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Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
UFC August: The Return of The King* Drug Tests Pending

Last month's thread is here. July's big theme was everyone expecting Jon Jones to drink drive into a pile of hookers while doing lines of blow off a stripper's rear end, and then... he actually behaved himself.

A month huge in its intensity, Joe, was July. Five cards, with each one bringing its share of surprises, disappointments and good old fashion sanctioned violence.

Starting us off was The Ultimate Fighter 25 Finale from Las Vegas on the 7th of July. This fight was built up as the UFC debut of promotional newcomer Justin Gaethje (GAY-chi), the undefeated WSOF Lightweight champion. Taking on Michael Johnson, the two had a serious shootout with Gaethje being rocked a few times in the first and coming back in the second to take Johnson out with punches and knees. An excellent fight, check it out on fightpass if you haven't already.

The co-man was Jesse Taylor vs. Dhiego Lima in the TUF finale fight. Taylor was set to fight in the final of TUF 7 all the way back in 2008, but an alcohol-fueled rampage ended his UFC dream back then. In 2017, it only took him a round and 43 seconds for his superior wrestling and enormous strength advantage to see off Lima by rear-naked choke, and for his redemption arc to be complete.

The next night, Las Vegas again saw the T-Mobile arena bring us the action of UFC 213. In the leadup to this card, the main event changed several times. Initially slated for Cody Garbrandt's initial Bantamweight championship defense against his opposition TUF coach TJ Dillashaw, Garbrandt had to pull out in May with a recurring back injury. Then the main event was switched to be Amanda Nunes' second title defense, this time against Kyrgyzstani Muay Thai fighter Valentina Shevchenko. Nunes was forced to withdraw from the card the day before, citing a severe bout of sinusitis. The main event then defaulted to the Interim Middleweight championship match between Yoel Romero and Robert Whittaker. The main event was an excellent fight, going the distance and seeing Whittaker crowned the first UFC champion of any sort from Australia. After sustaining a knee injury shortly into the first round, Whittaker was still able to neutralise the takedowns of his Olympic silver medalist opponent, and pepper his opponent with high kicks and punches to take the fight on all three judges' scorecards 48-47.

In an excellent showing from the 63-fight heavyweight veteran, Oleksiy Oliynyk choked out Travis Browne in the second round of their match-up. Browne is currently sitting on a four-fight losing streak and surely pondering his future with the recent news.

The third card of the month again saw the UFC head overseas, with UFC Fight Night: Nelson vs. Ponzinibbio coming live from Glasgow, Scotland on the 16th. In the main event, Santiago Ponzinibbio, who is a real person with a real name, met Gunnar Nelson at Welterweight. The Argentinian fighter made short work of Nelson, knocking him out with 1:22 on the clock. Afterwards, Nelson complained that there was an eye-poke that the referee didn't catch, and that when he was knocked out he was seeing double.

Khalil Rountree continued to show improvement over his tepid, listless loss in the TUF final in July 2016. This time he made it a bell-beating KO of local favourite Paul Craig in the first round of their Light Heavyweight matchup.

The fourth card of this fight-filled month took place in Long Island, New York, with UFC on Fox: Weidman vs. Gastelum coming to us on the 22nd. The main event saw Kelvin Gastelum taking on the local favourite, former Middleweight champion Chris Weidman. Gastelum was looking to get his derailed Middleweight campaign back on track after testing positive to marijuana metabolites in-competition after his win over Vitor Belfort in March, which was then overturned to a No Contest. Weidman was looking to get any manner of win, after succumbing to three KO/TKO losses in a row. Weidman got the better of his opponent, sinking in an arm-triangle choke late in the third round and getting himself back in the winner's circle.

An enjoyable Heavyweight brawl was one of the highlights of this card, with Junior Albini making his UFC debut in fine form. He knocked out Timothy Johnson in slightly under three minutes and earned himself the biggest payday of his career to date, with a $50,000 Fight of the Night bonus coming his way.

Rounding off the month was the UFC card everyone had been waiting for. With the biggest potential for shenanigans and fuckery, UFC 214 took place on July 29th from Anaheim California. This card was slated as early as May of 2017 to be the return of Jon Jones, the former Light Heavyweight champion and widely considered pound-for-pound greatest fighter in the world. Having never lost his championship in the ring - instead, having it stripped once for his involvement in a felony hit-and-run, and again for testing positive to performance enhancing drugs - Jones stepped into the octagon for the first time since April 2016 expected to take back what many saw as rightfully his. His opponent, Daniel Cormier, had beaten Anthony Johnson twice, Alexander Gustaffson and one of the greatest of all time Anderson Silva in the time since last fighting Jones. While he is one of the greatest MMA fighters in the world, Cormier simply couldn't overcome the reach and striking advantage Jones holds over him. After the second round, the judges had scored the fight 19-19, 19-19 and 20-18 (to Jones), but Cormier was tiring from constant attacks to the body by the longer man. Jones needed slightly over three minutes of the third round to herd Cormier into a brutal high kick to the head, sending Cormier reeling. Jones went in for the kill and the referee John McCarthy waved off the fight to the roars of the crowd. Jones had once again climbed to the summit of the mixed martial arts world.

Two other championship fights took place on this card as well. Tyron Woodley successfully defended his Welterweight championship against Demian Maia, shutting down 22 out of 22 of the Brazilian's takedown attempts while content to pepper his opponent with strikes. Cristiane Justino and Tonya Evinger contested the Women's Featherweight championship, with Justino delivering brutal knees to her opponent early in the third round to get the TKO finish. In a quick and brutal upset, Volkan Oezdimir needed only 42 seconds to knock out Jimi Manuwa, and this card also saw the return of Robbie Lawler, taking a close decision victory in an excellent fight against Donald Cerrone.


UFC events in August

After the high that was the UFC in July, traditionally their biggest month of the year, we have the very, very low low of August. This month we only have a single card, with UFC Fight Night: Pettis vs. Moreno coming to us from Mexico City on the 5th. This card is notable that for the first time ever, as far as I know, a fight on the main card is being contested between two fighters without wikipedia pages. The main event sees Sergio Pettis look to continue his win streak, currently sitting on three, and Brandon Moreno looking to extend his streak to twelve. Randa Markos is also taking on Alexa Grasso in the co-main, with the latter trying to elbow her way into the Women's Strawweight rankings.

UFC News

The month of July brought us some interesting news from several fronts.

Around the 10th of July, rumours started flying about a Middleweight contender being released. It was confirmed shortly after that the UFC declined to meet Gegard Mousassi's pay demands, and allowed him to be signed by Bellator to a six-fight deal. He announced that his goal would be to become Bellator Middleweight champion and then hunt down the Light Heavyweight belt as well.

Further rumour-mongering took place in regards to the next set of coaches for The Ultimate Fighter 26. The 12th of July saw the confirmation that the two coaches would be the former UFC Lightweight champion Eddie Alvarez, and the former WSOF Lightweight champion, the undefeated Justin Gaethje. This season of TUF will be to kick off the Women's Flyweight division, and the two coaches are scheduled to meet in the finale on December 1st. With the extended medical suspension that Gaethje must serve after his war with Michael Johnson, this could be the best option to keep him in the public eye.

The premier of the first new UFC* show in a very long time took place in July, with the 11th seeing the first episode of Dana White's Tuesday Night Contender Series. This has been bringing us 5 fights each week since beginning, and so far has seen seven fighters signed to multi-fight contracts with the UFC. Unlike The Ultimate Fighter, these events count as professional fights on the fighter's MMA records, with the fighters signed to one-off $5k/$5k contracts for these fights. A true revelation from this show has been the advent of the Snoopcast, an alternate commentary track featuring Snoop Dogg and Uriah Faber.

*The show isn't actually administered by the UFC, as Dana White applied for and received a separate MMA promoter's license to run it. However, it's run by the UFC president, in the UFC gym and broadcast on UFC network.

Later in the month, the Association of Boxing Commissions approved four new weight classes in MMA. These are Super Lighweight (165lbs), Super Welterweight (175lbs), Super Middleweight (195lbs) and Cruiserweight (225lbs). At this stage there are no plans for the UFC to adopt these new weight clasese. The ABC also unanimously approved four new recommendations from their MMA rules committee - TKO by medical stoppage if a fighter loses control of a bodily function, more strict parameters for using instant replay, limitations on taping of hands before a fight and limitations on the type and place of athletic support that can be used on a fighter's body.

Lastly in July, we had a rumour that was denied then all-but-confirmed and remains up in the air. Apparently Brock Lesnar has re-entered the USADA testing pool, and is aiming for a return in a superfight against Jon Jones in Summer of next year. At this stage, like everything in the world of sport that is a year away, nothing is confirmed and the situation remains fluid.

Other news from July is that Dana White thinks that both Nick Diaz and Ronda Rousey are done with fighting. Assuming this is true, the future of heavyweight Travis Browne could be in jeopardy, at least in relation to the UFC. Dana also ranted to the press about the quality of the Tyron Woodley championship defense at UFC 214, saying that as the result of this the return match of Georges St. Pierre was definitely not going to Woodley any more.


Your Current Champions

Men's Heavyweight Champion - Stipe Miocic (19-2)
Stipe Miocic won the Heavyweight title in May of 2016, stopping Fabricio Verdum in front of his countrymen in a single round. He backed this feat up with anotehr first-round stoppage of the most decorated Heavyweight of all time, Alistair Overeem, in Miocic's home town of Cleveland in September. It was considered that the winner of the fight between Werdum and Cain Velasquez at UFC 207, a rematch of the fight where Werdum took Velasquez' belt from him in 2015, would be Miocic's next opponent, but Velasquez was forced out of this bout with yet another leg injury. Miocic defended his title in May 2017, with yet another first round KO of his opponent, making Junior dos Santos his second scalp as champion and equalling the all-time title defenses record.


Men's Light Heavyweight Champion - Jon Jones(24-1)
Jones' long road to redemption finally wound its way to his goal this past weekend when he kept it together long enough outside the octagon to get it together inside the octagon, and knock out former champion Daniel Cormier in the 3rd round. With the fight taking place mere days ago, no opponent for the championship is currently announced, but Jones has called out Brock Lesnar for a superfight at some unspecified time in the future.


Men's Middleweight Champion - Michael Bisping (37-7)
Bisping had a fairytale year in 2016, first of all beating the greatest MMA striker of all time Anderson Silva in front of his hometown crowd of Manchester in February. Then, on 17 days notice, he stepped up to fight Luke Rockhold for the Middleweight Championship in June at UFC 199. Bisping joked about not having the regular time to get his cardio ready, meaning he would have to knock Rockhold out in the first round. Against the expectations of everyone everwhere, including his own son, he did exactly that. He capped off his year with a successful defense against Dan Henderson, putting the ghosts of UFC 100 to rest. A defense against Yoel Romero was initially slated, which was then changed to a match against a returning George St. Pierre, with both bouts put on hold due to Bisping suffering an injury in May. The GSP fight is possibly back on the cards after the events of UFC 214.


Men's Interim Middleweight Champion - Robert Whittaker (19-4)
Whittaker rode a seven-fight winning streak, including shutting down the deadly takedowns of Ronaldo "Jacare" Souza to slot himself into an Interim Middleweight championship match against Yoel "Soldier of God" Romero. The canny Australian showed incredible heart in taking it to the Cuban Olympic silver medalist over five rounds, and even with a severe knee injury coming in the first he managed to outpoint his opponent to take the unanimous decision. Logic dictates that Whittaker face Michael Bisping for the undisputed championship next, but with George St. Pierre coming back and targeting that match, and Whittaker needing several months off with his injured knee, his future is cloudy at this stage.


Men's Welterweight Champion - Tyron Woodley (17-3-1)
Woodley was promised a title shot against the Welterweight champion 17 months before the fight took place. After Robbie Lawler put in Fight Of The Year performances against Rory MacDonald in July 2015 and Carlos Condit in January 2016, Woodley went into their fight in July of 2016 as a significant underdog. This meant nothing, with Lawler going down to strikes in the first round. Woodley defended his belt against Stephen "Wonderboy" Thompson, putting on an incredible fight that ended in a majority draw at UFC 205 in New York in November 2016. A rematch for this fight was held in March month at UFC 209, with Woodley again the winner in a stilted affair. He defended the title again at UFC 214 in late July 2014 against Demian Maia, following a conservative but sharp gameplan that saw him stop all 22 of the Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu ace's takedown attempts.


Men's Lightweight Champion - Conor MacGregor (21-3)
MacGregor is currently talking his way around the world in the promotional work for his boxing match with Floyd Mayweather. No plans currently exist for him to defend the belt.


Men's Featherweight Champion - Max Holloway (18-3)
Holloway put together a 9-fight win streak, with several Performance of the Night bonuses, before answering the call to contend for the Interim Featherweight Championship at UFC 206 in December 2016. Taking out Anthony Pettis with a body kick and punches late in the third round, he has set himself up for a unification bout against Jose Aldo at UFC 212. At that event in early June 2017, he defeated Aldo in the third round with focused ground and pound, and unified the belts. No opponent is currently announced but there have been rumours that Frankie Edgar will have his chance next.


Men's Bantamweight Champion - Cody Garbrandt (11-0)
After amassing a professional record of 5-0 in the minor leagues, Garbrandt was able to parley this into a UFC contract in January 2015. He then went on to win 5 fights in a row in the UFC, including going from unranked at Bantamweight at the start of 2016 into championship contention at the end. He took on Dominick Cruz for the title at UFC 207 in late December, and in contrast to analysis from a variety of sources, took out Cruz in a unanimous decision. Garbrandt was scheduled to take on TJ Dillashaw at UFC 213 in July, to cap off the current season of The Ultimate Fighter, which has now been cancelled due to a back injury sustained by the champion.


Men's Flyweight Champion - Demetrious Johnson (26-2-1)
After winning the Flyweight Championship in September 2012 in a split decision against Joseph Benevidez, Johnson has amassed a 9-fight streak against the best that the division has had to offer. He has been so dominant that the UFC held an entire Ultimate Figher tournament to find his next challenger. The culmination of this was that Tim Elliott came back out of the MMA wilderness to lose a competitive match against Johnson in early December 2016. Johnson easily defended his title against Wilson Reis in April, tying the all-time title defense record held by Anderson Silva. His next fight is slated to be against TJ Dillashaw for the title, and Johnson indicating he would like TJ to take a fight at 125 and win before taking on the champion


Women's Featherweight Champion - Cristiana Justino(18–1 (1))
With the vacating of this championship by Germaine de Randamie in May 2017, a match was set up for UFC 214 between Justino and Megan Anderson. Anderson pulled out of the fight in late June, and was replaced by current Invicta FC Bantamweight Champion Tonya Evinger. Justino dominated a one-sided affair against a clearly out of shape opponent and won the fight in the third round with brutal knee strikes.


Women's Bantamweight Champion - Amanda Nunes (14-4)
Nunes headlined UFC 200 in July of 2016, putting a vicious beating on Miesha Tate and securing a rear-nake choke victory in a little over three minutes. She backed this up with a brutal 48-second TKO victory against former Women's Bantamweight Champion and WMMA pioneer Rounda Rousey in late December 2016. Nunes was slated to take on Valentina Shevchenko in a rematch of their March 2016 fight, with that match being moved to UFC 216 in September, due to Nunes pulling out due to sinusitis.


Women's Strawweight Champion - Joanna Jędrzejczyk (13-0)
After winning the Women's Strawweight Championship against the one-dimensional Carla Esparza in March 2015, Jędrzejczyk has defended her title four times. Most recent of these was against her Polish countrywoman Karolina Kowalkiewicz at UFC 205 in November 2016. Jędrzejczyk successfully defended her belt against Jessica Andrade at UFC 211 in May. No challenger is currently announced.

Other poo poo

Thanks very much to LobsterMobster for putting together the awards thread for last year:

2016 Rowdy Ringsports MMA Awards - RESULTS THREAD!.

Thanks also go to LobsterMobster for putting together both iterations of the UFC Fightpass Thread

UFC Fight Pass Playlists and Collections

The NEW UFC Fight Pass Collection Thread


Go to the MMA's Best and Worst of the Year, 2017 thread administered by Fentry to keep up with what has been considered by your fellow PSP-MMA posters as the best (and worst) of the UFC.

There's a new thread as of July for Dana White's Tuesday Night Contender Series. Follow along with the not-TUF MMA fights. Thanks to Mewse for putting together the thread. It's a really fun show, not much on it that's not action and the quality of fights has been pretty good so far. A great thing about it as well is that the "results" are known that night, with contracts granted then and there by Dana.

Shout out to DumbWhiteGuy for providing details for the MMA IRC channel.

irc.synirc.net #mma

Join your fellow MMA fans in discussing all things MMA in a place probably secure against nuclear armageddon - IRC has been around for so long I'm not convinced anything could kill it.

More thanks go out to Unfunny Poster for putting together a new UFC Fight Pass Thread - Earning Your 3rd Degree Blackbelt In MMA Posting. This thread is being updated approximately every week with information on new and upcoming additions to the streaming service, and is good for general banter about old fights. August's UFC Fight Pass Match of the Month is the fight that put Chuck "The Iceman" Liddell on the road to the Light Heavyweight championship and the UFC Hall of Fame, taking on Randy "The Natural" Couture from UFC 52, back in April 2005.


As usual, let me know where I hosed something up, and you too could win the No-Prize!

Memento fucked around with this message at 10:57 on Aug 2, 2017

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Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Neurosis posted:

I'm not getting how it's Aldo's style that makes him bad for Frankie rather than 'he's better'. Their last fight bored me a lot so I refuse to do my own research.

Marching Powder posted:

individuals have a natural proclivity towards certain aspects of fighting and mostly work towards maximizing what they're good at while shoring up a defense against what they're not so good at. it then becomes a game of who gets to employee their 'a-game' with greater effectiveness. at the elite level, these differences can be minuscule but simultaneously significant.

that's how you get jose aldo beating frankie by only a single round on at least one score card in both fights meaning that frankie will now lose to yair, and people being absolutely gob smacked with how hilariously wrong a person can possibly be.

Neurosis posted:

i understand what styles are. i don't understand how aldo in particular is a bad style matchup for frankie. i guess he's good at using movement to not expose himself while baiting people for counters, but i don't view it as being some very clear rock/scissors thing going on.

Skip My Posts posted:

he shucks off frankie's take downs like it's nothing and his striking is rangy and powerful enough to gently caress frankie up when he comes in to work his combos that set up his best take downs. aldo is a tough match up for frankie. part of it is being better though you're right

Fat Twitter Man posted:

I sort of lean towards "he's better" for a lot of little reasons, especially how well he adjusted between the first and second fights and Frankie didn't, but he is a nightmare style matchup. they (and Holloway) are so far above the rest of their deep and talented division was more my point.

He's a bad style matchup because his tdd is so good Frankie can't threaten the takedown, which takes away a lot of his tools, and Frankie doesn't have the footwork to cut him off. The second fight was dull because Aldo spent the whole fight pivoting away and Frankie couldn't do anything about it

Marching Powder posted:

if frankie beats up holloway are y'all going to be wondering how frankie became way better than aldo since their last fight or are you going to start thinking about how styles might have something to do with the outcome of a mixed martial arts contest?

Neurosis posted:

no one claimed styles don't have an effect. i just questioned the assertion the reason aldo owned frankie is stylistic, when i'm not really seeing some obvious style mismatch. if you think i'm wrong, i'd love to see a breakdown of why aldo is a nightmare style matchup, as you very well may be noticing things i'm missing which i would like to hear about (especially since i've never trained striking and have only a spectator's understanding of it)!


Putting this here so that the discussion keeps going. We're going to need something to talk about in this dire month.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Fat Twitter Man posted:

And also it's a fresh effort to sell Fight Pass subscriptions, you dullards.

And it's probably working really well. I've had a few people at work ask me about it recently on the back of DWTNCS, like "can I get fightpass in Australia" and "can I watch it on delay or do I need to watch it live".

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
Could have been that his gameplan relied on his endless cardio and strength, and he tried to change it up post-USADA with little to no luck.

In other matters, does anyone outside of the 16(!) "journalists" that rank them give a single solitary poo poo about the UFC pound for pound rankings? The new ones just came out today and Cristine Justino is somehow #13 after beating up a fat bantamweight making her UFC debut.

Wasn't there like 50 actual journalists contributing to these rankings in the past? Not that I'm disparaging Bob Emanuel of Scripps Howard New Service, or Romain Cadot of vladusport.com, or Randy Cumford of the Piscataquis County Tribune.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Rigel posted:

I think as a general rule of thumb, you need a good reason to leave a champion of a division off the Top 15 P4P. If you have a belt, you'll be on the list somewhere.

What loving division? She's a champion of nothing. You need contenders and gatekeepers and prospects to have a division. Right now all W145 has is Justino.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

mewse posted:

Being champion of a dumpster that has "Female Wanderlei" spraypainted on it doesn't make you p4p anything

What about when she inevitably pisses hot for something and it sets fire to the dumpster?

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Snowman_McK posted:

UFC 212: 175,000
UFC 179: 180,000
UFC 169: 230,000
UFC 163: 180,000
UFC 156: 330,000
UFC 142: 230,000
UFC 136: 225,000


The exceptions are the time he fought Conor, the time he co-mained for GSP and UFC 200. You'll notice that the buyrates generally trend down over time. Almost like people lost interest, ironically as the division got more competitive.

Yeah regardless of what you feel about Aldo you actually can't argue with the numbers. It sucks because there's very few fighters that are as fun to watch from a technical point of view.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

TheRationalRedditor posted:

Big Bad Francis N'gannou will sell some cards if they give him a tough, actually marketable nickname and continue successfully hiding the fact he's french

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, CAMEROONIAN SUPERSTAR FRANCIS NGANNOU

Also, what's wrong with "The Predator"?

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

mewse posted:

Bisping vs GSP and Joanna vs Thug Rose on the same card? C'est incroyable.

Cody Garbrandt targeting UFC 217 return

loving hell this could be insane.

Say what you will about Cody's antics outside the octagon - and I've said my share as well - he's really super fun to watch inside it.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
I thought the same thing but man, the judges did not agree with us.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
I think it's good that Joe Silva has gone to count his millions and sit on a beach with his family because we never actually deserved him.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
So has no-one told Nick that he can actually just say "nahh I'm out guys" and they'll stop trying to test him? Not like he ever wants to fight in mma again.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
Alright, so does he know they're not going to test him for weed? He's worried about them testing him while he's doing signings at pot shops or whatever, but they don't actually care about your marijuana metabolites outside 12 hours before and 12 hours after your fight.

Maybe he's getting so high he's worried he wouldn't be able to operate the piss cup.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

kensei posted:

Rose poses nude for Women's Health Magazine

NSFWhttp://i.imgur.com/dELmkob.jpg NSFW

Don't inline NSFW images even with spoiler tags. They still get downloaded.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
Cody vs. TJ is on, and now so is Bisping vs. GSP.

Georges St-Pierre officially signs agreement to fight Michael Bisping at UFC 217

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

drat, smilies have come a long loving way

what happened to 10kB max?

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Bombadilillo posted:

Chael disagreed with that wrasslin statement for 23 minutes. I don't think Kelvin would try to wrestle outpoint him though, but I think he could for 3 rounds.

What about the other two rounds? You don't put Anderson Silva on Fight Night China without putting him in the main.

I.N.R.I posted:

i think its a good fight

I liked it when it was announced after Kelvin smashed Dad Bod Vitor, and I like it now.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

big money big clit posted:

unable to successfully wrestle any of those opponents

A fighter not being able to successfully wrestle Yoel Romero isn't something anyone should consider a mark against that fighter.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

The Dave posted:

Burritos are a hell of a drug

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
https://twitter.com/bokamotoESPN/status/897651892150575108

Khalabib's never going to fight for a title and I'm OK with that.

And this is really for the undisputed LW title because Conor's never going to defend it, and I'm OK with that as well.

Memento fucked around with this message at 04:28 on Aug 16, 2017

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

tesilential posted:

(they can make LW)

Considering that Khalabib can't, Cerrone is probably a good opponent for him. At 170.

Or maybe they can make a deal to make it Super Lightweight. 165 is probably the perfect weight for Khalabib

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Captain Log posted:

How the flaming gently caress does Bigfoot pass any medicals?!

Bloody Elbow posted:

This is utterly atrocious and irresponsible matchmaking. Glory should be raked over the coals for approving such a fight and I cannot see any way you can justify this as competitive or compelling. Silva is completely shot and has taken an enormously high amount of punishment over the span of several years. Now he’s going to kickbox for the first time and it’ll be against the best heavyweight in the world? What is that going to accomplish outside of another paycheck? Who is looking out for Silva’s health here? Verhoeven vs. Bigfoot is disgusting, potentially dangerous, and shouldn’t be sanctioned.

If you are absolutely compelled to watch this, Glory 46 is scheduled for Saturday, October 14th in Guangzhou, China.

There will be even less medical testing than if this event was being held in Kazakhstan or Chechnya. It's a loving travesty.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Snowman_McK posted:

She deserves a wife beater? Interesting hot take.

The domestic abuser deserves the domestic abuser, sure.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
This is the greatest MMA timeline

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
Jon Jones is the greatest of all time at beating Jon Jones

edit: for when he inevitably deletes it

Memento fucked around with this message at 01:43 on Aug 23, 2017

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

So taking that drug there was no way he wasn't getting caught.

What a loving retard

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

BlindSite posted:

As someone said.its probably him taking something he was told was something else or something undetectable.

Good luck blaming this one on dick pills.

Yeah that's more likely. He was probably told it was an amazing cocktail of undetectable research chemicals, and didn't question why it only cost $400. No surprise it ended up being Cold War-era East German swimmer 'roids.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

CommonShore posted:

It's actually possible to test positive for Turinabol after eating tainted kangaroo meat.

yeah those pesky kangaroo farmers putting roids into their farmed kangaroos

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
Remember in the movie Pumping Iron, where there's that dude who lives in his van outside Gold's Gym? That's Jones, in about 8 years time.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Chromatic posted:

Dana's at some event right now and someone got a screen cap. Looks like he's gonna have an aneurysm



dana red

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

tesilential posted:

Weird thing to say considering who just popped
Compared to his NFL playing (and heavily roiding) brothers, Jon Jones is a tiny girly man

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

...and the pitch! posted:

I really was hoping he was going to have a brief bright spot but it looks like he hosed it up after all.

Early contender for September thread title if it wasn't too long

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Captain Log posted:

Getting stripped three times might take the strap of fuckery away from my main man. Is Jones technically a felon or did he work out of that?

He didn't get a felony conviction in the end

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Work Friend Keven posted:

Unlike sub-ufc fighter C.S., Jon Jones
1. is not a felon
2. is a champion

Looking forward to the timeline being restored and Jones not featuring in the OP champion's roster again next month.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=001BUOXA0Ig

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

chaleski posted:

shut down 205 now

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Jst0rm posted:

wtf is wrong with jones? Like he knows the tests are coming.

He was probably sold something that they told him was undetectable. But because he's a fuckup, he didn't realise that undetectable research chemicals cost tens to hundreds of thousands of dollars per cycle. So he was happy paying $400 for East German swim team steroids he thought he would never pop for.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Luigi Thirty posted:

It’s something undetectable, but in the end it’s not?

I hope he won’t get banned for his life.

Not bad.

Not great, but not bad.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Real Jon Jones has such good banter and patience with these idiots. It's the best to see the idiots afterwards realise they've hosed up and own it. The boring ones delete their tweets.

Every time this happens, people call for a fight between @jonjones and @danielcormier (video game producer vs. information security engineer). I think their venue of choice is the Hearthstone arena or maybe Overwatch.

edit:

https://twitter.com/jonjones/status/900433700512563202

drat

Memento fucked around with this message at 23:35 on Aug 23, 2017

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Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Mr. Nice! posted:

Dana White was a boxercise coach that got ran out of Boston by Whitey Bulger and is now wealthy enough to buy all his millionaire neighbors' mansions so he can destroy the HOA and keep his water slide in his back yard.

living the loving dream

everyone in this thread giving him poo poo is just envious as gently caress that he gets to be literally Richie Rich

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