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claw game handjob
Mar 27, 2007

pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING

Screaming Idiot posted:

I used to love Gunstar Heroes. :smith:

I mean, yeah, they made great games (hi Alien Soldier), but as the era of licensed games died off and more and more projects were scrapped or delayed late in development, it bled the company of talent, which kept the downward spiral going as what titles they did make were less and less impressive... etc.

If you look at 2010 onwards for them it's almost entirely remakes and budget titles. Their last high was with Astro Boy on GBA and then it all collapsed.

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chiasaur11
Oct 22, 2012



END ME SCOOB posted:

I mean, yeah, they made great games (hi Alien Soldier), but as the era of licensed games died off and more and more projects were scrapped or delayed late in development, it bled the company of talent, which kept the downward spiral going as what titles they did make were less and less impressive... etc.

If you look at 2010 onwards for them it's almost entirely remakes and budget titles. Their last high was with Astro Boy on GBA and then it all collapsed.

I thought Gunstar Super Heroes was pretty alright. Had some screen size problems, but it was distinct enough from the original to feel worthwhile in its own right.

Archenteron
Nov 3, 2006

:marc:

Fabulousvillain posted:

I think this would be a fight between Taro and Kojima over creative control that Kojima would win because Taro is drunk. The combat would be fun if it weren't for Suda 51 forcing some lovely mechanics into it, and it would run out of budget 1/2 into the story because Kojima spent it all on making refracting light physics. What I'm saying is this game would be bad, but it would be successful.

And then the Moon crashes into the Earth and everyone dies, the end, no moral.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
The moon is revealed to be the biggest Emil head of all. :yokotaro:

Sage Grimm
Feb 18, 2013

Let's go explorin' little dude!
Very Gurren Lagann-esque, that. Instead of spirals upon spirals, it's grinning madness happiness upon grinning insanity joy.

The Dark Id
Aug 13, 2005

Why
you
know
I
LOVE
THIS SHIT !!!!
[citation needed]


Episode LXXII: The Golden Boy



Back on the road again. Now that we’ve settled things in the Resistance Camp again, it’s off to the Desert Zone to investigate the weirdness going on out there and rediscover how bishonen villains are born. I’m sure the actual Sephiroth’s birth was quite similar. It probably just involved a womb of writhing belts and zippers instead of machines.


Music: City Ruins - Shade (Dynamic)




There isn’t anything new story wise on the way to the Desert Zone. However, 9S and 2B do run into a bit of an anomaly on the way to their destination...



Mmm? Enemy detected! Go! Show no mercy! Glory to machine lifeforms!
Whoa! They’re speaking.



These are the same Golden Machines we saw towards the end of Route A over at the Flooded City. If you’ll remember back then, we opted to leave them alone because it was a 15-20 minute grind to hack down just the one Goliath Biped unit and the angry talkative Stubby was nigh invulnerable. This is still the case with 9S. Our sword strikes are virtually ineffective against these Golden machine’s shining armor.



Their interior, however, is quite susceptible to hacking and 9S can access their inner circuitry in short order.





There’s another hacking game variation encountered here. It’s all rather self-explanatory. The goal is still to take down the core orb’s shield and shatter it to complete the hack. Here we’re introduced to a few new units. White blocks are invincible and both our shots as well as enemy energy orbs cannot pass through ‘em. Likewise, the white tips of those enemy units are invincible as well. 9S needs to strafe behind ‘em to take those out as they slowly pursue him firing energy orbs.





Instead of 20 minutes hacking away at one of these machines, it instead takes two sessions of hacking into a Golden Goliath Biped to blow it to bits. Have I mentioned hacking is extremely powerful recently? Hacking is extremely powerful.







The other Golden Goliath yields another new mini-game. I’ve left instances of new hacking sessions in the Highlight Reel video at the end of the update if you wanna see them in action. Red blocks are invincible, like the white blocks, but also will damage 9S’s avatar if he runs into ‘em. The black cylinders are stationary enemies and will fire slow homing missiles towards 9S’s avatar. They take a few hits to destroy, unlike the rest of the enemy units which are one-shot affairs.

I can’t remember if I mentioned it earlier, but the orange orbs can be destroyed by 9S’s fire but purple orbs are invincible and must just be avoided. Unlike the Flight Unit shmup sections, there’s no physical attack to cheese through getting good at bullet hell shooters. Learn to dodge!



The Golden Stubby, which according to Unit Data is known as the “Courageous Brother,” is quite annoyed once we’ve hacked in and annihilated his companions. Which is understandable. It must take a while for a Stubby to paint something that big gold. Imagine all that work going to waste.





Don’t worry, bud. You’ll be joining them shortly! Well... kinda shortly... It actually takes SIX hacks to deplete all of the Courageous Brother’s HP. Granted, they’re all the very basic “single orb floats around slowly” hacks of all Stubby and lesser common machines. Still, that thing had a ridiculous amount of HP to be that durable.





The Courageous Brother damns us before exploding and yielding a valuable Machine Core (more valuable now as sell prices have increased alongside merchant prices) and more importantly a “Powerup Part S” which is a unique drop vital to upgrading our Pods. There’s more angry Golden Machines out in the wild. They’re all unique encounters even though there’s no associated sidequest with disposing of them all.



In any case, that’s a wrap for that peculiar machine. Let’s continue our mission out into the desert. There’s no need to talk to the scout at the Resistance FOB on the edge of town this time around. So we can just mosey on to the City Ruins/Desert Zone buffer zone where Jackass is hanging out. As we enter the region, we receive that the same transmission from the Council of Humanity we picked up in 2B’s exploits as protagonist.


Music: Memories of Dust (Quiet)




We would really like to get off the moon and hope to achieve this goal one day. No rush or anything to our cherished androids. We have commemorated the next lunar colony beer pong session in honor of your courage. Glory to mankind.
Wasn’t the last transmission the same exact message except they commemorated a barbecue cookout in our honor...? You think they could at least mix up the wording or something.








Before we go link up with Jackass, we’re going to take a little detour. To the immediate east past the Resistance outpost, there’s a cliffside path leading to the caverns beneath this region. We briefly spelunked down here back when we were doing Emil’s Lunar Tear sidequest. But there’s something of note here now that we have 9S in the leading role.





There’s a padlocked gate in the central part of this cave that 9S can pass via hacking. This leads to a pair of chained boulders and some electric-shield wielding Desert Zone machines. This might be the only place where electric shield equipped Facade cosplayer hang out and that counts as another unique Unit Data entry, even if they’re functionally identical to the normal electric-shield Medium Bipeds.





A quick series of hacking will take out those pesky machines in short order. Should have specced into the firewall class instead, chumps. This leaves behind the actual reason we came down here: Another new weapon!



Cruel Blood Oath is 9S’s equivalent to 2B’s Virtuous Treaty in being straight up the same exact sword in all regards (literally the same exact stats and combo potential) except tinted black and gaining Dark Impulse (Attack Power Up when 9S is nearly dead) instead of Holy Blessing. Perhaps its Weapon History can differentiate it...

Cruel Blood Oath posted:



I'll never forget the time we met. I knew ours was a love that would
last for eternity.

But even when by his side, his feelings were a mystery. It was
painful not to know what he was thinking. So painful.

When I was close, I hurt him. Yet being distant hurt him more.

I finally found my place in life. A place where I am as close as
possible, yet eternally distant.

I’m sure that’s just an odd rambling prose and definitely not talking about anyone we might know. No sirrah. Moving right along...





While we’re down here and I’ve jacked a Medium Biped’s body, let’s grab a couple other 9S-only treasure boxes we’ve ran across in our travels as 2B. We passed two of ‘em during that Lunar Tear trek in this area.



The first is at the end of the pass leading up to that first jump towards the Lunar Tear. If you’re wondering, there’s no need to be in a machine lifeform body. It’s just for funsies. :v:



Our reward is the first in MANY of 9S’s hackable chest rewards: lore. There are tons of files containing all sorts of random world building bullshit 9S can unlock from documents on the original NieR’s backstory to additional info about the assorted areas to parking tickets.



Most of these documents get sorted into the Old World Information tab of the Intel Archives. Our first entry is some idiot getting trolled on April Fools by coming into the office for a fake meeting. Nice job, idiot!





There’s a second hacking locked chest located in the same crevice Emil’s Lunar Tear is in. This one’s a bit more interesting. Hey, did you ever long for more of Facade's weird rules? Well guess what, pal! You’re in luck!



Obviously. You’ve got to build your seafront cottages on stilts. C’mon, guys. That’s like basic stuff.





Do you think Seafront or Facade lasted longer after Papa Nier ruined everything by the end of the original game? There’s no way Nier’s Village lasted long with the twins dead and Papa Nier winked out of existence. Who was going to run that place? Yonah? With her fantasy cancer that never got cured? Pfft.

Anyway, Jackass is hanging out here like before. Let’s have a chat.



Name’s Jackass. Nice to meetcha. I was told to look out for a couple of weirdos looking like they were on their way to an anime convention. Yep...
......
What’s that supposed to mean?
Who are you supposed to be? Young Dante or something? I fell off on that one after like the third game.
O... K...?
Forget about it. So I hear you two are supposed to go kill all the machines out in the desert or something. That’s cool. Looks like we need to get that entrance open. Don’t let any machines in here. That’d be a real pain.
We’ll try. Err... what are you doing out here, anyway? Scouting or...



Blowing poo poo up mostly. For science.
Science?
Don’t sweat it. I already have everything I need out of you two for my study. Avoiding mackerel in the future.
Huh?
Science doesn’t care about routes.
Let’s get on with the mission.
...Right.
Well, scrap some machines for me while you’re out there. Don’t go trying to be a hero, all right?






That’s all we’ll be seeing from Jackass for now. Unfortunately, we cannot get her to skip to the part where she installs Fast Travel. That’d be too convenient.



Tune in next time as 9S and 2B make their way through the Desert Zone, have a history lesson on the region and encounter one of the top three worst sidequests in the game as NieR: Automata continues!






Video: Episode 72 Highlight Reel






Jackass Render – A lot of people seem to draw Jackass with an eyepatch. She’s just got dark hair obscuring one of her eyes. Jackass might enjoy blowing up poo poo. But she is at least safety conscious about it. Mostly... Machines caught in explosions don't count.

The Dark Id fucked around with this message at 16:41 on Aug 16, 2017

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

The Dark Id posted:

encounter one of the top three worst
But you already did Speed Star, nothing could possibly be as annoying as that loving thing :confused:

YOTC
Nov 18, 2005
Damn stupid newbie

Malachite_Dragon posted:

But you already did Speed Star, nothing could possibly be as annoying as that loving thing :confused:

Oh but there is. I have a map of them and it still took me like 15 minutes in playthrough 2.

Synthbuttrange
May 6, 2007

oh jesus yeah I think I know what he's referring to. It's not Speed Star but jesus.

RatHat
Dec 31, 2007

A tiny behatted rat👒🐀!

Malachite_Dragon posted:

But you already did Speed Star, nothing could possibly be as annoying as that loving thing :confused:

That isn't even the 2nd worst quest.

Synthbuttrange
May 6, 2007

The worst is always doing the Jean Paul quest before you find out fast travel exists.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Synthbuttrange posted:

The worst is always doing the Jean Paul quest before you find out fast travel exists.

I did the Jean Paul bit before unlocking Fast Travel and only found it tedious, not rage-inducing. Jean Paul's quest doesn't reset and force you to start all over again if you're not fast enough delivering the letters/replies.

Poltergrift
Feb 16, 2014



"When I grow up, I'm gonna be a proper swordsman. One with clothes."
My Speed Star story:

I died mid-race due to falling damage followed immediately by a kamikaze boy (I was using a setup with a lot of speed chips and very little health, so sue me). Upon death, I respawned at the Bunker... where the game attempted to reinitiate the third Speed Star challenge. As I was in an entirely separate environment, instead of placing 9S at the starting line, it deposited him in midair somewhere in the space skybox, where he fell for a while before being loaded back in that exact same starting position while the race was going on -- a race which, featuring no machine lifeform to race against, would never conclude. I sat there listening to the race music and plummeting repeatedly for a full ten minutes before I realized the race wasn't going to end and I wasn't going to be able to pause or reload my save.

Thanks, Speed Star!

Kassad
Nov 12, 2005

It's about time.

Poltergrift posted:

 I sat there listening to the race music and plummeting repeatedly for a full ten minutes before I realized the race wasn't going to end and I wasn't going to be able to pause or reload my save.

Thanks, Speed Star!

We are perpetually trapped... in a never-ending spiral of life and death. Is this a curse? Or some kind of punishment? I often think about the god who blessed us with this cryptic puzzle... and wonder if we’ll ever have the chance to kill him.

apocalypticCritic
Mar 19, 2014

Kassad posted:

We are perpetually trapped... in a never-ending spiral of life and death. Is this a curse? Or some kind of punishment? I often think about the god who blessed us with this cryptic puzzle... and wonder if we’ll ever have the chance to kill him.

NO, BECAUSE HE loving KILLS HIMSELF THE COWARDLY CUUUUUUU-DICKHEAD.

InequalityGodzilla
May 31, 2012

Req.Martyr posted:

Platinum mainline titles are universally good. Viewtiful Joe, MGR, W100, Bayonetta 1&2, N:A.
Their uh, licensed works not so much. Transformers. Legend of Korra. So on. Parts of them hold up but the spirit isn't there.
Legend of Korra was pretty okay and it only cost like $20 so :shrug:

The main thing I remember about it was how out there the final boss was for a game based on a kids show. Old man with a deformed, conjoined twin bound to his back. Like, little atrophied limbs and everything

Kuroyama posted:

Collaborate to establish base details of a setting, then let each one take the lead on a game in that setting.
Yesssss

AdmiralViscen
Nov 2, 2011

ZiegeDame posted:

Yoko Taro makes video games that are very good as video games, which use the interactive medium to get across ideas and feelings that would not work in other formats.

Hideo Kojima makes really long movies with some gameplay in between.

Someone never played MGS2

Pigbuster
Sep 12, 2010

Fun Shoe
http://rologeass.tumblr.com/post/163732345136/yoko-taros-game-design-draft-gun-soccer-gun

Yoko Taro’s Game Design Draft - “GUN SOCCER” posted:

GUN SOCCER is one of Yoko Taro’s draft on game designing. He released it to demonstrate how to make a game design line-out and presentation slides. Even though it looks like a joke, this game draft is also a part of Yoko Taro’s Drakengard and NieR world.

The event took place on 2024, filling the gap between Drakengard and NieR’s Old World Information. After the White Chlorination Syndrome spreads on 2004, a series of disease has been discovered endangering human. Creatures called Legion started to appear and try to wipe out the humanity. The battle of Legion and Human occurred for years. And on 2023, the world falls into a financial crisis because of the war and Project Gestalt.

By 2024, conflicts between ethnic and countries start to took place. The United Nations, which look at the situation seriously, proposed a method to resolves conflicts. GUN SOCCER is a survival sport competition combining the concept of Soccer and Gun Shooter (FPS). The proposal carried on by UN, and many countries started to participate.

Who will survive on this deadly game? What is the UN’s real intention of creating this game? Will this game eventually helps UN on saving the humanity?

Check out more info of the game on the provided Game Design Presentation Slides.

Presented By Yoko Taro on his 2013 workshop





The Saddest Rhino
Apr 29, 2009

Put it all together.
Solve the world.
One conversation at a time.



i need this game

Elkyrie
Mar 18, 2014
For the person who was asking a page ago where you can buy the 9S statue, I'd go here:
https://hlj.com/product/enx23427
Alternatively you can buy at amiami:
http://www.amiami.com/top/detail/detail?scode=FIGURE-032509

HLJ lets you store your purchase for up to 60 days if you choose "Private warehouse" at checkout, plus no paying upfront on either site. Just be sure you want it since neither really let you cancel pre-orders.

Pre-orders will probably close relatively soon since it's already releasing in October.


haha what :)

InequalityGodzilla
May 31, 2012

I suspect that's a stealthy attempt to get Americans to care about soccer...

pulsor93
Mar 3, 2015
Two things:
I don't know what this "Treasure" game you guys are talking about it.
GunSoccer sounds amazing and like the first sports game I'd actually play.

MagusDraco
Nov 11, 2011

even speedwagon was trolled

pulsor93 posted:

Two things:
I don't know what this "Treasure" game you guys are talking about it.
GunSoccer sounds amazing and like the first sports game I'd actually play.

Treasure was a Sega genesis (and later on N64 and Gamecube) developer. They made Gunstar Heroes, Dynamite Heady, Mischief Makers, Sin and Punishment, and Radiant Silvergun.

Probably some other stuff too like Ikaruga.

Zomborgon
Feb 19, 2014

I don't even want to see what happens if you gain CHIM outside of a pre-coded system.

InequalityGodzilla posted:

I suspect that's a stealthy attempt to get Americans to care about soccer...

It's especially weird to see it referred to as "soccer" from someone outside the USA.

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK
Sep 11, 2008

Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola

-Cheap Trick

Nap Ghost

Malachite_Dragon posted:

But you already did Speed Star, nothing could possibly be as annoying as that loving thing :confused:

In the words of Space Balls "We ain't found jack poo poo"

KamikazePotato
Jun 28, 2010

Elkyrie posted:

For the person who was asking a page ago where you can buy the 9S statue, I'd go here:
https://hlj.com/product/enx23427
Alternatively you can buy at amiami:
http://www.amiami.com/top/detail/detail?scode=FIGURE-032509

Thanks a ton, I didn't really know where to look on the internet for stuff like this so it was a big help.


So Gun Soccer is canon, right? Might as well be.

Cthulhuchan
Nov 10, 2005

Rose: Sip martini thoughtfully.

Such as this one.

Just a tiny sip couldn't hurt...

Zomborgon posted:

It's especially weird to see it referred to as "soccer" from someone outside the USA.

Sounds better than Gun Football.

Saagonsa
Dec 29, 2012

Zomborgon posted:

It's especially weird to see it referred to as "soccer" from someone outside the USA.

It's often called soccer in Japan, as well.

Hyper Crab Tank
Feb 10, 2014

The 16-bit retro-future of crustacean-based transportation

Zomborgon posted:

It's especially weird to see it referred to as "soccer" from someone outside the USA.

It's サッカー (sakkaa) in Japanese, so it's pretty much the standard word over there.

Zomborgon
Feb 19, 2014

I don't even want to see what happens if you gain CHIM outside of a pre-coded system.

Hyper Crab Tank posted:

It's サッカー (sakkaa) in Japanese, so it's pretty much the standard word over there.

Huh, neat.

Josuke Higashikata
Mar 7, 2013


I'd probably assume that most things that are English loan words or ideas in Japan tend to learn towards American English language largely because of how Japanese culture changed greatly after America's "occupation" of it after World War 2.

A lot of the post war rebuilding, the Japanese constitution etc are all American by design.

Josuke Higashikata fucked around with this message at 19:22 on Aug 15, 2017

AndwhatIseeisme
Mar 30, 2010

Being alive is pretty much a constant stream of embarrassment.
Fun Shoe
I wish I had known about hacking and route B before taking on those Golden boys as 2B. That was a long diversion.

Not as long as as funding the scientist on route A though...

Or father Servo on route A...

Or all those quests I did before fast travel unlocked...

I love Yoko Taro for making the one game I cared enough about the story for that I completely avoided spoilers turn out to be the game that punishes the player for avoiding spoilers.

Crasical
Apr 22, 2014

GG!*
*GET GOOD
Son of a bitch, you can hack the golden boys?

I tried to hack the gold stubby and saw it wasn't doing much and concluded that they were still immune and taking pathetic chip damage from hacking too, and I still hadn't found the thing that would let me kill them.

Lord_Magmar
Feb 24, 2015

"Welcome to pound town, Slifer slacker!"


I personally remember only hacking the Gold Stubby and the explosion killing the Goliaths for me. Which was pretty funny.

Edvarius
Aug 23, 2013

InequalityGodzilla posted:

Legend of Korra was pretty okay and it only cost like $20 so :shrug:

Maybe the Platinum action game was. I was an idiot and decided to get the tactics RPG version instead. The complete lack of effort was apparent in every single aspect of that thing. Although Tenzin flying in on his bison being represented by a still image pasted over the background bobbing about drunkenly was almost funny in how horrible it was.

Zagglezig
Oct 16, 2012
Well, whatever else happens to the world in this go-round, at least Jackass won't have invented the super drug for androids.


The Dark Id posted:

The Courageous Brother drat us before exploding

We have commemorate the next lunar colony beer pong session

To the immediate east past the Resistance outpost, there’s cliffside path leading

This might be the only place where...cosplayer hang out

There are tons of files containing all sorts of random world building bullshit 9S can unlocked

Should be "damns", "commemorated", and "cosplayers"

ZiegeDame
Aug 21, 2005

YUKIMURAAAA!

Zagglezig posted:

Well, whatever else happens to the world in this go-round, at least Jackass won't have invented the super drug for androids.

The Dark Id posted:

Science doesn’t care about routes.

Qrr
Aug 14, 2015


Crasical posted:

Son of a bitch, you can hack the golden boys?

I tried to hack the gold stubby and saw it wasn't doing much and concluded that they were still immune and taking pathetic chip damage from hacking too, and I still hadn't found the thing that would let me kill them.

It takes a long time to hack them, but it's absolutely the best way to kill them.

InequalityGodzilla
May 31, 2012

Edvarius posted:

Maybe the Platinum action game was. I was an idiot and decided to get the tactics RPG version instead. The complete lack of effort was apparent in every single aspect of that thing. Although Tenzin flying in on his bison being represented by a still image pasted over the background bobbing about drunkenly was almost funny in how horrible it was.

:stare: I hadn't even heard of that until now. Looking it up, that looks godawful. Yeah, the platinum game wasn't amazing by any means, but it was a basically a more simplified version of revengence's gameplay, minus the blade mode. And they got the original studio to animate some of the cutscenes so those looked pretty decent. Like I said, I paid $20 for it and I'd say I got my money's worth, if nothing more.

Edit: Come to think of it, the game also had a pro-bending mini game that I remember being really fun. Like, more fun than most of the rest of the game.

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Synthbuttrange
May 6, 2007

\Yoko taro's undertale endorsement

https://twitter.com/tobyfox/status/897508003917819904

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