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gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007
there are in fact laws against drugging, kidnapping and assaulting someone. i assume there are exceptions made for nsm.

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Small Strange Bird
Sep 22, 2006

Merci, chaton!
Wonder how things would go in court on a drugging rap if the counsel for the defence went "So, Mr -Man. You allege that my client told you she was adding something to your drink, you watched her pour it into your drink... and you still drank it?"

Twelve by Pies
May 4, 2012

Again a very likpatous story
It's against the law to kidnap a man, but is it against the law to kidnap a spider man? He could just be a giant hivemind of spiders who believe they are a human!

And then we'd get an entire storyline of Peter wondering if he's actually just a giant colony of spiders.

Ikasuhito
Sep 29, 2013

Haram as Fuck.

To be fair, how exactly would that work? Since Spider-Man is the victim he would need to be both be apart of the investigation and apart of the trail and that's just not going to happen since he's a vigilante who (snrk) wants to protect his secret identity.

Murdstone
Jun 14, 2005

I'm feeling Jimmy




Peter has already forgotten his weeks of being harassed by a TV doctor followed by his encounter with Kingpin.

Small Strange Bird
Sep 22, 2006

Merci, chaton!
Weren't they just minutes ago relaxing in the sun on the roof? Man, MJ either had a massive mood swing or there's a billboard outside the window with pictures, pictures of Peter having an affair.

MorningMoon
Dec 29, 2013

He's been tapping into Aunt May's bank account!
Didn't I kill him with a HELICOPTER?

Otherkinsey Scale
Jul 17, 2012

Just a little bit of sunshine!

Payndz posted:

Wonder how things would go in court on a drugging rap if the counsel for the defence went "So, Mr -Man. You allege that my client told you she was adding something to your drink, you watched her pour it into your drink... and you still drank it?"

Knowing what we know now, it's even odds that Kingpin told her "I'm worried about Spider-Man's health, give him this tablet that's a vitamin supplement and definitely not a knockout drug" and she just did so without question.

Lobok
Jul 13, 2006

Say Watt?


A mallet, MJ. Y'know, that comically oversized hammer-looking thing that the Bugs Bunny keeps hitting your husband's head with?

gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007
well, if you say universal weapon no one is going to picture a fancy sledgehammer.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Payndz posted:

Weren't they just minutes ago relaxing in the sun on the roof? Man, MJ either had a massive mood swing or there's a billboard outside the window with pictures, pictures of Peter having an affair.

The photos were taken by Spider-Man who always seems to be around when Peter Parker does something stupid!

MonsterEnvy
Feb 4, 2012

Shocked I tell you

Johnny Walker posted:



Peter has already forgotten his weeks of being harassed by a TV doctor followed by his encounter with Kingpin.

He just called Kingpin a gorilla.

Haifisch
Nov 13, 2010

Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!



Taco Defender




I want to see 70s Spidey specifically face the Hulk. All eras of NSM have a peabrain to match the Hulk, but only 70s Peter has the temper to go with it.

Twelve by Pies
May 4, 2012

Again a very likpatous story

I do not like this second panel. Peter's smug aura mocks me.

MorningMoon
Dec 29, 2013

He's been tapping into Aunt May's bank account!
Didn't I kill him with a HELICOPTER?


hate that third panel

Murdstone
Jun 14, 2005

I'm feeling Jimmy


David D. Davidson
Nov 17, 2012

Orca lady?
"I'm talking about ME."

gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007
just take off your shirt, peter.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

MorningMoon posted:



hate that third panel

Glad to see the final panel narration is being handled by Peter personally now.

gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007
in this case the enemy of his enemy does indeed defy easy classification. horrible garbage eating space son is quite a mouthful.

Haifisch
Nov 13, 2010

Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!



Taco Defender



ZepiaEltnamOberon
Oct 25, 2010

I Failed At Anime 2022
If revenge is both savory and best served cold, what food is most similar to revenge?

Cold cuts and cheese?

Push El Burrito
May 9, 2006

Soiled Meat
Vengeance is gabagool.

davidspackage
May 16, 2007

Nap Ghost

I like how MJ just dramatically turns away from that monstrous after making her point. A stage actress to the bone.

The Question IRL
Jun 8, 2013

Only two contestants left! Here is Doom's chance for revenge...

Jerusalem posted:

The photos were taken by Spider-Man who always seems to be around when Peter Parker does something stupid!

"I want to be cucked! Cucked by Spider-man!"

MorningMoon
Dec 29, 2013

He's been tapping into Aunt May's bank account!
Didn't I kill him with a HELICOPTER?


Peter we just spent a whole week establishing that the raccoon can handily beat you in a fight.

Lobok
Jul 13, 2006

Say Watt?

So far Rocket has referenced spiders, rhinos, tigers, and in a roundabout way, dinosaurs. But he has no idea what a raccoon is.

Murdstone
Jun 14, 2005

I'm feeling Jimmy




Abs are out.

Push El Burrito
May 9, 2006

Soiled Meat
poo poo it's time for the MJ stealth sections.

MorningMoon
Dec 29, 2013

He's been tapping into Aunt May's bank account!
Didn't I kill him with a HELICOPTER?

Johnny Walker posted:



Abs are out.

Panel 2 Peter thought "do things together" meant sex :(

MonsterEnvy
Feb 4, 2012

Shocked I tell you

It's funny cause I don't think Spider-Man thinking he is crazy is even Kingpin's plan here.

Twelve by Pies
May 4, 2012

Again a very likpatous story
I'm pretty sure Kingpin's plan is to smear Spider-Man's good name (well, mostly good, since the Bugle is the only paper I think constantly claims Spidey is a menace) and make people (but probably most importantly, the police) think he's a criminal so he can't operate freely anymore.

But it's definitely much more fun to imagine Kingpin's plan is just to make Spider-Man think he's crazy. I mean hell, that was basically his entire plan with the TV doctor.

gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007
she helps him all the time because nsm is incompetent.

Haifisch
Nov 13, 2010

Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!



Taco Defender
Gaslighting NSM is Kingpin's hobby. He doesn't really consider Spidey his nemesis, he just likes loving with him.

MorningMoon
Dec 29, 2013

He's been tapping into Aunt May's bank account!
Didn't I kill him with a HELICOPTER?


MJ is freaking out man :ohdear:

Murdstone
Jun 14, 2005

I'm feeling Jimmy


ConfusedUs
Feb 24, 2004

Bees?
You want fucking bees?
Here you go!
ROLL INITIATIVE!!






Batman canonically exists in the NSM universe. TIL

Also lol, Pete, MJ is ten times more capable than you.

Push El Burrito
May 9, 2006

Soiled Meat

ConfusedUs posted:

Batman canonically exists in the NSM universe. TIL

Also lol, Pete, MJ is ten times more capable than you.

He also exists in regular Marvel.

Lobok
Jul 13, 2006

Say Watt?

drat Pete, Robin was barely a teenager. You really know how to burn your wife (and the theatre at which she works).


More Batman content:

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Haifisch
Nov 13, 2010

Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!



Taco Defender




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