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Tunicate
May 15, 2012


TL;DR unpaid interns are only fine so long as the work they do provides no (or negative) benefit whatsoever to the employer.

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Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Sandwich Anarchist posted:

Hey new guy, can you butcher fish? Really? Great, break down this sword for me.



It's an easy mistake to make. English is SUCH an ambiguous language.

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Discendo Vox posted:

How can I report places that are doing this to the police in a way that leads to their closure?

Doesn't the IRS offer a cut of the evaded taxes if you give them credible information about it?

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Crazy Larry posted:

If they do I'm going to guess that "I had brunch at a restaurant with more employees than customers and some randos on SA told me that means they're money laundering" falls short of the criteria for credible information.

Probably yeah. Time to go through their trash and get shot

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Mezzanon posted:

About six months ago we had a table come in, and as soon as they sat down the mother hands over a printed sheet of paper, and says "this is my sons food restrictions, what can we get here?"

Anaphylaxis

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Willie Tomg posted:

i defy you to care for chickens for more than a week and think of a better descriptor for them than "pampered asshats"

Entitled dinosaurs

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Errant Gin Monks posted:

I'm pretty sure it's more of a "we add this charge to ensure our employees have health insurance. If you are an utter piece of poo poo you can have this removed."

I liked it.

And why not just increase the price presented to the customer by 5%, instead of lying about how much it costs and springing an extra charge on the end?

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Skwirl posted:

That's not what happened in Seattle, Oakland or SF.

https://fivethirtyeight.com/features/seattles-minimum-wage-hike-may-have-gone-too-far/

Seattle isn't really clear cut on whether it actually worked.

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Shooting Blanks posted:

There's an app for it, the problem is that it isn't good enough to just know the fish, it's important how and where it was caught and 99% of the time the restaurant won't know.

also if they claim they do know, they're probably lying

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Field Mousepad posted:

You have a fish cook? Like one person that only cooks fish?

no he's got a cook who is literally a fish

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Liquid Communism posted:

Jesus christ, that is going to be some dark poo poo.

Thrift, thrift, Horatio

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Suspect Bucket posted:

I heartily disagree. If I see sweet potato fries on a menu, I'm ordering them, even if they're extra.

maybe he's only had them at those places that cover sweet potato fries in sugar?

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Discendo Vox posted:

I'm working on an effortpost for the psuedoscience thread about how Panera are secretly The Devil (well, only sort of, but their "clean food" marketing is really harmful to consumer understanding of nutrition and health, and they're exploiting it to the hilt).

The part where they claim that cysteine is made from human hair, and that it's in other company's food but not theirs, is particularly heinous.

Luv2Cannibal

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

JacquelineDempsey posted:

Yeah, I was already disgusted, but then I got to the part you quoted and literally shouted "oh what the holy gently caress" at my monitor.

I really hope that when they win their suit, a judge will find a way to expunge those records. That's gotta be stupid crazy illegal, sending a corporate atty to plead guilty on their behalf without their knowledge/consent, right? Right? (somebody please tell me I'm right, I was having such a good day)

If it doesn't, the staff can just have a lawyer represent the company and plead guilty

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Suspect Bucket posted:

I just thought it was because lime tastes hella good

btw addicted to limes now, will just straight up lick them for that good good lime sauce

just a FYI lime juice is like anti-sunscreen and if you get it on your skin and go outside you will burn up like a vampire

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

What's the worst corporate-mandated script you've encountered? Just ate at a place that made the waiters ask "have we dined with us before" and man who even comes up with this crap

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

virinvictus posted:

We just had our walk-in crap out and I had to throw out over 3,000 chicken wings. Worst part: one of my fellow managers tried to tell me that we could cook off the wings that smell like putrid death and it probably won’t make people sick.

I just stared while I gagged and threw out almost 40 cases of chicken.

Just tell the manager you'll look the other way if he wants to take them home.

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Accuracy doesn't matter? Sounds like an AI which generated plausible restaurant names and menus could be worth a lot to the right person :thunk:

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Schneider Inside Her posted:

Maybe you could put a texmex spin on Japanese classics. Like a sushi roll but instead of seaweed use a flour tortilla and instead of nasty old raw fish use like ground beef flavoured with coriander, cumin and chili

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3hFwPmQqSsU

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

The Maestro posted:

That’s pretty terrible logic. Just because it’s not the most plastic waste in the ocean means we shouldn’t bother trying to reduce it?

Greenwashing can easily displace effective efforts

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

JacquelineDempsey posted:

Meanwhile, I'm spending my own money buying peelers for the crew with my whopping $3/week raise because ours broke and the KM refuses to buy new ones --- "y'all need to develop knife skills anyways." That may be true, but if the reason I can't get a real raise is because our labor cost is so high, maybe invest a couple bucks in peelers and we wouldn't spend so much goddamn time peeling 75 pounds of apples with lovely paring knives? A couple bucks on peelers < paying 3 people $9 an hour to get those loving apples done, jeez, I'm not a loving mathemagician or anything but that makes no loving sense


Looks like your KM managed to pay for neither the peelers nor the additional labor. He got what he wanted.

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

If you aren't stealing from work you are stealing from your family

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Catfishenfuego posted:

I literally heard the phrase 'after three months probationary period we can pay you living wage' said by a person who didn't even pause to examine the words that came out of their mouth and I'm applying for 3 more marketing jobs tomorrow.

Just rent out your beach house, what's the big deal

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

The Maestro posted:

giving him good service so he comes back and keeps spending money.

dude if it's about wanting to trade your labor for money, why are you giving this guy valuable extra service for free? You could get a few extra hundo outta this situation, easy

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Mezzanon posted:

who says he's not getting tipped hundos for being a discreet and charming bartender at an upscale and elite location?

hey, the more money a guy has, the more valuable the confidentiality is to him.

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Hauki posted:

trump doesn't seem to value confidentiality much :thunk:

how much did he pay the national enquirer to kill those stories?

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Its a strategy that absolutely works, so long ad you have the accountants and lawyers necessary to turn the case into a legal snarl that the IRS doesnt want to spend the time dealing with

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

pile of brown posted:

gently caress doordash. They somehow added our cafe to their site and started taking orders and charging people when we don't even have their loving terminal here. Drivers started showing up for orders we'd never received, and customers including the loving city council called me irate and demanding refunds of money we'd never even seen.

Then personally I used doordash to order some food because the only good ramen place doesn't do ubereats, they accepted my order, gave me an ETA of an hour (long time but gently caress it I was hungover and not doing anything) 55 minutes later my order is cancelled without explanation and I get a notice that my money for the order will be returned in 5-7 days and now it's 9pm and everything in my town is closed. gently caress doordash.

Make some fake menus with the city council address and phone number, wait for doordash to scrape them.

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

If the pay isn't high enough to motivate workers to routinely exchange their labor for it, maybe the pay is too low? :thunk:

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Mithross posted:

There just aren’t enough cooks in the area, pretty much every local place is constantly trying to fill at least one hole.

only the ones that get down

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

who?

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Liquid Communism posted:

San Francisco also keeps bemoaning the difficulty of getting good help when nobody making under six figures can even afford to rent in the city anymore. But God forbid they fight the NIMBY lobby and build more dense housing.

Tunicate fucked around with this message at 16:50 on May 24, 2019

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Sandwich Anarchist posted:

My company just won a huge bid for a set of new culinary properties in our airport, it is unreal how much we are about to expand. I'm up for the culinary directorship for our entire set of holdings in this airport. I'm loving stoked y'all.

that's great. I'm still kinda amazed how airports now have decent restaurants in them now, it used to be the best option was always a chili's to go if you were lucky

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Sandwich Anarchist posted:

Yeah, and how many places close a year?

Not significantly more than any other small business

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Find evidence of the tax fraud, report it to the irs, and they have a finders fee

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

those checks are gonna bounce

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

pentyne posted:

I don't know if this is too morbid or depressing but has anyone had a favorite restaurant or place that ending up failing through no actual faults on the business side?


Does 'the business side' include 'corporate sold off the brand and the company they sold it to decided to close down every location' because that happened to a good burrito place in my college town. All the employees came in that morning and there were lawyers there saying 'hey you don't have a job anymore'.

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

SHVPS4DETH posted:

no one in any foh i’ve ever worked with has this skill

also they’re called “guests” thanks in advance

I overheard the owner of my local pizzeria chiding a worker for going across the street to the grocery store to get alfredo sauce for a customer. "If we don't have it we don't have it! Say no!"

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

I always tip 0% through grubhub/doordash's online thing, then leave a note with cash on the doorstep because those platforms "don't" steal tips, they just deduct an amount equal to the tips drivers receive from their pay.

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Tunicate
May 15, 2012

Just have one thing available at a time. Yell it at the customer when they enter, they can take it or leave it.

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