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Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011

MAP 1|1: SALT --
MAP 1|2: RIME --
MAP 1|3: DROP --
MAP 2|1: DARK --
MAP 2|2: TOMB --

Female VO: Drone and Clone, Freak and Chic; when it's 11PM Solarian Standard and the weekly ethanol ration just deployed, you know it's time for...

Hazel: Good evening Diaspora! I'm Hazel Dang-Cobra Jr., and with me always is the Reverend Cawsey "Ocho" Rios, three time Micro-Grav Champion of the Hacktogon.

Cawsey: Good to be here, Hazel.

Hazel: Welcome once more to the stately Pleasure Dome! Where sins are absolved, and winners live forever!*. We've scraped the lowest depths of the slumstacks, prison colonies and long-haul exile freighters, and brought the hungriest, most desperate contestants to you, our precious baby viewer!

Cawsey: This series' contestants are hungry for that luxe, Hazel. They're failures, prisoners, and mutants all, wretched to the last, and some might say entirely beyond redemption, but they've poured everything they have into getting this one last chance at redemption, or at least a stay of execution.

Hazel: Well, this year's deadly rigs and lethal combat zones are going to make them work for it, that's for sure. The industry's best murderologists have slaved over their killing assets to make sure this is the best Wrecking Crew yet!

Cawsey: Strong words, Hazel. Strong, shapely words. I can't wait to see what toxic hellscape they dig up first. Hazel, are you ready for a scrap?

Hazel: You took the words right out of my script, Rev; I was decanted ready. Dust off the shattered wreckage of your life, precious babies, It's time for Wrecking Crew!

AUDIO: Neobaroque Crunkwave Instrumental
Female VO: Our mother Earth is a wasted heap, but that doesn't mean your life has to be! A bold new crop of contestants has arrived from all around the Diaspora looking for a chance to help reclaim our beleagered planet...and stack luxe to precarious heights. Contestants will dropped into a dangerous combat zone, riddled with hazards, enemies both mutated and mechanical, and precious, precious resources.
The goal? To reclaim salvage to bank precious Luxe, and to amass enough gear and power to take down the Zone Boss, a pants-making GBS threads Zodiac-Class Rig!
Go it on foot, or hop in a rig and ride to mechanized victory!
Impress the sponsors in hopes of a supply drop, or ride the night train as a dark horse!
Work together for a better tomorrow, or waste one another on sight, the choice is yours!

Female VO: Our Wreckers are sorted into five "classes" by a standardized set of metrics, and assigned starting loadout based on their class.


Female VO: Luminaries from around the Diaspora have gathered on Decree Station Alph to rub elbows and support their chosen Wreckers on the field of battle. Politicians, gangsters, titans of industry, and the fusest of celebs, all with their fingers on those drop-pod deployment consoles. Want to send medical aid to your embattled buddy? How about a fuel drop for a flagging fave? Or just order an airstrike and watch everyone eat poo poo; this is Wrecking Crew!

Wreckers: Make a post listing your name, portrait, class, and Orokos rolls for loadout. When you see your name and vitals on the broadcast, you're in!
Since the game is round-based, if you play a wrecker, you'll want to keep up.
The game updates every day except Wednesday and Sunday!

Sponsors: Just participate in the thread. If you don't have a Wrecker on the board, you can post as a sponsor! Wreckers will upload luxe from the combat zone that you can use to send materiel support...or "support"! RP in the thread, create experimental new items, and present bonus challenges for the players!
Unlike wreckers, sponsors have no expectation of involvement; jump in and out as you like!

Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Oct 22, 2018 around 19:24


Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011

Hazel: Cawsey, let's talk rules.

Cawsey: You know how I feel about rules, Hazel.

Hazel: That's between you, the judge, and your ex-husband, Reverend. Roll the vid.

AUDIO: Southern Vapor-Grind Instrumental
Female VO: The rules of Wrecking Crew are simple.

The Target Number is 4. Abilities and items may change this, but 4 is the default target number for any action, regardless of die size.

1. Sponsor Phase: Sponsor posters (anyone in-thead without a Wrecker on the board) will receive a 5 Luxe stipend every round (not phase) they post. They may pose challenges for Wreckers to complete, which will also grant sponsors bonus Luxe when completed. Luxe for purchases of Sponsor items will be deducted first from the sponsor's account, then from the client Wrecker's.

Sponsors may use their own or a Wrecker's uploaded luxe to purchase one of the items listed below at any time, which will be delivered during sponsor phase (with the exception of the Airstrike, which will occur during Hazard phase):

Supply Drop: Drops a crate granting a 1d20 roll on Supply in target zone. 25 Luxe.
Drone Delivery: Sends a specific Supply item to a specific Wrecker. 25+Supply Rating Luxe.
Experimental Items: Sends a hazardous beta version of an item with additional capabilities. Half Supply rating+25.
Exfiltrate Wrecker: Safely evacuates a Wrecker (but no items) currently occupying a Strato-Cradle. 25 Luxe.
First Exfiltrated Item: +10 Luxe.
Second Exfiltrated Item: +20 Luxe.
Additional Exfiltrated Items: +30 Luxe each.
Exfiltrate γ Rig: Evacuates a non-enemy γ rig currently occupying a Strato-Cradle. Does not include a Mounted wrecker. 25 Luxe.
Exfiltrate β Rig: Evacuates a non-enemy β rig currently occupying a Strato-Cradle. Does not include a Mounted wrecker. 50 Luxe.
Airstrike: Target a zone for aerial bombardment. Targeting may not be perfect. 50 Luxe.
Rig Drop (γ): Deploy a previously exfiltrated rig in target zone. 15 Luxe.
Rig Drop (β): Deploy a previously exfiltrated rig in target zone. 35 Luxe.


Introducing Exclusive Sponsorships!
Now, a Wrecker and a Sponsor may, by mutual agreement, enter into an Exclusive Sponsorship!
1. The Wrecker in question may not have their Luxe spent by anyone other than their Sponsor!
2. The Wrecker's Device is granted functionality to upload Luxe anywhere with an Action!
3. A Sponsor's stipend is increased to 10 on rounds when their Wrecker earns awards or bounties!

Exclusives may be ended at any time by mutual consent; a Sponsor may unilaterally end an Exclusive at any time, but a Wrecker must Litigate to do so.

2. Movement Phase: Wreckers may move up to their listed Move stat, unless halted by a revealed Encounter or Ambush.
Please CONCEAL your movements in your posts.
Aim – If no Movement is taken, subject gains one upscale on the next Encounter Phase.

3. Encounter Phase: Wreckers resolve any revealed encounters and engage in combat.
Boost – If no Encounter occurs, in the next Action Phase subject gains either +1 to any HP restoration, +1 Luxe per die on Salvage, the ability to make both a Wide and Tight Scan, or +1 to a miscellaneous ACT roll.

4. Action Phase: Wreckers capable of acting may take one of the following actions:

Salvage: Gain 1d6 Luxe. Salvage a defeated rig for 3d6 Luxe for a Gamma, or 6d6 for a Beta! Cannot be used in a contested zone.
Wide Scan: Reveal Wreckers, active Encounters, and certain hazards in adjacent spaces.
Tight Scan: Focus all sensors on one hex to reveal the number, class, and faction of inactive encounters.
Ambush: Gain a preemptive attack on an enemy entering the zone.
Mount/Dismount: Enter an unattended or disabled rig.
Special: Certain abilities and gear require spending your action to activate.

5. Hazard Phase: Environmental hazards, map conditions, and status effects all activate at this time.

Wreckers engage in combat by declaring one of the following actions:

Attack: Roll weapon attacks and resolve simultaneously.
Cover: Dice are scaled down when attacking you; immunity to Forced Movement, Disabling attack riders, and attack riders inflicting persistent damage.
Suppress: Spend attack to scale down enemy attack dice.
Retreat: Spend attack to move away one zone.
Improvise: Spend attack to roll 1d6 on Improv Table.

Improv Table

1 JunkTower: Attack 1d6/5 AoE.
2 Red Barrels: Attack 1d8/2 AoE.
3 Green Barrels: All units in hex receive 1 Poison Token.
4 Industrial Equipment: Attack 1d8/10.
5 Sinkhole: Attack 1d8/Disable AoE. Does not affect units with Fly.
6 Exposed Conduits: All rigs in hex Disabled.

Supply Kits

Packages posted:

Package 1 – The Survivor
CS Armor
Motile Biocover

Package 2 – The Armiger
Weapon Upgrade Kit

Package 3 – The Scrapper

Package 4 – The Sector Ranger
Jump-Assist Module

Package 5 – The Meta

Package 6 – The Cutting Edge
Unlicensed Autodoc

Package 7 – The New Flesh
Mutagenic Syrinx

Package 8 – The Cipher
1d6 Supply
1d10 Supply
1d20 Supply

Supply Table

1 Medikit (consumable): Spend action to restore up to 3 HP; Discard to restore 1 Max HP. Spend 10 Luxe or an Action to reload.
2 Fabri-Kit (consumable): Spend action to restore 1 HP to a Rig. Spend 10 Luxe or an Action to reload.
3 Optiscope: Scale up dice on attached weapon. Missing an attack adds +1 (cumulative) to attack. Hit resets.
4 Saf-T-Barrel: 1 of 3 Map-specific HazMat suites, presented by Green Barrels Inc.
5 AutoFalconoid (consumable): Familiar. Deploy as an Action to collect an item from another hex. Attack required for held item. Spend 10 Luxe or an Action to reload.
6 CS Armor (Yellow): Damage Reduction 2, Mod Slot 2.
7 DPM Pistol: 1d8 Attack, 2 Damage. Attack while Covering.
8 DPM Shotgun: 1d10 Attack, 2 Damage, Rampage.
9 DPM Rifle: 1d8 Attack, 2 Damage, Range 1.
10 Motile Bio-Cover: Familiar. A loyal friend to block attacks.
11 Port-a-Luxe Spend action to convert gear to Luxe equal to Supply Value (or 3d6 Luxe for nonsupply), and upload any number of held Luxe to Sponsors.
12 Wrecker Decoy (consumable): Action: Holographic projection attracts attacks next Encounter Phase. Spend 10 Luxe or an Action to reload.
13 Squidpack: Cannot be targeted while Retreating; may retreat in place. Spend 10 Luxe or Action to reload.
14 Assist Flare: Use as a free order to call in a figure from Wrecking Crews past to assist for the Phase, in a manner dependent on the Phase.
15 Rig-Ripper: 1d8 Attack, 3 Damage, Rampage.
16 Jump-Assist Module (consumable): +1 Move/Jump. Spend 10 Luxe or an Action to reload.
17 CS Module Pack: Spend action to roll d20 on CS Module table.
18 Weapon Upgrade Kit: Spend action to roll d20 on Weapon Upgrade table.
19 Unlicensed Autodoc (consumable): Spend action to roll d20 on Cyber table. Restores 1 Max HP.
20 Mutagenic Syrinx (consumable): Immediately roll d20 on Mutation table.

Cyber Table (Duplicate roll adds 1 max HP instead.)

1 Eyegear: All attack dice upscaled.
2 Spinal Antenna: +1 Scan Range
3 Heavy Arms: +1 Damage
4 Dermal Armor: +1 Max HP, Damage Reduction 1
5 Jacklegz© : +1 Move
6 Bone Lacing: Cannot be dropped from above 1HP to 0HP. Bypassed by damage of 6 or more.
7 Retractible Blade: 1d8/1 Attack; may Attack while Retreating.
8 Rigspike: When Ambushing Rig, may chose to remotely control it this round.
9 EM Hardening: Cannot be disabled
10 Shock Mesh: When hit, next Round's Move is increased by the number of damage taken.
11 Advanced Optics: Scale up Attack dice 2 steps.
12 Quadlegs: +1 Move, Immune to forced movement.
13 Assault Drill: 1d8/2 Penetrator Attack.
14 Reinforced Exoskeleton: +2 Max HP, Damage Reduction 1
15 Active Camouflage: Can only be hit in combat on a 5+
16 Adaptive Recycler: Salvage a rig to roll (1d10/1d20) on Cyber.
17 The Wooly Willie: Attract double Luxe when Scrounging.
18 The Full Robert: Subject gains 5 Max HP and Damage Reduction 2, but may be disabled as a rig.
19 The Big Goodbye: Upon reaching 0HP, deal 3 damage to all targets in zone.
20 The 'Sputin Special: When at 0 HP, instead of dying, all damage dealt to subject will instead inflict Max HP loss.

Mutation Table (Duplicate roll adds 1 max HP instead.)

1 Swollen Musculature: +1 damage.
2 Batrachian Legs: +1 Move.
3 Brachial Spurs: 1d8/1 attack; may attack while taking Cover.
4 Gelatinous Epidermis: Immune to toxic environments.
5 Flexible Snout: Gain an extra 1d6 luxe when Salvaging.
6 Ablative Limb: 1/Round, Reduce Move by 1 to cancel a successful attack.
7 Webspinners: 1d8 Attack, target cannot act this turn.
8 Acidic Spew: 1d6 Attack, 1 Damage every round until target spends action to recover.
9 Luminous Excretion: Spend action to restore 1 HP to target in same zone.
10 Chitinous Carapace: Gain Damage Reduction 2
11 Compound Eyes: Cannot be Ambushed.
12 Fibrous Ganglion: Upgrade die size on all mutation-based attacks.
13 Pulsating Skull: 1d6 Attack, target is controlled this round.
14 Unearthly Talons: 1d8/3 Attack.
15 Unstable Anatomy: Can only be hit in combat on a 5+
16 Patagia: +2 Move.
17 Lurking Horror: Deal double damage on first attack when Ambushing.
18 Warped Insight: Roll twice on Table rolls and choose one.
19 Patient Zero: When reduced to 0 HP, make 1d4 attack vs all non-rigs in zone; those hit must immediately roll d20 on Mutation Table.
20 Regeneration: When reduced to 0HP, reroll a new mutant character and resume play next round (no Supply or Cyber may be taken).

ADVANCED Mutation Table

1 Newflesh Eidolon: Subject's max HP is increased by number of mutations possessed.
2. Biological Levitation: Move directly to destination hex without entering the intervening hexes.
3 Giant Pincer: 1d10/3 attack; subject may prevent target from Moving away next Round.
4 Child of the Atom: Radiation damage restores subject's HP.
5 Bloodhound: Subject knows map coordinates of any Wrecker they've encountered.
6 Caddisfly Kid: Spend 10 Luxe to cancel 1 point of damage.
7 Psychoactive Pheremones: 1d8 AoE, targets attack themselves this Encounter.
8 Biolytic Eruption: 1d8/3 AoE attack, 1 Damage every round until target spends action to recover.
9 Therapeutic Radiation: Spend action to restore 1 HP to all allies in same zone.
10 Frangible Scutes: Attackers that hit the subject suffer 1 damage.
11 Sensory Cone: Subject may counter-Ambush a target that attempts to Ambush them.
12 Organic Core: All mutation-based attacks are upscaled a number of times equal to Mutations possessed.
13 Vox Mutandis: Mutants are neutral to the subject. ACT: Roll 4 on 1d4 to gain a mutant as a follower.
14 Abhorrent Rending: 1d10/5 Attack, Rampage.
15 Redundant Organs: Immune to multiplied damage and instant death effects.
16 Adrenal Accelerant: Spend an Action to gain double Move and upscaled attacks next round.
17 Creeping Doom: When Ambushing, roll 1d4 before rolling an attack; on a 4, target is instantly killed (A Boss sustains 10 extra damage.)
18 Warped Precognition: Reroll a single die once per round.
19 Progenitor: When reduced to 0 HP, make 1d8 attack vs all non-rigs in zone; those hit immediately gain all of the subject's mutations.
20 Terminal Fission: When reduced to 0HP, reroll 2 new mutant characters and resume play next round (no Supply or Cyber may be taken). A new player may adopt one of the offspring.

ADVANCED Cyber Table
1 Threaded Visualizer: Ignore Cover and Squidpacks.
2 IFF Authenticator: Subject gains the benefits of Ambush on any Scanned target entering their hex.
3 Gyroscopic Stabilizers: Subject ignores the first downscale applied to their attacks.
4 Hyperballistic Plates: Immune to multiplied damage and instant death effects.
5 Jumpjets: Move directly to destination hex without entering the intervening hexes.
6 Trauma Webbing: Attacks that would reduce subject to 0 HP are downscaled; subject takes half damage from AoE attacks.
7 Weapon Mount: Choose one weapon; attacks are upscaled, and it is free to Exfiltrate.
8 Upgrade Protocol: Rigs subverted by Rigspike have their attacks upscaled and deal 1 additional damage.
9 Capacitor Filaments: Anytime (unhardened) subject would be disabled, subject instead gains 1 HP; may exceed max.
10 Ion Screen: Radiation deals normal damage instead of lowering max HP; rad damage increases next Round's Move by 2.
11 Telescopic Array: Range weapons have their Range increased by 1.
12 Wreckerpede: When leaving enemy-inhabited hex, make 1d4/1 Trample attack against all targets in hex.
13 Thermal Lance: 1d8/3 Penetrator Plasma Attack, 1 Damage every round until target spends action to recover.
14 Hazard Baffling: Immune to Toxic Zones and persistent damage.
15 Mimetic Sheath: Enemy missing an attack on subject rolls a new attack against an ally.
16 Ablative Upgrades: Discard a Cyber to regain 1 HP.
17 Rail Loaders: 1d6/1 Penetrator Attack; upscale attack or increase damage by 1 for each 5 Luxe spent.
18 Bionic Recalibration: Subject gains 1 max HP for each Cyber possessed.
19 The Bigger Goodbye: Upon reaching 0 HP, deal 5 damage to all targets in zone, and a 1d8/5 attack to all targets in adjacent zones.
20 Digital Legion: Upon reaching 0HP, may inhabit a rig in the same Hex, retaining only class talent and veteran perks.

Aug Threshold posted:

Wreckers may have a maximum number of cybers or mutations based on their class.
Neo-Soldat: 3 Cyber/2 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Either
Junker: 5 Cyber/0 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Cyber
Rig-Jacker: 4 Cyber/1 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Cyber
Headhunter: 2 Cyber/3 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Either
Newtype: 0 Cyber/5 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Mutation
D-Breaker: 1 Cyber/4 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Mutation
Hiver: 1 Cyber/4 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Mutation

Advanced augs do not count as an additional aug.

While threshold is exceeded, the following apply:
>Aug-based attacks are downscaled for each aug in excess of threshold.
>Wrecker may not increase/restore Max HP or Move.
>Any new augs are automatically downgraded to Field versions.
When the number of augs is double threshold, the following apply:
>Wrecker counts as a rig/mutant with respect to negative effects.

Extraction with augs in excess of threshold costs an additional 30 Luxe per aug.
Removal of unpaid augs will occur randomly until subject's biology is in good standing.

Weapon Mod Table
1 Lightweight Materials Exfiltration costs reduced by 50%.
2 TactiCool Rail Allows room for an extra OptiScope.
3 Recoil Compensation Second attack during a phase is upscaled (AoE ineligible).
4 Target Assist Deals 1 damage on a missed attack.
5 Thermal Flechettes Deals 1 damage when Suppressing.
6 Depleted Pandemonium Rounds Inflicts 1 Periodic damage.
7 Purifier Protocol Attacks against Mutants are upscaled.
8 Junker Protocol Attacks against Rigs are upscaled.
9 CQC Stock Attack upscaled for every addtional enemy beyond 1 in the subject's hex.
10 Underbarrel Launcher AoE attack; 20 Luxe to reload.
11 Custom Choke Adds Rampage on a multiple of 4.
12 Concussion Chamber Adds Push on a multiple of 4.
13 Neutronium-Tipped Rounds Adds Penetrator on a multiple of 4.
14 Malware Emitter Disables on a multiple of 4.
15 ClusterDet Rounds Deal 1 AoE damage on a kill.
16 EM Coils +1 Damage per cyber/Rig Tier
17 Plasma Sheathing +1 Damage per mutation/Mutant Tier
18 Hair Trigger First Strike in combat.
19 Mag-Rail +1 Range
20 Ripper Bayonet 1/4 chance of an extra, downscaled, attack.

Combat Support Armor Modules
1 Medical Automatically use a loaded Medikit when damaged.
2 Towing Drag an ally without any loss of Move.
3 Ablation +1 DR; 10 Luxe to reload.
4 Changer Swap Modules as free Action.
5 Mobility Ignore hex features that would impede movement.
6 Efficiency Reloading items costs half as much.
7 Research Experimental data gathered is doubled.
8 Pilot Mounted rigs gain +1 Move and +1 HP.
9 Stability Resist forced movement; 10 Luxe to reload.
10 Slot Expander Doesn't take a slot. +1 Mod Slot
11 Stim Prevent Move loss; 10 Luxe to reload.
12 Trauma Prevent Max HP loss; 10 Luxe to reload.
13 Armor +1 DR.
14 Hazard +1 DR vs Toxic damage.
15 Pyro +1 DR vs Inferno damage.
16 Rad +1 DR vs Rad damage.
17 Gunner Weapons of Mounted rigs are upscaled and deal +1 damage.
18 Vault +3 Move; Bypass intervening hexes. 10 Luxe to reload.
19 Alacrity Gain First Strike; 10 Luxe to reload.
20 Slot Multiplexer Doesn't take a slot. +2 Mod Slots.

Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Nov 12, 2018 around 22:48

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011

Kal Risso / RIME / DROP / boop / Liberté, Égalité, Monstruosité / Sh'Bang / Snipers on the Moon / More Bang for Your Buck / Mumia / Strato-Cradle / TOMB by Prince of Space

Lucinda / Bobby-Jack's Story/ ThornHo / Dropper / RigHo / Heavy D / Scrapfisher / Technopath, by Weregoat

Loss of Humanity, by Hexenritter

Roast Beef Injection, by Crazycryodude

Dropper / Xenoapiarist, by sheep-dodger

That Bee Ain't Right, by DogKisser

Hazard Doggles / Moonicorn, by Swedish Thaumocracy

#iLoveLife selfies, courtesy of Necrotech PMVS

Academy of Titan's Horrorspiration Series

Rook's Zodiac Hagiography, by DogKisser

Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Nov 28, 2018 around 19:57

Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...

Name: Bobby-Jack Johnson
Portrait: 1
Class: Headhunter
A 6 on cybernetics - Bone Lacing
A 6 on supplies - Squidpack

Theantero fucked around with this message at Nov 28, 2017 around 11:20

The Lord of Hats
Aug 22, 2010

Name: Stev Ansahok
Class: Neo-Soldat
Supply Roll: 1d6 3
CYBER ROLL: 1d20 8

Stev Ansahok is a mysterious and heroic veteran of the Moon Wars.

Unfortunately, the Moon Wars were such a horrible embarrassment that everyone involved was sentenced to death so that we could just kind of forget about them.

The Lord of Hats fucked around with this message at Nov 27, 2017 around 22:07

Aug 15, 2015

Lets get our X tons of Duranium back!

....Is that still a valid thing to jingoistically blow out of proportion?

Name: Cryo

Class: Rigjacker
Supply table roll: 1d6 1
Cyber table: 1d8 2

I sure hope lower numbers means better gear...

Jun 17, 2007

Yam Slacker

Name: 'Midge' Gureyevitch
Portrait: 3
Class: Junker
A 1 on supply - Medkit (Spend action to heal 1hp)
A 2 on cyber - Spinal antenna (+1 scan range)

'Midge' is a hulking brute of a man, slavic ancestry. The nickname is probably ironic.

AJ_Impy fucked around with this message at Nov 28, 2017 around 12:04

Dog Kisser
Mar 30, 2005

But People have fears that beasts do not. Questions, too.

Name: Stranger
Portrait: 12
Class: Newtype
HP: 4
Move: 4
A 15 on Mutation - Unstable Anatomy
A 5 on Mutation - Flexible Snout
A 3 on Supply - Optiscope

Dog Kisser fucked around with this message at Nov 28, 2017 around 02:24

Prince of Space
Apr 17, 2016

Went Full Retard, killed 14 dudes. Pride of the 69th Awful Company. R.I.P.

Dinosaur Gum

Name: Kal Risso
Portrait: Wrecker 7
Class: Newtype
Hp: 5
Move: 3
Supply: 6 = Squidpack
Mutation 1: 19 = Patient Zero
Mutation 2: 3 = Brachial Spurs

Prince of Space fucked around with this message at Nov 28, 2017 around 04:13

Nov 11, 2010

Name: Operative Delta
Portrait: 9
Class: Headhunter
1d6 on Supply: Squidpack: 1d6 6
1d10 on Cyber: Retractible Blade: 1d10 7

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011

Hazel: It must be intimidating, to know you're about to be hurled into a life-or-death struggle, in an unforgiving toxic wasteland, against enemies ten times bigger than you are. Can you imagine?

Cawsey: Well, the Wreckers are all administered a healthy cocktail of potent sedatives and muscle relaxants before their drop. You know, Hazel, you want to be as loose as possible when you plow into the earth like the fist of a vengeful space god.

Hazel: And I suppose it's nice to go out happy if your braking thrusters and drag chutes fail and you dig your own grave at 12,000 kph. Not that that's happened since Series 4...

Cawsey: Though there was Series 6, when the explosive bolts on Jobro Deel's pod hatch failed to detonate, if I recall correctly.

Hazel: Poor bastard boiled like a soykaf. Speaking of, while our Wreckers are poured into their drop pods, let's go to Field Observer Eurydice Mann-Chong down planetside, to tell us about tonight's theatre of conflict. Scintillate us, Eury!"

Eurydice: Hazel, it's hard to believe that this dried up turd of a landscape was once a sparkling, healthy sea! You might think ol' Eury's is plunking your twanger.
But then explain all the boats, Hazel, explain all the boats!
I am many things to many enforcement agencies, but never a twanger-plucker, friends. Never a twanger-plucker.

Hazel: I think the heat may be getting to Eury; we'll come back to--

Eurydice: Let me finish, you bob-headed tank-job! SALT.

Eurydice: Here in this parched seabed, the skeletons of commerce lay bare for the taking. Wreckers will deploy along the Southern and Eastern reaches of the map, and that is also where the five Strato-Cradles can be found if things get a little too hot for them.

Shipwrecks abound, many still loaded with valuable resources, ripe for the harvesting.

Reports of scavenger camps in the north (08.00; 05.03) have been confirmed by our recon spotters, possibly a source of materiel support, or a shallow grave!

At (09.00), enterprising Wreckers will find the Luxe Crucible, where they can convert gear and upload luxe to the Sponsors in forlorn hope of aid!

Towering over the ruin at (07.05) is that precarious aerial we call the Scan Tower, ideal for getting an unobstructed view of your scenic environs, and the friendly people who inhabit it!

I hope you popped your rad-bans if you poke around near (10.05)! An old submarine is marooned here, a monument to the follies of ancient, poorly-organized, un-televised warfare! Who knows what treasures this stinking carcass holds? The whole area surrounding it is a radioactive shitshow, though, so look out!

But while you're exploring this quaint locality, keep your head-joints fully articulated, because SALT's roaming midboss rig would be happy to tear them off for you! That's right, an αlpha Titan, not content to sit and wait, is roaming these cracked flats looking for Wrecker rear end to stomp!

Finally, head up Northwest, and you'll find the ruins of the old coastal refineries. A good place for a fuel cache, or an Ambush! And at (00.00), in that crumbling prosperity graveyard, you'll find the Zodiac Beacon. Death is certain if you activate the Beacon and summon this map's boss, but remember that whichever Wrecker does so claims an additional 50 Luxe bounty!

Cawsey: Good poo poo. Compelling poo poo. Tell us about the Zodiac, loving Eurydice.

Eurydice: Hold on to your potatoes, because this is where the real Wrecking Crew starts. This bottomland's king rear end-hander is...

Eurydice: The return of an old favorite: The 3066-B Cancer! This hulking Dredge-Excavator was born to tear it up. 360 degree mobility, with a massive steel-shearing claw capable of tearing the hull off a fuel tanker and an earth-moving shovel more than capable of digging the grave of what's left of the Wreckers that got too close.
Add to that an ultra high pressure water cannon, and a full payload of demolition drones, and no one is safe from the ravages of Cancer!

Wreckers, death and glory await in SALT. But mostly death. Hazel?

Hazel: Thanks, Eury. Looks like quite the run ahead of us, wouldn't you say, Cawsey?

Cawsey: A real snallygaster, Hazel. Let's hope our Wreckers are feeling no pain right now, because there's going to be plenty to go around soon enough.

Slots are still available!

Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Jun 20, 2018 around 18:29

Apr 28, 2017

Name: Doobrie
Wrecker 4
Class: Rigjacker
Load out:
Mr Stinger
Supply table: 1d6 1 - Medkit
Cyber table: 1d8 8 - Rigspike

WereGoat fucked around with this message at Nov 29, 2017 around 12:20

Not Alex
Oct 9, 2012

Cut loose before the god eaters show up.

Name: Scramble
Portrait #11
Class: Newtype
HP: 1d6 6
Move: 1d4 1
Mutation roll 1: 1d20 10 -Chitinous Carapace
Mutation roll 2: 1d20 20 -Regeneration
Supply roll: 1d6 3 -Optiscope

I am an egg.

Not Alex fucked around with this message at Nov 30, 2017 around 02:46

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011

Not Alex posted:

I am an egg.

You Are An Egg.

Helical Nightmares
Apr 30, 2009


Welcome to Dr. Yith's discount Cyber-Driver! Yes that's right friends! You too can get the Jacklegz of your dreams and have them installed without missing a minute of WRECKING CREW. We come DIRECTLY to the door of your hovel or shack and do operations on the spot! Anesthesia via electricity is our specialty! Just climb up on our patented hood-ICU and we'll get started. The warmth of the engine is a perk you will only find in Dr. Yith's Cyber-Driver!

Not affiliated with Dr. Pnakotus or his lab regardless of the pending lawsuits.

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011

Hazel: The waiting is intense, Rev, and I'm not the one drugged up and strapped to a flying coffin. Any insights on what might be percolating in our esteemed Wreckers' heads right now?

Ocho: Hazel, it reminds me of the last time I myself danced on the edge of glory. Licensed D-Stream Viewers of the Human Diaspora, let Reverend Ocho regale you with a split-knuckled tale of the Hacktogon, and the doughty Fustigatorians who went unto Muscle Jesus in that holy cloud of blood and teeth.

Hazel: You know I'm always primed for a story of lithe, glistening athletes being pounded into so many coldcuts, Rev, but this no-doubt enthralling digression will have to wait. Our Producer is telling me that the last Wreckers have been secured in their enclosures.

Female VO: Pods locked. Wreckers Ready.
AUDIO: Stepwave Gravitone Instrumental (Hi-Tension)

Ocho: Hope you already procured your beverage of choice, because pods are hot to drop in 3.

Hazel: 2.

Both: 1!

AUDIO: Destruction of the Airhorn Homeworld
Female VO: Pods away. WRECKING CREW begins.

Sponsors Only Map!

1. Bobby-Jack Johnson
Your pod veers off-course!
You begin at (00.06).

2. Stev Ansahok
Your pod veers off-course!
You begin at (01.09).

3. Cryo
You begin at (00.11).

4. "Midge" Gureyevitch
Your pod veers off-course!
You begin at (02.10)

5. Stranger
You begin at (04.11)

6. Kal Risso
You begin at (06.11)

7. Operative Delta
You begin at (08.11)

8. Doobrie
You begin at (10.11)

9. Scramble
You begin at (13.11)

Wreckers, take your movements, and remember to spoiler tag!

Dog Kisser
Mar 30, 2005

But People have fears that beasts do not. Questions, too.


Stranger burst from his pod, generating temporary musculature to project him outwards. He needed a weapon. He needed to hide. To hide until he could kill from the darkness and escape with the riches of another. He picked a direction and ran.

Move - Head to Shipwreck at 04.08

Apr 28, 2017


The drop pod's expolosive bolts launch the door a short way away, smoke hanging in the air. From the pod swaggers Doobrie leaning in towards a camera drone.

"Roight, Doobrie here, thought you could chuck me oan an an exile freighter and forget about me, eh? Can't keep a good man down, doncherknow. Eh? O'il be roiding that Zee-Rig in nao toime."

Move 10.11>11.11>12.11

Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...


Bobby-Jack watched as his pod veered off-course. Good. Probably meant he could have some space, which meant more loot for him.

Well, that or an immediate, ghastly death behind enemy lines. But you took the good with the bad.

Moving to the Shipwreck at 03.05, via means of 01.05 and 02.05

The Lord of Hats
Aug 22, 2010


As the bolts blew from his pod, Stev clambered out cheerfully. Holy poo poo! The pod hadn't fallen apart on the way down, and they'd given him drugs beforehand to make the ride easier! This was way better than the Moon Wars! He hadn't even known that the technology existed for pods that made it all the way to the ground!

He gave the surroundings a quick survey, slotted his scope onto his pistol, in true Moon War fashion, and dashed off into the distance, followed by camera drones. No point sticking around, it wasn't like they'd drop him right on top of the loot. That wouldn't be any fun!

Running to 3.08. Curse my slow-rear end movement speed!

The Lord of Hats fucked around with this message at Dec 1, 2017 around 19:28

Aug 15, 2015

Lets get our X tons of Duranium back!

....Is that still a valid thing to jingoistically blow out of proportion?


Move 00.10 > 01.09

Crazycryodude fucked around with this message at Dec 1, 2017 around 20:08

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011

Only movement in this phase, please.

Aug 15, 2015

Lets get our X tons of Duranium back!

....Is that still a valid thing to jingoistically blow out of proportion?

Oh duh

Not Alex
Oct 9, 2012

Cut loose before the god eaters show up.


Scramble... well, scrambles from the pod. Carapace clacks on carapace as she checks for damage. Unharmed. Gestation continues. Time to get some distance from the crash zone.

Move 13.11 to 12.11

Not Alex fucked around with this message at Dec 1, 2017 around 22:55

Prince of Space
Apr 17, 2016

Went Full Retard, killed 14 dudes. Pride of the 69th Awful Company. R.I.P.

Dinosaur Gum

Name: Kal Risso, Newtype HP: 5/5 Move: 3
Loadout: Squidpack, Patient Zero, Brachial Spurs

With a steel-toed boot, Kal Risso kicked at the hatch of his drop pod until the servos dropped and hitched squarely into place. With a rattling thunk, a lurch, and a deafening hiss of hydraulics, the bolts blasted out and the hatch was released, jettisoning the door and the pod's contents unceremoniously onto the floor of the bitter desert wasteland known as Bottom. Kal uncoupled his ejection seat's restraining belts and righted himself in mid-sprawl. He dusted his leather bomber jacket off and surveyed the bleakness of his surroundings.

What an ugly place, Kal thought. Dry bones, derelict shipwrecks, and endless desolate salt flats as far as the eye could see. Kal swore a Teluvian curse and watched with bemused curiosity as one of the hovering camera drones nearby beeped and bobbed angrily in his direction, as if insulted. He swatted at the thing and it veered far away, gaining air and tracking him from way outside his spurs' attack range. This was just not going to be his day.

The drugs and neurostabilizers that had been pumped into Kal at the moment of his drop-pod's orbital release were already starting to wear off. He moved toward the nearest visible landmark he could spot in the distance. With his heightened endurance and superhuman constitution, his initial trek through the barren wastes should prove to be no problem.

06.11 -> 06.10 -> 06.09

Jun 17, 2007

Yam Slacker


The hulking Junker emerged from his pod with easy deliberation, flashing a wry smile to a nearby camdrone.

"Be very quiet, am hunting the big rigs, yes?"

Advance from 02.10 to 02.09

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011

Update is coming tonight, so get in your move if you haven't!

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011

Sweet parallax! Did you see that, Hazel?

That, dear Reverend, was almost curtains for Johnson and Ansahok.
The groan from our Sponsor's Lounge was audible when those two out-of-control pods plowed smoking ballistic trails a hair's-breadth from one another! Don't pound that Dislike just yet, gentle viewers; with all the pod-scatter, it looks like Stev and Midge are right on top of each other. Could we be seeing a first-round elimination in the making?

Wouldn't be the first, Hazel, and it won't be the last.

So no instant flaming disqualifications this time, but they call this first segment The Funnel for a reason. Our Wreckers are packed in tight, and who knows how their drugged-out, drop-battered minds will react to first contact?

Moves to 03.05!

Shabash! That shipwreck is heavy with sweet, sweet salvage!

Heavy with salvage, and strewn with unexploded warheads from the Water Wars III-IV! And...what's that? It looks like Bobby-Jack's digging has disturbed a squad of Gamma Enforcers!

Somebody's gonna blow up tonight, Hazel. I can feel it in my bones and organs.

Progress halted at 02.09 by a Wrecker encounter!
"Midge" Gureyevitch encountered!

Contact, Hazel! We've got real-rear end, Wrecker-to-Wrecker contact!
I've never seen a man under a K-Hammer. I've always been...curious.

Moves to 01.09
Encounters empty drop pod!

Cryo here just found...I do believe that's Stev's pod.

I wish her much joy of it.

Moves to 02.09
Stev Ansahok encountered!

They might team up, Hazel. This doesn't necessarily have to end with a man's head transformed into a high-protein snack spread by a kinetic accelerator on a stick.

Technically, sure.

Moves to 06.09!

Another camera, another shipwreck full of loot and bombs.

No hostiles, though...what's our mu...uh, newtype here gonna make of this...Is that some kind of wizard, Hazel?

The world has moved on, dear Ocho.

Moves to 06.09

Risso finds an unfortunate fellow traveleler in this doomed spiral of desire and regret, and it looks like he's pinned down by...Aw, here we go! Here we go!

A Beta Enforcer! I'd wondered if we were going to see any Betas on the first map.


Delta's pod hasn't opened...dare we hope for a malfunction?

He could've just blacked out from the G-Forces. Or it's a cunning Ambush. Or he's dead already.

Better hope he makes a move before the lung bandits catch up with him!

Progress halted at 11.11 by an encounter!

The mutant enemy is fielding cosplayers now?

Moves to 13.11

Looks like Scramble might be poached. I doubt all the king's horses and all the king's men...something something land mines.

Assuming he doesn't blow up, he's still got to contend with those muties tracking him down across the flats and cracking open his skull for that spicy, spicy head-meat! Broof'n!

She, Rev. The freakish mutant egg creature identifies as female.

My apologies, my judgement is impaired when I'm just so hungry for Auntie K's Original Spicy Head-Meat©! Now with meat!

Wreckers, if you're in an Encounter, please post your Combat actions, or, if you're with a non-hostile NPC or PC you don't want to kill, your non-combat interactions!

Sponsor-Only Map!

Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Dec 2, 2017 around 21:08

Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...


The moment was tense. A bead of sweat meandered its way from under Bobby-Jack's helmet as his hand caressed the handle of his gun, the man furiously trying to decide which of the four enforcers to shoot first.


Their visors did glint pretty menacingly in the sun, didn't they?


Being filled by lead from four directions at once, this was the most likely outcome, yes?


After a moment of deliberation, Bobby-Jack, thus far having stood still like a statue, made a lightning fast movement and pulled the trigger. On his Squidpack, that is, releasing a huge, inky-black cloud. A moment later, a sprinting man could be seen emerging from it, the cam-droids capturing what seemed to be the clear trails of desperate tears of terror making their way from under his goggles.

Some things just weren't worth dying for.

BOBBY-JACK RETREATS! (the Squidpack keeps him safe from retaliation attacks by the Enforcers)

Retreating to hex 02.05

Apr 26, 2007

"Little by little the old world crumbled, and not once did the king imagine that some of the pieces might fall on him"

I would like to say that Vesuvius Space BBQ supplies has managed to have some marketing budget freed recently, so we are looking to spread our BRAND to the fine people watching the Wrecking Crew. We're going to look to try to inform the amazing contestants about the win-win situation that might happen should they find an opportunity for some product placement.

Not Alex
Oct 9, 2012

Cut loose before the god eaters show up.


Scramble pauses, head cocking at a glinting shape nearby. She gets that sinking feeling only felt by people who have trudged deep into a minefield before noticing. A rare but potent emotion. Shuck it, this isn't good.

A deep, distorted chuckling sounds from a twisted drift of sheet metal and caked grit to her right. Several abhumans are slinking from cover. Two have the twisted and boil covered physique of the helix-doomed. They're chaff. The larger shape is healthier or least not immediately degenerating. The basso chuckle rumbles from its drooping proboscis. It points at her and then makes a hideous slurping noise.

Well that concludes the diplomatic portion of this encounter. Running away in a minefield seems an exercise in rapid self-deletion. And the snouted one could no doubt sniff out her trail even if she made it clear.

Two problems. Maybe one solution. Scramble shuffles warily into position, edging close to the mine that had caught her eye. With a prayer and swift kick, she flicks the mine at the abhumans.

Improvise: 1d6 3 -Toxic Zone!

Or at least that was the plan. The mine sails past the mutants into their festering lair. There's a crumping explosion and hideous green smoke comes boiling out. What the shell were they stockpiling in there?

(So I have no idea if I'm doing combat right here. I'm assuming without a weapon I can't attack, but wasn't sure if there are restrictions on improvising. Also not sure what a toxic zone does but sounds fun)

Not Alex fucked around with this message at Dec 2, 2017 around 21:32

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011

Not Alex posted:

(So I have no idea if I'm doing combat right here. I'm assuming without a weapon I can't attack, but wasn't sure if there are restrictions on improvising. Also not sure what a toxic zone does but sounds fun)

No worries, you're golden.
Toxic zones deal 1 damage during hazard phase.

Apr 28, 2017


"Yyyeah! Lurvely shades mate, eh? Toime Trahvew, oi lurve dem movies."

Looks straight at done.

"Am oi a stah? Yeeeeahh, toike dis. Bring back spewky fewcher poo poo, Hoi foive."

Gives time traveler Mr Stinger, high fives him

WereGoat fucked around with this message at Dec 2, 2017 around 22:01

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011

Because it may be shortly relevant, to avoid potential headaches, PVP Attack rolls will be rolled by me.

Prince of Space
Apr 17, 2016

Went Full Retard, killed 14 dudes. Pride of the 69th Awful Company. R.I.P.

Dinosaur Gum

Name: Kal Risso, Newtype HP: 5/5 Move: 3
Loadout: Squidpack, Patient Zero, Brachial Spurs

Kal Risso circled warily around the perimeter of the ancient metal gunships' wreckage, seeking out some piece of valuable scrap or an obvious crate of ordnance worthwhile enough that he could salvage it for some precious luxe. What he found instead was something far less inert and far more dangerous than he had ever considered encountering this early into the game: a Beta Enforcer, sitting in the center of the ruins on high alert, deeply engaged in its patrol//attack protocol. The β Rig seemed strangely fixated on scanning one particular region of the zone for threats, keeping its gun raised. What could it possibly be seeking out? Was it protecting something? Kal stealthily circled around the Beta Enforcer's position to get a better view. There was no way he could take out a Beta Enforcer on his own, not with his current arms. If this solitary Enforcer Rig turned his way, he'd have to pull the cord on his Squidpack and run.

As he got closer to the β Enforcer's apparent region of interest, Kal heard a faint, choked voice, straining itself to be heard against the whipping desert winds.

"Oh, is that someone there? Thank God - I thought I was going to die out here alone!"

Kal moved closer to the rasping voice, being overly cautious to avoid the Enforcer's scanners. He didn't have the heart to say it, but there was no God to be thankful for - certainly not here.

"Can you move?" Kal called out. "That Enforcer is looking for threats in your exact position."

The reedy voice lashed out, desperate, "I know - p-please! Help me. I'm a ... a soldier-for-hire. I know the secret location of a treasure, I just need some first aid or a Medikit to get me on my feet."

Kal didn't have a Medikit and his first aid knowledge was rudimentary at best. If he stayed here too long, that Enforcer Rig was going to come swinging around and it would attack them both with impunity. There's no way they'd both make it out of here alive. Not today.

"I can't help you, friend. All I can do is create a diversion for us both, if you can still move, now's the time to get up and RUN!"

Kal Risso pulled the zip cord on his Squidpack and ran between cover and into the distance through a thick cloud of inky nanotechnicolor blackness.

Kal Risso Retreats with his Squidpack

06.09 -> 07.08

The Lord of Hats
Aug 22, 2010


Was that... it was! Another wrecker! What luck, to have already found a friend out in these blighted wastes!

"Hey! You! Hello there! Lovely day for some scrounging, isn't it! Hell of a ride down, I think we must have nearly--oh bollocks" Stev shouted, jauntily waving with his pistol, until the drat hunk of junk misfired, sending a bullet ricocheting off to who knows where in the mountains of junk. "Sorry about that! It's not the greatest gun, but it's got sentimental value to me."

There was an odd metallic pinging and twanging somewhere nearby, What was that? It was almost like... like... oh god, it was on the tip of his tongue. Oh! Like the time they'd accidentally collapsed that bridge along their own escape route! The cables snapping had sounded just like that! That's funny, why would he be hearing that now? Must be a drug-induced flashback. Ah well.

"Anyways, it looks like we've got a long day ahead of us. I was thinking maybe we could check out that wreck over there together, see what that's all about. Work out a fair deal. Sound good to you?"

Hey, the pinging stopped! But now there was that horrible groaning noise. Stev frowned. Had the other guy heard him over that?


A nearby tower of cars finally crossed the tipping point, raining down on the area. Whoops.

Improvise!: 1d6 1

Jun 17, 2007

Yam Slacker


The burly junker watched the other wrecker dispassionately, heeding his actions and words alike. Once he'd said his piece, Midge shrugged, and replied,

"Sure, even split, works for me."

Resolve by not being an enemy in the zone and agreeing to work together as suggested.

Dog Kisser
Mar 30, 2005

But People have fears that beasts do not. Questions, too.


Stranger dropped to all fours, his joints clicking noisily into new positions, one after the other. His snout extended and swiveled as he considered the area he found himself in - plenty of scrap (and unexploded ordnance) and also... he rolled away from the Wwizard, hissing. He didn't trust the fellow, and he made it known with a territorial display, but he didn't make a violent case of it. Who knew what the man could unleash - firewalls? Daemons? There was terror in the unknown, and until he had means of defending himself he wouldn't make contact.

Doing absolutely nothing because I want to loot!

Nov 11, 2010


Operative delta stalks out of his pod, no clue on his face showing the delay. He quickly moves forward towards his target.

Move to 06.09, Salvage if possible.

Nothingtoseehere fucked around with this message at Dec 3, 2017 around 18:19


Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011

We can't take late moves for logistical reasons, but you'll be able to do the second thing you posted (but in your current hex) during Action Phase.

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