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quote:Doug Evans, the company’s founder, would compare himself with Steve Jobs in his pursuit of juicing perfection. He declared that his juice press wields four tons of force—“enough to lift two Teslas,” he said. Google’s venture capital arm and other backers poured about $120 million into the startup. Juicero sells the machine for $400, plus the cost of individual juice packs delivered weekly. Tech blogs have dubbed it a “Keurig for juice.”  https://www.bloomberg.com/news/features/2017-04-19/silicon-valley-s-400-juicer-may-be-feeling-the-squeeze I can't wait to put this next to my Keurig and my Keurig Kold in my condo on seastead island. Hopefully I can pay for the Juicero in Bitcoin.
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Apr 19, 2017 17:38
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so it is squeezing juice out of a prejuiced bag? I am not sure they understand what a juicer is supposed to do.
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Apr 19, 2017 17:44
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donkey salami posted:so it is squeezing juice out of a prejuiced bag? I am not sure they understand what a juicer is supposed to do. It's supposed to sucker venture capital out of investors.
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Apr 19, 2017 17:45
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Why do people hate themselves enough to self harm with such a poo poo juice machine?
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Apr 19, 2017 17:48
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donkey salami posted:so it is squeezing juice out of a prejuiced bag? I am not sure they understand what a juicer is supposed to do. You don't understand, it is disrupting the juicing industry.
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Apr 19, 2017 17:48
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donkey salami posted:so it is squeezing juice out of a prejuiced bag? I am not sure they understand what a juicer is supposed to do. what, am I supposed to extract my own juice from the juice container, like some kind of peasant?
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Apr 19, 2017 17:48
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Surprised to see no mention of the stupider thing... it's a juicer that cost $120 million to develop and you can't even put your own stuff in it... you have to use the company's own "packs". People funded that?
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Apr 19, 2017 17:50
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So in other words they are delivering normal juice to your house every week and the bag and squeeze machine are completely pointless and probably hiding the fact that you are overplaying for your juice!
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Apr 19, 2017 17:51
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donkey salami posted:so it is squeezing juice out of a prejuiced bag? I am not sure they understand what a juicer is supposed to do. Maybe there's fresh fruit in the bag or something?
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Apr 19, 2017 17:52
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I'll wait for the Chinese knockoff, thanks
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Apr 19, 2017 17:53
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Why is this better than just buying a jug of juice?
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Apr 19, 2017 17:54
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I get all my juice from decentralized anonymous loose fruit and veggies. Down with fiat juice!
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Apr 19, 2017 17:54
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Moonshine Rhyme posted:I'll wait for the Chinese knockoff, thanks
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Apr 19, 2017 17:54
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Dr Cheeto posted:Why is this better than just buying a jug of juice? iot will read the cool QR codes to make sure it's not recall or expired for ur safety and protect goony retards
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Apr 19, 2017 17:55
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Dr Cheeto posted:Why is this better than just buying a jug of juice? This way you can create more garbage and also have something to talk about at your next cocktail party when you look into your friend's dead eyes and realize none of you have lived a day in your life
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Apr 19, 2017 17:55
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TenementFunster posted:good news - this thing is absolutely made in china by slave labor, and still $400 Maybe I can get the factory to send over a technician to squeeze the juice out of the bag for me, sounds like that's all the rage
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Apr 19, 2017 17:55
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LMAO end stage capitalism sure is loving stupid. I bet you can control that juicer from an app.
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Apr 19, 2017 17:57
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i just eat whole fruits and then regurgitate the non-juice parts
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Apr 19, 2017 17:57
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The machine is evidently very slow compared to even regular juicing + cleanup if you intend to have more than one glass of juice.
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Apr 19, 2017 17:58
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quote:Juicero declined to comment. A person close to the company said Juicero is aware the packs can be squeezed by hand but that most people would prefer to use the machine because the process is more consistent and less messy. The device also reads a QR code printed on the back of each produce pack and checks the source against an online database to ensure the contents haven’t expired or been recalled, the person said. The expiration date is also printed on the pack. Three years in development, 400 custom parts, a wireless chip and antenna and a QR scanner to squeeze a bag of pre-juiced juice into a cup.
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Apr 19, 2017 17:58
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EvilJoven posted:LMAO end stage capitalism sure is loving stupid. Naw, for every piece of poo poo like this there's million of other products to fill every niche of your existence, it's actually impressive
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Apr 19, 2017 17:59
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I bet that stupid loving pouch is also not recyclable, contains DRM technology, and costs like four times as much as even the most healthy juice you can buy in a carton at the store like a normal person.
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Apr 19, 2017 18:00
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Spunky Psycho Ho posted:Naw, for every piece of poo poo like this there's million of other products to fill every niche of your existence, it's actually impressive People are gadgeting their way into an existence akin to the fatass future people from WallE and this is not a good thing.
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Apr 19, 2017 18:01
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EvilJoven posted:I bet that stupid loving pouch is also not recyclable, contains DRM technology, and costs like four times as much as even the most healthy juice you can buy in a carton at the store like a normal person. Yes to all
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Apr 19, 2017 18:01
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I have a Breville juicer and use it to juice stuff I didn't get around to eating in time. I thought it was absurd to do, and a symbol of my decadence. Little did I know.
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Apr 19, 2017 18:01
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EvilJoven posted:People are gadgeting their way into an existence akin to the fatass future people from WallE and this is not a good thing. The gadgets dont actually support this, all we needed for that was tv and hungry man, the gadgets are pointless nothings on the way to nowhere
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Apr 19, 2017 18:02
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I like that a bunch of rich people wasted a lot of money on this stupid thing
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Apr 19, 2017 18:02
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shovelbum posted:The gadgets dont actually support this, all we needed for that was tv and hungry man, the gadgets are pointless nothings on the way to nowhere to preserve our glorious civilization we must move as much metal and hydrocarbons as possible from the ground to the landfill
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Apr 19, 2017 18:03
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Trigger warning https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1oHp-VvhDE
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Apr 19, 2017 18:04
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The F-35 of juicers
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Apr 19, 2017 18:05
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I'm the fat guy in the v-neck
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Apr 19, 2017 18:06
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I cant wait for the bubble to pop in the middle of the dystopia going on right now.
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Apr 19, 2017 18:05
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r u ready to WALK posted:Trigger warning No wonder everyone's a loving sadbrains, we're so caught up in our capitalist disposable convenience society that people actually want this loving stupid thing.
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Apr 19, 2017 18:07
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Apr 19, 2017 18:07
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r u ready to WALK posted:Trigger warning So it seems like they suggest in this commercial the bag is full of produce rather than juice, are they just flagrantly lying then?
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Apr 19, 2017 18:07
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Personally, I can't wait to find out what kind of nice things the history books will say about us.
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Apr 19, 2017 18:07
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Seriously this loving thing makes me want to set fire to all my poo poo and go find one of those lost Amazon tribes and beg them to not eat me and instead let me live with them because they live in the past and the present is complete loving crap.
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Apr 19, 2017 18:09
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Maldoror posted:Surprised to see no mention of the stupider thing... it's a juicer that cost $120 million to develop and you can't even put your own stuff in it... you have to use the company's own "packs". People funded that? yeah, they were hoping to sell expensive gadgets tied to expensive juice bags to suckers. with any scam, there's two kinds of people involved - the suckers who lose money, and the people who hope to take the sucker's money quote:Evans, 50, follows a diet of mostly raw, vegan foods. Technology was a new thing for him, but he picked it up quickly. He said he spent about three years building a dozen prototypes before devising Juicero’s patent-pending press. In an interview with technology website Recode, he likened his work to the invention of a mainstream personal computer by Apple’s Jobs. “There are 400 custom parts in here,” Evans told Recode. “There’s a scanner; there’s a microprocessor; there’s a wireless chip, wireless antenna.” this is basically just a high tech flashy version of things you see on loud dumb commercials that cost two easy payments of 19.95, it's an impulse buy for gullible people who get roped into a lifestyle boner confessor fucked around with this message at 18:11 on Apr 19, 2017 |
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Apr 19, 2017 18:09
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Burn silicon valley to the ground and hang all the bankers and vc
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Apr 19, 2017 18:10
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I had a keurig bc it was lying around or i got it for free, and when i ran out of the cups i inheirted or whatever i got a little coffee filter for it and then i got sick of making 1 cup at a time and i got a $20 coffee pot and its way better and has a timer thats my disposable pod story
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Apr 19, 2017 18:12
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