|
It makes weird noises when it cycles, and I'm afraid it's reaching out for it's dead owner.
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2017 23:19
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 25, 2024 18:17 |
|
|
when my mom died we found a brand new microwave, still in box, in the house. no idea what she intended to do with it. I've never used it but I can report no supernatural events in its vicinity.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2017 23:23
|
|
|
the other day i went to an estate sale where not a single loving thing was made past like 1971 it was p creepy
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2017 23:27
|
|
|
If you cook a hot pocket and some of it is boiling hot and some is still frozen, you should probably call an exorcist.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2017 23:29
|
|
|
prolly wiretapped
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2017 23:30
|
|
|
*rushes into thread out of breath* Did someone say microwave's mom??
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2017 23:34
|
|
|
myDad posted:*rushes into thread out of breath* Did someone say microwave's mom??
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2017 23:35
|
|
|
The problem with haunted microwaves is that roughly 30% of the microwave energy is converted to psychokinetic energy (PKE) that the souls of the damned require for continued manifestation in this plane. This means that you will have to adjust your cooking times to account for this and that your microwave will have additional wear and tear on the magnetron as well as increased energy consumption. You may find that the higher energy costs and more frequent repairs offset the so-called "bargain" you thought you were getting when you bought the microwave second-hand.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2017 23:48
|
|
|
We used to have one of these at the future centre, its bad news. Really bad news!!
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2017 23:50
|
|
|
Axolotl posted:The problem with haunted microwaves is that roughly 30% of the microwave energy is converted to psychokinetic energy (PKE) that the souls of the damned require for continued manifestation in this plane. This means that you will have to adjust your cooking times to account for this and that your microwave will have additional wear and tear on the magnetron as well as increased energy consumption. You may find that the higher energy costs and more frequent repairs offset the so-called "bargain" you thought you were getting when you bought the microwave second-hand. Can I just replace the magnetron? I mean, I got a really good deal on this microwave.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2017 23:58
|
|
|
Stay safe, microwave ghost.
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:04
|
|
|
put ur dick in it
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:06
|
|
|
Korthal posted:Can I just replace the magnetron? I mean, I got a really good deal on this microwave. Just crack that baby open and poke around a bit, see what's in there.
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:06
|
|
|
BluesShaman posted:Stay safe, microwave ghost. heineken? gently caress that poo poo!!! pabst blue ribbon!!
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:05
|
|
|
Hold a tape recorder inside and let the appliance run in ten seconds increments, check the tape for any weird noises indicating paranormal influence
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:08
|
|
|
Korthal posted:Can I just replace the magnetron? I mean, I got a really good deal on this microwave. Unfortunately, no. The ghosts haunt the cooking chamber, not the magnetron. Think of it like a small house...the ghosts haunt the rooms, not the electrical outlets.
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:09
|
|
|
Microwaves are built on alien technology recovered from Roswell, and are therefore immune to being haunted.  Your dishwasher, though, is haunted as gently caress.
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:10
|
|
|
someone probly killed a cat in it or some twisted poo poo like that, throw it in the trash OP
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:11
|
|
|
No, OP, there's no such thing as "hauntings" or "ghosts" or any of that supernatural bullshit that you hear about in the mainstream media.
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:10
|
|
|
Korthal posted:Can I just replace the magnetron? I mean, I got a really good deal on this microwave.
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:13
|
|
|
microwave a fork. the ghost will get sucked into the fork and then you can put that dang ghost in a trash can.
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:18
|
|
|
suck the ghosts dick
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:18
|
|
|
500 good dogs posted:No, OP, there's no such thing as "hauntings" or "ghosts" or any of that supernatural bullshit that you hear about in the mainstream media. except yeah there are? get educated, your big dick is only gonna get you so far
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:21
|
|
|
It's spying on you, OP
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:24
|
|
|
I went to an estate sale once and they were selling like boxes of half-used bottles of shampoo and toothpaste and stuff and people were placings bids on them
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:25
|
|
|
gently caress this is one of the few things that gets me """"TRIGGERED""" just thinking about it. i was visiting my grandparents and they liked going to those things . I did not though i had never before, but i was just rifting through the boxes of poo poo and came across a really ridiculously old looking book in a box of books (like seriously its like whoever was doing the auction just tiped over bookshelves into boxes). i thought well this looks neat, then i opened it up and it was supposedly written in the 1800's and was a doctors manual thing. it was like a comprehensive book of "all knowledge" of the time. it was hilariously awful. it was so insanely detailed though with like a thousand bigass pages and tiny print and diagrams. i was getting pretty convinced it was a reproduction or something of a common book but it looked 100% real to me but anyway my grandma got tired and we never made it to that box. and besides, it was just some book. every box of books was going for like $1. i didnt think much of it i looked it up later and turns out it was written by a very famous doctor of the times and was considered the defacto standard for medical practice. he/they wrote a new revision every year for a long time and was particularly famous for later editions. however the one i saw was his first edition, literally the first one he mass released. I cant remember anymore but i think it was the 1860's. it was known when he started but there was NO PUBLICLY KNOWN COPY ANYMORE NOT EVEN IN A MUSEUM. IT HAD A ISBN NUMBER ASSIGNED TO IT AFTER THE FACT BUT EVEN THE NATIONAL LIBRARY DIDNT ACTUALLY OWN A COPY. MUCH MORE COMMON COPIES OF LATER EDITIONS WENT FOR THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS. THE FIRST YEAR BOOK HAD NO PRICE BECAUSE THERE ARE NO RECORDS OF IT EVER BEING SOLD I literally got angry typing that just now
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:25
|
|
|
1gnoirents posted:gently caress this is one of the few things that gets me """"TRIGGERED""" just thinking about it. i was visiting my grandparents and they liked going to those things . I did not though i had never before, but i was just rifting through the boxes of poo poo and came across a really ridiculously old looking book in a box of books (like seriously its like whoever was doing the auction just tiped over bookshelves into boxes). i thought well this looks neat, then i opened it up and it was supposedly written in the 1800's and was a doctors manual thing. it was like a comprehensive book of "all knowledge" of the time. it was hilariously awful. it was so insanely detailed though with like a thousand bigass pages and tiny print and diagrams. i was getting pretty convinced it was a reproduction or something of a common book but it looked 100% real to me same
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:27
|
|
|
500 good dogs posted:No, OP, there's no such thing as "hauntings" or "ghosts" or any of that supernatural bullshit that you hear about in the mainstream media.
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:27
|
|
|
that book sounds dum as hell
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:29
|
|
|
JiveHonky posted:except yeah there are? it's gotten me pretty far, so yeah can you blame me for assuming it's all i need?
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:28
|
|
|
microwave some chili in there and find out with beans
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:29
|
|
|
It's haunted. Get used to eating 'ghost tacos' , OP.
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:31
|
|
|
numberoneposter posted:microwave some chili in there and find out yesterday for dinner i had canned chili with beans that i heated up in the microwave was pretty good, as always
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:33
|
|
|
1gnoirents posted:gently caress this is one of the few things that gets me """"TRIGGERED""" just thinking about it. i was visiting my grandparents and they liked going to those things . I did not though i had never before, but i was just rifting through the boxes of poo poo and came across a really ridiculously old looking book in a box of books (like seriously its like whoever was doing the auction just tiped over bookshelves into boxes). i thought well this looks neat, then i opened it up and it was supposedly written in the 1800's and was a doctors manual thing. it was like a comprehensive book of "all knowledge" of the time. it was hilariously awful. it was so insanely detailed though with like a thousand bigass pages and tiny print and diagrams. i was getting pretty convinced it was a reproduction or something of a common book but it looked 100% real to me It was probably a book club edition. Book club editions aren't worth anything.
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:34
|
|
|
microwave ur balls
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:34
|
|
|
Hainted by the ghost of old apple pie, by now just as rotton as the american dream~
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:34
|
|
|
500 good dogs posted:No, OP, there's no such thing as "hauntings" or "ghosts" or any of that supernatural bullshit that you hear about in the mainstream media. Whoop whoop it's the fun police
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:37
|
|
|
imandyyo posted:Whoop whoop it's the fun police  syllable police
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:38
|
|
|
it's gonna make all your food taste old 
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:39
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 25, 2024 18:17 |
|
|
Back when I worked tech support for an ISP we got a call from a guy saying his mouse didn't work. Even though we were just an ISP we still ended up fielding all sorts of dumb computer questions, too, so this wasn't entirely unexpected. When asked what was going on with his mouse he said it had been acting kind of twitchy and his friend told him to microwave it for 30 seconds, so he did, and now it didn't work at all. Which one of you guys was that?
|
|
#
?
Mar 25, 2017 00:42
|
|