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 Update 1: Here Tomorrow, Gond Today Bored. Hmm.  Hmmmm.  1-Civilization 2 - Menu  Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm  mmNah.  Yes.  Yes. And no, no it wasn't. Not a bit.  This was a very hard decision to make until I realized that Let's Gond should probably contain Gond rather than, uh, Aalu. That wouldn't make much sense.  I make no apologies tell no lies and offer no excuses. I do offer an explanation, though. Better yet, two of them! 1: this is Let's Gond not Let's Pro there's a man who did that a little while ago. We're here to Gond, not to Pro. 2: I am literally a baby and you shouldn't be mean to babies.  We make the first of many departures from historical canon: Stompy was a woman. I don't lie though. I won't tell this video game I'm a woman when I'm not. That would be impolite.  Well. It's not a BAD name.  But we can do better. Nothing like the classics. 2-Civilization 2 - Primeval World/Jurasic Jungle (SIC)  And with that, we begin. Here it is. Here is Gond. Glory to Gond. I guess. Gond measures four hundred cubits by eighty cubits by nine hundred cubits and as soon as we discover what a cubit is we will be very impressed. It also has a population of 1, which we can at least understand. We can understand that because it's printed on that little flag next to Gond. Very helpful. Let's take a closer look at it.  Now, this might appear somewhat confusing. Don't worry though, we can talk our way through this.
The map shows what tiles we are working and for what yields per turn. Gond can always work its own city tile, plus one additional tile for each person. Yields include food (or wheat) trade (or orange recycling symbols) and production (or shields, or poo poo that makes no sense). Currently producing, city improvements, units supported, and units present are all pretty much what they sound like.  I command the creation of an additional Coelophysis instead, for scouting purposes. I hope this is the right thing to do. Most units in Civilization 2 are statblocks without exceptional qualities, and exceptions will be noted otherwise. Coelophysis here is worth noting: it is a TERRIBLE statblock without exceptional qualities.  While I'm at it, this unit catches my eye. It's sitting in Gond and it's not really doing much. I command its movement, and I also hope this is the right thing to do.  Wow, that Coelophysis built itself fast. Uh. Um. Build an Arena. Something not garbage.  Our scouts have barely left the city borders before they puncture sweet, sweet goodie hut to our southeast, earning a random reward. In this case, our reward is friends.  Much bigger friends. This is a Baryonyx, and it must have been very lonely all by itself. Gond gives it purpose and camaraderie and the command to get scouting right now mister. This guy can move twice as much per turn as our short-legged little Coelophysis can.  It is 498 million years before the internet and already someone is writing up best-of-lists and throwing shade at people. This is familiar and calming. Also, we are indeed very Fine.  The world so far. It's very small, very green, and very damp. It could easily be confused with a frog. You must try not to do this. Our Thecodontosaurus there is hard at work. It can build things. It can be useful. It can build things for Gond. Like a road.  Ah, and here's one of the bigger contributors to our mapping, at 3 moves a turn. This is a fish. This fish is not for eating, this fish is our friend. It is for Gond and it is our friend. Its name is Gyroptychius. Please do not call it Gyro. We want to remember NOT to eat it. Especially since it's found us such a nice spot. This little inlet is laden with Spice tiles, for lots of food. I think we will build our road this way. For later.  Not all huts are equal. Some are so lonely that nobody's home.  Maybe it's because we're already well on the way with the road to our next city, but I only just now realize that I should probably have someone to build it. Thecodontosaurus maintenance is very expensive, but the one I already have now is homeless and pays maintenance to no city. Therefore, rather than using it to build a city, I shall keep it building roads until it is old and obsolete. This is job security. I'll just make a new one here, then build a city with it instead.  More huts. I don't know who's building these since last I checked there are four hundred and something million years between us and the invention of the opposable thumb, but that's not going to be the strangest building we'll see in this game so let's not worry about it. This one is full of gold, which we apparently like. I'll accept this. Birds are dinosaurs. Birds like shiny things. Dinosaurs liked shiny things. This is logic.  Oh my. Now there's a turnup for the books.  It's not every day you learn something new. Evolutionary Advances are extremely important. They're the key to new units, new buildings, Wonders of the World, and sometimes just plain bewilderment. For instance, we are now capable of researching 'Teeth.' This would be very helpful indeed, because as it is I've no idea how any of our units are feeding themselves.  Therefore, I ignore the stupid and misinformed advice of my smartypants science advisor and decide to figure out these 'Teeth' things. Shut up, you don't even know how to chew yet, I won't listen to you.  Our Baryonyx forges onwards into the wild unknown, finding more and more shiny rocks...  ...and disappointments. Can't win them all.  Just most of them.  Seriously, he's covering some good ground. And finding new spots for cities - all those grass tiles with shields gain +1 bonus production.  Speaking of cities...  Right. We're going to get this bad boy down the road and to his new, spice-laden home as quickly as we can; as long as he's alive he puts a crippling -1 production AND food to Gond, slowing its growth rate from 'feeble' right down to 'no.'  And the good news keeps rolling: our Baryonyx has found another friend in a hut! This Iguanodon isn't as fast as him, and it isn't as tough as him, and it's only exactly as strong as him, but... ...hmm. Well, it's still better than nothing.  Our fish, by contrast, has found no friends. Lots of land though. That'd be a nice spot for a city, with all those krill and ammonites in reach. Of course, that's a long ways away yet. Before we Gond abroad, we must Gond near home.  Like so.  Bam.  (CLICK HERE to hear the stirring patriotic thuds of Gondwanan labour at work)  Parcae is more productive than Gond, has more food than Gond, and commands greater trade than Gond. I'm beginning to suspect I might have chosen the wrong title for this LP. Nevertheless, let's build an Arena here, so we may produce Veteran units. Just in case.  Through careful analysis, observation, and the deaths of dozens of volunteers, we have finally discovered what those funny little bumps inside our mouths are!  I have only the best feelings about this decision.  Wait. That's not my fish. That is someone else's fish! How unexpected; we've met someone new! A new friend! NEXT TIME: DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, BLOODSHED. New Buildings New Units Drakyn fucked around with this message at 00:30 on Feb 16, 2017 |
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Jan 14, 2017 20:15
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biosterous posted:I would like to know more about Gond Dean of Swing posted:Gond not dead.
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Jan 14, 2017 22:10
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Update 2: Gond Fishing  The official instrument of Gond is the bellowing very loudly. It is also the national bird.Hello again and welcome back. Last time we found a fish and it was not our fish and it also wasn't food! Let's see what the hell that means. 3-Civilization 2 - Tenochitlan Revealed  Also we recruited another Baryonyx. I guess having big fat fish-grapplin' arms and nobody to hug makes you very lonely and easily manipulated.  Oh yes, please!  what. whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat  whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaathat's better. Now, what's cookin', Varakara?  Man we literally just met you and you're already trying to be our pal. This isn't how you earn people's trust, you know? You've got to  welcome aboard great to meetcha want to see Gond it measures four hundred cubits by eighty cubits by nine hundred cubits and as soon as we discover what a cubit is you will be very impressed.  Okay, the strong, silent, isolationist type. I can deal with that.  I could deal with THAT even better though.  Alright, I've only just begun this eternal friendship and I'm starting to regret it.  Wait, excuse me? You were just willing to PAY ME to have a conversation and now you're hanging up on me!  rear end in a top hat. We're going to explore this desert and find better friends.  See even the dinosaur internet knows you're HOPELESS. You hear me, Varakara? HOPELESS. And we're not. Because we're GREAT.  Oh what the hell is this. What fuckin' fresh hell is this.  And what is THIS. I go to all the trouble of stealing this goodie hut right off your front lawn and you've let it get full of barbarians! Barbarians, Varakara! What the hell are you even DOING with your life?  (CLICK HERE to be roused by the stirring battle cries of Gondwana)  Victory, but at the cost of severe injury. Those thumb spikes really hurt.  Why is it that the only friends I can make are homeless?  Oh you know what?  gently caress YOU  AND gently caress YOU TOO I DON'T NEED YOU  I DON'T NEED YOU EITHER  YOU'RE SLOW AND COSTING ME UNNECESSARY AMOUNTS OF UPKEEP, GOND CAN BARELY FUCKIN' TIE ITS SHOELACES AND YOU'RE SMOTHERING IT IN INEPTITUDE  I DON’T NEED HUTS EITHER  ALL I NEED IS DEAD FISH AND THE LYMPH OF MY ENEMIES  (CLICK HERE to relish the anguished death throes of the enemy at sea)  Wear it in pride, Barry. Wear it in pride. That's some good fishing right there.  Though satisfying, our murder spree has depopulated Thrut - with each failed defense, a city loses one population. One more assault and we could murder literally everyone, leaving us no city to take. And now we play the most dangerous game. The waiting game.  This hut contained DNA. Complicated, but rendered plausible by Michael Crichton.  It's not easy being amphibious, but we love them anyways. Mostly because we have no choice: these are the only units in the game that can hop straight off a  Oopsie. Looks like our Coelophysis maintenance problems are taking care of themselves.  (CLICK HERE to nod in approval of the architectural skills of Parcae continues to excel. Why can't you be more like Parcae, Gond, and less like Gond?  But wait, there's more! We have now discovered.... how to eat raw flesh. Huh. Funny trick. Wonder what we were doing before.  More importantly, it's led us to all sorts of knowledge and murdertools! That's a vital piece of maritime infrastructure, a Wonder of the World, and three military units all unlocked from one evolutionary advance. Not too shabby.  Man Dam Building almost sounds like a plausible thing to discover, let's get on that. I'm not sure if I can take us unravelling the mysteries of 'digestive system' or something like that.  And now we're going to build an Oviraptor, which, thanks to Parcae's Arena, will come out as a veteran with bonus combat stats. This is fine. This is good. Nothing bad will happen.  I promise you Varakara I will not lose this waiting game. I am very patient. You'd better not blink.   Earthworks, another Wonder. And we've opened the way to even bigger and more complicated techniques. Like picking up after our poop.  Let's not learn how to do that just yet.  This happens now and then. We're playing over milions of years here; sometimes the world slips and shudders and an ocean is now a bit of land, or a mountain pops up out of a plain, or something like that. Don't blame me, blame tectonics. And lots of time. Lots of time. Lots of long, boring, endless, grinding, eroding, sighing, ti  i am very bad at the waiting game  Ah-HAH! Civilization 2 - Funeral March Wait what  I have just committed murder on a scale incalculable. A thriving, warlike, hostile society has been eradicated from the face of this planet, passed from the ever-moving NOW into the paralysis of the past, into the dust and the dirt and the dinosaurs’ graveyard*, bone-choked and mineral-coated, lost and gone forever. Man, they had a REALLY nice place. I bet I could fit a city in here. We'll just save this for now and  Well. I guess we'd better work on changing our government. NEXT TIME: LEBENSRAUM, REDECORATION, IKEA. *I asked Al Purdy yesterday if I could use this and he said Sure Go Ahead. New Buildings New Units Drakyn fucked around with this message at 00:31 on Feb 16, 2017 |
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Jan 15, 2017 21:35
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Samovar posted:Looks like the Thruthvang were Gond with the Wind? To save on page space, today's update was drowned in a flash flood, scavenged, abraded by wind and sand, buried, compressed, shoved through several tectonic shifts, exposed, and eroded. At the end of the whole process you could fit what was left inside a breadbox and also this link: Update 3: Gond West, Young Maniraptoran Drakyn fucked around with this message at 23:54 on Jan 26, 2017 |
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Jan 18, 2017 00:26
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Alexeythegreat posted:Go(o)nds will be go(o)nds Seyser Koze posted:I'm amazed (and frightened) that you're still second place in might after all the free gonds you've picked up. Update 3 posted:
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Jan 18, 2017 06:31
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Glazius posted:There's just something almost inherently funny about Dinosaur Civ. This is actually just a plaster cast of the real update, which is stuffed in a big box at the Smithsonian hidden behind six filing cabinets filled with 19th-century beetles and a decaying plywood partition: Update 4: Gond Home Drakyn fucked around with this message at 23:53 on Jan 26, 2017 |
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Jan 20, 2017 00:25
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Glazius posted:I love the military technology tree. When you're trying to genericize common dino features it's going to get painfully, painfully generic. Seyser Koze posted:I'm assuming the council doesn't involve clips from Jurassic Park howling at each other? 
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Jan 21, 2017 05:31
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CommissarMega posted:I can't remember- is there a way to transfer upkeep costs from one city to another? Gond can't be Gond unless it's more Gond than any other! Wastrel_ posted:Do the jungle tiles give more resources in this one? Remember being turned off by it way back when because I just saw lots and lots of what I assumed to be worthless jungle on the map. Very nice units, though. Basically, it breaks down to +1 shields from all tiles except for the following: Grazing (Buffalo): No change. Swamps and Jungles: +3 shields, making them 1Food/3Shields/0Trade From this we draw two conclusions: (1) the Mesozoic was extremely busy; and (2) apparently a healthy level of moisturization is the key to industry.
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Jan 21, 2017 16:31
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Cathode Raymond posted:What does the science/tech victory consist of in this mod?  There isn't one. A fair sum of Civ 2's less...typical scenarios didn't enable the game's science victory option. This is probably because the game's science victory involves building a custom-designed spaceship (rendered in ~glorious multimedia~) and then using it to race all the way to alpha centauri, and adapting that into a build-a-bird/digging underground 'lost world'-style survival caverns ala Dinotopia would've been too much effort. Easier to just redo sprites and let you wrassle with 'em than try to remodel a giant collection of low-rez spheres and plates with a rocket on it.Hello Sailor posted:If I remember right, that's been in since Civ 1. update 1 posted:I am literally a baby  Wastrel_ posted:That is an astounding bonus. 1 food without the possibility of improvement through irrigation (which clears the tile of swamp/jungle and turns it into grassland) means a city with many jungle tiles can hardly grow unless you clear some, though. Guess it's a balance thing. Of all my misspent wastrel days of Civ 2, the majority were misspent here. I'm no expert even at this but my no expertise magnifies grossly once out of that comfort zone. Someone else must take up all the other torches. Gond knows it took enough effort for my lazy rear end to get this thing off the ground; if I tried to do all of them we'd be here until the next asteroid hits. Besides that, this is clearly labelled and advertised as a Let's Gond. I looked through all the other files and I didn't see a single Gond in any of 'em.
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Jan 21, 2017 19:04
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Fun and somewhat related fact: Brachiosaurus doesn't exist anymore! Well, that's a lie. The genus Brachiosaurus is still a thing, but Brachiosaurus brancai, the most-illustrated and most-loved and most-beautiful species of Brachiosaurus, was deemed Too Special and put into its own genus: Giraffatitan. This update does exist though. I promise that very truly. And I would never alter its name without first informing YOU, the viewer. Update 5: Gond But Not Forgotten Drakyn fucked around with this message at 23:53 on Jan 26, 2017 |
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Jan 22, 2017 00:26
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NewMars posted:So I figured out what the trading area icon is: It's an Ankylosaurus talking to some kind of raptor I think, with a fallen tree with stuff on it between them, being used as a makeshift market stall. Glazius posted:This is kind of a ridiculous tech bounty. Does the AI just not know how to go after goodies?
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Jan 22, 2017 07:39
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Right, so, what we've been doing is important. VERY important. I cannot overstate this. But nonetheless, we must put it on hold for a bit - just a bit! It's not even a full bite! - to answer some extremely pressing questions before they actually physically squish us. BONUS UPDATE 1: Okay What Does Gond Actually Mean Seriously Like most stories this one absolutely does not begin in the Victorian era but that is where we'll start anyways.   Did you know that cameras used to make your eyes look lazy? It could be true! Once upon there was a man. A man with a beard. A man who loved rocks a lot. A whole damned lot. His name was Henry Benedict Medlicott, believe it or not, and he loved rocks so much he went to India to see some exciting new ones, and there he hosed around considerably until 1872, when he noticed some rocks that didn't quite seem to fit into the older, Cambrian-ish stone of the Vindhyan supergroup. Well, this younger Permian-oid to Triassic-or-so stone needed a name, which Medlicott suggested be 'Gondwana.'   Actually he was completely wrong about how this all worked but let's leave that aside for the moment A dozen or so years after that, some other guy called Edward Suess popped up and noted that this funny little kind of seed fern called Glossopteris was found throughout the Permian stone of Africa, South America, and India. He figured they were all wedged together at some point, and called the hypothetical southern supercontinent 'Gondwanaland,' likely because everyone had already realized that 'Gondwana' was a very satisfying word to say and should be said as often as possible in as many ways as possible.   The picture on the left is the only image here that isn't rubber-stamped fifty times over with giant PUBLIC DOMAIN labels so have a nice citation But all of that doesn't matter that much because the actual, factual origin of the term 'Gond' - and henceforth, Gondwana, and so on, Gondwanaland - is the Gond (or Gondi) people of India. Unlike our own Gonds, you may notice a distinct lack of scales, feathers, a diapsid skull, or the ability to weigh multiple tons. Do not confuse the two. It would be confusing. Drakyn fucked around with this message at 23:54 on Jan 26, 2017 |
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Jan 24, 2017 00:38
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I JUST told you not to confuse them!Drakyn posted:Do not confuse the two. It would be confusing. All is not lost yet. We still have a chance. I, personally, am spending that chance on additional Gond which I shall generously share with you. Update 6: Gond Baby Gond Drakyn fucked around with this message at 23:54 on Jan 26, 2017 |
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Jan 26, 2017 00:04
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Glazius posted:Is the arms race an actual race to develop arms? nweismuller posted:It's an attempt by tyrannosaurs to run on their hands. It always ends poorly. POOL IS CLOSED posted:Gond will overcome.
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Jan 26, 2017 23:44
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TooMuchAbstraction posted:It's nontraditional in that most screenshot LPs just toss everything into the page and gently caress you if you don't like scrolling. But honestly it's fine. The only thing I'd say is that it'd be good if the posts that have updates in them had a banner or something to help call attention to them.
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Jan 26, 2017 23:57
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nweismuller posted:I have a question: what government type in standard Civ2 is Cooperation equivalent to? Are there other dinosaur governments in the crazy land that is Gond? Monarchy, Fundamentalism, the Republic, and Democracy do not exist because they are too unreliable too abstract too complicated and too reliant on mass media. Retrospectively. Dinosaur governments are conceptually limited. But Gond? Gond knows no limits. It dares. Update 7: The Gond Show
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Jan 28, 2017 01:01
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Prism posted:A turn is millions of years. It removes itself. Exactly 1 million years per turn, to be precise. Gond may still be working on Dung Removal but it's apparently had atomic clocks since day 1. Speaking of clocks, stop yours because it's that time again. Update 8: Gondorrhea
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Jan 30, 2017 02:02
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Glazius posted:It's kind of hilarious that the guys who got mauled by barbarians were themselves able enough to maul two entire civs in return SelenicMartian posted:
Speaking of full of stuff, this update is full of poo poo. It has, however, been tastefully relocated for your convenience using the very latest technology. Update 9: Gond To Seed Edit: oh and i guess we increase our wonder count by 300% or whatever Drakyn fucked around with this message at 00:50 on Feb 1, 2017 |
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Feb 1, 2017 00:44
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TooMuchAbstraction posted:"Mammal Suppression Plan" oh my goodness. Glazius posted:Yes, the World Wonder videos are amazing. POOL IS CLOSED posted:But Gond is hygiene! nweismuller posted:The Press Gang icon shows a line of dinosaurs with their legs tied together by a vine. It's sort of like a chain gang for creatures too stupid to have chains. "You now slaves of great Gond empire! Go now and work on big poop pile!" Drakyn fucked around with this message at 05:22 on Feb 1, 2017 |
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Feb 1, 2017 04:53
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Sympathy to our neighbours. Update 10: Gondolences
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Feb 3, 2017 00:09
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Glazius posted:Build a Supermarket? Did they forget to rename those or just the technology description? Also, their Mesozoic equivalents. Whatever those would've been. Let your imaginations guide you. Please, I demand it be so. Edit: Actually I'm an idiot. The Farmer's Market is, in fact, the Mesozoic's supermarket. The tooltip is still typo'd, but we may farm as we please. Corrode posted:
Unfortunately the next update now weighs approximately one million pounds and has crushed itself under its own weight. It will go online regardless as soon as I can find a server robust enough to withstand it. POOL IS CLOSED posted:
Drakyn fucked around with this message at 03:24 on Feb 4, 2017 |
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Feb 4, 2017 02:25
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Tiggum posted:So you can build farmland but you can't get supermarkets, so it's pointless? Drakyn fucked around with this message at 03:41 on Feb 4, 2017 |
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Feb 4, 2017 03:24
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Now I know we're all very busy now. I realize that. I get that. I get you, which is very difficult because I also get Gond at the same time and getting two things at once is very, very tricky. But now it's time for us all to get a third, more urgent thing. BONUS UPDATE 2: Where On Gond's Green Earth Are We? Let us begin with fake things that aren't real.  This is our Gond. There are many like it, and this one is ours. Behold our fake world that isn't real. It measures seventy-five tiles by one hundred and twenty tiles, making it 'Large.' It is also 'Round,' which, in the finest traditions of awkward projection, actually means it's sort of like a cylinder or possibly a donut. Geometry and geography are not to be trifled with.  This is not our Gond and there were none like it and it was never ours. We did see it last bonus update, though. Behold our actual world that was real but is now gone. It measured oh gosh about the same as it does now, but thanks to the magic of plate tectonics everywhere was somewhere else. -North America and most of Asia were Laurasia. -South America, Australia, Africa, India, and Antarctica were Gondwana, or Gondwanaland. This made directions very awkward and difficult. You can see from all this that most of our continents are hugging each other at this time, around the very end of the Triassic. They have so recently combined into Pangaea, only a mere hundred million years ago - the Late Carboniferous. They do not yet know that soon the Jurassic will arrive and they will be slowly torn apart yet again, not to meet once more for millions of years. This cycle of supercontinental aggregation and division has happened repeatedly in Earth's geological history, and is why rocks are always so lonely.  This is our Gond, but it has been fortified with added Education. Behold our fake world that isn't real blemished with the science and knowledge of the actual world that was real but is now gone. With this we can peer past the superficiality of the reality of Gond's greatness into the very essence of what makes Gond Gond. Specifically, we can see it's located in Laurasia. why
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Feb 4, 2017 16:50
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Elite posted:<enlightening discussion of game mechanics> wiegieman posted:Gond drat Turok had some sick music. Kanthulhu posted:Looks like the entire nation of Gond is really bad at geography and thought they were in a different continent Mind you, 'Gond' is a much better name than 'Laur." Style over substance is indeed the substrate much of Gond has been built on. Cathode Raymond posted:I sometimes have dreams in which I encounter a Gondian in the recent future and he shows me his earthworks and his monstrous fish and the spawning ground on which he was hatched. He offers me his maps and I tell him his maps are useless, dung-soiled trash and they are a poor representation of his cylinder world. At that point he bites my head and I awake. Anyways, lorem ipsum dolor delenda Devaloka est Update 11: Gond With The Wind
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Feb 7, 2017 00:28
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Tiggum posted:In case anyone's actually interested, this is a weird thing in Civ2 where you have to have pretty much the highest possible diplomatic rating to get anyone to trade maps with you, which generally means you first have to give them a shitload of stuff that they will inevitably use against you, all for the somewhat dubious advantage of knowing where their cities are. The Let's Pro of Civ 2 that occurred a time or two ago (modded to restore the original, less sociopathic AI) managed to get some mileage out of their own cartographic efforts, mind you. Let's Play Civilization 2: Update 32 posted:Wheee! I’m going to kill these guys the same turn they spawned!
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Feb 7, 2017 07:08
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Glazius posted:So, carnivores are... the equivalent of nuclear weapons? Update 12: Gonda Fly Now war is heck
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Feb 9, 2017 00:14
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TooMuchAbstraction posted:I hope those were literal clams that Plink got. It'd be kind of weird to be using that as slang for currency when we don't have any concept of money. Cathode Raymond posted:This Mammal Suppression Plan sounds awfully final solutionish and I don't think we should embark upon it. Update 13: Bygond Days
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Feb 11, 2017 01:05
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Mzbundifund posted:I'm on board with this new mammal suppression plan.  Glazius posted:I wonder what constitutes "future technology" for Gond? nweismuller posted:Maps. This particular speculation is not possible. And now for something completely impossible Update 14: Gondontology
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Feb 13, 2017 00:35
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Update 15: Gond For Good The real Gond was inside you all along. It is just to the left of your appendix. And it hungers.Well, come back. Last time. Last time. 17-The Lost World: Jurassic Park (PS1) - Base Camp Revenge  Wow, that was weird. Anyways, let's just  oh gently caress YOU.  Well, we've got what we need.  And more than that.   More polishing off.  Well well well. Hello there, stranger.      It must be asked.  Well. We checked.      Nobody listens to us. Ever.  This is quite literally all that Oviphagia does. It is strictly there to turn off the Great Creche. I suppose in case someone else has it and you'd rather they didn't.  From now on, the only purpose to this is point-scoring.  Now if you'll excuse us, we have a civilization to eat.  (CLICK HERE to listen to us dine)    Civilization 2 is complicated. You see, for some reason, when you kill people they tend to come back as alternate nations. It is not clear why. It is not clear how. It is not clear what makes it stop. Besides killing. Lots and lots of killing. But we HAVE grown rather hungry spending two hundred and fifty million years cooped up inside Gond's walls.     He was direct, we'll give him that.   (CLICK HERE for dramatic airborne action)    Oh for god's sake. This is the great and unspeakable power of the 1-tile city. Only amphibious land units may attack coming out of a transport, and aquatic and air units can't occupy a city.   Commissioned from Alulalui and shipped.    And after that little difficulty...well.  It's all over bar the screaming.   wait what       Deja vu.  No, finding them is not easy.  Hush.     Shhh.  No more words. Just quiet time. Victory time.   We have made Gond strong. And now we will make it silent.  A very appropriate title. A good title.  A good time. A bed time. For Gond. THE END New Units Drakyn fucked around with this message at 00:22 on Feb 16, 2017 |
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Feb 15, 2017 00:09
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| # ¿ Apr 23, 2024 22:44 |
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the thread posted:gently caress mammals  Glazius posted:drat. All that pollution caught up with you, huh? Thank you all for all of your kind words. I had basically two goals when making this LP: (1) at least show pop-ups for every single thing in the scenario, with wonder videos being an oh why the hell not sort of thing; and (2) replicate as best as possible the experience of being ten and clueless, which came naturally. As proof of my gratitude, have this postscript that I created by putting this script inside this post. We are finished. The first thing we have to do now that we're finished is add more crap. You know what's full of crap? Guts. Let's look in them. BONUS UPDATE 3: The Guts of Gond.  These are them. The guts. Like real guts they're all balled up in one confusing wad. Let's fix that.  There. Much tidier. Now we can see that things can be easily sorted into four simple file types. -The GIF files, which are full of PICTURES. -The SAV files, which are full of BULLSHIT and TOOLING AROUND and PRACTICE RUNS. -The SCN file, which is full of IMPORTANT and NOT TO BE TOUCHED. -The TXT files, which are full of THINGS YOU CAN SCREW AROUND WITH. Now let's look at some pictures.   Here you can see what all our cities looked like as well as what they didn't. You can also see all the little bits of terrain, chopped up and waiting to be plated. Many tile resources shown here are not actually in this scenario! Can you guess which? I hope you can.  Here you can see the good hardworking citizens of Gond and elsewhere. From left to right: ultra happy, very happy, alright, feeling fine, melancholic, testy, irate, entertainer, taxman, and scientist. You can not tell from this picture, but the scientist's frill is full of beakers. Also, he has a beak. Enough pictures. Let's move on to hard data for hard facts for hardnosed folks.    The CITY.TXT document is full of default names for people who are too unimaginative to create their own. Each civilization has its own special set so it can feel special. As you can see, some of the 'filler' civilizations that come after the first set have more...eclectic naming systems. The Stones and First Ones not only are odd even compared to their neighbours, they aren't able to appear at all - at least as far as I know. I don't know very far. We will see them again. Later.  Odd. All of our barbarians looked like dinosaurs to me. Let's move on.  DINOSAUR.TXT is simply the opening blurb you get to read at the very beginning of the scenario. EVENTS.TXT defines how, when and where the map shifts around as time wears on, as well as the mandated whoopsie circa 65 million years ago. I am bad at numbers and unable to verify precisely what changes take place where, although that 'seas shift' event will force a land bridge to form between Australia and south Laurasia, to keep the civilization starting there from getting lonely.  GAME.TXT is dialogue strings for everything from saving your game to cussing out your neighbours and is very very big. Most of it is unaltered from vanilla Civ 2 or simply wordswapping 'settlers' for 'Thecos.' and the like, except for a few choice passages. LABELS.TXT and PEDIA.TXT are exactly what they sound like and the civilopedia text, respectively. Since this is a scenario there are no handy factsheets available in our civilopedia, so we will never get a chance to read up on the history behind the advent of the agora, or who built the Earthworks and why. Paleontology is full of mysteries.     RULES.TXT is where you go to make things happen. Change tech names and dependencies. Change improvements. Change Wonder availability. Change any of a dozen moving parts on any of the units. Change terrain names and values.  Also, here's the full cast of characters that can populate the world. Overall, I feel that although Stompy is an inferior name to Rex, it is probably better than Grunch. Again, the Stones and First Ones are the odd ones out. One canon leader apiece, and while the rest of the world is aggressive-expansionist-militaristic the Stony are aggressive-perfectionist-civilized and the First are rational-expansionist-civilized. What's up with them? Who knows? You can't even view them in the in-game editor's tribe editor; they functionally only exist in these two .txt files. The mind woggles. Well, that is that. And this is this. Wipe off your hands and wash them a bit before you leave. For hygiene. Drakyn fucked around with this message at 00:35 on Feb 16, 2017 |
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Feb 16, 2017 00:20
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