COOKIE MEAT

The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > COOKIE MEAT

«‹›2 »

Composting Toilet

HAHAHAHAAH...TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT...

DICK

# ? Jan 12, 2017 13:34

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 23, 2024 08:39

Darkman Fanpage

cookies are a sometimes food, so im told

# ? Jan 12, 2017 14:00

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

Dick,

It's been ages since we spoke and I'm not sure if this letter will even reach you. It's beautiful here, so much wide open space, prairies that seem to roll on forever, vast herds of chocolate chip cookies roaming free. We could become rich off the abundance of cookie meat here.

# ? Jan 12, 2017 14:43

death sext

Composting Toilet posted:

HAHAHAHAAH...TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT...

DICK

I'll take it! thank you for this opportunity to become your business partner in this one-in-a-lifetime venture.

idea: we travel the country selling cookie meat as a cure for bursitis and female complaints

# ? Jan 12, 2017 15:49

Ride The Gravitron: by FactsAreUseless

Is this cookie free range?

# ? Jan 12, 2017 16:01

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

Still remember the first time I went to the cookie ranch.

The stench of cookie manure was overbearing.

# ? Jan 12, 2017 16:06

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

FYI those little bags of "bite sized" cookies are the veal of the cookie world

# ? Jan 12, 2017 16:12

Ride The Gravitron: by FactsAreUseless

People for ethic treatment of cookies

# ? Jan 12, 2017 16:22

death sext

what's the cookie equivalent of foie gra? snickerdoodles?

# ? Jan 12, 2017 16:22

Ride The Gravitron: by FactsAreUseless

I used to have a pet cookie and saw how much love they can give, I've never been able to munch on them since.

# ? Jan 12, 2017 16:52

Manifisto

Luvcow posted:

Dick,

It's been ages since we spoke and I'm not sure if this letter will even reach you. It's beautiful here, so much wide open space, prairies that seem to roll on forever, vast herds of chocolate chip cookies roaming free. We could become rich off the abundance of cookie meat here.

death sext posted:

I'll take it! thank you for this opportunity to become your business partner in this one-in-a-lifetime venture.

idea: we travel the country selling cookie meat as a cure for bursitis and female complaints

# ? Jan 12, 2017 17:20

Manifisto

death sext posted:

what's the cookie equivalent of foie gra? snickerdoodles?

hershey's kisses. those used to be chocolate chips, grown to obscene size as the cookies were force-fed cocoa powder, butter, and vanilla.

:smith:

# ? Jan 12, 2017 17:22

Ride The Gravitron: by FactsAreUseless

I think they're about to hatch :neckbeard:

# ? Jan 12, 2017 17:30

death sext

us: is your unruly womb wandering around all the time? are your joints afflicted so terribly?

awe-struck masses: yes! yes!

us: introducing cookie meat! it's the cookie with the filling of livestock*. rub on body, put in mouth, put it under your pillow at night, it's all good.

masses, again: we love you. key to the city!

*also contains cocaine and opium

# ? Jan 12, 2017 18:09

Ride The Gravitron: by FactsAreUseless

*runs into grocery store. Tears open every packet of cookies*

GO! RUN! YOU'RE FREE!

# ? Jan 12, 2017 18:52

death sext

*breaks open every Oreo*

"which ones got the meats inside?!(!(!!"

# ? Jan 12, 2017 18:58

death sext

PETC

# ? Jan 12, 2017 18:59

google THIS

PETC has eaten more than 34,000 cookies since 1998

PETC members: (frantically chewing and trying to shake the crumbs from their fat rolls) Mo we habem't!

# ? Jan 12, 2017 19:12

Manifisto

what really breaks my heart is when people raise cookies just for the hides, and the meat goes to waste

I don't care how fashionable that nutterbutter trim on your evening gown might look, that cookie's sacrifice deserves respect

# ? Jan 12, 2017 19:19

Ride The Gravitron: by FactsAreUseless

Cookie hunting for sport is unethical

# ? Jan 12, 2017 19:33

Manifisto

soylent grahams, anyone?

# ? Jan 12, 2017 19:52

google THIS

Always adopt your cookie from a shelter, and never buy Cookie Crisp cereal in a store. Most of those poor little cookies come from General Mills.

# ? Jan 12, 2017 20:22

Manifisto

I travel in my time machine to a dystopian future where cookies frolick unconcerned in a sunny paradise aboveground, while the keebler elves dwell in the depths, coming to the surface only to hunt and devour the hapless confections

# ? Jan 12, 2017 21:34

FluffieDuckie

google THIS posted:

Always adopt your cookie from a shelter, and never buy Cookie Crisp cereal in a store. Most of those poor little cookies come from General Mills.

Thank you for the beautiful sig Machai!

# ? Jan 12, 2017 21:51

vanisher

google THIS posted:

Always adopt your cookie from a shelter, and never buy Cookie Crisp cereal in a store. Most of those poor little cookies come from General Mills.

# ? Jan 12, 2017 21:55

Ride The Gravitron: by FactsAreUseless

Oh give me a home where the cookie dough roam,
Where the 'chips meet strawberry short cake
Where seldom is heard a nutrious word,
And the skies have milk clouds all day.

# ? Jan 12, 2017 21:59

Manifisto

it's dessert time at the hippie commune. out come sausages, cold cuts, beef jerky, slim jims. the newcomer timidly raises his hand and asks, "could I have a cookie instead?" the room grows silent; everyone turns to stare at him, aghast.

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Jan 12, 2017 22:56

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

holy poo poo lol at this whole thread

# ? Jan 12, 2017 22:59

death sext

COOKIE MEAT COOKIE MEET

Judging cookie meat breeds, cookie meat dancing, and cookie meat flavor.

# ? Jan 12, 2017 23:08

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

"they were slaughtering the thin mints?"

"and they were screaming"

"and you ran away?"

"no, first i tried to free them. i... i opened the gate to their pen, but they wouldn't run- they just stood there confused, they wouldn't run"

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? Jan 12, 2017 23:13

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

Nosfereefer posted:

"they were slaughtering the thin mints?"

"and they were screaming"

"and you ran away?"

"no, first i tried to free them. i... i opened the gate to their pen, but they wouldn't run- they just stood there confused, they wouldn't run"

# ? Jan 12, 2017 23:14

Manifisto

Nosfereefer posted:

"they were slaughtering the thin mints?"

"and they were screaming"

"and you ran away?"

"no, first i tried to free them. i... i opened the gate to their pen, but they wouldn't run- they just stood there confused, they wouldn't run"

haha

"I ate his mallomars with jelly beans and a nice 2%" *thpthpthpthpthpthpthpt*

# ? Jan 12, 2017 23:28

google THIS

Soylent Brown is made of people! It's made of gingerbread people!

# ? Jan 12, 2017 23:28

google THIS

Manifisto posted:

"I ate his mallomars with jelly beans and a nice 2%" *thpthpthpthpthpthpthpt*

# ? Jan 12, 2017 23:28

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

Manifisto posted:

haha

"I ate his mallomars with jelly beans and a nice 2%" *thpthpthpthpthpthpthpt*

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? Jan 12, 2017 23:32

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

industrialized cookie farming is monstrous. they'll put as many oreos as physically possible in those tiny coops where they can't move. the stress of it all causes them to peck at each others fillings, or worse. maybe think about that next time you consider buying that "extra large" 20% off pack of oreos to gorge yourself on. is all that suffering really worth it for access to marginally cheaper cookies?

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? Jan 12, 2017 23:36

Ride The Gravitron: by FactsAreUseless

You don't even want to know the growth hormones they use to breed the double stuffed Oreos. Let's just say you don't find double stuffed in the wild for a reason. Just thinking about it makes me sick.

# ? Jan 12, 2017 23:40

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

the baker: ah, fresh dough!

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? Jan 12, 2017 23:41

google THIS

Rocky Balboa absolutely wailing on a giant cookie cake

# ? Jan 12, 2017 23:56

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 23, 2024 08:39

Dads Dip Cup

that evening, the knight-captain was visited in his chambers by a lady-in-waiting. but he was in no mood for company, the weight of his guilt bore heavily upon him.

"you look unwell, my lord. is the campaign not progressing as planned?"

though he knew it unwise, he confided in her. "I simply do not understand what it is His Majesty seeks.", he spoke sullenly. "the elves were a peaceful people, they gave us no quarrel." visions of the battlefield raced through his mind... the forests rife with flame, the screams of the dying. "...and we slaughtered them like cattle. and to what end?" the captain, walking over to a leather sack at his bedside, procured a portion of the spoils of the kingdom's most recent conquest... a single E. L. Fudge cookie.

"is a cookie truly worth its weight in the blood of the innocent?"

# ? Jan 13, 2017 01:01

The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > COOKIE MEAT

«‹›2 »