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Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
UFC June: here's a little FYI.

Last month's thread is here. May had no real drama or idiocy from gimmick posters, unfortunately, for what are we in this game for if not to be entertained by idiots?

May brought us two cards, both of which were quite decent. The first expectedly so, the second surprisingly so.

Starting us off was UFC 211 from Dallas, Texas on the 13th. The main event brought us a rematch two and a half years in the making, with Baddest Man on the Planet Stipe Miocic looking to avenge his decision loss to Junior Dos Santos, this time with the Heavyweight Championship on the line. Avenge it he did, with the champion picking up his fourth consecutive first round finish, all four of them coming by way of his fists.
http://i.imgur.com/ZXiWWOY.mp4
Miocic also equalled the long-standing record of defenses by a Heavyweight champion (2). Not sure what's next for Miocic, but with a few younger up and coming fighters in the HW ranks (Lewis, Ngannou) we could see him finally break the curse that is Trashweight and have an actual title reign.

Also on this card was Women's Strawweight champion Joanna Jędrzejczyk taking a unanimous decision over Jéssica Andrade. Andrade was considered a decent chance, not nearly as much of an underdog as the champion's last few opponents, but even with the power of her hitting she essentially had nothing for the Polish buzzsaw. Joanna Champion extends her defense streak to 5, and remains undefeated in MMA.

Other fun fights from this card was Yair Rodriguez showing that he's not quite ready for the Featherweight big time, with Frankie Edgar messing up his eye socket in brutal fashion, handing Rodriguez only his second ever loss. Demian Maia took out Jorge Masvidal in a split decision and firmly established himself as the next Welterweight contender. And two complete nobodies brought us one of the brawls of the year, with Heavyweights Chase Sherman and Rashad Coulter smashing the poo poo out of each other for two and a bit rounds, ending with a savage standing elbow KO by Sherman. Both fighters received $50k bonuses for Fight of the Night, which is a life-changing amount of money for struggling single dad Coulter. Less fun was the No Contest ruling in the Eddie Alvarez/Dustin Poirier fight, with Alvarez ruled as having used illegal knees to prevent the other fighter from continuing.

Two weeks later, the UFC headed to Stockholm, Sweden for UFC Fight Night: Gustafsson vs. Teixeira. This card was not exactly highly regarded, with few well known names and a whole bunch of Eastern European unknowns. Turns out it was a fun night, with some great KOs in the preliminaries and main card. The main event saw an absolute slugfest between Alexander Gustafson and Glover Teixeira, with the latter absorbing spectacular amounts of punishment. As of the end of the fourth round, two judges had it sitting at 40-35 with the third making it 40-34. The fifth round saw Teixiera take three flush uppercuts on the jaw, then a savage right hook that finally puts Teixeira on the cavas for good.
http://i.imgur.com/ov32fzZ.mp4
And the crowd goes wild.

A major upset from this card saw Volkan Oezdimir knock Misha Cirkunov out in under 30 seconds, with a short right hand that landed flush on Cirkunov's brain as Cirkunov was hunting his opponent down and harrying him across the octagon.
http://i.imgur.com/w12AE0z.mp4
UFC events in June

June is a huge month for the UFC, followed up by an ever bigger month in July. We have a total of nine cards over the next 8 weeks.

First up is UFC 212 from Rio de Janeiro on the 3rd. The UFC hasn't been to Brazil for a PPV for over a year, and they've put up a really decent card for their return. Headlining is the unification bout between Jose Aldo(c) and Max Holloway(ic) for the Featherweight championship. Jose Aldo is in the conversation as the greatest MMA fighter of all time and is looking to continue his more than a decade of dominance that was only briefly derailed by a Mystic Mac left hook. Max Holloway put his name on the interim championship with authority in December 2016, when he dropped Anthony Pettis for his tenth consecutive win. This could be an incredible fight.

UFC 212 also brings us the ending of one of the most epic UFC runs of all time, with Vitor Belfort announcing that when he takes on Nate Marquadt in the Middleweight division, it will be his last for the promotion. His first UFC fight was in February 1997. He hasn't said the "r" word as far as I can tell, so I assume that win or lose he will show up in Rizin later this year, re-inflated.

Cláudia Gadelha (lost twice to JJ) also takes on Karolina Kowalkiewicz (lost twice to JJ) to see who can try to stake their claim as the best also-ran in the Women's Strawweight division.

The next week brings us UFC Fight Night: Lewis vs. Hunt on the 11th, from Auckalnd, New Zealand. The main event sees The Super Samoan Mark Hunt taking on Derrick "The Black Beast" Lewis as the former looks to steady himself in the waning years of his career, and the latter looks to claim his first scalp of a real contender. Lots of pundits have considered that Lewis' striking doesn't have the consistency and discipline to take on Hunt, and it remains to be seen what his chin is like, so this fight should answer a lot of questions for everyone. Other fights on this card see Derek "Knocked Out by Robert Whittaker, Psyched Out by Anderson Silva" Brunson taking on goon favourite Judo Dan Kelly, and Tim Elliott as a late-ish replacement for Joe Benevidez taking on Ben Nguyen.

The next week takes us to the Singapore Indoor Stadium for UFC Fight Night: Holm vs. Correia on the 17th. Holly Holm, former Women's Bantamweight champion and Women's Featherweight challenger takes on Women's Bantamweight challenger Bethe Correia in an... interesting fight. We last saw Holm taking on Germaine de Randamie for the women's 145 belt, and with Holm losing and then losing her appeal against losing, she's back at 135. Since losing to Ronda Rousey in August 2015, Correia has gone 1-1-1 and is hoping to put herself back on the championship map with this fight. The second main will bring us Andrei Arlovski trying to halt a four-fight skid against the up-and-coming Marcin Tybura, Dong Hyun Kim (no, not that one, the other one) taking on Colby Covington and Tarec Saffiedine squaring up with Rafael dos Anjos.

Finally, the 25th of the month brings us to June's last event, UFC Fight Night: Chiesa vs. Lee. The Lightweight division main event sees Michael Cheisa, who is on a three-fight winning streak looking to continue this against Kevin Lee whose streak currently stands at four. Tim Boetsch takes on Johny Hendricks at Middleweight, with Bigg Rigg still testing the waters at 185. BJ Penn is fighting as well, apparently, against the advice of all the brain doctors in the world, but I guess taking on Dennis Siver (2-3 in his last five) at Featherweight might not be quite as bad for him as getting his dome caved in by Yair Rodriguez was.

UFC News

Some actual news this month! The Bantamweight championship fight between Cody Garbrandt(c) and TJ Dillashaw, originally intended to headline UFC 213, has been cancelled due to the champion sustaining a back injury. This has been a recurring injury for Garbrandt and he is seeking stem cell therapy in Germany to deal with it. TJ Dillashaw has been linked to a fight with Demetrious Johnson for the Flyweight belt, with that deal yet to be made. Johnson is talking up wanting TJ to make weight and fight at least once at 125 before getting the championship fight.

The UFC Fighter's Retreat took place on the weekend of the 20th-21st May and brought with it some controversy. Angela Magana had been needling Cristiana Justino on twitter for weeks leading up to the event, and when they met in person, "Cyborg" allegedly punched Magana. Magana pressed charges and Justino has been cited for misdemeanor battery. UFC President Dana White has since stated that there is no place for violence outside the Octagon and that this was a simple case of assault, regardless of the build. Magana has since been kicked out of her gym. White's comments can be found in this episode of UFC Unfiltered. Other fallout from the retreat included Kajan Johnson protesting at the Reebok Fighter Outfitting session, after which the UFC had a sit down with disgruntled fighters to discuss sponsorship. Johnson expected to be fired after pointing out he lost as much as 80% of his sponsorship funds when the Reebok deal came in. For a larger rundown of the situation see the news story here.

In other "wtf were they thinking" new, UFC Women's Featherweight Champion Germaine de Randamie has stated that she plans on moving back down to Bantamweight. A lengthy social media post by her states that she sees Cristiane "Cyborg" Justino as a "proven cheater" and is not interested in facing her at any point in time in the future. She's certainly not wrong, but this move basically invalidates the entire point of the Women's 145 division. I for one fully support her decision and suggest that we all pretend UFC 208 never happened and that the W145 division just go away for ever.

In other news, Chris Camozzi's contract has expired and he is now a free agent. Hey, I know no-one cares, but at least it's news, right?

Your Current Champions

Men's Heavyweight Champion - Stipe Miocic (19-2)
Stipe Miocic won the Heavyweight title in May of 2016, stopping Fabricio Verdum in front of his countrymen in a single round. He backed this feat up with anotehr first-round stoppage of the most decorated Heavyweight of all time, Alistair Overeem, in Miocic's home town of Cleveland in September. It was considered that the winner of the fight between Werdum and Cain Velasquez at UFC 207, a rematch of the fight where Werdum took Velasquez' belt from him in 2015, would be Miocic's next opponent, but Velasquez was forced out of this bout with yet another leg injury. Miocic defended his title in May 2017, with yet another first round KO of his opponent, making Junior dos Santos his second scalp as champion and equalling the all-time title defenses record.


Men's Light Heavyweight Champion - Daniel Cormier (20-1)
Daniel Cormier won the belt initiall in May of 2015, winning against the heavy-hitting Anthony Johnson by rear-nake choke in the third round. Cormier defended his belt against Alexander Gustaffson in October of 2015 in a split decision. A planned rematch against Jon Jones was scheduled for UFC 200, which was called off after Jones tested positive for banned substances. Cormier went on to fight Anderson Silva in a non-title bout on three days' notice. Cormier was slated to fight Anthony Johnson in a rematch for the belt in December, a match which did not took place due to Cormier suffering a groin adductor injury. The bout took place at UFC 210 in April, with Cormier defending the belt in under two rounds and Johnson riding off into the sunset with a surprise retirement. The long-awaited rematch with Jones is slated for UFC 214 in late July. There's plenty of time for Jones to drink-drive into a pile of cocaine and strippers between now and then though, so don't hold your breath.


Men's Middleweight Champion - Michael Bisping (37-7)
Bisping had a fairytale year in 2016, first of all beating the greatest MMA striker of all time Anderson Silva in front of his hometown crowd of Manchester in February. Then, on 17 days notice, he stepped up to fight Luke Rockhold for the Middleweight Championship in June at UFC 199. Bisping joked about not having the regular time to get his cardio ready, meaning he would have to knock Rockhold out in the first round. Against the expectations of everyone everwhere, including his own son, he did exactly that. He capped off his year with a successful defense against Dan Henderson, putting the ghosts of UFC 100 to rest. A defense against Yoel Romero was initially slated, which was then changed to a match against a returning George St. Pierre, with both bouts put on hold due to Bisping suffering an injury in May. A match between Romero and Robert Whittaker at UFC 213 in July has been announced, which will be for an Interim Middleweight championship to lock in stone Bisping's next opponent.


Men's Welterweight Champion - Tyron Woodley (16-3-1)
Woodley was promised a title shot against the Welterweight champion 17 months before the fight took place. After Robbie Lawler put in Fight Of The Year performances against Rory MacDonald in July 2015 and Carlos Condit in January 2016, Woodley went into their fight in July of 2016 as a significant underdog. This meant nothing, with Lawler going down to strikes in the first round. Woodley defended his belt against Stephen "Wonderboy" Thompson, putting on an incredible fight that ended in a majority draw at UFC 205 in New York in November 2016. A rematch for this fight was held in March month at UFC 209, and it sucked out loud. Woodley announced in April that he has just started his training camp, aiming at a UFC 213 return, with no opponent announced.


Men's Lightweight Champion - Conor MacGregor (21-3)
Lightweight title might as well be vacant at this point in time because Conor is never going to defend the loving thing.


Men's Featherweight Champion - Jose Aldo Jr. (26-2)
Aldo spent the better part of a decade being an unstoppable force at Featherweight; first with the WEC where he won the title in November 2009, then in the UFC after the former was absorbed by them. This run was derailed by Conor McGregor in December 2015, where Aldo was knocked into unconsciousness 13 seconds into the first round. An opportunity came Aldo's way in July of 2016, with an Interim Championship fight against Frankie Edgar at UFC 200 seeing Aldo regaining gold again. With McGregor being stripped of the Featherweight Championship before UFC 206, and Max Holloway winning the Interim title at that event, Aldo was promoted to Featherweight Champion. These belts are due to be unified this weekend at UFC 212.


Men's Interim Featherweight Champion - Max Holloway (17-3)
Holloway put together a 9-fight win streak, with several Performance of the Night bonuses, before answering the call to contend for the Interim Featherweight Championship at UFC 206 in December 2016. Taking out Anthony Pettis with a body kick and punches late in the third round, he has set himself up for a unification bout against Jose Aldo this weekend at UFC 212.


Men's Bantamweight Champion - Cody Garbrandt (11-0)
After amassing a professional record of 5-0 in the minor leagues, Garbrandt was able to parley this into a UFC contract in January 2015. He then went on to win 5 fights in a row in the UFC, including going from unranked at Bantamweight at the start of 2016 into championship contention at the end. He took on Dominick Cruz for the title at UFC 207 in late December, and in contrast to analysis from a variety of sources, took out Cruz in a unanimous decision. Garbrandt was scheduled to take on TJ Dillashaw at UFC 213 in July, to cap off the current season of The Ultimate Fighter, which has now been cancelled due to a back injury sustained by the champion.


Men's Flyweight Champion - Demetrious Johnson (26-2-1)
After winning the Flyweight Championship in September 2012 in a split decision against Joseph Benevidez, Johnson has amassed a 9-fight streak against the best that the division has had to offer. He has been so dominant that the UFC held an entire Ultimate Figher tournament to find his next challenger. The culmination of this was that Tim Elliott came back out of the MMA wilderness to lose a competitive match against Johnson in early December 2016. Johnson easily defended his title against Wilson Reis in April, tying the all-time title defense record held by Anderson Silva. His next fight is slated to be against TJ Dillashaw for the title, and Johnson indicating he would like TJ to take a fight at 125 and win before taking on the champion


Women's Featherweight Champion - Germaine de Randamie(7-3)
In order to answer a question a grand total of about seven people outside Brazil were asking, the UFC set up a fight between Holly Holm and Germaine de Randamie for UFC 208 in February of this year. With de Randamie winning in contentious fashion, and Holm unsuccessfully appealing the outcome, the new champion is probably going to defend it against Cristiane Justino Venâncio aka Cyborg at some point in time in the future. Assuming Cyborg can keep off the drugs or out of jail, or that anyone cares. May brought the news that de Randamie is looking to move back to Bantamweight, hopefully bringing an end to the failed experiment that is Women's Featherweight in the UFC.


Women's Bantamweight Champion - Amanda Nunes (14-4)
Nunes headlined UFC 200 in July of 2016, putting a vicious beating on Miesha Tate and securing a rear-nake choke victory in a little over three minutes. She backed this up with a brutal 48-second TKO victory against former Women's Bantamweight Champion and WMMA pioneer Rounda Rousey in late December 2016. Nunes is currently slated to take on Valentina Shevchenko in a rematch of their March 2016 fight, a match which will headline UFC 213 in July.


Women's Strawweight Champion - Joanna Jędrzejczyk (13-0)
After winning the Women's Strawweight Championship against the one-dimensional Carla Esparza in March 2015, Jędrzejczyk has defended her title four times. Most recent of these was against her Polish countrywoman Karolina Kowalkiewicz at UFC 205 in November 2016. Jędrzejczyk successfully defended her belt against Jessica Andrade at UFC 211 in May.

Other poo poo

Thanks very much to LobsterMobster for putting together the awards thread for last year:

2016 Rowdy Ringsports MMA Awards - RESULTS THREAD!.

Thanks also go to LobsterMobster for putting together both iterations of the UFC Fightpass Thread

UFC Fight Pass Playlists and Collections

The NEW UFC Fight Pass Collection Thread


Go to the MMA's Best and Worst of the Year, 2017 thread to keep up with what has been considered by your fellow PSP-MMA posters as the best (and worst) of the UFC.

More thanks go out to Unfunny Poster for putting together a new UFC Fight Pass Thread - Earning Your 3rd Degree Blackbelt In MMA Posting. This thread is being updated approximately every week with information on new and upcoming additions to the streaming service, and is good for general banter about old fights. June's UFC Fight Pass Match of the Month is three rounds of absolute madness from Cub Swanson vs. Doo Ho Choi from UFC 206 last December.


As usual, let me know where I hosed something up, and you too could win the No-Prize!

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Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
https://twitter.com/ChrisCamozzi/status/870412663561506816

lol

Lid
Feb 18, 2005

And the mercy seat is awaiting,
And I think my head is burning,
And in a way I'm yearning,
To be done with all this measuring of proof.
An eye for an eye
And a tooth for a tooth,
And anyway I told the truth,
And I'm not afraid to die.
he will always be remembered for his fight with Mighty Mouse

kensei
Dec 27, 2007

He has come home, where he belongs. The Ancient Mariner returns to lead his first team to glory, forever and ever. Amen!


Yay my title was used and I didn't even have to make the drat thread :lol:

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
So my process for getting some of those gifs up there to embed was:

- find a tweet with a gif OR find an oddshot/streamable link from reddit
- find a shady "download video" website and download them
- upload the resulting mp4 to youtube
- use imgur.com/vidgif to convert them to something that will autoplay on the forums
- delete the private video off youtube

Not good enough, says youtube's auto content ID system!



I'm sure there's an easier way to do this and I'm just being a doofus about it.

edit: Also, Embedded 4 is up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5kI1HsfF31A

Memento fucked around with this message at 03:53 on Jun 2, 2017

Dr. Abysmal
Feb 17, 2010

We're all doomed
Rashad vs. Sam Alvey for the Fight Night card in Mexico City in August, that fight's got stinker written all over it

Looten Plunder
Jul 11, 2006
Grimey Drawer

Memento posted:

So my process for getting some of those gifs up there to embed was:

The UFC still finds your poo poo even if it's a gif of their content uploaded to youtube? Holy poo poo.

Fat Twitter Man
Jan 24, 2007

by R. Guyovich

Dr. Abysmal posted:

Rashad vs. Sam Alvey for the Fight Night card in Mexico City in August, that fight's got stinker written all over it

Alvey is a southpaw, so he's going to win

Josuke Higashikata
Mar 7, 2013


Memento posted:

So my process for getting some of those gifs up there to embed was:

- find a tweet with a gif OR find an oddshot/streamable link from reddit
- find a shady "download video" website and download them
- upload the resulting mp4 to youtube
- use imgur.com/vidgif to convert them to something that will autoplay on the forums
- delete the private video off youtube

Not good enough, says youtube's auto content ID system!



I'm sure there's an easier way to do this and I'm just being a doofus about it.

edit: Also, Embedded 4 is up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5kI1HsfF31A

Gifs are old and busted.
Make WebMs with "WebM for Retards" (this is the actual name of the program)
https://gitgud.io/nixx/WebMConverter

It's a piece of piss and WebM's are better quality image, better framerate and smaller filesize. They embed for me just by posting the URL in the reply box, though that could be a SALR feature.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Lid posted:

he will always be remembered for his fight with Mighty Mouse

That's Chris Cariaso. And yes, I did have to check to see which forgettable fighter I was thinking of.

I.N.R.I
May 26, 2011
sam alvey really bothers me for some reason

click here http://i.imgur.com/5lLGZOG.jpg

hes like one of those early scenes in a horror movie or something where everythings like still reasonably normal seeming but u can just tell theres something super hosed up going on beneath the surface. this is just a tentative theory of mine but i think he likes to buy dozens of raw chickens from the store all at once and then arranges them into biblical scenes in his basement

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Josuke Higashikata posted:

Gifs are old and busted.
Make WebMs with "WebM for Retards" (this is the actual name of the program)
https://gitgud.io/nixx/WebMConverter

It's a piece of piss and WebM's are better quality image, better framerate and smaller filesize. They embed for me just by posting the URL in the reply box, though that could be a SALR feature.

gently caress yes this is what I needed

Josuke Higashakatagatiki for thread mvp

Lid
Feb 18, 2005

And the mercy seat is awaiting,
And I think my head is burning,
And in a way I'm yearning,
To be done with all this measuring of proof.
An eye for an eye
And a tooth for a tooth,
And anyway I told the truth,
And I'm not afraid to die.

Snowman_McK posted:

That's Chris Cariaso. And yes, I did have to check to see which forgettable fighter I was thinking of.

:thejoke:

SquirrelGrip
Jul 4, 2012

I.N.R.I posted:

sam alvey really bothers me for some reason

click here http://i.imgur.com/5lLGZOG.jpg

hes like one of those early scenes in a horror movie or something where everythings like still reasonably normal seeming but u can just tell theres something super hosed up going on beneath the surface. this is just a tentative theory of mine but i think he likes to buy dozens of raw chickens from the store all at once and then arranges them into biblical scenes in his basement

I like his smile

Marching Powder
Mar 8, 2008



stop the fucking fight, cornerman, your dude is fucking done and is about to be killed.
i think he's dealing with pressure and uncertainty with an optimistic outlook and a winning smile. doesn't matter if the smile in question says 'you hosed my girlfriend? that's...... cool' more than 'i'm happy' because i get the feeling that he'd rather be nice to everyone than kill them despite inhabiting a body with the skilset to make him perfectly capable of the latter.

that fight with rashad will be the worst fight on that card.

Lid
Feb 18, 2005

And the mercy seat is awaiting,
And I think my head is burning,
And in a way I'm yearning,
To be done with all this measuring of proof.
An eye for an eye
And a tooth for a tooth,
And anyway I told the truth,
And I'm not afraid to die.
Just noticed OP says Rounda Rousey

Noice

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
I copied it out of last month's OP so it said it then as well.


noice

edit:

Gay Horney posted:

I'm going to post "sleepy miocic" when jds knocks him out

lol

Memento fucked around with this message at 11:14 on Jun 2, 2017

FishBowlRobot
Mar 21, 2006



Could just be Dana talk, but on the Unfiltered podcast he claims that Vitor still has one more fight on his contract after this one.

Josuke Higashikata
Mar 7, 2013


Memento posted:

Josuke Higashakatagatiki for thread mvp

let's not go ott here

Auron
Jan 10, 2002
<img alt="" border="0" src="https://fi.somethingawful.com/customtitles/title-auron.jpg"/><br/>Drunken Robot Rage

FishBowlRobot posted:

Could just be Dana talk, but on the Unfiltered podcast he claims that Vitor still has one more fight on his contract after this one.

This would be hilarious, thought not surprising as Vitor is kind of dumb.

Shirkelton
Apr 6, 2009

I'm not loyal to anything, General... except the dream.
Robin Black better be as stupid as he looks, because I hope this is wrong.

https://twitter.com/robinblackmma/status/870596440137117696

DrBrezo
May 13, 2009

Dan Didio posted:

Robin Black better be as stupid as he looks, because I hope this is wrong.

https://twitter.com/robinblackmma/status/870596440137117696

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. gently caress. This is one of the few fights coming up that i was super stoked for, hopefully its not a long layoff

The Dave
Sep 9, 2003

Just remember Vitor is coming off of a No contest, not a loss, because of weeeeeeeed.

El Roncho
Oct 15, 2006

I'm not necessarily proud of this but I'm gonna leave it here anyways.

The Dave posted:

Just remember Vitor is coming off of a No contest, not a loss, because of weeeeeeeed.

The memory loss caused by marijuana extends to no one remembering the results of fights. Makes sense in a way.

manyak
Jan 26, 2006

I.N.R.I posted:

sam alvey really bothers me for some reason

click here http://i.imgur.com/5lLGZOG.jpg

hes like one of those early scenes in a horror movie or something where everythings like still reasonably normal seeming but u can just tell theres something super hosed up going on beneath the surface. this is just a tentative theory of mine but i think he likes to buy dozens of raw chickens from the store all at once and then arranges them into biblical scenes in his basement

lol

handsome only face
Apr 22, 2010

Cockroach went out of the room in anger. And roach's go to empty room...

Cockroache's Anarchist


I.N.R.I posted:

sam alvey really bothers me for some reason

click here http://i.imgur.com/5lLGZOG.jpg

hes like one of those early scenes in a horror movie or something where everythings like still reasonably normal seeming but u can just tell theres something super hosed up going on beneath the surface. this is just a tentative theory of mine but i think he likes to buy dozens of raw chickens from the store all at once and then arranges them into biblical scenes in his basement

Josuke Higashikata
Mar 7, 2013


karolina kowalkiewicz better win so she can have kookies again

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"
text message excerpts from the hunt/ufc suit

https://twitter.com/bokamotoESPN/status/870656337906065412

"comical emoticon/emoji face" and "USADA is testing the poo poo out of him" are good lines

mewse
May 2, 2006

Lol he's going after them for RICO violations? Gangster

Josuke Higashikata
Mar 7, 2013


Hunt owns.

The Dave
Sep 9, 2003

"WHITE's assertion was false"

Could be the thread title for any given month.

Soothing Vapors
Mar 26, 2006

Associate Justice Lena "Kegels" Dunham: An uncool thought to have: 'is that guy walking in the dark behind me a rapist? Never mind, he's Asian.
I love that Dana's up and spinning lies at 3:22 AM

edit: time zones tho

Gay Horney
Feb 10, 2013

by Reene
Can you sue someone for Rico? I thought that was a criminal thing. Source: The Dark Knight

Skip My Posts
Aug 15, 2005

by FactsAreUseless

I.N.R.I posted:

sam alvey really bothers me for some reason

click here http://i.imgur.com/5lLGZOG.jpg

hes like one of those early scenes in a horror movie or something where everythings like still reasonably normal seeming but u can just tell theres something super hosed up going on beneath the surface. this is just a tentative theory of mine but i think he likes to buy dozens of raw chickens from the store all at once and then arranges them into biblical scenes in his basement

Lol

mewse
May 2, 2006

Gay Horney posted:

Can you sue someone for Rico? I thought that was a criminal thing. Source: The Dark Knight

IANAL:

If it's a civil suit for fraud or whatever, proving that criminal activity led to the damages would bolster their case. Dana's not being charged under RICO, they're alleging that he was participating in a RICO level criminal conspiracy.

Work Friend Keven
Oct 24, 2015

I'M A BIG STUPID IDIOT WHO GETS TRIGGERED FROM THE WORDS SPORTS BALL AND HAS SHIT OPINIONS ABOUT CARD GAMES. ALSO I SAID I WAS GOING TO QUIT HEARTHSTONE OUT OF SPITE OF A TAIWANESE WINNING THE CHAMPIONSHIP SO REPORT ME IF YOU SEE ME POST IN A HS THREAD
The purpose of that conspiracy? To make mark hunt tip over very easily.

Patrick Spens
Jul 21, 2006

"Every quarterback says they've got guts, But how many have actually seen 'em?"
Pillbug

Gay Horney posted:

Can you sue someone for Rico? I thought that was a criminal thing. Source: The Dark Knight

According to Internet Lawyer Ken White, you can but you really really shouldn't.

Skip My Posts
Aug 15, 2005

by FactsAreUseless

Patrick Spens posted:

According to Internet Lawyer Ken White, you can but you really really shouldn't.

that guy writes very obnoxiously

Triticum Guzzler
Jun 16, 2002
i hope tkz didn't gently caress up his shoulder again

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threeagainstfour
Jun 27, 2005


Josuke Higashikata posted:

karolina kowalkiewicz better win so she can have kookies again

Has she ever had to deal with someone like Claudia trying to take her down? Claudia was able to get JJ down and keep there early in their rematch and if she can do that to JJ I feel like Claudia is gonna take Karolina down and either dominate her the entire fight, or finish her.

threeagainstfour fucked around with this message at 23:23 on Jun 2, 2017

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