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Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...

C because I hear caves are a !!FUN!! place to be.

E afterwards, clearly we are the sorts of clever heroes who outsmart the foe.

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Zybourne Clock
Oct 25, 2011

Poke me.

C.
H politely ask it to cease and desist its unbecoming behavior tell the people who actually know how to fight where they can find the monster.

Cloud Potato
Jan 8, 2011

"I'm... happy!"


C, then E. You can do it, Clamp! We all believe in you! Just listen to your theme tune!

"Sharpie and Clamp!
Hunt monsters on the cliff!
Sharpie and Clamp!
They'll give any beast a biff!"

Slaan
Mar 16, 2009

Why, yes,
I will poke your Gushing Spring Point!


Pillbug

De aggressive, D. E aggressive!

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011



C, but play some cave-exploring music.
E, but play some monster-trapping music.

Jvie
Aug 10, 2012



Oh my god



Thank you for whoever did this.

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

No need to sign, we'll take care of that.


Lipstick Apathy

CE

Prince of Space
Apr 17, 2016



Dinosaur Gum

CE CE CE

Astus
Nov 11, 2008


DE, have Sharpie act as Clamp's power-ups to overcome obstacles, and then solve puzzles to defeat the boss. I will always think of these two as the main characters of a Rare-esque collectathon.

AJ_Impy
Jun 17, 2007



Yam Slacker

DE

vorebane
Feb 2, 2009


H Sharpie can fly. Find some a lot of makeshift (or preferably proper) pitons, test out what is needed to support Clamp a bit away from the actual route up. Clamp will probably be able to drive in pitons that can support a proper amount of weight. Sharpie should be able to drive in pitons that can support him, maybe 2 at a time, and that will give him the position to drive in a piton that can support a little bit of Clamp. Clamp uses that piton to lift his position easily, and Sharpie can put in pitons in an emergency and safely land. From there Clamp drives in a piton that can support him at a lower position. And so on up the cliff.

Wait we're going up. Edited.

vorebane fucked around with this message at Jan 7, 2018 around 03:46

CourValant
Feb 25, 2016

Do You Remember Love?

D YOU CAN DO IT SHARPIE! DO THE IMPOSSIBLE! PIERCE THE ABOVE!

Do it Sharpie, Kiss The Sky.

H Or, write in your own option.

Engage the monster in a battle of wits; trick it into thinking it can fly.

The Lord of Hats
Aug 22, 2010



CE

Jvie
Aug 10, 2012



Edit: whoops

Jvie fucked around with this message at Jan 8, 2018 around 00:26

Jvie
Aug 10, 2012







We turn back and follow the stream until we reach the place we had passed earlier. The cliffside is still riddled with many deep holes of various sizes.

"What do you think made the holes?"

"I figure holes just are. Eenie meenie miney mo... this one."

"Heh, no way dunko! I'll show you what a real cave is like! Feel this?"

"...Huh?"

"There's air flowing out! That means it must connect somewhere else!"

"...oh. Yeah!"

"Yeah!"

We run into the cave.



"Ow! I hear paraiba are good at spelunking. I have no idea how they do it."

"Duh, they cut marks to the floor so they can feel where they've been already!"

Its so dark! And my head hurts! I'd turn back but I don't know where that is anymore.

"Another dead end. Oh no..."

"Bring it on darkness! I'll fight you!"

There's... there's light over there! We scramble in the dark towards it. Finally I can see again! The tunnel widens up into a large, tall cavern with crystals growing from the walls. To my surprise the floor is not solid brass but something malleable and sticky. As my eyes adjust I see the source of the light, a big opening to the outside on the cavern's ceiling.

"Hey its the exit. Lets fly out of here."

"Uh... there's something over there. Look."




"Whoa. Rad."

"A real Tyrannosaurus Sax! The greatest of tubeasts! That must be the monster!"

"You don't know for sure?"

"Nobody's seen the monster! But look at it! Its enormous! This has to be it!"

"Good thing its sleeping."

"SURE IS!"

This is my chance. Our chance! If we defeat the monster I'll be sharp without question!


"Do you just go to the monster and start cutting it up? I haven't killed one before."

"I'd rather not... That thing is scary. But the hunters showed me once how to catch something scary! You dig a hole and... uh, then the animal goes into the hole!"

"Its brilliant how did I not think of it myself."

After some looking we find a point where the muck of the cavern floor forms a smooth edged pit. It should be doable to deepen it and make it into a real trap.

"Hey lets snap some jewels off the walls and stick them in the bottom. The monster's gonna get hella holed!"



It took a LOT of work but we have made a trap!

"Cawesome. I'm gonna go wake up the thing now."

I stay by the pit as Sharpie slowly approaches the giant monster. Something makes me cough. Argh, what's...



What's this in the air? Ink!? I can't see anything!

"Ho ho ho ho... Do you want to live, brass? Then get on all fours and bark like a woolf."

  • A Do it
    Woolves are cool. Bark bark.

  • B Play music
    Its what I like to do when I panic.

  • C Run blindly
    I can't see anything but anywhere's better than here! I know where the trap is so I won't fall there at least.

  • D Something else?



"HEY UGLY!"

The monster trembled. Yeah, thats right, be scared.

"TUBEAST MORE LIKE TU-LAME!"

It opens up it's eyes. A whole... a whole lot of them. Sheesh. Huh, what's going on back there, I can't see Clamp.

  • E Lead the monster to the trap
    Its probably nothing.

  • F GO FOR THE EYES
    RIP AND TEAR!

  • G Lead the monster in circles
    Its too late to abort the plan. Still, Clamp might get run over if I can't see where he is.

  • H Fly outside
    Coming here was a bad idea. Maybe I can find help outside.

  • I Something else?

Jvie fucked around with this message at Jan 8, 2018 around 00:33

Prince of Space
Apr 17, 2016



Dinosaur Gum

BE calm. We got this.

Slaan
Mar 16, 2009

Why, yes,
I will poke your Gushing Spring Point!


Pillbug

AH- Eh, I'm sure Clamp has got this. Let's let sharpie peace out and find some nice Quith ladies

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

No need to sign, we'll take care of that.


Lipstick Apathy

BE

AJ_Impy
Jun 17, 2007



Yam Slacker

CH When in danger or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout.

Dog Kisser
Mar 30, 2005

But People have fears that beasts do not. Questions, too.


BElieve in yourself!

LLSix
Jan 20, 2010

The real power behind countless overlords

AJ_Impy posted:

CH When in danger or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout.

Wouldn't that be BG?

Astus
Nov 11, 2008


BE, stick to the plan as much as possible, Clamp isn't Sharp enough to improvise. I'm sure the mystery voice is just a bored, whimsical ghost playing a prank, nothing to be worried about.

Yvonmukluk
Oct 10, 2012

I think Charlotte might be...A MAVERICK!



BE

Keep to the plan, chums!

I see what you did there with the trap.

Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...

AE

Just drop the monster into the trap. That's it. Leave it there, and definitely do not remain to check out if it's actually dead.

WereGoat
Apr 28, 2017



BE, BEst choice

Jvie
Aug 10, 2012



All right, voting is closed.

Jvie
Aug 10, 2012







Oh no what's going on!? Who was that?! What- who... Oh, oh! Calm down, deep breaths. Focus on the sounds. Doo doo doo, all is good. doot doot doot...



"That's not what I told you to do at all!"

♬ ♬

"Hey, can you hear me? Hey!"

♬ ♩ ♬ ♩

"Oh fine, if you insist."

















"I didn't tell you to stop! Keep doing those sounds!"

*HACK* *COUGH*

"Keep going!"

*COUGH* "Y-you like my playing?"

"Yes! Keep doing it!"

"O-oh wow! Nobody has ever said they like my music before! Lets be friends mister!"

"YES! NOW PLAY!"



W-what happened to my new friend? Oh that's right, the monster must have hit him!

"Are you all right mister?"

*HROONK*

Its still alive? The monster trashes in pain. It's lower body is still outside the pit and it keeps kicking my friend over and over. Pieces of him are flying off! I could cut the monster's leg to make it stop.

  • A Save The Turgid
    He is my friend. I'm taking him home!
  • B Don't
    Maybe I'll find someone else who likes my music.

-~X~-

HROOOONK

The beast is still not dead? It trashes and struggles, finally managing to barely raise it's head out of the pit trap.



"D-don't come closer!"

"Relax, Clamps. Its safe."

"What??"

"You are looking at The Beastmaster, heh. Me and tuber had a battle of wills and tuber lost."

"I didn't know that's even possible?"

"That's because you arent the best Edgerdemain-doer alive, that'd be me. Heh. I had to just barely work my mojo and it lost the will to resist."

Sharpie flutters onto the monster's back. It doesn't react.

"Wanna go joyriding?"

  • C Lets go chase that guy who said that eyeshades are stupid.
  • D Lets finish off the tubeast.
  • E Something else?

Slaan
Mar 16, 2009

Why, yes,
I will poke your Gushing Spring Point!


Pillbug

A- We must save our Turgid friend

D- Just make sure it's dead. We got better things to do. Like play music with our new buddy

Cloud Potato
Jan 8, 2011

"I'm... happy!"


Voting A since we made a new friend and don't want him to get hurt, although this might conflict with Sharpie's new friend getting hurt.

Then E: Ride the Tubeast into town! Everyone will see how good at capturing monsters we are and invite us to their cool parties, except we won't go because the coolest party in town is right here with us, baby! Yeah!

Prince of Space
Apr 17, 2016



Dinosaur Gum

AD

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011



AD
Put the saxy beast out of its misery and jam with our spooky new friend.

Astus
Nov 11, 2008


Cloud Potato posted:

Voting A since we made a new friend and don't want him to get hurt, although this might conflict with Sharpie's new friend getting hurt.

Then E: Ride the Tubeast into town! Everyone will see how good at capturing monsters we are and invite us to their cool parties, except we won't go because the coolest party in town is right here with us, baby! Yeah!

I'm also going with AE, as this is clearly the most whimsical plan.

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

No need to sign, we'll take care of that.


Lipstick Apathy

AE

AJ_Impy
Jun 17, 2007



Yam Slacker

AE

vorebane
Feb 2, 2009


A E Ride the tubeast and find the guys looking for the monster, whether it's this thing or what. Which is what we were supposed to be doing in the first place.

Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...

BC

WereGoat
Apr 28, 2017



Cloud Potato posted:

Voting A since we made a new friend and don't want him to get hurt, although this might conflict with Sharpie's new friend getting hurt.

Then E: Ride the Tubeast into town! Everyone will see how good at capturing monsters we are and invite us to their cool parties, except we won't go because the coolest party in town is right here with us, baby! Yeah!

Do eeeet

Jvie
Aug 10, 2012



Voting is over. All right, the next update is going to be the final one.

Jvie
Aug 10, 2012






I've just doubled my number of friends, I can't lose the new one right away! I run to the beast and bite on it's leg as hard as I can. I hear a terrible honk and the world becomes a blur as the monster shakes me around. After a bit my jaw gives out and I'm thrown far away, landing painfully on my back. O-ouch. This is more dangerous than I though monster hunting would be! It hurts but I manage to raise a shaky arm and feel my face. My teeth are bent but nothing more serious than that. I wince again realizing how painful its going to be to have them twisted back straight. At least my big friend is alive. The monster has shifted away from him. There's... bits of him laying around but he's still moving! Uh, more like wobbling, but still!

-~X~-

The tubeast awkwardly struggles out of the pit. Its... not looking good. The monster's front half is riddled with holes and thick fluid is slowly dripping out form them. I approach slowly, this doesn't feel like a good idea. Or actually, it kind of does. When I place my hand on the monster's leg and it doesn't react at all.

"Come on lets ride already!"

"Wait, we need to help the big mister over there. He's my new friend and he's hurt! You don't leave friends in monster caves!"

"Sure, Tuber can pick him up no problem."

The tubast walks over to the shadowy mister, and sucks him(well, most of him) into it's mouth!

"Ooooohhh... Huh, what the?!?!"

"Lets ride."

-~X~-





Clamp and Sharpie rode the monster all the way back into the valley. It seemed to know the route already. Good thing since neither of them had any idea how to ride anything. The people fled in terror from their path but soon it was seen that the beast was totally in their control. Everyone gathered to gawk and sing their praises for breaking the beast.

"But... didn't you set out to find out what happened to the previous hunters?"

"Uh... Oh I forgot! Man, its easy to get carried away when you are on an adventure!"





-~X~-

The elite hunters did return soon, empty handed and starving. Their humiliation was complete as they saw that Clamp of all people had outdone them.

People of the valley had no warm feelings for The Turgid. Nihilthos were known as corpse eaters at best and monsters at worst. Everyone had heard horror stories of people drained by them alive, their bodies still breathing but their minds gone. Still, Clamp the monster rider was on Turgid's side. People were uneasy but they would allow it to stay, seeing it took to the tenets of sharpness very quickly. Almost as if it already knew them from before.

-~X~-

Even after the tubeast succumbed to it's wounds Clamp and Sharpie were celebrated as heroes.



That they indeed were.



But which of them, was a Hero?


  • A Clamp
  • B Sharpie
  • C Both of them! [10% chance of success]
  • D The Turgid, obviously


-~X~-

And that's the end. The vote for a new hero is still on but in the meantime you should also prepare for the next era by rolling up new gods!

NEW GODS posted:

  • If you were a god in the previous Era, you cannot be one in the new one. In the Era following that you still have -10 to your roll.
  • When you roll the 1d00, add your current spirit points to the roll! The people who become gods lose their points, having spent them.
  • The spirit points are cumulative over the Eras. If you don't get in now you can keep collecting more for better chances next time!

I know the pace of updates has been pretty hectic so far. That's mainly because I've had a lot of free time during the holidays. Things are inveitably going to slow down as normal life resumes. So, you shouldn't feel that you can't participate if you don't post every single day. Go on and be a god!

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Crazycryodude
Aug 15, 2015

Lets get our X tons of Duranium back!

....Is that still a valid thing to jingoistically blow out of proportion?







God Roll: 1d100+3 87

I, uh, I wasn't actually expecting to do that well. poo poo. Now I might have to think of a god.

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