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William Henry Hairytaint posted:Why does the red headed anime golem have a fang? Half-vampire.
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Dec 5, 2017 01:48
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Bogus Adventure posted:This is the best analogy for the Star Citizen scam/phenomenon (scamomenon?) I've seen so far. I see the parallels (losers paying for a fantasy that won't happen), but, in the end, that's unfair to titty streamers. They deliver exactly what they promise: videos of a woman with breasts who plays videogames. The product exists.
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Dec 7, 2017 06:44
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big nipples big life posted:Here's the next one If they actually make this game, it's going to suck. Not because there'll be griefers, but because this whole idea of "a true Sandbox MMO!" counts on an active community full of people eager and willing to just flat out have way less fun with the game than others. Who really wants to be the goddamn village baker, huh? Who wants to be one of the little people who make up the support structure? You'll find some, sure. Enough to actually support all the would-be dragonslayers and bandits and assassins and King Arthurs and King Arthases who'll be running around? No. The only half-way popular non-combat support role will be prostitution.
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Dec 7, 2017 18:54
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Wait. I change my mind about Elyria. http://chroniclesofelyria.com/game/lore-religion posted:According to the Qindred, in the beginning there was just the one. Her name was Angelica. Angelica was alone in the vast emptiness and so she brought light into the world so she would feel warmth and see color. At the moment she created the Light, the cosmos spread out around her, expanding, filling the world with hundreds of billions of spiral and elliptical light sources, each themselves filled with hundreds of billions of lights. I want to worship the dark goddess who is mad that she didn't get any cosmic twin sister incest.
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Dec 7, 2017 19:13
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Bogus Adventure posted:That sounds about right. I remember reading about it when it first came out because I loved Star Wars, but the concept sounded like garbage. They needed people to be entertainers, run shops, and other poo poo. IIRC, being a Jedi was random and hard as gently caress. When they revamped it, they culled a lot of the classes and let anyone be Jedi. They tried to reward the original Jedi who jumped through all of the hoops, but I think it still pissed people off. This thing promises that wizards will be super-rare, too. Only 5% of the players. And yeah, people have lots of positive things to say about Star Wars Galaxies. But check this: quote:In the United States, Star Wars Galaxies: An Empire Divided sold 370,000 copies ($16.1 million) by August 2006, after its release in June 2003. It was the country's 43rd best-selling computer game between January 2000 and August 2006. Combined sales of all Star Wars Galaxies-related games released between January 2000 and August 2006 had reached 720,000 units in the United States by the latter date. That was considered good in those days, because, well, it's an MMO, what kind of MMO sells as well as a regular game? It was never that big, and the only reason they tried to make it more WoW-like was because it was constantly leaking subscribers and never getting more. Problem was, they tried to fix a sinking boat and cracked it in two instead. There's this group of people who really, really want to play/make a Full Sandbox MMO Where The Players Make All The Rules, and they've got a strong online presence. But I don't think there's enough of them to make a big game like this a success. And I'm not sure they're all that interested in being the game's underappreciated working class. Blurry Gray Thing fucked around with this message at 04:18 on Dec 8, 2017 |
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Dec 8, 2017 04:16
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Meme Emulator posted:Have you ever heard of a game called Foxhole? No. I haven't. "Have you ever heard of [really obscure niche game]? It's really popular with its obscure niche!" is not a good argument against 'There really aren't that many people who want to play a game where they're a nobody who does menial labor while a select few people get to be the big heroes'. And who is going to be playing the Foxhole Trucker day in, day out, non-stop, for years on end? Because that's what makes a healthy MMO. Not someone logging in for maybe week, having fun "being boring", and then moving on to another game. You need someone who keeps playing for years at a time. This sort of gameplay is something people will do for a lark. It's not something they come back to, over and over. Blurry Gray Thing fucked around with this message at 01:18 on Dec 9, 2017 |
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Dec 9, 2017 01:16
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The ship is a trap. I know it is. An unarmed cargo vessel, just sitting idle, engines and shields powered down. A juicy prize. Too juicy. Too tempting, too obvious, too many lifesigns aboard. Crew think it's a slaver. I think that's just what the Space Fleet wants us to think. If it was up to me, I'd blow it to bits and watch all those elite space marines tumble through space. How do you like your ambush now, assholes? But it's not up to me. We've been too long without prey. Too long without pay. I'm losing control of the crew. I tried to remind them that boarding a ship that looked easy is how Blackbeard got killed. Girlbrushlol just called me "Captain Nerdlinger". First Mate WeedReaver stood by and said nothing while the crew laughed. That's not like him. He's the one who first pegged her as a discipline problem, but lately, they've been spending a whole lot of time together. I can feel the power dynamics shifting all around me. If I don't give these people a win, and soon, they'll find someone else for the job. I lead the charge. I have to. Girlbrushlol is good with a nano-cutlass, but I'm better, and it's high time I reminded them. If I was a proper bastard, I'd send the troublemakers first, then pull out, but that's not me. For all their faults, I know I'll never find a finer crew, or even another crew that match my play schedule. If we win, I'll have them back. The boarding hatch cuts into the upper crew quarters, not the hold like they'd expect. I won't make this easy, you bastards! If I can take the bridge, I can take the internal defense systems... But what defense systems? The corridors are empty. No gun turrets. No blast doors. I burst into the bridge. The pilot is a nude woman, all her sliders set to max. She /surrenders before I can fire a shot. And she turns on a two-way feed to the cargo hold. So many people. Why are they naked? Private messages bombard me: StimpireSlave13, SubbyFuta2, PirateBoody, SlaveGirl4Uuu, Tak3m3baby, CatgirlInChains. So many others... The ship is a trap. Blurry Gray Thing fucked around with this message at 11:34 on Feb 15, 2018 |
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Feb 15, 2018 11:30
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He must make sure the death of his parents is not in vain (he killed them and sold their organs to buy pretend spaceships).
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Mar 7, 2018 15:01
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I think I'm over Star Citizen. I went into that Star Citizen forum, and I'm all about Ashes of Creation now. Because Ashes of Creation isn't an accidental scam. It's being made by professional scam artists and hucksters with years of MLM experience, and they're all set to take these suckers by storm. They made a bunch of generic "perfect organic sandbox mmo" promises in-development MMOs have been making for decades. They released a goddamn nonsensical "64 possible class/subclass combinations!" grid that only looks like a good idea to someone who never played an MMO and dealt with class balance problems (standout names: Tellsword - yes, Tell, not spell, Spellmancer, Nightspell). They said they're going to do it all with the Unreal engine and SOMEHOW make it work for an MMO. But somehow, people are still eating it up. This is the horse to watch. Star Citizen isn't planning to take the money and run. These guys are clearly going to.
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May 24, 2018 12:47
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Clocks posted:So am I setting fire to a pile of money when I see a movie or eat some food or have drinks with friends? Those are things that "exist" but are temporary experiences. On the one hand: movies (no more or less than a modern form of storytelling) and social activities. On the other hand: pressing a button to make your money go away for something that your brain thinks counts as a reward but really doesn't. Same things???
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May 29, 2018 02:53
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(also lol at defending a guy who screwed up his finances and marriage to buy some $80k audio system)
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Bacon Terrorist posted:I have no interest in space games but should this ever properly release I will buy a copy and kamikaze my noob ship into some true believer’s thousand dollar epeen. It won't hurt them, really, the thousand dollars comes with Ship Insurance. They get a new one if the old one blows up. ... I think that might be the real reason to buy ships, because if you actually earn it in-game, you don't get insurance? I mean you can't earn anything in-game right now, since there's no game, but in theory. But I have no idea, I'm probably wrong.
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Jul 14, 2018 12:59
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mercenarynuker posted:Everything in Shart Citizen looks new and shiny and clean. And then these schlubs post weirdo cosplay pics where they are wearing grubby clothes, weirdly jarring and probably anachronistic for the setting sneakers, and in general do NOT exude an aura of "clean, shiny, and new". The grubbiness isn't really part of the costume.
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Jul 19, 2018 15:37
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I think the Stimpire has some good ideas. Maybe people born on July 14th would be happier with a silver liquid instead of a skeleton.
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Nov 30, 2018 14:48
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Oh, come on, it can't be that blatant, maybe they're-quote:The Xi’An Empire located along the border of the Eastern Systems What the gently caress, their "Space" is laid out like a generic fantasy map??
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May 1, 2019 02:53
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*Flies towards the galactic north* *Turns up the thermostat, burr, it's cold up here!* *Dodges white, furry space worms, a stark contrast to the regular space worms you get further south* *Scanners detect incoming Space Vikings, red alert!*
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May 1, 2019 03:24
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Ghost Leviathan posted:To be honest all space games do that though, because making a 3D map is a colossal pain in the everything Laying out the galaxy so there's a galactic north/south/east/west is fine. That part's fine. But I am not really sure all space games put Magical Space-Asia in the East part of Space. Is the West the newly discovered Wild Frontier?
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May 1, 2019 13:54
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Forbes rips out the wall and shines a light on the roaches, but the roaches all blame this one spider they've been feuding with.
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May 5, 2019 04:03
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Have the Citizens destroyed Forbes yet??? Is Star Citizen selling Forbes Destroyers at 500 dollars a pop yet to help them do that?
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May 6, 2019 00:12
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I look on, terrified, as a vast armada of strange vessels pours forth from the dark beyond. They are my enemies, only and solely because we cannot understand them, and they cannot understand us. But this is one barrier we cannot overcome. They tell me I'm a goddamn idiot for blowing more and more money on pictures of spaceships, tanks, and motorcycles in a game that can't possibly be good if it ever even comes out. But I cannot understand their alien logic. Their thoughts move in strange, impossible ways that I cannot follow, just as they cannot follow mine. There can be no reconciliation between societies that are so different.
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May 22, 2019 05:12
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Fantastic Flyer posted:Wonder how the space slavers/rapists would react if they were the ones getting victimized Some might get upset. Most would just masturbate, same as the other way around.
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Jun 26, 2019 18:16
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Alan Smithee posted:*dusts off stimpire fanfic* The stimpire guy definitely dreams of getting his bones removed as the worst electricity caresses his balls. imo, it's not just something to do to others, he sees himself on both ends of the stim and loves every second of it. Even odds the weirdly specific date in it is his own birthday.
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Jun 27, 2019 06:26
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Fashionable Jorts posted:No Man's Sky will never not be a pile of poo poo, and I hate how people have essentially forgiven the game simply because they've added some new content to it. No Man's Sky proves there's a multiverse, because the people who made it are clearly from a place where Spore was a smash hit that deserved adoration and blatant imitation (but with a slight twist, like maybe a dab of Minecraft). They pretty much delivered what they promised and I just don't understand why anyone thought it would be good. Heck yeah, lets explore countless procedurally generated worlds that are all slightly different in ways that don't matter at all and are loving boring in all the ways that do.
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Jul 16, 2019 12:49
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Now, intelligent and mature is up in the air. But I bet he's very welcoming and inclusive. So inclusive he won't even let you leave after.
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Aug 13, 2019 05:26
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Rad-daddio posted:This. It's not about having fun, it's about lording power over people in a world where the whales have paid for that power. Star Citizen is good, because it keeps all of those "I want a VIRTUAL WORLD where SOME (me) have all the power and everyone else is THE MAID, THE JANITOR, THE PEASANT, OR WHATEVER, because it'll be THE BEST AND MOST IMMERSIVE GAME EVER!!!!" people in one place. So we pretty much stopped getting new games that keep promising they'll do that to try to pander to this really, really, really loud but small group that will never be satisfied with these games if they actually come out anyway (because it's a bad idea for a game).
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Aug 21, 2019 23:54
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I'm confused. Did they just invite a bunch of people to a real life event to talk all about this one ship? The idea is "400 year old Space-Company has big event to talk about their new spaceship", but they invited real people to a real bar to eat real food??? Is this an in-game event (for almost 300 dollars??) or a real thing that happened? Maybe Star Citizen was just a live-action roleplaying game all along.
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Aug 25, 2019 23:29
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Devils Affricate posted:Don't forget the horrid, unapologetic racists. Surprised he hasn't been recruited for White House staff yet. Chris Roberts can, should, and will be our first gamer president.
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Aug 26, 2019 22:40
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Fatkraken posted:It's basically that, and the explanation for why there are no girls in SC. Sometimes, I wonder how Ashes of Creation (the MMO being "made" by experienced MLM veterans) is progressing. It had a fantasy version of the same "Wow! So much! Living world! Be anything!!" sales pitch, but they also snuck in a bunch of MLM-style tricks (that they totally swear aren't MLM!) to reward people for plugging it on Twitch, and dragging their friends into playing it. Their class chart is still the funniest thing. Nobody who knows Games would think this was a good idea that would work in practice, it's pretty much just a pile of packing peanuts they can use to talk about how big and choice-filled it's going to be:  I'm kind of curious if they're taking off, or if they hadn't quite managed to use their regular scam skills to break into videogame scams. But I don't really have the energy to research poo poo like this myself.
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Aug 28, 2019 00:37
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The galaxy will always remember that time I killed Pulsarlegged John, son of Juan Starskull, the thirteen hundred and fifty sixth pirate king of the Western Sector. It feels amazing to have such a profound and permanent effect on the game. I hear there's a new pirate king already, but it's a very different guy. He doesn't even have a mustache.
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Sep 1, 2019 14:09
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autism ZX spectrum posted:If they bought out/licensed No Man's Sky, changed the color palette and put their own bespoke ship jpegs in the game (and maybe added a rape feature) would anyone know? Call it another alpha and keep the scam going with DLC and poo poo. People keep insisting that No Man's Sky "got really good!", so I don't think Star Citizen can afford them. Not after all the yachts and poo poo, or whatever they blew the cash on.
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Sep 3, 2019 05:16
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Devils Affricate posted:
In the year 2525, if Kickstarter's still alive, If Croberts can survive, they may fly
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Sep 14, 2019 11:08
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The opening line made me think this guy was trolling the SC reddit but nope he's actually fantasizing and apparently considers the year 20-loving-30 to be an acceptable release date for the feature complete game
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stinch posted:but they scammed the car off him. He might've lost a car, but he learned from the experience.
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Oct 18, 2019 12:55
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Saint Drogo posted:how do I get there? I smile at all the curious pilgrims and hold out a closed hand. "Get in," I whisper. They stare, still lost, still confused, still chained to the ground. I open my hand. There, in my palm, is my salvation. Their salvation. Our salvation. They look upon the exquisitely detailed, high fidelity tattoo of my 890 Jump. The light fills their eyes. "Get in," I whisper once more. They do.
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Oct 21, 2019 22:59
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MarcusSA posted:This tells a better picture. Why does it start at 61,014 and increase in increments of 50,417?
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Nov 30, 2019 12:05
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PHIZ KALIFA posted:you do not want to gently caress with Nana's Hummel Stimpire Figurines. Made of the worst porcelain.
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Jan 24, 2020 06:43
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IMO, it's the distant future. Everything is solved either with orbital bombardment, with super-advanced drones, or by just flying a spaceship to the spot and hovering perfectly still, as they obviously can do. The tanks fulfill the same role as sailboats do in modern times: a toy for the idle rich to roleplay like it's the olden days. The design reflects this.
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Jan 24, 2020 06:53
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HE CANNOT CANNOT USE STAR CITIZEN NOW HE HAS GONE DOWN THE STAIRS AND CLIPPED THROUGH THE WORLD
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Mar 22, 2020 12:29
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Phil Moscowitz posted:This is like parody of a parody, like CIG are laughing at people. It’s funny kind of but also just sad in a way. It is depressing to see yet another industry giant abandon their principles and start phoning it in. Cloud Imperium used to to be masters of bullshit stalling tactics. You'd get in-depth excuses and money-grabbing schemes, tailor-made for their fanbase. You could tell they knew their audience and really cared. Now it just seems like they're going through the motions, a shadow of their former self. It's like Blizzard all over again.
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Jul 31, 2020 02:57
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Ghost Leviathan posted:I pictured that a little too literally and thought this Free Willy sequel got dark Free Willy remake but it's about convincing a game whale to stop spending all his money on Star Citizen and enjoy the life that is, instead of the imaginary perfect space game that could be.
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Jul 31, 2020 07:11
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Bogus Adventure posted:It does have a single-player campaign where you switch between the New Republic and the Empire. It also has a lot of the energy management from X-Wing/TIE Fighter. It adds a lot of customization on ship loadout, too.  Why would anyone choose a TIE fighter when they can choose an Interceptor? The X-Wing vs. the A-Wing is a choice, sure. X-Wing's beefier and has more firepower. It's a good all-around fighter. A-Wing is faster and more agile. But the Interceptor is just plain better. And it should be better. They better not come up with some ol' bullshit to change this just for the sake of balance.
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Aug 1, 2020 22:31
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COMPAGNIE TOMMY posted:Why is there such epic diegetic music for just walking to the bar The Super Space Party Megacorp that owns the bar wants to awe and dazzle you. But the bartenders hate you and want you to leave. They can't just up and say so (Super Space Party Megacorp is recording them), so they do their job with malicious compliance. That's why they'll keep asking what you want, even if they can see you're still trying to drink the last thing you ordered. What do you want? You're still here, so you must want something. Just take your little drink and go. Keep the glass for all I care, just piss off. The sound reflects this mood.
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Aug 1, 2020 23:21
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