Post about your worst date nights itt

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Post about your worst date nights itt

Nooner: Mar 26, 2011; AN A+ OPSTER (:

Will girls in the Gaming Community date me too OP? Also are they asian? I want an asian girl from the Gaming Community to date

# ? Feb 27, 2017 23:00

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# ? Apr 19, 2024 19:34

Cough Drop The Beat: Jan 22, 2012; by Lowtax

I made a turn around 360 degrees and walk away Xbox joke and she was really offended because she was a Xbox fangirl. The date ended right there. Man, dating in the gaming community is tough.

# ? Feb 27, 2017 23:00

Spandex Bonerlord: Sep 30, 2014

I went to her house to gently caress but was met by Chris Hansen instead.

# ? Feb 27, 2017 23:02

Carmant: Nov 23, 2015; Treadmill? What's that? Is that some kind of cake?

She texted me saying that she should have killed me when she had the chance because I didnt immediately text her when I got home. Needless to say the second date was pretty awkward. Now she stalks me I think.

# ? Feb 27, 2017 23:02

Fuck da Mods: Jun 27, 2013; fina get poz'd?

acquired genital herpas

# ? Feb 27, 2017 23:04

a bone to pick: Sep 14, 2011; by FactsAreUseless

he "leveled up"

# ? Feb 27, 2017 23:09

Ichabod Tane: Oct 30, 2005; A most notable
coward, an infinite and endless liar, an hourly promise breaker, the owner of no one good quality.

https://youtu.be/_Ojd0BdtMBY?t=4

Up down up down left right left right start select OP has to blow me now - gaming community credo

# ? Feb 27, 2017 23:14

kazr: Jan 28, 2005

the date was over so quick i almost forgot to pay her. embarrassing!

# ? Feb 27, 2017 23:16

Captain Yossarian: Feb 24, 2011; All new" Rings of Fire"

I'm gay

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? Feb 27, 2017 23:18

soy: Jul 7, 2003; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Met this pretty hot girl that went to my college... She came over and we were doing various sex acts. When we finished doing the sex, she left.

She did not want to hang out again, I don't think I did a good enough sex or whatever. It is too bad, because she was hot. RIP

# ? Feb 27, 2017 23:19

Nooner: Mar 26, 2011; AN A+ OPSTER (:

Captain Yossarian posted:

I'm gay

GAYmer Community ami right????

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? Feb 27, 2017 23:21

Captain Yossarian: Feb 24, 2011; All new" Rings of Fire"

Nooner posted:

GAYmer Community ami right????

Holy moly!! :discourse:

# ? Feb 27, 2017 23:22

computer angel: Sep 9, 2008; Make it a double.

gently caress da Mods posted:

acquired genital herpas

Genital sherpas was the best thing to ever happen to me. They prevent novice adventurers from succumbing to my inhospitable conditions.

# ? Feb 28, 2017 02:10

YeahTubaMike: Mar 24, 2005; *hic* Gotta finish thish . . .; Doctor Rope

i went on my first date at the age of 15, and it was a chaperoned-ish double date with an older teenage/early 20s couple, and the guy from the older couple hit on me

# ? Feb 28, 2017 02:57

Beet Wagon: Oct 19, 2015

A long time ago I got pulled over on a date and found out I had a suspended license (turns out you should really pay your speeding tickets instead of just forgetting about them and playing video games). The nice police officer didn't take me to jail but obviously wouldn't let me drive home, so I had to teach my date how to drive a stick shift in the parking lot so she could drive us home. Super embarrassing at the time, but kind of funny now.

# ? Feb 28, 2017 03:10

Arrhythmia: Jul 22, 2011

My first date my date went in for a hug and I fuckin' strong armed her away ha ha

# ? Feb 28, 2017 03:12

whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

Nooner posted:

Dark Souls is too hard, I like fun games like candy crush and farmville

if it cant be played while pooping then flush it

# ? Feb 28, 2017 03:38

hey welcome to the show!: Jan 22, 2014; nobody loves me

I dated this girl once that was only interested in me because she wanted to get with one of my friends who was only interested in getting with one of our other friends girlfriend. Also he introduced me to her.

Any how, our first date she wanted me to take her to a graveyard were we met up with the friend of mine that she was trying to make jealous and they literally pranced through the graveyard saying that they could see ghosts.

She was the first girl who let me touch her boobs. :allears:

# ? Feb 28, 2017 03:44

Say Nothing: Mar 5, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

# ? Feb 28, 2017 03:57

ScratchAndSniff: Sep 28, 2008; This game stinks

Monday is probably the worst date night, followed closely by Tuesday and Wednesday. Thursday-Sunday are all fine.

# ? Feb 28, 2017 04:20

Metaline: Aug 20, 2003

Once a guy bit a hole in my lip while we were making out. Sorry, twice. He did that twice.

Once a guy said "I love you" the first time I gave him a blow job and was Christian and then started to talk about how we were going to get married.

Once a guy's dog pissed on his bed while we were loving and he kept going. He also refused to take his t-shirt off.

Once a guy had stretched lobes and strung his earbuds through them and told me that his favourite webpage was The Chive.

# ? Feb 28, 2017 04:42

warez: Mar 13, 2003; HOLA FANTA DONT CHA WANNA?

I met this dude on grindr and went on a date with him to see "Black Swan." While we were in line to get some popcorn, within about 10 minutes of meeting for the first time, I mentioned that my sis was pregnant and he started getting teary and told me he was heartbroken that he'll never experience the joy of giving birth

I gave him a sidehug after the movie was done because I'm developmentally stunted and can't handle displays of emotion

# ? Feb 28, 2017 04:47

Tonetta: Jul 9, 2013; look mother look at ME MOTHER MOTHER I AM A HOMESTIXK NOW

**methodically removes and eats own clothes*

Metaline posted:

Once a guy said "I love you" the first time I gave him a blow job and was Christian and then started to talk about how we were going to get married.

Wasn't this a thing most teens experienced (one way or the other) during one of their first sexual encounters? If he was out of high school lmao what a bitch

Metaline posted:

Once a guy had stretched lobes and strung his earbuds through them and told me that his favourite webpage was The Chive.

I know a guy like this, he pretends to be a hyper straight Christian but one time when I was pre tran he tried to blow me and then several times post tran he tried to blow me and touch me in a hosed up way

I heard he voted trump.

# ? Feb 28, 2017 04:51

Metaline: Aug 20, 2003

Tonetta posted:

Wasn't this a thing most teens experienced (one way or the other) during one of their first sexual encounters? If he was out of high school lmao what a bitch

He was 23!

# ? Feb 28, 2017 05:00

Masturbasturd: Sep 1, 2014

Went to pick up Karen for pizza & beer, wound up taking along her fat 10 year old brother with Suzy the Sock, riding in the back seat.
Suzy the Sock was very loud and disagreeable. Pizza Hut wasn't good enough.

# ? Feb 28, 2017 05:23

TheSpamalope: Dec 30, 2008; by sebmojo; Lipstick Apathy

I've never had a bad date in my life sorry op try not being a judgemental rear end in a top hat

# ? Feb 28, 2017 05:30

Crash_N_Burn: Apr 19, 2014

She was riding me and I projectile vomited directly upwards and back down onto my face. We did not finish

# ? Feb 28, 2017 05:34

TenementFunster: Feb 20, 2003; Can't post for 6 days!

Tonetta posted:

I get set up for a blind date by a lady friend within the gaming community

but for real, this is a powerful self-own

# ? Feb 28, 2017 05:35

Second Hand Meat Mouth: Sep 12, 2001

Crash_N_Burn posted:

She was riding me and I projectile vomited directly upwards and back down onto my face. We did not finish

How much splatter?

# ? Feb 28, 2017 05:36

Teikanmi: Dec 16, 2006; by R. Guyovich

Should have dated a LoL player

Like at least they are competitive, not playing that casual console poo poo am I right?

# ? Feb 28, 2017 05:37

Crash_N_Burn: Apr 19, 2014

500 good dogs posted:

How much splatter?

None on her, thankfully

# ? Feb 28, 2017 05:39

Tonetta: Jul 9, 2013; look mother look at ME MOTHER MOTHER I AM A HOMESTIXK NOW

**methodically removes and eats own clothes*

TenementFunster posted:

but for real, this is a powerful self-own

it was intentional

# ? Feb 28, 2017 05:44

TenementFunster: Feb 20, 2003; Can't post for 6 days!

Tonetta posted:

it was intentional

oh, i'm sure. many attractive people with lots of options go on blind dates with other members of "video game communities"

# ? Feb 28, 2017 05:48

clone on the phone: Aug 5, 2003

This can be a good and funny thread if given the chance.

I once met this smoking hot chick at a club. We were both smashed out of our minds on everything and I ended up taking her home for a drug and alcohol fueled all night sex romp. Something seemed a little weird about the way she spoke but I thought whatever it's probably because we're both just blasted to the moon. Fast forward to the next weekend after chatting on messenger we decided to go on a proper date. Turns out she had this weird delayed speech where you'd ask her something and there would be an extra 15 or so seconds before she'd say anything.

Turns out when she was born she lost oxygen to her brain for a couple minutes and was actually clinically or legally or whatever, retarded. Then she told me she loved me and she wanted to move in with me and have my babies. Of course I made my excuses and left. Supermodel quality looks and an absolute demon in bed but unfortunately a literal broke brain retard.

# ? Feb 28, 2017 05:49

TheSpamalope: Dec 30, 2008; by sebmojo; Lipstick Apathy

Tonetta posted:

it was intentional

Just like that time I got caught making GBS threads in the slide at school and everyone laughed and laughed! We are funny

# ? Feb 28, 2017 05:49

PromethiumX: Mar 5, 2003

So wait.... OP is a MtoF transexual who was thinking she was going to get some butt play from a girl.

Is that right?

# ? Feb 28, 2017 06:00

clone on the phone: Aug 5, 2003

PromethiumX posted:

So wait.... OP is a MtoF transexual who was thinking she was going to get some butt play from a girl.

Is that right?

Does it matter? It was a funny story.

# ? Feb 28, 2017 06:02

Cnut the Great: Mar 30, 2014

clone on the phone posted:

This can be a good and funny thread if given the chance.

I once met this smoking hot chick at a club. We were both smashed out of our minds on everything and I ended up taking her home for a drug and alcohol fueled all night sex romp. Something seemed a little weird about the way she spoke but I thought whatever it's probably because we're both just blasted to the moon. Fast forward to the next weekend after chatting on messenger we decided to go on a proper date. Turns out she had this weird delayed speech where you'd ask her something and there would be an extra 15 or so seconds before she'd say anything.

Turns out when she was born she lost oxygen to her brain for a couple minutes and was actually clinically or legally or whatever, retarded. Then she told me she loved me and she wanted to move in with me and have my babies. Of course I made my excuses and left. Supermodel quality looks and an absolute demon in bed but unfortunately a literal broke brain retard.

Wait so you hosed a retard?

# ? Feb 28, 2017 06:10

Grem: Mar 29, 2004; It's how her species communicates

PromethiumX posted:

So wait.... OP is a MtoF transexual who was thinking she was going to get some butt play from a girl.

Is that right?

You don't have to understand how anything other than cis-gendered sex works, and it's best if you don't try.

# ? Feb 28, 2017 06:13

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# ? Apr 19, 2024 19:34

Tonetta: Jul 9, 2013; look mother look at ME MOTHER MOTHER I AM A HOMESTIXK NOW

**methodically removes and eats own clothes*

Cnut the Great posted:

Wait so you hosed a retard?

If retards weren't allowed to gently caress you would die a virgin

# ? Feb 28, 2017 06:14

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