It’s the closest any of you libtards will ever get to a true Alpha. I can take each and every one of you whiny--”
He can’t finish the sentence, before an audience member in a Sting mask slides into the ring. Aries turns around and gets chopped in the chest! Aries stumbles back as the masked figure hits him with another brutal chop! Aries is knocked him out of the ring, tumbling to the floor. He looks up shock, as the figure stares down on him, and takes off the mask to reveal...... EDDIE EDWARDS! Edwards stares down at Aries, pointing at the title, and his theme plays as Aries scrambles back up the ramp, fear in his eyes."
Hogan, Abyss, Jarrett, and Gunner come out to Immortal's theme music and get in the ring. Hogan grabs a microphone, smirking as he is surrounded by his boys. "So I guess Bischoffo was too much of a loving coward to show up and face us after his bullshit this past week. He didn't even show up to the arena tonight! He and the Hardys ran down to Mexico with their tails between their legs like the little bitches they are." The rest of the gang laugh and share various profanities which are picked up by the mic. "So I'm running the loving show tonight! And that means we're going to call out some unlucky saps to get their asses kicked by Double J and Abyss! They haven't had a match in a couple weeks and they need to stay fresh so that IF, and that's a big IF Bitchoffo and his Hard on Boys come back they'll be sharp and ready to kick their asses. Eric Young, Crimson! GET YOUR WORTHLESS GINGER ASSES DOWN HERE TO GET A loving BEATDOWN BROTHER!"
Eric Young and Crimson come down to face Abyss and Jarrett. The match is really more of a handicap match as Gunner periodically interferes, and Hogan orders the Ref not to issue the disqualification. Abyss, Jarrett, and Gunner work over both Young and Crimson for a bit. The Ginger Boys eventually get some momentum back and manage to send Gunner out of the ring before turning their attention to the actual match participants. Crimson hits an exploder on Jarrett as Young hits Abyss with a piledriver. Young goes to the top rope for a Moonsault on Jarrett as Crimson pounds on Abyss. Gunner recovers and pushes Young off the top rope, sending him sprawling him to the outside! Hogan slides a guitar into the ring and Jarrett hits the kabong on Crimson! Abyss follows up with a Black Hole Slam and both stand over the fallen Crimson for a pin: 1...2....3! Immortal win! Hogan celebrates by taunting the crowd and taunting the Ginger Boys for not having souls.
"Mr. Anderson comes down the ring ready for his match against Joe. His signature lead pipe is noticeably absent as he waits his opponent. Samoa Joe comes out with Okato and both men pose at the top of the ramp for a quick pop then Joe sprints down to the ring! He slides in and goes after Anderson, who quickly escapes to the outside! Anderson yells at Joe to get the gently caress back so he can get in! The two trade insults and profanities before the ref managers to get Joe back to his corner while Okato and Anderson trade some profanities. Anderson finally gets into the ring and the ref motions for the bell! He barely has time to turn his head away from the timekeeper's area as Joe sprints and hits a flying enziguri on Anderson! Anderson stumbles back to the corner and eats a number of precision strikes in quick succession. Joe is loving furious! Anderson manages to sneak a knee in to Joe's gut and get some breathing room. He feints the roundhouse kick, causing Joe to go for the block then hits him with a straight left followed by an enziguri! Anderson seems to have upped his striking game in preparation for this match! He goes for a quick pin: 1...no Joe kicks out! As both fights get to their feet Anderson goes for a kick to the inside of Joe's left thigh, sending a loud smack of shin on flesh throughout the arena! Joe winces and steps back, giving Anderson just enough room to hit a quick dropkick to the same leg! Joe hits the mat and Anderson goes for a knee drop but Joe rolls out of the way on pure instinct. Anderson hits the mat hard and Joe follows up with a quick elbow strike from the kneeling position.
Anderson goes down and Joe goes for the Coquina Clutch but Anderson is too close to the ropes and manages to get a foot on them to break the hold. Both men are stood up by the referee and go back at it! Anderson fakes a leg kick and goes for a lariat but Joe ducks and spins behind Anderon and grabs him for the head and arm suplex! Joe goes for the pin: 1...2.. Kick out! Anderson staggers back as Joe swarms him with more strikes. Anderson ties up with Joe and hits him with a couple of quick knees in the clinch then follows up with a powerslam! Anderson takes advantage and immediately picks up Joe and goes for the buckle bomb! The big man shakes the ring with the impact then stumbles forward right in front of the turnbuckle! Anderson goes to the top rope and motions for the Kenton bomb! He dives off the top turnbuckle but Joe rolls out of the way! Anderson hits the canvas hard as there's no water in the pool. Joe hits a big boy senton on Anderson then picks him up and puts him on the top turnbuckle! He's going for the muscle buster! Anderson has just enough awareness to rake Joe's eyes! Joe staggers back and Anderson high tails it out of there! Okato checks on Joe as Anderson sprints up the ramp and heads backstage! The ref counts Anderson out and awards Joe the victory, but Joe doesn't seem terribly happy as him arm is raised. Joe is the winner!"
"Kazarian and Daniels come out, getting in the ring and shouting at the entranceway, taunting Sting and Styles. Both come out at the same time, fist bump at the top of the ramp then come down to the ring. Both men get in and Kaz and Daniels immediately begin attacking them! The bell rings and the match begins. Kaz and Daniels toss Sting out of the ring, then throw Styles into the ropes. Kaz his him with the lariat and Daniels goes low for the chop block! BAD ELIMINATION! Kaz goes for the pin while Daniels goes to the ropes to keep Sting from running in. 1...2...Styles kicks out! Kaz is shocked! Daniels is distracted as he turns, expectin the bell and Sting pulls him to the outside then sends does a huge Irish Whip, sending Daniels into the barricade! I guess Styles and Kaz are legal.
Styles gets up and hits a quick forearm to Kaz, them sends him into the corner and follows up with a leaping elbow strike! Kaz staggers out and AJ hits him with the dropkick! AJ goes for a quick pin: 1.....2... no Kazarian kicks out. AJ gets up and hits Kaz with a savate then enziguri kick! He pulls Kaz up and blasts him with a chop, and gets a forearm in return! Both men trade forearms in a show of fighting spirit! Styles finally hits a forearm, then a back elbow, then a pele kick! Phenomenal combo! Kazarian is down! Styles goes to the apron and looks to the crowd, they're ready! SPRINGBOARD 450 SPLASH! 1....2...Daniels breaks up the pin! Sting comes in to fight off Daniels as all four men brawl in the ring! Kazarian and Daniels manage to get the upper hand and knock Sting to the outside. Daniels gets outside for a quick tag from Kazaran and immediate hits a shotgun dropkick on Styles!
Daniels follows up with a series of quick elbow drops and continues to work Styles over. Daniels manages to dominate Styles until he gets hit with a surprise enziguri! Styles tags in Sting! Sting hits Daniels with a knee, then sends him into the corner for a Stinger splash! Sting goes for the pin: 1...2...No! Sting works over Daniels for a bit and gets him in a sleeper, but Daniels reverses it into a Koji Clutch! Sting manages to make it to the ropes, breaking the hold. Daniels tags in Kazarian who hits Sting with a jumping high kick then follows up with a series of leg drops and goes for the pin: 1.....2...no Sting kicks out! Sting manages to counter a spring board back elbow with a drop kick! Both men struggle to their corners and tag in their respective partners. Styles hits a flying dropkick on Daniels, then a rope assisted enziguri on Kazarian! Styles hops through the ropes and waits for Daniels to get to his feet....SPRINGBOARD ELBOW STRIKE! HE CALLS THAT THE EXCEPTIONAL ELBOW! Styles goes for the pin 1....2....3..Sting and Styles are your winners!"
"And now for our main event, Finals of The Best at Super Hossing Tournament (presented by Hoss' Loaded Burgers. It aint a burger, unless it's a HOSS LOADED BURGER). Steen comes out first, stopping at ringside to give his son Owen a hug and gets in the ring. Steiner comes down and yells at Owen, then gets into the ring. Both men take cursory glances at the trophy, then stare each other down. It seems like a little more personal than your average tournament match between two men who have never wrestled before. Steiner laughs at Steen, pointing to his midsection ""You think your fat rear end stands a chance against me? You've never faced a real man like me before!"" The bell rings and Steen circles him, Steiner comes in for a quick lariat but Steen sidesteps him and hits the superkick! Steen gets in some offense, hitting Steiner with a series of suplexes before putting him in a headlock and taunting Steiner ""You can't do poo poo, old man! I'm going to beat your rear end in front of all these people!""
Steiner groans and fights his way out of the headlock, using a half nelson transition to get a headlock of his own. Steen gets to the rope to break the hold but as soon as they stand up Steiner hits a belly to belly suplex. Steen quickly gets up and counters with an exploder suplex of his own! Steiner hits a german suplex on Steen, who gets right back up and hits a half and half suplex on Steiner! Steiner immediately gets up and hits Steen with a dragon suplex, who gets right up and hits Steiner with the Steen breaker! Steiner gets up and smiles at Steen ""Is that all you've got? I'm going to make you bleed in front of your kid and all these white trash and rednecks!"" Steen goes for a superkick but Steiner ducks and levels Steen with a Steiner line! Steiner sends Steen into the ropes and goes for the shoulder block but Steen stands firm! ""Looks like my fat rear end is too big for you take down old man!"" He doesn't even give Steiner a chance to reply and blasts him with a right hand! Steiner staggers back and Steen sends him into the ropes then hits a high back body drop! Steen goes for the pin: 1...2... no Steiner kicks out! Steiner slides out of the ring to recover but Steen follows quickly behind. Steen sprints on the apron and hits Steiner with a soccer kick, then comes back and follows up with a senton off the ring apron! Steiner goes down and Steen pops up, pointing to the apron! He's going for the Papa Powerbomb on the apron! Steen puts Steiner's head between his legs, but Big Poppa Pump reverses it into a back body drop, sending Steen spine first onto the apron! Steiner picks Steen up and rolls him into the ring and goes for the pin: 1....2...No Steen gets a shoulder up!
Steiner works steen over with a series of stomps and goes for the Steiner recliner but Steen manages to get to the rope! The ref breaks the two fighters up and Steen bullrushes Steiner with a dropkick followed up by a big boy senton! Steen goes for the cover: 1...2....Steiner kicks out! Fatigue is beginning to set in for both men as they struggle to their feet. They trade a series of hard rights back and forth, sweat and spit flying across the ring as the men exchange blows! Steen ducks a Steiner right and catches Big Poppa Pump in a fireman's carry. DEEP SEA DIVERTICULITIS!!! Steen stumbles to the ropes and points at Owen, sweat pouring down his face as he calls out to his son. ""THIS IS FOR YOU BUDDY! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!"" he shouts, as his son yells something back the microphones don't quite pick up. Steen turns around and STEINER SURPRISES STEEN WITH A BOOT TO THE GUT! Steen doubles over in pain as Steiner hooks both arms, BUTTERFLY FLOAT OVER SUPLEX! Steiner quickly takes Steen's back and spreads Kevin's arms over his legs, HE'S GOT HIM IN THE STEINER RECLINER!! Steen reaches towards the ropes and his son, his face turning a dark shade of crimson as Steiner wrenches back on his neck. The ref is right there, checking on Steen to see if he submits. Steen gurgles, spit bubbling on his lips as he fights towards the ropes but Steiner uses his strength and weight to pull back and stop Kevin's momentum. Steen's eyes are watering as his arm starts to go limp. ""Oweennnnnn......"" he gasps. The ref shakes Steen's arm and yells at Kevin and gets no response. STEEN IS OUT! THE REFEREE CALLS FOR THE BELL! BIG POPPA PUMP WINS THE BEST AT SUPER HOSSING TOURNAMENT AND A TITLE SHOT AGAINST STING AT BOUND FOR GLORY!!!
Steiner flexes and poses over Steen as he slowly regains consciousness with the referee and ringside doctor checking on him. Big Poppa Pump grabs the BASH trophy and hoists it with one arm, flexing with the other. The camera cuts to Owen Steen, his face buried in his hand as he sobs. Steen finally regains his senses and rolls out of the ring, going to comfort his son as he looks up and glares daggers at Steiner as Big Poppa Pump hurls a few insults at Steen, then goes back to posing as we cut away from the Impact Zone...."
"The screen cuts to blackness. Off in the distance....a faint light slowly approaches the camera. As the light grows we see a few shapes illuminated in flickering torchlight. As they approach we can make them out, it's Enrico Bischoffo flanked by the Hardys! Mattanza and Jeff each hold a torch as the trio makes their way through a maze of twisting stone corridors. ""Will it work? We've come all this way and left the Impact Zone in Hogan's control. We're taking a huge risk just being here."" Jeff asks. Bischoffo smiles ""The priests assured me, it will work. Did you think I'd come here just on a whim?"" Jeff nods ""Have faith, brother. The Aztec gods will be appeased, and will reward us"" Mattanza responds , his voice growly and muffled by the heavy mask. They finally reach a huge circular chamber lit by a ring of torches. A number of men in Aztec clothing surround a giant stone pit. ""Listo?"" Bischoffo asks. One of the men nods and motions to the others. They begin chanting in unison, surrounding the giant pit and gesturing.
Bischoffo nods to the Hardys who go stand against a wall, each one holding a hand over a button. The priests continue to chant, their voices rising in a crescendo of ancient Nahuatl. Bischoffo points to Mattanza, who presses a button. Suddenly a stream of something begins to drip from the ceiling. After a few seconds the drops become a trickle, then a stream, then a torrent! As the liquid rushes down we get a close up..is that....blood? The voices rise to shouts, the priests begin dancing around the pit, shouting to the heavens. Bischoffo's face contorts to a look of unbridled glee. He points to Jeff. ""AHORA!!"" he shouts. Jeff presses the button and suddenly a stream of sunlight pours in through the roof! The chants rise to a deafening roar. Bischoffo is now screaming along with them raising his arms as the pit of blood begins to bubble. Suddenly, a hand shoots out of the pool and grabs the side, then another. A figure pulls itself out of the pit, illuminated by the sunlight and covered head to toe in blood. We are unable to make out the exact features but we can tell it is a very wide, muscular man. He opens his eyes, blinking a couple times and scanning the chamber. Bischoffo cackles, his face a mask of unhinged, unadulterated glee as he takes in his new weapon of violence. "I'll be a son of a bitch....."
A B- show!
Jenkem Delivery fucked around with this message at Apr 29, 2017 around 18:53