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Happyman
Jul 20, 2011

Say, do you take your mask off when you go to the bathroom?



September, Week 1 - Calgary, Alberta, Canada

Henry is backstage with Corey Graves and a severely beat-up Langston in a neckbrace. He wants to know who dares to do that, and to find out tonight. Langston says it's someone he doesn't know. Graves suspects someone close to Cena. Henry wants answers, not suspicions, and threatens to run through the entire roster if he doesn't get answers.

---

Dean Ambrose defeats Jinder Mahal by pinfall.

---

Bret Hart comes into to the ring with Natalya to a massive hometown ovation. He congratulates her on her title win, but notes he is worried about her ego and aggression. Natalya calls him a hypocrite. Alicia Fox comes out and calls Natalya disrepectul. The two engage in verbal sparring until Bret has to hold Natalya back from starting a fistfight.

---

Sin Cara returns from injury and pins Wade Barrett in a non-title match.

---

Sheamus defeats Hunico by pinfall. Christian on commentary.

After the match, Christian orders both wrestlers to clear the ring. He proceeds to cut a promo until he notices Sheamus is still in the ring. Sheamus gets a mic and declares that he deserves a title shot. Christian agrees, and then hits him with the belt.

---

Beth Phoenix defeats Kaitlyn by pinfall, then cuts a promo about desiring challenge from the women's roster.

---

Daniel Bryan defeats Ezekiel Jackson by submission. Cody Rhodes is late again and fumes at ringside.

DBry demands to know why Rhodes tried to interfere last week. Rhodes explains he was late to answer the challenge and got angry. DBry reminds that if someone else wins, they won't honor the open challenge and he'd lose out entirely on the briefcase. Rhodes doesn't care, that if he doesn't get the briefcase then neither of them will.

---

Cena comes out to the ring. Randy Orton is abducted backstage by a big red hand out of nowhere as Orton's music hits for his match.

Orton's music is cut and replaced with Kane's. The match is hotswapped to Cena v Kane. They fight until Henry's stable comes out to the arena. They both stop, weakened, as Henry and lackies encircle the two. Kane then slips out of the ring leaving Cena to fend for himself.

---

Henry and co. beat down Cena until Ambrose comes to his rescue with a kendo stick and helps Cena fight off their opponents. They clear the ring, and Langston points to Ambrose as the guy who attacked him. They withdraw, but promises are made for retribution.

B

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Happyman
Jul 20, 2011

Say, do you take your mask off when you go to the bathroom?



Good evening marks! We're back with Prograps Unlimited #5!

News:

- Rob Van Dam's TNA contract is up and not being renewed. TNA was in the process of sending him to rehab, but that's not happening now.

- Relatedly, a former world champion in WWE has just been acquired by TNA. No word on when his debut show is, but expect it soon.

- Triple H's return as an authority figure appears to be a vehicle for a full in-ring return. Come CM Punk's return, a WrestleMania program between them is being discussed. HHH's last televised match was a loss against Undertaker at WrestleMania 27.

Ratings:

SmackDown: 3.83 (+0.48)
RAW: 3.54 (-0.24)
Impact: 1.01 (+0.03)

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

You're tense, I'm calm. You apply excessive force, I
*snap*
OHHHH HECKUMS


Oh no, we're actually the B show now

Luigi Thirty
Apr 30, 2006

Emergency confection port.


Realism.

aperion
May 15, 2007


I'm sorry I didn't have time to do the full write-up for smackdown this time. I'll have more time this weekend to do the upcoming episode. It helps that it has a personal favorite segment I've been excited to see start up.

aperion
May 15, 2007


September week 2

WELCOME TO


quote:

A strange occurrence in Witchita as the show begins. What was a simple broom closet has become something otherworldly. An ominous red glow and smoke is seen bellowing out of the sides of the door. Then the door abruptly shoves itself open! Out of the smoke, Randy Orton staggers out and collapses to the ground and the door shuts behind him. He slowly picks himself up and looks around, his eyes unfocused and his beard showing a week's worth of unmitigated growth.

A cameraman sets his camera down and attends to Orton, asking if he's okay and if he needs a medic. He shakes his head, and asks where he is. Witchita, Kansas, apparently. Orton picks himself up and starts to stagger away. The cameraman asks where he's been.

"Hell,"" he tells the man. ""And now I'm going after the guy who put me there,"" Orton responds. He takes a few more steps, then asks another question: ""Where's the changing room? I need a shower.""

The man points him in the right direction, but then looks at the wisps of smoke coming from the broom closet Orton was ejected from. He opens it up, but it's just a closet again with no trace of why Orton was in there to begin with."
The show begins with a Women's Division match between the recent signee AJ Lee and Tamina Snuka. The two spend a decent amount of time going at each other before AJ lands her recently-named Black Widow submission and forces Tamina to tap.

---

After the warmup match, the crowd boos Christian as he makes his entrance, hoisting the World Heavyweight Championship belt over his head. His opponent tonight is Ezekiel Jackson, the former Intercontinental Champion. The two of them start off much as expected with Christian engaging early offense, but Jackson fends him off, using his larger size and strength to his advantage and with several body slams puts Christian in the ineviable position of being forced to kick out of several attempts to put him away.

But also as expected, Christian manages to recover enough to slip out of the ring and force Jackson to chase him right into a trap: Christian slams Jackson into a ringpost, then a barricade, then tosses him back into the ring. Christian softens Jackson up a bit more and sets him up for a Killswitch. But right before he can hit it, a familiar music hits. Christian lets Jackson go as he expects Sheamus to enter from the ramp. But Sheamus comes in from the crowd and blindsides him with a Brogue Kick! The bell is rung, and Jackson is disqualified; he backs out of the fight between the Champion and the Celtic Warrior. Christian rolls out of the ring before Sheamus can do more to him, and retrieves his belt, withdrawing to the ramp. Sheamus can be heard saying he's gonna do the same at Night of Champions. Christian hoists his belt above his head as Sheamus's music hits and the show goes to commercial.

The announcers confirm that Christian and Sheamus will be going head-to-head at Night of Champions for the World Heavyweight Belt as the commercials end and the show begins. For now, in the ring are Heath Slater and Trent Baretta. The match is fairly uneventful and Slater ends up the winner after landing a jumping neckbreaker on Baretta.

---

Up next on the evening's series of matches are Beth Phoenix and Kelly Kelly. Although both performers give a decent run, Beth Phoenix is the inevitable winner after landing the Glam Slam, and the Glamazon puts Kelly away. However, there seems to be a bit of hesitation in her accepting the win as she looks back at Kelly. Matt Striker notes that Phoenix didn't employ some of her nastier moves and it almost seem as if it were a mercy to Kelly.

Backstage, Natalya watches the commentary and shakes her head, hoisting the Women's title on her shoulder. An interviewer attempts to approach her, but she doesn't let the woman do her job and abruptly leaves with a hand shoving the reporter out of the way.

---

The announce team makes mention that some people not in action tonight are John Cena and Mark Henry's stable. As if on cue, John Cena is seen in street clothes in the locker room. He is catching up some business on his phone when he is approached by the young Xavier Woods with an earpiece, also on his phone. He appears to be coordinating with whomever is on the other line as he taps Cena on the shoulder to get his attention.

Xavier introduces himself, then says that he's on the line with The Rock and that he's been asked to deliver a message. He starts reciting a recipe in a deadpan and monotone expression, something about chicken and getting pasta going as well as making a from-scratch sauce. Cena interrupts him as he starts to look impatient then asks: ""What the hell is this?"" he asks the young man.

Xavier then says: ""He's asking what this is. Uh-huh. Uh-huh,"" he acknowledges the man on the other side of the conversation. ""He says it's chicken alfredo over fettuccine with cherry tomatoes,"" he tells Cena.

""Yeah, I get that. Why are you telling me this?""

""Because....yeah? Yeah, yeah yeahyeah, okay,"" Xavier again confers with The Rock over the phone, then announces, once again in a deadpan expression: ""Because The Rock wants you to smell what he's cooking for you right now.""

Cena scoffs, shakes his head looking disgusted and walks off-camera. Xavier follows him, continuing to recite the recipe as the show cuts to commercial.

---

Booker T confirms for the audience that The Rock was indeed sending a message to Cena, to not forget about him and their upcoming match at WrestleMania 28, because he hasn't forgotten, and neither should you! That said, the next match, between two heaveweights: Kane and Kozlov.

Kane, with only his second match back since injury, shows no signs of ring rust as he initially runs over Kozlov. However, as the two of them take the fight out of the ring, the match slows down significantly. Unfortunately, the two of them seem to drag the match on for entirely too long as the crowd seems to lose interest in them, and even some restless chants go out.

Towards the end, after a failed attempt at a Chokeslam, Randy Orton's music hits, and he comes strolling out of the front entrance into the arena. Kane shoves Kozlov out of the way and exits the ring to confront Orton. However, that proves to be a signficant mistake, as Orton beats on Kane then hits a quick RKO. The match is disqualified and Orton stands tall over Kane. Orton then kicks Kane a few more times for good measure.

---

Cameras switch back to the announce team who discuss the Orton interference briefly, and that General Manager Teddy Long is already penciling in a match between Kane and Orton at Night of Champions, thought the motivations for Kane going after Orton remain unclear. Booker T then switches over to Josh Matthews, who did a recent interview with Natalya about her title run under a unified women's roster. They cut to that interview.

Natalya is gracious in her agreeing to do the interview, though a bit smug about how things are going right now. She says that she enjoys running over the entire roster all at once, and no it doesn't get old. Nattie understands just how much fun it is to tear other people apart, and admits it's a little addictive in some ways. The interviewer changes it up to Beth Phoenix, and notes that Natalya has been paying attention to the Glamazon. Natalya acknowledges she has, because Phoenix is the closest thing to actual competition she has.

But Natalya seems to be disappointed. Phoenix could become real competition if she were more aggressive. Instead, she's just a bulked-up wanna-be who isn't willing to take advantage of her own gifts to stand on her own two feet right now. Although she doesn't want to give away any secrets to her would-be competition, that aggression is the key to being a true champion. The interviewer asks if it's about 'ruthless aggression', but Natalya laughs. No, in fact it isn't: it's about being smart with her competition, and not giving any edge away, and making them respect and fear you. Ruthless aggression is just another phrase for being stupid. Natalya smiles and thanks Josh for his time, but even though he has more questions, the interview is now over because she says it is.

---

Daniel Bryan's Money in the Bank Briefcase Open Challenge begins again, and this time....it's Tyson Kidd who answers the call! Shortly after he enters the ring, the Undashing music hits, and Cody Rhodes enters, once again too late. He fumes at ringside for his recurring mistake, but doesn't interfere tonight as Daniel Bryan takes apart his competition.

As Kidd is submitted after a half-decent match, Rhodes with mic in hand, demands Bryan's music be cut, and he demands a shot at that briefcase at Night of Champions. Bryan, retrieving a microphone of his own, agrees to a match, if only so he'll stop this nonsense of harassing him and the others about the open challenge, and to get Rhodes out of his way once and for all.

---

The Main Event begins, and it is between Wade Barrett and Sin Cara for the Intercontinental Championship! Although far smaller than Barrett, Sin Cara shows his stripes as an acrobatic wrestler are no mistake, and put the much larger Barrett on the ground several times. Barrett barely lands much offense to begin with as Sin Cara is entirely too fast for him, and this looks almost like a squash match.

That doesn't last forever, as Barrett finally hits Sin Cara with a clothesline, then another, then bounces off the ropes for a third, and slow the smaller acrobat down. They switch it up as they battle in the ring, then take their fight out of the ring, and Sin Cara appears to be in serious trouble as Barrett slams him into the Spanish Announce Table. However, he rolls the smaller man back in and tries for a three-count to no avail. After a severe headlock, Sin Cara managed to power out of Barrett's grip and land a missile drop kick on him into a corner. Sin Cara climbs the ropes, and lands an elbow right into Barrett's chest. Barrett rolls out of the ring, which turns into a costly mistake. Sin Cara bounces off the ropes for a Tope Suicina! But he isn't done yet, as he gets up on the top rope, then nails Barrett with a Moonsalt and takes them both onto the ground floor!

Sin Cara starts climbing up the ropes once more, but just as he reaches the top rope, Wade Barrett jars the ropes, causing Sin Cara to fall right into them, then hits the floor! Barrett then starts beating him senseless. The referee tries to ply Barrett off to no avail, and the ref calls for the bell, stopping the match. The announcer broadcasts that the referee has stopped the match due to Sin Cara being unable to defend himself. Medics are dispatched to the arena, but Barrett refuses to be done. He pops up Sin Cara onto his shoulders and powerbombs him into the floor! Then he pops him up again and powerbombs him into the Spanish Announce Table, which does not sell. However, the damage is done, and several more referees comes out to restrain Wade Barrett.

SmackDown ends with the sight of Sin Cara being wheeled out on a stretcher, and Barrett hoisting his title smugly above his head.

Overall the show got a B-, weighed down by several weak segments, but the standout of the evening was Xavier Woods and John Cena in a short but memorable segment leaving the crowd wanting more of The Rock's recipes.

DoctorGonzo
Jul 25, 2016

help theres rain coming from the sky and theres other racers on the track near me and slamming my brakes on breaks them ironically enough and why does my avatar keep getting worse



Smackdown Live is a great show.

Basic Chunnel
Sep 21, 2010

Jesus! Jesus Christ! Say his name! Jesus! Jesus! Come down now!



Great Smackdown, love the way it's going. I wish I had time to pitch in on booking but whenever I schedule out some time to take a look, something eats it up. If SD needs me to write up a match or segment, though, I can carve out some time. DM me in Discord if so

aperion
May 15, 2007


Basic Chunnel posted:

Great Smackdown, love the way it's going. I wish I had time to pitch in on booking but whenever I schedule out some time to take a look, something eats it up. If SD needs me to write up a match or segment, though, I can carve out some time. DM me in Discord if so

Thanks, I'll remember to do that. I need some help with booking Night of Champions -- it'll be my first PPV booking, but that's still got more than enough time before it has to go up.

Also, I'm still pissed that I missed out on working with Natalya more when the show was in Calgary. I would've thrown out everything to do a Hart Dungeon-themed show for the women's division.

Sanguinia
Jan 1, 2012

#RXT REVOLUTION~!
2000



future scoopin'...




Raw for September Week 2 posted:


Take Everything We Want! Take Everything In Sight!

***

Welcome everyone to the longest running weekly episodic television series in history! Monday Night Raw is live from Columbus, Ohio's Nationwide Arena! And out first is a big stretch limo pulling up next to the Titantron to the sound of trumpets. Vince McMahon and Universal Champion Alberto Del Rio step out to a chorus of boo's and CM Punk chants, and make their way to the ring.

Vince lets the crowd chant Punk's name for a minute, and then gets in: "You know, it amuses me that all these weeks later you keep on chanting that name. First he abandoned you, and sure he showed back up with a front row ticket and did a little grandstanding, but where is he now? Where is your precious hero now? I don't see him, do you? Where are your other heroes for that matter? Rey Mysterio? My... misguided son-in-law? I'll tell you where they are, they are pulled up the table eating a big plate of humble pie with a side of crow, just like each and every one of you! You all thought that if you just BELIEVED and CHEERED and all that other crap you do, that the Big Bad Boss would lose and you'd get a happy ending. Let me tell you something folks, happy endings are for winners, and Vince McMahon ALWAYS wins. Now, if we're done with fantasy, I'd like to treat you all to a dose of reality: Mexico's Greatest Export, The Aristocrat, The Universal Champion, Alberto Del Rio!" Vince leads his audience of one in a round of applause as the crowd jeers.

"Thank you, Mr. McMahon. You know, when I came to this country I didn't know if my greatness would be properly appreciated. I expected that I would have to take what by all rights should have been given to me. Main Event Matches, Championships, Money, Power, these things should have always been mine because they are my Destiny! But you, El Jefe... you already knew that. That's why you came to me, Senor De Nero El Banco, and asked to me remove this title from Rey Mysterio at all costs at Summerslam. Some people do not respect what it means to be a man of Destiny. Triple H and Rey Mysterio, they say I have to prove myself even though I owe perros like them NOTHING! But because of my endless greatness, I proved it anyway. I defeated Rey Mysterio once and for all, and I shut Triple H's mouth by doing it! Now, I stand before you, as Rey de Reyes! El Campeon Del Universo! ALBERTO DEL RIO! And I answer to only one man."

He hands the mic back to Vince, who's grinning like a madman. The Chairman just has one thing left to say: "I win. You lose. Get used to it." NO CHANCE IN HELL plays as they exit up the ramp.

***

The first match of the night was to determine a tag title shot at Hell in a Cell! It's Air Boom v Otunga and McGillicuty! Air Boom really took it to the champs to start the match, showing just how hungry they were for this after weeks of being ducked, but eventually Otunga and McG were able to take back control off a Double Suplex. Otunga went to work on Bourne with a long bout of mean-looking offense, and the crowd was really getting behind him as the man in peril, trying to will him the energy to get back into it and popping big for every kick and punch he managed to throw.

Finally, Evan countered a big corner splash into a Sunset Flip and dived halfway across the ring! Kofi got the tag and went strait into the corner, unloading on Otunga... only for Jack Swagger to rush the ring and hit both men with a double German Suplex! Drew McIntyre joined his partner, hitting Kofi with the Future Shock as Swagger put Otunga into the Ankle Lock! With both teams being attacked, the ref had no choice but to ring the bell and declare the match a no contest. The two jerks ran up the ramp before Bourne could get his hands on them. McGillicuty helped his partner out of the ring, but both men were clearly smiling at Evan and Kofi's visible frustration at being screwed.

***

Santino Marella continued his search for a new tag partner in Greece, where the greatest wrestlers of ancient history made their homes. He visits tourist hot spots dedicated to the Greek myths, and tells some fractured fairytales to the locals about Hercules, Achilles and others. He got another tip about that mysterious European Tag Wrestling master, so he's off to England!

***

Seth Rollins vs A Debut Talent! We return from commercial with the new guy, who's announced as CJ Parker. Cole mentions he's recently completed his training in FCW, but is cut off by the arrival of Rollins, flanked by Miz and Maryse. Rollins got in the ring as Miz joined commentary, where he spent the whole match talking up Seth Rollins accolades. Rollins backed up this praise in the ring with a dominate performance, and Curb Stomped Parker after just a few minutes to pick up the win. Rollins gloated as Miz noted that guys always talk about spoiling a hot prospect's debut, but Rollins actually got the job done.

***

In the locker room, Rey Mysterio is moping around on a bench when two golden hands get a little handsy with his shoulders. Goldust's gravely voices purrs some encouragement: "Rey, there's no need to be so down. Yes, its tragic that that dastardly Del Rio absconded with your gold, but for a man like you, titles come and go. The name Mysterio will blaze across the cosmos for a hundred years for all the great things you've done in this industry! You're a STAR, baby!"

Rey chuckles nervously and slips out of Goldust's grasp. "I appreciate that, man. But I picked a bad time to come up short. People are counting on me to stand up to Vince, and I didn't just fail, I lost to man without an ounce of honor."

Goldust shivers in apparent ecstasy at Rey's words, leaving the luchador plainly uncomfortable. "Ooooh, yes! Rey, you're so passionate. You have fire inside you, you just need something to bring the embers back up to a blaze! Watch my match tonight, in the Main Event. John Morrison and I are co-starring in a fantastic little vignette where we shatter the dreams of young Miz and Ziggler. I promise you, we'll show you something so that you never forget your passion... and you'll never forget the name *BREATH* Gooooooldust! Exit: Stage Left!" Goldust wanders out of the room, and Rey stares after him with an unreadable expression.

***

Derek Bateman v Local Jobber. The REAL Man came out with the Bellas to face some local talent who was already in the ring. The match went exactly as you'd expect, with Bateman taking out the Jobber in about four minutes, getting the finish once again with the "Mantastic."

***

After the match, Bateman continued the beating on the helpless jobber as the Bellas cheered him on. Jerry Lawler expressed disgust, reminding us how the Bellas have been having that man bully every person they come across since his debut for no reason. Cole asks if King of all people would not be doing whatever the Bellas asked if he were lucky enough to be in Bateman's "position," and King grumbles in response.

***

Zack Ryder v R-Truth! WHAT'S UP!? R-truth came out to his customary silence, ranting and raving at Little Jimmy as Ryder gave the hard camera a 'check-this-guy-out,' kind of look. Unfortunately this gave Truth a great opportunity to punch him in the mouth. The two Superstars had a very nice back and forth match after that initial exchange, which Ryder eventually won off hitting the Rough Ryder. The crowd needed this after a couple squashes, and were really getting behind Zach.

***

A tired and sweaty Zack grabbed a mic from ringside and shouted "WHERE ALL MY BRO'S AT!?" The crowd responded with a wave of 'Woo! Woo! Woo!' which had Zack grinning like a madman despite his heavy breathing. "Just a few weeks ago, I was spending every Monday Night cooling my heels in the locker room while guys like Truth were taking shots at the World Championship. From day one in this company, I believed with every fiber of my being that I had the stuff to be one of the greatest of all time. The only thing I ever wanted was a chance, and that was the only thing Vince McMahon refused to give me. But then YOU changed everything! Every night, no matter who was in this ring, even if it was Dwayne freaking Johnson, you all chanted 'We Want Ryder.'" The crowd echoes him, and Zack seems a little choked up. "I don't know if I can come through for you. I don't know if I can live up to the faith you've all put in me. But I promise you I'm gonna fight every night with every drop of blood in my veins! Zack Ryder will NEVER quit! WOO, WOO, WOO, YOU KNOW IT!"

***

What does Billionaire Playboy Kassius Ohno bring to table as a WWE Superstar? In his efforts to better himself, he's studied fighting techniques from all over the world, from Kickboxing to Krav Maga to Kung-Fu. But don't think this man's spends all his money on travel! As a renouned philanthropist, Ohno has dedicated large portions of his fortune to the renovation of his home city, bringing much needed jobs and new infrastructure to the city, as well as large donations to the care of local orphanages and foster programs. Whether he's fighting to make the world a better place in OR out of the ring, Kassius Ohno never quits! Coming Soon to Monday Night Raw!

***

ACE REPORTER Gregory Helms caught up with Bateman and Bellas backstage, and asks for some time. They told him to wait and take a few moments to primp and discuss how they will hype up Bateman in this exclusive interview. They turn back and tell him to ask away, so Helms asks if they know anything about Billionaire Playboy Kassius Ohno. Team 3-B looked disgusted and Bateman shoved the intrepid newsman into the closest wall before leading his ladies off! Helms looked confused and more than a little pissed.

***

Justin Gabriel is attempting to meditate backstage, but is clearly a bit perturbed and unable to completely calm himself. Scott Stanford finds him and asks him what's wrong. Gabriel launches into a rant where he calls out Miz for still being unable to beat him on his own. "He's put a little army between me and him, yeah? His new whipping boy Rollins and his girl Maryse, they'll do anything to protect their meal ticket, yeah? But they can't protect him from me. Not forever." He gets up and heads for the curtain with a purpose.

***

Justin Gabriel v JTG! The two agile superstars traded blows for a few minutes, though Gabriel had the upper hand for most of the match. Unfortunately JTG seemed to have some significant ring rust, as he failed to execute several offensive manuevers and had to be dragged into proper position by Gabriel when he didn't land properly off a second-rope bulldog. Mercifully after about eight minutes Gabriel put JTG away with the 450 splash. Perhaps when called about this match he should not have picked up his phone.

***

Air Boom confronts Johnny Ace about the interference in the contenders match, but they find the tag champs already in his office. John says that Otunga was just giving his the "Harvard Run-down," on the status of the Tag Division based on their match being no-contest. "You see boys, the wording of that match contract was very specific. It stipulated that the outcome of the match between us would be the absolute last word on the #1 Contendership for the Hell In The Cell Pay-Per-View. Which means that because the result was a 'No Contest,' they don't have to fight anybody."

Otunga holds up a novelty contract with a big NO CONTEST written in the challengers signature spot in what can only be Comic Sans font. He and McG share a big laugh as Laurinaitis puts on his most plastic smile, and wishes Kofi and Evan the best of luck in all future endeavors in the Tag Division. Air Boom promises that this is not over.

***

Richie Steamboat (w/ The Dragon) vs Rene Dupree! The 3rd Match of the Best of Seven series showed these two were starting to get to know each other's styles, with Rene providing several impressive counters to spots he ate dirt on in the first two matches. However, despite his rookie status Richie showed the same ability, countering several of Rene's signature spots. Rene didn't let himself become frustrated, and goaded Richie with some taunts, leading to a dust-up against the ropes which the ref was forced to break up. With the official and Richie distracted Rene unloaded a massive a low blow, and followed up with a schoolboy! 1! 2! 3! Dupree goes up 2-1, and gives Richie a painful lesson in the shortcuts a veteran might take in the ring.

***

HHH is stopped backstage by Scott Stanford, who asks the COO about Alberto Del Rio's decisive victory over Rey Mysterio. "Well Scott, I may not like Del Rio, I may not like what he had to say at the top of the show, but here's the thing: he did the one thing I was pretty sure he didn't have the cajones to do, and that's beat Rey Mysterio strait up without taking any shortcuts. He proved me wrong, and that's sort of caught me off guard in terms of what the title scene ought to look like, because frankly I wasn't almost 100% sure that today he would not be in it. So, I'm talking to the board, and we'll have an official announcement next week, right here on Raw, as to who will fight Alberto Del Rio for the Universal Championship at Hell In The Cell. And trust me, that announcement won't just be good... it'll be that. drat. Good."

***

Time for the Main Event! The Miz (w/ Maryse) and Dolph Ziggler (w/ Vikki Guerrero) v John Morrison (w/ Melina) and Goldust! The match stayed pretty even throughout, with plenty of tags in and out and all potential combinations of stars coming up roughly even in their clashes. Toward the latter half the heels got the edge when Ziggler raked Morrison's eyes keep control, and the Shaman of Sexy found himself on the receiving end of a quadruple team as Maryse, and Vicki lent a few covert chokes and slaps when the ref wasn't watching. Despite this onslaught Morrison continued to kick-out of every pin attempt, showing the guts of a Champion! Dolph's fury led him to go for his deadly Sleeper, but Morrison was able to desperately counter into the Moonlight Dive neckbreaker! Goldust roused the crowd to a fever pitch, sending their energy to Morrison so he could deliver the hot tag!

Goldust ran through both Miz and Dolph, dumping the Awesome One out of the ring with a back body drop and going back to work on Ziggler! Vikki and Maryse rushed to Miz's side to help him get back in the fight and save Ziggler... only for someone to jump the barricade and start laying into him! The announcers paniced over the seemingly psychotic fan until they recognized Justin Gabriel! The Cape Town Werewolf seemed to have gone rabid, laying into Miz without an ounce of mercy! He sets Miz up for a diving dropkick into the barricade, but at the last moment Maryse puts herself between her boyfriend and his attacker as a human shield. Conflicted over attacking a non-wrestler/woman, Gabriel retreats into the crowd.

Meanwhile, Ziggler has remained oblivious to to the drama, and is layed out by the Final Cut! Goldust tags in Morrison, who jump from Apron to Top Rope and rolls strait into the Starship Pain! One, two, three! Morrison pins the United States Champion! Melina comes into the ring and celebrates with Morrison and Goldust over the remains of their opponents at ringside to close out the show.

***

Overall Rating: B

Jenkem Delivery
Feb 8, 2005

Death created time to grow the things that it would kill



quote:

Show Opens with a Video Package for NO SURRENDER showing various storylines

**********************************

Cheerleader Melissa versus Tara. Melissa gets the upper hand quickly with a series of elbow strikes and suplexes. She hits an Air Raid crash on Tara and ties her legs up into a modified indian deathlock. Melissa bends Tara in half with the deathlock until she taps.

**********************************

Jeff Cobb versus Tony Nese. Cobb overwhelms Nese, tossing him around with a series of brutal suplexes before planting him with a deadlift german. Cobb points to the top rope and hits a shooting star press for the pin.

**********************************

We cut backstage and Samoa Joe and Okato storm into Enrico Bischoffo's office, angrily glaring at Bischoffo and the Hardys. Bischoffo smiles disarmingly from behind his desk. "Ahh, welcome boys. What can I do for you?" Joe glances to Okato, then over to Bischoffo "What can you do for me? It's pretty simple. Give me that piece of poo poo Anderson this Sunday" he snarls. "He cost me a shot at winning the BASH tournament and getting a shot at the title." Bischoffo leans back in his chair, tapping his chin thouightfully as he watched Joe intently. "Yes.....yes...I can see from the look in your eyes you plan on hurting Anderson, am I right?" Joe nods "I plan on breaking him in half. I plan on shoving that lead pipe up his rear end!" he yells, leaning over the desk. Bischoffo leans forward to Joe and points up at him. "Yes, yes I believe you! You've got it. You and Anderson at No Surrender!" Joe nods then turns to face the Hardys, Okato stepping up to his side as the four men stare each other down, before Joe and Okato leave.

**********************************

Beer Money and Die Generiese versus Team 3d (Devon, Bully ray, Brother pope)- This one never becomes a match, it's just an all out brawl that results in Roode going through a table, Bully Ray and Generiese bloody, and Brother Pope getting powerbombed through the timekeeper's area. Bischoffo comes out and announces that Devon and Bully Ray will face Beer Money at No Surrender in a No DQ match.

**********************************

Future Shock versus Jack Evans and Prince Puma. A back and forth match between the two young tag teams as they look to establish dominance in the very competitive TNA Tag Team Division. Cole and O'Reilly manage to avoid the flippy moves of Mexican America and keep them at bay with strikes. That changes when Puma hits a jumping rope assisted enziguri on O'Reilly, sending him down as Puma gets to the top rope and sets up the shooting star press. Puma goes for it but O'Reilly catches him in the triangle! Puma taps!

**********************************

The British Invasion storm the ring, followed by the Briscoes. Everyone stares each other down! Bischoffo's music hits. He comes out to the top of the ramp with a microphone. "Well, I see you all have quite a situation here. I have an idea on how to resolve this. You see, I am an expert at conflict resolution. The British Invasion, Future Shock, The Briscoes, and Mexican America will fight at No Surrender in a 4 way match for a shot at the Tag team Titles at Bound For Glory!" THe crowd lets out a loud cheer at that. "Oh yes, it will be a LADDER MATCH!!!!!" The crowd really likes it!

**********************************

Bischoffo comes down to the ring and invites Io, Mio, and The Hot Skyjin wife down. When they come into the ring he offers them a unique opportunity, turn in the knockouts tag belts to be retired for a shot at the knockouts title at No surrender. They reluctantly agree and hand over the Tag Team Titles. Oh but he said "a shot", singular. Io and Mio need to fight to determine who gets the shot. RIGHT NOW. RING THE BELL

**********************************

Io versus Mio Shirai. The action is dead even between the two as they fight it out, exchanging brutal strikes and suplexes. Both sisters know each other so well, it's difficult for one to get the upper hand on the other until Io blasts Mio with a head kick, staggering her. Io senses her window of opportunity to put away her sister and hits a series of roll through German suplexes into a pinning Dragon Suplex! Io wins!

**********************************

Ric Flair is in the ring for an interview with Kevin Steen, who sets aside a large picture of his son, Owen. "So Kevin, you face the biggest challenge of your career so far as you are going up against Big Poppa Pump this Sunday. What is going through your mind as you prepare for this match?" Steen rubs his beard "Well Ric, the #1 thing on my mind right now is to win this match for my son, Owen. He hates Big Poppa Pump with a passion. A lot of people here in the Impact Zone have misunderstood me. They've called me a sick man. They've called me a monster. But I'm just doing this to be a good role model and hero for my son." Flair nods "How are you preparing for the match? Big Poppa Pump is a seasoned veteran, he's got a number of tricks up his sleeve saved up from all these years of competing." Steen shakes his head "I'm a seasoned veteran too Ric, everyone forgets I've been doing this for over ten years! I'm ready for everything Steiner can throw at me. I've seen plenty in my time. I've wrestled legends, I know what it's like to step into the ring with someone who has decades of experience. I'm..."

Steen is cut off by Big Poppa Pump's music! Big Poppa Pump comes down to the ring and immediately kicks a hole through the picture of Owen Steen! Steen lunges towards Steiner but Flair gets in the middle of it, trying to keep the peace! Steiner grabs a mic and stares down Steen. "SCREW YOUR STUPID KID!" He snarls, pointing a finger in Steen's face. "You think because you faced some old geezers in some lovely gym somewhere in front of 50 white trash morons you're ready to face the Genetic Freak?! You're even dumber than your kid!" Steen's eyes go dead as Steiner insults his kid. A sick smile crosses his face as he listens to Steiner go on. "I'm gonna show you what it's like to step into the ring with a real legend. I've been in the ring with the best from this generation, from last generation, and the generation before that. AND I'VE BEATEN THEM ALL! I've held championships all over the world, I've won more tournaments than I can remember. This is no different! This is just gonna be another day punching the clock for Big Poppa Pump. And when I'm done, your kid and your wife are gonna be calling me Daddy!" Steen shoves Flair to the side and both begin brawling in the ring! Security has to come down and separate the two! The crowd is hot as hell! THIS SUNDAY AT NO SURRENDER, KEVIN loving STEEN VERSUS SCOTT STEINER!!

**********************************

Hogan storms into Bischoffo's office with Jarrett, Abyss, and Gunner. "God Dammit, we can't let Steiner get away with this bullshit! He's running around like he owns the place! We've got to do something about this!" Bischoffo leans back in his chair and glances at the Hardys, one over each shoulder. "Well Hogan, it sounds like you have something in mind already. What is it?" Hogan smiles "Hell yes I have something in mind, brother. Keep in mind I still own 50% of this worthless god damned company. Abyss and Jarrett vs. Steiner in a handicap match. They'll put Steiner in his place and show him that we're still in charge." Bischoffo nods. "Sounds good, just keep in mind I need Steiner to main event No Surrender on Sunday. So soften him up a bit, give us a nice display of violence. But remember, we need him to wrestle on Sunday. So don't go overboard." Hogan rubs his chin "Hmmm, I see your point. Even with that drat head injury you're still a smart man, brother." Enrico smiles "Thank you, and remember. Soften him up, teach him a lesson, but don't break anything."

**********************************

Abyss and Jarret with Hogan and Gunner ringside versus Scott Steiner. The bell rings and both the Monster and Jarrett immediately start beating down Steiner. It's an unrelenting assault as both men smash a variety of weapons over Steiner as he lays prone in the ring until the ref declares Steiner unable to continue and rings the bell. The beat down continues until Bischoffo's music hits! He comes down with the Hardys who get between Immortal and Steiner.

**********************************

Bischoffo screams at Hogan that he warned him not to go overboard. Hogan grins and steps up to get in Bischoffo's face. We get a stare down between Immortal, Bischoffo, and the Hardys! NO SURRENDER IS THIS SUNDAY FOLKS! ORDER TODAY!

Basic Chunnel
Sep 21, 2010

Jesus! Jesus Christ! Say his name! Jesus! Jesus! Come down now!



So is Big Poppa Pump refusing to job to Steen or what

Jenkem Delivery
Feb 8, 2005

Death created time to grow the things that it would kill

The Wrestling Parent - September 8th, 2011



So I finally got around to taking Owen to Kung Fu Panda 2 the other day. I was hoping we'd have a nice relaxing time, I'd just gotten off a couple week stretch on the road. But after just a few minutes of talking with him before the movie I realized something was wrong. After the movie I took him out for ice cream and asked him about it. He came out and told me he was worried about me facing Steiner on Sunday. Apparently some kids at school had been teasing him, telling him that I was a bad man and that Steiner was going to "crush me". He said he hated seeing Steiner and how he treated people. And he hated Steiner's stupid goatee (can't say I disagree with him).

The teasing had really gotten to him, I guess his schoolmates hadn't taken kindly to me trying to become the new big hero in TNA and he'd been hearing it for weeks. I told him it was gonna be OK. I told him I was going to beat Steiner on Sunday and raise the Best at Super Hossing Trophy. And he'd be there to celebrate with me. He nearly dropped his ice cream cone. He's never had a chance to see me wrestle and I figured this would be perfect. I beat Steiner and this will be a memory he will never forget. I'll always be his hero. He swelled up with confidence and pride and I could see the fear wash away. I was gonna kick Steiner's rear end and my little dude will have a ringside seat.

Jenkem Delivery
Feb 8, 2005

Death created time to grow the things that it would kill

Sorry I've been slow on getting No Surrender posted. I really need someone else to help write/book if we want to pick up the pace.

Jenkem Delivery
Feb 8, 2005

Death created time to grow the things that it would kill



quote:

"Welcome to No Surrender! We get a shot panning around the Impact Zone as fans are ready for a night of amazing action from the hottest promotion in Professional Wrestling! Ladders are scattered about the ringside area in preparation for our opening match, a four way ladder match for a shot at the Tag Team titles at Bound For Glory. Let's not waste any time! Lynyrd Skynyrd blasts through the arena as #DEMBOYS THE BRISCOES come down to the ring, waving the stars and bars and shouting vaguely offensive things at the crowd! Next, we get the British Invasion decked out in the Union Jack. Prince Puma and Hernandez come down to the ring on low rider bikes to ""Low Rider"" by War. Finally, ""Faithless"" by Injected plays and we've got Future Shock! The four teams stand in their respective corners and stare each other down as the contract for the Tag Team Title Match at Bound For Glory is lowered in a case above the ring. All four teams glance at each other, then everyone looks over to Hernandez who towers above the rest of the competitors. Hernandez looks at everyone staring at him, confused for a moment. His face turns to a look of horror as all the other competitors rush over and simultaneously hit Hernandez with superkicks! Puma watches astonished as his partner crumples into a heap before the match! The bell rings and everyone starts brawling right off the bat!

Kyle O'Reilly starts off against Magnus, hitting the big Brit with a series of leg kicks. Magnus manages to fight through the pain and blasts Kyle with a European uppercut! Kyle staggers back through the ropes and stands up on the apron Magnus charges at him going for a lariat! Kyle gets his bearings and hops up, catching Magnus' outstretched arm and putting him in a rope-assisted armbar! Magnus howls in pain as Kyle wrenches on his arm. Douglas Williams runs over to help his partner and they pull Kyle up into a vertical position. Magnus turns around, preparing to powerbomb Kyle when Prince Puma leapfrogs Williams and hits Magnus and Kyle with a flying enziguri! Both men tumble to the outside as Puma goes for a quick follow up roundhouse to Williams, who ducks it and grabs Puma in a rear waistlock and goes for a German Suplex. Puma does a full backflip in mid air and lands on his feet. Williams shows off to the crowd, proud of his still sharp ring reactions when Puma leaps onto his shoulders from behind. POISONED RANA! Williams was't sharp enough! Puma turns around to get hit with a lariat from Jay Briscoe! The larger Briscoe brother immediately hits Puma with his signature jabs and floors him with a snap suplex!

Meanwhile the rest of the combatants have moved outside the ring and brawl back and forth. Hernandez slowly slides out of the ring, regaining his composure as he sees most of the folks responsible for superkicking the poo poo out of him. He picks up a ladder and chucks it into the melee! Bodies go flying! He picks up another and another, throwing them with little regard for aim! Satisified with his work at the sight of a tangle of bodies and ladders, he slides into the ring and whacks Jay Briscoe with a shoulder block, sending him to the outside. He checks on Puma who needs a moment to clear the cobwebs before giving the thumbs up. Hernandez turns around to see everyone getting to their feet and winks at Puma, pointing a thumb into the air. Puma nods and sprints towards the ropes getting a full head of steam as Hernandez turns his back to the outside and squats down a bit. Puma hops up and stands on Hernandez's shoulders, Puma facing the opposite way from Hernandez. Hernandez turns around, so that he faces the outside and Puma has his back to the wrestlers on the outside. What the hell are they doing. Puma steadies himself and HITS A MOONSAULT OFF HERNANDEZ'S SHOULDERS TO THE OUTSIDE! HE CRASHES THROUGH MULTIPLE COMPETITORS SENDING BODIES EVERYWHERE.

Hernandez goes outside and grabs a couple ladders and slides them into the ring. He quickly sets one up and heads for the briefcase when Doug Williams climbs up behind and grabs him in a rear waistlock! Williams german suplexes Hernandez off the ladder! The big man hits the canvas hard, shaking the ring and knocking the ladder over. Williams scrambles to his feet as Magnus slides in and both set to work getting the ladder up. They have the ladder set up when Magnus gets blasted with a superkick! Williams turns around to eat a roundhouse kick! Future Shock is in the ring! They climb the ladder when the Briscoes scramble up and start brawling with them! Prince Puma runs in and pushes the ladder over, sending all four men flying! Williams pops up and grabs Puma in a rear waistlock, Magnus bounces off the ropes and hits a big boot to the face of Puma as Williams snap german suplexes the Aztec warrior! The Briscoes and Future Shock attack the British Invasion! All six men are brawling as Hernandez staggers to his feet and goes for a big double lariat! The Briscoes manage to maneuver over and hit Hernandez with a double hip toss! Hernandez gets up to one knee to eat an Axe and Smash from Kyle, then a shining wizard from Cole! Magnus picks up the big man in a bear hug and nods to Williams, who climbs to the top rope and hits a diving european uppercut! Hernandez is out cold!

The Briscoes hit quick superkicks on Future Shock! They face off with the British Invasion and start throwing bombs! Jay hits a number of brutal right hands on Williams as Mark takes down Magnus with some of his signature redneck kung fu! Jay picks up Williams in a tiger driver position, and Mark springboards off the ropes, SPIKE JAY DRILLER!! Magnus tries to get his feet but is stopped with double drop kicks! Jay quickly scrambles up the ladder as Mark stands at the base, holding a kung fu stance as he prepares to take down anyone who'd interfere! Jay Briscoe pulls down the briefcase! The Briscoes win and will get a tag team title shot at Bound For Glory!"

******************************************

Io Shirai comes down to the ring with the Hot Skyjin Wife for her title match with Mickie James. Io wears a cat-style lucha mask which she removes when she comes to the ring. Mickie comes down to the ring. We get intros and the match is under way! Io immediately goes for a roundhouse which Mickie ducks and counters with a sweep. Io gets taken down and Mickie goes for the STF but Io turns over and kicks Mickie's legs out, sending her sprawling into Io's guard. Io quickly transitions off her back into a crossface, trying to trap Mickie's arm but Mickie gets to the ropes! Io breaks the hold and both women stand up and circle each other, stalking and analyzing as they plan their next move. Mickie goes in for a collar and elbow tie up, Io reverses into a wrist lock but Mickie drops to her back and kips up, reversing into a throw, sending Io to the canvas. Mickie hits an elbow drop then a knee drop and goes for the cover: 1...2... No Io kicks out! Mickie works over Io over with a series of strikes, but Io comes in for a discus elbow and gets caught by Mickie with an arm trap neckbreaker! Mickie follows up with a lifting DDT and goes for the pin: 1...2.. Io barely gets a shoulder up! The Hot Skyjin wife screams out for io, trying to encourage her to get up and fight back.

Io manages to get up in the corner with the aid of the ropes and Mickie rushes in, going for a monkey flip! Io lands on her feet and spins around to catch Mickie with a vicious roundhouse kick! Io goes for the pin! 1...2... No, Io almost had it there! Io wastes no time in hitting Mickie with a leg kick, taking her base out from under her and following up with a kneebar! Mickie is in pain as Io wrenches hard on her leg, stretching the various ligaments and tendons in that left leg! Mickie manages to make her way to the ropes and Io breaks the hold, but barely lets Mickie stand up before hitting her with a dropkick, then a german suplex! 1...2.....Mickie barely gets a shoulder up in time! Io follows up with a standing shooting star press! 1....2...no Mickie again gets out of it! Mickie rolls to the outside to give herself a break, circling the ring and eying her opponent. Io screams at Mickie and tries to draw her back in! Mickie slides in and avoids the quick roundhouse kick from Io and hits the snapmare takeover, then sprints into the ropes and hits a low angle dropkick right to the back of Io's head! Mickie covers her....1...2....no Io kicks out! Mickie continues to work over Io with strikes and slams before Io gets the upper hand and uses a drop toe hold to put Mickie laying on the middle rope! Io sprints across the ring, bouncing off the ropes for momentum and hits a tiger feint kick! She drags Mickie towards the corner and motions for the moonsault! Io springboards to the top rope but the ref is distracted by someone, It's Sara Del Rey! Cheerleader Melissa pops up on the apron and cracks Io in the face with an elbow sending her tumbling off the ropes! Mickie manages to recover mere seconds before Io does, and sees her opponent dazed. The perfect opportunity! Mickie hits the Mick kick! Io crumples into a heap as Mickie goes for the pin: 1...2...3... Mickie James retains the TNA Knockouts Title!"


******************************************


"Brother Pope D'Angelo Dinero comes out to Team 3D's theme music, wearing a Team 3D shirt and his trademark surgical mask and sunglasses, both emblazoned with ""3D"" in rhinestones. He makes the 3D hand gesture in the ring and awaits the champion. ""OLE OLE OLE....OLE....OLE!!"" El Generico's theme blasts through the impact zone as he comes down to the ring, high fiving various fans and posing for a picture with a couple of kids. Generico gets into the ring and gets up on the turnbuckles, posing with the title before handing it over to the ref. We get in ring introductions, it's Brother Pope vs. El Generico for the TV Title. The bell rings and we're underway! Pope and Generico circle the ring, sizing each other up before Generico goes in for a wrist lock and gets caught with a quick jab by the challenger. Pope nails a few more quick jabs then follows up with a roundhouse but Generico ducks the blow and goes for the Blue Thunder Bong right away! Pope spins out of the way and goes for a straight right but Generico has it scouted and grabs the arm then hits a quick Lucha Arm Drag! Both pop up and Pope goes for another but Generico again hits the arm drag! Both pop up again and this time Pope fakes the straight right, suckering Generico in for a left handed uppercut! The Champion is staggered as Pope goes for a Codebreaker but Generico catches Pope and drops him into a sitout facebuster! The Champ goes for a quick pin attempt but Pope kicks out at 2. Generico sends Pope into the ropes and hits a quick dropkick, sending the challenger towards the corner.

Generico climbs the turnbuckles and pumps the crowd up, then hits a moonsault! Pin attempt 1.....2...No Pope kicks out! Generico throws Pope into the corner and sprints over to follow up with the Yakuza kick! Pope ducks out of the way and Generico gets his leg stuck in the top turnbuckle. Pope quickly takes advantage by hitting a rope trap neckbreaker! He goes for a quick pin on Generico: 1....2...the champ kicks out! Pope throws Generico into the ropes and hits a sitout spinebuster then quickly transitions into the scissored armbar! Generico is in serious trouble here as he gets wrenched in half by Brother Pope! Generico howls in agony as he scoots his body to the side and gets a foot on the bottom rope! Pope holds on for a good chunk of the 5 count and finally lets go. Pope picks up Generico and hits him with a quick STO then sends him into the corner. He pulls his knee pads down and points to Generico who is slumped over the turnbuckles. Pope sprints and leaps at the Generic Luchador aiming to drive his knees right into the spine with the DDE but Generico comes to and drops down, rolling out of the ring! Pope collides into the turnbuckles and tumbles out on the other side of the ringpost from the champ! Generico dives throught the first and second turnbuckles and catches Brother Pope with a tornado DDT! He quickly rolls Pope back into the ring and sends him into the corner, following up with a Yakuza Kick! Pope staggers forward into the waiting arms of Generico for a Blue Thunder bong! Generico holds him down for the pin: 1...2...3! El Generico retains the title!"


******************************************


"Team 3D comes out to their regular theme music, carrying a couple of tables. Beer money comes down with a couple of steel chairs and a big ice chest full of tasty beverages. We get in ring intros for the No Disqualification championship match and the bell rings. We are underway! Storm and Roode immediately start whipping beer cans at Team 3D! Bully Ray and Bully Devon take a few shots and let out a yell, picking up a table and using it as a shield to bullrush their opponents, knocking them down! Bully Devon grabs Storm and throws him to the outside while Bully Ray brawls with Roode. Bully Ray hits Roode with a series of right hands then a powerslam. Ray goes for a quick pin: 1...2... Roode kicks out.

Meanwhile Devon throws Storm into the barricade. Storm quickly recovers and hits Devon with a knee to the midsection. Storm goes for a pump kick but Devon catches the blow, but Storm follows up with a quick enziguri! Devon staggers and Storm follows up with a quick snap suplex on the outside! He picks up Devon and sends him crashing into the apron! Storm tries to follow up with a high knee but Devon barely evades him and follows up with a bionic elbow! Storm staggers back, giving Devon an opening to blast him with a kick of his own. Devon takes a moment to recover from the suplex then grabs Storm by the arm and tries to send him into the ringpost, but Storm reverses! Devon crashes face first into the steel post and crumples into a heap. Storm slides into the ring and clubs Bully Ray over the back, giving the assist to his Tag Team partner!

Storm helps Roode up and both men nod at each other and give a beer drinking hand gesture then proceed to hit alternating chops on Bully Ray! Ray staggers into the ropes but Beer Money isn't about to let the man from D-ville get away! Roode hits a powerslam on Bully Ray and both men hit alternating elbow drops onto Ray. Both men pick Ray up and send him into the ropes. Roode picks him up and goes for the spinning spinebuster, right into a double knee backcracker from Storm! Roode goes for the pin: 1.....2....DEVON BARELY BREAKS UP THE PIN! Bully ray slinks away towards the cooler as Devon uses the element of surprise to hit a double lariat! Ray helps himself up and runs over to start stomping on the prone Storm while Devon is in a full mount on top of Roode and pounding away on the Canadian. Ray sets up Storm and wipes his wet hands off on Storm's back, then hits him with a piledriver! Devon hits a lifting inverted DDT on Roode, then kicks him out of the ring. Ray grabs Storm's legs and spreads them, pointing at Devon then at the top rope. Devon nods and goes up, both brothers look at each other and yell ""WASSSSUPPPPP"" then Devon hits a diving headbutt into Storm's dick! (What is this, 2000? Who the hell says wasssuppp anymore?) Ray points to Devon. ""DEVON.....GET THE TABLE!!"" He shouts. It's time to take a ride to D-ville folks! Devon meticulously sets up the table as Ray picks up Storm. He sends Storm into the ropes and they hit the 3D on Storm through the table!

Devon is about to go for the pin when Roode runs in and pulls him away from his partner! Bully Ray sneaks up behind Roode and spins him around, then opens a shook up can of beer right in Roode's face! Stinging foam sprays Roode in the eyes and he screams in agony! He's blind! ""Devon, set up another loving table!"" Bully Ray screams. Devon sets up another and both men hit the 3D on a blinded Roode! Bully Ray casually saunters over to the cooler and grabs a couple of beers. Both men go for the pin on Roode and crack open a couple of cold ones! 1....2....3! TEAM 3D ARE YOUR NEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS! Team 3D takes their belts and dump the rest of their beers over the fallen former champions, then dump the rest of the ice chest over them! They leave Beer Money on ice as they head up the ramp celebrating their victory!"


******************************************


"Next is Austin Aries vs Alex Shelley. Shelley comes down to the ring and awaits the champion. Aries comes down the ramp with his trademark aviators, calling various members of the Impact Zone cucks and betas. Aries climbs into the ring, handing off his title and watching Shelley with a confident smirk. We get in ring intros for the Championship match and the bell rings! Aries starts off strong, not letting Shelley have a minute to breathe before he’s on him again. Shelley attempts a preemptive counter to The American Alpha’s moonsault, only for A-Quadruple to jump down from the rope instead. Shelley is tough, but Aries is more cunning. Shelley whips Aries into the ropes, only for Aries to kick him on the rebound. Before Shelley can even react, Aries whips him into the corner, and runs to the other corner, pauses to yell at an audience member for being a beta cuck, and then runs at Shelley for the IE--No! Shelley dodges, Aries kicks the ringpost instead!

Shelley looks down at the stunned Aries, and the momentum shifts his way! Before Aries can get his bearings, Shelley is on him, paying him back for every hit. Aries plan clearly didn’t account for getting hit in the face, and it shows. Shelley grabs Aries and hits a Sliced Bread #2 on him!

1...no! Aries kicks out. Shelley seemed to have planned for this, as he doesn’t even look at the ref, already back on Aries. The two trade fists, forearms, and elbows, each man trying to show the other who is the true Alpha male! Aries swings at Shelley, who ducks and picks him up for the WA4!! Aries tries to escape, but Shelley hits it! He doesn’t even attempt a pin, instead picking him up again for a second, but no! His grip slips! Aries lands on his feet!

Taking advantage of this momentary lapse, Aries hits a discus elbow on the shocked Shelley, knocking him to the canvas. Wasting no time, Aries goes for the False Flag! Shelley struggles, but has no choice but to tap out to the False Flag! The American Alpha is still the X-Division Champion!


******************************************

"Before Shelley even leaves the ring, Aries has a microphone in his hands. “Now EVERYONE knows that this snowflake here’s talk is just that--talk. I am the one true Alpha in this company, but I’m feeling generous because that match was easy. Any of you betas in the audience can come in here and get a free shot at me. It’s the closest any of you libtards will ever get to a true Alpha. I can take each and every one of you whiny--”
He can’t finish the sentence, before an audience member in a Sting mask slides into the ring. Aries turns around and gets chopped in the chest! Aries stumbles back as the masked figure hits him with another brutal chop! Aries is knocked him out of the ring, tumbling to the floor. He looks up shock, as the figure stares down on him, and takes off the mask to reveal...... EDDIE EDWARDS! Edwards stares down at Aries, pointing at the title, and his theme plays as Aries scrambles back up the ramp, fear in his eyes."


******************************************

Hogan, Abyss, Jarrett, and Gunner come out to Immortal's theme music and get in the ring. Hogan grabs a microphone, smirking as he is surrounded by his boys. "So I guess Bischoffo was too much of a loving coward to show up and face us after his bullshit this past week. He didn't even show up to the arena tonight! He and the Hardys ran down to Mexico with their tails between their legs like the little bitches they are." The rest of the gang laugh and share various profanities which are picked up by the mic. "So I'm running the loving show tonight! And that means we're going to call out some unlucky saps to get their asses kicked by Double J and Abyss! They haven't had a match in a couple weeks and they need to stay fresh so that IF, and that's a big IF Bitchoffo and his Hard on Boys come back they'll be sharp and ready to kick their asses. Eric Young, Crimson! GET YOUR WORTHLESS GINGER ASSES DOWN HERE TO GET A loving BEATDOWN BROTHER!"


******************************************


Eric Young and Crimson come down to face Abyss and Jarrett. The match is really more of a handicap match as Gunner periodically interferes, and Hogan orders the Ref not to issue the disqualification. Abyss, Jarrett, and Gunner work over both Young and Crimson for a bit. The Ginger Boys eventually get some momentum back and manage to send Gunner out of the ring before turning their attention to the actual match participants. Crimson hits an exploder on Jarrett as Young hits Abyss with a piledriver. Young goes to the top rope for a Moonsault on Jarrett as Crimson pounds on Abyss. Gunner recovers and pushes Young off the top rope, sending him sprawling him to the outside! Hogan slides a guitar into the ring and Jarrett hits the kabong on Crimson! Abyss follows up with a Black Hole Slam and both stand over the fallen Crimson for a pin: 1...2....3! Immortal win! Hogan celebrates by taunting the crowd and taunting the Ginger Boys for not having souls.


******************************************

"Mr. Anderson comes down the ring ready for his match against Joe. His signature lead pipe is noticeably absent as he waits his opponent. Samoa Joe comes out with Okato and both men pose at the top of the ramp for a quick pop then Joe sprints down to the ring! He slides in and goes after Anderson, who quickly escapes to the outside! Anderson yells at Joe to get the gently caress back so he can get in! The two trade insults and profanities before the ref managers to get Joe back to his corner while Okato and Anderson trade some profanities. Anderson finally gets into the ring and the ref motions for the bell! He barely has time to turn his head away from the timekeeper's area as Joe sprints and hits a flying enziguri on Anderson! Anderson stumbles back to the corner and eats a number of precision strikes in quick succession. Joe is loving furious! Anderson manages to sneak a knee in to Joe's gut and get some breathing room. He feints the roundhouse kick, causing Joe to go for the block then hits him with a straight left followed by an enziguri! Anderson seems to have upped his striking game in preparation for this match! He goes for a quick pin: 1...no Joe kicks out! As both fights get to their feet Anderson goes for a kick to the inside of Joe's left thigh, sending a loud smack of shin on flesh throughout the arena! Joe winces and steps back, giving Anderson just enough room to hit a quick dropkick to the same leg! Joe hits the mat and Anderson goes for a knee drop but Joe rolls out of the way on pure instinct. Anderson hits the mat hard and Joe follows up with a quick elbow strike from the kneeling position.

Anderson goes down and Joe goes for the Coquina Clutch but Anderson is too close to the ropes and manages to get a foot on them to break the hold. Both men are stood up by the referee and go back at it! Anderson fakes a leg kick and goes for a lariat but Joe ducks and spins behind Anderon and grabs him for the head and arm suplex! Joe goes for the pin: 1...2.. Kick out! Anderson staggers back as Joe swarms him with more strikes. Anderson ties up with Joe and hits him with a couple of quick knees in the clinch then follows up with a powerslam! Anderson takes advantage and immediately picks up Joe and goes for the buckle bomb! The big man shakes the ring with the impact then stumbles forward right in front of the turnbuckle! Anderson goes to the top rope and motions for the Kenton bomb! He dives off the top turnbuckle but Joe rolls out of the way! Anderson hits the canvas hard as there's no water in the pool. Joe hits a big boy senton on Anderson then picks him up and puts him on the top turnbuckle! He's going for the muscle buster! Anderson has just enough awareness to rake Joe's eyes! Joe staggers back and Anderson high tails it out of there! Okato checks on Joe as Anderson sprints up the ramp and heads backstage! The ref counts Anderson out and awards Joe the victory, but Joe doesn't seem terribly happy as him arm is raised. Joe is the winner!"


******************************************

"Kazarian and Daniels come out, getting in the ring and shouting at the entranceway, taunting Sting and Styles. Both come out at the same time, fist bump at the top of the ramp then come down to the ring. Both men get in and Kaz and Daniels immediately begin attacking them! The bell rings and the match begins. Kaz and Daniels toss Sting out of the ring, then throw Styles into the ropes. Kaz his him with the lariat and Daniels goes low for the chop block! BAD ELIMINATION! Kaz goes for the pin while Daniels goes to the ropes to keep Sting from running in. 1...2...Styles kicks out! Kaz is shocked! Daniels is distracted as he turns, expectin the bell and Sting pulls him to the outside then sends does a huge Irish Whip, sending Daniels into the barricade! I guess Styles and Kaz are legal.

Styles gets up and hits a quick forearm to Kaz, them sends him into the corner and follows up with a leaping elbow strike! Kaz staggers out and AJ hits him with the dropkick! AJ goes for a quick pin: 1.....2... no Kazarian kicks out. AJ gets up and hits Kaz with a savate then enziguri kick! He pulls Kaz up and blasts him with a chop, and gets a forearm in return! Both men trade forearms in a show of fighting spirit! Styles finally hits a forearm, then a back elbow, then a pele kick! Phenomenal combo! Kazarian is down! Styles goes to the apron and looks to the crowd, they're ready! SPRINGBOARD 450 SPLASH! 1....2...Daniels breaks up the pin! Sting comes in to fight off Daniels as all four men brawl in the ring! Kazarian and Daniels manage to get the upper hand and knock Sting to the outside. Daniels gets outside for a quick tag from Kazaran and immediate hits a shotgun dropkick on Styles!

Daniels follows up with a series of quick elbow drops and continues to work Styles over. Daniels manages to dominate Styles until he gets hit with a surprise enziguri! Styles tags in Sting! Sting hits Daniels with a knee, then sends him into the corner for a Stinger splash! Sting goes for the pin: 1...2...No! Sting works over Daniels for a bit and gets him in a sleeper, but Daniels reverses it into a Koji Clutch! Sting manages to make it to the ropes, breaking the hold. Daniels tags in Kazarian who hits Sting with a jumping high kick then follows up with a series of leg drops and goes for the pin: 1.....2...no Sting kicks out! Sting manages to counter a spring board back elbow with a drop kick! Both men struggle to their corners and tag in their respective partners. Styles hits a flying dropkick on Daniels, then a rope assisted enziguri on Kazarian! Styles hops through the ropes and waits for Daniels to get to his feet....SPRINGBOARD ELBOW STRIKE! HE CALLS THAT THE EXCEPTIONAL ELBOW! Styles goes for the pin 1....2....3..Sting and Styles are your winners!"


******************************************


"And now for our main event, Finals of The Best at Super Hossing Tournament (presented by Hoss' Loaded Burgers. It aint a burger, unless it's a HOSS LOADED BURGER). Steen comes out first, stopping at ringside to give his son Owen a hug and gets in the ring. Steiner comes down and yells at Owen, then gets into the ring. Both men take cursory glances at the trophy, then stare each other down. It seems like a little more personal than your average tournament match between two men who have never wrestled before. Steiner laughs at Steen, pointing to his midsection ""You think your fat rear end stands a chance against me? You've never faced a real man like me before!"" The bell rings and Steen circles him, Steiner comes in for a quick lariat but Steen sidesteps him and hits the superkick! Steen gets in some offense, hitting Steiner with a series of suplexes before putting him in a headlock and taunting Steiner ""You can't do poo poo, old man! I'm going to beat your rear end in front of all these people!""

Steiner groans and fights his way out of the headlock, using a half nelson transition to get a headlock of his own. Steen gets to the rope to break the hold but as soon as they stand up Steiner hits a belly to belly suplex. Steen quickly gets up and counters with an exploder suplex of his own! Steiner hits a german suplex on Steen, who gets right back up and hits a half and half suplex on Steiner! Steiner immediately gets up and hits Steen with a dragon suplex, who gets right up and hits Steiner with the Steen breaker! Steiner gets up and smiles at Steen ""Is that all you've got? I'm going to make you bleed in front of your kid and all these white trash and rednecks!"" Steen goes for a superkick but Steiner ducks and levels Steen with a Steiner line! Steiner sends Steen into the ropes and goes for the shoulder block but Steen stands firm! ""Looks like my fat rear end is too big for you take down old man!"" He doesn't even give Steiner a chance to reply and blasts him with a right hand! Steiner staggers back and Steen sends him into the ropes then hits a high back body drop! Steen goes for the pin: 1...2... no Steiner kicks out! Steiner slides out of the ring to recover but Steen follows quickly behind. Steen sprints on the apron and hits Steiner with a soccer kick, then comes back and follows up with a senton off the ring apron! Steiner goes down and Steen pops up, pointing to the apron! He's going for the Papa Powerbomb on the apron! Steen puts Steiner's head between his legs, but Big Poppa Pump reverses it into a back body drop, sending Steen spine first onto the apron! Steiner picks Steen up and rolls him into the ring and goes for the pin: 1....2...No Steen gets a shoulder up!

Steiner works steen over with a series of stomps and goes for the Steiner recliner but Steen manages to get to the rope! The ref breaks the two fighters up and Steen bullrushes Steiner with a dropkick followed up by a big boy senton! Steen goes for the cover: 1...2....Steiner kicks out! Fatigue is beginning to set in for both men as they struggle to their feet. They trade a series of hard rights back and forth, sweat and spit flying across the ring as the men exchange blows! Steen ducks a Steiner right and catches Big Poppa Pump in a fireman's carry. DEEP SEA DIVERTICULITIS!!! Steen stumbles to the ropes and points at Owen, sweat pouring down his face as he calls out to his son. ""THIS IS FOR YOU BUDDY! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!"" he shouts, as his son yells something back the microphones don't quite pick up. Steen turns around and STEINER SURPRISES STEEN WITH A BOOT TO THE GUT! Steen doubles over in pain as Steiner hooks both arms, BUTTERFLY FLOAT OVER SUPLEX! Steiner quickly takes Steen's back and spreads Kevin's arms over his legs, HE'S GOT HIM IN THE STEINER RECLINER!! Steen reaches towards the ropes and his son, his face turning a dark shade of crimson as Steiner wrenches back on his neck. The ref is right there, checking on Steen to see if he submits. Steen gurgles, spit bubbling on his lips as he fights towards the ropes but Steiner uses his strength and weight to pull back and stop Kevin's momentum. Steen's eyes are watering as his arm starts to go limp. ""Oweennnnnn......"" he gasps. The ref shakes Steen's arm and yells at Kevin and gets no response. STEEN IS OUT! THE REFEREE CALLS FOR THE BELL! BIG POPPA PUMP WINS THE BEST AT SUPER HOSSING TOURNAMENT AND A TITLE SHOT AGAINST STING AT BOUND FOR GLORY!!!

Steiner flexes and poses over Steen as he slowly regains consciousness with the referee and ringside doctor checking on him. Big Poppa Pump grabs the BASH trophy and hoists it with one arm, flexing with the other. The camera cuts to Owen Steen, his face buried in his hand as he sobs. Steen finally regains his senses and rolls out of the ring, going to comfort his son as he looks up and glares daggers at Steiner as Big Poppa Pump hurls a few insults at Steen, then goes back to posing as we cut away from the Impact Zone...."


*****************************

"The screen cuts to blackness. Off in the distance....a faint light slowly approaches the camera. As the light grows we see a few shapes illuminated in flickering torchlight. As they approach we can make them out, it's Enrico Bischoffo flanked by the Hardys! Mattanza and Jeff each hold a torch as the trio makes their way through a maze of twisting stone corridors. ""Will it work? We've come all this way and left the Impact Zone in Hogan's control. We're taking a huge risk just being here."" Jeff asks. Bischoffo smiles ""The priests assured me, it will work. Did you think I'd come here just on a whim?"" Jeff nods ""Have faith, brother. The Aztec gods will be appeased, and will reward us"" Mattanza responds , his voice growly and muffled by the heavy mask. They finally reach a huge circular chamber lit by a ring of torches. A number of men in Aztec clothing surround a giant stone pit. ""Listo?"" Bischoffo asks. One of the men nods and motions to the others. They begin chanting in unison, surrounding the giant pit and gesturing.

Bischoffo nods to the Hardys who go stand against a wall, each one holding a hand over a button. The priests continue to chant, their voices rising in a crescendo of ancient Nahuatl. Bischoffo points to Mattanza, who presses a button. Suddenly a stream of something begins to drip from the ceiling. After a few seconds the drops become a trickle, then a stream, then a torrent! As the liquid rushes down we get a close up..is that....blood? The voices rise to shouts, the priests begin dancing around the pit, shouting to the heavens. Bischoffo's face contorts to a look of unbridled glee. He points to Jeff. ""AHORA!!"" he shouts. Jeff presses the button and suddenly a stream of sunlight pours in through the roof! The chants rise to a deafening roar. Bischoffo is now screaming along with them raising his arms as the pit of blood begins to bubble. Suddenly, a hand shoots out of the pool and grabs the side, then another. A figure pulls itself out of the pit, illuminated by the sunlight and covered head to toe in blood. We are unable to make out the exact features but we can tell it is a very wide, muscular man. He opens his eyes, blinking a couple times and scanning the chamber. Bischoffo cackles, his face a mask of unhinged, unadulterated glee as he takes in his new weapon of violence. "I'll be a son of a bitch....."

A B- show!

Jenkem Delivery fucked around with this message at Apr 29, 2017 around 18:53

Jenkem Delivery
Feb 8, 2005

Death created time to grow the things that it would kill



quote:

Impact opens with a No Surrender recap video

****************************

Sara Del Rey versus Misaki Ohata. Ohata gets the upper hand quickly with strikes and a german suplex. The two trade suplexes back and forth and as Ohata goes for the stretch muffler, Del Rey picks the leg and rolls her into the omoplata crossface. Ohata taps out, Del Rey is the victor.


****************************

Immortal come down the ramp, pacing the ring like a pack of hungry wolves. Hogan grabs the microphone "So as you know; last night, Bischoffo didn't even show up to No Surrender. He was down in Mexico hiding from immortal with his tail between his legs LIKE THE LITTLE BITCH HE IS BROTHER!!" Hogan points towards the entranceway "I bet he's too afraid to even show his face right now because he knows the beating he and his Hardy Boys are gonna get from us!" Bischoffo's music hits and he comes out at the top of the ramp, flanked by the Hardys. "Oh Hogan, you fool." Bischoffo chastises his former associate. "You thought I was running? I wasn't running. I had a mission! I was searching for something!" The camera zooms in on Bischoffo, his eyes wild with glee, his face contorting into a look of sick excitement. "And I completed my mission, I found what I was looking for. I found a vessel of violence to join me in cementing my rule over the impact zone, and I will unleash him....TONIGHT." Hogan steps back and looks quizzically at the other members of Immortal. "Oh yeah? You're going to show off your shiny new toy, brother? Well I am going to have Gunner here BREAK HIM IN HALF!" Gunner smiles and cracks his knuckles, pointing and yelling at Bischoffo. Bischoffo smiles "Perfect. It will be an amazing opportunity to raise the level of violence around here. I hope you're ready, Gunner." Bischoffo drops the microphone and heads backstage with the Hardys.


****************************


Eddie Edwards versus Mark Haskins. Edwards controls the match quickly with chops and suplexes. Haskins gets a narrow window of opportunity and tries to take Edwards' back for the sleeper but Edwards picks him up and hits the backpack stunner. Edwards then hits the Boston Knee Party and gets the pin for the win


****************************


Hernandez and Puma versus The Big Boy Michael Elgin and Eric Young. Elgin uses his power to quickly get control over Hernandez, surprising the big man with his freakish strength. Hernandez tags in Puma who uses his speed and agility to outmaneuver Elgin and gain the upper hand. Elgin tags in Young who takes down Puma but eventually winds up getting Gorilla Pressed by Hernandez into a Puma Driller by Puma. Puma hits young with a 630 Senton to get the pin


****************************


Cheerleader Melissa versus Io Shirai in a revenge match after Melissa cost Io the title at No Surrender. In a back and forth match Io eventually gains the upper hand and is about to hit a moonsault from the turnbuckle when Mickie James runs down and hits her with a flying Mick Kick from the apron! Io spills down into the ring, giving Melissa the opportunity to grab Io and hit her with the devastating Butterfly Kisses (Cop Killer). Melissa gets the pinfall for the victory


****************************


"We go to Enrico Bischoffo's office, the camera showing the back of someone sitting at his desk as he finishes giving instructions. ""Just focus on destroying him. We will make sure the rest of Immortal don't pull any of their usual poo poo."" He says with a grin. The figure nods and gets up, facing away as the camera pans towards Bischoffo. He starts writing something when Austin Aries bursts into his office, carrying an easel and document tubes. ""Are you planning on doing a portrait of me?"" Bischoffo asks jokingly. ""Make sure you get my good side"" he says, turning and making a serious face. Aries finishes setting up the easel and fumes at being insulted, his face turning a bright shade of crimson. ""Cut the poo poo, Bischoffo. I know what you were trying to do to me last night. I'm not an idiot."" Bischoffo settles back into his chair. ""Oh, this is going to be good."" he chuckles, steepling his fingers on his chest. ""And what do you think I was trying to do?""



Aries smiles, popping open a document tube and unrolling a poster sized piece of paper. ""You brought Eddie Edwards in here to get the title off of me! You sent your little attack dog to take me out and get the title off me and silence me! I know, what you're up to, I know your whole plan Bischoffo."" Bischoffo and the Hardys all let out a hearty laugh, even Mattanza. ""Oh.....oh....ok..."" He says, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye. ""Please....please tell me what my plan is!"" Aries smiles, putting the paper on the easel. It contains an unintelligible diagram of names, connected by various lines with notes/rantings written in odd spaces all over. Some of the writings are visible ""STEINER = LIZARD MAN?"", ""AZTEC PYRAMIDS ON THE DOLLAR"", ""CHEMTRAILS MADE MATTANZA"". Aries continues pressing his point ""I've spend months making this diagram. I know that you never went to Mexico, Eddie Edwards was your secret weapon all along! You're trying to use him to get the title off me because you're afraid I'll go to Hogan with all the dirt I discovered!"" Bischoffo shakes his head ""Jesus man, you ever consider medication? I'm not after your X Division title. Eddie Edwards signed because he wanted a chance to make a name for himself. You called out everyone in the building to come after your title. It presented the perfect opportunity for him to prove he can cut it here in the Impact Zone. It doesn't a genius to figure that out. So it's you and Eddie Edwards at Bound For Glory for the X Division Championship!""

Aries shouts ""NO! NO! YOU CAN'T DO THIS! YOU'RE TRYING TO TRICK ME! I KNOW STEINER DIED IN PUERTO RICO AND THIS ISN'T THE REAL BIG POPPA PUMP! I KNOW ALL YOUR SECRETS YOU SONOFABITCH!"" Enrico looks to the Hardys ""I'm through with this bullshit, get him out of here. And get wellness on the line, he's got to be on something."" The Hardys drag Aries out as he continues screaming ""WHERE'S DIXIE?! I KNOW YOU HAVE HER! WHERE ARE YOU KEEPING HER?!!"" The Hardys drag him and toss him out of the office, slamming the door in his face ""I want my diagrams back!"" He shouts as the closed door, then turns around to face...EDDIE EDWARDS! Eddie unleashes a brutal series of chops on Aries and he yelps in pain, slumping against the wall. ""I'm coming for that title, Aries. And I'm going to show you who the true Alpha is."" Eddie leaves Aries crumpled in a heap, clutching the X Division title."


****************************


Doug Williams comes down to the ring waving the Union Jack. Suddenly, "One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer" starts blaring throughout the Impact Zone. What the hell? Who is this walking out onto the ramp? IT'S SEX FERGUSON. SEX FERGUSON IS IN THE IMPACT ZONE! He points at Williams as he comes down the ramp, showing off his crocodile skin boots and blue tights. He hits the ring and we're underway! Sex avoids Williams signature suplexes and judo throws, hitting him with the choke bomb! Sex Ferguson pins Douglas Williams in his debut!


Doug Williams stays in the ring as Ferguson leaves, and Magnus and Desmond Wolfe come down to join him. Williams says goodbye to the Impact Zone and thanks the fans. They don't really care.

****************************

Ric Flair is in the ring for an interview with Big Poppa Pump. Steiner comes down to the ring with the BASH Trophy, having draped a chainmail hood over the top of it. Steiner poses and flexes for a bit before standing next to Flair. "Scott, you won the Best at Super Hossing Tournament (presented by Hoss' Loaded Burgers, they're loaded with goodness) with a close victory over Kevin Steen." Big Poppa Pump shakes his head "Close? You thought that was close? I put that fat bastard to sleep in front of his crying rear end little kid! I said I was gonna win the tournament, I said I was gonna beat that fatass, and I did! All you little pencil necked losers on the internet thought Big Poppa Pump was washed up, but you're wrong!" Ric starts getting hyped up "You're right, you were the long odds to win the tournament. What about now, what's going through your mind as you prepare for Sting at Bound For Glory?" Steiner smiles "I'm just lifting weights and eating steaks. Sting has no chance against me! I'm the genetic freak, I'm not normal! No man can defeat me!" Steiner grabs the trophy and heads to the back.

****************************

Beer Money versus the Briscoes in a battle of top contenders for the Tag titles! Both teams show off their fluid tag team moves and excellent partner chemistry, hitting a series of power moves, super kicks, and double team moves. The Briscoes are about to hit the Doomsday Device when Team 3D runs in and attacks everyone with chairs! The referee throws out the match as a no contest.

Enrico Bischoffo comes out, visibly pissed off. "Team 3D, while I appreciate your show of violence I HATE NO CONTESTS. So, you will face both Beer Money and the Briscoes at Bound For Glory in a TRIPLE THREAT TAG TEAM MATCH FOR THE TITLES!" Bully Ray and Bully Devon about poo poo themselves.

****************************

"Kevin Steen comes out, looking quite morose after his defeat at the hands of Big Poppa Pump at No Surrender. Meanwhile, AJ Styles seems to be on Cloud Nine after his win over Kaz and Daniels. AJ and Steen get into it quickly as the bell rings. Steen comes charging out of his corner like a man possessed only to get the bullfighter treatment from AJ and hitting the turnbuckles. AJ hits a quick enziguri on the back of Steen's head then an inverted DDT. Styles goes for the quick pin: 1...2...Kick out! Steen gets up and catches AJ with a quick powerslam, then a big boy senton! He sends AJ into the corner and follows up with a bull rush, knocking AJ down to the bottom turnbuckle setting him up in perfect position for a cannonball senton!

Steen rips AJ out of the corner and hits an exploder into the turnbuckles, then picks him up and hits a Steenalyzer into the turnbuckles! Steen is brutalizing the Tango Turkey! He looks like a man possessed as he takes out his frustration and rage. Steen sends Styles into the ropes in preparation for the Papa Powerbomb, but Styles is stopped as he gets hit with a baseball bat from behind! He falls forward, screaming in pain revealing Christopher Daniels behind him, holding a bat! Steen starts shouting at him as Kazarian appears and begins beating on the Boys! Steen is pissed that his beatdown on Styles was interrupted! He gets in Daniels' face shouting at him, his face contorting into a look of rage. Daniels begins to turn around then whips back and cracks Steen in the face with the end of the bat! He starts walloping Steen from the apron, hopping down once he's satisfied. He and Kazarian drag the Boys off with the bats across their throats, shouting insults at AJ. AJ slowly comes to only to see his Boys disappear behind the curtain being dragged off by his former Fortune brethren! Styles makes chase and Steen gets up, scowling at the entire scene."

****************************

Hogan comes down to the ring with Gunner, then Enrico Bischoffo comes down to the ring with his new warrior covered in a full length robe his face concealed. Bischoffo gets in the ring with his new weapon of violence, who pulls back the hood to reveal his identity.....IT'S BOBBY LASHLEY! He immediately sprints over and hits a superman punch on Gunner! The bell rings and we are underway! Lashley maintains control of the match using strikes and suplexes then hits a spear on Gunner! Lashey gets the pin over Gunner

The Hardys sprint down, followed by Abyss and Jarrett. We get a stare off. Bischoffo grabs the mic and proposes a match, the Hardys and Lashley vs. Abyss Jarrett and gunner at BFG for control of TNA!! Hogan agrees!


****************************

Steiner and Sting come down for their contract signing. Both men put pen to paper and immediately start brawling! Bischoffo cackles with glee at the violent spectacle. That's it for Impact, folks!

Impact was a B- show



quote:

Mauro on Play by Play, Desmond Wolfe on Color, Excalibur as the third man

Sara Del Rey defeats Brooke

Briscoes defeat the Boys

Desmond Wolfe Interviews Future Shock

Generico defeats Crimson to defend the TV title

Sanguinia
Jan 1, 2012

#RXT REVOLUTION~!
2000



future scoopin'...


I had a small delay on finishing Raw tonight due to travel, but its two non-match segments away from being finished so it will go up tomorrow right after I get off work. Sorry!

ChrisBTY
Mar 29, 2012


Which one is Sex Ferguson, Anderson or Gallows?

Jenkem Delivery
Feb 8, 2005

Death created time to grow the things that it would kill

You don't know who the gently caress Sex Ferguson is?! Sex Ferguson has worked on every loving continent there is!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V4PZ8Vy4tGs

Jenkem Delivery
Feb 8, 2005

Death created time to grow the things that it would kill

Ryan finishes watching "Scott Steiner versus the English Language", chuckling softly to himself. "Up Next: STEINERIZER!" Flashes across the screen. He goes for the pause button but the video starts just before he can click. "poo poo." he mutters.

quote:





"What? It's on?" poo poo!" Steiner stands up and points at the camera "Are you wondering why you feel so tired all the time? Why you can't get it up anymore? Why you look like this?"





"I got some news for you, YOU'RE A FAT PIECE OF TRASH! But there's hope, even for the worst of you fat slobs...well maybe not the worst of you like that sack of poo poo I just beat: Kevin Steen! You just need to get some of my STEINERIZER! It's got a blend of 37 pro...propapatary ingredients! Just two scoops of Steinerizer with water and you're ready to get some massive peaks and stay up all night with the freaks!"


"What the gently caress?" Ryan mutters, clicking the mouse. "Why isn't it closing?"

quote:

"You don't want to live your life as a miserable piece of poo poo, do you? Get my Steinerizer with its 52 ingredients and you can be like the Big Bad Booty Daddy!"

Steiner flexes and some women come over and surround Big Poppa Pump. "Well, not even Steinerizer with its blend of 89 ingredients make up for not having the chromosomes of the Genetic Freak but it can come close."

Ryan is furiously clicking all over the screen. He tries pressing the power button on his laptop but it doesn't seem to work....

quote:

Steiner points at the screen "So get some you fat piece of trash, Ryan! Yeah, Ryan Trebleman at 845 Poppyflower Way, Stockton, California. I know where you live, bitch!"

Ryan starts breathing heavily....his eyes wide with fear...."What....what do you want with me?"

quote:

Steiner smiles wrapping his arms around two ladies "I want you to order some! Call 1-877-Steiner and if you do it in the next five minutes you'll get a free chainmail hood! Yeah, that's it you little bitch call! Yeah order a case! No.....three cases! Yeah yeah order it...yeah hurry it the gently caress up! WHAT THE HELL HOW CAN IT TAKE YOU THIS LONG! Ok, good it's done!"

Steiner smiles and picks up massive containers of Steinerizer "Get Steinerizer, for when you want to live life like a freakzilla!"

These statements have not been proven and this supplement is not approved by the Food and Drug Administration.

Sanguinia
Jan 1, 2012

#RXT REVOLUTION~!
2000



future scoopin'...




Raw for September Week 3 posted:


*MYSTERIOUS STATIC HISS*...WE'LL GO UNTIL THE WORLD STOPS TURNIN' AND WE BURN IT TO THE GROUND TONIGHT!

***

Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler welcome us to Ottawa's Scotiabank Place, and then take us strait to the action!

Its Zack Ryder vs Tyler Reks! However, the match hasn't officially started yet when Vince McMahon steps onto the stage! He storms down to the ring, steps right past the two superstars and demands a microphone. "WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?! Who back there is responsible for putting THAT MAN'S FACE ON MY SHOW!? I know you all saw it! I know one of you is working for him! Who is it? I swear I'm going to fire every last one of you! Everyone in the trucks, everyone behind that curtain, every drat person in the locker room if that's what it takes! I won't have this insubordination! I won't be undermined! This is my show, damnit! ITS MINE! MIIIIINE!"

"Are you serious, bro?" The crowd pop's big as Zack interrupts The Boss! Vince seems to be borderline in shock, like he'd barely even noticed anyone else was in the ring. "In case you haven't noticed Vince, I've got a match here. Why don't you go have your mental breakdown somewhere else?"" Vince's face goes from red to purple in record time, and he demands to know who the hell Ryder thinks he is! "Who am I? I'm the Long Island Iced Z, Zack Ryder. And as usual, you're between me and what I want! Well I'm tired of being afraid of your temper tantrum's Vince, and I'm not the only one! So on behalf of the entire Locker Room, allow me to the be first to tell you to your face what everyone, especially that guy from Chicago, has been thinking for a decade: Get out of our way, or get run over! Ref, RING THE BELL, BRO!"

***

The ref paused for a moment, looking for approval, but Vince seemed almost dumbstruck. Eventually, the official just shrugged and rang the bell! Vince made his way out with almost lurching steps, and joined the commentary team. He more or less ignored all attempts at questioning by Cole and Lawler, and instead focused on angry mutterings on a variety of topics, from Rey Mysterio to Triple H to unruly technicians. In the ring, Ryder was on Reks hard out of the blocks and showed off all his signature spots. Tyler got in a few minutes of offense, but Zack turned the tide with a savage DDT allowing him to hit a HUGE Rough Ryder! 1, 2, 3, Zack picks up the win as Vince simply stares into space.

***

Santino Marella is still searching for the mysterious Tag Wrestling Master in England, one of wrestling's most historic heartlands! He visits the great schools of Catch-As-Catch-Can wrestling, legendary arenas where World of Sports captured the imaginations of the generation, and of course, Wembly Stadium, where Summerslam '92 was held. He even visit's William Regal's home city of Blackpool, where he questions local trainees about his quarry... but it seems to be a dead end! Nobody has seen the Tag Expert, as he left Europe for Parts Unknown years prior. Santino's efforts may be all for naught!

***

Derrick Bateman w/ The Bella Twins v CJ Parker! Parker was already in the ring when we came back from commercial, and once the bell rand didn't fare much better than last week. Bateman was characteristically arrogant as he out-wrestled CJ, but one taunt too many gave Parker the opening he needed to toss Bateman into the corner and deliver a nasty looking palm strike to the face for a nearfall! Bateman went into a rage off this mussing of his face, and savagely beat Parker into submission before delivering the Man-Tastic for the 3-count.

***

The Bellas immediately came in to tend to Bateman after the fall, making sure his face was ok. After a bit of encouragement from them, Bateman started laying into Parker again. He signaled for a second Man-tastic, hoisted Parker into position and...

STAND BACK! THERE'S A HURRICANE COMING THROUGH!

A swell of heroic music signaled the return of WWE's greatest Superhero, The Hurricane! He charged down the ramp as a full sprint, his cape billowing behind him as he slid into the ring and put fists to Bateman's face! Bateman threw a few punches in return, but they were easily avoided with a little Hurri-speed, and soon he found himself in the grip of the CHOKE-SLAM! Hurrican signaled for the Shining Wizard to finish his dastardly foe, but Bateman simply rolled out of the ring, where The Bellas quickly aided his retreat. Hurricane offered a helping hand to Citizen Parker and then posed for the crowd! Justice stands tall in Ottowa!

***

Backstage, Triple H finds the Tag Team Champions Otunga and Axel gathered around a coffee machine. Otunga sips his beverage after offering a sarcastic greeting to his 'boss.' "Enjoying your coffee Otunga? I mean, I know what a serious and dedicated competitor you are, so I guess a good cup of coffee is about the only thing that could console you after finding out you wouldn't be allowed to defend your Championship at Hell In The Cell. But here's the thing: because I KNOW how much you two boys really want to compete, I had the Board review your contract. You were absolutely right that whoever was written in that 'Challenger' space was your contender, and the 'No Contest' in that space meant you didn't have one. But it turns out, all we had to do was add more spaces." Triple H reveals a novelty contract nearly identical to the one Otunga showed last week, complete with No Contest in the Contender's slot... but an additional half dozen blank lines underneath it. "I already told the guys in the back that anyone who wants to can sign this one, and man did we get a lot of volunteers. So congratulations, you've gone from having no contender... to a Tag Team Turmoil match."

Otunga looks ill and his mug of coffee trembles in his hand as Hunter wanders off-screen... but then pokes his head back and says "Oh, by the way? You're fighting Air Boom again. Tonight. Next." Otunga drops his coffee and his mug shatters. He clearly didn't like what TRI said.

***

Air Boom vs Otunga and Axel! The Tag Champs are clearly not happy about this match, and take every shortcut in the book to try and get an early victory, going for early eye rakes and questionable double-team tactics on Kofi. Otunga gets right in the ref's face for some physical AND legal intimidation when he threatens them with disqualification. Kofi shows his iron-man side, enduring the onslaught for nearly half the match's length and occasionally firing back with a stray kick, forearm or suplex. However, every time he creates separation and tries to tag in Evan, he gets pulled back from the tag.

Desperation sets in when McG sets up for a McGillicuter, and Kofi manages to avoid the move and hit Trouble In Paradise, putting both men on the mat! The ref starts the ten-count, but both start crawling for their corners, Otunga and Bourne both stretching for all they're worth... and its a double tag! Evan uses every bit of his agility to avoid a flurry of strikes from Otunga and delivers a Halo DDT right into a kipup and Standing Moonsault! The spectacular combination pops the crowd and leaves Otunga helpless! Bourne scales the turnbuckle... and delivers the Shoot Star Press! 1! 2! 3! Air Boom has pinned the Tag Champs!

***

In the back, Scott Stanford asks Zack Ryder what the heck he's doing by so blatantly antagonizing the Chairman of the Board? "Where did playing nice ever get me? Ever since WWE took over the industry in 2001, everyone's believed that kissing The Boss's rear end is the only way to get ahead. But here's what Vince has been trying to make everyone forget for a decade: WWE doesn't make Champions, Champions make WWE! The Man In Chicago didn't get the gold by kissing rear end, he got it by being the best! And Stanford? That's exactly what I'm going to do. I'm going to fight everybody, and I'm going to win! And if Vince doesn't like that, he can tell me to hit the bricks, and I'll follow that road all the way to Tokyo, or the Hammerstein Ballroom, or maybe even Orlando. Vince will never let that happen, because he KNOWS that I'm the future of this business! So Mr. McMahon, if you've got a problem with Zack Ryder... then COME AT ME, BRO!"

***

Rene Dupree v Richie Steamboat (w/ Ricky). Another great back-and-forth between these two, their chemistry shining as they countered each other even more effectively and showed a few new moves to try and earn an edge. However, just when it was looking like Richie was going to pull a victory out, he made a critical error, allowing a springboard armdrag to be countered straight into Dupree's Cobra Clutch Slam, the Bonne Nuit! Dupree scores a clean pinfall over the Young Dragon. Richie looked decidedly disheartened, as he'd lost the previous bouts dirty but this time got strait up beat, and he stares into space with a blank expression despite his father's attempts to console him. Dupree simply crows and taunts the crowd as he goes up 3-1, meaning next week's contest could be the end of this Best of Seven Series.

***

In the Locker Room, Goldust is trying to psyche Rey Mysterio up for The Main Event, where he'll tag with John Morrison vs Ziggler and Del Rio. His method of psyching up seems to be interpretive dance. Rey watches, somewhat bewildered. "Rey, do you feel the fire within you sparking? Do you feel the embers *inhale* kindling?" Rey says he feels a little naseous. "Good! That's the first step. I'm telling you Rey, the bright lights of the arena are going to shine on you tonight! You're going to feel the FIRE again! And I'll be right there, by your side, to make sure it burns Hooooooooot." He makes that weird growling noise and bites the air, which prompts Rey to slowly sneak out a nearby door. "Yes Rey, this will truly be A Night To Remember!"

***

R-Truth v Mason Ryan. Truth looks surprisingly good against Ryan given his recent string of defeats. He seemed to take his recent record to heart and used this bout to put his back on strait... or as strait as Truth can make it when he's constantly consulting Little Jimmy for fight advice. Truth puts on a clinic, and the Colossus of Cardiff had trouble even laying hands on the agile veteran. It wasn't long before Truth hit the Lie Detector and got a clean victory. WHAT'S UP?

***

In the ring we see a collection of incense burners, bowls of fruit and colorful throw pillows. Lounging in the center is John Morrison, who welcomes us to The Palace Of Wisdom. "Hi, I'm John Morrison, and I once carried ten gallons of Arrowhead Spring Water up Mount Everest just to see which ice would win in a fight. It was a 60-minute Broadway and somehow Ric Flair walked out as Champion. Anyway, tonight I'll try to bring some inner peace to a struggling soul, and so please welcome my guest: Justin Gabriel.

Morrison says that he's noticed Gabriel's chakras are all out of alignment, and invites him to vent his issues. Gabriel talks about how frustrating it is that Miz continues to embarass him when he knows he's the superior wrestler, and the anger is waking up the wild animal inside. Morrison suggests a meditation mantra that the folks at home can chant along with them: 'Miz Is Trash.' They start 'meditating,' to this chant until The A-Lister himself and Seth Rollins crash their party. Miz is blue in the face, and rants that the two "idiot hippies," have no right to call him trash. He tells Morrison he is going to screw up his contendership at Hell In The Cell for Ziggler's title because he's been a choke artist his entire career. He also asks Gabriel to prove he's superior by talking about all his accomplishments, such as being US Champion, Tag Team Champion, WWE Champion, and Main Eventing at Wrestlemania. "Oh wait, I did all those things, because you're a LOSER!"

Gabriel looks like he's about to snap, but Morrison no-sells the taunts and suggests they return to their meditation. Miz is the one who finally loses his cool, and leads Rollins in a charge on the ring, but Morrison and Gabriel avoid their initial rush and quickly clearing the ring! The heels are forced to retreat.

***

The Usos vs Jack Swagger and Drew McIntyre! The Usos pleased the crowd with their Haka, but once they got in the ring Drew bum-rushed Jimmy for the early edge! Jimmy managed to recover with a monkey-flip counter and then followed up with a flurry of punches to try and overwhelm The Chosen One. Jimmy managed to get Drew into his corner, and he and Jey worked the double-team style, throwing in some crowd interaction to keep from looking heelish. Cole brought up that a win here for the Usos could be huge for momentum, as both teams will surely be signing up for the Tag Team Turmoil match Triple H announced earlier.

Looking to secure the win, Jey went for a crossbody off the ropes, but Drew dodged and delivered a deep arm drag, then tagged in Swagger. Jack grabbed Jey and started aggressive corner work which had the ref pushing to a four count several times, but the officials scolding just gave Drew cover to get in some cheap shots. Swagger transitioned to working Jey's ankle, both setting up the ankle lock and taking away his superkick, then hit a T-bone suplex to set Jey up for a Swagger bomb... but Jey rolled out of the way and dived for a Hot Tag to Jimmy! Drew ran in to intercept the fresh man, but ate a hard right hand knocking him to the outside! A flurry of chops and kicks put Jack on his back, but rather than cover him Jimmy ran the ropes to deliver a big Suicide Dive to Drew. Spectacularly, the still dazed Jey tagged himself back in off his brother's back in mid-flight! He went to the top rope and launched the Superfly Splash... but Swagger got out of the way! Jey tried to adjust, but landed right on his bad ankle, allowing Swagger to take advantage and immediately put him in the Patriot Lock! The Uso tapped out in mere moments, giving Swagger and McIntyre the win!

***

Backstage, Vince is leaving the building, but on his way to his limo he rambles to Johnny Ace about Zach Ryder's definance and demands his lacky come up with some way of putting him in his place. Laurinaitis promises he'll make that punk wish he'd never been born, and Vince snaps at him to NEVER say that word in his presence.

As they depart, we see that Miz and Rollins, still licking their wounds from the Palace of Wisdom brawl, were listening in. Rollins seems extremely intruiged, and suggests that perhaps this is an opportunity to curry favor with management. Miz scoffs at the notion. "The Brass in this company don't care about anyone but their hand-picked boys, and I don't fit their little profile. I'm not doing Vince any favors." Rollins tries to debate the topic, but Miz cuts him off: "Look Seth, let me explain something: if you bite off more than you can chew, The Miz won't be there to bail you out, and if I need bailing out, you better be there, or you can kiss your career goodbye. As long as you remember those two things, I'm fine with any extra-curriculars you want to try out. Clear?" Rollins nods.

***

THE MAIN EVENT! Alberto Del Rio (w/ Ricardo) and Dolph Ziggler (w/ Vikki Guerrero) vs Rey Mysterio (w/Goldust) and John Morrison (w/ Melina). Alberto Del Rio is brought to ringside by a limosine again, and when King sarcastically asks what happened to his fancy cars, Cole asks if he would turn down a limo Mr. McMahon was paying for just to drive himself. The action in this bout is fast and furious out of the gate, with Rey putting Ziggler through his paces, but a tag to Del Rio slows things down. He and Ziggler work together, Ziggler's amateur chops and Del Rio's MMA training allowing them to attack the neck, shoulder and arm with brutal efficiency, potentially setting Rey up for either a Cross Armbreaker or a Sleeper finisher.

Morrison and Goldust cheer on Rey and fire up the crowd, trying to give him the energy he needs to turn the tide, and finally Rey catches both heels in a glorious double Tornado DDT, planting both of them into the mat! Rey crawls for the tag, and Morrison reaches... but Del Rio catches his foot, dragging him back toward the INZUGIRI RIGHT TO THE TEMPLE! Del Rio collapses and Morrison tags in! Rey rolls out and Goldust checks on his shoulder, but the crowd's eyes are all on JoMo and his explosion of offense on Ziggler! The US Champion is dominated by kicks and strikes and a Moonlight Dive neckbreaker, and a Shotgun Dropkick puts Del Rio back on the canvas for another big pop! Morrison is on fire and he kips up and sets up Ziggler for Starship Pain, but The Show Off manages to roll to the outside... so Morrison hits him with a Corkscrew Splash from the top rope to the floor!

The ring is a wasteland as all four men are out of it, but its Del Rio who recovers first, and he goes to ringside looking for a chair! The official is too busy Counting 10 on Ziggler and Morrison to notice, but Rey and Goldust see him and move to intercept. Goldy wrestles the weapon out of Del Rio's hands and rears back for a big swing... but Del Rio ducks and the swing goes wide, clocking Rey Mysterio! Goldust drops the weapon in shock at what he's done, and Del Rio uses the opening to deliver a Double-Knee Backstabber to the Bizarre One! Back in the ring, Vikki Guerrero has the official's attention, so Del Rio slides Ziggler the chair, and he uses it to assist a Zig Zag, driving Morrison's head into the steel! He tosses the evidence and covers without the ref seeing a thing! 1! 2! 3! The Heels win!

***

ADR and Ziggler celebrate their victory... but their good time is interrupted by Triple H! The COO grabs a mic: "Sorry to interrupt your party, but I promised I'd have a challenger for Del Rio's Championship before this Raw was over. It took a lot to decide who should be #1 Contender. There's plenty of deserving guys in the back, but none of them seemed like the right fit for Raw's first new Brand-Exclusive Pay Per View. None of them seemed right to undo the damage to that title's credibility you and Vince have inflicted. None of them seemed like the guy who could take the fight to Alberto Del Rio. But then I woke up this morning, looked in the mirror, and realized: the answer was staring me right in the face." He gets a little smirk on his face as the crowd reacts to the hint, and Del Rio demands he name the challenger: "You want a name? How about THE ASSKICKER? How about THE KING... OF KINGS? Alberto Del Rio, your #1 Contender for the Universal Championship... IS TRIPLE! H! At Hell In The Cell... its Time! To Play! The Game!" The crowd erupts as TRI goes nose to nose with Alberto to close out Raw.

***

Overall Rating: B

aperion
May 15, 2007


Apologies, I have to post the mostly barebones version of SmackDown, and also I'm going to be completely MIA the next two weeks. The next event is Night of Champions, which isn't finished. If anyone wants to flesh out and finish it in my absence, feel free. You can adjust the card any way you like. I'll leave notes as to some things I have planned already.




quote:

-Christian opens the evening in Toronto. As this is his hometown, he upsells being home again, where his True Peeps are. He derides the fakers, including Sheamus who doesn't deserve a shot at his title. The crowd goes nuts for Christian, and the seemingly face-like man they came to know and love over the course of his career.

-AJ Lee goes over Rosa. This segment didn't drum up much response from the crowd.

-Sin Cara demands a real shot at the ICC at Night of Champions from Teddy Long despite being bandaged at the moment. Sin Cara struggled with his english, and seemed to try to cut a better promo than he was really capable of doing.

-Daniel Bryan beats a local jobber. Cody Rhodes is on commentary, explaining he's exposing Bryan for the fraud he is, that he hasn't been fighting actual superstars in his so-called open challenge. After the match, Cody steals the briefcase and blindsides Daniel Bryan with it, leaving Cody standing tall in the ring over him.

-Sheamus cuts his own promo for his match against Christian at NoC. Knowing the crowd would never take him at his word, he shows a clip of Christian whinging backstage after he left the ring, complaining about having to pander to those losers tonight, and "there's a reason I don't live here anymore" is spoken by Christian in the clip. This is remarked upon by Striker at the commentary booth.

-Josh Matthews interviews Cena about Mark Henry and dealing with his stable. Cena says that Henry's a bit different than other guys he's faced before, because Henry isn't above doing his own work. Cena respects that, but doesn't respect his toadies, Graves and Langston, getting between the two of them. He mentions Dean Ambrose, and his attack on Langston which Ambrose did on his own, and that Dean will have to deal with the consequences on his own. However, Cena turns hostile when asked about Xavier Woods relaying The Rock's recipe, saying it's stupid having a green kid get involved in their drama. Cena is well-composed, taking most of his issues in stride and is more down-to-earth than he's seemed in months. Showing a bit of humanity and humility over being beaten by Henry goes over extremely well.

-After the commercial break, Natalya comes out to ringside wearing a Calgary Flames jersey, and hoists on a stick a Toronto Maple Leafs jersey. She informs the crowd that the Flames are gonna be champs this season just like she is and makes fun of them for liking A Terrible Team. Gail Kim interrupts Natalya by stealing the Leafs jersey and puts it on, getting into the ring. Natalya gets in the ring with her, and a match is confirmed between the two of them....right now!

-Natalya and Gail pull at each others jerseys during the match until Natalya accidentally rips Gail's Maple Leafs jersey. Gail goes berserk and slams Nattie's face into a turnbuckle until the referee disqualifies her. Gail Kim continues her assault on Natalya, even pulling her jersey off and throwing her out of the ring. Natalya can be heard saying she'll see Gail at Night of Champions before withdrawing.

-The commentary booth begins recounting the sudden reappearance of Kane recently, first by dragging Randy Orton to Hell (or where ever Kane goes in his time off), then by continuing to attack Orton with no provocation. The two of them come out to the ring for a scheduled match, but it doesn't go on very long before the two of them leave the ring. They both are counted out, the match is declared a No Contest. However, despite this, they keep brawling in the arena. After they're pulled apart, Orton grabs a microphone. He demands to know what the hell got into Kane. Orton didn't think he was dumb enough to try to run into an RKO. Kane responds: "I HEARD YOUR VOICES AND THEY WANT TO BE FREE. SO I'M GONNA BREAK YOUR HEAD OPEN." Kane is removed from the building. Booker T confirms shortly afterwards that the two of them are going to have another match at Night of Champions, that one a No-Disqualification match so they can beat the hell out of each other till there's a winner.

-Teddy Long is in his office, exasperated at the amount of work going on at the moment. He tells the person on the other line that he's going to have to call back because Mark Henry, Corey Graves, Big E Langston drag Ambrose into Teddy's office, beaten up already. They demand he be fired for what he did to Langston, who's still wearing a neckbrace. Long refuses, as it looks like they already got back at Ambrose. Further, Long reminds them that they settle their problems in the ring, so Graves can face Ambrose at NoC. Ambrose refuses a 'gentleman's match', saying he's gonna dumpster Graves. Long agrees and sets up a Dumpster Match for the two of them, at Graves' consternation. Teddy reminds Henry that he's going to be too busy to watch because he still has to face John Cena again at NoC himself.

-After the commercial break, Christian waylays Sheamus in the back area, throwing him into the bricks a frew times before Security breaks them up quickly. Teddy Long sees this, and angrily calls a referee over and starts a Street Fight match and tells them to get into the ring to start it. Right now. It's a brutal slugfest that sees both men take normally-illegal shots from one-another. Christian eye-gouges Sheamus and puts him on the mat several times throughout the fight and seems to have it all well in hand until Sheamus hits Christian which takes him out of the fight long enough to be pinned. However, as Sheamus begins a victory walk up the ramp, Christian comes back and waylays him with a steel chair and beats the hell out of Sheamus for the loss. Christian is given his title back and he stands proudly over Sheamus on the catwalk to close out SmackDown with his non-victory, but ensured match at Night of Champions.

Overall ranking: B+

Christian's opening promo and Cena's interview were A* moments, and buoyed the evening overall. The matches were all very solid, but there was criticism of too much set-up for Night of Champions and not enough emphasis on the evening's matches.

Jenkem Delivery
Feb 8, 2005

Death created time to grow the things that it would kill


quote:

Impact starts off with a match! We've got Cheerleader Melissa with Sara Del Rey ringside going up against Tara with Brooke. Mickie James on commentary analyzing the match and bragging about how she's going to ruin Melissa's title tryout and cut her rear end from the cheerleading squad. Melissa keeps the upper hand against Tara, wearing her down with brutal shots and an inverted cloverleaf. Brooke tries to start poo poo with Del Rey but gets blasted with an elbow. Melissa shoots a thumbs up to Del Rey and destroys Tara with Butterfly Kisses (Cop Killer). Mickie snarls and stares daggers at Melissa.

******************************

Alex Shelley makes a jobber tap out with the Border City Stretch.

******************************

El Generico versus Hernandez for the TV Title. Generico faces off against the big man and gets tossed around the ring a bit but manages to change his strategy and uses a series of lucha arm drags and a springboard corkscrew DDT to gain the upper hand. The Ref gets knocked down by one of Generico's legs on the DDT and Sex Ferguson slips down through the crowd to ringside. Sex gets up on the apron and distracts Generico while Hernandez recovers and clubs him over the back of the head! Sex puts his size 16 boot on the top turnbuckle and motions for Hernandez to send the TV Champion into his waiting foot. Hernandez tries to whip Generico into the turnbuckle but Generico reverses it and sends Hernandez face first into Sex's boot! The Big man's unexpected momentum sends Sex tripping backwards off the apron. Hernandez staggers back dazed from the blow right into the waiting arms of Generico! Generico hits a half and half suplex on the big man as the ref makes his way to his feet. Generico quickly slides over and pins Hernandez! 1...2....3... Generico retains! Hernandez glares at Sex from the canvas, rage in his eyes.

******************************

"We cut to AJ and Sting searching backstage. AJ is frantic, screaming and tearing things apart as he looks for his beloved boys. ""KAZARIAN!?!?! DANIELS?!!?! YOU SONS OF BITCHES WHERE ARE YOU?! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY BOYS?!!"" Kazarian appears from a darkened side hallway, smiling. ""I'm right here, AJ."" AJ pounces on Kazarian and shoves him against the wall, pressing an elbow to his throat. ""WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH THEM?!!?! WHERE ARE MY BOYS?!"" Sting steps up behind AJ and puts a hand on his shoulder. ""AJ, think this through man don't do anything that will get your boys hurt."" AJ doesn't even turn to face Sting, his eyes locked in a stare with Kaz. ""I'm going to break every damned bone in his body until he leads me to them."" Frankie smiles, shifting a bit to ease the pressure on his throat so he can speak ""There's no need for violence AJ. I'll take you to them. Right now, in fact."" He says with a smile. AJ pulls his elbow back but quickly puts Kaz in a hammerlock. ""Lead us to them, now. And if you try any bullshit I'll break your arm!"" He nods to Sting ""Keep an eye out for that piece of poo poo Daniels."" Sting nods, pulling a baseball bat out of his trench coat. ""I've got your back AJ."" Kazarian tilts his head ""Shall we?""

The camera follows them as they twist and turn through a few hallways then come to a dressing room with the door slightly ajar. ""Your boys are just in here, AJ."" Sting steps in between them and the door. ""I'll go in first in case Daniels is waiting. Keep your eyes peeled."" AJ nods and Sting pushes the door open slowly with his bat, then with a flick of his wrist flips it all the way, slamming it against the wall. He steps in, holding the bat at the ready. He quickly pokes his head around. ""It's clear....they aren't in here."" AJ torques on Frankie's arm. ""What kinda sick joke is this?! Where are they?!!"" Frankie calmly nods towards a back corner. ""Tell your man to go look closer."" Sting scowls at Frankie and takes a few steps towards the corner ""There's something in there..it's a cardboard box...."" Sting goes closer and AJ shoves Frankie in through the door, trying to peer around him to get a better look. ""What the hell is this poo poo?!!"" Sting turns and holds a hand up to AJ. ""Don't come any closer, it might be a trap. I'll check it out."" He flips the bat around to use the bottom of it to gently move one of the flaps aside, keeping a step back. When nothing happens he slowly leans over and peers inside. Sting's face contorts into a look of horror as he stumbles backwards, falling back against the wall. ""Oh....oh god..""

AJ shoves Frankie to his knees, checking back over his shoulder at the open doorway then back to Sting. ""What the hell Sting? What's in there?!"" Frankie smiles ""You see AJ, I envy you, it's my sin. I envy the love you shared with your boys."" AJ kicks Frankie in the back ""SHUT UP!"" He shouts. ""Sting...Sting talk to me brother what's in there."" Sting tries to scramble to his feet, falling back down. ""AJ....AJ stay back man."" Frankie continues ""I envy you because I will never feel that love again. After you abandoned Fortune, after you turned your back on us it left a hole in my heart. I can no longer feel love AJ, all I feel is a bottomless pit of darkness where that love once was. It's so cold....so bleak...staring into that abyss."" AJ kicks him again. ""SHUT THE HELL UP!"" He looks back at Sting and the box. ""GOD DAMMIT STING TELL ME! WHAT'S IN THE BOX?!?! WHAT'S IN THE BOX?!!!!??!"" Sting backs away from the box, finally recovered from the shock. His face is aghast as he turns to AJ. ""AJ...AJ....just take a step back man don't do anything crazy?"" AJ tilts his head to the side, looking quizzically at Sting ""Crazy? What the hell are you talking about? WHAT'S IN THE loving BOX?!?!!?"" He shouts. Frankie looks over to Sting, then to AJ. ""I didn't tell the whole truth AJ, it was just a couple pieces of your boys in there. They're still alive. I don't have a problem with them, they're not the ones who hurt me. They're not the ones who abandoned me. I want to hurt you AJ, I want you to feel the blackness that I feel inside. It's the only thing that takes my mind off this unbearable pain and loss I have to live with.""

AJ looks at Frankie in horror as the full realization of the situation starts to hit him. ""DID YOU HURT THEM?!! DID YOU HURT MY BOYS?!"" Frankie shrugs ""I hurt them a little bit, but like I said they're still alive. If you ever want to see them again, you'll face me in a match at Bound for Glory. If you beat me, you can have your boys back. If I beat you....well I'm going to keep your boys AJ. I'm going to make you feel the loss and emptiness I feel. I'm going to watch you fill up with the blackness, and I'm going to enjoy every second of it..."" A sick, twisted smile crosses his face ""What do you say AJ? Do you truly care about your Boys, or will you discard them like you did Fortune?"" AJ howls in rage and Sting grabs him, trying to restrain AJ as he flails at Kazarian in rage. ""I'LL KILL YOU IF YOU HURT MY BOYS FRANKIE! I'LL DESTROY YOU! YOU WANT A FIGHT AT BOUND FOR GLORY?! YOU'VE GOT IT!!"" Frankie grins, raising his hands palms up ""See AJ, that wasn't so hard was it?"" A laugh comes from the doorway ""It was easy as pie!"" It's the Fallen Angel, Christopher Daniels!"" Sting lets go of AJ and both men look up at Daniels, momentarily taking their eyes off Kaz. He quickly slips a stun gun out of his pants and zaps AJ in the leg! AJ crumples into a heap as Sting looks down in shock, just in time for Daniels to sprint across the room and hit him with a Singapore Cane! Frankie hits AJ with the stun gun again, this time right at the base of his neck, causing the Tango Turkey to cry out in agony! He follows up his stun gun zap with a series of stomps. Daniels continues to hit Sting with the Singapore Cane, the sound of the bamboo on flesh resonating off the concrete walls. Suddenly a loud yell cuts through the noise, it's Kevin Steen!

Steen unloads on Daniels with right hands, causing him to drop the Cane and sending him to the floor. Sting grabs his bat and cracks it across Frankie's back! Frankie drops to his knees and goes for the stun gun but Sting hits his arm before he can grab it! The tables have turned and Kaz and Daniels face the wrath of Sting and Steen while AJ tries to get to his feet. Frankie and the Fallen Angel manage to scramble away, leaving Sting to check on AJ and Steen to taunt Daniels with his Singapore Cane as he slinks away. ""Leaving so soon? I was just getting started! Get your bald rear end back here you son of a bitch!""

******************************

Eddie Edwards defeats Magnus with a Boston Knee Party

******************************

"Austin Aries is backstage in street clothes, wallking down the hallway with a frustrated look on his face. He adjusts his jacket and wipes his hands through his hair, then walks up to a door marked with a nameplate: ""Chief Wellness Officer"". Aries slowly opens the door and steps inside. It's a small side office filled with various boxes stacked high along the walls, and a single piece of furniture. Two chairs on either side of a small folding table behind which sits the TNA Chief Wellness Officer Scott Steiner. Steiner leans back in his chair, looking at a handful of papers. He's wearing his normal ring gear, except for his lab coat with the sleeves cut off with his name and title embroidered on the left breast. Steiner shuffles the papers and puts them on the desk then points to the chair. ""Sit down, Aries"" he orders. Aries begrudginly takes a seat and glares across the table at Big Poppa Pump. A few awkward seconds of silence pass, then Aries jumps up.

""What the hell am I doing here? This is total bullshit, I don't do any drugs!"" Steiner stands up and points at Aries ""Shut the hell up and sit your rear end down! I'm the Chief Wellness Officer and you will show me some respect!"" Steiner shouts. Aries sits and shifts in his seat, visibly angry at being ordered around, holding his tongue for the moment. ""Nowm"" Steiner sits back down and picks up the papers. ""I brought you in here because your tests came back, and you don't have anything in your system!"" Aries laughs ""Then why the hell bring me in here? I haven't done anything wrong!"" Steiner shakes his head ""It's because you need more supplements! You've got a lovely physique! You think you can hold onto the X Division title with those puny arms? HELL NO! You need some Steinerizer!""

Steiner pulls out a tub of Steinerizer and puts it on the table. Aries recoils in horror ""What the hell? I'm not taking your chemical bullshit! Who knows what you put in there? Probably something to slow me down or worse! You want to drug me up and control me, don't you?!?! BISCHOFFO MADE YOU DO THIS, DIDN'T HE?!"" Steiner goes to grab Aries but he ducks out of the way. ""I know the truth! I know it all, Steiner! The real Steiner died in Puerto Rico from that throat injury. You're a fraud! You're a fake!"" Steiner flips the table over and goes after Aries, getting in the face of the smaller man. ""You think you know what happened in Puerto Rico? How about this, I'll tell you but you have to take a tub of Steinerizer!"" Aries strokes his goatee, eying Steiner then countering. ""I'll take it for a week."" Steiner adjusts his sunglasses. ""Deal."" Steiner and Aries both sit down, leaving the table flipped over. Steiner lets out a chuckle ""Well you were half right about Puerto Rico. I did die down there."" Aries' eyes go wide. ""I knew it.."" he gasped. ""One of my theories is finally proven right!"" Steiner shakes his head ""Half right, numbnuts. My heart stopped for just over three minutes on the operating table. I was legally dead, and I had one of those...experiences. I went into the place you go after you die"

Aries pulls back in confusion ""Underworld?"" He asks. ""Yeah. Hell, the Afterlife, whatever you call it. I went down there and came face to face with the man himself: The Grim Reaper, Death. He goes by many names but there he was right in front of me. He said I had the largest arms he'd ever seen, that my peaks were stronger than any mountain. He asked me to join him as his right hand man!"" Aries is enthralled at the story, leaning over the edge of his chair. ""Wh....what did you say?"" Steiner leans back in his chair. ""I told him Big Poppa Pump answers to no one, man or god. I challenged him to a match! Me versus him, right there. If I won, I'd get to come to life. If he won, I'd join him as his enforcer!"" Aries looks Steiner up and down now unsure if he is seeing a man of flesh or a man of...something else. ""Don't look at me like that you weirdo! I beat his rear end! I dropped Death on his head with a Steiner Screwdriver and put him in the Steiner recliner. I held him for what seemed like eons until his bitch rear end tapped out! Then next thing I know I woke up in a Puerto Rican hospital room. They said I had no chance, they said I would never survive but I did. And now I'm stronger than ever! My peaks have never been bigger. My freaks have never been more satisfied!""

Aries is taken agahst at the story. ""Please....let me....let me join you!"" Steiner's face turns to a look of disgust. ""Join me? Hell no! You're a creep! I don't want you hanging around me scaring off all the freaks. Now take your Steinerizer and get the hell out of here."" Steiner stands up and points in Aries' face ""And if you tell anyone about what I told you, I'll find you and make you regret it!"" Aries nods and grabs the container of Steinerizer off the ground, fumbling with the lid a bit as he steps out of the office only to face Eddie Edwards! Eddie goes to unleash a chop at Aries but he only succeeds at knocking the lid off the can of Steinerizer, sending a neon green powder all over Aries chest and face. Aries tries to blink the Steinerizer out of his eyes as Edwards goes to chop him again, this time connecting square on to Aries' chest! But the blow only makes a dull *THUD* sound, and Edwards immediately pulls his hand back in excruciating agony. Aries coughs a few times then smiles, opening his jacket to reveal a metal vest. ""I figured out how to keep you from sneaking up and chopping me again! I'm too smart for you, Edwards. Give it up!"" Edwards grimaces ""I'm not going to give up, I'll figure out another way to beat your rear end!"" Aries cocks his fist and licks his lips in anticipation then recoils in shock ""Ugh, what the hell is in this poo poo? It tastes like the floor of a chemistry lab!"" Edwards uses the momentary distraction to get away while Aries tries to clean the supplement off ""Oh god it's burning my skin! What the hell?"" He shouts."

******************************

Up next is Abyss versus Eric Young. Hogan comes down Abyss and sits down on commentary, trashing Bischoffo and making fun of Young. Abyss makes quick work of the fire headed Canadian and ends it with a black hole slam.

******************************

AJ Styles comes down, very angry and taped up from his beat down at the hands of Kazarian. His injuries give Gunner enough of an opportunity to keep things close. Gunner gets Styles up in the backbreaker rack, and Styles nearly taps but manages to slip out. Gunner goes for a lariat but AJ hits a phenomenal combo and lays him out, then hits the Spiral Flap for the pin!

******************************

Bischoffo comes out with a microphone, looking absolutely pissed. He takes a moment to collect himself then shouts "ANDERSON GET YOUR rear end OUT HERE!!" Anderson comes out, smirking at Bischoffo. Bischoffo shakes his head in disgust. "Wipe that smile off your face you idiot! How dare you make a fool of me! How dare you walk out on a match like that! You know what I want, you know what the fans want! THAT'S VIOLENCE! And you dared to deprive us of it by running away like a coward." Anderson shakes his head and holds up a hand "Woah woah woah there Enrico! I was just doing the smart thing and getting out of there to catch my breath. I just happened to accidentally get counted out. Mistakes happen, no one's perfect!" Bischoffo's scowl turns to a smile. "Oh, a mistake? You just happened to run 3/4 of the way up the ramp and forgot to come back in to break the count? I think the mistake was made by me, giving you the opportunity to turn tail and run like a coward." Anderson smiles and shrugs "Like I said, no one's perfect." Bischoffo takes a deep breath, his face turning a shade of crimson at the sarcasm being thrown his way. "Well, I won't make the same mistake twice! There will be no escape for you at Bound For Glory. You're going to face Samoa Joe, and there will be no way for you to run away!" Anderson chuckles, shaking his head "A steel cage, Enrico? I can climb out the top! It's easy to escape! Come on, I expected better than that from you." Bischoffo chuckles then glances back at Anderson, his eyes filled with a look of giddiness. "Oh, you don't get it do you? You'll see at Bound for Glory. But first, you need to get a little taste of comeuppance tonight. It's you versus The Hardys and my new warrior Bobby Lashley. Oh yes, and it's RIGHT loving NOW!"

The Hardys and Bobby Lashley versus Mr. Anderson in a 3 on 1 match. Bischoffo's Boys proceed to beat the everliving poo poo out of Anderson, giving him no quarter as they take turns pounding him. Lashley hits a spear, Matt hits a Twist of Fate, and Jeff seals the deal with a swanton bomb and all three stand and pose on Anderson's prone body for the pin.

******************************

Sting interview with Ric Flair. Sting talks about how Steiner has fought and clawed his way to earn a title shot, but he got lucky in the tournament. His luck is going to run out at Bound for Glory. Sting has seen all the film on Big Poppa Pump, he's going to be ready to defend his title no matter what!

******************************

Scott Steiner comes out to face Crimson. Crimson comes in with a flurry of shots on Steiner, trying to swarm him with his speed and length advantage. Unfortunately, Crimson moves in a bit too close and ends up eating a variety of suplexes from Steiner. Steiner hits a belly to belly sending Crimson into the turnbuckles, then hits a butterfly float over suplex to the center of the ring and slaps on the Steiner Recliner. Crimson quickly taps as Steiner cranks on his neck and spine.

******************************

Samoa Joe with Okato versus Jeff Jarrett. Joe and Jarrett go back and forth initially but Joe wears down Jarrett with a series of strikes and power moves. Jarrett grabs his guitar as the ref's back is turned and Okato hops on the apron to try and get the ref's attention. Unfortunately his English is just not good enough to convey his message and the ref ends up arguing with him. Jarrett whiffs on the kabong attempt, Joe ducking underneath and taking Jarrett's back with the Coquina Clutch. Jarrett fights but Joe manages to get the body scissors and Double J has no choice but to tap. We're out of time folks, see you on Xplosion!

Impact was a B show


quote:

Mauro on PBP, Desmond on Color, Excalibur as Third Man

Eric Young cuts a promo and basically calls Crimson and Magnus losers and says Generico doesn't deserve the TV title

Elgin and Cobb vs Future Shock (Bay bay). Evans and Puma come down and interfere devolving into a brawl

Io Shirai defeats Angelina Love

Happyman
Jul 20, 2011

Say, do you take your mask off when you go to the bathroom?

September Week 3
WWE RAW: 3.96 (+0.13)
WWE SmackDown!: 3.52 (-0.31)
TNA Impact: 1.18 (+0.17)

September Week 4
WWE RAW: 3.93 (-0.03)
WWE SmackDown!: 3.56 (+0.04)
TNA Impact: 1.19 (+0.01)

WWE Night of Champions: 330.096 buys

Happyman fucked around with this message at Jun 5, 2017 around 06:57

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

You're tense, I'm calm. You apply excessive force, I
*snap*
OHHHH HECKUMS


Back to being the A show!

NoC is the next show to be posted, right?

Happyman
Jul 20, 2011

Say, do you take your mask off when you go to the bathroom?



Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes MitB Open Challenge -- DBry retains but sells a serious injury in the process.

---

Dean Ambrose vs. Corey Graves in a Garbage Day Match -- Graves wins with interference from Langston and throw Ambrose in the dumpster. Post-match promo shows the dumpster being emptied out, but Ambrose escapes moments before it happens.

---

Barret/Sin Cara for ICC -- Barrett DQs himself in this match to retain.

---

Natalya/Gail Kim Women's Champion -- Gail Kim gets in decent amounts of offense before losing.

---

Kane enters in a new, leathery mask. Orton nails two RKOs on Kane, and he sits up from both of them. Kane injures the ref in the process of savaging Orton, and hits a Chokeslam on him, but no count happens while the ref is down. Kane gets a chair from out of the ring to beat Orton even more, but Orton counters then RKOs Kane onto the chair, and the referee recovers in time to 3-count Kane out. Kane sits up moments after the bell rings once again to everyone's surprise.

---

Edge and Teddy Long agree to a contract. Edge will do guess commentary on some matches on SmackDown. Christian welcomes his best friend back. Edge mentions he'll be sitting in on some of his matches on SD. Christian looks uncomfortable at that but doesn't say anything about it.

---

We get a classic WWE video promo set to, I don't know, Chevelle or something. Christian's successful defenses against Orton, his newfound pride and arrogance, which is abruptly cut off by Sheamus' declaration of intent and the champ's attack on the challenger. It shows their duelling promos and Sheamus chasing Christian out of the ring in Wichita, and then Christian beating the hell out of Christian backstage in Toronto. Christian is seen holding his title up in defiance as we cut back to the PPV feed.

---

"Sheamus vs. Christian is a vicious bout, for a standard singles match. Sheamus fights with an almost feral intensity, but it's clear that he's working on almost pure will - his movement has a haggard quality, and he breathes heavily, clearly still affected by the champ's brutal chair attacks from last Smackdown. Christian seems stunned by this showing for the first half of the match, as Sheamus gets up easily from most of his offense and gives better than he gets, battering the champion. Ten minutes into the match, however, Christian starts putting distance between them, flitting to the outside to dodge Sheamus' onslaught, and it soon becomes apparent that this isn't simple avoidance. Sheamus' mask of determination seems to slip as his physical condition catches up with his resolve.

A few minutes of skirmishes from the champion and it's clear Sheamus has lost his momentum, running half a second too late to counter most of Christian's offense. He gets a second win minutes from the finish, fighting valiantly and hitting a desperation White Noise that's not enough to get the 3. A rattling backhand from the champ leaves the challenger dazed. Christian climbs to the top rope and, after pointing at Sheamus, leaps from the top, connecting with a spectacular Flying Tornado DDT. Sheamus is ragdolled, and it's enough to get the 3."

---

Beth Phoenix bends the knee to Natalya and becomes her enforcer.

---

Henry/Cena II -- Mark Henry beats Cena clean after at least a few finishers by both fighters. A knock-down, drag-out fight.

B

Jenkem Delivery
Feb 8, 2005

Death created time to grow the things that it would kill

I like Mark Henry winning clean. I don't like that he doesn't have the sexual chocolate gimmick

Jenkem Delivery
Feb 8, 2005

Death created time to grow the things that it would kill


quote:

Impact opens with the Premier Athlete Tony Nese standing in the ring. Suddenly, unfamiliar music blasts through the Impact Zone! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LO3jBivegxw Who the hell is this? We're getting a new debut in the Impact Zone? IT'S KENNY OMEGA! What's he doing here in the Impact Zone?!?!! Omega is wearing black trunks with Japanese writing on the back, with black boots and kickpads. He makes his way to the ring and stares down Nese, pointing at him and yelling something the microphones can't pick up. The bell rings and Kenny quickly sprints across the ring, hitting Nese with a dropkick, maintaining the upper hand throughout the match. Nese finally gets some breathing room and charges but Kenny holds his hand up and shouts out "STOP!!" freezing Nese in his tracks. The momentary distraction as all Omega needs to hit an Enziguri! Nese falls to his knees as Kenny charges up his power meter, then hits the Premiere Athlete with a Gohadoken, sending him tumbling back. Nese tries to use the ropes to get to his feet but Kenny gives him no quarter, sprinting across the ring and connecting with a Tiger Knee! Nese crumples into a heap and Omega stands over him, an ecstatic grin across his face as his eyes are filled with sick delight. Omega points to the corner and slashes his thumb across Nese's throat. Omega drags the Premiere Athlete's barely conscious body and places him on the top rope. Omega gets onto the second rope and picks up Nese in the Electric Chair position, then tosses him up in the air and catches him in a rear waistlock, then german suplexes him off the ropes! AVALANCHE CROYT'S WRATH!! Nese bounces off the canvas and lays limp as Kenny pins him: 1....2....3! Kenny is your winner! Paramedics rush into the ring and take Nese away on a stretcher as Omega celebrates! Kenny Omega has made his presence know by destroying Tony Nese! He seems to revel in the damage inflicted upon his unprepared opponent. Surely Enrico Bischoffo will take notice of Kenny's newfound penchant for violence

******************************

"Prince Puma, Haskins, and Jeff Cobb are in the ring to face Michael Elgin, Okato (With Samoa Joe), and Kyle O'Reilly. Puma starts out against Elgin, who manages to use his size and strength to smother Puma, sending him flying across the ring with throws and suplexes. Puma manages to scramble away just long enough to tag in Mr. Olympic Jeff Cobb, who grins ear to ear at Elgin. The two hosses square off in the middle of the ring and immediately start blasting each other with forearms! Two of the strongest men in all of professional wrestling are going toe to toe in a test of fighting spirit! Elgin seems to finally stagger Cobb with a particularly loud shot and goes to follow up with a discus lariat but Cobb ducks just in time to avoid getting decapitated! He grabs Elgin in a rear waistlock and picks him up, then dangles him in a deadlift position. Elgin flails helplessly as Cobb gutwrench suplexes the Big Boy, then rolls over and deadlifts him up for another....and another! The other 4 participants watch dumbstruck as Mr. Olympic shows off the strength that got him to the 2004 Athens Olympics! Cobb goes for the pin: 1...2... Elgin kicks out! Cobb argues with the referee while Elgin scrambles to his corner and tags in Kyle O'Reilly! O'Reilly hops in and fakes Cobb out with an open palm job, causing him to cover up as O'Reilly unleashes a kick to the chest! The sound of kickpads on flesh echoes through the Impact Zone as Kyle unloads with series of kicks and takes the Mr. Olympic down with a sweep! Kyle goes for the pin: 1......Cobb kicks out! Kyle quickly pivots and takes Cobb's outstretched arm and goes for the cross armbreaker!

Cobb's ground skills kick in and he locks his hands, trying to keep O'Reilly from straightening his arm out. He goes to deadlift Kyle but as O'Reilly's shoulders come off the mat he slides his foot over and starts kicking Cobb in the face with the heel of his boot! Cobb's grip weakens and he falls forward right into Kyle's guard! Kyle wraps his legs around the back of Cobb's head and traps the arm for a combo triangle/arm bar! Haskins and Puma realize Cobb is in deep water and start shouting at him to get him to roll to the ropes! Cobb howls in agony and manages to start scooting towards the ropes, getting a toe on them just in time to break the hold! Cobb manages to tag in Haskins who catches O'Reilly with a shotgun dropkick, sending the mixed martial artist sprawling back into his own corner. Okato tags Kyle on the shoulder and comes in to hit a picture perfect dropkick of his own! Okato follows up with an elbow drop and goes for the pin: 1...2.....No Haskins kicks out! Okato works him over with a few strikes and goes to lock in Red Ink. Puma quickly springboards in to break up the hold and all of the participants storm the ring and we have a brawl! The referee manages to gain control and after some tags Cobb and Elgin are back in. Cobb sends Elgin into the ropes and hits a Wrath of the Cobb! He goes for the pin on the Big Boy: 1....2...3! Cobb, Haskins, and Puma win!"

******************************

We return from commercial to find Kenny kneeling in a darkened room backstage, the only light coming from a multitude of flickering candles placed around the floor. Kenny is still breathing hard from his match, his face contorted into a gleeful grin. "Master....I have done what you asked. I showed them what I am capable of. I made my first sacrifice to you in the Impact Zone, in front of the world!" The camera moves to a shadowy corner of the room, interrupted by a flicker of movement and a dry, raspy chuckle. "Yes, you have. I am pleased." A figure emerges into the dim light, its face concealed by a hooded robe. "They are all on notice that we have arrived, that we will bring a new level of violence and destruction to TNA. We have a long road ahead of us, and we will face many challenges and enemies who will try to stop us. But with my guidance, you can one day be champion and together we will rule the Impact Zone." Kenny's eyes light up at the mention of the TNA World Title. "Yes Master, I am eager to learn from your wisdom and experience. I am ready to begin the journey and one day hold that Aztec gold high above my head and declare victory in your name...."
Eric Young and Crimson come down to face a couple of jobbers. They destroy them, and get into a shoving match over who gets to pin the poor destroyed jobber. Crimson clocks Young and gets the pin!

******************************

Austin Aries comes out for an interview with Ric Flair. Ric welcomes the X Division Champion to the ring and asks about his plan to defeat Eddie Edwards at Bound For Glory. Aries explains he has a new nutrition and supplement plan and feels amazing. In fact, he looks noticeably more ripped and aggressive. He feels so good, he issues an Open Challenge to anyone who wants to come down and face him for the title right now!

Adam Cole (BAYBAY) answers the call! Cole comes down the ring and Aries doesn't even wait for the bell, he starts furiously pounding on Cole! He goes for the discus elbow but Cole ducks and hits Aries with a superkick! Cole hits a snap suplex then goes for a quick pin! 1...2... no Aries kicks out! Aries is pissed! He answers with an STO and tries to lock in the False Flag but Cole gets to the ropes! Cole gets up and eats a Japanese arm drag and Aries unleashes a series of stomps on the prone Cole! Cole manages to pick Aries leg and locks in a figure four! Aries screams in pain, then turns the figure four over to reverse it on Cole! The action goes back and forth fot a bit longer then Aries reaches his boiling point and shoves Cole into the referee, knocking him to the canvas. He then goes for the Eye Opener, gouging the poo poo out of Cole's eyes repeatedly! Cole is blind and staggers into a dicsus elbow, then gets locked into the False Flag. He has no choice but to tap!

******************************

Bobby Lashley versus El Generico for the TV title. Bischoffo's Bloodborne warrior quickly overpowers the wily Luchador and tosses him around like a ragdoll. Lashley goes to gorilla press Generico but he reverses it into a DDT! Gunner sneaks down to ringside and hops on the apron, distracting Lashley while Generico hits a half and half suplex. Lashley is dazed! Generico hits a Helluva kick sending Lashley into the corner. He smacks the turnbuckle, pumping the crowd up! Generico picks Lashley up and hits the BRAINBUSTAHHHHHHHHH!! Generico goes for the pin: 1....2....3! Generico retains!

******************************

Beer Money come down to face Hernandez and Jack Evans with Team 3D and Briscoes on Commentary. Beer Money dominate the match, ragdolling Evans all over the place and keeping Hernandez down. They end up hitting the big man with Drinking While Investing! Roode goes for the pin: 1....2...3. Beer money are your winners!

The Briscoes lunge across the table at Team 3D and start brawling! Beer Money come down from the ring and join in the fray, it's absolute mayhem as Mauro, Tenay, and Taz are forced to flee the table to avoid getting injured!

******************************

We cut to Enrico Bischoffo sitting in his office with Kazarian and Daniels. All three men are drinking tequila and laughing. "So....so you cut off their ears and taunted Styles with them?" Bischoffo says through choking laughs. Tears start forming at the corners of his eyes from laughing so hard. Kazarian chuckles "Yup, did you see him blubbering like a baby? I'm pretty sure he pissed himself when I hit him with the stun gun!" They all break out in another round of laughter. Daniels points to Bischoffo "We would have beaten the living poo poo out of him too if that fat rear end Steen didn't come in and sneak attack me!" Bischoffo laughs. "Ok...ok....here's the deal. If he wants the Boys back so badly, he can face Frankie in a boys in a shark cage match! We'll suspend them above the ring and the first one to lower them down with a crank gets to keep them!" Frankie grins "That's brilliant, I'm going to annihilate him while those stupid Boys are blubbering like a couble of babies above his head!" Enrico smiles and sips his tequila "Of course it's brilliant, I thought of it! Also Daniels, you will get a chance for revenge on Steen at Bound for Glory. In fact, since you've been such a big fan of Singapore Canes I'll make them legal! It's a Singapore Cane Match!" Daniels fist pumps in glee "Yes! Yes! I'll whack that bloated piece of garbage around like a pinata!" The three men clink glasses as the camera fades out.

******************************

Kevin Steen versus Brother Pope D'Angelo Dinero with Kazarian ringside on commentary. Steen taunts Daniels throughout the match as he dominates the newest member of Team 3D. Daniels asks Steen about his parenting blog having advice on dealing with your kid watch you get your rear end kicked by Scott Steiner. Steen hits Dinero with the Steenalyzer and a Papa Powerbomb for the win!
Samoa Joe versus Bully Ray. Ray tries to brawl with Joe but ends up eating a series of brutal strikes. The action goes back and forth for a bit till Joe hits Ray with a roundhouse kick, knocking him out. He goes to lock in the Coquina Clutch but it's clear Ray isn't even conscious! The ref stops the match, Joe is the winner!

******************************

Hogan gets on the mic and challenges Bischoffo to come down and have one of his minions fight Jarrett for the right to determine the stipulation at Bound for Glory. Bischoffo comes out with the Hardys and agrees. RING THE BELL

Matt Hardy with Jeff Hardy and Bischoffo at ringside versus Jeff Jarrett with Abyss and Hogan at Ringside. Hogan slips Jarrett a pair of brass knuckles which Jarrett uses to knock out Mattanza and get the win.

Hogan Abyss and Jarrett slink away to the top of the ramp. Hogan smiles "The match to determine control of TNA at BFG? IT'S GOING TO BE A MONSTER'S BALL MATCH BROTHER"

A B- show



Mauro on PBP, Desmond on Color, Excalibur as Third Man

quote:

Elgin defeats Jack Evans with a Big Boy bomb and suffers an injury that slows the match down

Alex Shelley defeats Sex Ferguson after Hernandez interferes

Kenny Omega defeats Mark Haskins

Post match interview, Taz interviewing Kenny. Kenny hints that he is working for a higher power.

El Generico vs Crimson vs Magnus vs Hernandez for the TV title. Match ends in a count out as the four men brawl into the crowd

Jenkem Delivery fucked around with this message at Jul 10, 2017 around 16:01

Sanguinia
Jan 1, 2012

#RXT REVOLUTION~!
2000



future scoopin'...


To tired for full formatting, but enjoy!



Raw for September Week 4 posted:


BEHOLD THE KING! HHH opens the show, saying he's here to clarify the question that's been on everyone's mind since he declared he was #1 Contender last week: will that Title Match against Del Rio be HELL? IN THE CELL? The answer... is yes. "In two weeks, Alberto, your life is going to change forever. You're going to face a match unlike any other, against an opponent unlike any other. Nothing you've done before has prepared you for what's coming. I know what it takes to win that match. I know what it takes to SURVIVE that match. And you don't know a drat THING about what's coming. That's why Hell In The Cell... is gonna be Game. Ov-."

Triple H drifts off as the crowd goes insane... BECAUSE CM PUNK HAS ENTERED THE ARENA! He makes his way down the stairs with the WWE Championship slung on his shoulder, and soon takes a seat in the front row VIP corner, putting his feet up on the barricade. Triple H looks down at Punk with an amused expression. "Get caught in traffic kid? You missed half of the opening promo, now you're not gonna know what's going on." Punk simply shrugs and gestures for him to continue. Triple H shakes his head. "You know what, I've got a better idea. As much as the WWE Universe loves to hear me talk... I'm thinking they want to hear YOU talk a hell of a lot more. So why don't you step into this ring, and set off one of those... Pipe Bombs?"

The fans go ballistic even as Punk (somewhat sardonically) begs off Triple H's invitation. But this impasse doesn't last, because Vince McMahon storms out from behind the curtain! "GET THAT CAMERA OFF THAT SON OF A BITCH! I WON'T HAVE HIM FILMED ON MY TV SHOW!" Vince raves all the way down the ramp and gets in Triple H's face, but Hunter calmly snatches the mic from Vince's hands. Punk lets out a loud WOOP, playing obnoxious sports fan to the delight of the audience. Vince looks like he's going to go down and strangle Punk, but Hunter grabs his shoulder. Unexpectedly, Punk gestures toward Triple H... HE WANTS A MIC!

Vince is outraged, but Triple H silences him with a glare, and delivers it. Punk lets the tension build for a moment... then speaks. "Well, here we are, huh Vince? All your power, all your money, and I'm right back here, on Monday Night Raw, with this microphone, speaking to the people, and I am STILL the WWE Champion. The only difference is now, you don't own me anymore, but I still own the legacy of your entire company. I won, Vince. You lost." Despite turning beet red Vince refuses to speak or even look at Punk. "You know, I can play this game forever. The purse I won by winning this title at Summerslam can buy a lot of plane tickets. I can show up to every Monday Night Raw for YEARS... unless I get board with it and start putting MY championship up from grabs on other people's TV shows... BROTHER." Vince's AND Hunter's eyes go wide at the reference, but the Chairman still won't speak. "But I will admit to one thing, Vince; I've had this urge lately to give you one last word before I walk away, to stand eye to eye with you one last time. So I came here tonight to offer you a... lets call it a parley. At Hell in the Cell, I will meet you in this ring, and we can finish this once and for all!" The crowd blows up at this. "We can settle it with words. We can even settle it with fists if you want. But, let me make one thing clear: If you say no, I can live with it. You know why? Because I hold all the cards. If you agree to meet with me, your little campaign to pretend I never existed finally collapses, and I win. But if you don't, I walk away with this title FOREVER... and I still win. So I leave it entirely in your hands. The question is: do you, Vince McMahon, have the balls to settle your feud... with the WWE Champion?"

Punk doesn't even wait for Vince to reply before he starts going back up the arena stairs. Vince is in an absolute fugue state as he wrestles with Punk's invitation... until finally he shouts "ALRIGHT DAMNIT! HELL IN THE CELL! ONE WAY OR ANOTHER WE'RE GOING TO STEP INTO THIS RING, AND PUT AN END TO THIS FIASCO! ONE WAY OR ANOTHER! I'LL SHOW THE ENTIRE GOD drat WORLD WHO THE BETTER MAN IS BETWEEN VINCE MCMAHON AND... AND C! M! PUUUUUNK!" As if his name was the magic word, Punk pauses at the top of the stairs... and hoists his title belt high without turning back. The pop is nothing short of legendary. The camera zooms on Punk's back, the words Best In The World on his shirt, his title. The camera zooms on Vince, red faced, frothing... and Triple H very casually trying to inch himself into the frame. But nobody cared about that.

***

The first match of the night was Justin Gabriel vs Curt Hawkins. They put on a basic but pretty exciting match with some crowd pleasing spots that showed off great in-ring chemistry. Gabriel eventually put Hawkins away with the 450 in a great warm-up bout.

***

Miz comes out after the match and runs down Gabriel, telling him he's not in the league of a former World Champion. Gabriel ask if he's so far beneath Miz, why does Miz have to cheat to beat him? "Actually, don't answer that Miz. I don't really care if you cheat against me. Because every time I fight, I get better, and eventually I'm going to be so good that even your underhanded garbage tactics won't make a difference. Then I'll be World Champion and you'll be exactly where you are now: sitting in the gutter, talking about how you used to be great." Miz snapped at this and rushed the ring, but thinks better of it as Gabriel hunkers down, practically begging him to step up. He talks trash as he retreats, telling Gabriel to wait until the Pay Per View.

***

Ace Reporter Gregory Helms asks people backstage if they have any leads on Kassius Ohno. Unfortunately, he runs into Derrick Bateman and the Bellas! Bateman gets right in Helms face... and suggests he do an exclusive interview with him. This seems to stun the Bellas, who ask Bateman if he recognizes who he's talking to. Bateman says of course: its Ace Reporter Gregory Helms. The twins slap their foreheads in tandem, as it seems their boy toy cannot see through Helms paper-thin disguise.

Getting a little cocky, Helms says Bateman can start by telling him how it felt to have his rear end WHOOPED by returning WWE legend The Hurricane last week. Bateman storms off at this question, and the Bellas tell Helms that he'd better have more protecting him than a pair of fake glasses next time. Once they leave, Helms berrates himself, and resolves to remain a Mild Mannered Reporter from now on. "The Hurricane won't be coming back again."

***

After commercial, Michael Cole shows us footage of an attack backstage which took place during the break: Zach Ryder, while speaking with WWE Officials about a scheduled match, is ambushed by Seth Rollins! Seth goes right for Zach's weak knee before slamming him head-first into a wall! Ryder fights back until a crowd of security and other wrestlers break them up. King reminds us that Seth has been hoping to curry favor with Mr. McMahon, and going after the defiant Ryder may be his next step.

***

Backstage, we find Richie Steamboat, who is looking sullen. His father Ricky tells him that he can't give up just because he's down 3-1, because a Best of Seven isn't over until its over. Richie confesses that his confidence is in the tank because in their last match Rene Dupree beat him strait up: no cheating, no low blows, he was just the better man.

"Richie, did you know that between the NWA, WCW and WWE I've held 13 singles Championships? You know how I became a 13 time Champion? By losing my Championship 12 times. You're not going to be the better man every night, son. I must have fought Ric Flair 200 times, and frankly he won a lot more of those matches than I did. But I never quit. I never went into that ring believing he would beat me, no matter how many times he'd done it before. Your career is just starting, and in this sport there are never any garuntees of victory. But what makes a champion... what makes a DRAGON... is having the heart to keep fighting! Now get out there, and show Rene Dupree that YOU ARE A DRAGON!"

***

Richie Steamboat v Rene Dupree! Richie was fired up after his father's words, and pushed the pace right from the bell. Rene was on his back foot until he managed to sneak a low blow behind the ref's back, and rolled Ricky up! 1! 2! KICK OUT! Dupree seemed furious and pounded on Richie for portracted heat after his dirty trick failed. For true insult, Dupree then slapped on the Figure Four, looking to win the series with his father's greatest's rival's finisher! Ricky clapped and cheered for his son, trying to will him to the ropes... and Richie made the break! Off the rope break, Richie surged with a last gasp of offense, blowing Dupree away with strikes and clothesline, until finally going up top and hitting the Dragon Crossbody! 1, 2, 3! Richie stays alive and pushes the series to match 6!

***

Backstage, Otunga and Axel observed as various teams signed the contract for slots in Tag Team Turmoil. John Laurenaitis appears tells them they shouldn't worry. "After all, its entirely possible that you boys MIGHT just be the last team out of the gauntlet. For that matter, those boys in Air Boom MIGHT just be first team out and have to fight the entire division to get to you. After all, anything is possible, and that's an Ace Fact."

The Tag Champs get smug looks on their faces as Santino Marella enters. Despite not having found the Tag Wrestling Master, he signs up anyway and promises he'll have one in time for the match. Johnny Ace says if that's how Santino feels, then he shouldn't mind having a little singles competition tonight to get warmed back up after his vacation. He orders Santino to the ring for an immediate match against a surprise opponent.

***

After commercial, Santino came out to the ring to a big pop after his excursion to Europe, and happily waving all through his power-walk. However his joy turned to resignation when his mystery opponent was revealed: Trumpets and a stretch limousine herald the arrival of Alberto Del Rio, the Universal Champion, for a non-title bout!

Alberto Del Rio (w/ Ricardo Rodriguez) vs Santino Marella! Del Rio seemed more amused than anything at the start, cockily countering all Santino's early offense before taking control of the match, goading the crowd through his wear-down spots. Suddenly, Santino countered into a small package! 1..2..KICKOUT AT 2.9! Santino and Del Rio both emerge from the cradle with a look of shock on their faces, as if neither can believe he came that close to upsetting the champ. Enraged, Del Rio laid into Santino, nearly getting disqualified as the ref forcibly seperated them.

Del Rio did not take this interference kindly, and got right in the ref's face, browbeating the offical for a long stretch of time before finally turning back to Santino...AND TAKING A COBRA RIGHT TO THE THROAT! Cover! ONE! TWO! THR--NO, DEL RIO GOT A FOOT ON THE ROPES! Santino looked to the skies for help as Ricardo pulled Del Rio out of the ring to help him collect himself. Santino pursued and tried to bull rush Del Rio, but the champ dodged and Santino hit the ring post. He then grabbed Santino off the floor and threw him back in the ring, crawling in to immediately apply the Cross Arm Breaker to the damaged shoulder. Santino did his best to gather the energy from the crowd, but in the end had no choice but to tap. Not satisfied with just the win, Del Rio held the hold after the bell but eventually released him so he could shove the wounded man out of the ring and pose with the Universal title."

***

Rollins and Miz meet up backstage, and Miz berates Rollins, asking where he was when he confronted Gabriel at the top of the show? Rollins apologizes to Miz, and says he didn't think Miz wanted him there for that. After all, it was such a wise decision to make Gabriel THINK a fight was coming only to leave the guy stewing rather than doing an expected ambush. Miz says that flattery will only get Rollins so far when he's trying to bullshit his boss, and tells him to be there next time, to which Rollins agrees.

They move toward the locker room, and Rollins starts to talk, louder than strictly necessary, about the announcement of the Hell in a Cell match earlier. He says it will be gratifying to see Mr. McMahon's champion take on a legend like Triple H in the Cell. Miz notes that no matter who wins they'll be hurting afterward, which is good news for him. Rollins "suggests" that he would love the opportunity to have a match inside the Cell himself, especially if it meant he could get his hands on that punk Zach Ryder. Miz asks why he's talking so loudly as they step into the locker room... and the camera swings around the corner to see that Mr. McMahon was speaking with some of the booking staff, and overheard every word Rollins said. He tells his lackeys to buzz off and gets a scheming look on his face."

***

Otunga, McGillicuty, McIntyre and Swagger vs Air Boom and The Usos! The semi-main event is high-octane high-spot action, as the four strongest teams of the tag division show off their skills and look for momentum going toward Tag Team Turmoil. Tags come quickly and furiously, as do signature spots, but Drew and Jack seem to have ulterior motives, as they work to infuriate Air Boom with taunts and general heelishness. Kofi and Evan rise to their challenge and go two-on-two in the middle of the ring.

The situation grows chaotic as the ref tries to get the two teams to back off and return to their corners, but Air Boom ignores the official and dump the two heels out of the ring, and follow it up with tandem sentons! Not to be left out, the Usos hit the ropes and jump out with Tandem Topes, adding to the pile of bodies! The Tag Champs observe the car wreck at ringside... and immediately roll out, pick up the legal man (Jimmy Uso), and hit him with the Backbreaker/Elbow Drop combo! Otunga covers for an easy 3 to the chagrin of the audience, giving the Tag Champs a critical victory.

***

After the last commercial, its The Main Event! Dolph Ziggler (w/ Vikki) vs Rey Mysterio (w/ Goldust)! These two put on another absolute clinic, showcasing their chemistry. Rey counter's Ziggler's initial attempt at a ground game with a rare display of Lucha-style grappling, heavy on flip reversals. Frustrated, Ziggler picks up his pace and comes out ahead on several exchanges, particularly sticking a power slam counter to a springboard crossbody. However, despite taking several hard impacts Rey refuses to stay down!

The action gets more heated as Vikki starts screeching instructions to Dolph, while Goldust claps loudly to get the crowd behind Rey. Rey dodges a Superkick with a Matrix-style backbend, then drops the offbalance US Champion onto the ropes! He dials up the 619... but Dolph catches the kick and flings Rey across the ring like a sack of potatos! Rey collides with the ref and they both go down! Dolph takes a moment before he realizes the official is out of it... and then calls for Vikki to bring him the US title belt! Vikki runs to fetch the gold... and is intercepted by Goldust, who sneers at her so grusomely that she immediately flees! Goldust retrieves the title belt himself and hits the ring, bearing down on Ziggler who begs off in a truly craven display. Rey finally recovers, and stumbles over to his friend, grabbing Goldusts arm to stop him from interfering, show true class and sportsmanship... AND GOLDUST SLAMS THE US TITLE INTO HIS SKULL!

Rey goes out like someone hit a switch, and Goldust drops Dolph's title and rolls out of the ring without comment to echoing boos. Dolph is stunned for only a moment before getting rid of the evidence and covering Mysterio! The half-conscious ref sees the cover and counts 1.... 2.... 3! Dolph Ziggler has pinned Rey Mysterio thanks to a truly heartless backstab from Goldust.

***

Ziggler retreats in victory, and once he does Goldust gets back in the ring. Rey is still defenseless, and Goldust doesn't even hestitate to shove the referee out of his way before laying a beating on the poor luchador. First after fist meets Rey's skull before The Bizarre One finally hits the Final Cut. However, even then Goldust seems unsatisfied as he drags Rey to the corner... and props his legs up on the bottom ropes. The illegal low blow kick Shattered Dreams finds it mark, and Rey clutches his groin in agony before going completely limp, passing out from the pain. Goldust smirks a little toward the hard camera, and takes a deep, theatrical bow as Raw goes off the air.

***

Overall rating: B

Senerio
Oct 19, 2009

I call the darkness unto me from deepest depths of Earth and sea. From ancient evils unawoken, break the one that can't be broken. To blackest night, I pledge my soul and crush my heart to burning coal. To summon forth a deathly power, to see my hated foe devoured.


This is a very barebones Smackdown because Smackdown needs writers badly. I'm only in as a temp til Smackdown can get actual writers.



AndyOrgan@gmail.com posted:

Daniel Bryan comes out injured, and offers another open challenge. Graves's music plays, but is cut off as Teddy Long tells Bryan he can't have a match tonight; he's injured, and if he won't care about his own health, Teddy will do it for him. However, since Graves is such a go-getter, he has a match with Ezekiel Jackson right now!

Graves vs Big Zeke, Graves wins with the Lucky 13.

Graves brags about taking out the trash at Night of Champions, and how Dean Ambrose can't hope to stand up to him.

AJ Lee and Kaitlyn are talking, when Natalya and Beth come in and taunt them, and they say that the two teams have a match later tonight

Sin Cara vs Jinder Mahal, with Barrett on commentary. Sin Cara wins with a Dragon Bomb

Barrett promo, announcing a match between the two next week, and if Sin Cara loses, he can't challenge for the title again as long as Barrett is champ

Dean defeats Brodus Clay with a Midnight Special

Graves and Langston attempt to toss Dean into the dumpster, but Dean avoids them and they're sent into the dumpster instead

Sheamus promo, Cody interrupts, Orton interrupts, Kane attacks Orton from behind, Teddy Long makes a Tag Team Match

Orton/Sheamus vs Cody/Kane, Sheamus pins Cody after a Brogue kick

Natalya and Beth beat AJ and Kaitlyn, Beth pins Kaitlyn after a Glam Slam

Divas of Doom beat down AJ, Alicia makes the save

Christian brags about defeating Sheamus again, says he can beat anyone on the roster. Teddy makes a match between Christian and Cena

Henry attacks Cena before the match with Christian, leaving him laying. Cena insists he can still work the match

Christian beats Cena, taking advantage of Henry's attack. The match ended when Cena had Christian up for the FU, but Henry's attack prevented him from hitting it, and Christian escaped and took advantage of it to hit the Killswitch.

Cena calls out Henry, challenging him to another match at Vengeance in a STEEL CAGE

There's a bad idea in here somewhere, but nobody stopped me in time so...

Senerio fucked around with this message at Jul 11, 2017 around 14:08

Happyman
Jul 20, 2011

Say, do you take your mask off when you go to the bathroom?



RAW - October Week 1, 2011
Kansas City, Missouri

- Double contract signing of Triple H vs. Del Rio and Zack Ryder vs. Seth Rollins. Vince and Johnny Ace preside.
- Dolph Ziggler def. Alex Riley (pinfall, 9:58)
- Drew and Swags cut a promo on Air Boom, tell them they're going to crush their dream in TTTurmoil. Air Boom tell them they already beat the champs, and on Sunday they'll beat them too!
- Drew McIntyre & Jack Swagger def. Air Boom after Otunga & McGillicutty interfered (pinfall, 11:32)
- Triple H comes out with a small army of security and his sledgehammer and tells the heels to back off before they can beat down Air Boom. He also tells the champs that Tag Team Turmoil's entrance order will be decided by random drawing. Air Boom takes out both heel teams from behind with tandem double dropkicks for good measure.
- Kassius Ohno hype video: Debuting MONDAY!
- Richie Steamboat def. Renee Dupree (pinfall, 11:13)
- Ricky Steamboat hypes up Richie backstage for the final match in the best of seven on Sunday. Renee Dupree attacks them and injures Ricky.
- CM Punk "hacks" the video feed to call Vince out for a meeting at Hell in a Cell.
- Derrick Bateman def. Clint Baccarat (pinfall, 1:01)
- Derrick Bateman takes the jobber hostage, demanding for Hurricane to face him at the PPV.
- The Miz, Seth Rollins & R-Truth def. Zack Ryder, John Morrison & Justin Gabriel after Maryse interfered (pinfall, Miz over Gabriel, 16:15)
- Goldust cut a promo on Rey Mysterio.
- Alberto Del Rio & Goldust def. Rey Mysterio & The Big Show (pinfall, Del Rio over Show, 20:30)
- The heels celebrate in the ring. HHH stares ADR down from the commentary desk.

B

Senerio
Oct 19, 2009

I call the darkness unto me from deepest depths of Earth and sea. From ancient evils unawoken, break the one that can't be broken. To blackest night, I pledge my soul and crush my heart to burning coal. To summon forth a deathly power, to see my hated foe devoured.




SmackDown, October Week 1
St. Louis, MS

House of Pain is out. Henry flatly refuses Cena's challenge, saying he's been there, and beaten Cena. His goal now is to get the WHC. Cena comes out, and tries to goad Henry into accepting his challenge, but Henry says he's toppled Cena. Christian comes out and refuses Henry's request for a match. Teddy books a match between Henry and Cena for tonight, winner gets a match with Christian at Vengeance.

Cody brags about injuring Bryan, and Ezekiel Jackson comes out to challenge him to a match. Cody accepts.

Cody vs Big Zeke, Cody wins.

Dean Ambrose cuts a promo about anything and everything.

Divas of Doom def Kelly Kelly and Eve, with Natalya tapping Kelly Kelly out.

AJ asks Alicia why she saved her, and Alicia tells her how she can't stand bullies like those two. AJ thanks her, and tells her she has her back

Wade defeats Sin Cara with the Wasteland

As Trent Barretta and Yoshi Tatsu are entering for a tag team match, Kane attacks them, and leaves them laying

Sheamus defeats Slater via Brogue Kick.

Orton cuts a promo on Kane, but is interrupted by Tyson Kidd. Orton hits Kidd with an RKO to end the segment.

Cena is in the locker room, preparing for his match with Henry, when he hears someone in the background. "Hello, John. Xavier Woods. I have another message from The Rock: Do you like pie?" Cena turns around, and rolls his eyes when he sees Xavier. Cena shrugs, and says that he's not overly fond of pie. Xavier gets mad, and yells into his headset that he can't say that anymore! This isn't the attitude era! After a couple seconds, he sighs and asks Cena if he prefers strudel. Cena looks like he wants to take that headset out of Xavier's hands, but before he can try, Xavier apologizes for cutting the time off short, but he has a match right now, and has to run

Xavier Woods def. Jinder Mahal via Lost in the Woods

Edge comes out, saying he wasn't terribly fond of how Christian has been acting, and announces that he'll be on commentary for Christian's matches from now on, and if Christian isn't on his best behavior, he'll regret it

Cena vs Henry, Edge and Christian are bickering on commentary. Match ends in a double countout when Christian prevents them from getting into the ring.

Teddy Long comes out, and announces that Christian will be defending his title in a steel cage match at Vengeance, against Mark Henry AND John Cena

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Happyman
Jul 20, 2011

Say, do you take your mask off when you go to the bathroom?

edit: it was already posted, my bad!

Happyman fucked around with this message at Aug 9, 2017 around 19:18

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