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Who's going to win this mess? This poll is closed. |
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| Our New Canadian Overlords |
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19 | 35.19% |
| East Hartford FC |
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0 | 0% |
| Better World Cup Odds Than the USMNT |
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3 | 5.56% |
| 28-3 |
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4 | 7.41% |
| gently caress Anthony Precourt |
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9 | 16.67% |
| Our DV8 Doesn't Have a Brass Pole in It |
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5 | 9.26% |
| We're Not Repeating, Don't Vote for Us |
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5 | 9.26% |
| That Other...OTHER Canadian Team |
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2 | 3.70% |
| Only Palatable with Vodka |
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3 | 5.56% |
| Rock You Like a Hurrica...nevermind |
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3 | 5.56% |
| We Have the *Best* Luck in Away Knockout Games |
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0 | 0% |
| gently caress Chris Wondolowski for Belgium |
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1 | 1.85% |
| Total: | 54 votes | ||
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 Toronto FC are the 2017 MLS Cup winners and have pulled off the first treble in North America Seriously, the East looks so much better this year top to bottom it's astounding. It would take a plague hitting everything east of the Mississippi but somehow missing New Jersey to host this year's final. Anyway....awwwwww poo poo y'all, it's yet another installment of gently caress You Eurosnobs, This Is America and in America We Have Playoffs. Unlike last year, this year both finalists actually made it to the playoffs. Toronto was apparently a bit miffed over losing the Cup to PKs after a scoreless draw so they decided to hatefuck the rest of the league into a record-shattering season. Let's see if they can do it for a few more weeks. As for Seattle...they matched the rest of the West by looking entirely unimpressive for the most part, but somehow got a #2 seed out of it. So, same format as the last few years: single game knockout not involving the top two seeds (away goals: off), then re-seeded home-and-away series for the conference semis and finals (away goals: on), then single game Cup final at whoever had the most points (away goals: off). Participants Eastern Conference Toronto FC Western Conference Seattle Sounders Knockout Round #5 Columbus Crew at Atlanta: 0, Columbus: 0, Crossbar: 5. Columbus advance on PKs 3-1 thanks to Zack Steffen standing on his head. #6 New York Red Bulls at Red Bulls score roughly as many goals as there were fans in attendance in Bridgeview, win 4-0. The worst loving match possibly this entire season finally ended with Houston scoring the lone goal in the first half of ET. I want those 120 minutes back. San Jose tried give up more points than the Dodgers tonight, still lost. 5-0 Vancouver. Conference Semi-Finals and Finals (Away Goals are used during these phases only) Semi-Finals #1 Toronto FC vs. Leg 1 (@NYR, Oct 30, 7PM ET, FS1): Giovinco is pretty good at free kicks y'all. 2-1 Toronto Leg 2 (@TOR, Nov. 5, 3PM ET, ESPN): A gazillion cards, 2 players sent off at halftime for trying to kill each other in the tunnel and one very fluke goal. 1-0 NYRB Series ends 2-2, Toronto advances on away goals (2-1) Leg 1 (@CLB, Oct 31, 8PM ET, ESPN): This game had a little bit of everything: center ref change, red card, atrocious keeping, players sliding everywhere, very loud swears and clown car goals. 4-1 Crew Leg 2 (@NYC, Nov. 5, 5PM ET, ESPN): Crew decide to almost gently caress themselves over by not really showing up. 2-0 NYC Columbus advance 4-3 on aggregate Leg 1 (@HOU, Oct 30 9:30PM ET, FS1): Another loving shitshow. We really need to go single leg for this. 0-0 Leg 2 (@POR, Nov. 5, 7:30PM ET, FS1): I missed a good chunk of this, but goals actually happened this time. Just not enough for Portland. 2-1 Houston Houston advances 2-1 on aggregate #2 Seattle Sounders vs. Leg 1 (@VAN, Oct. 29, 8:30PM ET, ESPN): 1 loving shot on goal total. Sorry everyone who watched this. 0-0 Leg 2 (@SEA, Nov. 2, 10:30PM ET, FS1): Deuce lives up to his name and drops a brace. Vancouver gets 1 SOG for the entire series. 2-0 Seattle Seattle advance 2-0 on aggregate Finals #1 Toronto FC vs. Leg 1 (@CLB, Nov 21, 8PM ET, ESPN): Columbus strategy of "let's not score any goals with Toronto missing Jozy and Seba" seems like it didn't work. 0-0 Leg 2 (@TOR, Nov 29, 7:20PM ET, FS1): A one-armed, one-eyed, one-legged Jozy Altidore finishes a sublime sequence from Toronto for the series' only goal. Toronto advance 1-0 on aggregate #2 Seattle Sounders vs. Leg 1 (@HOU, Nov 21, 10PM ET, FS1): Away goals FTMFW! First ever victory in Houston! Two Houston players suspended for leg 2...along with 1 of ours  2-0 SeattleLeg 2 (@SEA, Nov 30, 10PM ET, ESPN): ALL THE HOME GOALS!!!!1111 3-0 Seattle Sounders advance 5-0 on aggregate MLS Cup (Dec 9, 4PM EST/5PM PST, ESPN/TSN/UniMas/TVA) Not a repeat of last year's game...unfortunately. 2-0 Toronto, your MLS Cup champs MLS Cup Final host will be whichever team is highest on this list: Toronto FC Seattle Sounders ------------------- Teams below this line can't host Weird poo poo on the field that's not soccer lines NYCFC - The Yankees thankfully did not make the World Series (so 2017 isn't 100% terrible), so NYCFC has all of Yankee Stadium to themselves Seattle - Seahawks have home games on the 29th (day before leg 1 of semis), 5th (leg 2 of semis) and 20th (day before leg 1 of finals). Leg 2 of the semis, which they host, has been moved up to the 2nd, so wouldn't expect any lines there. If it's SEA-POR for the West finals then they'll be hosting leg 1, so could see lines here, otherwise they'll host leg 2 and have no conflict. Toronto FC - The CFL playoff schedule doesn't clash, should be safe here. whypick1 fucked around with this message at 01:05 on Dec 11, 2017 |
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Oct 22, 2017 23:28
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 01:46 |
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I want to see a treble.
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Oct 22, 2017 23:32
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all-Rush mixtape posted:I want to see a treble. i think we all do
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Oct 22, 2017 23:43
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That is a DV8 reference only a Portland native could get behind.
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Oct 22, 2017 23:59
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Hahahahahahahahahahaahahahahaha FC Dallas hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha FC Dallas til I d-- 
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Oct 23, 2017 00:20
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Azerban posted:i think we all do That's probably inevitable, let's be honest. But I'm still hoping for an MLS final played in non-arctic conditions so go Atlanta
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Oct 23, 2017 00:36
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GO REVS GO REVS G...oh. Um.
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Oct 23, 2017 00:42
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lol KC gonna lose against Houston #savethecrew and all that, but I would bet Atlanta gonna win that one pretty easily too
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Oct 23, 2017 01:07
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At last, the league no longer has to deal with Olsen’s Own
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Oct 23, 2017 01:19
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How the gently caress has the league not yet announced which playoff games are on which day?
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Oct 23, 2017 01:52
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A few of the dates are trickling in. The game the Sounders host will be on the 2nd, so (probably) no football lines.
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Oct 23, 2017 02:01
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Kilson posted:How the gently caress has the league not yet announced which playoff games are on which day? they had to wait and see who was going to host what games and then figure out how to avoid conflicting schedules with NFL, MLB, etc
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Oct 23, 2017 02:03
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Crew are going to get sacrificed on the altar of MLS 3.0 for Anthony Precourt. But seriously I have no hope of winning @ Atlanta. #SaveTheCrew anyway.
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Oct 23, 2017 02:13
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TwoStepBoog posted:they had to wait and see who was going to host what games and then figure out how to avoid conflicting schedules with NFL, MLB, etc Shouldn't they have done all that ahead of time for the various possibilities? Plus, there aren't any conflicts with MLB at all, or for the NFL on Wed/Thurs this week. Kilson fucked around with this message at 02:28 on Oct 23, 2017 |
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Oct 23, 2017 02:26
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I love that the Quakes are in despite losing more games than they won and have a -21 goal differential.
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Oct 23, 2017 02:46
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Knockout schedule finalized: NYRB@CHI - Oct 25 - 8:30 PM ET - FS1, UniMás, TSN 3 & 5, TVAS CLB@ATL - Oct 26 - 7:00 PM ET - ESPN2, UniMás, TSN 4, TVAS SJE@VAN - Oct 25 - 10:30 PM ET - UniMás, TSN 1,3,4 & 5, TVAS 2 SKC@HOU - Oct 26 - 9:30 PM ET - UniMás, TSN 4, TVAS
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Oct 23, 2017 02:47
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Aggro posted:I love that the Quakes are in despite losing more games than they won and have a -21 goal differential. Quakes were hot garbage for a lot of the season, but the game today was outstanding. Maybe... Maybe...
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Oct 23, 2017 06:59
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I am going all in on the Quakes. I put my entire faith in complete chaos. Run the loving (playoff) table.
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Oct 23, 2017 08:00
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porkface posted:That is a DV8 reference only a Portland native could get behind. And it takes a Portland native to make that reference... ...says the guy who lives in Vancouver because he likes his <10 minute commute, no income tax and being able to pump his own gas like a goddamn adult
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Oct 23, 2017 08:25
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They have a bracket builder up where you can win a trip to the 2018 All Star Game  I think I'd rather come in 2nd and win free season tickets and a 2k concessions gift card; 200 beers is a hell of a lot more useful. http://bracket.mlssoccer.com
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Oct 24, 2017 19:44
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whypick1 posted:And it takes a Portland native to make that reference... See the downside of that strategy is that you have to live in the drat Couve. Burgerville and sadness.
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Oct 25, 2017 02:49
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TwoStepBoog posted:lol KC gonna lose against Houston Our goalkeeper is dead so yeah
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Oct 25, 2017 16:52
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shirts and skins posted:See the downside of that strategy is that you have to live in the drat Couve. Burgerville and sadness. having to drive a bunch to be social is a pain in the rear end, and there's nothing in the Vancouver 'burbs. enjoy pumping your own gas tho.
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Oct 25, 2017 22:05
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Vancouver (the bigger, slightly less boring Vancouver) Should Win Tonight but I thought that ten days ago and now look where we are. Surely Tarbell can't steal ANOTHER game, right?
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Oct 26, 2017 01:13
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Go Fire! 
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Oct 26, 2017 01:33
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Schweinsteiger's not dead apparently, but is on the bench. edit: That is one sparse-rear end crowd. whypick1 fucked around with this message at 01:41 on Oct 26, 2017 |
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Oct 26, 2017 01:34
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Stadium is so empty I thought the Red Bulls were at home.
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Oct 26, 2017 01:40
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Getting into Toyota Park on time is drat near impossible. Also, go the Fire
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Oct 26, 2017 01:42
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Get innnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!
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Oct 26, 2017 01:45
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HOW DO OFFSIDE TRAP WORK 
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Oct 26, 2017 01:45
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Shrapnig posted:Stadium is so empty I thought the Red Bulls were at home. Lol Also that's some bad goalkeeping, but good chip pass
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Oct 26, 2017 01:46
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Well. gently caress.
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Oct 26, 2017 01:46
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Awful defending, awful goalkeeping, great pass
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Oct 26, 2017 01:46
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Oct 26, 2017 01:49
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Deep dish isn't pizza!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Oct 26, 2017 01:49
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gently caress yeah Red Bulls!
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Oct 26, 2017 01:49
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Center backs real bad
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Oct 26, 2017 01:49
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Pinwiz11 posted:Well. gently caress. Well, fuckity gently caress.
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Oct 26, 2017 01:50
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Lol well this started poorly
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Oct 26, 2017 01:50
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 01:46 |
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I would like the referee to not wear yellow for the second half since 2/3 of the Red Bulls kit is yellow.
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Oct 26, 2017 01:51
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