Search Amazon.com:
Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us $3,400 per month for bandwidth bills alone, and since we don't believe in shoving popup ads to our registered users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
  • Post
  • Reply
Stiev Awt
Mar 20, 2007





Welcome to the 16-17 Mike Milbury Golden Shoe Awards, in honour of the one man in hockey who certifiably bad at everything. Playing, coaching, the works. TV talking, managing, the works. Here, we vote on the dumb and bad players, coaches, and people in general for being terrible.

Awards

The Doug Wickenheiser Award



Awarded to the player in their first year who had a really bad and/or disappointing season.

2015 Winner: Leon Draisaitl
2016 Winner: Darnell Nurse

The Wayne Gretzky Award



Awarded to the coach who's strategy and roster management makes an atom coach look like Pat Burns.

2015 Winner: Randy Carlyle
2016 Winner: Patrick Roy

The Adam Oates Award of Knowing Goaltending



For the goalie so bad, that he's barely a step above a shooter tutor.

2015 Winner: Kari Lehtonen
2016 Winner: Kari Lehtonen

The Sergei Kostitsyn Abandonne Award



Vote for the bad forwards that can't skate, shoot, check, take stupid penalties, and just do dumb poo poo in general.

2015 Winner: Tie between Phil Kessel and Tyler Bozak
2016 Winner: Mikkel Boedker

The Rory Fitzpatrick All Star Defence Award



Some defencemen are slow; some are caught out of position a lot; some can't pinch or maintain a play at the point. The biggest offenders go here.

2015 Winner: Luca Sbisa
2016 Winner: Dan Girardi

The Dale Hunter Award of General Niceness



The NHL is ripe with cheapshotting, goalie running pieces of poo poo. This is where you vote for the biggest rear end in a top hat.

2015 Winner: Slava Voynov
2016 Winner: Patrick Kane

The Jim Benning Award



Bestowed to the General Manager who is the biggest detriment to his team with his overly generous trades, overpriced free agent signings, villainizing of key players, or all of the above.

2015 Winner: Don Sweeney
2016 Winner: Jim Benning (unanimous decision)

The Quebec Nordiques are Proud to Select Eric Lindros Award



The Least Valuable Player trophy, given to the player who's the biggest detriment to his team, or to the generally worst player in the league. The Hart has two different meanings, and so does this one. Pick one and roll with it.

2015 Winner: Luca Sbisa
2016: Winner: Dan Girardi


The Steve Simmons Memorial Award for Word Vomit



Once upon a time, sports journalists used to report facts on teams and players without need for dramatics, or outright lies. Nor did they have the audacity to show their horrible faces and shrill voices on TV. That era is dead and rotting in a ditch. Vote for the worst offender of the year.

2016 Winner: Steve Simmons

The Marcel Aubut Platinum Suitacse Award



NHL owners have always been a pit of vipers that would sell your family to ISIS if the price was right. They threaten to move if they don't get a free stadium. They shut the league down every 10 years in an effort to kneecap the players union. The most repugnant of them this year needs to be outed so we can shame them. Shame!

2016 Winner: Eugene Melnyk


A NEW SPECIAL POST SCF AWARD?! YES

The Kerry Fraser Hairpiece Award



Bad reffing is one of the three bedrocks of the NHL, alongside "Everyone dives" and "Everyone traps". Vote for the greatest keeper of the tradition here.

Stiev Awt fucked around with this message at Jun 14, 2017 around 18:03

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Stiev Awt
Mar 20, 2007



Rules

1) To participate, fill out the following ballot and send me a PM, or email it to SASgoldenshoe@gmail.com with your SA name in the subject line.

2) The points are weighted 5 for 1st, 3 for 2nd, and 1 for 3rd for all categories.

3) Discussing your picks is welcome and encouraged.

4) Voting is open until the end of the NHL Entry Draft on June 24, 2017. 8 PM MDT on July 1.

5) If you want to make a change to your ballot, send me an email with the changes you wish to make.

code:
The Doug Wickenheiser Award
1. 
2. 
3. 

The Wayne Gretzky Award 
1. 
2. 
3. 

The Adam Oates Award of Knowing Goaltending
1. 
2. 
3. 

The Sergei Kostitsyn Abandonne Award
1. 
2. 
3. 

The Rory Fitzpatrick All Star Defence Award
1. 
2. 
3. 

The Dale Hunter Award of General Niceness
1. 
2. 
3. 

The Jim Benning Award
1. 
2. 
3. 

The Quebec Nordiques are Proud to Select Eric Lindros Award
1. 
2. 
3. 

The Steve Simmons Memorial Award for Word Vomit
1. 
2. 
3. 


The Marcel Aubut Platinum Suitacse Award
1. 
2. 
3. 

The Kerry Fraser Hairpiece Award
1.
2.
3.

Stiev Awt fucked around with this message at Jun 25, 2017 around 01:33

iospace
Apr 20, 2020




Grimey Drawer

Is Joe Sakic eligible for both the "The Quebec Nordiques are Proud to Select Eric Lindros Award" and "Jim Benning Award"?

Stiev Awt
Mar 20, 2007



The TQNaPtSEL hasn't been bestowed on a retired player with a GM job before. I'd hesitate to say yes, but let's see how the ballots turn out.

JawKnee
Mar 24, 2007

It's the arrogance of the subtext: The province of human affairs is a field best left to dilettantes' extraordinary gift for the feigning of paralysis. For saying nothing at all. For daydreams of black-tie affairs at Rideau Hall. An acceptance speech. Sustained applause.

nice. I think I may take it easy on Luca this year and vote for Eric Gudbranson

JoelJoel
Nov 4, 2011



At what point do we just name it the Kari award?

iospace
Apr 20, 2020




Grimey Drawer

JoelJoel posted:

At what point do we just name it the Kari award?

The same time the "Jay Feaster is Fat" award gets renamed after Kessel.

Shinjobi
Jul 10, 2008



Gravy Boat 2k

JoelJoel posted:

At what point do we just name it the Kari award?

I mean, Niemi is the stronger contender between the two this season.

Aphrodite
Jun 27, 2006



Auston Matthews for The Doug. Didn't even win a scoring title, sad.

HootTheOwl
May 13, 2012


Jerco for the proud selection award because holy gently caress does this guy do anything? He doesn't even fail in spectacular ways so I can blame losses on him.

Infidel Castro
Jun 8, 2010

HELLO MY BABY
HELLO MY HONEY
HELLO MY PERNELL-KARL
♪ ♩ ♪ ♩ ♩





Dammit, if Andrew MacDonald doesn't win the Rory Fitzpatrick this year, I don't know what more he has to do.

Furnaceface
Oct 21, 2004

I had a beer with Stephen Harper once and now I like him.


Infidel Castro posted:

Dammit, if Andrew MacDonald doesn't win the Rory Fitzpatrick this year, I don't know what more he has to do.

Be worse than Dan Girardi or Alexei Emelin.

Hirez
Feb 3, 2003

Weber scored 49 points?



Boro is worse

deoju
Jul 11, 2004

All the pieces matter.


Nominating this play for the Dale Hunter...

Pornographic Memory posted:

in case anybody's wondering what the fuss with calvert's about :

https://twitter.com/EvgeniMaIkinEgo...060552666566656

Stiev Awt
Mar 20, 2007



Joe Sakic jumps out to an early lead.

Yaya
Nov 14, 2012

Preparing for Submarine-like standings


Brandon Sutter and Jayson Megna should honest to god be 1 & 2 in the Sergei Kostitsyn and Eric Lindros rewards respectively.

I have never seen any two players contribute so little with so much ice time.

On a related note Willie Desjardins is up there in the Gretzky award, too. There's no beating Capuano, but he was terrible.

Teemu Pokemon
Jun 19, 2004

To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause


If you don't vote for Sheahan, Ericsson, Holland, and Abdelkader for the Kostitsyn, Fitzpatrick, Benning, and Lindros, kindly get the gently caress out of my face


Yaya posted:

Brandon Sutter and Jayson Megna should honest to god be 1 & 2 in the Sergei Kostitsyn and Eric Lindros rewards respectively.

I have never seen any two players contribute so little with so much ice time.

Justin Abdelkader's TOI and contract would like a word



e: I also voted Willie as worst coach and didn't have Cappy on my ballot. He got fired, that DQ'd him in my eyes, there's something special about guys like Willie and Hakstol who are bad and still get to run out the card

Teemu Pokemon fucked around with this message at Apr 15, 2017 around 12:32

Mike_V
Jul 31, 2004

Let's* go Blackhawks! The Blues and Red Wings suck.

Yaya posted:

Brandon Sutter and Jayson Megna should honest to god be 1 & 2 in the Sergei Kostitsyn and Eric Lindros rewards respectively.

I have never seen any two players contribute so little with so much ice time.

On a related note Willie Desjardins is up there in the Gretzky award, too. There's no beating Capuano, but he was terrible.

Jori Lehtera should really be ahead of both of them if you look at his contract and who his normal linemates were for most of the season.

Yaya
Nov 14, 2012

Preparing for Submarine-like standings


Mike_V posted:

Jori Lehtera should really be ahead of both of them if you look at his contract and who his normal linemates were for most of the season.

I mean, Jayson Megna was with the Sedin Twins and Brandon Sutter also has a terrible contract and was with the Sedins on the Power Play for the entire season.

iospace
Apr 20, 2020




Grimey Drawer

... I know it's a bit late, but how come we don't have a "Tim Peel Award for Refereeing Excellence" yet?

Stiev Awt
Mar 20, 2007



https://twitter.com/NicholsOnHockey...009971804557312

Infidel Castro
Jun 8, 2010

HELLO MY BABY
HELLO MY HONEY
HELLO MY PERNELL-KARL
♪ ♩ ♪ ♩ ♩





iospace posted:

... I know it's a bit late, but how come we don't have a "Tim Peel Award for Refereeing Excellence" yet?

It would look bad having Tim Peel win an award named after himself every year.

Stiev Awt
Mar 20, 2007



Just one year after Dan Girardi won the Rory Fitzpatrick, his contract is bought out. Get your ballots in now and predict the next off season buyout.

iospace
Apr 20, 2020




Grimey Drawer

Infidel Castro posted:

It would look bad having Tim Peel win an award named after himself every year.

After that SCF... I don't know.

Stiev Awt
Mar 20, 2007



iospace posted:

After that SCF... I don't know.

Hmmm good point.


SPECIAL AWARD INCOMING

The Kerry Fraser Hairpiece Award



Bad reffing is one of the three bedrocks of the NHL, alongside "Everyone dives" and "Everyone traps". Vote for the greatest keeper of the tradition.

ilmucche
Mar 16, 2016


Rosie loving dimanno is worse than Steve simmonds

El Gallinero Gros
Mar 17, 2010


I'm actually having trouble thinking of lovely rookies. The crop was so good that perfectly decent rooks won't even sniff a nomination for the Calder, even though they'd have been nominated or would have flat out won in a slow year.


I think Cam Ward is a good nom for the goalie award though, jeez. Wasn't he the one somebody on his own team barked "Make some fuckin' saves" at in the lockeroom? Or was that Eddie Lack?

El Gallinero Gros fucked around with this message at Jun 18, 2017 around 05:41

Zamboni_Rodeo
Jul 19, 2007

NEVER play "Lady of Spain" AGAIN!

El Gallinero Gros posted:

II think Cam Ward is a good nom for the goalie award though, jeez. Wasn't he the one somebody on his own team barked "Make some fuckin' saves" at in the lockeroom? Or was that Eddie Lack?

As a long-suffering Canes fan, I'd say either of them was a good candidate.

But we've got Scott Darling now, so yay, I guess?

El Gallinero Gros
Mar 17, 2010


Zamboni_Rodeo posted:

As a long-suffering Canes fan, I'd say either of them was a good candidate.

But we've got Scott Darling now, so yay, I guess?

If you can unload Ward or Lack I think they'll be alright. I think the 'Canes have some promise right now. I think they also need another goalscorer, but there's some UFA's who can create offence.

El Gallinero Gros fucked around with this message at Jun 20, 2017 around 16:22

Stiev Awt
Mar 20, 2007



George McPhee is at it again.

Stiev Awt
Mar 20, 2007



Just want to let you all know that I'm waiting on some commissions for the presentation to come through, so I'm extending voting until July 1st, 8 PM mountain time.

Teemu Pokemon
Jun 19, 2004

To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause


So anybody else vote Ken Holland for worst GM or just me

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Kilza
Oct 3, 2013



Ken Holland wasn't even in my top 3. Turns out there's a lot of bad GMs to choose from.

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply