Jokes that are good but you can't be bothered to develop a thread for

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nut

HOT4DREMELS posted:

Holding in a poo poo to absorb all of the Nutrients

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/BowedParallelAcouchi-mobile.mp4
god bles manifisto for the springtime signature

# ? Apr 4, 2021 14:56

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 13, 2021 11:26

google THIS

Two roads diverged underground, and I�
I didn't take the left turn at Albuquerque,
And that has made all the difference.

# ? Apr 4, 2021 21:43

Dip Viscous

Immobile Robot Chonging

# ? Apr 4, 2021 22:15

Prurient Squid: Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.

I have a confusion to make.

# ? Apr 5, 2021 17:52

Finger Prince: "I think he's watching us..."

"No, it's just the Mountain Peeks."
(Source)

Writing an in depth gear review for some audiophile publication and when it comes to the bit where you wax poetic about the stereo image etc., the musical examples you cite are some badly recorded 70's afro-funk band nobody has heard of, and some bootleg Beastie Boys hardcore set that only exists on a cassette you got from a friend in 1982, and Darude: Sandstorm from a YouTube link.

# ? Apr 5, 2021 20:16

Finger Prince: "I think he's watching us..."

"No, it's just the Mountain Peeks."
(Source)

Going to Best Buy or similar and somehow changing the demo reel on all their big wow 4k TVs to 4k best of compilations of the hydraulic press channel.

# ? Apr 6, 2021 02:32

RickRogers: Woh, is that a thing I like??

PC rig building with water cooling, LEDs, 4K SLI and more *Buzz Words*.
But all you want is to emulate an Atari jaguar

# ? Apr 6, 2021 11:50

Finger Prince: "I think he's watching us..."

"No, it's just the Mountain Peeks."
(Source)

RickRogers posted:

PC rig building with water cooling, LEDs, 4K SLI and more *Buzz Words*.
But all you want is to emulate an Atari jaguar

I feel attacked.

# ? Apr 6, 2021 12:06

RickRogers: Woh, is that a thing I like??

Finger Prince posted:

I feel attacked.

"Cool rig! What else are you going to emulate?"

"Else?"

# ? Apr 6, 2021 15:03

Ventral EggSac

Willy Wonka goes to hell and is sentenced to always feeling like he just drank orange juice after brushing his teeth

# ? Apr 6, 2021 16:44

Ventral EggSac

He walks around smacking his lips and going "mmaaah, Aaah"

# ? Apr 6, 2021 16:45

Yinlock

100% unnatural ingredients

# ? Apr 6, 2021 20:36

Skanky Burns

Well legally speaking, it is not classed as food so we can put whatever we want in there.

# ? Apr 6, 2021 23:18

google THIS

We squeezed some real lemon juice in there because we ran out of artificial lemon flavor. I know it's not the same, but

# ? Apr 7, 2021 02:17

Dip Viscous

innatural means unnatural???

# ? Apr 7, 2021 02:32

Yinlock

google THIS posted:

We squeezed some real lemon juice in there because we ran out of artificial lemon flavor. I know it's not the same, but

# ? Apr 7, 2021 05:19

magic cactus: We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.

Finger Prince posted:

Writing an in depth gear review for some audiophile publication and when it comes to the bit where you wax poetic about the stereo image etc., the musical examples you cite are some badly recorded 70's afro-funk band nobody has heard of, and some bootleg Beastie Boys hardcore set that only exists on a cassette you got from a friend in 1982, and Darude: Sandstorm from a YouTube link.

https://giant.gfycat.com/GrimySilverGermanpinscher.mp4

https://i.imgur.com/c5aCy61.mp4

Spring 2021 sig brought to you by Pot Smoke Phoenix
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Fall 2020 sig by BYOB's own living legend, Nut!
Spring 2020 sig by the one-and-only Heather Papps!
Summer 2020 sig by Pot Smoke Phoenix!

# ? Apr 8, 2021 04:35

Prurient Squid: Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.

God creates the best of all possible worlds but his trade offs are really questionable.

# ? Apr 8, 2021 13:11

magic cactus: We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.

Prurient Squid posted:

God creates the best of all possible worlds but his trade offs are really questionable.

"so why did you allow suffering?"

"it was either that or get rid of pumpkin spice."

# ? Apr 9, 2021 00:38

Jaguars!

"This one seems good, what's wrong with it?"

"Butts aren't funny here"

# ? Apr 9, 2021 00:49

Ventral EggSac

Ok this one developed torture, but look at the platypus. I can't delete this now, right? I mean come on, look at this.

# ? Apr 9, 2021 12:29

take the moon

seeing dead people but not talking to them cuz dead people are jerks

_{sig by heather papps}

_{sig gob by khanstant}

# ? Apr 9, 2021 18:16

Gene Hackman Fan

take the moon posted:

seeing dead people but not talking to them cuz dead people are jerks

haley joel osmand looking at a ghost with a gunshot wound to the chest: "...you know, i think i understand why you got shot."

Gene Hackman Fan fucked around with this message at 21:13 on Apr 9, 2021

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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Apr 9, 2021 19:47

Ventral EggSac

One at a time ONE AT A TIME if you ghosts can't share I swear I am packing up this Ouija board and no one gets to talk to their kids, does that sound like fun to you?
I will turn this s�ance around if you can't behave so help me god

# ? Apr 9, 2021 20:02

Finger Prince: "I think he's watching us..."

"No, it's just the Mountain Peeks."
(Source)

Ventral EggSac posted:

One at a time ONE AT A TIME if you ghosts can't share I swear I am packing up this Ouija board and no one gets to talk to their kids, does that sound like fun to you?
I will turn this séance around if you can't behave so help me god

Jesus appears. "Sorry, did you want some help with something?"

"Oh now you show up."

# ? Apr 9, 2021 20:50

Gene Hackman Fan

diogenes of synope but played by groucho marx

# ? Apr 9, 2021 23:22

xcheopis

Gene Hackman Fan posted:

diogenes of synope but played by groucho marx

"I've asked for some sun block but this is ridiculous"

# ? Apr 9, 2021 23:35

Cubone: Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.

a vtuber whose virtual persona is super low-poly with a low-res static face texture on it like goldeneye?

I don't know anything about vtube, this might already exist

# ? Apr 10, 2021 01:07

RickRogers: Woh, is that a thing I like??

Xtreme rock paper scissors

E.o wait that's Pokémon

# ? Apr 10, 2021 04:16

magic cactus: We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.

guy with small penis

"my penis isn't small it just moves too fast for you to see."

# ? Apr 10, 2021 05:59

Prurient Squid: Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.

Vtuber but it's my avatar.

# ? Apr 10, 2021 06:18

deep dish peat moss: On a planet that increasingly resembles one huge Maximum Security prison, the only intelligent choice is to plan a jail break.

magic cactus posted:

guy with small penis

"my penis isn't small it just moves too fast for you to see."

It's actually so big that the part you're seeing is really far away

# ? Apr 11, 2021 00:32

Dip Viscous

at that distance, you'll also need to account for the coriolis effect

# ? Apr 11, 2021 01:09

RickRogers: Woh, is that a thing I like??

magic cactus posted:

guy with small penis

"my penis isn't small it just moves too fast for you to see."

Wait wait, you aren't accounting for the Doppler effect, just wait until I get further away before you judge.

# ? Apr 11, 2021 13:25

Gene Hackman Fan

xcheopis posted:

"I've asked for some sun block but this is ridiculous"

alexander: "you know, i always thought if i wasn't me, that i'd want to be you."

diogenes: "what a coincidence! if i was anybody else i'd want to be me, too."

edit: "hey socrates, your mom's calling, says your man is getting cold."

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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Apr 11, 2021 21:46