- Wise Learned Man
- Apr 22, 2008
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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Lipstick Apathy
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Apparently Goes had a brain bleed after that, which isn't surprising considering he's getting shunted out of the ring solely via getting kneed directly on the top of the head. It's like violent furniture rearranging
It's time.
quote:Lemme tell you a true story.
Back in early 2004, I was impersonating Wes Sims for a few months as part of a bet. So me and The Hammer, we're going to Ikea, cause he needs to buy a chair, right? Nothing fancy, just a simple office chair with good lumbar support, cause he'd hurt his back a little fighting Fedor. So we're in Ikea, looking through all the Bjorns and Karls and Fingords and whatever the gently caress else they call the loving furniture, and Coleman's hopping in and out of the little display models, stretching and going "UUUURGH" and all "I don't like this one, these arms are gonna piss me off if I buy this and stuff".
Eventually we settle on one, I forget which, and we go looking for a member of staff. We find one, pimply little motherfucker, and he's all "Uh I'll need to go get a forklift driver cause it's kinda heavy" and, well, Mark is obviously a strong dude and we don't wanna wait cause we gotta go get our Swedish Meatball on, so we go with this dude to the warehouse, and we're gonna carry the chair ourselves, y'know? And that's when it goes bad. Somewhere on the other side of the warehouse, some numbnuts drops something, BANG, just like that.
And Mark lets instinct take over.
First victim is the pimply kid, cause I'd gotten used to Coleman by this point and got a pallet jack between me and him as soon as I heard the bang. The kid, obviously not too wise on his PRIDE, takes it like a sandbag, straight down, his head hitting the concrete floor like a canteloupe. Pretty grody.
Mark realises what he's done, and obviously he's pretty stressed, and for some hosed up reason there's, like, sixty display chairs and tables set up in the warehouse, must be about to be taken out to the shop floor for a display, except he doesn't see that, he just sees a forest of legs, all of them in pairs. It was like watching a bull slew through a bunch of paraplegics, I tell you. He's just BAM, double leg, BAM, double leg, BAM, double leg, shouting and bellowing the whole way. He gasses after his first five or six, but keeps BAM double legging them, for a whole twenty minutes. Last thing I remember of that godawful carnage, as I booked it out of a back door and the cops arrive, is a mental image, startling in its clarity still, of Mark Coleman doing the whizzer on a BERTIL, his face as orange as Hell's own glow.
It took a few cops to bring him in, of course. Eventually one of them made sergeant by screaming "THIS IS K-1 RULES!" in his face and cuffing him while he was confused. The trial was called off when the jury all got mysteriously injured a few days before, and the judge didn't post his arm correctly and dislocated his elbow. The only reporter foolhardy enough to try and cover the story got as far as "Noted cage fighter Mark "The Hammer"" before getting double-legged right through his own desk. As for me? Well, I won my bet. Easiest sixteen bucks I ever made.
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May 4, 2017 08:19
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Apr 27, 2024 21:55
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- Wise Learned Man
- Apr 22, 2008
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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Lipstick Apathy
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I guess Weidman is taking the Arlovski route in his post-title career. The good news is he'll be back for a few cool slobberknockers after a couple of years in the B leagues.
e: looking at his record again I see his stretch of getting KO'd a bunch didn't occur immediately after losing the belt. I just misremembered it that way.
Wise Learned Man fucked around with this message at 01:08 on May 12, 2017
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May 12, 2017 01:06
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- Wise Learned Man
- Apr 22, 2008
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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Lipstick Apathy
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Alright, I try to keep the actual details of my actual life slightly obscured but I have enough friends on here that know me IRL a bit that it keeps me from becoming a complete character. This is important.
I have a relevant hard to obtain degree and I'm a genocide historian in his thirties. I've seen a lot of hosed up things through video before youtube and I've witnessed untimely death first hand many times. This is all that's relevant here.
A genetic passport, in it's phrasing, is precisely what leads nations to great evils. Any label you can put on someone can be used to exclude and remove people. Genetic passport is the same thought as eugenics and phrenology. Good and bad science questions used to create labels to exclude and eliminate. We live in a society where people revel in letting strangers see the inside of their apartment. We carrying around GPS trackers in our phones and leave them on ALL THE TIME. This may sound paranoid, but things like the holocaust as the most famous example happen fifteen years before bullets are fired. It's dangerous labeling of a concept that really shouldn't exist.
Or we're all gay people and microcosms of society don't exist in sports, whatever.
I just felt that's the first question you've ever asked me that was worth a real answer. Back to laughter please.
Please explain this further, because I can't see a connection between genocide and tracking some athletes' test results over time.
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May 12, 2017 02:34
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- Wise Learned Man
- Apr 22, 2008
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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Lipstick Apathy
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Anderson had that fight completely won and then walked away and refused to stop celebrating on top of the cage then refused to stop doing Wing Chun with his back to the cage in the next round
For being an all time great Anderson can be a loving moron
He was just doing his Palhares impression.
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May 14, 2017 01:51
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- Wise Learned Man
- Apr 22, 2008
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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Lipstick Apathy
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I suddenly want to see Gleison Tibau at LHW. He's the new Rumble.
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May 18, 2017 15:39
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Apr 27, 2024 21:55
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- Wise Learned Man
- Apr 22, 2008
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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Lipstick Apathy
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Max did way better against Conor
To be fair, didn't Conor tear his ACL in the first round of that one?
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May 30, 2017 18:16
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May 4, 2017 08:19
