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  • Locked thread
Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012

Eater of worlds, pins, and CHICKEN


It's springtime for Jarrettô! Things that happened in March:

Let's just start with the obvious. Things became even pettier in Impact as the relationship with the Hardys died. Upper management claimed to control the entirety of the Brokenô gimmick, pursued lawsuits to prevent the team from using the gimmick on ROH and WWE, and successfully got ROH's PPV dropped from Dish the night of airing live over the matter. The bridge with the Hardys has almost certainly been burned at this point. BUT THAT'S OKAY BECAUSE

Tapings happened! And new people showed up! Including:
Bruce Pritchard
Reno Scum
Garza Jr
Laredo Kid
Kevin Matthews
Fallah Bahh
Mario Bokara
Kongo Kong
Alberto Del Rio
Dutch Mantel
Rachael Ellering

And we had returns! Suicide, Karen Jarrett, Magnus, Matt Morgan, ODB, and LAX (Homicide, Konnan, and new people: Diamante and the indy team EYFBO)! We even have the return of live events promoter Rafael Morffi, which likely means Empty House Shows are coming back!

Partnerships! Pro Wrestling NOAH, The Crash, and AAA all have working alliances with the company that desperately wants you to call it Impact now. Unfortunately they had (and likely still have) no idea AAA and The Crash hate each other. Oh well!
Also they're bringing back World of Sport! And Magnus is going to be on the roster!

And the biggest addition of all, of course, was
But of course, not all changes are positive.
In addition to the Hardys, Jade and Drew Galloway fled the company.
And yet another of the already weak teams broke up (DCC). How will this affect Bram's 47 contracts? More importantly, it means half of this image changed within a week:

In addition to the pettiness with the Hardys, pettiness with old management was blatant behind the scenes and even moreso on camera:

PWInsider posted:

As we discussed yesterday during the NXT & Beyond audio show in the Elite section of PWInsider.com, there will be some segments on tonight's Impact that knocks the previous regime. While there were a number of wrestlers backstage who felt it was a shot at the roster as much as previous members of management, Eli Drake became upset and confronted Jeff Jarrett about it and the two had a discussion. It was never described to me as getting ugly but Drake voiced some frustrations the existing roster was having with the changeover last week. There were talents who felt the shots at the previous regime were unfair because they didn't see them as a shot at management, but as everyone who had been working there. Since they had been perservering long before Anthem purchased the company, despite not knowing if and when it would fall apart and whether they would get the money they were owed - a number of talents felt there was nothing wrong with their work (and certainly, the product didn't suck) but the message the segments sent ruffled some feathers. So, Drake went right to Jarrett and voiced that. We are told he spoke with both Jarrett and Bruce Prichard.

The shots (which will be seen in at least two segments tonight) were meant to be specifically aimed at former members of management (read: Dixie Carter) with the idea of distancing the company going forward without an official reboot. More than one person described it as "awkward" since John Gaburick was heavily involved in creative and now was working backstage as his era was being kicked in the face verbally and there was some sympathy for him, even among talents who would usually dismiss him privately to me. With Jeff Jarrett laying out that it as his way (taking on an old school promoter approach) when it came to the new vision of the company, it was a culture shock to the talents that had been there under Gaburick as he was open enough, when laying out directives, to take feedback and let talents try to tweak it a litttle. I do believe there was a disconnect between the Impact roster and the new GFW talents coming in (and that was felt backstage) but over the course of the tapings, there were talents who opened up the eyes of the new management as to what their potential was. It's a weird situation in that a lot of talents that already had track records there were pretty much having to prove themselves again for the new bosses, even if that wasn't stated as such openly.
#MIGA
The pettiness re:Hardys escalated to the point this comedy occurred:
https://twitter.com/willh94/status/844722618611744769

Luigi Thirty posted:

OH MY GOD TNA IS THE STUPIDEST WORST COMPANY ON THE PLANET

https://twitter.com/SoDuTw/status/844775814512074753

WE WERE DEPRIVED OF THE BUCKS AND THE HARDYS AT THE HARDY COMPOUND
And, of course, because time is a flat circle, guess who the gently caress is very likely back
https://twitter.com/prowrestlingnet...484100465983491
A whooooooole lot of dumb Russo poo poo happened at the tapings, including with the World title bouncing between Lashley, Del Rio, and Lashley again all in one taping.

Current champions:
World - Lashley
Grand - Moose
X Division - Trevor Lee
Knockouts - Rosemary
Tag team - LAX

Benne posted:

I guess I shouldn't be surprised, but I'm kind of surprised. This was probably the company's last chance to get a legitimate fresh start, scrub away bad memories, and actually move forward as a real grown-up wrestling promotion.

Instead they bring back all the old hacks who tanked the company the last time, rehash the same tired "we're not WWE" talking points that just remind people how low-rent they really are, do a loving announcer feud that buries the actual in-ring wrestling, and put the belt on a WWE washout in literally his first night. Jesus take the wheel.

grack posted:

TNA is really good at being terrible at everything.

https://twitter.com/RebyHardy/status/840315276608565248

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DoctorGonzo
Jul 25, 2016

help theres rain coming from the sky and theres other racers on the track near me and slamming my brakes on breaks them ironically enough and why does my avatar keep getting worse



Ain't Impact(TM) Great

No.

Jason Sextro
Jul 30, 2003

Un alpha en développement depuis quatre ans? C'est incroyable!



Russo being back again is the most TNA thing ever

Jarrett really is attached to the one guy who pushed him as a main-eventer

Martian Buddy
Jun 4, 2010

Are you ready to swear
right here,
right now,
before the devil


Jason Sextro posted:

Russo being back again is the most TNA thing ever

Jarrett really is attached to the one guy who pushed him as a main-eventer

How long until they get booked as co-TNA champs.

grack
Jan 10, 2012

COACH TOTORO SAY REFEREE CAN BANISH WHISTLE TO LAND OF WIND AND GHOSTS!


Hey hey hey, TNA rehired Dutch Mantel as well, probably so they have someone to blame when the "Fire Russo!" chants start.

Jason Sextro
Jul 30, 2003

Un alpha en développement depuis quatre ans? C'est incroyable!



grack posted:

Hey hey hey, TNA rehired Dutch Mantel as well, probably so they have someone to blame when the "Fire Russo!" chants start.

I can't wait until they contact Jim Cornette too

CubsWoo
Aug 17, 2005

Where the big boys RAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGH FUCK YOU


The best part of TNA is getting pallets of their unsold merchandise for next to nothing thanks to Don West

Cardboard Box
Jul 14, 2009



i haven't watched impact in years but boy it sure sounds like the new regime is a lot like the old regime that ran it into the ground originally

grack
Jan 10, 2012

COACH TOTORO SAY REFEREE CAN BANISH WHISTLE TO LAND OF WIND AND GHOSTS!


Cardboard Box posted:

i haven't watched impact in years but boy it sure sounds like the new regime is a lot like the old regime that ran it into the ground originally

It pretty much is the old regime, just now with more Nazis.

a.lo
Sep 11, 2009



Last time I saw TNA was the tito ortiz reveal. Everyone is still with the company last I remembered at least

Molestationary Store
May 21, 2007


He's the worst singer!
He's the worst entertainer!
He's the worst wrestler!
He's the worst promoter!
He's double J!
J E double F, J A double R E double T!
Ain't he great?!
gently caress no, he loving isn't!

Mercury Crusader
Apr 20, 2005

Nice to meet ya, hee ho!



Don't forget that you can go to http://pluto.tv/watch/pro-wrestling to watch TNA 24 hours a day on a random schedule highlighting all the talent they've lost over the years!



It's like I'm actually watching the TV Guide Channel!

Bigass Moth
Mar 6, 2004

I joined the #RXT REVOLUTION.

he knows...


Every rinky dink Indy in the world has a show in Orlando this week. TNA does not.

rovert
Jun 10, 2013


https://twitter.com/MATTHARDYBRAND/...213756823973888

MassRafTer
May 26, 2001

Fundamentals as sound as the WNBA

grack posted:

It pretty much is the old regime, just now with more Nazis.

There's no Nazis. The only Nazis work closely with WWE.

ZDar Fan
Oct 15, 2012


I just learned about Pluto TV, so I've been leaving Impact on while I do chores and such. How is the Jeremy Borash/Josh Matthews feud even worse than it sounds on paper? I can't imagine viewers having any reaction to this beyond "good god, shut up."

Also, EC3 just said that he carried this company on his "perfectly symmetrical back"

ZDar Fan fucked around with this message at Apr 1, 2017 around 19:11

ChrisBTY
Mar 29, 2012


MassRafTer posted:

There's no Nazis. The only Nazis work closely with WWE.

Are the Harris Brothers not involved in this shitshow?

grack
Jan 10, 2012

COACH TOTORO SAY REFEREE CAN BANISH WHISTLE TO LAND OF WIND AND GHOSTS!


ChrisBTY posted:

Are the Harris Brothers not involved in this shitshow?

Anthem put them in charge, so yeah.

MassRafTer
May 26, 2001

Fundamentals as sound as the WNBA

ChrisBTY posted:

Are the Harris Brothers not involved in this shitshow?

They haven't been and supposedly TNA isn't using Aeroluxe for production which is interesting.

grack posted:

Anthem put them in charge, so yeah.

No they didn't, Jarrett is in charge. He's stealing catch phrases from Nazis.

MassRafTer fucked around with this message at Apr 1, 2017 around 20:18

Testekill
Nov 1, 2012

no get out of here trix rabbit



ZDar Fan posted:

I just learned about Pluto TV, so I've been leaving Impact on while I do chores and such. How is the Jeremy Borash/Josh Matthews feud even worse than it sounds on paper? I can't imagine viewers having any reaction to this beyond "good god, shut up."

Also, EC3 just said that he carried this company on his "perfectly symmetrical back"

WrasslorMonkey
Mar 5, 2012

...And how appropriate, that the gif you grovel for is your very own. A victim of your own greed, wallowing in the muck of avarice...



Oh hey I never noticed that before. How do you even do that?

RZApublican
Nov 6, 2007

I'm an alien.


WrasslorMonkey posted:

Oh hey I never noticed that before. How do you even do that?

A shitload of steroids

MassRafTer
May 26, 2001

Fundamentals as sound as the WNBA

WrasslorMonkey posted:

Oh hey I never noticed that before. How do you even do that?

You made a bacne lion in the middle there.

Testekill
Nov 1, 2012

no get out of here trix rabbit



WrasslorMonkey posted:

Oh hey I never noticed that before. How do you even do that?

An absolute asston of Steroids. There was this guy called Dan Matha last year who showed up in NXT and he was almost as bad. You'd think these guys would pop if they took a back bump

bbchops
Jul 26, 2001

Ho ho ho! I'll have the same again!

WrasslorMonkey posted:

Oh hey I never noticed that before. How do you even do that?

Unnerving.

Cardboard Box
Jul 14, 2009



edit: nvm i just noticed wrasslormonkey edited it lmao

Cardboard Box fucked around with this message at Apr 2, 2017 around 11:33

Venomous
Nov 7, 2011



That back is more shameful than Roman's

Grendels Dad
Mar 5, 2011

Popular culture has passed you by.

MassRafTer posted:

There's no Nazis. The only Nazis work closely with WWE.

Checks out, over at WWE the checks arrive on time.

Discount Trombones
Jan 22, 2014




Checks out.

rovert
Jun 10, 2013


https://twitter.com/TNADixie/status/848747633774665728

Cardboard Box
Jul 14, 2009



is she trying to get in good with wwe now that she's not involved with tna lmao

HOTLANTA MAN
Jul 4, 2010

Justice has prevailed.


Lipstick Apathy

i bet vince legit does not know who Dixie Carter is

sportsgenius86
Jun 17, 2008

THE STREAK IS OVER


I took it as her taking a shot at new TNA management

SamuraiFoochs
Jan 16, 2007



Grimey Drawer

sportsgenius86 posted:

I took it as her taking a shot at new TNA management

Ditto in which case it's one of the best things she has ever done.

Fat Lowtax
Nov 9, 2008


"I'm willing to pay up to $1200 for a big anime titty"




For a while I've had it in the back of my head as a fantasy booking thing that Dixie managing heel AJ in WWE would be incredible if it could happen somehow

Cardboard Box
Jul 14, 2009



sportsgenius86 posted:

I took it as her taking a shot at new TNA management

yeah that makes more sense

rare Magic card l00k
Jan 3, 2011

Me uni a la Revolucion #RXT


el sabe ...


https://twitter.com/RealJeffJarrett...703218502836224

Definitely not bitter.

rovert
Jun 10, 2013


https://twitter.com/badboicasey/sta...885486055825410

DoctorGonzo
Jul 25, 2016

help theres rain coming from the sky and theres other racers on the track near me and slamming my brakes on breaks them ironically enough and why does my avatar keep getting worse




Thats not surprising. Karen Jarrett is a conservative woman who hosed her way to the top.

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Jason Sextro
Jul 30, 2003

Un alpha en développement depuis quatre ans? C'est incroyable!



HOTLANTA MAN posted:

i bet vince legit does not know who Dixie Carter is

that can only help her get in good with wwe, really

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