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Jeabus Mahogany
Feb 13, 2011

I'm mad because of a thorn in my impenetrable hide

Hello, I'm town

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Jeabus Mahogany
Feb 13, 2011

I'm mad because of a thorn in my impenetrable hide

peramene posted:

Jeabus Mahogany, I have seen you refuse to surrender in the face of adversity and put up with a tremendous amount of horseshit. I therefore ask you to be my defense counsel

okay

Hal Incandenza
Feb 12, 2004

Pro Eschaton Player



WHAT CONFIDENCE THIS INSPIRES!!!

Little Mac
Jan 3, 2006

Super Mario Bros 3


Please pick a Jury Foreman.

GulagDolls
Jun 4, 2011



pick me. I will choose guilty. then we will all vote guilty so I get the epic boon

Jeabus Mahogany
Feb 13, 2011

I'm mad because of a thorn in my impenetrable hide

Little Mac posted:

Please pick a Jury Foreman.

I will nominate 100YrsofAttitude.

Mordiceius
Nov 10, 2007

WILD AND PURE AND FOREVER FREE!


I don't even know how this stupid system works. I assume it sucks.

Little Mac
Jan 3, 2006

Super Mario Bros 3

100Yrs has been picked as Jury Foreman.

Please make your selection of GUILTY or NOT GUILTY for peramene. You may do so in private via PM or in public.

You must also choose today's Judge.

The Jury may still deliberate in the meantime.

Pinterest Mom
Jun 9, 2009



Mordiceius posted:

I don't even know how this stupid system works. I assume it sucks.

I'm going to be pretending this is just straight maf

Jeabus Mahogany
Feb 13, 2011

I'm mad because of a thorn in my impenetrable hide

LADIES. GENTLEMEN. OTHER LADIES. OTHER GENTLEMEN.

This day sees us all here to determine the veracity of our very souls in this, the noble court of law. The Gods have seen fit to decree that my honorable client, peramene, be the first to have their heart weighed upon the scales of justice. But I have vowed to defend my client's prestige, and I say WE NEED NO SCALES. My client's innocence is most surely self-evident. Lay your cases before me, and I, Defense Lawyer Jeabus Mahogany, shall knock them all down.

Jeabus Mahogany
Feb 13, 2011

I'm mad because of a thorn in my impenetrable hide

Anyway I'm off to bed now. G'night all

vector_to
Mar 7, 2013



Pinterest Mom posted:

I'm going to be pretending this is just straight maf

This, but also Phoenix Wright the poo poo out of it.

I like pera so far. they have moxie.

100YrsofAttitude
Apr 29, 2013

If I could have it back
All the time that we wasted
I'd only waste it again
If I could have it back
You know I'd love to waste it again
Waste it again and again and again

Jeabus Mahogany posted:

I will nominate 100YrsofAttitude.

I appreciate the thought. As such I will nominate PinterestMom to be our impartial judge.

100YrsofAttitude
Apr 29, 2013

If I could have it back
All the time that we wasted
I'd only waste it again
If I could have it back
You know I'd love to waste it again
Waste it again and again and again

Jeabus Mahogany posted:

The Gods have seen fit to decree ...

La´citÚ please.

100YrsofAttitude
Apr 29, 2013

If I could have it back
All the time that we wasted
I'd only waste it again
If I could have it back
You know I'd love to waste it again
Waste it again and again and again

As for my guess, and note it's a guess, I think peramene will be found Guilty. You seem like a blood-thirsty lot.

I stress it's a guess, because as always I wish to remain purely objective in the following proceedings. It's just the rabble I think we oughta fear.

100YrsofAttitude
Apr 29, 2013

If I could have it back
All the time that we wasted
I'd only waste it again
If I could have it back
You know I'd love to waste it again
Waste it again and again and again

And lastly, how can you, pera, so quickly declare your innocence? I want proof that you're a law-abiding citizen that no one has to fear.

To the others, pera seems to value hard-headed tenacity. Is fighting-like-a-caged-rat indicative of anything? Why would an innocent player not feel confident in putting their fate in the hands of the reliable state apparatus?

QuoProQuid
Jan 12, 2012


how often do you beat your wife, para

Tired Moritz
Mar 25, 2012

awww he's sleepy


rip perameme

Pinterest Mom
Jun 9, 2009



ty 100

Little Mac posted:

Community Service (x1) - Convicted player switches affiliation.

is it just me or is this incredibly broken

Tired Moritz
Mar 25, 2012

awww he's sleepy


whats stopping a scum to town from screaming the names of every scum member

peramene
Oct 13, 2015

In returns to come, remember
always and forever
that future,
your family, your people
they are worth the fight for.
If today the sands will it:
goodbye, my friend.


QuoProQuid posted:

how often do you beat your wife, para

My husband does the beating, he broke a loving riding crop across my back once. It was hot af tbh.

also idk but were you trying to make the "do you still beat your wife" joke??

With respect to the Foreman, I've seen the nittiest and the grittiest of life and let me tell you: my record isn't spotless. I have done bad things to good people. But I have turned over a new leaf, I did my time, and now I intend to contribute to society in meaningful ways. But my past haunts me and our esteemed jury is quick to judge, especially upon the first day of proceedings - which means I need tenacious counsel.

I'd like to enter a plea of not guilty and, if convicted anyway, request a lesser sentence, such that I might have time to prove myself.

Diqnol
May 9, 2010



Slippery Tilde

GUILTY

b-minus1
Jul 24, 2008



Pinterest Mom posted:

Confirming that I am vanilla town

and extremely inclined to vote guilty sight unseen

Jonathan Fisk
Sep 6, 2010

Get your umbrella fella cause we blowin hella chedda


QuoProQuid
Jan 12, 2012


Yeah, I was trying to make a "Do you still beat your wife" joke, but I hosed it up because I am dumb and not actually funny.

b-minus1
Jul 24, 2008



guilty with a lesser sentence sounds good to me. I'm always in favor of the allowing the accused the opportunity to defend themselves, especially this early in the game.

Pinterest Mom
Jun 9, 2009



a lesser sentence isn't in the cards here

Pinterest Mom
Jun 9, 2009



though, tbh, it might be better to kill someone else and have me use the cop on them instead? I assume I'll be protected by the doc tonight if that happens, so we can have the investigation results without needing the flip

Jeabus Mahogany
Feb 13, 2011

I'm mad because of a thorn in my impenetrable hide

100YrsofAttitude posted:

And lastly, how can you, pera, so quickly declare your innocence? I want proof that you're a law-abiding citizen that no one has to fear.

The onus is on the accuser to present the first evidence. Until that happens, I see no reason for my client to address this statement.

peramene posted:

With respect to the Foreman, I've seen the nittiest and the grittiest of life and let me tell you: my record isn't spotless. I have done bad things to good people. But I have turned over a new leaf, I did my time, and now I intend to contribute to society in meaningful ways. But my past haunts me and our esteemed jury is quick to judge, especially upon the first day of proceedings - which means I need tenacious counsel.

The fact that she has done so regardless is evidence that her soul bears no tarnish!


Please provide evidence to support your claim.

Tired Moritz
Mar 25, 2012

awww he's sleepy


wait, do we vote?? NOW???

Jeabus Mahogany
Feb 13, 2011

I'm mad because of a thorn in my impenetrable hide

Tired Moritz posted:

wait, do we vote?? NOW???

As far as I can tell, voting is just standard mafia voting with plurality.

Jeabus Mahogany
Feb 13, 2011

I'm mad because of a thorn in my impenetrable hide

Let's test it. ##vote Diqnol

QuoProQuid
Jan 12, 2012


Growing increasingly uncomfortable with the half-jokey drive against the defendant, especially as people start voting.


Also, what is stopping the town from systematically declaring people guilty and having the judge order a search on them?

100YrsofAttitude
Apr 29, 2013

If I could have it back
All the time that we wasted
I'd only waste it again
If I could have it back
You know I'd love to waste it again
Waste it again and again and again

b-minus1 posted:

guilty with a lesser sentence sounds good to me. I'm always in favor of the allowing the accused the opportunity to defend themselves, especially this early in the game.

There's a pragmatic side to this that appeals to me BUT


Pinterest Mom posted:

a lesser sentence isn't in the cards here

I don't think we really get anywhere without having some sort of leads. If we want information we'll have to generate something.

100YrsofAttitude
Apr 29, 2013

If I could have it back
All the time that we wasted
I'd only waste it again
If I could have it back
You know I'd love to waste it again
Waste it again and again and again

QuoProQuid posted:

Growing increasingly uncomfortable with the half-jokey drive against the defendant, especially as people start voting.


Also, what is stopping the town from systematically declaring people guilty and having the judge order a search on them?

Time?

Jeabus Mahogany posted:

As far as I can tell, voting is just standard mafia voting with plurality.

I feel a bit dumb then, does that mean we vote guilty/not guilty PLUS other people we find scummy?

Pinterest Mom
Jun 9, 2009



100YrsofAttitude posted:

I feel a bit dumb then, does that mean we vote guilty/not guilty PLUS other people we find scummy?

No, we vote for someone as normal. If Pera is dunked, she's found guilty and I get to take one of these actions.

quote:

5. The Judge renders his verdict. If the Defendant is ruled GUILTY by the Jury, the Judge must use one of his [SENTENCE] actions. [SENTENCE] actions include:
    Death (x∞) - Convicted player dies.
    Probation (x1) - Convicted player is jailed for the night.
    Community Service (x1) - Convicted player switches affiliation.
    Retrial (x1) - D.A. picks another defendant and the day begins again.
    Recess (x1) - Go directly to night phase. The Convicted player is the Defendant again tomorrow.
    Acquital (x1) - The Convicted player is ruled Not Guilty.
    Class Action (x1) - Convicted player dies. The day continues as LIGHTS OUT for 24 hours and all voted players immediately die.

If someone other than Pera is dunked, Pera is death proof for a day, and I get to take one of these actions on the player who gets the most votes.


quote:

If the Defendant is ruled NOT GUILTY by the Jury (due to another player receiving the most votes), the Judge must use one of his [INDICTMENT] actions. [INDICTMENT] actions include:
    Death (x3) - Convicted player dies. Please make note that this is only three-shot.
    Trial (x∞) - Convicted player becomes one of two Defendants for the next day.
    Search (x∞) - Convicted player's alignment is revealed to the Judge alone.
    Seizure (x1) - Convicted player becomes a stump. They do not flip or die, but lose affiliation, powers, and win condition.

Pinterest Mom
Jun 9, 2009



QuoProQuid posted:

Also, what is stopping the town from systematically declaring people guilty and having the judge order a search on them?

I think nothing, and that it's the correct play. In the absence of a result fingering someone as scum, put up a townie player as defendant, have someone else be the plurality vote, and have the judge investigate them

Mordiceius
Nov 10, 2007

WILD AND PURE AND FOREVER FREE!


INNOCENT

Diqnol
May 9, 2010



Slippery Tilde

Jeabus Mahogany posted:

Let's test it. ##vote Diqnol

Excuse me sir I believe you're voting for me when in fact your client is the guilty one and if you don't come around on this you can kiss those manager coupons for Applebees goodbye!

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Jeabus Mahogany
Feb 13, 2011

I'm mad because of a thorn in my impenetrable hide

Diqnol posted:

Excuse me sir I believe you're voting for me when in fact your client is the guilty one

Please provide evidence to support your statement.

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