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Basebf555
Feb 29, 2008

The greatest sensual pleasure there is is to know the desires of another!


Fun Shoe

For like $20 more you can get the whole set, but I guess if you're not a huge Exorcist fan to begin with that wouldn't make sense. Personally l enjoy them all, which the exception of Renny Harlin's version of the prequel. But I really like Exorcist 2 and Dominion, more than the average person seems to at least.

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Spatulater bro!
Aug 19, 2003



Confession: I've never seen the theatrical version of The Exorcist.

Basebf555
Feb 29, 2008

The greatest sensual pleasure there is is to know the desires of another!


Fun Shoe

Spatulater bro! posted:

Confession: I've never seen the theatrical version of The Exorcist.

I really don't think its much of a confession, it's basically the same movie. It's not like it's a Kingdom of Heaven situation where entire subplots were restored, it's just a small handful of added scenes and a few little extra effects that imo aren't really very jarring at all. Certainly nothing along the lines of the song and dance routine in the Star Wars Special Editions that just instantly take you out of the movie and remind you that this is not the same version you're used to.

Franchescanado
Feb 23, 2013

If it wasn't for disappointment,
I wouldn't have any appointment.


Grimey Drawer

Confession: I wish I loved The Exorcist, but I've only had one viewing where it clicked with me, and subsequent viewings have been lackluster.

Basebf555
Feb 29, 2008

The greatest sensual pleasure there is is to know the desires of another!


Fun Shoe

Everybody's got one, personally I'm not a big fan of Nightmare on Elm Street. I've skipped it the past two Octobers.

Spatulater bro!
Aug 19, 2003



Mine is Halloween. It's always seemed, I dunno, bland I guess.

Franchescanado
Feb 23, 2013

If it wasn't for disappointment,
I wouldn't have any appointment.


Grimey Drawer

Basebf555 posted:

Everybody's got one, personally I'm not a big fan of Nightmare on Elm Street. I've skipped it the past two Octobers.

Spatulater bro! posted:

Mine is Halloween. It's always seemed, I dunno, bland I guess.



I honestly wouldn't be as into horror if it weren't for those two movies and Dead Alive and Jaws. I vividly remember watching them and the ensuing epiphany.

MacheteZombie
Feb 4, 2007

Goodness no, now that wouldn't do at all!

Basebf555 posted:

Everybody's got one, personally I'm not a big fan of Nightmare on Elm Street. I've skipped it the past two Octobers.

Basebf555
Feb 29, 2008

The greatest sensual pleasure there is is to know the desires of another!


Fun Shoe

I mean its really good, don't get me wrong. It's just not in my list of all-time favorites the way it is with most other horror fans.

Franchescanado
Feb 23, 2013

If it wasn't for disappointment,
I wouldn't have any appointment.


Grimey Drawer

Oh yeah, it wasn't meant as anything against you guys. It was just surprising to hear those movies from you two.


Also, we're half-way through June, talking in the challenge thread for May, and none of them are reviews. Not even being facetious, the October thread doesn't even last this long into November.

Leavemywife
Feb 7, 2012

Taking the term "Koopaling" to a whole new level since 2016.


Grimey Drawer

Franchescanado posted:

Oh yeah, it wasn't meant as anything against you guys. It was just surprising to hear those movies from you two.


Also, we're half-way through June, talking in the challenge thread for May, and none of them are reviews. Not even being facetious, the October thread doesn't even last this long into November.

I'm sorry. I grabbed the Return to Arkham collection and I've been spending my nights terrifying thugs.

Which should count in its own way. It's still horror involved.

Franchescanado
Feb 23, 2013

If it wasn't for disappointment,
I wouldn't have any appointment.


Grimey Drawer

Leavemywife posted:

I'm sorry. I grabbed the Return to Arkham collection and I've been spending my nights terrifying thugs.

Which should count in its own way. It's still horror involved.

Watch your movies and reward yourself with Batman. alansmithee's already knocked out 1 of their 3, and you arguably got a better line-up than him.

Leavemywife
Feb 7, 2012

Taking the term "Koopaling" to a whole new level since 2016.


Grimey Drawer

The Brainiac

Holy poo poo, where do I begin talking about this movie? It was an interesting movie, definitely a product of 1961 horror. It had the cheap sets, the goofy looking monster, the questionable acting, and the goofy loving story lines that black and white horror had going for them, like Horror of Party Beach or Terror From The Year 5000. I bring up those movies not only because they fit the general time frame, but also because I could have easily seen The Brainiac as an episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000, except that this movie was in Spanish. Which really threw me off at first; I'm used to my silly horror movies being in English, thank you very much. At least, the Netflix version was in Spanish; there exists a dubbed English version, but no English option on Netflix.

Anyways, the story begins back in 1661, where Baron Bitelious, a sorcerer and witch, has been up to some shenanigans. He's had the poo poo tortured out of him by the Inquisition, not that its had any sort of lasting effect on him. He's simply used his magic to not let it bother him a bit, but he's eventually burned at the stake. However, while he's burning, he uses his powers to discover the identities of his enemies. A comet passes overhead and he promises them that, in 300 years, when the comet returns, so will he to wreak havoc on their descendants, ending their bloodlines.

And, guess what, 300 years pass and Baron comes back! A goddamned rock falls out of the sky one night, after two astronomers, Reynaldo and Victoria (I think. I'm bad at names when I only have subtitles to go by, which sounds really weird when I write it out, since you'd think that reading the name would imprint it in my memory better), discover the comet is back on its 300 year cycle. The Baron emerges from the rock, but as a horrible creature with fleshy pincers and a long forked tongue, as well as a hairy and pulsating face. It's the kind of thing that, on a TV screen, makes you snicker, but would probably horrify you in real life. Still, when in this form, the Baron can use his forked tongue to break through the back of the skull and drain your brains. This is very puzzling to the police, as they believe it to be some sort of drill, but as more bodies pile up, the Baron is slowly making good on his promise...

I'm honestly not sure what I felt about this movie. It definitely shows its age, which I have trouble knocking it for; it's a product of a different time, so it's very different from horror movies that come out today. The effects are laughable (I'm not entirely certain they weren't back then), the story is kind of thin, and the characters are slightly bland and boring. I liked the Baron, though, since he had class. Or something to that effect. Still, I wouldn't recommend you away from this movie; quite the opposite, in fact. I'd recommend gathering a group of friends, a few stiff drinks, and sitting down to enjoy The Brainiac, doing your best MST3K impressions.

I'm honestly not sure what kind of rating to give it. It wasn't a bad movie, not really. Like I said, it shows its age and it hasn't aged well, but that isn't the movie's fault. However, I'm hesitant to believe it was considered a masterpiece, by any stretch of the imagination, back in the early 60's. So, in the interest of being generous and trying to get others to watch it, I'm going to go ahead and give The Brainiac a solid 7/10.

I wasn't sure where else to work this in, but the movie ends with the police busting in to take out the Baron, in his monster form, with loving flamethrowers.

Neo Rasa
Mar 8, 2007
Everyone should play DUKE games.



The Braniac is so goofy, I loving love it. The same production company/people did another horror movie three years prior that's also on Netflix called The Vampire's Coffin. It's not as out there as The Braniac but check it out!

Franchescanado
Feb 23, 2013

If it wasn't for disappointment,
I wouldn't have any appointment.


Grimey Drawer

Vampire's Coffin is awesome.

Leavemywife
Feb 7, 2012

Taking the term "Koopaling" to a whole new level since 2016.


Grimey Drawer

Eyes Of My Mother

I just couldn't get into this movie. I tried, but it felt like a glaze kept slipping over my vision when I was watching it, even though it definitely felt like something I should like, should have engaged with.

It's the story of a young woman, Francisca, who's mother was murdered by a salesman, Charlie. Her father chains Chuck in the barn, where Fran blinds him and cuts out his vocal cords. She continues torturing him into adulthood, while he remains chained up.

Her father dies years later, then Fran meets Kimiko, a Japanese girl. Fran, trying to be friendly, opens up to Kimiko, revealing she murdered her father, and ends up murdering Kimiko, bagging her up and putting her in the fridge.

Franends up kidnapping a child, trapping his mother in the barn (having killed Chuck), and raising the boy as her own. Eventually, the mother escapes, is found by a trucker and the cops show up and that wraps up the movie.

It wasn't a bad movie, I don't think. I may not have been in the proper mood for it, or maybe it just isn't my kind of movie. It felt a little surreal watching it, like there was no surprise to this woman killing these various people. It felt like a foregone conclusion; we know Fran is hosed up and we'll see some very odd poo poo.

I want to like this movie, but I can't quite put my finger on why I don't. It's a sort of character study of a lonely woman who wants some friends, but due to the trauma of her early life, her relationships all end the same way, leading to this cycle of death that continues until her own demise. Or maybe it's the story of a psychopath who can't form lasting relationships due to her disturbed nature. Hell, it could be both.

In any case, I was not a fan. Eyes Of My Mother was not my jam, but I'd like to hear some other takes on it.

3/10.

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alansmithee
Jan 25, 2007

Goodness no, now that wouldn't do at all!


Grimey Drawer

Continuing my penance:

The Untold Story

The Untold Story is a Hong Kong movie "based on a true story". IT's about a guy Wong who flees Hong Kong to Macau after being wanted for murder. He takes up a job at a restaurant, gets caught cheating at Mah Jong, and kills the owner and the owner's family while taking over the restaurant. He then proceeds to kill any employee who starts to suspect anything about what he did. The second half of the movie finds him captured with the police trying to get a confession from him (as there's no evidence of his crimes due to his way of disposing the bodies).

So I'd actually seen this before a long time ago, and to be fair, it's not as bad as I remembered. However, that doesn't mean it's any good. It's a Category III movie, which in Hong Kong basically means hard R/NC-17. Basically, there's tons of gore and/or nudity. And this movie's no different. There's a fairly graphic surprise sex scene, and tons of grisly murders. However, the effects are somewhat tame in comparison to a lot of extreme horror. There's not much here to recommend to true gorehounds, although in terms of the average horror movie it's definitely a bit on the gory end.

And really, that's about all there would be to recommend about it. There's no real tension throughout, nothing really seems to bring about horror. It's also not interested in any sort of character study like Henry, Portrait of a Serial Killer that may give some depth to Wong. He's just a dude who kills people because the plot dictates it. The police are largely there for comedy relief (something I've noticed in many asian horror movies is the tendency to have comedic elements that border on slapstick), but they don't provide any real laughs (certainly not enough to recommend it as a horror comedy). And all around it's just a mean, dull movie. The second half with Wong in prison and the police trying to get a confession is nothing really more than one scene after another of Wong being beaten, tortured, or trying to mutilate himself somehow (to escape being prosecuted for his murders). When he finally confesses and tells how he killed the restaurant owner's family, there's almost no impact, just a feeling of relief that the movie is nearing it's end. The tone of a lot of the killing just seems to be off as well-everything's so ridiculous and over the top that it's hard to take serious, yet it's not over the top enough to actually be funny/entertaining.

I believe this film has (had?) some notoriety for being an example of "extreme asian" cinema (along with stuff like Riki-oh, and Audition, etc), but really there's much better examples if that's what someone is looking for. Cold Fish is about 10x the serial killer movie that this is, off the top of my head. I will say though that this was an extremely good choice for a punishment movie, so there's that at least going for it.

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