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Putty
Mar 21, 2013




Mangos are like the Russian Roulette of the fruit world. One of them could be sweet and good to eat, but most of them are like biting into something made of dental floss and baby tears. The good ones, rare as they come, cause you to crave more, but the vast amount of lovely flavorless fibery mangoes makes it not worth it.

The softness does not tell. The color is a compulsive liar. The smell is of many selective hands before it judging based on the former. How do you pick the good mangoes????

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ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015



I like getting the green ones and chewing on the sour pit sometimes.

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008
Probation
Can't post for 4 hours!


Are you going to a Mexican grocery store? If not then good luck.

Xaris
Jul 25, 2006


Jacking In
Jacking Out


Ride The Gravitron posted:

Are you going to a Mexican grocery store? If not then good luck.
seriously, go to a good produce market or something. whatever your garbage is at safeway/albertsons/whatever is going to be really bad no matter what you do


But yes, gently squeeze one it should be like a peach/avocado. also you can smell a mango at the stem and ripe ones will be sweet and overripe ones will be sour.

you can also ripen them quickly by putting them in a bag with fruits like apples or pears overnight

Sjs00
Jun 29, 2013
Probation
Can't post for 4 hours!


Whenever I buy mangoes its by the case from the Chinese fruit sellers at a flea market. They're bright orange and loving delicious. You cut the vertical to the pit and cube the two pieces and turn them inside out; then you eat the core.
..
Also its loving winter time all the mangoes everywhere are not ripe.

Putty
Mar 21, 2013


Ride The Gravitron posted:

Are you going to a Mexican grocery store? If not then good luck.

Stop and Shop mostly, which is probably self explanatory.

Yeah now I gotta find my local flea market.

Fitzy Fitz
May 14, 2005

Dynomite

I have a mango slicer but I never actually buy or eat mangos.

Uncle at Nintendo
Dec 31, 2000

MIYAMOTO-SAN... YOU HAVE MY AXE


Very carefully

ProfessorMurder
Aug 27, 2003

I can wet the bed in the shape of Abraham Lincoln

Mangoes, avocados, dates, I love them all. It's not so hard to find the good ones.

Putty
Mar 21, 2013


I hope to find a poor mexican man covered in snow in the middle of New York selling his supply of home grown mangoes. I will buy his entire stock and him too.

T.S. Smelliot
Apr 23, 2010

Paid for by the Silent Majority


Putty posted:



Mangos are like the Russian Roulette of the fruit world. One of them could be sweet and good to eat, but most of them are like biting into something made of dental floss and baby tears. The good ones, rare as they come, cause you to crave more, but the vast amount of lovely flavorless fibery mangoes makes it not worth it.

The softness does not tell. The color is a compulsive liar. The smell is of many selective hands before it judging based on the former. How do you pick the good mangoes????

you live in Florida idiot

T.S. Smelliot
Apr 23, 2010

Paid for by the Silent Majority


*walks to front yard, picks ripe mango, eats*

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

The door blew shut but here's the deal
Dreams are lies, it's the dreaming that's real


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tim3rYmRrdo

Dreddout
Oct 1, 2015

You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.


Sjs00 posted:

Also its loving winter time all the mangoes everywhere are not ripe.

drowned in pussy juice
Oct 13, 2009

by FactsAreUseless


I buy my mangos off a cart on a side road in buttfuck nowhere because I'm smart

drowned in pussy juice
Oct 13, 2009

by FactsAreUseless


Sorry about your lovely mangoes America *puffs out chest* you can come here and have as many good mangos as u want

BeefThief
Aug 8, 2007

see you in the 'universe

Fun Shoe

smell it ya dingus

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

The door blew shut but here's the deal
Dreams are lies, it's the dreaming that's real


BeefThief posted:

smell it ya dingus

jon joe
Oct 19, 2011


Have you considered Mangosteen, instead?

a new study bible!
Feb 1, 2009



Philadelphia: Where Super Bowl dreams go to Di

MANGOES ARE GROSS AND TASTE LIKE SOAP

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008
Probation
Can't post for 4 hours!


You taste like soap!

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

The door blew shut but here's the deal
Dreams are lies, it's the dreaming that's real


your soap tastes like mangoes!

a new study bible!
Feb 1, 2009



Philadelphia: Where Super Bowl dreams go to Di

im p sure i taste like salty dirt

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

The door blew shut but here's the deal
Dreams are lies, it's the dreaming that's real


i'm thinking of the plot of a hit new action-thriller called 'The Soaperative' about a top-secret CIA operative with obsessive compulsive disorder

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

by zen death robot


It should be mostly firm with just a slight softness. This way it holds up well when you shove it up your rear end.

Putty
Mar 21, 2013


I wish mangos were like orange juice, which is in all-seasons cause they store it in super vats with preserving stuff mixed in it. That's why different OJ brands tastes different.


jon joe posted:

Have you considered Mangosteen, instead?

I've had protein smoothies with mangosteen in them it's pretty good!

VendaGoat posted:

It should be mostly firm with just a slight softness. This way it holds up well when you shove it up your rear end.

Someone finally gets it.

KomodoWagon
May 10, 2013


I just buy mine a day or two in advance and let them ripen in my kitchen.

Hardawn
Mar 15, 2004



College Slice

The marriage of the sun and the moon book has an interesting section on mangos and how following the mango season south is a huge thing and the interesting effects that eating mangos has. Like an orgasmic reaction or something from eating mangos at specific time in their ripening process.

So good luck

Mystery Steve
Nov 9, 2006


Fun Shoe

Hulk Hogan knows.

a new study bible!
Feb 1, 2009



Philadelphia: Where Super Bowl dreams go to Di

Mystery Steve posted:

Hulk Hogan knows.

just whips out one of his balls and compares the color

The Walrus
Jul 9, 2002



just buy organic mangos

ProfessorMurder
Aug 27, 2003

I can wet the bed in the shape of Abraham Lincoln

Mangosteen is dumb as hell

a new study bible!
Feb 1, 2009



Philadelphia: Where Super Bowl dreams go to Di

Mangosteen, also tastes like soap

a new study bible!
Feb 1, 2009



Philadelphia: Where Super Bowl dreams go to Di

gently caress mangos and all mango like fruits

My Man Shran
Apr 28, 2011

Pinkskin Power


Mangosteen, a funny

I am mangostein

Sheep-Goats
Jul 28, 2003



The skinny yellow variety is nicer than the rotund blushy ones

Nefarious 2.0
Apr 22, 2008

Offense is overrated anyway.


gently caress them

Nefarious 2.0
Apr 22, 2008

Offense is overrated anyway.


remember when that goon hosed a plantain and made a thread about it

Hopper
Dec 28, 2004

BOOING! BOOING!

Grimey Drawer

Pro tip: unripe mangoes ripen best when losely wrapped into newspaper and kept in a kitchen cabinet for 2-3 days.

Also, here in Europe, the smaller yellow mangoes Indian/Pakistani stores sell are much better than the green and red supermarket ones.

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Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

The door blew shut but here's the deal
Dreams are lies, it's the dreaming that's real


Lowtax should have come out as anti-mangosteen, then goons would have loved them.

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