Burger Thread II: Hold me Closer Tiny Smashburg

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Goons with Spoons > Burger Thread II: Hold me Closer Tiny Smashburg

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Don Dongington posted:

Love me some potato buns

Is that Coles burger sauce?

Is it good?

# ¿ Jan 31, 2019 13:07

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 23:42

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Don Dongington posted:

Woolworths. They're not always available, but they're usually near the brioche. Coles don't stock them.

Also the Coles burger sauce is fine. You can also make it yourself, it's just ketchup, mayo, bit of pickle juice and some dill usually.

I usually use the potato buns from Wooleys, or brioche from wherever (just not the Coles brand ones - ALDI brioche is supposedly the best); Coles Angus burgers with brisket - but I deform the patties into a big lump of Burger mince, divide into portions about 180-200g and smash onto cast iron; DairyLea burger slices for cheese and Fehlbergs hot and sweet chipotle pickles from Coles. Tomato and lettuce to taste.

I've heard good things about ALDI brioche rolls.

# ¿ Feb 3, 2019 12:04

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Big Willy Style posted:

Do chips from KFC have chicken salt on them in other countries?

I vaguely recall they do in Singapore

# ¿ Feb 5, 2019 02:23

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

I just went to a burger joint that markets itself as "asian fusion burgers" and names all their menu items after Dragonball Z characters and uses five spice mix on the chips.

It's a shame I didn't get any pics because they were pretty bloody decent

# ¿ Feb 12, 2019 06:26

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Piccolo is fries with aioli, seaweed flakes and sesame seeds, it doesn't look like there's a Krillin on the menu, but there is a Super Saiyan challenge burger with 8 patties, finish it in 15 minutes and get it free

edit: I'll get some burg photography next time I'm there

double edit: the place is JD's Burgers near Mont Albert station in Melbourne

Bargearse fucked around with this message at 09:36 on Feb 12, 2019

# ¿ Feb 12, 2019 09:31

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Don Dongington posted:

Actually living in Australia is going to a bespoke pop up boutique burger joint and paying $22 for a Shake Shack burger

don't go to Grill'd or Carls Jr and you should be in the clear

# ¿ Feb 14, 2019 11:12

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

iajanus posted:

Local takeaway burgers are the best burgers. With a lasagne topper on the side, obviously.

Yeah the best thing is when you walk into a random takeaway and walk out with the best burger you�ve ever had

# ¿ Feb 15, 2019 05:20

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Peter Dutton smiling is the creepiest goddamn thing I've ever seen

# ¿ Feb 20, 2019 13:22

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

The usual banh mi toppings would probably make for an amazing burg

# ¿ Mar 12, 2019 07:41

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Not gonna lie, I really like how Australia seems to have taken over the burger thread.

# ¿ Mar 13, 2019 15:00

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

iajanus posted:

Finally got to try Betty's Burgers

Just checked their website and found they have Melbourne locations, I know where I'm going for lunch this Saturday.

# ¿ Apr 24, 2019 15:51

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

The Kaiyoken Burger from JD's Burgers. Not bad at all, would have been better if they'd used fresh jalapeno slices but I guess you can't have everything.

# ¿ Apr 29, 2019 00:29

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

there�s room for both world views here imo

# ¿ Apr 29, 2019 09:02

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Please don�t fight, burger thread :ohdear:

# ¿ Apr 29, 2019 11:44

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Flash Gordon Ramsay posted:

I think jalapenos are the most dangerous pepper because sometimes they're like nothing, just fruity and slightly spicy and sometimes they just taste like burning. Kind of a crapshoot.

Yeah, most of the time they're pretty mild but every now and then you get a surprisingly powerful one.

# ¿ Apr 29, 2019 14:35

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

There�s a local burger joint that used to do shrimp burgs. They ended up taking them off the menu because they were costly to make and spoiled very, very quickly. Apparently some customers had gotten very sick from spoiled shrimp burgs.

# ¿ May 2, 2019 05:36

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Looks like one of those gimmick burgers that exist not to be ordered and eaten, but as a marketing move to get people in the door out of sheer morbid curiosity.

# ¿ Aug 11, 2019 12:21

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Xander77 posted:

No matter what recipe I used for ground beef burgers, the patties tend to fall apart a bit in the pan. Won't even try cooking them on a grill, because most of the meat would just fall apart and be lost to the coals.

Is there a secret technique / ingredient I'm missing?

The one that falls through the grill and into the coals is the sacrifice that guarantees the success of the rest of the burgs.

# ¿ Sep 20, 2019 15:37

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Have any other Melbourne burger enthusiasts been to Fat Bobs? What are your thoughts?

# ¿ Nov 2, 2019 12:58

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Trying Mr T�s a new burger joint that opened up recently in Croydon.

I hope it�s better than Happy Days, the other new burger joint in Croydon which is just loving awful.

# ¿ Jan 19, 2020 01:56

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 23:42

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Has anyone been to Flame Trees Burger Bar in Ferntree Gully, Melbourne? I just moved to the area and wondering if it's worth spending my hard-earned burger dollars there. The reviews seem to be good but I've had some pretty lovely burgers from places that got good reviews.

# ¿ Aug 15, 2020 14:43

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Goons with Spoons > Burger Thread II: Hold me Closer Tiny Smashburg