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 Blood -1, Heart 2, Mind 0, Spirit -1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 0/5 So I'm orderin' a platter of chicharrónes -- here and now, in this place, you just gotta hope they're made of pork -- when the Lady stands and makes her pronouncement. I get amused looks when I clap a hand over my mouth, but it's from long experience. Sometimes, my mouth says things before my brain thinks 'em, y'know? And the Lady is not the type to appreciate witty repartee. She's the last of the Dísir, or at least the last of the dísir around these parts. The dísir were to valkyries what cavemen were to... regular men, I guess. Primitive. Biblical. loving ancient. Eh, whatevs. At least she lets some decent food vendors in. I scan the crowd, uninterested in the fighting. Fighting fuckin' bores me. Why can't we settle disputes with, like, rap battles and poo poo? Or Skaldic insult duels. That sounds like my poo poo, the way Dad tells it. . Although, looking at the board, I see that my favorite puppygirl is up for round two. Gotta remember to put some cred on her. No, I'm here on personal business. I get reminded of that fact hardcore when I duck past a vampire (or maybe just a goth) and get a glimpse of glaring red eyes staring at me in the mirrored ebony reflection of his sunglasses. Fuckin' wizards! Putting the evil eye on an honest working girl. That's ok. I got this. I know I got this, because I spot who I'm lookin' for at her usual table right up front. I plop myself down in it uninvited and put the plate of fried pork fat in front of her. The old lady gives me a filthy, broken-toothed grin.  "Annie Greengums," I say. "How's the Hag of the Hudson this fine night? Y'know, that's a real nice skin-suit you got on. Care for a bit of crunchy protein?" This bit of pleasntness out of the way, I start right in: Annie is a proper monster, a doyenne of the old school, and respects bluntness and honesty and carb-free snacks. "I got a problem that you might be able to solve." quote:Hit the Streets: rolling +Tribunal looking for a hexbreaker Old Kentucky Shark fucked around with this message at 23:26 on Nov 29, 2017 |
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Nov 29, 2017 00:20
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| # ¿ Apr 24, 2024 09:39 |
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Blood -1, Heart 2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 0/5 I push the blood-spattered pork rinds towards the hag and scoot my seat a little further from the ring. Hnnnh. Food for thought. The Hag O' the Hudson's been around as long as it's been called the Hudson, if not longer. She's solid. Pillar of the community, or would be if we fae had pillars or communities. I mean, yeah, she eats humans and wears their skin to walk the night, but only if they're already drownin' in her river. That's basically ethical, right? All you gotta do to avoid the Hag's wrath is stay out of the fuckin' river. Anyway, I've worked for her before, and tit for tat's what I came here to get. I could formalize the deal -- nail down all the details and curlicues. That's what I'd do if she were one of those wriggly Summer or Winter bastards. But with someone like the Hag, that'd be a bit insultin'. Of course, so would just blindly agreein' sight unseen, like a blind chump or a human. I'll be sneaky. She understands sneaky. I grin: you can't help grinnin' in the presence of Annie Greengums, if only to make sure you still got yer teeth after seein' her horror show of a mouth. "Well, Annie, I'd like to help you find your thing, buuuuuut, I ain't sure I'd be much help right now. See, this bastard of a wizard put the evil eye on me, and he's been spying on me all night. Y'know what perverts those wizards are. So as it is, it's all I can do to hide in neutral territory and hope it goes away. I was going to ask you if you could do anything about it, since you're the most powerful hag in the city. If you could see clear to gettin' rid of the 'fluence first, I might be able to find what you're lookin' for...." I trail off meaningfully. quote:Persuade an npc
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Dec 4, 2017 03:45
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Blood -1, Heart 2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 0/5 I lick my lips. A twenty four hour advance payment? That's better than I'd hoped for. There's a barb in this deal, but I can worry about it tomorrow. I glance over at the Troll -- Yeah, Kazco, I recognize -- is that Maayo? Dumbass normie's going to get himself murdered! Oh poo poo, but if I save him, he'll have to help me -- then I turn back to the hag. " reach for the cup. "Two questions: An infestation of what, and does this protection protect from all seeking magic? Like, what's the limitations I have to work with here?"
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Dec 15, 2017 23:30
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Blood -1, Heart 2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 0/5 Hey! Free pouch! I scoop it up. You can never have enough pouches. I respect the old lady's getting the last word in. That's always important, in these type of things. Respect. I bounce the pouch in my hand while I scan the room. Bugs, huh? I like bugs. I mean, they're basically mobile trash, right? Falls well within my purview: I'm basically bug royalty, if you think about it. I can prob'ly get 'em to bow and scrape, no trouble. Easy money. I stow the pouch and sidle up to Maayo and Kazco. The big troll's got his fist raised, so I go ahead and bounce knuckles. "'Sup, Kazco. 'Sup, Maayo." I put my arm around Maayo's shoulder, interposing myself between him and the giant sack of violence. "What a surprise ta see you two here. Didn't think you even knew about this place, Maayo." Turning to Kazco, I add, "so, I heard you got a little bug problem?" I grin. "Might be able to help with that."
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Dec 20, 2017 02:30
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Blood -1, Heart 2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 0/5 "So, just, like, regular bugs? Not giant man-eating bugs?" I ask. You gotta be specific, in this city. "Sure, okay. I'll go and check it out." "Wanna come, Maayo? You might get to see somethin' cool." Or get a chance to score some Redleaf. What are they gonna do, frisk me on my way out?
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Dec 24, 2017 19:55
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Blood -1, Heart 2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 0/5 It feels great to get out of that bloodsport. I yawn and stretch my arms in the cozily dank underground passages. This is what makes New York such a great place to live; you can get everywhere you want to go without ever traveling above ground. That's a pretty neat trick, considering it's partly island! As we move through the underground passages, I start seeing signs of abandoned squats. You always get squatters in the underneath, especially in winter; free space and heat. Back in the old days, according to Dad, there was a whole underground vagrant civilization under the streets, with its own language, architecture, "street" signs, and community. They used to put on plays and brew moonshine. But like a lot of things, it's gone downhill. There's still little flashes of brightness, though. Above one pile of what looks like abandoned laundry, I recognize a few chalked markings; real-deal hobo sign! There's an angel with a hand that means free food, the spiked mouth that means biting animal, and the circle with six lines that means Cockroach King. It's a prayer, which is to say, an open-ended bargain, asking for safety and succor. I take out my phone and snap a picture of it, to show the King later. Then I check the laundry to see if they left an offering. Score! A bag of peanuts, and an unmarked bottle of booze! Good offering, dude. Proper respect. I rip open the bag and start crunching the shells between my teeth. "Want some?" I offer to Maayo. "Free food is best food." When we get to the pump room, I run my thumb down the damp wall and lick it. Sulfides, rock sweat, and that cobalt dye they add to marine gas. "We're near the river," I tell Maayo smugly, tryin' to look all Legolas and poo poo. I put my hand on the door. "Ready?" I ask him. "There might be bugs as big as rats and rats as big as dogs, if they've been getting into the Redleaf. You sure you're up to this poo poo?"
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Jan 10, 2018 03:15
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Blood -1, Heart 2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 0/5 Tiny pigs? Rat-pigs? Noice! Never seen that before. That may be a first, even for the New York Underground. I wonder if a wizard did it? I wonder, briefly, if my landlord would let me keep one for a pet. Prolly not. Fuckin' Ukrainian bastard. "Think fast!" I shout to Maayo, and then I grab the bag of peanuts and sling them underhanded, scattering nuts and shells away from myself and across the other side of the room. Hopefully, the pig rats are hungry for something other than adorable fae-flesh and reasonably attractive human. "Keep them off my back. I've got to work some magic." I start humming the strains of an ancient magic song to pacify animals under my breath. quote:@Fernweh (OKShark): 2d6+0 Distract the rat-boar-pigs = (1+3)+0 = 4 The rat-boar-pigs don't even seem to notice the hobo offering. Dang.
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Jan 17, 2018 01:42
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Blood -1, Heart 2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 1/5 Okay. I didn't want to do this. This is not only real-deal fae magic, but something in the neighborhood of an ancient family secret. It is absolutely not the kind of thing you do in front of outsiders. But what the hell, right? I don't see any other way past these things. I toss the pouch to Maayo. "Get ready to bury it," I murmur. "I'm going to be... busy." Then, while hundreds of glittering black eyes focus on me, I slide a hand into my pocket. They bristle and chitter, as if they can understand that I'm reaching for a weapon. When my hand comes out a moment later holding a cell phone, they don't seem any more relaxed. In full view of the rats, I hold it aloft. Then, on its black glass surface, i draw the sigil of Hamelin, the universal calling rune for all rats and vermin. They can't not pay attention to me now. "I the name of the blood we share, I call you. In the name of my father, I command you. In the name of the King, I bid you answer." Still making the sign, I raise my finger and touch the play button burning on the phone's screen. "In the name of the Cockroach King and the King... of Pop." A tinny, driving bass beat fills the air, boosted on the wings of weird street magic. It enters the boar-rats ears, bypassing their tiny brains and heading directly to their spinal columns. Their noses and legs start twitching as they rise up en masse. I cock an imaginary hat on my head and swivel my heels, showing them the steps. One of the many dark secrets of the Cockroach King is his deep and abiding love of elaborate, choreographed dance numbers. Why? Who knows. If you were ten thousand years old, you'd have weird hobbies too. It infects his children, and his children's children, unto the billionth generation. The semi-rats here can no more fail to answer now than they could to the first Pied Piper. And gently caress you if Michael ain't better than any old German rat-catcher. "Hurry," I tell Maayo. "You have until the song ends. And don't try to film this!" I warn him as I walk backwards in place. Marking Corruption to use Bedlam. Instilling in the boar-rats the emotion of Love of Dance. Or, if you prefer, I make them feel Footloose. Old Kentucky Shark fucked around with this message at 05:01 on Jan 22, 2018 |
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Jan 22, 2018 04:56
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Blood -1, Heart 2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 1/5 "I don't know," I shout to Maayo, as I swipe the right leg in, seven, eight. One, that's a chase, right, left, one. Tap the (invisible) hat real quick, and two. "Is it glowing? If it isn't glowing, try bleeding on it." Swoop the right foot, seven, eight, pose, one. "Mortal blood is basically magic kerosene." Right, left, kick. "Listen, this is harder than it looks. Figure it out."
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Jan 25, 2018 23:27
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Blood -1, Heart 2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 2/5 Y'know, I really didn't want to do this. Killin', i mean. I mean, these things are vermin, my dad's vermin, I'm vermin... it's basically letting down the fuckin' side. But my word is my bond, right? Right. "Get your feet off the floor," I yell to Maayo, as the song nears its finale. "poo poo's about to get rekt." Then I do it. The ultimate lure. The thing you gotta be a faerie or have special shoes to do; the Antigravity Lean. I lean in hard, swaying back from the doorway at an improbable angle, sending out my magic to draw them in towards the ritual. @Fernweh (OKShark): 2d6 Letting It (the Rhythm) Out = (4+5) = 9
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Feb 1, 2018 01:15
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Blood -1, Heart 2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 2/5 I return myself to vertical with the power of cool. Nice! Physics is for fools and mortals. Speaking of which... I go over and offer Maayo a hand up. Silly human, always getting hurt. Speaking of which, I get back a bloody hand for my trouble. While I'm idly licking his blood off my hand, I ponder whether I should heal him. I mean, I cooooooould, but... Oh, hey. Kazco's calling. But I never gave him my number, because he's kind of a douche. How's he calling? Has he been tracking me? Did he hack my phone? Did he use magic to set this up as an elaborate trap? Has he secretly been plotting revenge for years? Or did he just ask any of my, like, hundreds of friends around town what my number was? Yeah, probably that one. "'Sup, Kaz," I say. "Your problem is totally one hundred percent solved thus legally and permanently negating all possible debts between us. Garbage fae; they get the job done! Anyway, while I'd like to accept your copious gratitude in person, me and the human sidekick are going out for celebratory ramen."
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Feb 14, 2018 01:06
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Blood -1, Heart 2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 2/5 drat it, Kazco, I think, as I hastily shove fistfuls of Redleaf into my pockets and also anything else of value that's not nailed down. Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal! Actually, nah. I'm not mad. That's what I get for not nailing down the wording of my agreement with the Hag. Next time I help Kaz or his buddies, though, it's gonna cost extra. "Don't come in!" I shout out the door. "This whole place is full of monsters! And... and poison. Totes dangerous to mortals-poison!" I start looking around for a grate or pipe. "Hold 'em off for a minute," I tell Maayo. "And I'll see if i can find a way out of here." quote:
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Feb 25, 2018 16:46
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Blood -1, Heart 2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 2/5 Okay. Okay. I can get out of this. I just need to think. All cops is assholes and wizard cops is double assholes but they have one thing in common which is that they're all super overconfident. All I have to do is wait until their guard is down and I'll-- I hear the gunshot and hit the floor. I ain't bulletproof, and wizards would come armed with cold iron. Only, when I look around, I can see that they aren't shooting at anyone in this room. The hell? "I don't even have a weapon!" I shout. "This is bullshit! I didn't hurt any of you or steal anything from you on this occasion!" And then I hear the voice. Dad's voice. Oh, poo poo. Oh poo poo oh poo poo oh poo poo. What's he doing here? I mean, he can go whither he whilst, 'cause he's a loving sovereign of the earth, but what's he doing here, specific-like? And then I remember the prayer outside, in hobo-sign, and the offering. And then tweedle-dee and tweedle-dum out there invoked my name. Not my full name, of course, but my human one, in underground halls sanctified to the name of the Unclean Court. poo poo. That's half a Communion ritual right there. Get me a tarnished mirror and a chunk of talc and we can have a loving face-time call. Huh. So. If Dad's close enough to this place to hear and be heard by mortals, that means we're all close enough to him to... I plunge my fingers into the redleaf-laden soil and reach out. The Court of the Cockroach King is always close when you're underground in this city. I can feel and taste it, just beyond my reach. If I were alone, I could find a grate and spend a few minutes and pop home for tea and crusty bread within the hour. But with all these humans here -- and I'm not abandoning Maayo -- it's going to take an effort... I pull and pull, trying to flip me and Maayo to the Unclean Court. And then I feel something give way, but it's not -- it's not -- it's not what I wanted to give. quote:
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Mar 7, 2018 02:18
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Blood -1, Heart +2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 2/5 I look around, taking a deep breath. That's weird; it normally smells much more like garbage. I take out my zippo and flick the light on; my phone's got a light, but phones don't always work so good on the other side. In the flickering fire I see dark and tunnels and dark and flooring and dark. And I got real loving good night vision, so that means it's hella dark. Magical dark. "Oh poo poo," I say. "I'm in Stranger Things! I loving told Kifune that poo poo was real!" I look around some more. "He owes me a coke." I poke the wall; it feels cold. Colder than the subway walls usually feel, which is actually pretty warm. Earth's good insulation. I bend over and sniff the floor. It smells like the Unclean Court, but real faint, and old. I listen. I can hear the distant sounds of trickling water. I squat down on my haunches and look at my lighter. Then I turn it off and close my eyes. If I was a human in this situation, I'd be hosed, but I'm not. I'm a garbage-fae. I'm the youngest unbegotten daughter of the King of Filth, with all the powers and privileges that entails. I got the trash-kenning and the deep-downing, I can tell you the value of a pile of junk at a glance and I never get lost on city streets and I always know where to find the best food and clubs and drugs. I take ten minutes to orient myself, and then I start looking for a way out. It's above me, somewhere. I can feel the tunnels ahead and behind, and they feel both familiar and wrong. It's like an upside down mirror copy of the real New York Underground. But whatever this place is, my dad's still the king of it, and that means I don't gotta take its poo poo. "Dad!" I shout down the hallway. I start walking, looking for a path. "Dad! Can you hear me?" If I can get close enough, he'll be able to respond. All I got to do is keep moving. Then a thought strikes me. "Demigorgon? Are you loving real too? If so, let's parley." quote:SidekickBOT - Today at 5:05 PM
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Mar 15, 2018 22:16
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Blood -1, Heart +2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 0/5 Corruption 2/5 Holy poo poo, it's real. I was joking. At least it doesn't seem hostile. I clear my throat. "Well, thanks, Demigorgon-guy. You did a real good job of making the way... clearer. And fiery-er." I look from the sludge-fall to the fire. My natural instinct is to go through the sludge, because I'm garbage-fae and that poo poo doesn't bother me. But maybe that's exactly what the creepy millenial StayPuft update wants me to think... On the other hand, fire: bad. I look from one path to the other, debating. But that's getting me nowhere, fast, and I have an inkling that this place is basically the Unclean Court's metastisized double-cancer and sticking around here longer than I have to is probably bad for my health. gently caress it. I reach into my pants pocket and pull out a subway token. It's a vintage '79 Diamond Jubilee, one of Dad's best. I flip it in the air, catch it, and slap it down on my hand. Then I peek. "Fire it is." I'm already running as I pocket the token, and then I'm into the flame. "This was a terrible idea!" quote:SidekickBOT - @Fernweh (OKShark): 2d6+1 Escaping the Shadow Courts = (3+1)+1 = 5
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Mar 24, 2018 03:14
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Blood -1, Heart +2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 1(a)/5 Corruption 2/5 I ooze out of a hole in the wall into the Unclean court. Home sweet home! I'd recognize that smell of mildew, hot pepper, and burnt coffee grounds anywhere. Y'know, people get the UC wrong by imagining it as this gross, smelly, cramped, wet hole in the ground. Truth is, it's actually quite dry and spacious. We've got tunnels of every size, from crawl-ways lit by dangling christmas tree lights to subway tunnels lit by 20,000 lumen tripod lights looted from city construction sites. As for the smell; well, it's no worse than the rest of the city. If you want clean air, move to flyover country. As I bask in the familiar glow, I take stock of my situation. Sure, I'm burnt up. Also, I've got a voice in my head. Also also, I think maybe dad's realm has an undiagnosed cancer. On the bright side, I'm alive, I solved my wizard problem for the moment, and I've got two pockets full of stolen Redleaf. Could be worse! I wonder if the humie made it out okay? Probably. Wizards don't hurt their own kind, much. "Hey, Dad!" I call out into the empty realm. "I'm back! You'll never guess where I've been."
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Mar 26, 2018 23:19
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Blood -1, Heart +2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 1(a)/5 Corruption 2/5 "Hey, King! Hey, Maayo! Good to see you made it. I'll show you around my home in a minute. And I didn't steal nuthin' from the wizards. I just got in and out of the tower." And then i tell the Cockroach King everything that happened, down to the last detail of the dance and the fact that I owe the Demogorgon, because he is my liege as well as my Dad and respect is a stream that flows both ways. Once I've done that, I show Maayo around the Unclean Court, stopping to get some painkillers and booze, which you should definitely always mix. Man, burns suck. My arm's all gross and crispy and poo poo, and it's not healing properly. It's still pretty cajun the next day, which I spend around the weirder sections of Brighton trying to offload the Redleaf I got from Kazco, because I might as well get some profit or favors off of the deal.
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Apr 13, 2018 23:04
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| # ¿ Apr 24, 2024 09:39 |
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Blood -1, Heart +2, Mind 0, Spirit +1 Tribunal +1 Lighthouse -1 Queensguard +1 Brighton +1 Harm 1(a)/5 Corruption 2/5 So, Brighton ends up being a bust. Turns out, drug dealers really hate it when you try to sell them back their own drugs on their own territory. Who knew? Kazco recognizes me on the first loving day and I end up skipping out by diving down a storm drain. Garbage fae are hard to catch, motherfucker! Too bad about the redleaf. Oh well; easy come, easy go. That's how I ended up with a lot of free time on my hands. I was hanging out in the underground, banging off the walls, annoying Dad, and just generally trying to avoid having to deal with any of the people who want me dead. It was going so well that i was already trying to stage my second rendition of the opening from the Lion King using cockroaches as actors when Dad bumbled up, in his holy bath-robes, and delivered the invitation, as well as the official request from the wizard cops to interview me. gently caress. The Cockroach King gave me a very stern, very long-suffering look, and told me I should talk to them before things escalated any further. When i told him that I wasn't talking to cops until either he hired a lawyer or I started looking Caucasian, he reminded me that I do know a lawyer. Which is true, in the biblical sense.  Addington is a sin-eater, a kind of undead carrion-spirit that eats unsanctified corpses. I don't know why, it's an Irish folklore thing. She moved here from Philly a few decades back, and we used to date last year. Yeah, I went through a undead man-eating goth phase. Whatevs. Sue me. Anyway, she's a criminal lawyer, and also a criminal lawyer, and not something to be hosed with lightly if you are of the edible persuasion. So, basically perfect, except for the part where she's still mad about the whole... you know, it's a long story. Water under the bridge. I've forgotten about it. Hope she has too. And I guess she has, because I only have to turn on the charm a little bit before she agrees to go with me to the meeting with the Wiz-cops and represent me, on one condition; I have to take her to the other meeting. Which she already knew about before I told her. And she already knew who was going to be there. And she seems real eager to meet someone. So that's weird. But at least it won't be boring!
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Apr 20, 2018 23:15
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