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It's that time of the year again where folks are returning to their lovely hometowns with naive excitement (only to remember very quickly why they moved so far away to begin with.) You're going to drink too much and you're going to get into debates that turn into arguments because your relatives are bigots or morons that voted for a man-child and a roving group of gremlins whose sole mission is to murder everyone and everything so they can have slightly more of something they already have too much of. You're going to hear and say stupid things and that's okay. Post about it here when it happens. Happy holidays, goons.  I'll start us off. My oldest brother taught his 5-year old to say "Trump is the greatest president ever." Got that in a voicemail.
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Nov 22, 2017 15:52
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 21:39 |
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Good Soldier Svejk posted:My oldest brother taught his 5-year old to say "Trump is the greatest president ever." Got that in a voicemail. lol that owns
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Nov 22, 2017 15:56
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we dont talk politics that much in my family, they're either at each others throat about some perceived slights in one case or rehashing the same old anectdotes from thirty years ago in the other
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Nov 22, 2017 17:41
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Tp7ZOb9Y4I
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Nov 22, 2017 17:43
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I heard that Trump had those pardon turkeys secretly killed so he could eat them and that there were two ringer turkeys sent to the farm in virginia I have a lot of team-conservative redneck relatives that I get along with famously in north carolina. I don't know who hates democrats more though, socialist me or republican them. Although I won't be seeing them until Xmas.
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Nov 22, 2017 17:47
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my extended family is weird, despite being pretty lower middle class white southerners in louisiana my grandfather who was the patriarch of the family was a liberal catholic. they had 6 kids and only one of my uncles bucked that and is republican, rest of them remain liberal. there was a larger debate about bernie vs hillary than about trump, who basically everyone except the one uncle (who got rich on austin real estate in the 90s and is now is a big time contributor to the tex GOP, hes very establishment republican frat boy type, generally avoids the rest of the family) agrees is terrible. i genuinely like getting together with my moms family because theyre all loud coonasses who drink a lot. my dads side is more standard southern baptist racist conservative, but its small and spread out across the south so we very rarely get together. before my parents got divorced the family politics fights would generally be between my dad and rich uncle vs the rest of my moms family.
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Nov 22, 2017 18:19
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I am spatchcocking a turkey for my wife and her friends who are visiting because gently caress going home
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Nov 22, 2017 18:23
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tomorrow i will be ignoring all attempts by my family to communicate with me instead i will be watching the mst3k turkey day marathon, thus effectively spending the day with a far more entertaining group of people with conflicting political views
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Nov 22, 2017 18:26
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https://twitter.com/cushbomb/status/933361482326269952
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Nov 22, 2017 18:56
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https://twitter.com/discomfiting/status/933009272757260289
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Nov 22, 2017 19:10
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time to go full tankie this thanksgiving
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Nov 22, 2017 19:13
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grandma, let me tell you the truth about syria,
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Nov 22, 2017 19:13
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Carving up this turkey reminds me of the way imperialist powers want to carve up syria. Luckily for us, this turkey isn't being protected by the lion assad, because if it was...
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Nov 22, 2017 19:20
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My family is all spread so out so I will be spending thanksgiving as the drunk in-law with my wife's family and her friends family. Also it's going to be 85+ degrees on thanksgiving so pool party motherfuckers
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Nov 22, 2017 19:20
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https://twitter.com/hello__caitlin/status/933403188161495040 it's da motherfucken share z0ne
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Nov 22, 2017 19:50
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That Thanksgiving is metal as gently caress.
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Nov 22, 2017 19:53
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my uncle's literally a southern baptist pastor. he's about as well-read/liberal as you can imagine one of them being, but still. he unironically likes the creation museum and voted trump because abortion bad  otoh he's very calm and mild-mannered and his family are the only relatives I have that has pretended to give a drat about me since my folks passed away, plus my cousin and her hubby are pretty cool and I have cute nephews thanks to them. sooooo I guess I'm gonna drive eight hours and eat a shitbird for the genocide holiday with em v  v
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Nov 22, 2017 20:38
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BrutalistMcDonalds posted:https://twitter.com/hello__caitlin/status/933403188161495040 https://twitter.com/Jordan_Stewart/status/933418864360247297 bizzaro trots
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Nov 22, 2017 21:35
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BrutalistMcDonalds posted:https://twitter.com/hello__caitlin/status/933403188161495040 da mothafuckin share z0ne!!!
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Nov 22, 2017 21:38
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https://twitter.com/DPRK_News/status/932716831814635522
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Nov 22, 2017 22:17
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Nov 22, 2017 23:43
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so all the food is fake and you might get sexually assaulted by 2/3 of its participants???????? a good diorama
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Nov 22, 2017 23:45
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what the gently caress is that a bust of? a fox?
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Nov 22, 2017 23:49
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Autism Sneaks posted:what the gently caress is that a bust of? a fox? its the golden fox of capitalism, duh
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Nov 22, 2017 23:52
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check out what your oaf up there on the right is doing with his "invisible hand" jerking off
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Nov 22, 2017 23:58
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I'm amazed how loving racist Oregonians can be while I'm sitting in the same room playing with their mixed-race blood-relative. Like goddamn go to another room at least
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Nov 23, 2017 00:33
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yall need a redneck radical family. just a bunch of drunks hootin and hollerin about football and politics chat is talking about how all the wall street jerks and CEOs and republicans should fuckin' hang
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Nov 23, 2017 00:48
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my folks are moderate democrats, I'm a flaming red, we don't argue much because everyone agrees that trump is a fuckman
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Nov 23, 2017 03:02
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BrutalistMcDonalds posted:https://twitter.com/hello__caitlin/status/933403188161495040 adding this to the "anti-socialism propaganda makes socialism look loving awesome" file
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Nov 23, 2017 03:56
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genuinely cannot tell if this is pro or anti muslim thanksgiving
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Nov 23, 2017 04:11
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I decided to make this thread so that fellow GAF members would have the tools necessary to deal with the kind of people that everyone knows: The deplorables. I'm gonna first preface this by saying that the method I am going to disclose is not meant for ALL Trump voters, but specifically the kind of deplorables who treat talk radio as gospel, constantly hate on all kinds of minorities, and when confronted with facts will almost always rely on conspiracy theories about how everything is supposedly rigged against them. This is NOT a method to be used for those that may be ignorant or misinformed but truly are open to learning new information. In fact this method is not even about changing the view points of deplorables, but is instead a method for the sole purpose of getting deplorables to shut the gently caress up about their bigoted views so that you can at least enjoy a decent meal. Others posting in this thread are certainly welcome to post their own methods. So with that disclaimer brought up, I will now explain what I call the Nuclear Political Discussion Option: One of the core tenants of liberalism is sensitivity is inclusiveness and tolerance, and it shows in how we usually discuss politics. We try to reason and empathize with the other side and it often can help but other times it can be to a detriment. So instead of dealing with deplorables with empathy and reasoning, my method is about making deplorables feel like poo poo. Now it won't have its impact of you go straight to this option, but the idea is that you give the deplorable or deplorables warnings that you are holding back a nastiness and if they don't back off they will feel that verbal wrath. Once you are actually starting the method, you basically talk to them in ways that prove that political correctness isn't just a one way road. The following are examples of phrases that are part of this tactic: - "Dumbass conspiracy theories" "here we go again with the dumbass conspiracy theories" "since you rely on dumbass conspiracy theories so much are you gonna next tell me about UFOs" - "man you seem really TRIGGERED by black and brown people" "do you need a safe space from all the Muslims you loving pussy?" "America is not your safe space from minorities you loving dipshit" - "oh here we go again with Benghazi. Are you gonna cry like that bitch Pattt Smith?" - "Oh I'm sorry I can't hear you when you have Trump's dick in your mouth" - "You sound like a loving wuss if you can't handle a black guy taking a seat during the anthem." - "Here let me pour one out for those POOR OL' PERSECUTED CONSERVATIVES" (then literally pour your drink onto the floor mockingly) - calling them "white trash" or otherwise bringing up the fact that they are white in insensitive ways. "Man you are whiter than my pair of New Balance" "well of course you think that, you're loving white" "no, the sheep are Trump supporters; you can tell because they are white" - When they call out your insensitivity, respond with "No I am just being politically incorrect, you loving dumb hypocrite." - Constantly ending your sentences with "dumbass", "dipshit", "loving idiot", and similar insults. These are little stings that will get under their skin. - Bringing up anything personal about them in an insulting way that would have political context. And that's just off the top of my head. If people want I can post more examples. Frequently/Inevitably Asked Questions: 1) This sounds like you are saying to be an rear end in a top hat? - Yes that is the point. Deplorables are used to having liberals trying to reason with them, so pushing back hard will throw them off because they won't be used to such visceral language coming from the liberal side. 2) What if the deplorable or deplorables get physically violent? - Always be prepared to defend yourself in any situation anyway. I'm not going to post what is okay for all 50 states, but I encourage that before thanksgiving you look up how you are legally allowed to defend yourself. EDIT: Just to be clear I am not advocating for violence and I do not condone violence. I am merely stating that if THEY assault you then you need to be prepared to defend yourself. 3) Why should I do this when it seems like it will never actually change their viewpoints? - This Nuclear Option is not meant to change their viewpoints. It is meant to make the opposition feel uncomfortable openly speaking their bigotry. 4) Have you actually tried this method? - Yes, both on social media and in real life. And for its stated purposes it works incredibly well, mainly because, as I said, it's not something that deplorables are used to hearing from liberals. 5) I noticed your examples have a lot of swearing and insults. Is that on purpose? - Yes it is on purpose. It drives home the idea that you have no respect for deplorables, which is essential if you are to successfully make a deplorable feel uncomfortable speaking politics around you. 6) Why are you making this thread in the first place? - Because I have seen post after post of GAF members dealing with deplorables and getting frustrated that they can't reason with the deplorables, so I figured I should make a thread so that they have some important tools to help make thanksgiving a more enjoyable meal.
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Nov 23, 2017 04:18
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my sister got drunk and started talking in a bad irish sing-song voice about mike pence saying that the young girls in alabama must be lovely to tempt such a man of god and then my dad who is also drunk started saying that actually dating 13 year olds was normal in alabama in the 70s so it's fine and how are the lying fake news only bringing this up now now they're talking about medical marijuana
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Nov 23, 2017 04:25
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Not Thanksgiving, but a couple years ago we hosted a Christmas Eve get-together at my parents' house. My oldest cousin was outed by his then-girlfriend's nine-year old son as having watched porn in front of the kid, and then he and his girlfriend got in a big fight about it. That cousin is currently the most vocal Trump supporter that I know. My immediate family is cool, my mom went woke Dem about a decade ago and my dad votes Republican but doesn't really believe in it. My mom's birthday was yesterday and I got her a mug that says "Covfefe" on it which she loving loves. Go woke mom.
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Nov 23, 2017 05:14
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Al! posted:so all the food is fake and you might get sexually assaulted by 2/3 of its participants???????? a good diorama 
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Nov 23, 2017 06:25
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BrutalistMcDonalds posted:https://twitter.com/hello__caitlin/status/933403188161495040 in a socialist world, american colonialism would never have happened and thus neither would thanksgiving. agc
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Nov 23, 2017 06:55
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I have one positive story, Trump broke my dad's brain out of the Fox News death spiral. He's voted R since I was born, but he's now on the "Bernie Would have Won" train. This is my first visit home where we talked about politics since the election and he ranted about how hosed up it was the entire drive from the airport to the house about how it should be President Bernie.
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Nov 23, 2017 22:39
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I'm having dinner with a bunch of strangers and they're all, presumably, liberal intellectual types.
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Nov 23, 2017 23:03
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Spent a while making fun of trump
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Nov 23, 2017 23:03
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My parents are also apparently on the Bernie would have won train but they also have spent a lot of time bitching about Soros and the Clintons.
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Nov 23, 2017 23:16
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 21:39 |
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I just pooped my pants at the dinner table to own my inlaws.
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Nov 23, 2017 23:29
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