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JesterOfAmerica
Sep 11, 2015


1. B
2. D
3. N Consume the flesh of our bro let it make us stronger

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super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

No need to sign, we'll take care of that.


Lipstick Apathy

B
D
L

dont be mean to me
May 2, 2007

I'm interplanetary, bitch
Let's go to Mars




JesterOfAmerica posted:

1. B
2. D
3. N Consume the flesh of our bro let it make us stronger


This.

Blasphemaster
Jul 10, 2008



CGN. Invoke the power of our god to convert the remaining body into a Vintage Les Paul made of flesh bone and sinew, then play a bitching solo before walking back home like ain't poo poo happened.

You guys know we're going full biological Fury Road. Let's get started.

Blasphemaster fucked around with this message at May 1, 2018 around 04:15

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



It is local tradition to Moutn for snake bro by taking a whole week of cruise.

See you after next week.

Xarbala
Feb 13, 2011

Rolling Thunder: War to the Knife, Knife to the Hilt

Why? , that's why.

Happy Cruise Week! Actually try the nice food the chefs make and don't settle for the fast food they put out to satisfy the idiots.


BDI

rest in peace bros, fuckin Heroes man

Blasphemaster
Jul 10, 2008



Take funerary/celebratory pictures!

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.




Blasphemaster posted:

Take funerary/celebratory pictures!


Nyaa fucked around with this message at May 19, 2018 around 15:29

Blasphemaster
Jul 10, 2008



Good times.

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



Bro... Bro will stay within me. Both in memory and physically! After cutting out a chunk of bro’s meat, I plan to consume a part of him to live on within me. I just can’t go on without my bro...

It took quite awhile due to the serpent scale that my bro wears like a legendary armor. I don’t know how much time have passed before realized i can cut the meat from the exposed neck instead.


It’s evenly-cooked by the fire arrow. It certainly have the manly smell of bro that would get many ladies' mouth to water. The meat taste just like bro. It’s a shame I couldn’t stay and eat it all. But I must go. There are things that need to Get.It.Done. Bro would want me to move on.


A small pieces of bro’s poisonous fang broke off to the side of the road. That will do for the proper burying later.


That is, as the status screen popped up to inform me of how i got poisoned. Again. I assume the poison is strong enough to permeate through the skin.


Let just say the rain turn into a storm for the rest of the night while i vomited bro many time. Yes, the poison want to separate me and bro. So I cut small chucks of his meat while i travel down the road, and wisely take small bite of them in hope that my symptoms would stop making me vomit my bro.

Strangely, this time I didn’t lose any hp and only felt slightly awful, but mostly from the incessant vomiting. Bro must be protecting me from above... and within.

Still, for once my bad fortune didn’t fully hinder my goal. Only slows me down. I will call that a plus. Anything is better than explosive diarrhea.

-------------------------

I passed out somewhere in my brave venture of return that would have make bro proud. By the time I am awaken, it is high noon and suffering skin burn from exposing too long under the sunlight. I do lose HP to that, but thankfully, cooling down in the shade ends the effect, but not the physical skin damage. I am sure healing my HP would fix that. My modified new body system is really a blessing... From (dark) god.

Now there’s more reason to go back to him. I am not too sure what the point of this trip is, but at least i am not dead yet.

To be Continue

Xarbala
Feb 13, 2011

Rolling Thunder: War to the Knife, Knife to the Hilt

Why? , that's why.

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



The next couple of days was uneventful. Nothing bad happen beside my continuous effort to keep bro’s inside me while fighting against the recurring vomit. No one is going to leave me! Not HOTWING, not CLARKSON, never again!

The first three days was an awful cycle of bro meat, poison, walk, vomit, bro meat until I run out and have to search for smaller pieces of my bro in my vomit. My throat is on fire with the stomach acids melting it regularly, but the dark god aura regulate it to HP damage instead of truly physical harm, and my sleep restores enough HP to repeat it all over again.

Gained Poison Resistance E

”Poison Resistance E” posted:

Gained strong resistance (not immune) and tolerance to poisonous effects. Minor poison will be degraded by one rank and the body can act normally under E rank poison.

The next day after that though, I didn’t vomit anymore. My body finally accepted Bro. Now we will live on together. wE ARe fOEveR.


B]Delusion (Major) Evolved into Early Stage Insanity[/b]

Yes, I can hear bro’s voice again. He is ssssspeaking to us in my soul.

“Geeeet it donssss.” He said.

“Weeee don’t failsssss.” He encouraged.

Bro got my back. I can walk on disregarding the pain on my legs. Sometimes… Bro helped me walk.

Developed Snake Bro Personality

”Snake Bro Personality posted:


COOL SHED BRO! It’s smaller than my body, but it’s humid in here! Nice home, nice house, and cooool… We can Get.It.Done. with this much sync between us!

It helped a lot when I can rest in the soul while bro walk for me. Yes, me and bro is one, of course he can use my body for annnythiiiingsss. Bro said real man can handle any poisonous berry, so my starvation situation was solved! Thanks bro! I didn’t know I have it in me!


Finally, a couple of days travel with my bro finally bring us back to the village of the cult. The guard and the elder was expecting me with reverence of a returning hero… From a maintained mid distance. Snake-bro thinks we are awesome warriorss!

I don’t even need to ask them to lead me to their god. The village elder send me straight back to the… Sacrificial Room.

“Make Sense.” Snake-Bro commented. “We meet him like this last time.”


How can I disagree with bro’s logic? As afraid as I would normally be, I knew bro got my back. Well, except the sacrificial dagger that will be plunge into my chest. Hopefully it won’t hur-


"Hey is that rust on th-"

-3 HP

“GAHHHH!” I cried as the dagger stabbed hard into my heart and I can feel something cold slide into my body and sever something. MY INSIDE HURTS! WHY AM I STILL ALIVE!

-3 HP

The surprised cultist immediately plunge his knife into my abdominal and I can feel my stomach split in half like I have two packs except it’s hurt and it’s like water ballon butter knife AGGHRJHHHHHHHHH-

The wide-eyed cultist immediate grab hold of my neck as he pull the knife off my belly to slit my throat. THIS HURT LESS BUT-

-10 HP

---------


“Hi.” Charysler in middle aged human male form with unremarkable t-shirt greeted in an elderly old voice. It is a very casual greeting.

“Hi.” I greeted back. “Yo! Ma’ dog!” Snake-bro greeted. “What’sssss up?”

Charysler stood there to studies me with a blank face for several minutes of awkward silent. Did I fail the mission? I don’t really want to be the first person to bring it up, but this soulless staring is getting very uncomfortable in this dark, dark place.

“So… Dude, It’s… Cool.” Charysler said without much emotion on his human face. Snake-bro thinks he have a long way to go before joining the cool kidz club with that poor display of humanity. I agree, but every cool kidz have to start somewhere. Why would he want to be cool? Why won’t he want to be cool? Snake-bro thoughts back. Good point bro, good point.


I strike a reciprocal Cool Pose as instructed by bro and give him a thumb up with my sparkling smile. Yes, this masterpiece was explained to me that Gods like prayer, so a half kneeing and high praying hands are the latest fab that covers all variety of respectable Worship Pose. “It’s cool.” We stated.

Several more minutes of awkwardness passed as I maintain the cool pose to the silent of the dark god. Bro thinks he is measuring or testing our coolness, and it would be bad form to drop the pose until he speak again. The real cool kidz have to be the example - the role model.

“Cool. Cool.” Charysler commented in a child voice to my immense relief of my awesome pose. “You should be rewarded. What do you want? I can think of a couple… My homie.”
A) Bring snake-bro back to life.
B) Full info of my Bad Luck Trait. He warned that knowing its full nature would make it worst for me. Speaking of that, he already corrected the EXP Multiplier typo to be 100x.
C) Money or Material stuff
D) Specific Power (Note: From an abomination dark god)
E) Body alteration. Need four arms? Zebra legs?
F) Soul alteration to forcefully remove your bad luck trait. You would not be you anymore. Game Over.
G) Write-in

[b”]Any question, mah man?”[/b] Charysler said in a deep manly voice with his human arm raised and then dip two finger down in some strange 70s(?) hand gesture. Peace? But opposite? Maybe I should reply with some posture? OF COURSE YOU NEED A POSE! Snake-bro shouted in the head.

Blasphemaster
Jul 10, 2008



A/C combo, duh. Being able to summon Snekbro at will as our spirit animal would be pretty cool.

JesterOfAmerica
Sep 11, 2015


E: Give us snake Venom and the ability to spit at projectile speeds

Xarbala
Feb 13, 2011

Rolling Thunder: War to the Knife, Knife to the Hilt

Why? , that's why.

Blasphemaster posted:

A/C combo, duh. Being able to summon Snekbro at will as our spirit animal would be pretty cool.

I like the sound of this and there is no risk of snakebro or Mr. Kim becoming vulnerable to Turn Undead should Charysler grant this boon

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



“I see. A guide would certainly help you in this whole new world that you are adopting… Poorly so far.”

My mind ignore the critic even if he is a god. Everyone have wrong opinion, and other people won’t had survived for what I gone through. Then again, you can read my mind, don’t you?

“Yes.” The handsome man with a growing smile answered with slow nodding.

“…” My mind reflexively blank out for a moment in a futile attempt to prevent the mind reading, but then feel kinda dumb that I already accepted this at the beginning. Wait, this is what I really thought, right?

“Yes.” The handsome and beautifully curly haired god in human form answered again. His smile grow not wide enough to ruin the pretty face, but the slow nodding there leads my eye going up and down.

What do you think bro? I asked my bro mentally. Bro said you can trust this man with your life. Well, if bro puts it that way, I guess I should.

“Are you ready for the reward?” The godly handsome man with beautiful curly natural hair asked. Maybe bro is right, this dude is chill.

“Yes.” This time I answered and did the some slow nods. The feeling to imitate the handsome man in front of me is-is like he is a role model of how a man who can get all the girls would behaves. Bro think so too, this man could get laid anywhere and the city guard who pass by will know not to inference in the awesome display of athletic prowess.

The handsome god slowly raise its hand towards me, and I shamed myself by thinking he wants to shake my hand. My raised hand was ignored as his extended hand keep raising to the side of my head. I can feel his finger… Slide into my head, and fingering around like cables moving and connecting to somehow work with an organic brain. It doesn’t hurt and I can still think normally, so it must be fine, right, bro?

Bro?

Bro Personality Removed

Bro didn’t answers, like he went to the MAN’S ROOM and have a hard time relaxing.

“He’s here.” The handsome god - enough accurate description about him- said as he pull his fingers(?) out of my head and show me a… Car key. This, is the totem of your Spiritual Bro-Guidance. “As much as I would prefer you have your brother ‘on’ all the time, your bro and me have come to the understanding that it is best for you to take your own path with minimal influence of living his life.”

The plain silver car key drops onto my still raised hand. It’s warm, brotherly warm. I can vaguely sense the presence of my bro within, slithering his advice to me or asking for pizza. It’s cool - not temperature cool.

“If you ever seek the wise guidance and spiritual form of your bro,” The God of Bro’s Friend explains. “Insert the key into any part of your head and turn him on.”

Why a key though. I thought to myself and the God’s mind reading ability.

“A totem is a manifestation of the spirit, which… Your bro came from your heart, thus it represent your life as a truck driver as a car key.” He explained.

It sounded like BS for some reason. Something in my core hates that explanation, but I don’t know why. I DO like the car key design. The key’s edge looks like a snake and the key fits the size of my holding fingers well. It’s like I am born to own this; my whole life was grown to wield this like a knight to a sword.

“Before you use it to commune with your bro,” The god interrupted my motion to try out the key. The enigmatic sensation going full blast like a wiseman is going to impart the most important prophecy. “Do you want to work for me?”
A) Yes, as a full membership cultist with mystical benefit, status, and great loyalty to the mighty Charysler. Life Insurance will need to be negotiate separately.
B) Yes, as freeman representative without the mentioned benefit except the same mission rewards.
C) Yes, part-time or short-term contract as freeman representative.
D) No.
E) No, but refer me to other employers instead.
F) Write-in

Xarbala
Feb 13, 2011

Rolling Thunder: War to the Knife, Knife to the Hilt

Why? , that's why.

C most of the hardships and responsibilities but none of the benefits and the expectation of needing to go find another job later, what could possibly go wrong

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5BEBjbIilwY

Blasphemaster
Jul 10, 2008



A Seems like it cannot backfire whatsoever. Yup.

dont be mean to me
May 2, 2007

I'm interplanetary, bitch
Let's go to Mars




Blasphemaster posted:

A Seems like it cannot backfire whatsoever. Yup.

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JesterOfAmerica
Sep 11, 2015


Blasphemaster posted:

A Seems like it cannot backfire whatsoever. Yup.

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