Jokes that are good but you can't be bothered to develop a thread for

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something about the chronic shortages of punch leading to the conclusion of soviet jokes

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# ¿ Apr 19, 2017 23:59

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 01:15

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mad max is already australiapunk tho?

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# ¿ Dec 3, 2017 16:23

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# ¿ Dec 8, 2017 00:05

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# ¿ Dec 8, 2017 00:40

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alnilam posted:

ironically enough, american "italian bread" looks and tastes more like it was made by an Entirely Non-Ethnic Character With No Identity of Any Kind and Nondescript Job

i think this goes for a lot of "american style" food. maybe its because the english will just put salt on and deep fry anything and becasue of imperialism and cultural hegemony we associate this as "neutral" food?

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# ¿ Dec 14, 2017 19:09

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"food" for thought

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# ¿ Dec 14, 2017 19:09

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straight up gruel is the only acceptable food

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# ¿ Dec 14, 2017 23:26

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i love animal gruel

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# ¿ Dec 14, 2017 23:33

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porn star named "atilla the hung"

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# ¿ Jun 17, 2020 20:34

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i had the idea for a thread, but i''m kind of stuck

okay, so you have the expression "beating a dead horse" which means wasting effort, and you also have masturbation as a stand-in for basically the same thing (i.e. intellectual masturbation)

"beating off" is an euphemism for masturbating

there is some potential here, but i'm kind of stuck?

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# ¿ Oct 9, 2020 18:14

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Diorama posted:

We can now freeze semen from prize thoroughbreds so that it can be used for years after, even when the horse has died. Which is lucky because there's no point beating off a dead horse,

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# ¿ Oct 9, 2020 21:25

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Sid Vicious posted:

Has anyone ever said "what's the deal with airline food?" Seems like an untapped market

i havent been served airline food ever. i suspect the likes of seinfeld killed the idea

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# ¿ Nov 13, 2020 22:44

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*in exremely jerry seinfeld voice*
todays youth get triggered too much! i'm very mmuch culturally relevant today! remember airplane peanuts??

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# ¿ Nov 13, 2020 22:46

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NO JERRY! NOBODY REMEMBERS AIRPLANE PEANUTS ANYMORE! YOU RIBBED ON THEM UNTIL THEY DIED AND THEN SOME MORE

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# ¿ Nov 13, 2020 22:48

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the deal with air plane food is both that your taste buds will react differently at 10k feet above sea levels due to air pressure

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# ¿ Nov 13, 2020 22:55

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since there arent any dead peeps posting on hte web, we can conclude that heaven doesnt get internet connection, whch sucks

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# ¿ Dec 7, 2020 21:16

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FactsAreUseless posted:

A Youtube video titled "Danish Prince Stepdad Fail"

To be or not to be? The answer will surprise you!

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# ¿ Dec 11, 2020 22:05

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10 things we would give our kingdom for

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# ¿ Dec 11, 2020 22:38

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bed, butt and byob

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# ¿ Dec 14, 2020 21:59

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Abugadu posted:

Am I in the Byob section or the Butt section? I can never tell. Does Butts have other stuff in it?

nope. there's butts all the way in

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# ¿ Dec 15, 2020 22:26

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Prurient Squid posted:

fake edit: maybe not a spaceship but more like a hedgemaze - or a maze inside a spaceship?

some kind of space maze?

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# ¿ Jan 28, 2021 17:44

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the old norse mythology promises warriors who die in battle an eternity in valhalla

which basically consists of free lodgings and food

this being such a charmingly underwhelming iron-age paradise makes me wonder about other bargain religions

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# ¿ Mar 26, 2021 22:27

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they say that if you die on the job in retail, you will live in endless peace with rent cut in half, as well as your step dad not being such a jerk

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# ¿ Mar 26, 2021 22:35

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if amazon warehouse workers apply themselves enough, the gods will grant them an afterlife with no unpaid overtime

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# ¿ Mar 26, 2021 22:37

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a story set between the hobbit and lotr, in which gandalf just smokes weed w/ hobbits

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# ¿ May 25, 2021 18:54

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so basically mostly tolkien describing the different strains and their history in excruciating detail for pages

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# ¿ May 25, 2021 18:55

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"heh, you bunglebarrows sure know how to spin a tall tale" gandalf said slyly, as he packed a new bowl. this time he used some of the Old Ferryman, which provided for a more mellow body high. old feryman was the prized crop of lower thumblehills, renowned throughout hobbiton, and exported to places as far as the mouth of dillweed river to the north. while a relative recent strain, it was mostly a higher tbc variant of the far older (if not more famous) backburn thistle, which was introduced to the halflings by the men of fornost in the third age. the halfling tradition of pipe smoking was then in its early infancy, yet the short folk had already domesticated the...

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# ¿ May 25, 2021 19:05

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tiny brain: frankenstein is the name of the monster
normal brain: aschully, frankenstein is the doctor, the monster is called adam or something
galaxy brain: dr frankenstein gave life to the monster, and it is entirely reasonable to refer to them with the same surname

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# ¿ Jun 8, 2021 16:47

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tiny brain: the monster was the real monster
normal brain: society was the real monster
galaxy brain: tbf the monster killed some completely innocent people for no good reason

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# ¿ Jun 8, 2021 16:48

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Finger Prince posted:

If you really think about it, a crown is a really fuckin weird thing to have as a symbol of supreme executive power.
Like, how do we know who the bossman is? Oh he's the one with the useless hat.

tbh its a pretty obvious way of signalling that ur in charge. most extravagantly dressed mf w/ the biggest hat is a p effective way of government, evidently

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# ¿ Jun 10, 2021 21:16

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Prurient Squid posted:

Hyper advanced post-scarcity aliens accidentally wipe out all the buildings and infrastructure on Earth with a ray beam and then relax their rule on non-sharing of advanced technology with inferior races by offering to reconstuct everything with their replicators exactly as described with no concept of how this may be abused.

e: So one guy claims he lived in a solid gold pyramid with a harem of sex robots and they just let him have it because they've lost the ability to comprehend how a sentient being might decieve another for material gain.

"also, all the pollution? totally not here before you blew this place up."

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# ¿ Jul 1, 2021 18:13

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Viginti Septem posted:

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# ¿ Oct 12, 2021 22:34

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also greed bed is a pile of gold

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# ¿ Oct 12, 2021 22:35

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Finger Prince posted:

Did it hurt? When you co-wrote the communist manifesto? Because drat, you look like an Engels.

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# ¿ Oct 21, 2021 15:59

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Prurient Squid posted:

Forget it Jake, it's Skeleton Town.

we cant stop here, this is skeleton country!

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# ¿ Oct 25, 2021 21:48

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Prof. Crocodile posted:

it seems to me that the honorable gentleman from Pennsylvania would have our nation stick its dick into 3 holes in the wall, against the advice of the farmer with whom we are lodging.

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# ¿ Oct 26, 2021 19:56

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Prurient Squid posted:

Getting framed for Mulder.

falsely accused of wasting agency funds on chasing shadows?

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# ¿ Nov 28, 2022 23:22

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the SICK man of europe

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# ¿ Dec 31, 2022 01:20

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 01:15

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that's it! we're going back to clown town!

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# ¿ Jan 4, 2023 23:55

The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > Jokes that are good but you can't be bothered to develop a thread for