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Professor Shark
May 22, 2012




I watched the first episode when it came out and quit, it is the worst show to ever be on tv

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PassTheRemote
Mar 15, 2007

Number 6 holds The Village record in Duck Hunt.

The first one to kill wins.

It's weird now that I think about it, Lex Luthor and Johnny Football's relationship is really similar to Mel and Doug's relationship in Flight of the Conchords. The execution counts for a lot, cause while I do find the latter's relationship funny on that show, the former I was where I turned the show off.

You Are A Elf
Apr 26, 2010

Black Gold!


As Nero Danced posted:

If I had to choose, watch this again or lose a testicle, it would take a bit to decide.

Goodbye Lefty

It's like some hosed up Saw movie.


Jigsaw: "I want to play a game. In front of you is a TV with all 7 episodes of Allen Gregory on it. All you have to do..."

Victim: *cuts dick and balls off with rusty keyhole saw*

Jigsaw: "But you didn't even listen to the game rules."

Victim: "No need. I made the right... choice... *bleeds to death*"

CRINDY
Sep 23, 2010

forget about ur worries and ur strife


I watched the majority of this back when it premiered because it was such a raging tire-fire I couldn't look away. I had blissfully forgotten everything about it until this thread.

get that OUT of my face
Feb 10, 2007



The jokes about Allen Gregory wanting to gently caress the principal make no sense whatsoever. There's no rationale behind it other than "lol a 7-year-old has a thing for grannies."

I wanna say the episode I saw was the "mandatory gay prom" one, but I don't remember exactly. I posted about it in the thread (yes, it existed) so I'll have to dig through the archives.

Edit: I had the first non-OP post in that thread and I made a horrifying discovery. I've made my fair share of bad posts in my ten years of posting on SA, but this is the worst thing I've ever posted. I want to go back in time and punch my past self for making this post.



Also, there were 13 episodes of Allen Gregory produced. It was canceled to make way for the second season of Bob's Burgers and the Napoleon Dynamite cartoon, so the world (especially the OP) was spared from more unspeakable horror.

get that OUT of my face fucked around with this message at 00:59 on Apr 16, 2017

As Nero Danced
Sep 3, 2009

Alright, let's do this


You know, I read somewhere about a guy finding an envelope in an old library He almost opened it until he read the label: "smallpox scabs for doctor." It made me think about how many horrible plagues and disasters are hidden away in small corners of the world, waiting to be discovered and unleashed on the unsuspecting masses.

Smallpox, spanish flu, unopened canisters from WW1 in the French countryside, bubonic plague, explosive rear end-bleeding hemorraghic fever, the ark of the loving covenant, they all pale in comparison to the threat that there is a hard drive out there with those unreleased episodes on them.

As Nero Danced fucked around with this message at 02:31 on Apr 16, 2017

get that OUT of my face
Feb 10, 2007



Looking through the old thread: yes, I watched through the "mandatory gay prom" episode. My takeaways were "I was too bored to be offended," "not a single joke lands," and "they used a South Park-esque 'I learned a lesson today' moment to say that being gay is a choice."

If you have archives, you can watch the reactions to the episodes as they aired right here.

General Dog
Apr 26, 2008

One death is a tragedy, ten deaths is a statistic. Especially if it saves my job.



Mister Kingdom posted:

I remember watching this the first time around. I hated every single character by the end of the run. There is absolutely nothing redeemable about this loving show.

gently caress Jonah Hill in the rear end with a barb-wire dildo.

So what bet did you lose?

BioEnchanted
Aug 9, 2011

He plays for the dreamers that forgot how to dream, and the lovers that forgot how to love.

I'll admit I enjoy Jonah Hill in the stuff that I've seen (never had any interest in Superbad) where he's a side character or villain. I loved his performance as Tighten/Hal in Megamind and enjoyed him in Wolf of Wall Street as well. I have no idea what made him think that this show was a good idea in the first place.

Space Cadet Omoly
Jan 15, 2014

Yay




Allen Gregory Episode four: Not as bad as it could have been?

The episode opens on Lex Luther in a board meeting and I make a startling discovery: Lex Luther is actually kind of funny. Yeah, I know, shocking! See, it turns out everyone at the company he owns thinks he’s a pretentious idiot (because he is). He has no real power (although he THINKS he does), they just grudgingly tolerate him because they have so much respect for his father. When Lex Luther is acting like a buffoon instead of an abusive rapist he suddenly becomes a lot more fun to watch. I mean, it’s not the most original idea (If you’ve ever watched “arrested development” or “the office” you’ve seen the same style of comedy done better), but it’s tolerable. Hell, it’s almost even enjoyable! Why do I hate this show so much-

Then Allen Gregory shows up and I instantly remember. Allen is trying to forcibly befriend Joel again, it wasn’t funny the first three times and it’s not funny now. Joel’s girlfriend, who’s name I can’t remember so I’m just gonna call her Princess Peach, makes the mistake of trying to be nice to Allen Gregory even though he’s acting like an rear end in a top hat. This pisses Joel off so he starts being an rear end in a top hat to her too. Poor Princess Peach is stuck between a douche and a hard place. Joel poor chocolate milk down Allen Gregory’s pants. It looks like Princess Peach is feeling sorry for him because she’s a kind soul with bad judgment.

And then we cut back to Lex Luther at work. This part isn’t so bad, like I said it’s basically just like watching a knock off version of “Arrested Development”. Speaking of Knock offs, I think now is a good time to mention that Lex Luther looks and acts exactly like a knock off version of Jim Rash doing his Dean character from Community. In fact the first time I heard him I thought he WAS voice by Jim Rash (he’s not, he’s voiced by French Stewart). I wonder if this portrayal could count as defamation of character in court if Jim Rash sued...?

Damnit, now Allen Gregory is back on screen again. Blah blah blah Joel is out sick, Allen Gregory wants to stalk him while he’s weak and vulnerable.

Lex Luther, Johnny Football, and Asian Daria all have a scene together in which Lex Luther finds out everyone at his company thinks he’s a moron. Ya know, Allen Gregory minus Allen Gregory wouldn’t be such a bad show. It wouldn’t be a great show, but it wouldn’t be unbearable. Provided you also changed it so that Lex Luther and Johnny Football were just a normal couple instead of a rapist and a guy with Stockholm syndrome.

Allen Gregory has broken into Joel’s house. I’d feel sorry for Joel if he weren’t as big of a turd as Allen is. I hope this episode ends with them both falling into a bottomless pit forever, but I know it won’t.

Lex Luther and Johnny Football are back at the office! Jokes are happening! This subplot is pretty good! When the writers aren’t throwing in gags about sexual assault Lex Luther and Johnny Football actually have decent chemistry and comedic timing! Can we just watch this for the rest of the episode?

Nope, back to Allen Gregory. He’s taking over Joel’s life while Joel is out sick. Most of Joel’s friends are understandably creeped out by this, but for some odd reason Princess Peach finds Allen Gregory’s invasiveness charming. I guess she’s just so used to dating douchebags she can’t imagine living her life without one. Poor, poor Princess Peach.

Yay! Back to the Lex Luther Subplot! He’s just learned his whole life is a lie, and now he wants to try doing some real work for a change. I’m actually kind of interested in seeing where this is going-

Boo! Back to Allen Gregory! Allen Gregory has usurped Joel as Alpha douche in his absence, but insists that he’s only doing it for Joel’s benefit and he’s acting pretty sincere about it. Which doesn’t really make sense given his character? Like, the only reason he seems to want to befriend Joel is because Joel is popular and if he can be popular without Joel then why would he bother with Joel? Whatever, I’m over thinking this.

Princess Peach wants to break up with Joel. Good for her, except the reason she wants to dump him is because she wants to date Allen Gregory instead. Clearly she’s gone mad. Allen Gregory is actually kind of upset by this, I guess he does care about Joel in his own hosed up way.

Lex Luther fucks up royally at work and everybody hates him.

Keith David shows up to say some stuff. I think he’s like Allen Gregory’s personal trainer or something? Anyway, Keith David tells Allen Gregory to be an rear end in a top hat. For the first time ever Allen is reluctant to do so. I still have no idea why Allen cares about Joel other than “the plot says so”.

Annnnnnd here’s where the Lex Luther story-line falls apart. Instead of facing consequences for his actions it looks like he’s going to magically fix things by doing the same stupid poo poo he did to gently caress everything up. I don’t wanna see that, no one wants to see that, I want to see this pretentious gently caress suffer not succeed!

Joel’s friends all like it better when Joel isn’t around, which makes sense because Joel is awful. Still doesn’t explain why they like Allen Gregory though. Joel comes back to school and everyone just wants to ignore him, but Allen Gregory decides to use his douchiness powers for good(?) and brutally insults all of Joel’s friends. The other kids decide that the abuse Joel heaps on them is slightly more bearable than the abuse Allen Gregory is capable of dishing out so they go back being his friend. Then Allen Gregory gets chocolate milk poured down his pants again.

I guess the only time Allen Gregory is capable of being kind is when he’s helping another bully stay in power? Even if that bully being in power benefits him in no way?

But wait, Holy poo poo, I was wrong about the Lex Luther subplot! The reason he’s able to magic a solution out of his rear end is because the whole thing was a scam! They never really gave him more power, they just tricked him into thinking they did. He’s still an idiot and a gently caress up! And everyone knows he’s an idiot and a gently caress up! And the way that he looks back at the building at the end as he’s being driven away implies that on some level he also knows that he’s an idiot and a gently caress up, but he’s not going try and fight it anymore because living a lie is easier. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but that’s a pretty clever twist. Oh, and Lex Luther and Johnny Football actually have a pretty sweet moment together. Lex Luther doesn’t treat Johnny Football like total poo poo, Johnny Football is happy, it’s like I’m watching a completely different show where they really are just a regular couple.

If Lex Luther was the protagonist, and he and Johnny Football were always written the way they were in this subplot, and Asian Daria was their only child, this show probably would have gotten more than seven episodes.

But he's not, and they're not, and she's not, so it didn't.

Mister Kingdom
Dec 14, 2005

And the tears that fall
On the city wall
Will fade away
With the rays of morning light

General Dog posted:

So what bet did you lose?

No bet. It was something that was on between The Simpsons and Family Guy and I figured, what the hell. I kept watching hoping it would get better and maybe some of the characters would redeem themselves in just a tiny way.

They never did.

Even the sister eventually succumbed to the evil that was Allen.

get that OUT of my face
Feb 10, 2007



BioEnchanted posted:

I'll admit I enjoy Jonah Hill in the stuff that I've seen (never had any interest in Superbad) where he's a side character or villain. I loved his performance as Tighten/Hal in Megamind and enjoyed him in Wolf of Wall Street as well. I have no idea what made him think that this show was a good idea in the first place.
He also has a Best Supporting Actor nomination for Moneyball, so Jonah Hill is actually quite good when he's not the center of attention. Something to mention: he got said nomination a month or so after Allen Gregory got canceled and when The Sitter bombed at the box office. Remember The Sitter? Neither do I, but they were talking about it in the thread.

As Nero Danced
Sep 3, 2009

Alright, let's do this


Space Cadet Omoly posted:

Allen Gregory Episode four: Not as bad as it could have been?


This is the peak of the show, like you said the dad plot was pretty alright. Aside from one ten second clip at some point ahead, this show is going full bore for bedrock in shittiness.

NoEyedSquareGuy
Mar 16, 2009

Just because Liquor's dead, doesn't mean you can just roll this bitch all over town with "The Freedoms."


My curiosity got the best of me and I watched the first episode of this show. If anyone else is curious, don't bother.

I Am Fowl
Mar 8, 2008

nononononono


NoEyedSquareGuy posted:

My curiosity got the best of me and I watched the first episode of this show. If anyone else is curious, don't bother.

Reading this thread is like sitting in front of an electric socket with a fork in your hand.

NoEyedSquareGuy
Mar 16, 2009

Just because Liquor's dead, doesn't mean you can just roll this bitch all over town with "The Freedoms."


Mr. Fowl posted:

Reading this thread is like sitting in front of an electric socket with a fork in your hand.

It's really, really bad in a way that's impossible to enjoy even ironically. It evokes nothing more than disgust, and I hope the seventh episode ends with Allen Gregory being thrown into one of those giant industrial shredders.

get that OUT of my face
Feb 10, 2007



NoEyedSquareGuy posted:

It's really, really bad in a way that's impossible to enjoy even ironically. It evokes nothing more than disgust, and I hope the seventh episode ends with Allen Gregory being thrown into one of those giant industrial shredders.
The seventh episode is the worst one. It's the epitome of Allen Gregory getting everything he wants and not facing the consequences of being a horrible little poo poo, and it even ends with a rape joke.

Propaganda Machine
Jan 2, 2005

Truthiness!

Yeah, I thought the original thread was funny enough to attempt a hate watch, but I lasted for one episode and gave up. I love a good hate watch but it just wasn't worth it, at all.

Reading about the pain of others is still good, though.

Space Cadet Omoly
Jan 15, 2014

Yay




Sorry about not posting any episode summaries for a while. I just bought Persona 5 and it turns out that's a lot more fun than torturing myself with lovely cartoons. But I ed myself over this so I might as well get it over with before I forget. So without further ado I bring you a fine fresh turd, enjoy (although I don't see how you possibly could).

Allen Gregory Episode Five: And then things got awful again

Allen Gregory is still a worthless turd and Lex Luther is back to treating Johnny Football like garbage for no reason. I’m starting to suspect the last episodes surprisingly good Lex Luther subplot was just a momentary fluke because now I find him unbearable again. Maybe I was just extra sleep deprived when I watched it. Maybe I dreamed it.

Anyway, Allen Gregory fires the maid because he walked in on her pooping. Then he goes to school and tries to fire one of the other students because that student is Latino and Allen Gregory assumes that all Latino people are maids.



Like, I get what they’re going for. They’re trying to show that racism is awful by making an awful an awful character be racist. But couldn’t they also just, I dunno, not be racist? It takes a lot of skill and effort to make racial humor insightful instead of abhorrent, and I really don’t think the writers of this show are up to the task. At all.

The temp agency Johnny Football works for sends him to be the new maid in his own home. Why is Johnny Football working for a temp agency at all? The first episode implies that Lex Luther is having money troubles (maybe?) but never clarifies what those money troubles might be and a few other episodes imply that the company Lex Luther gets his money from is going out of business. However, last episode establishes that the company is actually doing very well. So why is Lex Luther suddenly forcing Johnny Football to get a degrading job? Is he just doing it to humiliate him because Lex Luther is a horrible person? Yeah, yeah that’s probably it.

Allen Gregory continues to be racist. His teachers tries to get him to be less racist. She does not succeed. She does, however, force him to write a 50 word essay about why what he did was wrong. This should be super easy (Hell, I’ve already written like over 300 hundred words just now about everything Allen Gregory does wrong), but there’s no doubt in my mind that Allen Gregory will find some way to gently caress this up.

Huh, turns out Lex Luther intentionally put out the ad for the maid position at the temp agency he knew Johnny Football was going to so Johnny Football would take it so they can hang out together while Johnny Football is working. But, again, why? Why do any of this? I still don’t understand what Lex Luther’s endgame is, if he wants to hang out with Johnny Football he could just ask him “Hey let’s hang out.” Since they’re dating (well, not really dating, it’s more like he’s holding Johnny Football hostage) and they don’t seem to need the money? I guess he really does just like humiliating Football Johnny.

After a talk with his idiot bio-dad Allen Gregory decides to write a racist play instead of writing (or rather, forcing Patrick to write) an anti-racism essay.
No good can come of this. No good EVER comes of this.

Asian Daria takes a minute to point out that everything that’s happening is stupid and makes no sense. No one listens, no one EVER listens.

Oh, and Asian Daria’s two friends are going to be in Allen’s stupid play because they’re worthless enablers too dumb to realize they’re supporting a sociopath. I don’t think I’ve written much about Asian Daria’s two friends, because there’s really not much to say about them. They show up in almost every episode, but I usually just zone out whenever they speak. You can tell the writers really put a lot of effort into making them as uninteresting as possible. Which is better, I guess, than the effort they put into making everyone else as awful as possible.

Lex Luther continues degrading Johnny Football. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: it isn’t funny or enjoyable. It feels like I’m watching the world’s worst softcore S&M session.

Guillermo (The Latino kid Allen Gregory “fired”) is now being forced by Allen Gregory to be in his racist play. I have no idea why Guillermo’s going along with this. Just punch the little poo poo, Guillermo, it’s not hard. This is one of the few times in life where violence isn’t just the right answer, it’s the ONLY answer. Punch him Guillermo, and don’t stop punching him until he stops moving. Only then will you be free, only then will we ALL be free.

Oh God damnit, Asian Daria is also going to be in Allen Gregory’s stupid play. He’s not even blackmailing her or anything, she’s just going along with it because she’s desperate for attention and has no moral integrity. I’m starting to think I should start calling her Asian Meg Griffin. Also, speaking of Meg Griffin, I think it’s time I point out the obvious: Allen Gregory is a cheap, significantly worse, knock off version of Stewie Griffin. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if this whole show is just a loose adaptation of Jonah Hill’s Family Guy fanfiction which he wrote while high and never edited.

Back to Lex Luther tormenting Johnny football. Unless the episode ends with Johnny Football murdering Lex Luther this subplot is going to feel like a waste.

Guillermo tries to tell Allen Gregory that his play is racist, Allen Gregory tries to convince Guillermo that it is in fact him who is the real racist because he’s pointing out how racist Allen Gregory is being. Unless the episode ends with Guillermo murdering Allen Gregory this main plot is going to feel like a waste.

Guillermo quits the play and Allen Gregory’s teacher does what she should have done right away and shuts down Allen Gregory’s racist play. Good, great, except there are still 8 loving minutes left in the episode so I know this little poo poo is going to somehow end up staging his play anyway.

And then we find out that Allen Gregory’s teacher was raped by the school super intendent.

Great.

Good.

More rape.

Just what this show needed.

Gina (I’m going to start calling Allen Gregory’s teacher by her name now, I feel like she deserves some small amount of dignity and the show certainly isn’t going to give it to her) is forced by her rapist boss to allow Allen Gregory to put on his racist play.

Why did someone write this? Why did they force other people to animate it? Why, just, why any of this?

Johnny Football quits his job, but he doesn’t kill Lex Luther, episodes not over yet though so there’ still hope.

Keith David shows up to tell Allen Gregory that he’s not really racist. This is the worst thing Keith David has ever been forced to do, and Keith David was on The Cape. I’ve never actually seen The Cape, I’m just assuming it was bad because it was canceled after one season. Just like Allen Gregory (Thank God).

Allen Gregory stages his racist play, and holy poo poo is it racist. I have never wanted to punch Jonah Hill more than I do right now.

People start to boo Allen Gregory’s horrible, HORRIBLE play. It looks like Allen Gregory might actually face consequences for his terrible actions, but then things wrap up in the dumbest way possible: Guillermo (who has decided to attend this loving play for some unknown reason despite knowing how bad and racist it was going to be) walks on stage and literally says “racism is bad”, this is enough to get the crowd cheering. Allen Gregory gets credit for Guillermo’s actions and now everything thinks Allen Gregory’s racist play is good. Allen Gregory gets a standing ovation.

gently caress this show.

This is the worst episode yet. I feel retroactively ashamed about having said nice things about the last episode because this one is so bad it cancels all the good stuff out.

Two more episodes left. I know they’ll be bad, but they can’t possibly be more unpleasant than this.

Space Cadet Omoly fucked around with this message at 08:27 on Apr 20, 2017

As Nero Danced
Sep 3, 2009

Alright, let's do this


Hang in there, buddy. You're almost done. You'll get a slight reprieve at the end of the next episode (gently caress I remember more and more of the show now) but it doesn't last and a meteor doesn't take out Allen or the bald dad, so it's not enough, but for ten seconds you will be content.

Then right back to poo poo.

Space Cadet Omoly
Jan 15, 2014

Yay




As Nero Danced posted:

a meteor doesn't take out Allen or the bald dad.

That's a shame, every episode of this show should end with a meteor taking out Allen Gregory and bald dad.

DukeofCA
Aug 17, 2011

I am shocked and appalled.

How much creative input did Jonah Hill have with this show? Because I'm really starting to wonder if he has an unhealthy obsession with rape.

GobiasIndustries
Dec 14, 2007



Lipstick Apathy

Just rip the bandaid off and watch the last two episodes, OP. Only ~45 minutes of torture and you will be free

get that OUT of my face
Feb 10, 2007



The next episode is the least-bad one. The last one... well, I already told you.

curse of flubber
Mar 12, 2007
I CAN'T HELP BUT DERAIL THREADS WITH MY VERY PRESENCE

I ALSO HAVE A CLOUD OF DEDICATED IDIOTS FOLLOWING ME SHITTING UP EVERY THREAD I POST IN

IGNORE ME AND ANY DINOSAUR THAT FIGHTS WITH ME BECAUSE WE JUST CAN'T SHUT UP


Someone should do a fan animation of the secret final episode where all the terrible characters and writers are burning in hell for all eternity.

bunnyofdoom
Mar 29, 2008

He wants to come in...




Wait, hang the gently caress on, what is with all the rape as a humour thing? Like Lex Luthor and Johnny Football, the teacher, and all that. Is Jonah Hill a rapist?

I Am Fowl
Mar 8, 2008

nononononono


bunnyofdoom posted:

Wait, hang the gently caress on, what is with all the rape as a humour thing? Like Lex Luthor and Johnny Football, the teacher, and all that. Is Jonah Hill a rapist?

I guess the lesson we can learn from this show is to not be surprised when the truth comes out sometime in the next one to Cosby years.

precision
May 7, 2006

Gonna have me some good friends around
Gonna have me some good times in town




Whoever said rape can't be funny has clearly never tried to imagine Jonah Hill raping somebody.

jalapeno_dude
Apr 10, 2015


precision posted:

Whoever said rape can't be funny has clearly never tried to imagine Jonah Hill raping somebody.

why does this forum not have a report post button

bunnyofdoom
Mar 29, 2008

He wants to come in...




jalapeno_dude posted:

why does this forum not have a report post button

But it does?

I Am Fowl
Mar 8, 2008

nononononono


jalapeno_dude posted:

why does this forum not have a report post button

It does. You're just not a Platinum User of Something Awful. Benefits include ability to report, pm, and a neat little grenade next to your name.

jalapeno_dude
Apr 10, 2015


Mr. Fowl posted:

It does. You're just not a Platinum User of Something Awful. Benefits include ability to report, pm, and a neat little grenade next to your name.

is the grenade so that I can imagine posts I don't like being exploded

EDIT: oh wait, it's already next to most of those

bobkatt013
Oct 8, 2006

You’re telling me Peter Parker is ...... Spider-man!?


Sounds like this best describes the experience of watching this show

And then, from somewhere deep and previously unknown, there sprang a reserve of fortitude and courage. [Or was it resignation... Or fatalism... Or nihilism? Or perhaps I simply understood, from the darkest corner of my soul, that these pancakes couldn't kill me because I was already dead.

Andorra
Dec 12, 2012


I don't know why you don't find the rapes jokes funny. I mean haha the teacher was raped. Look at the dad, he was happily married... but got raped! ahahaha

BioEnchanted
Aug 9, 2011

He plays for the dreamers that forgot how to dream, and the lovers that forgot how to love.

Honestly, Rape Jokes need to be very carefuly played, specifically the rape itself cannot be the joke. Examples of jokes with similarly base material were done better in Reefer Madness The Musical, because the jokes are about the situation and perceptions of it. When the tweaker is trying to take advantage of Mary Lane for example, and getting her high only reverses the situation and makes her go complete dominatrix and now he's trying to escape her - the real joke is that this is what the parents in the framing device ACTUALLY BELIEVE! The OTT sex stuff is pretty much just informing that point, that it's not hyperbole to these parents that we know it is, they literally think marijuana will turn their children into "Hooligans and Whores" with no filter for metaphor.

Also the intentionally unpleasant lyric about Jack getting stoned and raping his wife isn't the joke, the joke is that she's just admitted that fact to a street full of complete strangers who didn't know, didn't want to know and are reacting with about as much discomfort as anyone would about a random couple airing their dirty laundry all over the place.

This of course assumes that the jokes are at all necessary to the plot - in this case the first one is a dark exaggeration of a fake reality that idiots think is the literal truth, and the other informs the woman's decision to turn on Jack towards the end of the movie. At least somewhat necessary for the story that they were trying to tell.

Kavak
Aug 23, 2009




Or this sketch, where the joke is "What the gently caress is wrong with this guy"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yh1RkRxnAOs

Space Cadet Omoly
Jan 15, 2014

Yay




bunnyofdoom posted:

Wait, hang the gently caress on, what is with all the rape as a humour thing? Like Lex Luthor and Johnny Football, the teacher, and all that. Is Jonah Hill a rapist?

First of all, no I don't think Jonah Hill is a rapist.

I do, however, I think he (and whoever else was involved in making this show) thought "edgy" automatically meant "good" and was badly mistaken. Like I said before, there aren't so much "rape jokes" in Allen Gregory as there are "rape statements". Instead of trying to tell jokes about rape or where rape is the punchline characters just sort of mention things like "I was recently sexually assaulted" or "I have recently committed a sexual assault and plan to do so again in the near future". It's the laziest kind of shock humor, and it's repeated ad nauseum every episode.

It's completely unnecessary too: the one episode where Lex Luther and Johnny Football aren't reduced to being walking rape/abuse jokes is the one episode where they're both funny and engaging. Lex Luther is a pretentious buffoon, Johnny Football is down to earth and rational, they play well off each other. If the show had just been a character driven comedy about two regular gay guys living in the city and loving each other it probably would have been much better. Trying too hard to be shocking, ironically, made the the show duller and less intresting.

Anyway, new episode summary coming soon.

get that OUT of my face
Feb 10, 2007



bunnyofdoom posted:

Wait, hang the gently caress on, what is with all the rape as a humour thing? Like Lex Luthor and Johnny Football, the teacher, and all that. Is Jonah Hill a rapist?
The archived thread had an excerpt of an interview he gave with AOL, and he thought it would be funny to have a show like Eastbound and Down- a show he loves- where the main character doesn't eat poo poo at the end of every episode. He also mentioned that if he were given the opportunity to make more episodes (the show wasn't canceled yet when he gave it), he'd lean in even harder on the show's moronic concept. Thank God Fox didn't give him an opportunity.

Space Cadet Omoly
Jan 15, 2014

Yay




Allen Gregory Episode Six: Like a Yeast Infection for Your Eyes

After some unfunny classroom banter and unfunny jokes about male pregnancy (I could go into more detail on these, but I won’t. Just trust me when I say they’re awful.) Allen Gregory decides he wants to meet his birth mother.

Lex Luther doesn’t want him to find his mom for…some reason…I guess to stretch the plot out? Anyway, Allen Gregory gets Keith David to drive him to the Hall of Record so he can try and find his mom anyway. Keith David starts a fire and grabs Allen Gregory’s mom’s file in a scene that might have been funny if Allen Gregory wasn’t involved.

It turns out Allen Gregory’s mom is waitress named Sheila. I already feel incredibly sorry for her. If I found out I had given birth to a childlike demon creature such as Allen Gregory I would kill it and then myself to atone for my sins. Hopefully Sheila handles her grief a bit better.

Allen Gregory meets his mom for the first time. It is a scene that is utterly devoid of human emotion. Despite not seeming to like her (although he doesn’t really like anybody) Allen Gregory decides he wants his mom back in his life. Rather than just telling her he’s her bio-son he decides to trick her into dating his gay dad. Hilarious antics do not ensue.

Lex Luther, Sheila, and Allen Gregory have a family day together. Johnny Football also comes and is relentlessly abused. Asian Meg Griffin was left at home.

Allen Gregory forces Johnny Football to sleep on the couch so Sheila can sleep in his bed. Asian Meg Griffin warns Johnny Football he’s being pushed out of the family. I have no idea why he wouldn’t WANT to be pushed out. Lex Luther constantly rapes him, Allen Gregory is a nightmare child, getting thrown out of this abusive household would be the best thing that ever happened to Johnny Football.

Turns out Asian Meg Griffin is right; Allen Gregory takes her and Johnny Football out to dinner and “breaks up” with Johnny Football. Johnny Football should take this opportunity to run as fast as he can and has far as he can away from all these horrible people (maybe take Asian Meg Griffin with him, she can be cool sometimes), but Stockholm Syndrome compels him to want to stay with Lex Luther.

Speaking of Lex Luther, he’s about to have sex with Sheila. He doesn’t want to, but he is. Because that’s what Allen Gregory wants, and even Lex Luther must bend to the whims of the demon child. I have no idea why Sheila even WANTS to have sex with him, Lex Luther is both clearly gay and treats her like garbage, I guess she just wants to move the plot along.

And so Johnny Football walks in on Sheila and Lex Luther having awkward and unpleasant sex. After seeing this he FINALLY decides to leave his long-time rapist/abuser. Hurray! It’s a happy ending! Wait, what? There’s still eight more minutes left in the episode? Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.
Sheila moves in right away and starts trying to make Allen Gregory do chores and tells Asian Meg Griffin to call her mom. Which, uh, yeah, that’s actually kind of weird. I mean, the episode tries to play it off as normal and presents Allen Gregory being an rear end in a top hat for not going along with it, but she just met these people. It’s weird to move in with someone you just met (was she homeless before this?), it’s weird to start aggressively parenting two kids you just met, and it’s extra weird to just force yourself into the lives of strangers. Why is she doing this? I guess she just wants to move the plot along.

Cut to Johnny Football in a bar. He and the bar tender have a long conversation about how Johnny football is better off without Lex Luther and how there’s no logical reason for him to want to go back to him and there’s nothing that he’s left behind that’s worth missing. Johnny football is going to go back to Lex Luther at the end of this episode anyway, isn’t he?

Sheila continues aggressively parenting Allen Gregory and Allen Gregory doesn’t enjoy it. As great as it is seeing Allen Gregory suffer, it’s still kinda weird that this lady has so little going on in her life that she’s willing to drop everything and devote her entire existence to a boy she barely knows. But then I guess that’s what everyone one else on the show does too. Oh, and Lex Luther is miserable now that Johnny football is gone. Good, gently caress Lex Luther.

Cut to Johnny Football in his new apartment, happily drinking a beer and watching TV. Looks like he’s off to a good start with his new life! Then Allen Gregory shows up (Boo!) and tries to drag Johnny Football back to a life of abuse because he’s decided he hates his new mom and wants Johnny Football to kick her out. Long story short, he succeeds and tricks Johnny Football into going back to Lex Luther (Booooooooooooo!) and so Lex Luther and Johnny Football get back together (Boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!).

Oh, and Sheila decides to leave and have no further contact with Allen Gregory. Wait, what, why? Why would she suddenly give up on this kid she’s suddenly decided to get so emotionally invested in? Sure, he’s awful, but it’s only been like a day, you’d think she’d at least give it a week before giving up. I guess she’s just decided the plot is over.

Anyway, turns out Sheila isn’t even Allen Gregory’s real birth mother, Keith David just grabbed a random file after starting that fire. Guess this episode was absolutely pointless!

Welp, that was episode six. It was bad, but not as bad as episode five. It’s was mostly just illogical and boring.

Only one more episode to go, after that let us never speak of Allen Gregory again.

Note: Someone said I should do both of the last two episodes in one night, but I don't want to so I won't be doing that. I'll post the final one tomorrow.

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As Nero Danced
Sep 3, 2009

Alright, let's do this


Refresh my memory, if you don't mind. Didn't Sheila tell Allen in the last scene that he was a rotten little brat with no redeeming qualities, and that she couldn't stand to be in his presence any longer?

I may be projecting a bit, but I vaguely remember her telling him off before leaving.

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