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Khomaniac
Dec 9, 2013

Buckle up because this gets weird. This is such a loving weird idea that I signed up to a bunch of forums dedicated to pretentious writing just to get their opinion and I barged into boards with topics like "romantic pre teen wizard romantic tension" and just bust in with "I either conducted the most brilliant psychological thought experiment of the new millenium or did something I am going to be really ashamed of". Like these are forums where home schooled children spend 100s of hours buttering up small time literary agents to have a shot at publishing their weird furry porn YA and I just busted in with, "I'M DOING THE GREATEST CHOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE THIS NATION HAS EVER SEEN"

Last Friday I looked at the news and read the headlines and thought, "How do these pieces of poo poo justify their actions to themselves? Are they complete sociopaths? Or insane?" I wondered what it would be like if I read their journals. Obviously I couldn't read their journals, so I just tried thinking like one and writing a journal. Most fun I've had writing in a long long time. I went for Trumps children, because the offspring of despots and the corrupt upper classes have been gibbering idiots throughout history. Freud based some of his theories on the Russian White Wolf Dream kid, etc. etc.
So what we have, is a rough compilation of sequential journal entries by the Trump children. This is a serialized release, like HP lovecraft pulp style. If the official poo poo coming out of the white house is "alternate history" anyways I figure I should be able to write a better one.

The three characters are:
D.J. (Donnie Junior): A man who, much like his father, views everyday as a dick measuring contest

Eric: A highly unstable mentally stunted man child with a dark secret

Ivanka: Seemingly somewhat normal, but has many repressed issues being born in a family who's maxim is "there are two kinds of people in the world, those who grab pussies and those who get grabbed"

So I started thinking like a sociopathic narcissist with no concept of reality and it was awesome. Most fun I've had writing in forever. The core theme is just Donald Trump is the most comically insecure man ever. Comically insecure.

It's a weird concept, I think it might be too out there. There is quite a bit of mood whiplash switching between the three. I tried to write it kind of in their mannerisms, Ivanka is prim and humorless, D.J. is pretty much this frat boy. It was an interesting thought experiment because it's like, "What if I was one of three people in the world who knew what reality is (whatever is defined by the revered father) and it was my job to enlighten everybody? So I just started viewing a bunch of situations through the eyes of people with the emotional intelligent of children and it might be too absurdist. Normally I shoot for a Terry Gilliam level of absurdism, but I feel like this might have pushed it too far.

Skip the rest of the exposition, and hit the first two links for examples of the entries.

I also feel like it may be too politically incendiary, even for me.

The plan is to release it in volumes, because it's exciting that way. No one knows where this is heading. The first installment is 50-60 pages and is about to drop soon, the character arcs are pretty out there.
Opinions? Apologies if I broke any rules, new here.

Here's some examples of the entries, one is D.J., frat bro extraordinaire. The other is Ivanka.

Anyways, I absolutely hate self promotion, super awkward promoting myself. I just feel like it's a lovely thing to do. I kind of don't want my name attached to this, hence the pen moniker. So I was hoping to gauge the thirst for, "yeah I think a multi volume saga narrated by three depraved sociopaths with no concern for reality is great", which is lovely, but I really couldn't think of a better way to gauge opinion. It's kind of like a choose your own adventure for the whole nation.

So here are links mentioned in that lengthy and somewhat nonsensical narrative. Examples of the content, promotional material, facebook page to guage if this is a terrible idea. (seriously, this idea is so out there I don't want to ask actual people I know if it's terrible, because I feel like it's either pioneering or really really terrible, possibly both at the same time) Most of my ideas are like that, it really could go either way.
I also think my judgement might have been effected by writing this, because I really got into character, it was extreme. I might have permanently shattered my psyche.

time is sort of of the essence here, because the trumps might do something so lovely at any moment that would end this choose your own adventure

You're probably like, "What the gently caress, this is really black comedy or absolute insanity or a bold new way to express political satire" but some actual emotions came out of it, surprisingly enough, these characters might get tragic anti hero story arcs. Yeah I did it as a joke because I thought it was a funny idea, but what happens to Eric with the feral racing ostriches is a legitimate tear jerker


LINKS




https://www.facebook.com/G.B.Lovethrash

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