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Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011



MAP 1|1: SALT -- https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...3#post478823928
MAP 1|2: RIME -- https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...0#post480487788
MAP 1|3: DROP -- https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...1#post482979747
MAP 2|1: DARK -- https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...1#post485801097
MAP 2|2: TOMB --https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...1#post489092681

Female VO: Drone and Clone, Freak and Chic; when it's 11PM Solarian Standard and the weekly ethanol ration just deployed, you know it's time for...





Hazel: Good evening Diaspora! I'm Hazel Dang-Cobra Jr., and with me always is the Reverend Cawsey "Ocho" Rios, three time Micro-Grav Champion of the Hacktogon.

Cawsey: Good to be here, Hazel.

Hazel: Welcome once more to the stately Pleasure Dome! Where sins are absolved, and winners live forever!*. We've scraped the lowest depths of the slumstacks, prison colonies and long-haul exile freighters, and brought the hungriest, most desperate contestants to you, our precious baby viewer!

Cawsey: This series' contestants are hungry for that luxe, Hazel. They're failures, prisoners, and mutants all, wretched to the last, and some might say entirely beyond redemption, but they've poured everything they have into getting this one last chance at redemption, or at least a stay of execution.

Hazel: Well, this year's deadly rigs and lethal combat zones are going to make them work for it, that's for sure. The industry's best murderologists have slaved over their killing assets to make sure this is the best Wrecking Crew yet!

Cawsey: Strong words, Hazel. Strong, shapely words. I can't wait to see what toxic hellscape they dig up first. Hazel, are you ready for a scrap?

Hazel: You took the words right out of my script, Rev; I was decanted ready. Dust off the shattered wreckage of your life, precious babies, It's time for Wrecking Crew!



AUDIO: Neobaroque Crunkwave Instrumental
Female VO: Our mother Earth is a wasted heap, but that doesn't mean your life has to be! A bold new crop of contestants has arrived from all around the Diaspora looking for a chance to help reclaim our beleagered planet...and stack luxe to precarious heights. Contestants will dropped into a dangerous combat zone, riddled with hazards, enemies both mutated and mechanical, and precious, precious resources.
The goal? To reclaim salvage to bank precious Luxe, and to amass enough gear and power to take down the Zone Boss, a pants-making GBS threads Zodiac-Class Rig!
Go it on foot, or hop in a rig and ride to mechanized victory!
Impress the sponsors in hopes of a supply drop, or ride the night train as a dark horse!
Work together for a better tomorrow, or waste one another on sight, the choice is yours!



Female VO: Our Wreckers are sorted into five "classes" by a standardized set of metrics, and assigned starting loadout based on their class.






Unlocked:






Female VO: Luminaries from around the Diaspora have gathered on Decree Station Alph to rub elbows and support their chosen Wreckers on the field of battle. Politicians, gangsters, titans of industry, and the fusest of celebs, all with their fingers on those drop-pod deployment consoles. Want to send medical aid to your embattled buddy? How about a fuel drop for a flagging fave? Or just order an airstrike and watch everyone eat poo poo; this is Wrecking Crew!





Wreckers: Make a post listing your name, portrait, class, and Orokos rolls for loadout. When you see your name and vitals on the broadcast, you're in!
Since the game is round-based, if you play a wrecker, you'll want to keep up.
The game updates every day except Wednesday and Sunday!

Sponsors: Just participate in the thread. If you don't have a Wrecker on the board, you can post as a sponsor! Wreckers will upload luxe from the combat zone that you can use to send materiel support...or "support"! RP in the thread, create experimental new items, and present bonus challenges for the players!
Unlike wreckers, sponsors have no expectation of involvement; jump in and out as you like!

Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Oct 22, 2018 around 19:24

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Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011







Hazel: Cawsey, let's talk rules.

Cawsey: You know how I feel about rules, Hazel.

Hazel: That's between you, the judge, and your ex-husband, Reverend. Roll the vid.



AUDIO: Southern Vapor-Grind Instrumental
Female VO: The rules of Wrecking Crew are simple.

The Target Number is 4. Abilities and items may change this, but 4 is the default target number for any action, regardless of die size.



1. Sponsor Phase: Sponsor posters (anyone in-thead without a Wrecker on the board) will receive a 5 Luxe stipend every round (not phase) they post. They may pose challenges for Wreckers to complete, which will also grant sponsors bonus Luxe when completed. Luxe for purchases of Sponsor items will be deducted first from the sponsor's account, then from the client Wrecker's.

Sponsors may use their own or a Wrecker's uploaded luxe to purchase one of the items listed below at any time, which will be delivered during sponsor phase (with the exception of the Airstrike, which will occur during Hazard phase):

Supply Drop: Drops a crate granting a 1d20 roll on Supply in target zone. 25 Luxe.
Drone Delivery: Sends a specific Supply item to a specific Wrecker. 25+Supply Rating Luxe.
Experimental Items: Sends a hazardous beta version of an item with additional capabilities. Half Supply rating+25.
Exfiltrate Wrecker: Safely evacuates a Wrecker (but no items) currently occupying a Strato-Cradle. 25 Luxe.
First Exfiltrated Item: +10 Luxe.
Second Exfiltrated Item: +20 Luxe.
Additional Exfiltrated Items: +30 Luxe each.
Exfiltrate γ Rig: Evacuates a non-enemy γ rig currently occupying a Strato-Cradle. Does not include a Mounted wrecker. 25 Luxe.
Exfiltrate β Rig: Evacuates a non-enemy β rig currently occupying a Strato-Cradle. Does not include a Mounted wrecker. 50 Luxe.
Airstrike: Target a zone for aerial bombardment. Targeting may not be perfect. 50 Luxe.
Rig Drop (γ): Deploy a previously exfiltrated rig in target zone. 15 Luxe.
Rig Drop (β): Deploy a previously exfiltrated rig in target zone. 35 Luxe.

quote:

Introducing Exclusive Sponsorships!
Now, a Wrecker and a Sponsor may, by mutual agreement, enter into an Exclusive Sponsorship!
1. The Wrecker in question may not have their Luxe spent by anyone other than their Sponsor!
2. The Wrecker's Device is granted functionality to upload Luxe anywhere with an Action!
3. A Sponsor's stipend is increased to 10 on rounds when their Wrecker earns awards or bounties!

Exclusives may be ended at any time by mutual consent; a Sponsor may unilaterally end an Exclusive at any time, but a Wrecker must Litigate to do so.

2. Movement Phase: Wreckers may move up to their listed Move stat, unless halted by a revealed Encounter or Ambush.
Please CONCEAL your movements in your posts.
Aim – If no Movement is taken, subject gains one upscale on the next Encounter Phase.

3. Encounter Phase: Wreckers resolve any revealed encounters and engage in combat.
Boost – If no Encounter occurs, in the next Action Phase subject gains either +1 to any HP restoration, +1 Luxe per die on Salvage, the ability to make both a Wide and Tight Scan, or +1 to a miscellaneous ACT roll.

4. Action Phase: Wreckers capable of acting may take one of the following actions:

Salvage: Gain 1d6 Luxe. Salvage a defeated rig for 3d6 Luxe for a Gamma, or 6d6 for a Beta! Cannot be used in a contested zone.
Wide Scan: Reveal Wreckers, active Encounters, and certain hazards in adjacent spaces.
Tight Scan: Focus all sensors on one hex to reveal the number, class, and faction of inactive encounters.
Ambush: Gain a preemptive attack on an enemy entering the zone.
Mount/Dismount: Enter an unattended or disabled rig.
Special: Certain abilities and gear require spending your action to activate.

5. Hazard Phase: Environmental hazards, map conditions, and status effects all activate at this time.



Wreckers engage in combat by declaring one of the following actions:

Attack: Roll weapon attacks and resolve simultaneously.
Cover: Dice are scaled down when attacking you; immunity to Forced Movement, Disabling attack riders, and attack riders inflicting persistent damage.
Suppress: Spend attack to scale down enemy attack dice.
Retreat: Spend attack to move away one zone.
Improvise: Spend attack to roll 1d6 on Improv Table.

Improv Table

1 JunkTower: Attack 1d6/5 AoE.
2 Red Barrels: Attack 1d8/2 AoE.
3 Green Barrels: All units in hex receive 1 Poison Token.
4 Industrial Equipment: Attack 1d8/10.
5 Sinkhole: Attack 1d8/Disable AoE. Does not affect units with Fly.
6 Exposed Conduits: All rigs in hex Disabled.



Supply Kits

Packages posted:

Package 1 – The Survivor
CS Armor
Medikit
Motile Biocover

Package 2 – The Armiger
Optiscope
Weapon Upgrade Kit

Package 3 – The Scrapper
Fabrikit
Autofalconoid
Port-a-Luxe

Package 4 – The Sector Ranger
Jump-Assist Module
Saf-T-Barrel

Package 5 – The Meta
Squidpack

Package 6 – The Cutting Edge
Unlicensed Autodoc

Package 7 – The New Flesh
Mutagenic Syrinx

Package 8 – The Cipher
1d6 Supply
1d10 Supply
1d20 Supply

Supply Table

1 Medikit (consumable): Spend action to restore up to 3 HP; Discard to restore 1 Max HP. Spend 10 Luxe or an Action to reload.
2 Fabri-Kit (consumable): Spend action to restore 1 HP to a Rig. Spend 10 Luxe or an Action to reload.
3 Optiscope: Scale up dice on attached weapon. Missing an attack adds +1 (cumulative) to attack. Hit resets.
4 Saf-T-Barrel: 1 of 3 Map-specific HazMat suites, presented by Green Barrels Inc.
5 AutoFalconoid (consumable): Familiar. Deploy as an Action to collect an item from another hex. Attack required for held item. Spend 10 Luxe or an Action to reload.
6 CS Armor (Yellow): Damage Reduction 2, Mod Slot 2.
7 DPM Pistol: 1d8 Attack, 2 Damage. Attack while Covering.
8 DPM Shotgun: 1d10 Attack, 2 Damage, Rampage.
9 DPM Rifle: 1d8 Attack, 2 Damage, Range 1.
10 Motile Bio-Cover: Familiar. A loyal friend to block attacks.
11 Port-a-Luxe Spend action to convert gear to Luxe equal to Supply Value (or 3d6 Luxe for nonsupply), and upload any number of held Luxe to Sponsors.
12 Wrecker Decoy (consumable): Action: Holographic projection attracts attacks next Encounter Phase. Spend 10 Luxe or an Action to reload.
13 Squidpack: Cannot be targeted while Retreating; may retreat in place. Spend 10 Luxe or Action to reload.
14 Assist Flare: Use as a free order to call in a figure from Wrecking Crews past to assist for the Phase, in a manner dependent on the Phase.
15 Rig-Ripper: 1d8 Attack, 3 Damage, Rampage.
16 Jump-Assist Module (consumable): +1 Move/Jump. Spend 10 Luxe or an Action to reload.
17 CS Module Pack: Spend action to roll d20 on CS Module table.
18 Weapon Upgrade Kit: Spend action to roll d20 on Weapon Upgrade table.
19 Unlicensed Autodoc (consumable): Spend action to roll d20 on Cyber table. Restores 1 Max HP.
20 Mutagenic Syrinx (consumable): Immediately roll d20 on Mutation table.

Cyber Table (Duplicate roll adds 1 max HP instead.)

1 Eyegear: All attack dice upscaled.
2 Spinal Antenna: +1 Scan Range
3 Heavy Arms: +1 Damage
4 Dermal Armor: +1 Max HP, Damage Reduction 1
5 Jacklegz© : +1 Move
6 Bone Lacing: Cannot be dropped from above 1HP to 0HP. Bypassed by damage of 6 or more.
7 Retractible Blade: 1d8/1 Attack; may Attack while Retreating.
8 Rigspike: When Ambushing Rig, may chose to remotely control it this round.
9 EM Hardening: Cannot be disabled
10 Shock Mesh: When hit, next Round's Move is increased by the number of damage taken.
11 Advanced Optics: Scale up Attack dice 2 steps.
12 Quadlegs: +1 Move, Immune to forced movement.
13 Assault Drill: 1d8/2 Penetrator Attack.
14 Reinforced Exoskeleton: +2 Max HP, Damage Reduction 1
15 Active Camouflage: Can only be hit in combat on a 5+
16 Adaptive Recycler: Salvage a rig to roll (1d10/1d20) on Cyber.
17 The Wooly Willie: Attract double Luxe when Scrounging.
18 The Full Robert: Subject gains 5 Max HP and Damage Reduction 2, but may be disabled as a rig.
19 The Big Goodbye: Upon reaching 0HP, deal 3 damage to all targets in zone.
20 The 'Sputin Special: When at 0 HP, instead of dying, all damage dealt to subject will instead inflict Max HP loss.

Mutation Table (Duplicate roll adds 1 max HP instead.)

1 Swollen Musculature: +1 damage.
2 Batrachian Legs: +1 Move.
3 Brachial Spurs: 1d8/1 attack; may attack while taking Cover.
4 Gelatinous Epidermis: Immune to toxic environments.
5 Flexible Snout: Gain an extra 1d6 luxe when Salvaging.
6 Ablative Limb: 1/Round, Reduce Move by 1 to cancel a successful attack.
7 Webspinners: 1d8 Attack, target cannot act this turn.
8 Acidic Spew: 1d6 Attack, 1 Damage every round until target spends action to recover.
9 Luminous Excretion: Spend action to restore 1 HP to target in same zone.
10 Chitinous Carapace: Gain Damage Reduction 2
11 Compound Eyes: Cannot be Ambushed.
12 Fibrous Ganglion: Upgrade die size on all mutation-based attacks.
13 Pulsating Skull: 1d6 Attack, target is controlled this round.
14 Unearthly Talons: 1d8/3 Attack.
15 Unstable Anatomy: Can only be hit in combat on a 5+
16 Patagia: +2 Move.
17 Lurking Horror: Deal double damage on first attack when Ambushing.
18 Warped Insight: Roll twice on Table rolls and choose one.
19 Patient Zero: When reduced to 0 HP, make 1d4 attack vs all non-rigs in zone; those hit must immediately roll d20 on Mutation Table.
20 Regeneration: When reduced to 0HP, reroll a new mutant character and resume play next round (no Supply or Cyber may be taken).

ADVANCED Mutation Table

1 Newflesh Eidolon: Subject's max HP is increased by number of mutations possessed.
2. Biological Levitation: Move directly to destination hex without entering the intervening hexes.
3 Giant Pincer: 1d10/3 attack; subject may prevent target from Moving away next Round.
4 Child of the Atom: Radiation damage restores subject's HP.
5 Bloodhound: Subject knows map coordinates of any Wrecker they've encountered.
6 Caddisfly Kid: Spend 10 Luxe to cancel 1 point of damage.
7 Psychoactive Pheremones: 1d8 AoE, targets attack themselves this Encounter.
8 Biolytic Eruption: 1d8/3 AoE attack, 1 Damage every round until target spends action to recover.
9 Therapeutic Radiation: Spend action to restore 1 HP to all allies in same zone.
10 Frangible Scutes: Attackers that hit the subject suffer 1 damage.
11 Sensory Cone: Subject may counter-Ambush a target that attempts to Ambush them.
12 Organic Core: All mutation-based attacks are upscaled a number of times equal to Mutations possessed.
13 Vox Mutandis: Mutants are neutral to the subject. ACT: Roll 4 on 1d4 to gain a mutant as a follower.
14 Abhorrent Rending: 1d10/5 Attack, Rampage.
15 Redundant Organs: Immune to multiplied damage and instant death effects.
16 Adrenal Accelerant: Spend an Action to gain double Move and upscaled attacks next round.
17 Creeping Doom: When Ambushing, roll 1d4 before rolling an attack; on a 4, target is instantly killed (A Boss sustains 10 extra damage.)
18 Warped Precognition: Reroll a single die once per round.
19 Progenitor: When reduced to 0 HP, make 1d8 attack vs all non-rigs in zone; those hit immediately gain all of the subject's mutations.
20 Terminal Fission: When reduced to 0HP, reroll 2 new mutant characters and resume play next round (no Supply or Cyber may be taken). A new player may adopt one of the offspring.

ADVANCED Cyber Table
1 Threaded Visualizer: Ignore Cover and Squidpacks.
2 IFF Authenticator: Subject gains the benefits of Ambush on any Scanned target entering their hex.
3 Gyroscopic Stabilizers: Subject ignores the first downscale applied to their attacks.
4 Hyperballistic Plates: Immune to multiplied damage and instant death effects.
5 Jumpjets: Move directly to destination hex without entering the intervening hexes.
6 Trauma Webbing: Attacks that would reduce subject to 0 HP are downscaled; subject takes half damage from AoE attacks.
7 Weapon Mount: Choose one weapon; attacks are upscaled, and it is free to Exfiltrate.
8 Upgrade Protocol: Rigs subverted by Rigspike have their attacks upscaled and deal 1 additional damage.
9 Capacitor Filaments: Anytime (unhardened) subject would be disabled, subject instead gains 1 HP; may exceed max.
10 Ion Screen: Radiation deals normal damage instead of lowering max HP; rad damage increases next Round's Move by 2.
11 Telescopic Array: Range weapons have their Range increased by 1.
12 Wreckerpede: When leaving enemy-inhabited hex, make 1d4/1 Trample attack against all targets in hex.
13 Thermal Lance: 1d8/3 Penetrator Plasma Attack, 1 Damage every round until target spends action to recover.
14 Hazard Baffling: Immune to Toxic Zones and persistent damage.
15 Mimetic Sheath: Enemy missing an attack on subject rolls a new attack against an ally.
16 Ablative Upgrades: Discard a Cyber to regain 1 HP.
17 Rail Loaders: 1d6/1 Penetrator Attack; upscale attack or increase damage by 1 for each 5 Luxe spent.
18 Bionic Recalibration: Subject gains 1 max HP for each Cyber possessed.
19 The Bigger Goodbye: Upon reaching 0 HP, deal 5 damage to all targets in zone, and a 1d8/5 attack to all targets in adjacent zones.
20 Digital Legion: Upon reaching 0HP, may inhabit a rig in the same Hex, retaining only class talent and veteran perks.

Aug Threshold posted:

Wreckers may have a maximum number of cybers or mutations based on their class.
Neo-Soldat: 3 Cyber/2 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Either
Junker: 5 Cyber/0 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Cyber
Rig-Jacker: 4 Cyber/1 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Cyber
Headhunter: 2 Cyber/3 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Either
Newtype: 0 Cyber/5 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Mutation
D-Breaker: 1 Cyber/4 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Mutation
Hiver: 1 Cyber/4 Mutation
>Cross-Training Bonus: +1 Mutation

Advanced augs do not count as an additional aug.

While threshold is exceeded, the following apply:
>Aug-based attacks are downscaled for each aug in excess of threshold.
>Wrecker may not increase/restore Max HP or Move.
>Any new augs are automatically downgraded to Field versions.
When the number of augs is double threshold, the following apply:
>Wrecker counts as a rig/mutant with respect to negative effects.

Extraction with augs in excess of threshold costs an additional 30 Luxe per aug.
Removal of unpaid augs will occur randomly until subject's biology is in good standing.

Weapon Mod Table
1 Lightweight Materials Exfiltration costs reduced by 50%.
2 TactiCool Rail Allows room for an extra OptiScope.
3 Recoil Compensation Second attack during a phase is upscaled (AoE ineligible).
4 Target Assist Deals 1 damage on a missed attack.
5 Thermal Flechettes Deals 1 damage when Suppressing.
6 Depleted Pandemonium Rounds Inflicts 1 Periodic damage.
7 Purifier Protocol Attacks against Mutants are upscaled.
8 Junker Protocol Attacks against Rigs are upscaled.
9 CQC Stock Attack upscaled for every addtional enemy beyond 1 in the subject's hex.
10 Underbarrel Launcher AoE attack; 20 Luxe to reload.
11 Custom Choke Adds Rampage on a multiple of 4.
12 Concussion Chamber Adds Push on a multiple of 4.
13 Neutronium-Tipped Rounds Adds Penetrator on a multiple of 4.
14 Malware Emitter Disables on a multiple of 4.
15 ClusterDet Rounds Deal 1 AoE damage on a kill.
16 EM Coils +1 Damage per cyber/Rig Tier
17 Plasma Sheathing +1 Damage per mutation/Mutant Tier
18 Hair Trigger First Strike in combat.
19 Mag-Rail +1 Range
20 Ripper Bayonet 1/4 chance of an extra, downscaled, attack.

Combat Support Armor Modules
1 Medical Automatically use a loaded Medikit when damaged.
2 Towing Drag an ally without any loss of Move.
3 Ablation +1 DR; 10 Luxe to reload.
4 Changer Swap Modules as free Action.
5 Mobility Ignore hex features that would impede movement.
6 Efficiency Reloading items costs half as much.
7 Research Experimental data gathered is doubled.
8 Pilot Mounted rigs gain +1 Move and +1 HP.
9 Stability Resist forced movement; 10 Luxe to reload.
10 Slot Expander Doesn't take a slot. +1 Mod Slot
11 Stim Prevent Move loss; 10 Luxe to reload.
12 Trauma Prevent Max HP loss; 10 Luxe to reload.
13 Armor +1 DR.
14 Hazard +1 DR vs Toxic damage.
15 Pyro +1 DR vs Inferno damage.
16 Rad +1 DR vs Rad damage.
17 Gunner Weapons of Mounted rigs are upscaled and deal +1 damage.
18 Vault +3 Move; Bypass intervening hexes. 10 Luxe to reload.
19 Alacrity Gain First Strike; 10 Luxe to reload.
20 Slot Multiplexer Doesn't take a slot. +2 Mod Slots.

Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Nov 12, 2018 around 22:48

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011































Kal Risso / RIME / DROP / boop / Liberté, Égalité, Monstruosité / Sh'Bang / Snipers on the Moon / More Bang for Your Buck / Mumia / Strato-Cradle by Prince of Space

Lucinda / Bobby-Jack's Story/ ThornHo / Dropper / RigHo / Heavy D / Scrapfisher / Technopath, by Weregoat

Loss of Humanity, by Hexenritter

Roast Beef Injection, by Crazycryodude

Dropper / Xenoapiarist, by sheep-dodger

That Bee Ain't Right, by DogKisser

Hazard Doggles, by Swedish Thaumocracy

#iLoveLife selfies, courtesy of Necrotech PMVS

Academy of Titan's Horrorspiration Series

Rook's Zodiac Hagiography, by DogKisser

Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Nov 16, 2018 around 02:43

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011







Hazel: It must be intimidating, to know you're about to be hurled into a life-or-death struggle, in an unforgiving toxic wasteland, against enemies ten times bigger than you are. Can you imagine?

Cawsey: Well, the Wreckers are all administered a healthy cocktail of potent sedatives and muscle relaxants before their drop. You know, Hazel, you want to be as loose as possible when you plow into the earth like the fist of a vengeful space god.

Hazel: And I suppose it's nice to go out happy if your braking thrusters and drag chutes fail and you dig your own grave at 12,000 kph. Not that that's happened since Series 4...

Cawsey: Though there was Series 6, when the explosive bolts on Jobro Deel's pod hatch failed to detonate, if I recall correctly.

Hazel: Poor bastard boiled like a soykaf. Speaking of, while our Wreckers are poured into their drop pods, let's go to Field Observer Eurydice Mann-Chong down planetside, to tell us about tonight's theatre of conflict. Scintillate us, Eury!"



Eurydice: Hazel, it's hard to believe that this dried up turd of a landscape was once a sparkling, healthy sea! You might think ol' Eury's is plunking your twanger.
But then explain all the boats, Hazel, explain all the boats!
I am many things to many enforcement agencies, but never a twanger-plucker, friends. Never a twanger-plucker.

Hazel: I think the heat may be getting to Eury; we'll come back to--

Eurydice: Let me finish, you bob-headed tank-job! This...is SALT.





Eurydice: Here in this parched seabed, the skeletons of commerce lay bare for the taking. Wreckers will deploy along the Southern and Eastern reaches of the map, and that is also where the five Strato-Cradles can be found if things get a little too hot for them.

Shipwrecks abound, many still loaded with valuable resources, ripe for the harvesting.

Reports of scavenger camps in the north (08.00; 05.03) have been confirmed by our recon spotters, possibly a source of materiel support, or a shallow grave!

At (09.00), enterprising Wreckers will find the Luxe Crucible, where they can convert gear and upload luxe to the Sponsors in forlorn hope of aid!

Towering over the ruin at (07.05) is that precarious aerial we call the Scan Tower, ideal for getting an unobstructed view of your scenic environs, and the friendly people who inhabit it!

I hope you popped your rad-bans if you poke around near (10.05)! An old submarine is marooned here, a monument to the follies of ancient, poorly-organized, un-televised warfare! Who knows what treasures this stinking carcass holds? The whole area surrounding it is a radioactive shitshow, though, so look out!

But while you're exploring this quaint locality, keep your head-joints fully articulated, because SALT's roaming midboss rig would be happy to tear them off for you! That's right, an αlpha Titan, not content to sit and wait, is roaming these cracked flats looking for Wrecker rear end to stomp!

Finally, head up Northwest, and you'll find the ruins of the old coastal refineries. A good place for a fuel cache, or an Ambush! And at (00.00), in that crumbling prosperity graveyard, you'll find the Zodiac Beacon. Death is certain if you activate the Beacon and summon this map's boss, but remember that whichever Wrecker does so claims an additional 50 Luxe bounty!

Cawsey: Good poo poo. Compelling poo poo. Tell us about the Zodiac, loving Eurydice.

Eurydice: Hold on to your potatoes, because this is where the real Wrecking Crew starts. This bottomland's king rear end-hander is...



Eurydice: The return of an old favorite: The 3066-B Cancer! This hulking Dredge-Excavator was born to tear it up. 360 degree mobility, with a massive steel-shearing claw capable of tearing the hull off a fuel tanker and an earth-moving shovel more than capable of digging the grave of what's left of the Wreckers that got too close.
Add to that an ultra high pressure water cannon, and a full payload of demolition drones, and no one is safe from the ravages of Cancer!

Wreckers, death and glory await in SALT. But mostly death. Hazel?



Hazel: Thanks, Eury. Looks like quite the run ahead of us, wouldn't you say, Cawsey?

Cawsey: A real snallygaster, Hazel. Let's hope our Wreckers are feeling no pain right now, because there's going to be plenty to go around soon enough.


Slots are still available!

Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Jun 20, 2018 around 18:29

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011



Not Alex posted:

I am an egg.

You Are An Egg.

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






Hazel: The waiting is intense, Rev, and I'm not the one drugged up and strapped to a flying coffin. Any insights on what might be percolating in our esteemed Wreckers' heads right now?

Ocho: Hazel, it reminds me of the last time I myself danced on the edge of glory. Licensed D-Stream Viewers of the Human Diaspora, let Reverend Ocho regale you with a split-knuckled tale of the Hacktogon, and the doughty Fustigatorians who went unto Muscle Jesus in that holy cloud of blood and teeth.

Hazel: You know I'm always primed for a story of lithe, glistening athletes being pounded into so many coldcuts, Rev, but this no-doubt enthralling digression will have to wait. Our Producer is telling me that the last Wreckers have been secured in their enclosures.

Female VO: Pods locked. Wreckers Ready.
AUDIO: Stepwave Gravitone Instrumental (Hi-Tension)

Ocho: Hope you already procured your beverage of choice, because pods are hot to drop in 3.

Hazel: 2.

Both: 1!

AUDIO: Destruction of the Airhorn Homeworld
Female VO: Pods away. WRECKING CREW begins.






Sponsors Only Map!


1. Bobby-Jack Johnson
Your pod veers off-course!
You begin at (00.06).

2. Stev Ansahok
Your pod veers off-course!
You begin at (01.09).

3. Cryo
You begin at (00.11).

4. "Midge" Gureyevitch
Your pod veers off-course!
You begin at (02.10)

5. Stranger
You begin at (04.11)

6. Kal Risso
You begin at (06.11)

7. Operative Delta
You begin at (08.11)

8. Doobrie
You begin at (10.11)

9. Scramble
You begin at (13.11)





Wreckers, take your movements, and remember to spoiler tag!

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011




Only movement in this phase, please.

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011



Update is coming tonight, so get in your move if you haven't!

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011





Sweet parallax! Did you see that, Hazel?

That, dear Reverend, was almost curtains for Johnson and Ansahok.
The groan from our Sponsor's Lounge was audible when those two out-of-control pods plowed smoking ballistic trails a hair's-breadth from one another! Don't pound that Dislike just yet, gentle viewers; with all the pod-scatter, it looks like Stev and Midge are right on top of each other. Could we be seeing a first-round elimination in the making?

Wouldn't be the first, Hazel, and it won't be the last.

So no instant flaming disqualifications this time, but they call this first segment The Funnel for a reason. Our Wreckers are packed in tight, and who knows how their drugged-out, drop-battered minds will react to first contact?


1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Moves to 03.05!


Shabash! That shipwreck is heavy with sweet, sweet salvage!

Heavy with salvage, and strewn with unexploded warheads from the Water Wars III-IV! And...what's that? It looks like Bobby-Jack's digging has disturbed a squad of Gamma Enforcers!

Somebody's gonna blow up tonight, Hazel. I can feel it in my bones and organs.


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Progress halted at 02.09 by a Wrecker encounter!
"Midge" Gureyevitch encountered!

Contact, Hazel! We've got real-rear end, Wrecker-to-Wrecker contact!
I've never seen a man under a K-Hammer. I've always been...curious.


3. CRYO
Moves to 01.09
Encounters empty drop pod!

Cryo here just found...I do believe that's Stev's pod.

I wish her much joy of it.


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Moves to 02.09
Stev Ansahok encountered!

They might team up, Hazel. This doesn't necessarily have to end with a man's head transformed into a high-protein snack spread by a kinetic accelerator on a stick.

Technically, sure.


5. STRANGER
Moves to 06.09!


Another camera, another shipwreck full of loot and bombs.

No hostiles, though...what's our mu...uh, newtype here gonna make of this...Is that some kind of wizard, Hazel?

The world has moved on, dear Ocho.


6. KAL RISSO
Moves to 06.09


Risso finds an unfortunate fellow traveleler in this doomed spiral of desire and regret, and it looks like he's pinned down by...Aw, here we go! Here we go!

A Beta Enforcer! I'd wondered if we were going to see any Betas on the first map.


7. OPERATIVE DELTA

Delta's pod hasn't opened...dare we hope for a malfunction?

He could've just blacked out from the G-Forces. Or it's a cunning Ambush. Or he's dead already.

Better hope he makes a move before the lung bandits catch up with him!


8.DOOBRIE
Progress halted at 11.11 by an encounter!


The mutant enemy is fielding cosplayers now?


9. SCRAMBLE
Moves to 13.11


Looks like Scramble might be poached. I doubt all the king's horses and all the king's men...something something land mines.

Assuming he doesn't blow up, he's still got to contend with those muties tracking him down across the flats and cracking open his skull for that spicy, spicy head-meat! Broof'n!

She, Rev. The freakish mutant egg creature identifies as female.

My apologies, my judgement is impaired when I'm just so hungry for Auntie K's Original Spicy Head-Meat©! Now with meat!




Wreckers, if you're in an Encounter, please post your Combat actions, or, if you're with a non-hostile NPC or PC you don't want to kill, your non-combat interactions!




Sponsor-Only Map!

Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Dec 2, 2017 around 21:08

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011



Not Alex posted:

(So I have no idea if I'm doing combat right here. I'm assuming without a weapon I can't attack, but wasn't sure if there are restrictions on improvising. Also not sure what a toxic zone does but sounds fun)

No worries, you're golden.
Toxic zones deal 1 damage during hazard phase.

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011



Because it may be shortly relevant, to avoid potential headaches, PVP Attack rolls will be rolled by me.

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011




We can't take late moves for logistical reasons, but you'll be able to do the second thing you posted (but in your current hex) during Action Phase.

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011





1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Retreats to 02.05

Johnson still angling for that Squidpack sponsorship, it seems.

They put out a fine product, Hazel, what can I say?


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Stev topples a Car Tower!
Midge takes refuge in audacity!
Car Tower is downgraded to d4!
Car tower misses Midge!: 1d4 2

Was that...Did the Power of Friendship just deflect an assload of falling cars, or did we just witness divine intervention?

Muscle Jesus helps those who don't look at explosions, Hazel. Midge had no fear of hundreds of tons of twisted metal crashing down on him without regard for life or decency! A true Fustigatorian in play here tonight!


3. CRYO
No Encounter.

Cryo takes a moment to take stock. And you'll be kicking yourself if you don't take one of these stocks! Perseid-8 Collapsible Field Stocks are the number one choice for Headhunters on the go!


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Stev topples a Car Tower!
Midge takes refuge in audacity!
Car Tower is downgraded to d4!
Car tower misses Midge!: 1d4 2

If you're so hot on Gureyevitch, why don't you plural marry him?

You think he likes Neo-Cathayan opera?


5. STRANGER

Stranger is justifiably more interested in salvage than whatever faustian bargain the wwizard is no doubt offering.

Wizards are an untrustworthy breed, with no more inherent sense of right or wrong than a mutant.


6. KAL RISSO
Retreats to 07.08

Risso, choosing to reserve the milk of human kindness for later consumption, and better part of valoring away from the Beta.

Risso may be a twisted mockery of God's creation, but he knows his rear end when he sees it.


7. OPERATIVE DELTA

Delta, refreshed from his orbital ballistic nap, seems to be scouting out the horizon.

Hazel, is this the same Delta that assassinated the Premier of Neo-Madagascar?

Allegedly assassinated. Alleged Premier.


8.DOOBRIE
Mr. Stinger lost!

Can't trust a time traveler, Doobrie! What are you doin' down there?

Please, Rev. As if you could deny a man with shades like those anything. What does the bible say, "Front ye not lest ye be fronted?"

9. SCRAMBLE
12.11 is now a Toxic Zone!
Mutant Grunt 1 misses Scramble!
Mutant Grunt 2 hits Scramble! No damage!
Mutant Stalker hits Scramble!: 1d6 4: 1 Damage to Scramble!

Scramble's cooking with gas, now, and look at those muties fry! They're going to be a shell of their former selves once those chems boil off!

Maybe slow down on the egg puns before you hurt yourself, Rev. Game's still young.





Alright, Wreckers! Get in your actions a fast as your sweaty manipulators can ram your input actuators! Gogogo!



Sponsor-Only Map!

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011




Unfortunately, your inexplicable surplus of green barrels will have to wait until next round's Encounter Phase.

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Salvages for 5 Luxe!

I'm sure up in the Sponsor's Lounge, the TeuthisCorp rep is giving some serious thought to the future of one Bobby-Jack Johnson.

Yes, I'm sure Madame Inque is chewing her canape contemplatively.


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Salvages for 3 Luxe!


3. CRYO
Salvages for 4 Luxe!

Cryo, dismantling Stev's pod for fun and profit.

Fair's fair, Hazel. Any one of those pods would dismantle a Wrecker, given the probletunity.


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Scanning...

Wrecker Cryo detected at 1.09!
Wrecker Stranger detected at 04.08!
Encounter Wireless Wwizard detected at 04.08!


Now we're talking, Hazel. If those contacts are anything to go by, we're about to have church!

Amen, Rev.

5. STRANGER
Salvages Rich Salvage with Flexible Snout for 16 Luxe!

Hazel. Hazel. What's wrong with his face, Hazel?

I think it's some kind of...loot-sensitive proboscis?

Every day, we stray farther from God's light, Hazel.


6. KAL RISSO
Salvages for 2 Luxe!

I'd wondered. About Risso's whole face situation under that mask. Were we talking tentacles, some unsavory trunk like Stranger's packing, or just another, smaller face?

Are you disappointed?

Be lying if I said I wasn't a little, Hazel.


7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Salvages for 1 Luxe


8.DOOBRIE
Scanning...

Wrecker Scramble detected at 12.11!
Encounter Landmines detected at 12.11!
Encounter Mutant Stalker detected at 12.11!
Scan provides safety from Landmines!


And another interesting bit of scanning.

I'm feeling it, Hazel. That hype's gettin' chufty.


9. SCRAMBLE
Scanning...

Scan provides safety from Landmines!
Wrecker Doobrie detected at 11.11!


So much for an Ambush.

Looks like we might have ourselves an old-fashioned Stomp-de-doo, Haze. Broof'n!




SCRAMBLE
Toxic Zone!
Scramble takes 1 damage!
Mutant Grunt 1 takes 1 damage and dies!
Mutant Grunt 2 takes 1 damage and dies!
Mutant Stalker takes 1 damage!
2 Luxe is uploaded to Scramble's account for mutant bounties!
20 Luxe is uploaded to Scramble's account to reward the First Kill!





Now things have started in earnest.

Some early action, Hazel, a near miss or two, and a possible teamup! Not bad as beginnings go.

Before we continue, let's thank some of Our Generous Sponsors that have brought us tonight's event.




Female VO: The makers of WRECKING CREW would like to thank the following Sponsors:

quote:

Dr. Yith's Cyber-Driver
Vesuvius Space BBQ Supply
Green Barrels, Inc.
Pertinax Ammunition Fabrication Systems
Perseid Munitions Concern
and
TeuthisCorp

Touch the embedded streamlink and use the verbal rebate token "REKT" for a 5% discount on purchases from Our Sponsors.
And now, Wrecker account standings:

1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON 0 Luxe uploaded.
2. STEV ANSAHOK 0 Luxe uploaded.
3. CRYO 0 Luxe uploaded.
4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH 0 Luxe uploaded.
5. STRANGER 0 Luxe uploaded.
6. KAL RISSO 0 Luxe uploaded.
7. OPERATIVE DELTA 0 Luxe uploaded.
8.DOOBRIE 0 Luxe uploaded.
9. SCRAMBLE 22 Luxe uploaded.



Wreckers, Show Me Your Moves!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Dec 5, 2017 around 02:44

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011




Sir, this is a drive-thru Movement Phase. If you don't want to move, I can go ahead and lock that combat action in for Encounter Phase, though!

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011



Shogeton posted:

Vesuvius Space BBQ supply
"Say, a query to the Wrecking Crew's PR, is it possible to make announcements to the contestants? Not to reveal anything of course, but to encourage certain actions and promise considerations in the future?"

Hexenritter posted:

Pertinax Ammunition Fabrication Systems
I'd like to second the query posted by our fellow sponsor. Can we giant holohead messages to Wreckers?

Female VO: Thank you, Sponsors! You will find many functions on your dispatch panel, including Wrecker communications. Be advised, these communications may be witnessed by anyone nearby.

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Moves to 02.02!


Johnson making a move, coming across what I think is a half-buried chemical silo. Think there are any goodies inside, Rev?

If his luck holds out, it's a heaping grip of luxe-fodder. If not...maybe a nest of angry radcoons?


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Moves to 04.08


Our first team-up is coming in with heads all a-swivel, Hazel. Expecting a spicy surprise.

Speaking of spicy...Viewers, use verbal rebate token, "REKT," for 10% off your next purchase of Auntie K's Original Spicy Head-Meat©, Auntie K's Incandescent Jerk Head-Meat©, or Auntie K's Piri-Piri Headshot Head-Meat©.

3. CRYO
Moves to 01.07


Whoops.


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Moves to 04.08


Stranger's long-gone, but let's see what happens.

Off to see the wwizard, Haze.

5. STRANGER
Progress halted by Encounter at 05.06!


I think that used to be a bus.


6. KAL RISSO
Progress halted by Encounter at 08.08!


What do you think, Hazel? VTOL fighter?

Food truck, I think. Big plastic taco gives it away.


7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Moves to 06.09


Delta hot on Risso's backtrail; we gonna see some of those hot-shot stealth assassin tricks at work, Hazel?

Engaging a Beta Enforcer is definitely next-level stealth.


8.DOOBRIE
Moves to 12.11 and enters a Toxic Zone!


Doobrie scaring up a heap of trouble here. You gotta ask what's the play here, Hazel. Team up against that mutie, or duck out before the fumes turn his lungs to sweet, sweet chowder.


9. SCRAMBLE
No movement.


Scramble staying put. Risky.

Scramble may be about to have a great fall, Hazel.




Wreckers, Encounters Ahoy!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Dec 6, 2017 around 04:30

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Pass.


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Pass.
A Wwizard eyes Stev suspiciously!


3. CRYO
Gamma Attacks: 4#1d6 6 2 1 4
Gamma Enforcer 1 attacks Cryo! Cryo takes 1 damage!
Gamma Enforcer 2 misses Cryo!
Gamma Enforcer 3 misses Cryo!
Gamma Enforcer 4 attacks Cryo! Cryo takes 1 damage!

Cryo topples a car tower!
Gamma Enforcer 1 takes 5 damage and is destroyed!
Gamma Enforcer 2 takes 5 damage and is disabled!
Gamma Enforcer 3 takes 5 damage and is destroyed!
Gamma Enforcer 4 takes 5 damage and is destroyed!

8 Luxe is uploaded to Cryo's account for Rig bounties!
10 Luxe is uploaded to Cryo's account for a Quad Kill!

Seas of Enceladus, what a massacre!

The first thing they tell these rig pilots in training has to be, 'Don't cluster near the car tower.'

It's just a weekend course, Haze, don't be too hard on them.

Well, with one of those rigs still usable, we might get to see if Cryo can do better in the cockpit.


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Pass.


5. STRANGER
Pass.


6. KAL RISSO
Pass.


7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Retreats to 05.08!

No one wants to play with that poor Beta!


8.DOOBRIE
Red barrels explode!
Mutant Stalker takes 2 damage and is killed!

2 Luxe is uploaded to Doobrie's account for mutant bounties!

I suppose that answers that. An armistice, if not an alliance.

An explosive start to a relationship, Hazel.


9. SCRAMBLE

Mutant Stalker attacks Scramble!: 1d6 5 Scramble takes 1 damage!

Green barrels detonate!
The Toxic Zone in 12.11 intensifies!

Barrel party!

It's getting awfully smoky; might need to activate the IR cams on the drones.



Wreckers, submit your Action orders!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Dec 7, 2017 around 03:52

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011



Next update is coming today: Get your Action orders in!

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Scanning...
...........................................................
..................................... ...........................................
No contacts!


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Salvages for 5 Luxe!

3. CRYO
Salvages 3 Gamma Rigs for 27 Luxe!
Gamma Enforcer Mounted!


Now it's on, Hazel. Cryo's a real force to be reckoned with from here on out.

With as much as she's bleeding, though, the upholstery in that thing is going to be ruined.


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH

A Wwizard shrugs and pulls out a shotgun!

Uh-oh! Don't engage with a wwizard, Midge. Wwizard ethics are nebulous.

At best!

Try zis, beeg man....can always to making more.



A Wwizard vanishes!

Oh. That went...differently than I expected.


5. STRANGER
Salvages Rich Salvage for 8 Luxe!


6. KAL RISSO
Salvages Rich Salvage for 6 Luxe!


7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Scanning...
Wrecker Stev Ansahok detected at 04.08!
Wrecker Midge Gureyevitch detected at 04.08!
Scan complete.



8.DOOBRIE
Salvages for 2 Luxe!


9. SCRAMBLE
Salvages for 2 Luxe!




Doobrie and Scramble
Intense Toxic Zone!
Doobrie takes 2 damage!
Scramble takes 2 damage!

They'd better make with the pronto exfiltratio, Hazel! Neither of these Wreckers can stand up to any more of that kind of metabolic damage!

I'm sure it's fine.





Here it is, the third round. And the first two have been something.

No Wreckers down just yet, Haze, but we got a few looking pretty melty around the edges!

New hardware on the field, and our first mounted wrecker. Things are heating up, so let's thank our Sponsors for making tonight's festivities possible.



quote:

Female VO: The makers of WRECKING CREW would like to thank EZ-Value Pilot Instruction for providing pilots for tonight's festivities. Tired of your grinding dead-end job? Try a new, exciting career as a rig pilot! Corporate Security, Private Military, Food Service, and Municipal Authorities all need enforcers, and you can fill that need! A thrilling work environment, competitive wages, and benefits that...exist, all await you on the off-world colonies when you're behind the canopy of a 35 thousand KG wrecking machine! Let EZ-Value Pilot Instruction fit you in the servo-coffin that matches your dreams! With 12 transjovian campuses, it's easy to find one near you!

EZ-Value Pilot Instruction: Your life, rigged!

quote:

And now, Wrecker upload account standings:

1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON 0 Luxe uploaded.
2. STEV ANSAHOK 0 Luxe uploaded.
3. CRYO 18 Luxe uploaded.
4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH 0 Luxe uploaded.
5. STRANGER 0 Luxe uploaded.
6. KAL RISSO 0 Luxe uploaded.
7. OPERATIVE DELTA 0 Luxe uploaded.
8.DOOBRIE 2 Luxe uploaded.
9. SCRAMBLE 22 Luxe uploaded.



Wreckers, get a Move on!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Dec 8, 2017 around 19:42

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Movement halted at 02.01 by Encounter!



This must be one of the rarely seen masters of the mutant horde.

Witness the brain-veins on this lǎo piáo! Inky Johnson had better cap that dome with alacrity if he doesn't want to cop a mind bullet to his!

A clutch display of marksmanship would be entirely out of character for Johnson.


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Moves to 04.06!


We're receiving a transmission from...Dr. Yith's Cyber-Driver! With an immediate promotional opportunity for lunar veteran Ansahok!

The blood, sweat, and tears...those are all really great, Hazel, you need that poo poo. But if you don't get your luminous visage into those consumers' streams, you're just a bloody, sweaty, weep-boy.


3. CRYO
Moves to 01.05!

The scrambled coords read: (xx.10)


Looks like some potentially valuable data, Rev...

But it looks like she'll have to prize it from the ooze-slick, slithering mouthparts of some kind of designer bio-mod gone feral!


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Unbalanced K-Hammer lost!
Moves to 04.07!


The scrambled coords read: (04.xx)

The key to a priceless treasure...or at least part of it.

And your priceless treasures are in good hands with Q-Stash Pro! Protect your valuable engrams from identity printers, and get 10% off the first month's subscription when you sign up with the verbal rebate token REKT.
Q-Stash Pro: Because life's too short to be murdered by your own bootleg clone.


5. STRANGER
Movement halted at 07.06! Intercepted by Encounter!


Well, Stranger had a sweet old run, Hazel, but now the big murder daddy deluxe is in play.

Stranger's only hope might be to outrun it, Rev. The Titan is dogged, and that main gun will shred any Wrecker fool enough to face it.

And those feet are made for stomping, Haze. They'll stomp right over anyone who gets between the Titan and its prey.

quote:

Female VO: Hardened gives a Rig a chance to ignore effects that specifically target the functioning of rigs, such as Glitching and Jacking.
Trample causes a 1d6/1 attack to a non-target Wrecker in a space passed over by the Alpha during its Pursuit.

6. KAL RISSO
Moves to 10.08!



A good-rear end haul, Hazel, but not an uncontested one!

No, it looks like another of Bottom's wretched denizens has claimed this prize for their own.

That tongue is deeply unsavory, Haze. Deeply. Unsavory.


7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Moves to 06.06


Gobble up that savory loot-meat, Op-D!

A little on-site procurement for our alleged assassin.

Hazel, this is the guy who coasted into Nuevo Mali's Ministry of Defense on a glider and decapitated the Deputy Minister, also with a glider.

Let's not peddle hearsay, Rev, you know the RNM authorities deemed that a suicide.


8.DOOBRIE
Scan prevents landmines!
Moves to 11.09



Ouch. Out of the frying pan, into...the opposite...of that.

That's never a problem at Mama Lai's Dumpling Imperium. Mama's algo-dumps are sealed and pressure-fried in only the finest reclaimed food-grade lubricant.

I tell you, Haze, I should sure go for some cool ranch mapo tofu right now.

Good news, Rev! Use the verbal rebate token REKT for a free small appetizer when you order a 40-pack of blue, green, or blue-green algo-dumps!

Delici—Wait, Haze, something's happening!

Is that...?



Shukran, amigo, your antique garbo was just the thing for the Sultana's Quinceañera. Hope you're not rustled, but I forked your dingus a bit. Smell ya later!
A "Time Traveler" vanishes!

Hazel?

Forget it, Rev. Just call the TimeCops and forget it.


9. SCRAMBLE
Scan prevents landmines!
moves to 11.10!

Scramble trying to keep up with Doobrie, but she's in no condition.

Neo-Chivalry is dead, Hazel. The Knights of Europa killed it when they seeded Luna Prime with those polymer-eating macrophages. Wǒpēi nasty poo poo, Hazel.

Now's not the time to relitigate the Moon Wars, Rev. Anyway, Doobrie may have just been clearing the way for Scramble; she seems safe for the time being, or safe as you get down there, at least.



Wreckers, reach out and Encounter someone!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011



Female VO: Decree weather sats have reported a change in atmospheric particulates. Marksmen may find their optics affected; be prepared to compensate.

OOC: Headhunter talent has been tweaked to activate on any multiple of 4, not just 4.

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Retreats to 02.02!

Johnson, falling back to a secure position.

Ink 'em up, Inky, ink 'em up!


2. STEV ANSAHOK

You think Dr. Yith's could implant an internal squidpack?

My understanding is that they were recalled during prelimary release due to health concerns.

Sounds overly cautious for TeuthisCorp, Haze.

I believe the reports mentioned beaks, anomalous as well as something they called eruptions, tentacular? I'm not a doctor.


3. CRYO

quote:

Red Barrels Explode! Squamous Horror is unaffected!
Squamous Horror attacks! Cryo's Gamma Enforcer takes 2 damage!

That upsetting critter just no-sold Cryo's play hard

That Enforcer's armor isn't going to hold up much longer. That's a mass-production model, not rated for digestion.


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH

With both clues on the field, your boy Midge could stack tall luxe if he manages to track down Cryo.

Cryo might be lodged in a lizard colon by then, but it's a worthy strat, Haze!


5. STRANGER

quote:

Green Barrels detonate! 07.06 is now a Toxic Zone!
Alpha Titan opens fire on Stranger!
Stranger takes 4 damage and is KILLED! is reduced to 1 HP by a near-fatal blow!

How did Stranger survive that?! He should have been as shredded as the special carnitas at Don Jupiter's (Verbal rebate token REKT for a free sopapilla tonight only!)

If newtypes were so easy to kill, Rev, the Genome War wouldn't have had 3 sequels. It'll still be a tall order to survive that toxic waste, though.


6. KAL RISSO

quote:

Squamous Horror attacks Kal Risso and misses!
Car Tower topples! Squamous Horror takes 5 damage and dies!

5 Luxe is uploaded to Kal Risso's account as a bounty!

Another impressive car kill. Is a theme emerging?

The Bobby-Jack Squidpack Supercut is going to have some competition on the StreamHive tonight!


7. OPERATIVE DELTA

Delta has got this stalking game down cold.

He's gonna pounce eventually, Hazel, and you know it's gonna be stone-niúbī when he does!


8.DOOBRIE

quote:

Doobrie harpoons Beta Enforcer! Beta Enforcer takes 3 damage and is disabled for the round!

My man! Out of nowhere with a sick sting on that Beta! Doobrie is rapidly transforming, Hazel, into someone with whom not to gently caress!

Time-hacks have got to be against a rule somewhere...


9. SCRAMBLE

With that Beta brought to heel, Scramble and Doobrie are going to be a team to be reckoned with.

There's gonna be a fire sale at the reckoning store, Haze. Just handing that poo poo out like cheap concu-bot flyers at the spaceport.




Wreckers, take Action!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Salvages for 10 Luxe!


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Cutting a Promo!:19!
19 Luxe has been uploaded to Stev Ansahok's account for Promotional Considerations!


3. CRYO
Cryo heals 1 HP!

4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Salvages for 6 Luxe!


5. STRANGER
RIP!


6. KAL RISSO
Salvages 2x Rich Salvage for 19!


7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Scanning...
....................................................
Wrecker Stranger detected at 07.06!
Alpha Titan detected at 07.06!



8.DOOBRIE
Scanning...
........................................................
.........................................................
Wrecker Scramble detected at 11.10!



9. SCRAMBLE
Salvages for 4 Luxe!




Stranger
Toxic Zone!
Stranger takes 1 damage and is KILLED!

5 Luxe is uploaded to the accounts of surviving Wreckers!
A death beacon is lit at 07.06!

Viewers, use your feedback consoles to pay respects! We have a Wrecker down!

Let's see our Pertinax Ammunition Fabrication Systems REKT Replay!



Savage! And if that concentrated biowaste could do that to Stranger, imagine what it could do to you or your contractual dependents!

Trust Green Barrels Inc. for all your waste removal and storage solutions. Use rebate token REKT for a free estimate*! Don't go sterile; trust the Green Barrel!

First kill, Haze.

The first of many.

*Free estimate does not include labor, transit, or 16.8% service charge.




Enter the death spiral, Hazel!

A little early for that degree of bloodthirst, Rev.

Enter it!



quote:

Female VO: Round 4 Promotional Bonus! This round only, Upload capacity has been released to wrecker devices! At any time before Round 5 begins, Wreckers may upload any amount of Luxe-on-hand to their accounts.

Current Account Standings:
1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON: 5L
2. STEV ANSAHOK: 24L
3. CRYO: 23L
4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH: 5L
6. KAL RISSO: 10L
7. OPERATIVE DELTA: 5L
8.DOOBRIE: 7L
9. SCRAMBLE: 27L




Get moving, Wreckers, and remember that you can freely upload Luxe this round!




Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Dec 12, 2017 around 22:16

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Moves to 01.02




2. STEV ANSAHOK
Moves to 03.05! and encounters Cryo!


mounted on:

Well hello there, murder friends.

Now Hazel, I'm not a prognosticator of any stripe, but old Ocho's got a finely tuned explosion sense. And something, Hazel, is gonna explode.


3. CRYO
Moves to 03.05! and encounters Stev Ansahok!




A lot of rigs, a lot of bombs, a lot of luxe waiting to be peeled.

Broof'n.


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Moves to 04.06!

Your boy Midge had better catch up with his partner, Rev, or he's quickly going to become available.


6. KAL RISSO
Moves to 12.06!



That key could prevent quite a bit of complication, if Risso can get it to the hidden coordinates of the vault.

One has to ask, Hazel, if preventing Wrecker complications are in the best interest of either the sponsors or viewers.


7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Scans show Alpha Titan moving to 07.05>08.06>08.05!
Moves to 07.06!

Operative Delta discovers Stranger's corpse, containing Holotag and 24 Luxe!

Our Delta, right place, right time.

Almost as if he planned it. Starting to believe, Haze?

Belief is death's midwife, Rev.


8.DOOBRIE
No movement.

What's your read on the emerging Doobrie-Scramble situation, Rev? A true burgeoning of mutual admiration on the battlefield, or a naked grab for sponsor optics?

Raw emotion is for kids and rad-vics, Hazel. No love is more deliberate and examined than a promotional stunt. Also sometimes one of them is an egg, but we don't judge here in the stately pleasure dome.


9. SCRAMBLE
Moves to 11.09!

Supply drone incoming. The late Señor Dumpty may have fared better with a DPM.

The most reliable shotgun on the market, Haze, and one of Daimyo-Pfeffern's biggest sellers. Advanced cermet and polymer construction can stand up the most inhospitable environments with ease, and the finish wipes clean with a damp cloth!


quote:

Sponsors

Vesuvius Space BBQ purchases the Drone Delivery of a DPM Shotgun on behalf of Scramble for 33 Luxe! It will arrive during Sponsor Phase.

The new Wrecker account standings are:

1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON 5L
2. STEV ANSAHOK 24L
3. CRYO 54L
4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH 12L
6. KAL RISSO 37L
7. OPERATIVE DELTA 5L
8.DOOBRIE 7L
9. SCRAMBLE 0L






Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Retreats to 01.01!


2. STEV ANSAHOK
A collapsing sinkhole snares Gamma Enforcer 1, disabling it!
A collapsing sinkhole snares Gamma Enforcer 2, disabling it!
A collapsing sinkhole snares Gamma Enforcer 3, disabling it!
A collapsing sinkhole snares Gamma Enforcer 4, disabling it!

A wisp of acrid blue smoke curls from an unexploded warhead...But nothing happens.


3. CRYO
Cover taken; enemy attacks downshifted!


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
No encounter.


6. KAL RISSO
Retreats to 13.05!


7. OPERATIVE DELTA
No encounter.


8.DOOBRIE
No encounter.


9. SCRAMBLE
No encounter. You'll have to mount on Action Phase.




Wreckers, take Action!

quote:

Wrecker account standings are as follows:

1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON: 5L.
2. STEV ANSAHOK: 24L.
3. CRYO: 54L.
4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH: 12L.
6. KAL RISSO: 37L.
7. OPERATIVE DELTA: 5L.
8.DOOBRIE: 9L.
9. SCRAMBLE: 0L.



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Dec 15, 2017 around 12:33

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Salvages for 2 Luxe!
Uploads 12 Luxe!



2. STEV ANSAHOK
Salvages for 3 Luxe!
Received 20 Luxe and 7 Fuel from Cryo!
Uploads 20 Luxe, bringing totals to 9L on-hand, and 44L uploaded.


A generous gesture from Cryo. This could be a powerful alliance.


3. CRYO
Salvages 3 Gamma Enforcers and Rich Salvage for 39 Luxe and 14 Fuel!
Transfers 20 Luxe to Stev Ansahok!
Uploads 19 Luxe!


Fat pickings, Hazel.

We could be seeing some interesting Sponsor actions soon, Rev.


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Scanning...
Wrecker Stev Ansahok detected at 03.05!
Wrecker Cryo detected at 03.05!
Unstable Ordnance detected at 03.05!
Unstable Ordnance detected at 04.08!



6. KAL RISSO
Salvages for 2!


7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Salvages for 3!
Uploaded Stranger Holotag and 28L!
Sponsor Challenge Complete!
Pertinax AmmoFab is awarded 10 Luxe!
Operative Delta has been awarded a subscription to Cannons and Cephalopods Monthly!
Pertinax Ammofab spends 39 Luxe (10 Sponsor, 29 Wrecker) on behalf of Operative Delta for Drone Delivery of a Strike Beacon! It will arrive during Sponsor Phase.

Now he has an airstrike, ho ho ho!

I'll admit, Rev, you might have had something. It looks like Delta has a plan.

He's a pro, Haze. Where a layman might see delay, a pro sees intricate-rear end timing.


8.DOOBRIE
Uses Medikit and gains 1 HP!


9. SCRAMBLE
Mounts Beta Enforcer!




Operative Delta
Toxic Zone!
Operative Delta takes 1 Damage!





No new hazards, just a little sludge. That's the last time we'll hear that.

Wrecker hate-on for barrels aside, Haze, now that we're past round 4, Our Producer is going to make sure things stay...interesting.

We've got some interesting Sponsor activity; let's take a look.




Drone Delivery! Scramble receives a DPM Shotgun!

quote:

Female VO: The Rampage ability allows excess damage beyond that required to defeat a foe to be applied to another foe in the same zone, with a successful iterative attack.
Drone Delivery! Operative Delta receives a Strike Beacon!

quote:

Female VO: The makers of WRECKING CREW would like to thank our sponsors for their contribution to the Decree's highest-rated combat arena program.

The following Sponsors receive a 5 Luxe stipend for this round's contributions:
Pertinax Ammofab
Vesuvius Space BBQ Supply
Rook EngOrg

Sponsor Account standings:

Pertinax Ammofab 5L (+15, -10)
Vesuvius Space BBQ Supply 5L
Rook EngOrg 5L

Thank you.

quote:

Current Wrecker account standings are as follows:

1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON 17L (+12)
2. STEV ANSAHOK 44L (+20)
3. CRYO 73L (+19)
4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH 12L (+0)
6. KAL RISSO 37L (+0)
7. OPERATIVE DELTA 4L (+28, -29)
8.DOOBRIE 9L (+0)
9. SCRAMBLE 0L (+0)



Wreckers, get moving!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Dec 16, 2017 around 14:26

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
No movement.
Enemy forces emerge!




2. STEV ANSAHOK
No movement.

Enemy forces emerge!



3. CRYO
No movement.

Enemy forces emerge!



4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Moves to 03.05!

Enemy forces emerge!


Loitering has a pesky tendency to attract the undesirable element.


6. KAL RISSO
Moves to 11.03!



7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Moves to 07.05!


Superlative-rear end view from up that tower, Haze.
True facts, Rev. If Delta can pacify the area, not only will he be able to Scan the entire map, but the Range of his weapons will be increased by 1!
Spicy kill-drilling for those swole enough to snatch it.


8.DOOBRIE
Moves to 10.08!



9. SCRAMBLE
Moves to 10.08!





Wreckers, resolve your issues! Sponsors, introduce more issues!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Retreats to 01.00!


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Stev misses Mutant Stalker!


3. CRYO
A collapsing sinkhole snares Mutant Stalker, disabling it!


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Mutant Grunt 1 misses Midge!
Mutant Grunt 2 misses Midge!

Midge attacks Mutant Grunt! Mutant Grunt 1 takes 3 damage and dies!
Shotgun Rampage! Mutant Grunt 2 takes 2 damage and dies!
Shotgun Rampage! Mutant Stalker takes 1 damage!

An unexploded warhead rattles alarmingly...But nothing happens.

2 Luxe are uploaded to Midge Gureyevitch's account for mutant bounties!

Gureyevitch, harnessing fell sorcery to demolish the mutant foe.
Mutants don't like getting shot in the face, Haze; in fact, they hate it. But you'll love the Toxivibe Plus, from Bacillimax. No more daily paralytic injections, Hazel!
You mean there's an easier way to maintain a stylish grimace?
The Toxivibe Plus uses ultrasonic waves to massage open the pores of your face skin and introduce the anaerobic toxins! No needles, no assistant, no mess! Toxivibe Plus, from Bacillimax, The Bugs you Trust.


6. KAL RISSO
Crane boom misses Squamous Horror!
Squamous Horror strikes Kal Risso for 2 damage!

Delphi Pharma spends 18 Luxe on Behalf of Kal Risso for Drone Delivery of an Experimental Rad Innoculation! It will arrive on Sponsor Phase.


7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Retreats to 06.06!



8.DOOBRIE
Doobrie misses Squamous Horror!
Squamous Horror misses Doobrie!

Doobrie dancing on the knife edge of survival here, Haze
He'll either dig deep, grab that white-hot spark of survival instinct, and come out on top despite the towering odds against him, or...He won't do that.


9. SCRAMBLE
Scramble misses Squamous Horror!




Wreckers, take Action!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Dec 20, 2017 around 19:22

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011







1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Salvages for 1 Luxe!


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Receives 3 Luxe from "Midge" Gureyevitch!
Salvages for 5 Luxe!


With Gureyevitch and Cryo together, they've got the entire coordinates for the hidden Vault, Rev.
The key's still in mutant hands, Haze, but keys are for the lazy. Some skill and beef should get them past any so-called security measures.
Just kick down your own door every morning, do you?
You know it, lovely Hazel. The infra-pittance I pay for replacement doors pales in comparison to the raw vigor and confidence the act of door-kicking dumps into my finely-tuned endocrine system and incinerates my complacency.


3. CRYO
Salvages for 5!


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
3 Luxe sent to Stev Ansahok!
Mounts Gamma Enforcer!



6. KAL RISSO
Scanning...
....................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
..................................................................................................
Scan complete. No contacts detected.


Rook EngOrg spends 25 Luxe (6 Sponsor, 19 Wrecker) on behalf of Kal Risso for a Supply Drop! It will arrive on Sponsor Phase.


7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Salvages Rich Salvage for 10 Luxe!


8.DOOBRIE
Scanning...
........................................................................................................................
.............................................................................................
............................................................................................................
Scan complete. No contacts detected.



9. SCRAMBLE
Ambush readied!




Decree Aeropaths have confirmed: A RUSTSTORM is inbound!

Problem: City streets choked with millions of derelict vehicles. Solution? Airborne metal-eating picoswarms to turn that problem into resources.
Hey, what could go wrong? This heavily-redacted climate science book says: Nothing at all!

quote:

Prevailing Conditions for Round 6:
The Salvage Action will produce an additonal 1 Luxe per die!
All successful attacks against Rigs will do 1 additonal damage!
In Hazard Phase, all rigs outside a hex with a structure will take 1 damage!

Additional hazards to be revealed as the ruststorm intensifies!








Mounted Wreckers, wounded wreckers, upgraded weapons and a ruststorm.
The lives of our competitors teeter on a knife's edge, Haze. A precarious-rear end balance between glory and oblivion, with praise to the victor and woe to the conquered.
And also Bobby-Jack was there.
Well, regardless of Johnson's ultimate motives, Hazel, you can't deny that he's having a real effect on the texture of the battlefield, for good or dank.
I suppose stirring up a mutant horde qualifies as a texture change.
Bobby-Jack's neighborhood is rapidly gettin' to be the spiciest of neighborhoods.




Supply Drop! A materiel crate has deployed at 11.03!

Drone Delivery! Kal Risso receives an Experimental Rad Innoculation!


Don't believe the label, Risso! Scuttlebutt from the Sponsor Lounge says that hēihuò jab's got some staying power. Hope that's all the extra it's packing! Also, I know how chāo-kù it looks, but jack that jazz into your buttmeat, not your neck. Lookin' at some dissolved-rear end arteries, otherwise, gēmen!

quote:

Female VO: Experimental items cost half the luxe and have their efficacy increased in some way, but will cause unforseen and potentially hazardous side-effects!

quote:

The following Sponsors receive a 5 Luxe stipend this round:
Vesuvius Space BBQ
Delphi Pharma
Rook EngOrg
Consortium BEEZ BEADZ

Sponsor Accounts stand as follows:
Vesuvius Space BBQ: 10L.
Pertinax Ammofab: 5L.
RookEngOrg: 4L.
Dr. Yith's Cyberdriver: 0L.
Delphi Pharma: 5L.
Consortium BEADZ: 5L.

Thank you.

quote:

Current Wrecker Account stands as follows:
1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON: 17L.
2. STEV ANSAHOK: 44L.
3. CRYO: 73L.
4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH: 14L.
6. KAL RISSO: 0L.
7. OPERATIVE DELTA: 4L.
8.DOOBRIE: 9L.
9. SCRAMBLE: 0L.



Wreckers, get moving!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
No movement.



2. STEV ANSAHOK
Moves to 04.07!


Chāo-zhèng gallbladders today, chief. No keeping bile in a bucket for you!


3. CRYO
Moves to 04.07!


Hey, zhèngmēi, got a tube of trauma-paste here, caulk up those bullet holes. Good lean protein, very little radcoon!


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Moves to 04.07!


You like...bonez? Got a special on bonez, mate-dog. Today only, free installation!


6. KAL RISSO
Moves to 10.05!



quote:

If DERELICT is clear of active encounters, you may roll 1d6 to Salvage as usual. Instead of that number of Luxe, however, your roll will determine what premium loot you gain, from a table populated by the items in the image!

If Risso can clear out the opposition, he'll be able to dive in take a chance scrounge up something hopefully good.
It's a risky-rear end propo to stick around, though, Haze; it's a dangeresque enviro. Addo, his banging around might attract more enemies, and any mutants he finds are gonna be all radded-out and kill-horny!

7. OPERATIVE DELTA
No movement.
No encounter.



8.DOOBRIE
Moves to 08.07!



9. SCRAMBLE
No movement.





Encounters, Ho!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Dec 22, 2017 around 18:04

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Retreats to 00.00!

quote:

Female VO: Bobby-Jack Johnson has reached the Zodiac Beacon! As the first Wrecker to do so, 20 Luxe has been uploaded to his account.
Crab battle crab battle crab battle!
It's incredibly charming that you think Johnson will actually do something here, Rev.
Between that global-rear end alert and that sweet little Luxe bump sweetening up his options, Haze, he might just decide now's the time for mas postura activa, broof'n.


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Stev Ansahok's Max HP are increased by 1!
Stev Ansahok suffers malpractice!
Stev Ansahok mutates!

quote:

Stev Ansahok gains the mutation: Amygdalic Hypermegaly!
If enemies are present during Encounter Phase, the subject upscales all attacks, but must attack. In combats where the subject takes damage, the subject's attacks deal double damage!

A little part of your brain you can't even pronounce is grotesquely swollen, and it just makes you so mad!

quote:

Mutatis Mutandis! 10 Luxe has been uploaded to Cryo, Stev Ansahok, and Kal Risso for being the first Wreckers to mutate in the field!


3. CRYO
Cryo's HP are restored by 1!
Cryo suffers malpractice!
Cryo mutates!

quote:

Cryo gains the mutation: Traumatic Scleroderma!
Subject ignores the first 2 damage from attacks, but all of subject's attacks are downscaled during encounters when they are successfully hit by an attack.

Your skin responds to incoming trauma by rapidly keratinizing. It's great protection, but it's hard to pull a trigger with a crab claw.

quote:

Mutatis Mutandis! 10 Luxe has been uploaded to Cryo, Stev Ansahok, and Kal Risso for being the first Wreckers to mutate in the field!

4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Turtle egg! No free samples, shǎguā!


6. KAL RISSO

quote:

Experimental Rad Innoculation
Kal Risso is innoculated against Rad Damage for 3 rounds of exposure!
Kal Risso Mutates!
Kal Risso gains the mutation: Nuclear Reservoir.
When the subject is protected from Radiation damage by an innoculation, they receive a Rad Token. If the subject has more Rad Tokens than HP during Hazard Phase, they lose one Rad Token and transform the current hex into a Rad Zone.

Your mutable flesh has formed a cyst to quarantine radioactive materials away from your unprotected vitals...Careful not to perforate it!

quote:

Mutatis Mutandis! 10 Luxe has been uploaded to Cryo, Stev Ansahok, and Kal Risso for being the first Wreckers to mutate in the field!
Gamma Enforcer attacks Kal Risso! Kal Risso takes 1 damage!
Red Barrels explode! Gamma Enforcer takes 3 damage and is destroyed!


7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Misses Beta Enforcer!


8.DOOBRIE
Doobrie attacks Gamma Crawler! Gamma Crawler takes 4 damage and is disabled!


9. SCRAMBLE
Scramble misses Squamous Horror!
Squamous Horror attacks Scramble! Scramble's Beta Enforcer takes 3 damage and is destroyed!
Scramble ejects safely!




Wreckers take Action!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011



Wreckmas Update is scheduled for tonight, so you still have a couple of hours to get your Action orders in before a heartless machine takes your turn for you!

After tonight's update, game updates will be on holiday hiatus until the 29th; you are welcome and encouraged to continue making Sponsor and/or flavor posts in the meantime. Shèngdàn jié kuàilè, Wreckers!

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Beacon Activated!
50 Luxe is uploaded to Bobby-Jack Johnson's account!

The earth shakes!

The ground erupts!

3066-B CANCER enters the Combat Arena at 00.00!





2. STEV ANSAHOK
Salvages for 4 Luxe!


3. CRYO
Salvages for 4 Luxe!


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Scanning...
Mutant Stalker detected at 03.06!
Wrecker Operative Delta detected at 06.06!
................................................................................................
...........................................................
Scan complete.



6. KAL RISSO
The dive into the Derelict unearths...

Salvages 2x Rich Salvage for 31 Luxe!


7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Ambush prepared!


8.DOOBRIE
Salvages Gamma Crawler for 12 Luxe!


9. SCRAMBLE
Ambush prepared!




Hazard posted:

The Ruststorm Rages!
Cryo's Gamma Enforcer takes 1 damage!
Midge's Gamma Enforcer takes 1 damage!
Alpha Titan takes 1 damage!
3066-B♋ main body takes 1 damage!

The Ruststorm Greatly Intensifies!

Prevailing Conditions for Round 7:
Scan Range is reduced by 1!
Attack Range is reduced by 1!
The Salvage Action will produce twice the listed dice!
All successful attacks against Rigs will do double damage!
In Hazard Phase, all rigs outside a hex with a structure will take 3 damage!

Derelict posted:

DERELICT
Kal Risso is unaffected by Jagged Metal!
Derelict groans alarmingly, but remains stable!












Here we are, Rev.
rear end-Beat Town.
Wreckers, welcome to die.
They're in the oily muscled arms of the Lord, now.




Sponsors posted:

Sponsor Accounts stand as follows:
Vesuvius Space BBQ 10
Pertinax Ammofab 5
RookEngOrg 4
Dr. Yith's Cyberdriver 0
Delphi Pharma 5
Consortium BEADZ 5
Thank you.

Accounts posted:

Current Wrecker account standings:
1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON 87
2. STEV ANSAHOK 54
3. CRYO 83
4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH 14
6. KAL RISSO 10
7. OPERATIVE DELTA 4
8.DOOBRIE 9
9. SCRAMBLE 0

Wreckmas posted:


Time for WRECKMAS!
Supply Drop! A spicy Wreckmas pressie lands at 10.06!
Supply Drop! A spicy Wreckmas pressie lands at 11.03!
Supply Drop! A spicy Wreckmas pressie lands at 07.07!
Supply Drop! A spicy Wreckmas pressie lands at 04.09!
Supply Drop! A spicy Wreckmas pressie lands at 06.06!
Supply Drop! A spicy Wreckmas pressie lands at 12.01!
Supply Drop! A spicy Wreckmas pressie lands at 12.06!
Supply Drop! A spicy Wreckmas pressie lands at 06.03!

Snatch all the loot you can, but beware the Kramp-S Antipersonnel Detonators!




Wreckers, get Moving!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Dec 26, 2017 around 02:33

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






BOSS: 3066-B CANCER
No movement.


1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
No movement.


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Moves to 04.09!



3. CRYO
Moves to 04.08!



4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Moves to 04.08!
Mutant Stalker moves to 03.07!



6. KAL RISSO
Moves to 11.02!




7. OPERATIVE DELTA
Moves to 07.07!




8.DOOBRIE
Moves to 07.07!




9. SCRAMBLE
Moves to 10.07!





Wreckers, Encounter!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Retreats to 00.01!


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Stev Ansahok is...Nice!
He may open his Wreckmas gift on Action Phase!


3. CRYO
No encounter.
How you doin'?



4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
No encounter.
You see a sorta neat looking bug?



6. KAL RISSO
Retreats to 11.03!




7. OPERATIVE DELTA and 8. DOOBRIE
Operative Delta attacks Doobrie! A critical hit! Doobrie takes 4 damage and is killed!
Doobrie attacks Operative Delta and hits! Operative Delta takes 3 damage and is killed!

quote:



25 Luxe is uploaded to the accounts of surviving Wreckers!
Two death beacons are lit at 07.07!

A double kill, and a loot-pile of monarchical density for the taking!
Few sights stir the pump-muscle of the swole to righteous pounding than that of two doughty fightmen, each delivering a karmic strike like a falling star to their worthy foe, and together joining the octogon invisible, that august assembly of fustigatorians in the embrace of Muscle Jesus, hand in hand, all beefs forgotten.
Frankly, I just never tire of seeing a human body impaled by a vehicle-rated electroharpoon.
Sister Hazel speaks true. Smell you later, Doobrie and Operative Delta. Smell you later forever.


9. SCRAMBLE
Scramble Improvises!
Crane Boom misses Mutant Cortex!

Mutant Cortex Enhances Mutant Grunt 1! It gains 1 Max HP and upscales its attack to 1d6!
Mutant Cortex Enhances Mutant Grunt 2! It gains 1 Max HP and upscales its attack to 1d6!
Mutant Cortex Enhances Mutant Grunt 3! It gains 1 Max HP and upscales its attack to 1d6!
Mutant Cortex Enhances Mutant Grunt 4! It gains 1 Max HP and upscales its attack to 1d6!
Mutant Grunt 1 misses Scramble!
Mutant Grunt 2 attacks Scramble! Scramble takes no damage!
Mutant Grunt 3 misses Scramble!
Mutant Grunt 4 misses Scramble!




Wreckers take Action!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






Boss: 3066-B Cancer (49/50 HP)

Survey Remote Deployed! Survey Remote burrows beneath the ground!
Repair Remote Deployed! Repair Remote restores 1 HP to Cancer!

Cancer is deploying its tactical options. Aw, they're cute!
They're little guys, but you'd be a real zhūtóu to ignore them. That repair bit will buff out all those scratches and dings the Wreckers worked so hard to put on Cancer, and the surveyor will track down anybody Grandmaster Snips has lost sight of!
Won't the Ruststorm just grind them down?
Don't worry, Haze! Big C shelters her young, like the mythical duck of legend!


1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Ambush prepared!
Pertinax Ammofab spends 40 Luxe (5 Sponsor, 35 Wrecker) on behalf of Bobby-Jack Johnson to purchase Drone Delivery of a Coffin Nail! It will arrive on Sponsor Phase.


2. STEV ANSAHOK
The Wreckmas Pressie contains: DPM Rifle! Now you have a rifle, ho ho ho!



3. CRYO
Salvages for 7 Luxe!


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Salvages for 7 Luxe!


6. KAL RISSO
Ambush prepared!


9. SCRAMBLE
Scanning...
................................................................................................
Warning! Atmospheric particulates exceed filter tolerance!
0eh`BM#FxcDW1qNpElcMA\Oiu6PK7eq1{eqv]E'Ic/.iYWWfWrecker Meat Bastard detected at 1111110.007!
(U2yL[-Dm7VV*u}1B.<&yfeT%Xl_WnObtuse Mandrill detected at 100.060!
^kVK5_hoN9[`\(&eUq3M~4GMs< :jSSpikes Masterface detected at 010.800!
'#H86CHr4^$QA(BR&CY.EScan incomplete!





Ruststorm posted:

The Ruststorm Rages!
Alpha Titan takes 3 damage (6/10)!
3066-B♋ main body takes 3 damage (47/50)!

The Ruststorm Slackens Greatly!

Prevailing Conditions for Round 8:
The Salvage Action will produce an additonal 1 Luxe per die!
All successful attacks against Rigs will do 1 additonal damage!
In Hazard Phase, all rigs outside a hex with a structure will take 1 damage!
Decree Aeropaths forecast clear skies ahead!


Quite a round, wouldn't you say, Rev?
I could expound at great lyrical length on the ballistic ballet of round previous, dear Hazel! But loyal viewers know Reverend Ocho doesn't break poetic until the breakin's done.
And we very well may be entering endgame, here.


Drone Delivery! posted:

Drone Delivery! A Coffin Nail has arrived for Bobby-Jack Johnson!

Sponsors posted:

Remaining accounts of Wreckers Operative Delta and Doobrie have been transferred (less transaction fee) to the Wrecker Retirement Fund. Any Sponsor purchase may draw from Wrecker Retirement Fund.

The following Sponsors receive a 5 Luxe stipend this round:
Pertinax Ammofab
Lucinda VIII Keel-Thoristew

Sponsor Accounts stand as follows:
Vesuvius Space BBQ 10
Pertinax Ammofab 5
RookEngOrg 4
Dr. Yith's Cyberdriver 0
Delphi Pharma 5
Consortium BEADZ 5
Lucinda VIII Keel-Thoristew 5
Wrecker Retirement Fund 11
Thank you.

Accounts posted:

Current Wrecker account standings:
1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON 77
2. STEV ANSAHOK 79
3. CRYO 108
4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH 39
6. KAL RISSO 35
9. SCRAMBLE 25



Wreckers, get Moving!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Jan 1, 2018 around 02:55

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






Boss: 3066-B Cancer
No movement.


1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
No movement!



Survey Remote emerges!
Survey Remote is eligible for Ambush!


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Moves to 06.09!




3. CRYO
Moves to 06:09!




4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
Moves to 06:09!




6. KAL RISSO
No movement ordered!




9. SCRAMBLE
Moves to 11.06!





Wreckers, Encounter destiny!



Sponsor-Only Map


Bee Bonk fucked around with this message at Jan 2, 2018 around 02:19

Adbot
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Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011






1. BOBBY-JACK JOHNSON
Bobby-Jack Johnson Ambushes Survey Remote with Crane Boom!
Crane Boom misses Survey Remote!
Bobby-Jack Johnson retreats to 00.00!


2. STEV ANSAHOK
Stev Ansahok misses Beta Enforcer!


3. CRYO
Cryo attacks Beta Enforcer! Beta enforcer takes 3 damage and is disabled!


4. "MIDGE" GUREYEVITCH
No Encounter order.


6. KAL RISSO
Retreats to 12.03!


9. SCRAMBLE
Mutant Grunt 1 misses Scramble!
Mutant Grunt 2 misses Scramble!
Mutant Grunt 3 attacks Scramble! Scramble takes no damage!

Scramble attacks Mutant Grunt 1! Mutant Grunt 1 takes 2 damage and dies!
Shotgun Rampage! Mutant Grunt 2 takes 1 damage and dies!

2 Luxe has been uploaded to Scramble's account for mutant bounties!




Wreckers, take Action!



Sponsor-Only Map


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