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you know what's dumber than a useless $400 juicer? two of them https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qczImf93M_E
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Apr 20, 2017 12:58
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Man has squeezed fruit from the beginning of time, and each new frontier has brought new ways to squeeze and new places to squeeze in. Why should the future be different?
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Apr 20, 2017 13:13
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today i set down on an apple, but nobody is paying me $700 for that
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Apr 20, 2017 15:57
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lorn Wayne posted:develop an iOS and android app for apple-sitting 2.0 and i'll invest $700 million. my rental contract explicitly forbids shifting web 6.1 paradigms in my flat, i'm sorry
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Apr 20, 2017 16:05
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dev286 posted:So, it's not just a pouch filled with pre-pressed juice? Or is it a scam where he uses actual chopped up stuff for the media but the shipped product is like a capri sun? it's not pre-pressed. it's just very, very easy to squeeze juice out of a fruit with your bare hands and people have been doing that since forever. it's even easier if you chop the fruit up into tiny pieces before squeezing.
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Apr 20, 2017 16:13
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i can't wait till one of these morons accidentally juices their kid or a pet in that thing and we get to watch the ensuing lawsuit. i'm keeping my calendar open
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Apr 20, 2017 16:19
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Spunky Psycho Ho posted:Fortunately the machine will not work if it doesn't recognize the QR code on the bag, jokes on you i heard that if you hold a nazi death camp bar code tattoo into the scanner, the machine will tell you a jew joke 
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Apr 20, 2017 16:30
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the only way how they can make this retarded contraption perfect is by publicly announcing that they are gonna donate all the collected left over fruit fiber from the bags to a homeless shelter in San Fransisco
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Apr 20, 2017 18:17
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the cool thing about the collapse of the western roman empire is that it was such a complex and poly-causal process that you can blame everything and everyone for it and be right. like immigrants, decadence, christianity, the climate, taxes, juicers, etc.
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Apr 20, 2017 18:58
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shovelbum posted:I like all the goons smugging about how filthy fresh food is and how paying money for a nice entree salad is just the same as a CiCi's pizza salad bar which u should go to instead hot take, don't burn yourself
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Apr 20, 2017 19:21
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Bonzo posted:Here's one for 1700 CAD that's kinda cool, but you can build this yourself with a cheap arduino knockoff, a cardboard box and some minor homedepot/radioshack crap for $59.99 millennials are too lazy to take care of a plant and too lazy to build an automated growbox that would take care of the plant. is there anything in existence that millenials are not too lazy for?
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Apr 20, 2017 20:05
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shovelbum posted:the bag has been registered as used with the server im sorry i can't wait till we all have self-destructing heart plugs installed that trigger on consuming unlicensed food. no more profit stealing by dirty food pirates 
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Apr 20, 2017 20:38
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Rad Russian posted:Why don't they have one for beer??? I buy a $1000 brewing machine and pay $7 per an ingredient packet, and then the machine brews a glass of beer for me right in my house. somewhere out there an overworked patent clerk just sighed and a patent lawyer saw a dollar sign flash before his eyes
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Apr 20, 2017 20:45
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I didn't even realize that this was a three olives thread or that he posted in here until I read "HOA" and then everything fell into place and I KNEW it was olives, whiteout even having to look to the username. True story.
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Apr 20, 2017 22:38
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Serak posted:erotically squeezed juices i finally know how i want to die
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Apr 21, 2017 11:47
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Jack-Off Lantern posted:I'm gonna make an app that delivers pizza to you while you sleep. We're gonna break in, take the money from your wallet and put the pizza on the floor so you can have floor pizza the next day. my parents gave me 4 million to invest in blue chip stocks, but i see you have some nice paradigm shifting beans there. i'm in.
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Apr 21, 2017 12:05
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free hubcaps posted:can someone just invent the god drat mood organ from do androids dream of electric sheep already it already exists and it's called drugs but if you are not into xanax, there is also poo poo like http://www.thync.com/ it will make you feel drunk or happy or relaxed or whatever with the touch of a single button. it's backed by peer reviewed studies, an FDA approval and most important it has an iOS/android app (but no windows, lol)
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Apr 21, 2017 14:41
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Three Olives posted:OMG. The only thing the "Juicero Platform" does is decide if it will let their $400 machine press out a bag of juice that they sold you and they are reserving the right to charge you for that too. please shout "McDonald's!" to get your requested juice
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Apr 22, 2017 17:15
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in 100000 years some ape archeologist will find the remains of one of these retarded juicers in the nuked out ruins of san fransisco and it will start an entire debate on what the hell it was used for. someone will propose that it was NOT a religious or decorative item because it had a wifi antenna and some kind of optical scanner and he will come up with the crackpot idea that it was used for making juice. he will be ridiculed by ape academia for this and it will probably end his ape career and for the rest of this life he will have to moderate the alien astronaut show on ape history channel.
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Apr 23, 2017 12:13
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Three Olives posted:He had pancreatic cancer which generally means you are completely hosed but he managed to get an extremely rare form that has a really good prognosis. Like almost every person with pancreatic cancer would murder someone and drink the blood of freshly juiced puppies to have his cancer and he decided, nah, I'm good, I'm going to try natural cures and poo poo. By the time he realized the juice and stuff wasn't going to work and he needed actual medical care it was too late, the cancer had metastasized to his liver and he was hosed. Seems like tech bros and fruit have a long and tragic history together
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Apr 24, 2017 19:09
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Three Olives posted:http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/security-robot-toddler_us_57863670e4b03fc3ee4e8f3a good
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Apr 25, 2017 18:43
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~~juice life~~ e: ~~~juice life~~~ 
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Apr 25, 2017 18:50
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Electric kettles are like the most common appliance in a European kitchen and they only cost something like 15$. They are probably not that common in the US due to your hillbilly 110V electrical grid. Nothing wrong with an electrical kettle. 
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Apr 26, 2017 09:55
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Rhesus Pieces posted:If we actually lived in a meritocracy these people would be reduced to eating tree bark by now that's the thing you people never seem to understand. for you, It's just some idiot with a useless juice press or a retarded android gadget, but I see a genius who can suck hundreds of millions of dollars out of fool's pockets like some kind of hungry vacuum cleaner. it's the ultimate trade meeting its ultimate practitioner.
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Apr 26, 2017 16:29
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https://youtu.be/PobIVgIPoew
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Apr 27, 2017 20:27
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Smoothie guy, it's more or less the same. But you still need to use your jaw muscles from time to time, so that they don't atrophy. Same goes for your teeth. Apparently the roots can weaken, if you don't use them. The Soylent Green community recommend chewing on your pillow once or twice per day to stay healthy.
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Apr 28, 2017 11:01
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Toys For rear end Bum posted:Why couldn't we get that? Instead of some overpriced cum-sludge that keeps getting recalled Would be more efficient to announce when its currently not being recalled Tin Can Hit Man posted:So you need a device to tell you when your baby shat itself? scan qr code on the diaper, shout "PAMPERS!", scan the qr code on your arm, scan the qr code on your baby's forehead, pair the diaper with your phone and your are done! when your baby poo poo it's pants you will now get a message on your phone with selected ads for fascinating new baby products. i can't wait
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Apr 28, 2017 13:42
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Rutibex posted:its indisputable facts friend. if you don't believe in the prophet ray kerzweil then you may as well not believe in global warming too, its the same concept. your not a science denier are you? juicero doesn't really fit the curve, seems dodgy to me
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Apr 29, 2017 16:10
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Pick posted:what the fu What is the sound that people make when they discover late stage capitalism?
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Apr 29, 2017 18:56
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| # ¿ May 2, 2024 20:47 |
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CharlestonJew posted:so idk dick about engineering but from that Canadian guy's video these juicers cost $1000+ to make and they had so much faith in their subscription model they were selling them for $400? lol These dumb juice packs cost $8 a piece. Generously subtract $1 for production, shipping and handling costs from that and you have $7*365=$2555 pure profit per year. Fleecing idiots with too much money is a gold mine. That's why they got $120M in VC for that poo poo in the first place e: the most important part of this scheme is that it shouldn't be possible to buy these juice packs off brand for $1 a piece at the store and also no way to reduce the consumption, which is where the DRM and subscription comes in. If you already got the juice in the fridge, if you already paid for it, you are probably gonna use it anyway. GABA ghoul fucked around with this message at 12:48 on May 28, 2017 |
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May 28, 2017 12:45
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