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  ------------------------------   Sunday, Jan 19th! The Royal Rumble Match!! 30 Participants including: Brock Lesnar, Goldberg, Undertaker, Chris Jericho, New Day, Braun Strowman, Baron Corbin, Seth Rollins, The Miz, Dean Ambrose, Sheamus, Cesaro, Dolph Ziggler, and more! WWE Universal Title Match - Chris Jericho is Suspended Above the Ring Kevin Owens (c) vs. Roman Reigns WWE Championship Match AJ Styles (c) vs. John Cena WWE Raw Women's Championship Match Charlotte Flair (c) vs. Bayley WWE Cruiserweight Championship Match Rich Swann (c) vs. Neville ------------------------------ Raw Results Raw opened with Roman Reigns coming out and cutting promo about being unbeatable in a 1 on 1 situation unlike the handicap match last week. Paul Heyman comes out and introduces himself as the calm before the storm because Brock Lesnar is at Raw tonight. Heyman says it doesn't matter who the champion is because spoilers for the Rumble, Brock is going to conquer 29 other men and go on to Wrestlemania. Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho come out and they talk about everyone making predictions tonight and being absolutely wrong. Jericho says the only predictions that matter is that Owens retains the Universal title and Jericho wins the Rumble so that the Best Friends have a US Universal championship match at Mania. Seth Rollins comes out and states that with all these predictions for the Rumble and Mania if there are any two people who should know how unpredictable Mania can be its them. Braun Strowman comes down and he gets right in Roman Reigns face when Brock Lesnar's music hits. Brock makes his way to the ring as Sami Zayn jumps Braun. Brock Lesnar then lays waste to everyone but Braun Strowman, who just stares him down and leaves. Enzo and Big Cass defeated Jinder Mahal and Rusev. Jack Gallagher joined the commentary booth for a Cruiserweight match where Ariya Daivari defeated Lince Dorado. WWE runs a promo package about how great the United Kingdom Championship tournament. They swerve that segment into a segment where Sasha Banks is training in the ring before Raw and Nia Jax attacks her and re-injures Sasha's leg. Gallows and Anderson defeat Sheamus and Cesaro in a WWE Raw Tag Team Championship match by DQ. Originally a second ref counted 3 for The Club but Sheamus hit the main referee accidentally for the DQ. WWE payed tribute to a murderer. Emmalina is still loving appearing soon. Sami Zayn cuts a neurotic embarrassing promo next to Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns and wants to do the Shield fist but they blow him off for being a nerd. Rich Swann comes out to the ring to have a match with Tony Nese but gets jumped by Neville proving for once that Neville and Nese are two different men. Nese tries to get in on the action attacking Swann but Neville gets tired of it and tosses him out of the ring so he can attack Neville more on his own. Neville is interviewed backstage about why he would attack Swann before their Rumble match. Neville tells him that is a stupid question and anyone who says they wouldn't do something similar is a hypocrite. New Day are out to talk about how stacked the Royal Rumble is. Not only are Goldberg, Brock Lesnar, and Undertaker in the Rumble so is the entire New Day. It's every man for himself and friends become foes. When one of the New Day wins, then they all win! New Day are gonna win the Rumble with Freebird rules and defend the Universal Title that way too! Titus O'Neil comes out again to get in New Day's business again. This time he says he's doesn't want to be a part of New Day, he wants to replace New Day. He asks one of them to remove themselves from the Rumble and give him their spot. They said no, so he said he's gonna take it then in a match and asks one of them to accept his challenge. Big E agrees and says if he win Titus leaves New Day alone. Big E defeats Titus O'Neil to keep his spot in the Rumble. Charlotte comes out for what was supposed to be a promo about being undefeated in PPVs. Instead she digs up old photos of Bayley with wrestlers as she was growing up and the poems and essays she wrote as a teen and wanting to be a pro wrestler. Charlotte mocks her for being a fan and having passion and dreams. Bayley comes out and says some people weren't handed things in life just because they wanted it. She says that she's not sorry for actually having the passion for wrestling and being a fan unlike Charlotte. She then makes up a couple of bad poems about being the next Raw Women's Champion. Jeri-KO come up to Braun backstage and try talking him into doing their dirty work again like times in the past. Braun tells them they don't get it. He does what he wants when he wants. At the Rumble he's going to eliminate everyone and then at Mania he will become Universal Champ. But tonight he's gonna make Roman, Seth, and Sami scream in pain. Cedric Alexander defeated The Brian Kendrick. Noam Dar was watching backstage as Alicia Fox came out to sort of help Cedric win. She wanted to celebrate with Cedric but he just ducks under her and leaves. Nia Jax is interviewed about The Boss Sasha Banks. Nia laughs that people are still calling her The Boss when she's nothing but a little girl who crumples in front of real women like her. Mike Rome attempts to interview Alicia Fox but she snaps at him. Kurt Angle is announced on Raw as the first member of the 2017 WWE Hall of Fame. Strowman, Jericho and Owens defeated Zayn, Rollins, and Roman when Strowman pinned Sami. Strowman took Sami up the ramp to put through the announce table but Rollins and Reigns saved Sami. They were then going to put Strowman through it, but Jeri-KO attacked them. Jeri-KO teased putting Roman through the announce table like the Shield did but Rollins saved him. Rollins laid out Jericho with a pedigree on the ramp. Owens then took out both Roman and Rollins with a chair before putting Roman through the announce table to end Raw.
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Jan 17, 2017 05:07
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Rest in Piss, Reigns
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Jan 17, 2017 05:08
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Not cool of them to announce Angle's induction on MLK day. He said himself he wasn't a big fan of "the blacks."
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Jan 17, 2017 05:08
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Defiance Industries posted:Not cool of them to announce Angle's induction on MLK day. He said himself he wasn't a big fan of "the blacks."
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Jan 17, 2017 05:09
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I love the drat product.
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Jan 17, 2017 05:10
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Defiance Industries posted:Not cool of them to announce Angle's induction on MLK day. He said himself he wasn't a big fan of "the blacks." The black people.
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Jan 17, 2017 05:11
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I'm looking forward to tomorrow I get to rewatch Series of Unfortunate Events 
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Jan 17, 2017 05:12
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Kurt Angle rules and I'm glad he's back.... and especially glad it won't be in a wrestling capacity!
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Jan 17, 2017 05:14
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ClSrdqQ0PLQ Re-make the Shield but with Sami. gently caress it. I'll cheer. I'll cheer your precious Roman if you do this for me, Vince.
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Jan 17, 2017 05:15
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raw was largely bad but kevin owens finally did something mean and didnt look like a punk for precisely the second time in his entire reign (the other being standing up to goldberg) solid C- minus show see you tomorrow
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Jan 17, 2017 05:15
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Also
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Jan 17, 2017 05:17
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They are killing Vinces Snuka tweet.
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Jan 17, 2017 05:17
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I want Sami Zayn to win the Royal Rumble. I know this makes me a Foolish Mark but I care not.
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Jan 17, 2017 05:18
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I wish they could work the hall of fame news into the show in any other way but "has reported on WWE dot com." Basically I just wanted an excuse for his music to play and for him to come out unexpected because I would be popping so hard I'd watch WWE for a month without poo poo posting about it
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Jan 17, 2017 05:18
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kidcoelacanth posted:I want Sami Zayn to win the Royal Rumble. I know this makes me a Foolish Mark but I care not. Well, he has a better chance of winning than Titus O'Neal at least.
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Jan 17, 2017 05:21
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https://twitter.com/totaldivaseps/status/821162508480344066
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Jan 17, 2017 05:22
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Sami had a pretty good Charlie Day impression going there.
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Jan 17, 2017 05:22
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Sami should win the Royal Rumble
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Jan 17, 2017 05:23
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if you actually look back at the historic episode of historic raw, you'll find that everyone loves ROMAN REIGNS and nobody has said anything bad about ROMAN REIGNS
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Jan 17, 2017 05:24
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That was poos
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Jan 17, 2017 05:25
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lmao
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Jan 17, 2017 05:27
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Hahahahah I remember seeing this guy in the Mark Remark, then I saw him in today's episode and I was like "hey wait a sec  "
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Jan 17, 2017 05:27
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Things we learned from Ride Along tonight: James Ellsworth has known Gillberg since grade school where he was the janitor and is an Avril Lavigne fan. Slater is as dumb as he looks but who cares he's goofy.
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Jan 17, 2017 05:30
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I wish Braun and Neville could be friends as they are giant men (for their divisions) who just love destroying chumps
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Jan 17, 2017 05:30
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jfc
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Jan 17, 2017 05:32
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Tato posted:I wish Braun and Neville could be friends as they are giant men (for their divisions) who just love destroying chumps Corbin: Can I hang out too guys?
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Jan 17, 2017 05:32
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Blaise330 posted:Corbin: Can I hang out too guys? 3 Lone Wolves
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Jan 17, 2017 05:34
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BROCK LESBIAN posted:3 Lone Wolves Someone Photoshop them onto three wolf moon
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Jan 17, 2017 05:37
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The only wolf I need is Ember Moon. Speaking of which, I haven't been watching NXT. How many Mortal Kombat chars are there now? Also does whoever this is live up the having such an awesome theme? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iiZrbz08WRo
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Jan 17, 2017 05:43
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Man, is it just me or was CFO$ killing it like all year last year? Wow.
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Jan 17, 2017 05:55
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lv10EMwg1qI https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQaBEPDyhXw
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Jan 17, 2017 05:56
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The original photo was doubleplusungood.
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Jan 17, 2017 06:05
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Its funny and sad that Braun is improving at a much faster rate than Roman ever did.
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Jan 17, 2017 06:13
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Evil Canadian posted:Its funny and sad that Braun is improving at a much faster rate than Roman ever did. Well, Braun is the only guy who week-over-week is booked to his strengths. Like, yes, he is definitely showing improvement, but he is very much protected too in a way that literally nobody else in Raw, maybe even in the company, including Roman, is.
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Jan 17, 2017 06:17
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Evil Canadian posted:Its funny and sad that Braun is improving at a much faster rate than Roman ever did. Braun's booked the way basically everyone thinks he should be booked
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Jan 17, 2017 06:21
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VJeff posted:Man, is it just me or was CFO$ killing it like all year last year? Wow. CFO$ is awesome.
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Jan 17, 2017 06:23
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I was thinking about cheerful Kurt Angle memories and remembered when Angle was feuding with Undertaker (American Badass version). They were on a PPV and Kurt finds Taker's bike but instead of being dastardly about it, he gets all goofy impressed with it like a kid and hops on it to pretend he's riding it. Then Undertaker shows up and spots him and the camera does this beautiful crash zoom on Angle making a  face. Or there was that Austin heel run stuff, so many great moments between the two but one that always cracked me up was when he insisted angrily he didn't need any help fighting Booker T. He proceeds to get his rear end kicked, runs backstage to find Vince and Austin and shouts,"WHERE WERE YOU GUYS!?!  " at them.Or or the night he won the title from Austin and all the WWE guys came out to celebrate with him and when he saw Undertaker he crashed into him for a hug like Taker was his daddy, and Taker just gently pats him on the shoulder  Or or or the time he did the Ho-Down with Edge and Christian! Or or or or the time he and Brock Lesnar were sitting around backstage chugging gallons of milk! Kurt Angle owns.
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Jan 17, 2017 06:23
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So. ... Is it Ankle Lock or Angle Lock? Also, does it stand for Randy's Knock Out or Randy Keith Orton? ALSO, is it Last Ride or Last Rites?! 
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Jan 17, 2017 06:26
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VJeff posted:So. Angle Lock if Angle's the one doing it Randy Keith Orton's RKO Last Ride
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Jan 17, 2017 06:33
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Jerusalem posted:I was thinking about cheerful Kurt Angle memories and remembered when Angle was feuding with Undertaker (American Badass version). They were on a PPV and Kurt finds Taker's bike but instead of being dastardly about it, he gets all goofy impressed with it like a kid and hops on it to pretend he's riding it. Then Undertaker shows up and spots him and the camera does this beautiful crash zoom on Angle making a My favroite Angle thing is a tie between 2 things, one silly, one not 1) After he and WGTT had started to show issues with cohesion, there was a segment where Kurt gave them poo poo for something, and then talked about how they needed to get their own drat music, because they were getting "You Suck" chants, and he earned those chants, but they hadn't yet. 2) I loved how they sold that if Kurt grapevined the Angle lock, your rear end was cooked. They did an awesome job of protecting the hold.
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Jan 17, 2017 06:34
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