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Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Rock and Roll Cat found dead in hotel from apparent overdose, reassures fans tour will continue. "I can do this eight more times."

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Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

google THIS posted:

In the duck pond, welcome to the duck pond!
Watch out for the
Sha-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na geese, geese!
Oh, I wanna eat your bread!

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

RavenousScoot posted:

the ghost of the crocodile hunter phases through your bedroom walls, tumbling around and wrangling some sort of wraith before phasing back out of the room

man, I wish

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

A blues artist that specializes in making people EXTRA bummed out by just switching the pronouns in an existing blues song from "me/mine" to "you/yours."

i.e. "Born under a bad sign. You've been down since you began to grow. If it weren't for bad luck, you know you wouldn't have no luck at all..."

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

RavenousScoot posted:

town has been beset with swarms of roving hoops, bouncing and rolling all over everything

but lo our faith can be placed in the hands of the local ragamuffins with sticks to beat back the scourge!

The Last Hoop Roller

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Karate Bastard posted:

*science show voice* Even bananas have mass.

CUT TO: Bananas kneeling in church

BANANAS: Our father who art in kitchen, yellowed be thy peel

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

demanding a refund on cereal made with "ancient grains" because carbon dating showed they were produced relatively recently

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Bright Bart posted:

Gaysketball. A sport where the aim is to dunk a smaller hoop & net into a larger one, while simultaneously trying to acquire both balls and then hit them together in mid-air.

By 2032 what started out as a demonstration sport before the 2025 Toronto Pride Festival, based almost entirely on a pseudo-pun, becomes the number one franchise in North America after the NBA, NHL, and MBA keep screwing up.

I'm gonna take the rock to the rock and the hole to the hole

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

canyoneer posted:

I'm kinda over getting told to shelter underground, I've found

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

An ad campaign with terrible advice disguised as good advice.

Like "When texting and driving, make sure to look up from your phone at least once every thirty seconds."

Or "Know your limit when drinking bleach."

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

A shot in a movie where a cool guy wears shades at the beach. It's a closeup of him and we see the reflection of palm trees and beach babes filling his glasses. He takes them off, only to reveal they were prescription eyeglasses. It wasn't a reflection. The palm trees and beach babes were on the other side of his head and we were looking through two gigantic holes in his head.

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Super reverse horse whisperer: a horse screams in your ear to give you anxiety.

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Dukberry posted:

imagine a thread where we all pretend we're in line to microwave our lunch at the office break room, but the line has been going on for quite a while! uh oh! what could be happening?

Hurry up! This salmon and broccoli ain't gonna cook itself.

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

The Voice of Labor posted:

dude goes down to the used car lot and gets a good deal on a pope mobile only to find out that the transubstantiation is going out and the friars are bald

sensible lol

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Karate Bastard posted:

Actually on reflection, tactical breast milk may not be that stupid. Many situations where an infant's wail would give away your position, disrupt functions, etc

A mace-like spray can of tactical breast milk for non-lethal crowd control at baby protests

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

a new barista at Starbucks is instructed to put a tea bag in hot water, but mishears this as "d-bag" and drowns a guy with a popped collar.

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

One of those characters from movies or old sci-fi who's a librarian or whatever who expounds on how great ~BOOKS!~ are, and how these new fangled tablets and whatever just can't beat a heavy, musty, tangible tome made with real paper you can feel and smell. No sir, he'll go on on and on, when you really want to know about something BOOKS are where it's at, etc. etc..

Turns out he fucks the books.

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

RavenousScoot posted:

a genie who perverts your wishes
not like they backfire, they come true, but they're all really horny
like this is magic rule34

and yes, the lamp is limp, and when you rub it it emits :nws: instead of smoke while it grows and throbs before your Dirty Djinn sputters and oozes out

Robin Williams cartoon genie riffing on your filthiest, most private sexual desires and curiosities brought to spectacular life through the magic of Disney animation.

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

two supernatural warriors locked in an eternal gridlock. their bodies frozen, swords aimed at one another, radiating beams of force energy that keep one another statue-like atop a cathedral forevermore in stalemate until the end of time

but they still have to piss and poo poo, and their fingernails and toenails and hair still grow. some low wage worker has to routinely clean them up, change their pants, groom and sponge bathe them, feed them with a tube...

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Bright Bart posted:

A man works hard his whole life to clinb the corporations ladder.

Newsroom boy, work-study student, post-grad intern, account manager, area mananager, and junior vice president.

But it's only now, with his recent promotion, to team lead at the company's biggest dick sucking factory, that he can well and truly know his parents would be proud of him.

just shows that if you work hard, you can suck seed.

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Aliens come and land on our planet to meet with the heads of state, and launch into a mean-spirited roast of all of them, followed by threats to annihilate earth. Pandemonium ensues and civilization as we know it is upended.

It turns out they didn't mean anything by it, they just thought from all the aggression they observed in our media that we were one of those "always belligerent" species where insults were a courtesy.

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Chess, but you're just smashing the pieces together and making little fighting noises like they're action figures

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Finger Prince posted:

I'm a sexetarian. I only eat food I can gently caress.

hmm, does it count as "loving" tomato soup to insert one's genitals into it, or it just giving myself a little soup bath?

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Finger Prince posted:

Hot tip, you can make tomato soup by loving a tomato.

speaking of hot tips, if you decide to gently caress the soup, let it cool down a bit first

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Star Trek alien cosplaying as human by covering their big bumpy forehead prosthetic with a bigger, smooth forehead prosthetic

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Karate Bastard posted:

This looks like a job for...... CAPTAIN SHITMYPANTS!!!

Wtf no you're Superman

No I'm not, I'm wearing groucho glasses. *hnrrg*

This stunt extra backfires when people notice Captain Shitmypants looks just like Clark Kent with a moustache, now everyone at the office won't stop calling him Captain Shitmypants.

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

RavenousScoot posted:

new body modification trend
removal of the outer scrotum but keeping the testes
you keep your zipper down and carry them in your pocket like a chain wallet

Stopping a crime by throwing my elongated, sackless testes like a bolo

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Finger Prince posted:

The Teabagger

"It's Tea Time" I say with a smirk before speeding off in my convertable Ballmobile, exposed testicles flapping behind me in the wind

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

sending geotargeted ads of your butt to your neighbors

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

RavenousScoot posted:

no no I wasn't watching porn, I was just trying to solve this really hard assfucking puzzle
just trying to stay sharp, you know?

CUT TO: The puzzle box on the the floor, which shows that the puzzle, when assembled, will depict a photo of people assfucking

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Karate Bastard posted:

Dr Wankman's Ectoplasmic misadventure

"I slimed me."

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.


drat, tough break

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Pills In 'Er Pilsner. Brewed with roofies.

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Ahahahahahah, good evening boils and ghouls! Tonight's story is a nasty little tale we call Scary Poppins. I think you'll find that a spoonful of horror helps the meanacing go down... in the most frightful way! Ahahahahahahaha.

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

The Predater: a movie about a really old guy.

Name a thing. He predates even that.

Drink-Mix Man fucked around with this message at 08:16 on Jul 6, 2024

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Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

caspergers posted:

I'm prediabetic. It isn't quite diabetes but I do have my foot in the door

I don't know how my diabetes got so bad, I'm stumped

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