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"Oh, my hard drive crashed? Ah, that's fine, I have all my files backed up on a thumbdrive. This one, right here, on my keychain." "But you-" "I update and check it every day. It's fine." I plugged it in. Wanna guess what was on it?  "Yes, that's the backup! Just click on it, they'll all be there!" Bonus: he had been doing it the right way before, but then he discovered this trick that was much faster!
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Jan 2, 2018 07:04
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Zamboni Apocalypse posted:I believe the correct version for incoming fire is "For what we are about to receive, dear Lord make us thankful." I always use "... may we be truly grateful."
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Jan 9, 2018 04:12
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Today at work: "Town hall meeting" (i.e. a video presentation with attached all-hands moderated chat) about a new primary net connection / proxy server / etc which is going to be the Wave of the Future and Make Everything Better For Everyone: Todd Smith has raised a hand Moderator has unmuted Todd Smith (Todd Smith) With the new server, is the company doing any sort of man in the middle SSL monitoring? Moderator has muted Todd Smith (Presenter) We have not started HTTPS / SSL traffic inspection with this change. (Hmm. I noticed the careful way he phrased that without actually answering the question...) You have raised your hand Moderator has unmuted you (sfwarlock) Were we already doing https / ssl monitoring before the change? Moderator has muted you You have been permanently muted You have been removed from presentation audience "Tomorrow's Network Today"
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Mar 23, 2018 00:58
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Zil posted:Also hello to the packet sniffers at sfwarlock's place of work. Phone posting, yo. Thanks Ants posted:Surely you'd know if SSL inspection was being done because the root certs would need to be on your machines It's not something I would have thought to look for before. Then again, I don't do personal poo poo on work machines anyways.
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Mar 23, 2018 01:58
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Judge Schnoopy posted:The apps most likely use multicast broadcasts which are never* routed. One word: Chromecasts. More words: An ex-cow-orker of mine laughed at me for buying NUCs to power TV displays and instead spent a week developing a "proof of concept" with Chromecasts. Then laughed at me again when the bosses loved that solution and told me to return the NUCs. Then the Chromecasts sat there happily broadcasting out over the wireless VLAN trying to find someone to talk to while my cow orker screamed at me for setting up VLANs and I sat there wondering if Google eats their own dogfood.
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Apr 6, 2018 02:50
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Renegret posted:https://twitter.com/TSAmedia_SariK/status/1016433783774633985 Root cause: someone typed sudo apt-get install python
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Jul 11, 2018 03:41
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"Need more toner on the (location redacted) color pizza."
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Jul 23, 2018 20:33
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"How bad is he hurt?" "Dunno yet. Might be somewhere between 'seriously' and 'very'." "Is he hurt so bad that I'll feel like an rear end in a top hat if I fire him?" "I mean, I might ask Legal first..." Ticket came in from a branch office, about 20 people staffed there, something about the internet occasionally dropping. My coworker - the only other "IT guy" at this regional office - takes it on himself to - Leave as if for late lunch, and for all I know actually have lunch. - Drive 60+ miles out to this site without telling me or anyone else at either site - Show up there about 3pm to find about twelve people in the office; apparently someone popular had their last day that day and some of them are out continuing the going-away party, including the office manager and the site manager. - Accept two slices of pizza and some soda. - Badge himself into the server room and let the door lock behind him. What happened afterwards is still a matter of speculation, but staff heard a very loud "thuddy-crashy kind of a noise." Knocking and calling brought no response, and everyone with an authorized badge/master key was offsite and not answering their phones. Fortunately, before they had to form up search parties to try to find one of the managers (party search parties?) or call locksmiths, one of them was tried - and was able - to pick the lock. When they got into the room, they find him laying on the ground semi-conscious, next to a broken stepstool, cradling a bump "the size of half a tennis ball" on his head. He has no memory of what exactly happened and we had no cameras in there. They tried to help him to his feet, at which point he spewed half-digested pizza all over the place - and all over one of the rescuers. That's when they called 911. He has a concussion, a huge cut on his side which may have been off part of the stepstool as he fell through it, and pieces of his phone in his thigh. "... and see if he has a leg to stand on. In court, that is." "I hate you."
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Sep 14, 2018 21:39
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Sickening posted:Yes. Companies, pay your loving workmans comp claims and shut the gently caress up. He is absolutely going to get covered for it, but at the same time there were several dumb things that were done here. Mind you, we can't quite point to the employee handbook and say "You failed to follow this line." (although we are looking over the OSHA rules on confined-space work (which I don't think apply, but IANAL)), partially because we don't have much of a handbook; but at the same time, he should have propped the door, he should have let me or someone here know where he was going, he's a pretty big dude and that stepstool may only have been rated for 200 lbs... there was not a lot of good judgment or foresight demonstrated here. I think every org needs to go through something like this to see changes made; they are hiring someone to rewrite the (or, more likely, provide us with a framework for a whole new) employee handbook, cameras are going in, official stools are being ordered, and of course after this, orientation will be more in-depth.
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Sep 17, 2018 22:17
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Inspector_666 posted:If I went into the server room here and severely injured myself, only to have my boss cite the OSHA rules on confined-space work to fire me for said injury I would have to be physically restrained. I phrased that a little weirdly. We are looking into whether it counts as a confined space for purposes of determining whether we should have provided training on working inside of it. We , they, whatever, collective pronouns are weird.
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Sep 17, 2018 23:10
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quote:Type: Incident My new minion, folks...
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Sep 26, 2018 01:14
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Methanar posted:If someone sent me a l33tsp3ak email I'd flatly tell them to rewrite it. Tell them to revert it.
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Oct 17, 2018 15:05
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D. Ebdrup posted:I was about to say that they only have a facebook page, but that's not true anymore, so click here to make all your dreams come true!! that url posted:cnmod.cn uses an invalid security certificate. The certificate is only valid for the following names: https://www.webhostingtest1.com webhostingtest1.com Error code: SSL_ERROR_BAD_CERT_DOMAIN The funniest part is the 1.
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Feb 14, 2019 09:26
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AlexDeGruven posted:The only time you should be using all caps is if you're the person managing the Not A Wolf Twitter account Another counterpoint: https://twitter.com/FROGTips
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Feb 26, 2019 12:31
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Arquinsiel posted:A friend of a friend used to do security for a porn site that allowed user uploads and he said the day he realised he had to quit was when he was called into a meeting for his professional opinion on "does she look underage to you?" This is where my smart mouth would get me into trouble. I'd be tempted to crack something like "Yeah, but not in a bad way."
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Jun 28, 2019 21:04
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Thanks Ants posted:If you're explicitly requesting that a human does something rather than a script that can perform the same operation as many times as necessary and log all output then you are a manager.
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Jul 7, 2019 21:26
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It's cool, someone's just streaming.
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Jul 11, 2019 05:30
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BackupExec was rock-loving-solid until Symantec bought it.
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Aug 2, 2019 04:50
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spankmeister posted:Hey they at least need to try ipconfig /release, ipconfig /renew and ipconfig /flushdns too! Clear cache and cookies too! In every browser!
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Oct 15, 2019 06:03
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Fil5000 posted:I find it weird that I seem to be the only person I know who uses Shift-Delete/Ctrl-Insert/Shift-Insert for cut/copy/paste. Was there some point where those were the only way of doing cut/copy/paste or something because I can't think why I do that instead of Ctrl-X/C/V. I remember those from like, MSDOS EDIT and QBASIC. Dirt Road Junglist posted:Use icacls to Deny all permissions to Everyone, Authenticated Users, Domain Users, and Users. Technically! The best kind of correct! klosterdev posted:I actually came across a case last week where VLC had trouble handling an .mkv that Windows 10 player handled perfectly. Ditching VLC for the Windows player to watch anime felt so counterintuitive to everything teenage-me knew. VLC on Android has been failing me altely on lots of stuff.
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Nov 23, 2019 04:39
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Ordered 100+ HDMI KVMs to solve a thing. Manager approved it. His manager approved it. Procurement "found a cheaper supplier." We now have 150 VGA KVMs.
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Dec 3, 2019 00:19
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Methanar posted:Why do you need 150 KVMs This hoteling concept that this idiot came up with. Each desk gets a desktop and a docking station and a KVM. If you have a laptop, you dock it and KVM into the dock. If you don't have a laptop - or forgot yours - you KVM to the desktop. It falls under "mine is not to reason why." EDIT: By the way, neither these thin desktops or the docks have VGA.
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Dec 3, 2019 00:24
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MF_James posted:The question is, are they going to admit fault and purchase what you wanted or are they going to get adapter cables and make life shittier and dumber for everyone. They've already asked about the adapter cables. They're going to compare them to the restocking fee. 
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Dec 3, 2019 00:59
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sfwarlock posted:This hoteling concept that this idiot came up with. Each desk gets a desktop and a docking station and a KVM. It gets better. I asked about are we purchasing a large number of docks. The answer is no. He wants laptop users to carry their docks with them and "just plug them in every morning, IT can show them how."
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Dec 3, 2019 18:51
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Inspector_666 posted:Switched outlets make total sense in a home but I can't think of a single thing in an office that I would want setup like that. Unless you work at a lamp showroom, I guess? I have a client like that where the big fancy projector in the big conference room is tied into the motion detector outlet. Probably they want to avoid it being left on overnight as well.
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Dec 12, 2019 08:00
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Weedle posted:This is the absolute worst job listing I have ever seen in my life. 
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Jan 4, 2020 21:51
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Someone who's been on PTO since last year came back and ... long story short, she had had "2019" in her password and expected the system to update it automatically to "2020".
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Jan 15, 2020 21:11
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D34THROW posted:As much as I WANT a Win10 laptop and Office 365 alongside 2013, I don't want these problems and am glad to have my 2010 Win7 Pro x64 laptop. I have lately idly been trying to install Win10 on my Acer Aspire One D150. Dual core, 32bit, Atom N280 clocked at 1.66Ghz. Maxed at 2 gigs of ram. 945GSE graphics. At least it has an SSD...
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Feb 12, 2020 06:42
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"Every time I plug in my headphones, my computer turns off." I sent the minion. (Every time we get a weird one, I send the minion.) The minion calls me from the user's desk, "Homeslice, you are not going to believe this. Every time he plugs in his headphones, Windows shuts itself down." "The devil you say. What happens when he ... unplugs them?" Pause. "Nothing." "Okay. Have him plug them back in." Pause. Longer pause. "It's booting up." Further experimenting established that a) it only happened to the user, not my minion; b) it only happened when docked and c) it happened with all headphones/headsets tried. Solution: User is using a Dell USB-C dock, and the (hard-to-see) power button is right above the headphone jack. However he rested his hand as he plugged the headphones in, it pushed down on the button for long enough to signal Windows to shut off.
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Feb 25, 2020 06:58
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bell jar posted:My Dell USB-C dock doesn't have a power button (that I can find) and it annoys the poo poo out of me. You also can't remove the USB-C to USB-A dongle from it, which I never want to use. It sucks With the two models we have, (WD15 and WD19) they're on the top, at the front right corner.
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Feb 26, 2020 19:55
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I'll just put the notes in here: "Caller reports dropouts on video calls and frequent VPN disconnects." "Ping testing to router shows severe packet loss and latency issues. Cx unable to use wireless, as parent insisted it be disabled on grounds it 'gives you the corvid'." "Cx also advises that parent also cut network cable from living room to bedroom because it was "on stairs and a trip hazard", cx attempted repair with elec tape & wirenuts." "Advised Cx to obtain replacement cable."
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May 10, 2020 09:30
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A coffeeshop across the street from a previous employer was in view of "Pretty Fly For A Wifi" and "Have You Stopped Beating Your Wifi".
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May 12, 2020 20:56
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RFC2324 posted:I just want "guru" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guru_Meditation
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Jun 22, 2020 05:57
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Darchangel posted:This, so much this. I wasn't security, but Desktop Support. You can't give them an inch. If it isn't random malware because they can't treat a work computer as, well, a work computer, it's their phone addictions. Ask me about the time I drove 200 miles in the middle of the night to "fix" a printer that was "broken" because some selfish poo poo had unplugged it to charge their phone. Actually, no need to ask me, because that's basically the whole story.
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Jun 27, 2020 18:01
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An IT Saga, in three acts plus a coda. Act I: All, During the stepdown of the LAX datacenter, an unauthorized USB Mass Storage Device ("thumbdrive") was found plugged into a server. This is a critical security violation and can have consequences up to and including termination. All of you know better. The offending device has been destroyed. - Mitch Act II: Update! The following 47 servers have passed the scream test and will be removed from LAX-DC-01 by 2020-05-31, with secure wipe and e-waste/recycling to follow by 2020-06-30: Act III: Hi (warlock) Hate to bug you on the holiday weekend, but my (mumble) software is giving a strange error, see screenshot. ("Licensing server not found on network, 28 day grace period expired.") Coda: > Hi Mitch > About this unauthorized thumbdrive that was found in LAX DC, did it possibly look like this? (Attached image of multi-thousand dollar USB license dongle) (warlock), As you know, attaching unauthorized USB Mass Storage Devices ("thumbdrives") to a (Company) computer is a critical security violation and grounds for possible termination. Expect further communication on this matter through your supervisor and/or HR. Your device has been destroyed and will not be returned.
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Jul 6, 2020 17:07
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Act IV FWD: Security Breach in LAX-DC-01 To: (bunches of people, including CIO, Director of IT, and my boss) > During the stepdown of the LAX datacenter, an unauthorized USB Mass Storage Device ("thumbdrive") was found plugged into a server. He actually emailed in to ask if we'd seen it! > ---------- Forwarded message --------- > From: (warlock) > About this unauthorized thumbdrive that was found in LAX DC, did it possibly look like this? WE GOT HIM. - Mitch
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Jul 6, 2020 18:04
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Act V From: (warlock's boss) Re: FWD: Security Breach in LAX-DC-01 I spoke with warlock regarding this issue. *) To my certain knowledge, he has never been to LAX-DC-01. *) The "thumbdrive" that was destroyed held the license for the (mumble) system, which is why an entire department cannot work this morning. (Attached image of multi-thousand dollar USB license dongle) *) The server that was removed and wiped had the license cached, but that is gone now as well. (Please let me know AS SOON AS POSSIBLE if the servers were not actually wiped / disposed of yet.) *) (mumble) Co will not replace this dongle, as we are on v9 of the software, which is now End of Life. I am waiting for (vendor) to get back to me with a quote for the version they will support, which is v11. Expect that to be in the six figures, not including if we have to stand up another licensing server.
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Jul 6, 2020 18:52
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Super Soaker Party! posted:I think he's just using "(mumble)" as in "It's my birthday, I'm <mumblemumble> years old!" i.e. a standin for saying the actual name. I highly doubt any VOIP software is six-figures and uses a license-dongle mechanism, it's probably some CAD or chip design package. Right. Not mumble literally. Neddy Seagoon posted:Will he resign, or go down swinging until he's fired? I gotta know!! ConfusedUs posted:I would put ten bucks on “goes down swinging” Super Soaker Party! posted:Mitch is definitely gonna go down swinging, he found UNAUTHORIZED JUMPDRIVES of COURSE he's in the right here. SECURITY IS PARAMOUNT. Yeah, I would bet a lot on "goes down swinging." I just wish he hadn't dragged my name into the witch hunt, because at end of year reviews, people are going to remember that I was there and not why... stevewm posted:Strange.... this sounds so much like the many thousand dollar software we use that also has a dongle. ... They stopped supporting v9 of their software some time ago, and only support v11 or the newly released v12. After nearly being doxxed because of here once, I tend to slightly Dragnet my posts. Don't trust specific numbers like that. Or the 47 here: Super Soaker Party! posted:Not even a server room, it's a DATACENTER. Which, I mean, I'm presuming is an actual datacenter environment if they're decommissioning 47 physical servers (i.e. a normal server room isn't gonna house 100-200 physical servers, which would be a good guess as to the total number if 47 is the number that's being removed). Although it is a colo site at which we/they had ... quite a few racks in our/their name. Kurieg posted:But don't you understand? USB Devices aren't allowed! I'm kind of picturing him having a youtube channel with under 10 subscribers "Hi everyone, this is Security Guru Mitch speaking to you. Earlier today we found this unauthorized USB Mass Storage Device, or 'thumbdrive', in our datacenter, which is a critical security violation and carries penalties up to and including being terminated. What we're going to do is dig a little grave for this thing, and fill it with my special mixture of thermite... " GreenNight posted:On top of that, what kind of guy is he that he thinks random rear end users are walking into the server room just plugging poo poo in? Clearly they're walking in and just plugging poo poo in, because, look! poo poo that was plugged in! Geemer posted:Please tell me this was one of the licensing dongles that also has their exact purpose printed on them + serial no, making it really hard to mistake them for flash drives if you take a second to look at them. The one I dug up as an example from a google image search is plain black and has printed in white on one side "(LOGO) MUMBLE V9" and on the other "INSTALL AND LICENSING" Granted, knowing this guy, even if it had said "DO NOT REMOVE" and "END OF THE WORLD" he'd sneer and say "You're not fooling me, hacker!" EDIT: Dirt Road Junglist posted:I... uh... I bent my dongle. Goddamn it, I've been giggling over this for ten solid minutes. Clearly I am 12 today. sfwarlock fucked around with this message at 20:42 on Jul 6, 2020 |
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Jul 6, 2020 20:20
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Chronojam posted:In our intro courses, (we(had(handwritten(lisp(tests,gross))))) Were you a Bear? Sarern posted:I'm fervently hoping for at least one more update on the Mitch Saga. Funny you should ask! hey bossman, any update on the dongle dangle danger? Since your name is out of it now, they cut me out of the loop, but I know two things: One, (Director of IT) is really unhappy with the tone Mitch took, especially the "WE GOT HIM" Two, when I said "six figures" [to replace the dongle and license the new version], I was mostly trying to scare Mitch, but holy poo poo... sfwarlock fucked around with this message at 18:38 on Jul 7, 2020 |
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Jul 7, 2020 18:29
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shortspecialbus posted:and became infamous for the CAPITAL LETTERS defense. Sovereign citizen?
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Jul 8, 2020 06:55
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