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used to be i could steal photos of uggos from myspace, slap em up in my haunted whorehouse, and watch the clicks roll in. ahhh the cotton was high those days, the beans baked in their shells. used to be you could call a woman a whore and everyone would agree because nobody knew what a woman or a whore was. i miss how unaccountable my actions were when i had no concept of the world existing beyond my own highly orgasm-focused perception. everything is poo poo now. i tried staying up all night to finish secret of mana but i couldnt figure out how the fuckin ring based inventory system worked and fell asleep when it became 10PM. the first time i went on twitter someone used the word "fleek" and i got so mad i crushed my whole computer in an old-timey laundry mangler. what happened to the days when you could write "im haveing a accident" and everyone would love you. i had to put effort into a joke and strained literally every tendon in my body. i have to push my eyes back into my skull because my ocular nerves are no longer elastic. me and jerry sinefeld had dinner once, and after a rousing round of jokes about Polacks, he confided to me that his personal assistant once tazed his balls for the minor crime of jerking off into her hair while she slept. outrageous. out. rageous. i dont recognize this world anymore. i pray someday soon for my righteous wife lum to rise from her slumber and erase the corrupt institutions from the surface of the world with a wave of her massive giantesse hand. also i jerk off to lum giantesse fanart now. its not weird because i'm the one doing it, and i make fun of weirdos, so im not weird. #comedy #thegoodoledays #whenpeoplehadsensesofhumor |
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Oct 5, 2017 20:27
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| # ? Apr 23, 2024 13:46 |
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have you tried using a windows 95 theme and switching back to 26k to browse the 'net? really brings back those old timey feels. also websites will take so long to load that you'll lose interest before they start getting on your nerves.
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Oct 6, 2017 01:49
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