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poty
Jun 21, 2008

虹はどこで終わるのですか? あなたの魂の中で、または地平線で?
i would guess messengers get paid a mostly flat fee per shipment so by entering easy orders for small light items youre actually helping them a lot. what a kind-hearted person

its a crispmas miracle

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MrMoo
Sep 14, 2000

Jimmy Carter posted:

this is with me ordering rush delivery to an Amazon Locker

In NY and CT most deliveries are next day due to the NJ warehouse, but Locker deliveries take an extra day :shrug:

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
Slippery Tilde
they opened up an amazon locker storefront in downtown san jose and it has a couch area w/ a big tv and 4 xbox controllers

wide stance
Jan 28, 2011

If there's more than one way to do a job, and one of those ways will result in disaster, then he will do it that way.

Stereotype posted:

Some stuff they inexplicably get to you in no time at all, but most stuff takes forever. For example I ordered a book for a Christmas present on Monday and it got here today, but I ordered some slippers two weeks ago and they haven't shipped yet. Both are "Fulfilled by Amazon.com"

You're on an island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean get real pal.

Schadenboner
Aug 15, 2011

by Shine

Stereotype posted:

Some stuff they inexplicably get to you in no time at all, but most stuff takes forever. For example I ordered a book for a Christmas present on Monday and it got here today, but I ordered some slippers two weeks ago and they haven't shipped yet. Both are "Fulfilled by Amazon.com"

A lot of "Fulfilled by Amazon.com" shops are small one-location businesses who ship from a single location. Like, Downtown Books in Milwaukee (Broadway between Wisconsin and Michigan, near Johnson Controls or the Grain Exchange, also by an ownage soup place*) is a "Fulfilled by Amazon.com" place, at least it used to be?

Also:

wide stance posted:

You're on an island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean get real pal.

*: Their desserts are/were a bit poo poo though.

Schadenboner fucked around with this message at 16:54 on Nov 30, 2017

Shaggar
Apr 26, 2006

Stereotype posted:

Some stuff they inexplicably get to you in no time at all, but most stuff takes forever. For example I ordered a book for a Christmas present on Monday and it got here today, but I ordered some slippers two weeks ago and they haven't shipped yet. Both are "Fulfilled by Amazon.com"

I would guess its unlikely they have the warehouse space in Hawaii that they do in the continental us.

The Management
Jan 2, 2010

sup, bitch?
for books in particular amazon is just a front end to your local book store. they are part of the fulfilled by amazon network.

speaking of, I was going to buy a book. I don’t have prime so the amazon price plus shipping ends up being the same as it would be at my local book store. so I decided to go buy it there and get it that day. thus far I haven’t made it to the book store all week and my package would have been here by now if I ordered it.

The Management
Jan 2, 2010

sup, bitch?
oh and amazon definitely delays your non-2 day orders if they would arrive faster.

Shaggar
Apr 26, 2006
if ur gonna buy a book idk why in the world you'd get a physical copy instead of just getting it on kindle

Jimmy Carter
Nov 3, 2005

THIS MOTHERDUCKER
FLIES IN STYLE

Amazon will now let you expense a $250 Intel Compute Stick with a camera taped to it so that you can gently caress around with machine vision at work for half a week and then never use it again

Jimmy Carter fucked around with this message at 16:40 on Nov 30, 2017

post hole digger
Mar 21, 2011

vaginal facsimile posted:

Amazon Web poo poo

when its other peoples aws, its amazon web poo poo, when its your aws, its amazon web stuff :D :D :D

PIZZA.BAT
Nov 12, 2016


:cheers:


we need a Bezos’ Bad Bitches gang tag

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
Slippery Tilde

Shaggar posted:

if ur gonna buy a book idk why in the world you'd get a physical copy instead of just getting it on kindle

comic architectural photography books suck on a screen

Shaggar
Apr 26, 2006
sure. e-ink isn't for picture books

Comfy Fleece Sweater
Apr 2, 2013

You see, but you do not observe.

hi I’m Jeff bozo

here’s a kindle, I’m not gonna update poo poo about it for 5 years

here is the new one, it’s waterproof and now costs 5x as much, it’s premium

see ya bitches, I’m off to space

*laughs, Jeff Bezos-ly*

Shaggar
Apr 26, 2006
my kindle paperwhite is so good.

Schadenboner
Aug 15, 2011

by Shine

Comfy Fleece Sweater posted:

hi I’m Jeff bozo

here’s a kindle, I’m not gonna update poo poo about it for 5 years

here is the new one, it’s waterproof and now costs 5x as much, it’s premium

see ya bitches, I’m off to space

*laughs, Jeff Bezos-ly*

Look, suburban wives who want to :shlick: in the bathtub is a valuable market, ok?

:mad:

qirex
Feb 15, 2001

Comfy Fleece Sweater posted:

hi I’m Jeff bozo

here’s a kindle, I’m not gonna update poo poo about it for 5 years

here is the new one, it’s waterproof and now costs 5x as much, it’s premium

see ya bitches, I’m off to space

*laughs, Jeff Bezos-ly*

even if you buy the $250 one you still have to spend an extra $20 to not get ads on it

HAIL eSATA-n
Apr 7, 2007


Shaggar posted:

my kindle paperwhite is so good.

same

definitely a one-time thing though cause the rest of their hardware is garbage

HAIL eSATA-n
Apr 7, 2007


qirex posted:

even if you buy the $250 one you still have to spend an extra $20 to not get ads on it

if you live in the US you can just contact support and say you live in canada now and they'll press the no-ads button

DELETE CASCADE
Oct 25, 2017

i haven't washed my penis since i jerked it to a phtotograph of george w. bush in 2003

Shaggar posted:

if ur gonna buy a book idk why in the world you'd get a physical copy instead of just getting it on kindle

if you have a physical book you can put it on a shelf after you're done reading it and then everyone knows you're a smarty pants who read that book

qirex
Feb 15, 2001

if you own a physical book you'll never get an email that says "due to some stupid license fight between megacorporations your book will instantly turn to dust on jan 1"

been thinking of getting an ereader for library access, are any of the non-kindle ones any good?

Shaggar
Apr 26, 2006
if somehow amazon pulped one of my ebooks I bought i'll just pirate it.

poty
Jun 21, 2008

虹はどこで終わるのですか? あなたの魂の中で、または地平線で?

DELETE CASCADE posted:

if you have a physical book you can put it on a shelf after you're done reading it and then everyone knows you're a smarty pants who read that book

great now i need to buy a shelf

Shaggar
Apr 26, 2006
you could pretend its star trak and get a bunch of kindles for your shelf each with only one book on it.

flakeloaf
Feb 26, 2003

Still better than android clock

qirex posted:

if you own a physical book you'll never get an email that says "due to some stupid license fight between megacorporations your book will instantly turn to dust on jan 1"

been thinking of getting an ereader for library access, are any of the non-kindle ones any good?

mrs loaf is rather fond of her kobo touch

Schadenboner posted:

Look, suburban wives who want to :shlick: in the bathtub is a valuable market, ok?

not that fond i don't think

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
Slippery Tilde
loafwife

The Management
Jan 2, 2010

sup, bitch?
I just like reading an actual book

PIZZA.BAT
Nov 12, 2016


:cheers:


Comfy Fleece Sweater posted:

hi I’m Jeff bozo

here’s a kindle, I’m not gonna update poo poo about it for 5 years

here is the new one, it’s waterproof and now costs 5x as much, it’s premium

see ya bitches, I’m off to space

*laughs, Jeff Bezos-ly*

:worship:

FamDav
Mar 29, 2008

Comfy Fleece Sweater posted:

*laughs, Jeff Bezos-ly*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ItvFSS1OmVo

Michael Transactions
Nov 11, 2013

The Management posted:

oh and amazon definitely delays your non-2 day orders if they would arrive faster.

Wtf...

Michael Transactions
Nov 11, 2013

Shaggar posted:

my kindle paperwhite is so good.

I'm gonna whipe my rear end on it bird brain

My Linux Rig
Mar 27, 2010
Probation
Can't post for 6 years!

flakeloaf posted:

let me pay 60 dollars a year so a shady courier can throw someone else's package at my house from the window of a moving car on his way up the street, take a smartphone photo of it on my porch on his way back down the street, and sign his name on a delivery receipt in my name

i'd take actual delivery via regular mail "probably by the end of this week" over next-day whatever the gently caress that is

lol if you don’t have an amazon hub

Bored Online
May 25, 2009

We don't need Rome telling us what to do.

My Linux Rig posted:

lol if you don’t have an amazon hub

your logistics solution is a piece of poo poo

Gazpacho
Jun 18, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
Slippery Tilde

Schadenboner posted:

A lot of "Fulfilled by Amazon.com" shops are small one-location businesses who ship from a single location. Like, Downtown Books in Milwaukee (Broadway between Wisconsin and Michigan, near Johnson Controls or the Grain Exchange, also by an ownage soup place*) is a "Fulfilled by Amazon.com" place, at least it used to be?
this isn't correct. FBA shipments go out of Amazon warehouses. Marketplace is the direct vendor program

Chumbawumba4ever97
Dec 31, 2000

by Fluffdaddy
the kindle DX was the greatest thing ever made and amazon are insane for not trying another 9" kindle w/ paperwhite

also am I supposed to tip these delivery drivers at christmas; I never see them. I am guessing it's a different person every day? either because the routes are switched up or the turnover rate is ridiculous because they make a third of what UPS and USPS employees make

Notorious b.s.d.
Jan 25, 2003

by Reene

Uncle at Nintendo posted:

the kindle DX was the greatest thing ever made and amazon are insane for not trying another 9" kindle w/ paperwhite

i had two DXs, i loved them, but i can see why they didn't pursue it

they were very expensive, the screens were slower than the smaller units, they were heavy as gently caress, and almost impossible to use onehanded. there was just no market

Gazpacho
Jun 18, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
Slippery Tilde
http://www.miamiherald.com/news/nation-world/national/article187717973.html

TOOT BOOT
May 25, 2010

qirex posted:

if you own a physical book you'll never get an email that says "due to some stupid license fight between megacorporations your book will instantly turn to dust on jan 1"

Amazon is better than iTunes about this. There's never been a situation where I couldn't read a Kindle ebook but I've had multiple albums removed from download access by iTunes, either in whole or part.

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Chumbawumba4ever97
Dec 31, 2000

by Fluffdaddy

And when a supervisor for the delivery person arrived at his house, Bautista said he wasn’t prepared for the stinky package.

“He was in shock when we saw the size of ‘it’,” Bautista told ABC10.

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