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1. B 2. D 3. N Consume the flesh of our bro let it make us stronger
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Apr 30, 2018 19:25
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B D L
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May 1, 2018 00:07
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JesterOfAmerica posted:1. B This.
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May 1, 2018 00:16
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CGN. Invoke the power of our god to convert the remaining body into a Vintage Les Paul made of flesh bone and sinew, then play a bitching solo before walking back home like ain't poo poo happened. You guys know we're going full biological Fury Road. Let's get started. Blasphemaster fucked around with this message at 05:15 on May 1, 2018 |
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May 1, 2018 05:13
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It is local tradition to Moutn for snake bro by taking a whole week of cruise. See you after next week.
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May 18, 2018 18:24
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Happy Cruise Week! Actually try the nice food the chefs make and don't settle for the fast food they put out to satisfy the idiots. BDI rest in peace bros, fuckin Heroes man
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May 18, 2018 21:30
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Take funerary/celebratory pictures!
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May 19, 2018 04:26
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Blasphemaster posted:Take funerary/celebratory pictures! 
Nyaa fucked around with this message at 16:29 on May 19, 2018 |
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May 19, 2018 16:27
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Good times.
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May 19, 2018 18:45
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Bro... Bro will stay within me. Both in memory and physically! After cutting out a chunk of bro’s meat, I plan to consume a part of him to live on within me. I just can’t go on without my bro... It took quite awhile due to the serpent scale that my bro wears like a legendary armor. I don’t know how much time have passed before realized i can cut the meat from the exposed neck instead.  It’s evenly-cooked by the fire arrow. It certainly have the manly smell of bro that would get many ladies' mouth to water. The meat taste just like bro. It’s a shame I couldn’t stay and eat it all. But I must go. There are things that need to Get.It.Done. Bro would want me to move on.  A small pieces of bro’s poisonous fang broke off to the side of the road. That will do for the proper burying later.  That is, as the status screen popped up to inform me of how i got poisoned. Again. I assume the poison is strong enough to permeate through the skin.  Let just say the rain turn into a storm for the rest of the night while i vomited bro many time. Yes, the poison want to separate me and bro. So I cut small chucks of his meat while i travel down the road, and wisely take small bite of them in hope that my symptoms would stop making me vomit my bro. Strangely, this time I didn’t lose any hp and only felt slightly awful, but mostly from the incessant vomiting. Bro must be protecting me from above... and within. Still, for once my bad fortune didn’t fully hinder my goal. Only slows me down. I will call that a plus. Anything is better than explosive diarrhea. ------------------------- I passed out somewhere in my brave venture of return that would have make bro proud. By the time I am awaken, it is high noon and suffering skin burn from exposing too long under the sunlight. I do lose HP to that, but thankfully, cooling down in the shade ends the effect, but not the physical skin damage. I am sure healing my HP would fix that. My modified new body system is really a blessing... From (dark) god. Now there’s more reason to go back to him. I am not too sure what the point of this trip is, but at least i am not dead yet. To be Continue
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Jun 9, 2018 14:51
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Jun 10, 2018 05:46
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The next couple of days was uneventful. Nothing bad happen beside my continuous effort to keep bro’s inside me while fighting against the recurring vomit. No one is going to leave me! Not HOTWING, not CLARKSON, never again! The first three days was an awful cycle of bro meat, poison, walk, vomit, bro meat until I run out and have to search for smaller pieces of my bro in my vomit. My throat is on fire with the stomach acids melting it regularly, but the dark god aura regulate it to HP damage instead of truly physical harm, and my sleep restores enough HP to repeat it all over again. Gained Poison Resistance E ”Poison Resistance E” posted:Gained strong resistance (not immune) and tolerance to poisonous effects. Minor poison will be degraded by one rank and the body can act normally under E rank poison. The next day after that though, I didn’t vomit anymore. My body finally accepted Bro. Now we will live on together. wE ARe fOEveR.  B]Delusion (Major) Evolved into Early Stage Insanity[/b] Yes, I can hear bro’s voice again. He is ssssspeaking to us in my soul. “Geeeet it donssss.” He said. “Weeee don’t failsssss.” He encouraged. Bro got my back. I can walk on disregarding the pain on my legs. Sometimes… Bro helped me walk. Developed Snake Bro Personality ”Snake Bro Personality posted:
It helped a lot when I can rest in the soul while bro walk for me. Yes, me and bro is one, of course he can use my body for annnythiiiingsss. Bro said real man can handle any poisonous berry, so my starvation situation was solved! Thanks bro! I didn’t know I have it in me!  Finally, a couple of days travel with my bro finally bring us back to the village of the cult. The guard and the elder was expecting me with reverence of a returning hero… From a maintained mid distance. Snake-bro thinks we are awesome warriorss! I don’t even need to ask them to lead me to their god. The village elder send me straight back to the… Sacrificial Room. “Make Sense.” Snake-Bro commented. “We meet him like this last time.”  How can I disagree with bro’s logic? As afraid as I would normally be, I knew bro got my back. Well, except the sacrificial dagger that will be plunge into my chest. Hopefully it won’t hur-  "Hey is that rust on th-" -3 HP “GAHHHH!” I cried as the dagger stabbed hard into my heart and I can feel something cold slide into my body and sever something. MY INSIDE HURTS! WHY AM I STILL ALIVE! -3 HP The surprised cultist immediately plunge his knife into my abdominal and I can feel my stomach split in half like I have two packs except it’s hurt and it’s like water ballon butter knife AGGHRJHHHHHHHHH- The wide-eyed cultist immediate grab hold of my neck as he pull the knife off my belly to slit my throat. THIS HURT LESS BUT- -10 HP ---------  “Hi.” Charysler in middle aged human male form with unremarkable t-shirt greeted in an elderly old voice. It is a very casual greeting. “Hi.” I greeted back. “Yo! Ma’ dog!” Snake-bro greeted. “What’sssss up?” Charysler stood there to studies me with a blank face for several minutes of awkward silent. Did I fail the mission? I don’t really want to be the first person to bring it up, but this soulless staring is getting very uncomfortable in this dark, dark place. “So… Dude, It’s… Cool.” Charysler said without much emotion on his human face. Snake-bro thinks he have a long way to go before joining the cool kidz club with that poor display of humanity. I agree, but every cool kidz have to start somewhere. Why would he want to be cool? Why won’t he want to be cool? Snake-bro thoughts back. Good point bro, good point.  I strike a reciprocal Cool Pose as instructed by bro and give him a thumb up with my sparkling smile. Yes, this masterpiece was explained to me that Gods like prayer, so a half kneeing and high praying hands are the latest fab that covers all variety of respectable Worship Pose. “It’s cool.” We stated. Several more minutes of awkwardness passed as I maintain the cool pose to the silent of the dark god. Bro thinks he is measuring or testing our coolness, and it would be bad form to drop the pose until he speak again. The real cool kidz have to be the example - the role model. “Cool. Cool.” Charysler commented in a child voice to my immense relief of my awesome pose. “You should be rewarded. What do you want? I can think of a couple… My homie.” A) Bring snake-bro back to life. B) Full info of my Bad Luck Trait. He warned that knowing its full nature would make it worst for me. Speaking of that, he already corrected the EXP Multiplier typo to be 100x. C) Money or Material stuff D) Specific Power (Note: From an abomination dark god) E) Body alteration. Need four arms? Zebra legs? F) Soul alteration to forcefully remove your bad luck trait. You would not be you anymore. Game Over. G) Write-in [b”]Any question, mah man?”[/b] Charysler said in a deep manly voice with his human arm raised and then dip two finger down in some strange 70s(?) hand gesture. Peace? But opposite? Maybe I should reply with some posture? OF COURSE YOU NEED A POSE! Snake-bro shouted in the head.
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Jun 21, 2018 23:55
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A/C combo, duh. Being able to summon Snekbro at will as our spirit animal would be pretty cool.
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Jun 22, 2018 03:34
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E: Give us snake Venom and the ability to spit at projectile speeds
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Jun 22, 2018 03:55
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Blasphemaster posted:A/C combo, duh. Being able to summon Snekbro at will as our spirit animal would be pretty cool. I like the sound of this and there is no risk of snakebro or Mr. Kim becoming vulnerable to Turn Undead should Charysler grant this boon
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Jun 26, 2018 12:26
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“I see. A guide would certainly help you in this whole new world that you are adopting… Poorly so far.” My mind ignore the critic even if he is a god. Everyone have wrong opinion, and other people won’t had survived for what I gone through. Then again, you can read my mind, don’t you? “Yes.” The handsome man with a growing smile answered with slow nodding. “…” My mind reflexively blank out for a moment in a futile attempt to prevent the mind reading, but then feel kinda dumb that I already accepted this at the beginning. Wait, this is what I really thought, right? “Yes.” The handsome and beautifully curly haired god in human form answered again. His smile grow not wide enough to ruin the pretty face, but the slow nodding there leads my eye going up and down. What do you think bro? I asked my bro mentally. Bro said you can trust this man with your life. Well, if bro puts it that way, I guess I should. “Are you ready for the reward?” The godly handsome man with beautiful curly natural hair asked. Maybe bro is right, this dude is chill. “Yes.” This time I answered and did the some slow nods. The feeling to imitate the handsome man in front of me is-is like he is a role model of how a man who can get all the girls would behaves. Bro think so too, this man could get laid anywhere and the city guard who pass by will know not to inference in the awesome display of athletic prowess. The handsome god slowly raise its hand towards me, and I shamed myself by thinking he wants to shake my hand. My raised hand was ignored as his extended hand keep raising to the side of my head. I can feel his finger… Slide into my head, and fingering around like cables moving and connecting to somehow work with an organic brain. It doesn’t hurt and I can still think normally, so it must be fine, right, bro? Bro? Bro Personality Removed Bro didn’t answers, like he went to the MAN’S ROOM and have a hard time relaxing. “He’s here.” The handsome god - enough accurate description about him- said as he pull his fingers(?) out of my head and show me a… Car key. This, is the totem of your Spiritual Bro-Guidance. “As much as I would prefer you have your brother ‘on’ all the time, your bro and me have come to the understanding that it is best for you to take your own path with minimal influence of living his life.” The plain silver car key drops onto my still raised hand. It’s warm, brotherly warm. I can vaguely sense the presence of my bro within, slithering his advice to me or asking for pizza. It’s cool - not temperature cool. “If you ever seek the wise guidance and spiritual form of your bro,” The God of Bro’s Friend explains. “Insert the key into any part of your head and turn him on.” Why a key though. I thought to myself and the God’s mind reading ability. “A totem is a manifestation of the spirit, which… Your bro came from your heart, thus it represent your life as a truck driver as a car key.” He explained. It sounded like BS for some reason. Something in my core hates that explanation, but I don’t know why. I DO like the car key design. The key’s edge looks like a snake and the key fits the size of my holding fingers well. It’s like I am born to own this; my whole life was grown to wield this like a knight to a sword. “Before you use it to commune with your bro,” The god interrupted my motion to try out the key. The enigmatic sensation going full blast like a wiseman is going to impart the most important prophecy. “Do you want to work for me?” A) Yes, as a full membership cultist with mystical benefit, status, and great loyalty to the mighty Charysler. Life Insurance will need to be negotiate separately. B) Yes, as freeman representative without the mentioned benefit except the same mission rewards. C) Yes, part-time or short-term contract as freeman representative. D) No. E) No, but refer me to other employers instead. F) Write-in
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Jul 2, 2018 15:38
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C most of the hardships and responsibilities but none of the benefits and the expectation of needing to go find another job later, what could possibly go wrong https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5BEBjbIilwY
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Jul 3, 2018 00:52
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A Seems like it cannot backfire whatsoever. Yup.
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Jul 3, 2018 16:48
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Blasphemaster posted:A Seems like it cannot backfire whatsoever. Yup.
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Jul 3, 2018 20:04
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Blasphemaster posted:A Seems like it cannot backfire whatsoever. Yup.
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Jul 4, 2018 06:10
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“Sweet, man.” The figure smiles perfectly in its imitation of human emotion while knowledge begins to pours into my mind. A mere boiling, nagging, outlandish illusion to preserve what is left of the new disciple. The first sight of great thrashing, atrocious, and malicious mutilation of its ever-changing true form would have killed the lesser man if not for the immediate blindness of flesh mutation in his eyes that sacrificed its lifespan to protect the hapless jelly brain to a dissolved, pudding-like sponge. “Welcome to the club.” Gained Esoteric Mind It is now, that I can feel the truth of the material world. Human are merely mottled, hellish, thrashing ape that survived with the help of gods for their whim or unbeknownst, and incomprehensible reasoning. The viperous, pliable, slender sound of your my great brother slitter quietly within my soul. Acknowledging the winged thrashing angel in their their quivering, and ungainly mould of true form is waiting patiently for my gatherance of the deviant mind. Such behavior is morbid to the greatness of the throbbing pseudopod in sight. I kneed. New and strong faith fills my strengthen heart. I am accepted. For I have taken his quest to see the truth of the world in my brief journey and broke loose my ulgy, pronged gangrene mind of the flash. To be rebuild by the great Charysler into something surpassing flowing organic that can pierce through vast perversion. Speaking or Thinking of his name alone felt like a screaming, repellent flame to all disbeliever. “Now that you are part of the club.” The illusional man behind the hazy, and shiny appendage begins cooly. “Me and other gods got dragged into this Racing sport business of human kind.” The humoring voice of Charysler ceased as soon as the word ‘dragged’ pour out the last of that voluminous, deviant syrup from the faceless sinewy enshrined in protoplasmic phantasy. “Which is why everyone is ‘dragging’ candidate all over the human world.” I gasps in realization. Snake-bro nods in his domain to reaffirm the truth of the mucky matter: Other Gods are kidnapping human to play this Racing Game. The second realization is my immediate disqualification to their eyes like an acidic, molten ichor of worthless slime. Enormous and wretched cloud of noxious emotion clouded my mind in artifice. An ironic respond to the reveal of such irrational ploy. How could I help my employer to deal with this ghastly atrocity? “No. You will be participating the game.” Charysler’s reply terminate my thought like numbing vapor of present life. His majesty’s pinkish lunatic tentacled organ continues to yammers. “Xenophobia is strong in other gods. A moaning flows for those who does not fit their perfect images.” The grim, yet sticky slobber-like voice of resembling sadness can be heard. “Though I care not for the game of such debauched jumble, my relation with other beings should remain bleached crystal. Resplendent and xenophobic confusion both invades my senses. Charysler has exaggerated his uncaringness for all life – Neither deathless nor thrashing life went unsupervised by his care under a furred, colossal cone. Nonsensical and gangrenous evasiveness is what makes him lonely, that lumpy idiot. “I accept.” An insane, but indigestible air of determination filled with words. The froglike acidic smell of Charysler, shall be wiped off by me like a gross sponge to make other gods sleeplessly appendage his enormity. “Coooool.” He replies in his extended attempt of a goat among wolf maintains the turbulent in dingy fear, but my phlegmatic new mind know that is his death if he don’t do better. Seriously, that abysmal, fearful degraded idiot! Yet, that matter have to be put aside, for his boiling animation continues. “There’s a race starting today. I am not sure which vehicle you prefer, so please choose among these creations as I register your entry.” Which of these vehicle so I choose? A) A giant lionwheel with internal apartment. B) A monster truck reinforced in skulls of its roadkill. C) A ringworm that is capable of burrowing.
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Jul 19, 2018 20:44
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A We have wheel experience
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Jul 19, 2018 21:29
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A
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Jul 19, 2018 21:31
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A Nothing like old times. So what are we a Metroid or something now? Is he? Honestly I'm super tired and my mental image making faculties are shot from WAY TOO MICH CAFFEINE earlier today.
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Jul 21, 2018 05:43
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Blasphemaster posted:So what are we a Metroid or something now? Is he? Honestly I'm super tired and my mental image making faculties are shot from WAY TOO MICH CAFFEINE earlier today. We gained Estoric Mind as part of the god blessing, this stack with our Insanity to turn our mind into a Lovecraft MC. Our snake-bro personality got removed to become a guardian spirit within us for advise and what not. It seem our faction will be riding Lovecratian vehicle. Nyaa fucked around with this message at 13:36 on Jul 21, 2018 |
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Jul 21, 2018 13:27
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Sounds fun. Let's make sure we get a Noir Detective outfit as part of the deal.
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Jul 21, 2018 14:37
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 “Welcome!” Charysler smiles slyly as he pulls out two guns to pop some noise for the momentous occasion! Thankfully, none of the bullet gone to waste as they enters my body and smoothly went out the other end.     You have initiated into Cultist Class! You now worship Charysler, the very cool dude-god, the Dermis Dentist, the Flashshaper, the Salad Guy Gained Charysler’s Blessing: Unify Health ”God’s Blessing” posted:
”Charysler’s Blessing: Unify Health” posted:
   All Insanity Traits merged with Esoteric Mind Trait! It mutated into the skill: Esoteric Beliefs ”Esoteric Beliefs B+” posted:
To be Continues at the Preliminaries!
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Aug 8, 2018 03:02
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 It was bright morning sunshine in who knows where this god-created place is. A dimension space that made specifically to house this beautiful giant racing stadium that stretches to the far end of this space, which is many miles down to the edge of one’s eyesight.  Many audiences of supernatural sort are cheering for their favorite champion racer - The chosen heroes of the Gods to provide amusement for those who understood boredom.  “Welcome! Welcome every angel, demon, spirit, beastman, and many others beings who are able to attend this preliminary match! I am your host, Bristol Spoooooooot!”  “Today, we are here at the Left Turn to Heaven Race Track! The endless left turn in circles, that gets higher and higher to the top! It would be a pain if you fall off track and have to start over!” “Yes, yes, I know this is easy peasy for God’s representative, but this is the Preliminary, we got to make sure it’s easy enough for those unworthy lesser god’s rookies!”  “Which is why I added a little 'push' to spice things up at the last minute! Yeah! Go me!”  “Without further ado, let me introduce the first contestaaaaaant!”  “Hail from Chevrolet, the War God have send his Swordrider Disciple! Riding on top of this Subcompact Warborn Crimson Sabre powered by the Grandmaster LightShield-tm small-block engine in the blade. He will sure to give one hell of an offensive charge!”  “Neeeext, is the Buckeye, known to all as the God of Archer! Don’t look down on their archer disciple! They can snipe down a castle wall easily! I know! I saw it myself! And boy o’ boy, their god is sending in their White Scaled Long Dragon! That thing is long like a train! It is one of the species that known for breaking land speed record on a straight charge! But why are they sending that for a circling race path!? What? You don’t know what a train is? Oh hell, it’s like a-”  “-Anyhow those are the current fav for winning today’s match! But wait! Callaway, the God of Pressure have send a large and… held-together boulder? A rock wheel? It’s less impressive now that I look at it. Maybe they are holding their best card for future race?”  “A surprisingly spiky contestant from Elio, the God of Three! They send a floating three-point Warper Star over as expected from their namesake! Everything is three to them. Not much is known about this star, but everything a perfect three in its design! Warper!? Is teleporting legal!? What do you mean they have three-point legal teleportation!? What does that even mean-”  “Finally, we have Falcon, the God of Everchanging! Another smaller contestant that would be better for an obstacle course! Come on, gods! This course should be all about raw firepower like the first two constant! What the hell am I even looking at here? What? Another Wrap, but shapeshifting instead of goddamn teleporting? Again, that sounds great for obstacle courses! What shape it gonna take for a left turn curve!? WHAT!? That is literally a pieces of gum Falcon is chewing and spit it out with some power in it!? That’s just low effort! Or is it more than meet the eyes! Only one way to find ou-” Music: Noir  “What’s that? We have a last minute participant? I swear if that is another chewing g-“  Another cup of coffee to keep my brain going for another day. This was what I were missing since I came to this world. Anyone would go crazy without coffee.  “Ho-HOLD IT! ARE YOU SERIOUS! The dark god? THAT DARK GOD!? BUT THE TITLE HERE SAID ‘COOL DUDE’! If t-  The red wine in the glass tasted like blood. Maybe it is blood, with a taste of wine. Perhaps my blood from the time Charysler shots me.  “OH MY GOD! HE IS DROPPING THAT THING FROM THE SKY!?”  He said it was to prevent my bad luck from making me fail to participle. No choice on that front.  Now I am fully awakened five minutes before the race begin. The engine already started, and I am the engine of this… Thing.  At least it will not take long to take home the trophy.  But how do I drive this thing? Why am I sitting in a bar inside the carved up nose area of the Giant Lionwheel? write-in. You can ask your god and snake bro. Maybe the lionwheel can talk?
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Sep 1, 2018 18:26
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"GREAT LIONWHEEL MAY WE BE ABLE TO WORK IN HARMONY"
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Sep 1, 2018 21:04
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Gotta engage in mysterious noir-boozing and such before a race. It's in the rules. Also the booze is our own fermented blood which is neat I guess. Anyway, saunter on down there and climb in. Boss, what's up with the lion wheel theme? Any chance we can throw in some snakes and form them up into a kickass halftrack and steamroll these scrubs? Bro, know any good introduction theme music for me? I'ma humiliate these scrubs.
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Sep 2, 2018 03:57
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 JesterOfAmerica posted:"GREAT LIONWHEEL MAY WE BE ABLE TO WORK IN HARMONY"  "GODDAMN! THAT'S ME LOSING ALL MY BREAKFAST PROTEIN! ANYONE GONE DEAF YET?" Blasphemaster posted:Boss, what's up with the lion wheel theme? Any chance we can throw in some snakes and form them up into a kickass halftrack and steamroll these scrubs? The cup replies. "You forgot? You choose 'A giant lionwheel with internal apartment'. As for Road Tactics, they aren't illegal." quote:Bro, know any good introduction theme music for me? I'ma humiliate these scrubs. Snake Bro Spirit Totem posted:
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Sep 2, 2018 13:58
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 “Oh no, this is not good!”  “The Great Balancing on the race is happening!”  “Ahem. As most of you will know, the stage is enchanted to make sure all contestant have equal opportunity.”  “So a large spiral road grow out of the small one to accommodate the large monster while the original road thinned somewhat to ensure the monster can’t get on it. Don’t worry, the road will instantly regenerate if any big monster tries to crush it.”  “Now without further ado, let’s begi-“  “Oh dear, it seem all of our audience seated on the other side witnessed the backend of that monster and either fainted or gone insane. Some are jumping or climbing off the stand to escape or suicide!” “Well, let’s start without them… And I recommend everyone to avert your eyes when the monster turns around.”  “Except me of course. I don’t get to be a commentator if I have to look away from the race! No matter how awful the other side might be!” ----------------  Now that Snake Bro mentioned it, there is a regal looking lionman in bartender uniform stereotypically cleaning a clean glass. “Hello?” I call to it uncertainly. “Can it understood me or would it attack me like a lion? You never know who you will meet in a bar.”  The proud and bored lion stares down at my frozen body, measuring me with its impeccable Golden Eyes of the kgjbiwjv gjisjigs.  “Hey bro! It’s your bro here to help you out as your personal tutor for all things strange and unknown in the spirit world!”  "See this handsome feller here with a dangerous face? It’s much worse if your [Estoric Mind] didn’t filter ‘This One’ into something understandable. However, that blessing isn’t max rank yet, which mean some terrible stuff could spill into any place like the metaphorical sentence in your mind! But don’t worry, bro! You’ve been through worse than that and I will help you navigate the strange and treacherous road of estoric social communition!" “Thanks bro, but how I should talk to it? The lion seem quite intimidation. As if he would ask me what I want any moment now... You said he knows how to drive this thing?" "Not exactly bro! Only the… uhh… building appropriate thing? So that 'lion bartender' is part of the driving mechanism. It doesn't know how to run the house... Or maybe it does? I don't know how much a bartender knows, do you? Anyway, what I am seeing might be giving me a different impression of how it works, and your 'flitered' version might provide you the way to interact with a 'bartender'? Try ordering a drink!" ... "I hate that it make sense in such a convoluted way. Is there a manual I can read instead?" "Uhh, about that, do you remember when I mention what ‘they’ told about the building appropriate thing? Well, it’s actually a book manual with multiple voices tell me… Things. It’s design to fry the human brain if you read it. Your folks call it Necronomicon." "Fine. Hey bartender, *Read Menu* give me… uhh… This one make sense, a U-Boot… please?"The building begins to shakes and rotate it self. -----------------------------------------  “Huh? The monster is rotating! Is it trying to turn all the audience insane!? Close you eyes folks! Except me of course! I see enough poo poo in my lifetime that nothing can-“  --------------------------------------  "Good job, bro! It seem the U-boot is for turning the Lionwheel around! I wonder what the other drinks or combination do? It seems like there is a pattern or rule base on the cocktail’s name? What next?"--------------------------------------  “Ughh, I will need to see a therapist after this! But not until I declare - START!”
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Oct 5, 2018 14:10
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Jaegar Shot, Irish Carbomb, and RED DEATH in that order should be significant enough to do something. AVOID KAMIKAZE
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Oct 5, 2018 15:11
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B-52 Followed by Alaska Thunderfuck 5000.
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Oct 5, 2018 22:31
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Toughy posted:Jaegar Shot, Irish Carbomb, and RED DEATH in that order should be significant enough to do something. This
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Oct 6, 2018 02:06
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Good luck my
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Oct 6, 2018 08:05
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 “A Jaegar Shot, please?” I ordered from the menu with a hand that isn't my own. Who hand does this belongs to? It's soft and have jewelry, so it should be a woman's hand, but why? Could it be part of the menu selection function? Such triffle matters are not my main concern anymore as the announcer started the match. I can only hope the name actually meant Jaguar – The high-speed lion-like animal that I saw on TV before.  All participant already zooming away at incredible speed! Yet, the Lion wheel remain as the bartender makes the cocktail at normal pace. I wanted to ask it to hurry it up, but we are talking about a lion here.  Finally, I was ready to grab on the cocktail and down it all with in one go! Those other participate already reaches the rising roadway!  Then the bartender drank it. “WHY!?” I burst out yelling at what is going on! Isn’t the cocktail for me!?  Ignoring my protest, the lion-headed bartender instead take out an old style rifle under the bar table and take aim to fires one loud, but normal sounding gunfire noise. “Bro! I just looked it up, Jaegar is German for Hunter! The drink means Hunter’s shot!” The bartender already put away the gun and return to its glass wiping routine. The giant Lion Wheel still haven’t move. “WHOA! SOMEONE GOT SHOT!” The loud announcer shouted in surprise! “Something from that lion monster hits the Knee of the archer discipline of Buckeye! He fell of the long dragon like a marked buck!” He continues after an impressed whistle. “That might be the best shot against the rider of the long dragon since it wiggle-swims in the air like a fish and he would be a good knee to stay balance! Is the representative for the God of Archer going to retire!?” The other racers already quarter way up the road to the sky! The Lion wheel is still not moving! Dammit! I frantically search the menu again for anything remotely related to moving, but they all sounds like dumb names made up by a bunch of drunks! “The Evil Representative of… ‘Cool Dude’, remain stationary at the same starting spot!” The announcer commented warily, and then a surprised sound of his continues. “Could it be!? That monster is here to kill off his competition and win by default!?” Advisor Snake Bro already reacted ahead of me. “I know what you are thinking, bro.” “I know how right it feels to do it. To win.” “But think about it, this isn’t war, it’s a friendly competition! There is no need for excessive force!” “Don’t order the Kamikazi!” THAT’S NOT WHAT I AM THINKING AT ALL! I shouted internally, wasting precious seconds flies away as the gap between those racers increases. Moreover, I don’t really care about winning! I said I would try, but this thing isn’t moving and I am not killing anyone!” “Uh, bro?” "All I wanted was something normal for once! Something entertaining and I can do wheel! And guess what! I am drinking in a bar! Trying not to become a murderer in a friendly competition!" “Bro!” "I know this is bad luck, but why can’t I fail at NORMAL THINGS! Like driving a truck, I mean, that’s how I get here, but is surely worse than what? Chocking to death on my next cocktail!?" “BRO! WE ARE IN DANGER!” "Wha-" “Woaahh!” The announcer shouted with excitement! “Looks like the Discipline of the Archer God is has abandoned try to get back on the race to have his revenge!”  I seen that before. That same giant flaming arrow killed my bros last time! Of course! The Archer God would have something obvious like that! “THAT MURDERER! BRO! WE MUST REVENGE FOR BROS!” "YOU drat RIGHT I AM GUTTING THIS rear end in a top hat! GiMME AN IRISH CARBOMB!”  At the very same moment, that giant flaming arrow is release to the lionwheel! Within the span of three seconds, the arrow flew through the paw of one leg and burned it to ash, but thankfully did not penetrate into the main body. The lionwheel roar in pain and begins to move and shake around in forward or backward. Thankfully the center of gravity in the pub stays the same even when the lionwheel rolls around.  The drat bartender made the next drink at the same pace as before! Does the bartender have no sense of self-preservation!? Tarcher’s fire arrow is charging into giant size again and will be release any moment now! This time he can hit us here by aiming for the gap where the one of the leg used to be! Can I jump off this thing!? I want out!  It’s done.  It’s charged.  
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Nov 2, 2018 16:26
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  The Irish Car Bomb is a thing of beauty.  Its deep dark brown color revels in its truly classical impression of what you expects from a beer, and makes one jump on their feet from their revelry of dark emotion.  If one where to stares at the darker side of this drink as if from behind, its (alcoholic) content would surely drove the unfortunate witness into the drunken insanity.  Not even the agent of heaven can handle the surprise of the Irish.  Coming out of nowhere, as if releasing it through the brownish side of the void, Its elegant arrangement and complimentary shade is the perfect dais for the drop of Irish Cream to-  Burst on top the drink to create a whiten foam of magnificence contrast with the deep classical brown.  The foamy debris of the bang did not sinks, no, it hovers above the drink like it loves to stick with clingy embraces to its new found partner of liquid pigment.  Together, they both resulted in this sweetly strong alcoholic beverage that would stink the poor nose of a weak alcoholic. Truly, an Irish Car Bomb to the senses who can’t handle its powerful fragrance of the classic that remains strong in its aroma regardless of its prestige old age. A fine expression of lotus growing on top of mud.  Hey, Snake bro. Yeah, bro? Are we trying to win a race here or bring devastation to the contender? Why not both? Which one is faster? I want to go home already and I do not look forward to whatever Red Death will do. Obviously, it issssss-A) Destroying your foe’s will and physical attachment to the mortal realm would be faster! Look at them and majority of the audience leav- Oh, the audience are actually cheering. They probably don’t have nose. B) Go faster and win faster! C) Actually both. D) Drop out and go home. Then it’s the end for you. E) Write-in
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Dec 25, 2018 02:09
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Dec 25, 2018 03:25
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 13:25 |
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Would I grandfather into the final winner if all participants quit? I like what you think, bro. We will destroy them both in pride and willpower. ...The Red Death isn’t a nuke is it? That would be banal. Do not mistaken this fruity drink as an cocktail for the casual.  It packs a powerful punch that only a man with the courage of a lion can stomach its combination of five different spirits fruit flavors.  Oh, and it have vodka.  An inspirational alcoholic element for one to seeks for a return to the motherland.  The great sacrifice of our comrade will be remember in our heart.  Their unspoken bravery is a deserving honor to their homeland.  Their ascend to heaven as they cast aside the physical body is lamenting to the motherland, but to achieve victory and reached the end of the war, it is an act that is worthty of sacrificing twenty-three legs.  Those would witness the deed will shout with pride.  Yet, that is not all of it.  Sometime, the spirit of death seeks revenge for their fallen.  They arrives with great hatred, emanating its destructive aura for what feels like three days...  To end the Cold War. -------------  Congratulation, my champion. We have gotten 2nd place.  You look exhausted from the trial run. I see it through your soul since your physical body vaporized. So, Is this it? Do you have enough of this racing? More? Or do you wish to start in a whole new world with a different law and power in your disposal? Perhaps without racing? I can grant you this as the reward. Sorry, my face seem to be melting. You see, I am speaking to you in the middle of the explosion in the midsection of diluted dimension stream. I hope we are still Cool in this radiating melting heat. Bro, I think this racing thing is going nowhere in term of entertainment or standardized controllable mechanic. The gods might be running out of divine brain juice to keep this fun. What do you think?A) I have enough or not satisfy with this god B) Let’s try something new in another world. (New thread) C) Hell no, I want to race more! D) C, but make some changes to it. [Write-in] E) Write-in
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Jan 18, 2019 01:54
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