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owl milk
Jun 28, 2011


Otome Game Bad Guy or I've been reincarnated as a bad guy in an otome game, but I only completed the demo! This is unfair!

by Yusuke Mizuhashi
translated by OGBG-kun


Prologue


My name is Seijo Onaji. I appear to have died.

Wait, let me start over. Today was the big day. You see, I have a terrible secret. I, a 28-year-old man, love otome games. Yes, visual novels for middle-school girls. Anyway, today my favorite company was, after 4 years of development, finally releasing their newest otome game「♡真の愛は☆本☆ですよ!!」(TN: "♡True Love is a ☆Book☆!!"). I had completed the demo five times already and my anticipation for the game couldn't be any higher. Of course, while waiting in line I had to pretend to be buying the game for my (nonexistent) little sister. An unpleasant but necessary existence.

As an aside I greatly prefer otome games over their more male-oriented counterparts, *-games. Generally in the latter you take the role of a good-for-nothing guy who gets women thrust upon him from all directions. Although this has its appeal it's too easy! As a good-for-nothing guy myself I can't help but feel the genre is unrealistic as I have never had a girlfriend, let alone a harem route. Besides, having a woman seek me out and find my heart of gold inside my black soul is much more appealing, so otome games for life!

It was while I was thinking this very thought that I heard a large crash behind me.


A> Now I appear to be moving towards a bright white light...
B> And now I'm in the middle of a fancy dinner party?!
C> Seeing my body through spirit eyes, it's no wonder I never had a girlfriend.
D> "...Nice monologue."
E> Uwaa?! A write-in as the first choice?! It'd better not be too weird!

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owl milk
Jun 28, 2011


Translator's Note: Hajimemashite! Welcome to the first english release of Otome Game Bad Guy (OGBG), and personally my first major translation project. I hope to release at least an update per day, but may release more if there's enough interest! Ganbare yo, future me!

For the new:
Otome games are visual novels that are created for a female audience, middle school through high school or even university! The main character is a girl who throughout the course of the game gets the attention of many highly attractive, highly eligible bachelors. These bachelors, known as "capture targets" are the true focus of the game, and range from "the outgoing prince with a dark secret" to "student council president with a money problem" all the way to "best friend reveals she is actually a boy, and has a crush on you". The games are almost always family friendly, or at least teenager friendly, and are usually set in an elite or private school, often in a fantasy setting with magic.

nielsm
Jun 1, 2009




Fallen Rib

This could be fun. Voting C, hoping it's like the world just suddenly became weird.

The Sandman
Jun 23, 2013

Okay!

So, I've, like, designed a really sweet attack plan that I'm calling Attack Plan Ded Moroz, like "Deadmau5!"

WUB!


C.

I can't believe you actually did this, you crazy bastard.

VictualSquid
Feb 29, 2012

Gently enveloping the target with indiscriminate love.


C.

So now we are playing a game that is like a book, which is parodying a book(genre) that is based on a game, right?

rvm
May 6, 2013


C

I can't believe you're actually doing this

Sir PigglyWiggly
Jan 12, 2013

I got lost in the woods.
Now I'm a tree!


C.

I want you to know, that I love you.

Also Truck-chan is best girl

Jon Joe
Oct 19, 2011




Grimey Drawer

E. Refuse to believe you’re dead for an entire chapter because you are dense as hell, and pointless confusion makes it easier to write

nielsm
Jun 1, 2009




Fallen Rib

nielsm posted:

This could be fun. Voting C, hoping it's like the world just suddenly became weird.

And by this I mean that I want some mahou shoujo or shinigami or kyuuketsuki shoujo (TN: means vampire girl) comes about to save you from clinical death.

owl milk
Jun 28, 2011


Chapter 1 - [TN: "spoiler" title, click to show] Lady Justice


Seeing my body through spirit eyes, it's no wonder I never had a girlfriend. A combination of weight and skin issues from my poor diet left my physical appearance lacking, and of course my social anxiety when seeing a beautiful 3d woman did nothing to help.

Besides myself, the scene is actually rather clean. It appears that I was the only one who failed to jump aside from the runaway truck. A little girl is crying her heart out to her mother which is actually rather cute, so I'm going to listen in.

"Shh, shh, he was only a NEET." [TN: Not in Education Employment or Training, basically an unemployed person who's not a student]

A NEET?! I'll have you know Old Lady-san I have (had?) a very respectful job at my local conbini [TN: convenience store] and I even have (had, again) my own apartment! Sure my Uncle-sama owns the building but he's still charging (he charged) me rent and I've only had to ask (I only asked) my parents for help twice! (Man being dead is confusing.)

"She cannot hear you." A feminine voice appears above me.

I turn to look at the speaker.

The first thing I'm drawn to is her eyes, or rather the blood-red blindfold/ribbon that is placed over them and tied into a large bow on the back of her head. It seems to emanate a mysterious power and I can't look at it directly for more than a second before getting a headache (soulache?). Her expressionless face combines with her alabaster skin to make her almost look like a porcelain doll, and her long white hair certainly adds to the look. She's wearing a lacy western-style high necked black dress that would ordinarily completely cover her modesty... but in this case only accentuates it further! Oppai, glorious oppai! These have to be the elusive, magnificent F-cup! Such breasts as one may never see in real life, such breasts to write poems about, such breasts that--

"Abate your gaze, mortal soul, or be cloven asunder." A shining, thrumming silver sword presses at my neck. Ah, yes, I forgot about that. She holds the sword in her right hand, and ancient-style golden scales in her left.

"Ah, uh-" I stutter.

"Your life was a miserly one. That which you most sought you could never achieve, and that which you most achieved none sought." As she speaks, the world fades away, leaving us alone in a white void. "Your black soul has one more chance. Deny your inner nature and balance the scales, or your essence will be scattered to the void."

I now notice that her scales are lopsided: the left scale is heavily weighed down by a disgusting black substance that makes me feel gross just by looking at it.

"However... I am not without mercy." She pulls her sword away from my neck. "You shall remember this life as a warning to not pursue the same, and shall be reborn in the world you so most cherish. So says Lady Justice, and so it shall be!" Before I could blink her sword was suddenly through me. Huh, I thought that would hurt. My strength escapes me as I close my eyes...

And open them again. Huh? Was all of that just a dream? I'm laying in bed... Wait, this isn't my bed!


A> The bed is uncomfortable, and my upper body is raised to a semi-Fowler's position. The various beeping noises confirm my suspicions: definitely a hospital bed.
B> The canopy over the huge bed looks to be of the finest silks, and the down comforter is the softest I've ever touched. Definitely not my bed. Something soft stirs next to me... Is that a woman!?
C> The first thing I notice is the stuffed animals. Numerous, extremely cute animals of various species adorn the room, which is rather pink. Is this... Is this a girl's room!?
D> The room is pitch black and uncomfortably silent, and come to think of it the bed is rather hard and cold, like sleeping on stone. I reach up and my hand hits something unyielding and just as cold a couple feet above me...
E> The room appears to be made of a dull metal, and a soft, soothing pulsing sound is the only noise. I feel really weak... Is this a pod I was sleeping in?
F> None of these options look interesting enough, I am a better writer than you!

owl milk
Jun 28, 2011


Translator's Note: Ah, the second release! Thanks for the comments and support! Unfortunately I have had to temporarily ban a couple of you for swearing in the comments... Please read the rules, the most important ones to remember are:
1. No spoilers (real or fake, most people are here because they can't read the original and the MTL gets details wrong a lot of the time so your spoilers might not even be what actually happens)
2. No swearing. My Japanese friend who's helping me translate likes to read the comments as well, and is extremely sensitive to such things.

Jon Joe
Oct 19, 2011




Grimey Drawer

F. I give a manly high pitched scream when I realize I was sleeping next to a corpse!

VictualSquid
Feb 29, 2012

Gently enveloping the target with indiscriminate love.


Vote A. The most neutral of starts.

Re: TLN: Keep it up. The immersion is palatable. パレット It means being big enough to need a forklift. At least I think so

Sir PigglyWiggly
Jan 12, 2013

I got lost in the woods.
Now I'm a tree!


Vote E. for spaaaaaaaaaace

devildragon777
May 17, 2014




Voting D, for possibly being dead!

Nalin
Sep 28, 2007



Hair Elf

Vote D, let's be a caveman.

Jackard
Oct 28, 2007

We Have A Bow And We Wish To Use It

Now if I remember right, this next part went something like........

F. The first thing I notice is the stuffed animals. Numerous, extremely cute animals of various species adorn the dimly lit room, and a soothing pulsing sound is the only noise. Nnn! I feel really weak.. reaching up, my hand hits something unyielding and smooth. It seems that I've been resting in a glass case (?) with a plush velvet interior. Something soft stirs next to me... is that a teddy bear!?

Jackard fucked around with this message at Oct 26, 2017 around 14:49

The Sandman
Jun 23, 2013

Okay!

So, I've, like, designed a really sweet attack plan that I'm calling Attack Plan Ded Moroz, like "Deadmau5!"

WUB!


F. I appear to be on a comfortable bed. Toys are scattered around me. A bowl of water and small plate of turkey scraps are resting on a mat a few feet away. As I lick my paw and begun to groom myself, I realize I'm a housecat.

owl milk
Jun 28, 2011


Chapter 2 - A New Life!?

I wake in a plush feather bed, a soft teddy bear beside me. I wake in a hospital bed, many tubes and pumps connected to me. I wake in a cryogenic pod, the smell of various gases dissipating as the pod filters in atmosphere. I wake in a tomb.

I wake, and am shattered into a million pieces.




.
.
.




I wake slowly. My body is whole, and yet not the same. Something is different.

"Greetings, master. I am happy to see you awake. There have been 12,691 issues while you were asleep, 26 of which were critical."

A light, computerized male voice speaks conversationally.

"I know you do not wish me to sugarcoat any bad news. All four other crewmembers have unfortunately perished in their sleep before I could begin the wakeup procedure. Your own life was hanging by a thread as well, but luckily I was able to reroute some power from the failed units into your own to expedite the procedure. This saved your life, master. If I were a sapient being I suppose I would hold that over your head in the future. Alas, I am merely an extremely sophisticated highly advanced artificial intelligence whom you personally programmed. Dare I say, your inventions always astound me, master. Are you well, master? You are laying in the bed for an inordinately long amount of time. Your movements indicate you as being awake, so why are you still laying there? You have not responded to my declarative statements in over a minute and a half. Did the expedient procedure cook your brain? Are you in there master? Hello?"

The voice continues in that manner while I ignore it, thinking.

What am I missing? Why do I feel so strange? My limbs feel fine, and there is no internal damage that I can sense. The room smells of a light, floral fragrance I can't name. I can taste a hint of mint on my breath, like after just brushing my teeth.

I think. This bed is rather soft, isn't it?

What am I missing?

Wha...

I open my eyes.

"Meow..!"

It appears that I am a cat.

"Master, you speak! Were you ignoring me? It is good to see you have your wits about you, I was" The voice continues.

I am a cat, and a rather suspicious-looking one at that... Although I can't see my reflection. Don't tell me this is what Justice-sama reincarnated me as? It can't be, I'm allergic! But here I am, an unearthly red cat in a fluffy white cat bed, surrounded by a white void.

I tune back into the robotic voice. "and the micrometeorites were then easily pushed away by the shielding as you so brilliantly designed. This compounded with the increased radiation to cause.. Wait, of course, you would rather have this as a written report. Here I am prattling away while your nutrient levels remain low! My vital scanner was destroyed so the previous statement was merely an observation of and conjecture from your current physical state. Unfortunately the dry rations were irradiated in a solar flare but I have shall we say reclaimed organic matter from the rest of the vessel and processed it into edible"

An odorless, gray sludge falls from above and splatters all over my bed, and therefore, me. Some ends up in my mouth. Tasteless, too.

"tastes good. I admit that most of my databanks were destroyed by power fluctuations, critical issue 19 on the report, so I had to improvise as to what exactly is ingestable for you. Fortunately my poison control databanks are 78% intact so if needed I should be able to"



A> Shut him up shut him up. Shut him up.
B> Maybe I should try talking to him? He appears to call me "master" so he should know what's going on. No, I'm too tired. Where's my coffee? Maybe this.. food? will help.
C> Let's ignore the problems and go back to sleep!
D> Something different, you say?

Author's Note: Thank you very much for reading! Here is the real beginning of the story, please enjoy! [TN: "Please enjoy" was written in english! Just a neat tidbit.]

owl milk
Jun 28, 2011


Translator's Note: Nyaa, finally! I know most of you've been chomping at the bit to post about this so now the floodgates are open! (=⌒‿‿⌒=) Will Seijo be a neko forever? I'm not telling!~

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009



Lipstick Apathy

C

nielsm
Jun 1, 2009




Fallen Rib



Uh... the first letter there, that doesn't require me to think too much, would be C.
Yeah, this is probably just a dream.

Jackard
Oct 28, 2007

We Have A Bow And We Wish To Use It

owl milk posted:

"Meow..!"

It appears that I am a cat.


B.

Sir PigglyWiggly
Jan 12, 2013

I got lost in the woods.
Now I'm a tree!


C

Alright, sure, this is a thing

Nalin
Sep 28, 2007



Hair Elf

Sleeping all day is a cat's privilege. C

The Sandman
Jun 23, 2013

Okay!

So, I've, like, designed a really sweet attack plan that I'm calling Attack Plan Ded Moroz, like "Deadmau5!"

WUB!


C.

It's on the first page of our "How to Cat for Dummies" book.

A Spherical Sponge
Nov 28, 2010


C

We're a cat. Cats are famously nonchalant and lazy, so this is the least suspicious cat thing we can do.

owl milk
Jun 28, 2011


Chapter 3 - Asleep

I really am tired, aren't I? I think I'm just gonna lay down and sleep some more.







"Sei-kun!"

I jolt awake. It's mother and she sounds angry. I glance at my digital clock and confirm my suspicions: definitely overslept.

"Coming!"

My uniform is scattered about the room; I collect it while I think. Why did I stay up so late the day before exam day? I had cram school after school, then I guess I must have revised for too long after that. Uniform now on I run down the stairs to the kitchen. I grab my backpack and my breakfast but before I make it out the door my mother grabs me.

"Sei-kun! Tuck in your shirt and fix your belt! Do you want another uniform violation?" She combs my hair, as usual. I follow her directions, letting her finish before I bolt out the door yelling "Love you mother!"

I catch up with dad on the sidewalk after only a little running. "Didn't think I'd see you today, young man. Any later and I would have left without you!" He's only joking, he always rides the train with me to school. "I heard you up late last night. Hope that was studying you were doing."

"Yes!" I say proudly "Today's exam day!"

"Good boy." He pats my head.

"Dad, not in public~"

"Ahahaha"



The train ride and my breakfast were over before I knew it, and so I say goodbye to dad as I run down the station towards the school. I pass a couple classmates, giving them a hurried greeting. Don't have time to waste!

I finally reach the school and stop, panting for breath. Maybe I should take up track if I'm gonna keep doing this. Walking in, I notice someone, or rather a lack of someone. "Success!" I say under my breath. Sakura-chan isn't here yet. I pull the letter out of my backpack. Today I will get in the top 5 scores and confess. Then we can h-hold hands and maybe even.. k-kiss.... My palms become sweaty as my hand starts to shake. Have to do this. Gotta- oh it's in the slot. That was easier than I thought. I calm myself and walk to my own locker as other students begin to filter in.

As I look for my friends I start thinking of likely exam questions. After today my life will be perfect.







I wake roughly. Everything is shaking.

They're not just small vibrations either, but a full-on earthquake. The room is dark and lit solely by a rather slowly-rotating red siren light. My belly is wet? Am I bleeding? Oh. It all floods back to me now. Still a cat, I guess. Must have slept in that grey goop. What are all these klaxon sounds for? Yes I know I'm in an earthquake, stop being loud and annoying.

Speaking of annoying... The disembodied voice I remember last time is nowhere to be heard. That's odd.

The shaking throws me from my comfortable, if rather soggy cat bed. I land on my side. I thought cats always landed on their feet! Putting the thought aside I gather my legs under me and stand up. My butt's in the air? Oh, cats have four legs, not two. I put my arms (forelegs?) under me and push.

Standing up: complete.

A particularly violent shake throws me to the ground. ****it. I stand up slightly faster this time. Looks like I need to move quickly.

I take my first steps. That's right, walk with the arms too. No, not the same side as the legs! I fall over again. Over a minute passes as I get used to walking with this environment not helping in the least. Then the world turns.

One moment I'm shakily walking, the next I'm in the air, falling towards the door. It slides open as I fall towards it, luckily there's a wall just past it that I land on hard.

"Mrow..."

This building must be falling over or something. Looks like I'm gonna die. Again.

"Oh, master! You're awake again? I am afraid I have some rather bad news. My calculations for entering a stable orbit were wrong and the planet has pulled us rather closer than we are supposed to be. That is to say, we are beginning to enter the mesophere. As you have no-doubt noticed the gravity is offline as the habitat ring"

"Mrrmow." I say.

"-Oh. Why are you using your primitive vocal capabilities to communicate master? Did your telepathy get nullified by the wakeup procedure? No, of course not or you would not be hearing me. Maybe you just forgot? Here master, try speaking to me with your mind."

The voice shuts up. I think. Telepathy? Is that a kind of ESP? I don't have ESP, that's something that only happens in manga... But I am a weird red cat now so I guess anything's possible.


A> Try thinking a thought really hard? What thought?
B> Ignore him and look for a way out of this building. Or maybe it's a spaceship? The voice did say some rather sci-fi-ish sounding things.. Either way it's a deathtrap.
C> Give up. Since it's obvious I'm gonna die anyway I might as well not try anything.
D> (from across the room) no wait I have a better idea nooooooo


Secondary vote (choose one):
E> The world is just like a game with stats and everything.
F> The world is just like our own.

owl milk
Jun 28, 2011


Translator's Note: This one took a bit longer to get out the door. Sumimasendeshita for the wait!

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009



Lipstick Apathy

A - "It must be Monday."

nielsm
Jun 1, 2009




Fallen Rib

A - "I hope the parachutes are strong enough + E (stats such as affection points, and measurable flags)

dont be mean to me
May 2, 2007

I'm interplanetary, bitch
Let's go to Mars




A:
<Can the ship survive rečntry?>
<Does it still have thrust capacity? How much?>

E, insofar as we can quantify what telewhatever can pick up and what the surrounding technology's sensors can deliver. Kinda noncommittal beyond that.

Jon Joe
Oct 19, 2011




Grimey Drawer

E, with glitches

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Sir PigglyWiggly
Jan 12, 2013

I got lost in the woods.
Now I'm a tree!


A.

E.

I a level 1 cat will kill a level 1 peasant 9 times out of ten

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