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lol at all of this maybe try tethering a line around the dog's neck and taking it around the block to shame it publicly
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Aug 8, 2017 12:00
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 07:22 |
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Twenty Four posted:lol at all of this call in some squirrels to taunt it, thereby increasing its humiliation
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Aug 8, 2017 12:59
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 Dog more in face than ever before. It's like it can sense I'm reaching my breaking point. Getting the peanut butter now |
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Aug 9, 2017 01:14
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Dog appears to love me more now. Is now trying to seduce me with kisses
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Aug 9, 2017 01:22
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Manifisto posted:drive a car or better yet a pickup truck with a window down so the dog can stick his head out into the wind and slobber all over your windows. this will give the dog the experience of flying, and will hopefully suggest the idea of flying away from you, to some dog nest in the faraway trees Gonna try now. Will report later |
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Aug 9, 2017 01:24
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Throw some raw meat at him as a display of your savagery. |
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Aug 9, 2017 01:25
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yo g tron, you got red text and it aint even red? whats the deal with that lol did you piss off the dumbest poster on the forums or something
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Aug 9, 2017 01:25
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Ride The Gravitron posted:Gonna try now. Will report later Unable to document due to local laws about phone use while driving. Rest assured though that dog appears more grounded than ever. I believe gravity is even stronger around him than before |
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Aug 9, 2017 01:35
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Twenty Four posted:lol at all of this Already established that dog feels no shame, I don't think this will work |
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Aug 9, 2017 01:35
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Might have to just hang on to him for a while longer, every dog eventually becomes extremely depressed after staying in one home for too long. It will become like a prison to him and he will be trying to run away in no time. Make sure he gets plenty of food and water, as he will eventually want to run even more when he looks in the mirror and sees the glutton he has become |
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Aug 9, 2017 02:24
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Try saying very supportive things to the dog to its face, but then mutter (clearly loud enough to still be heard) "jeez this guy." Do this after every meeting. Spend long stretches of time with the dog and then later in the day ask, "Were you around earlier? I feel like I haven't seen you in ages." Ask the dog to do a simple favor for you, but give very few details. When the dog cannot deliver, say "You know what, I'll just do it myself." Sign up for an account at Ashley Mastiff and add it to your Chrome toolbar for everyone to see. |
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Aug 9, 2017 02:41
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keep asking the dog "who's a good boy?" but be sure to never tell him who if anyone actually is a good boy. over time the riddle will eat away at him, undermining his confidence, sapping his joie de vivre. he may ultimately start questioning whether "love" is even a thing beyond transient hormonal/neurochemical disturbances, in which case, bam, problem solved |
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Aug 9, 2017 03:17
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Manifisto posted:keep asking the dog "who's a good boy?" but be sure to never tell him who if anyone actually is a good boy. over time the riddle will eat away at him, undermining his confidence, sapping his joie de vivre. he may ultimately start questioning whether "love" is even a thing beyond transient hormonal/neurochemical disturbances, in which case, bam, problem solved |
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Aug 9, 2017 03:20
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can't believe nothing has worked.. try feeding him treats. he will initially be happy but then slowly realize that you're actively questioning his abilities to hunt and are subverting his natural instinct. he should see this for the slight that it is and realize that you don't see him as a real dog, but only a shell of a canine and leave of his own accord
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Aug 9, 2017 04:09
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attach a parachute on the dog and then shoot it out of a catapult (or trebuchet) and let fate decide
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Aug 10, 2017 06:47
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maybe find another couple animals and put them in the catapult too so they can have an adventure together.
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Aug 10, 2017 06:47
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Manifisto posted:keep asking the dog "who's a good boy?" but be sure to never tell him who if anyone actually is a good boy. over time the riddle will eat away at him, undermining his confidence, sapping his joie de vivre. he may ultimately start questioning whether "love" is even a thing beyond transient hormonal/neurochemical disturbances, in which case, bam, problem solved Another dog midlife crisis!
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Aug 10, 2017 13:28
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the only way to kill a dog is with kindness, op just be nice to the dog and eventually he will die of old age |
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Aug 10, 2017 13:33
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Dog is cute and will be good company for other dog. Surrender to your fate. ---------------- |
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Aug 12, 2017 05:14
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