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Punkreas
May 13, 2013

*chews on head*


Lipstick Apathy

Just read through all of the stories for this week and enjoyed them greatly!

Or, in the spirit of Thunderdome: they were all total rubbish, only deserving to be printed on paper so they can be torn to pieces before being tossed into a trash fire.

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Mercedes
Mar 7, 2006

"So you Jesus?"

"And you black?"

"Nigga prove it!"

And so Black Jesus turned water into a bucket of chicken. And He saw that it was good.






Bolt Crank posted:

Thunderdome: they were all total rubbish, only deserving to be printed on paper so they can be torn to pieces before being tossed into a trash fire.

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010



Legit Cyberpunk





Bolt Crank posted:

Just read through all of the stories for this week and enjoyed them greatly!

Or, in the spirit of Thunderdome: they were all total rubbish, only deserving to be printed on paper so they can be torn to pieces before being tossed into a trash fire.

Interprompt: they grow up so young (300 words)

Mercedes
Mar 7, 2006

"So you Jesus?"

"And you black?"

"Nigga prove it!"

And so Black Jesus turned water into a bucket of chicken. And He saw that it was good.






dreadmojo posted:

Interprompt: they grow up so young (300 words)

"Can I please go to the bar with you guys? You never take me," Gavin said.

I gave him his teddy bear and tucked him into bed. "I'm sorry Dad," I said, "Tomorrow is your first day of seventh grade. You want to read the Berenstain Bears tonight?"

derp
Jan 21, 2010

when i get up all i want to do is go to bed again



Lipstick Apathy

dreadmojo posted:

Interprompt: they grow up so young (300 words)

The machine was perfected just in time. Shortly after she flipped the 'on' switch, the last adult human collapsed due to heart failure caused by the weaponized virus 'heart breaker,' which was airborne, incurable, and caused almost instant heart-failure upon contact. The one catch was, for whatever reason, it didn't affect anyone under six months old.

A couple cleaning robots scurried into the room and dragged away the corpse of the woman who'd turned on the machine. The only sound was the wailing of infants. Rows and rows and columns and stacks of them, each one in its own incubator, crying for non existent mothers. The machine monitored, fed, and examined each baby constantly, checking the progress of the virus and collecting data for further research. The machine also collected a cell sample from each baby, which it combined with others to create new embryos to grow into more babies.

Every now and then one of the babies reached its six month deadline and spasmed to death in heart failure, and a robot attendant scurried over to drag it away, and replace it with a new one that had grown strong enough to be taken from the artificial wombs in the other room.

Eventually, one of the babies would be immune. Eventually. Until then, humanity was incubating, waiting for the right time to grow.

AllNewJonasSalk
Apr 22, 2017

THUNDERDOME LOSER

dreadmojo posted:

Interprompt: they grow up so young (300 words)

I haven't paid for sex in a long while. And I'd never be likely to pay again. Not after what happened the last time anyway. It was very much a misunderstanding. The evening was drawing towards a close. The sun peeked out over the horizon and the early morning hues of pink and gold seemed to stretch out for eternity.

My nose leaked cocaine and had I blown into a napkin the police would have been able to use my mucus as evidence against me in every court of law. I marveled at the white flakes as they streamed from my nose. Digging for gold took on a new meaning every evening as I used a saline flush to remove the remnants of blow my body refused to absorb and assimilate.

Just as I prepared to make the journey home, a black child appeared in my path. He dressed in purple and blue and his fedora was tilted at an angle. He couldn't have been more than twelve but when he spoke his voice carried across the distance between us like a foghorn bellowing against the soft white blanket that enshrouded in.

"You looking for a good time? I got some people I think you'd love to meet," he said.

I was indeed looking for a good time, but I had been thinking more along the lines of pornography in the comfort of my own home. I started to say this but instead the cocaine spoke for me.

"Sure, kid, as long as they're of age I'm down for anything."

He assured me that all his girls were perfectly legal as far as illegal prostitutes went. I followed him as he led me down an empty alley I'd never noticed before.

And then older children appeared from the shadows with knives and knuckles of brass. They beat me and warned that I should never return to their neighborhood. Drug tourists would no longer be tolerated.

Punkreas
May 13, 2013

*chews on head*


Lipstick Apathy

dreadmojo posted:

Interprompt: they grow up so young (300 words)

Stew Fly, Don't Bother Me
197 words

A big fly lands on my neck and bites me. I yelp and try to swear only to get a mouthful of the nickel-sized insects, which buzz violently as they stick to my tongue and cheeks. I immediately dry heave, covering my mouth as best as possible as spit gushes from my salivary glands out into long, viscous strands dangling towards the floor as I gag. The barrage of flies intensifies as I push through the kitchen, becoming a wall of droning noise and needle-like pricks of pain on every bare inch of my skin. Eventually my clothes stop affording me protection, and I can feel my shirt billow as they swarm into it, harassing the tender bits of flesh underneath.

I swear that yesterday they were just little baby maggots, happily thrashing about in leftover beef stroganoff! Or was it last week when I found that stew pot crammed into the back of the pantry? Wait, these pests might be from the homemade tapioca I made for the Halloween party, over there next to the holiday turkey carcass. I really should take care of that before this gets any worse.

Nah, I’ll clean it up later.

AllNewJonasSalk
Apr 22, 2017

THUNDERDOME LOSER

Haha for a second I thought that would be about a dog, Bolt Crank. Another Scooter to round out the bunch!

Punkreas
May 13, 2013

*chews on head*


Lipstick Apathy

Sorry to mislead, but I suppose there's always room under the bio-dome for another future pup!

AllNewJonasSalk
Apr 22, 2017

THUNDERDOME LOSER

I also want to chime in and say I like all of the stories I've read so far this week. They all have something interesting in them that really nails that uncomfortable feeling I get when I stare into the abyss that lies deep within my mind. So thanks for that!

Mercedes
Mar 7, 2006

"So you Jesus?"

"And you black?"

"Nigga prove it!"

And so Black Jesus turned water into a bucket of chicken. And He saw that it was good.






I'm sick of hearing about all this feel good huggy poo poo. This is a place of PAIN, let's act like it.


...your mom's ugly.

Bolt Crank posted:

Stew Fly, Don't Bother Me
197 words

A big fly lands on my neck and bites me. I yelp and try to swear only to get a mouthful of the nickel-sized insects, which buzz violently as they stick to my tongue and cheeks. I immediately dry heave, covering my mouth as best as possible as spit gushes from my salivary glands out into long, viscous strands dangling towards the floor as I gag. The barrage of flies intensifies as I push through the kitchen, becoming a wall of droning noise and needle-like pricks of pain on every bare inch of my skin. Eventually my clothes stop affording me protection, and I can feel my shirt billow as they swarm into it, harassing the tender bits of flesh underneath.

I swear that yesterday they were just little baby maggots, happily thrashing about in leftover beef stroganoff! Or was it last week when I found that stew pot crammed into the back of the pantry? Wait, these pests might be from the homemade tapioca I made for the Halloween party, over there next to the holiday turkey carcass. I really should take care of that before this gets any worse.

Nah, I’ll clean it up later.

Also, that's disgusting. I love it.

derp
Jan 21, 2010

when i get up all i want to do is go to bed again



Lipstick Apathy

a long, long time ago,
i can still remember when
i wrote a story for thunderdome
and i knew if i had my chance
i could make those readers glance
at my words and sigh, and also groan

but monday passed and tuesday left us
all with silence from the judges
no news from dear muffin
the posters all were guessin'

i can't count just how many times
i eff-fived to a promptless site
something touched me deep inside
the day, the contest died

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010



Legit Cyberpunk





Where's or jugment binch

Djeser
Mar 22, 2013


it's crow time again



i think that i shall never see
a poem fjgj

Mercedes
Mar 7, 2006

"So you Jesus?"

"And you black?"

"Nigga prove it!"

And so Black Jesus turned water into a bucket of chicken. And He saw that it was good.






dreadmojo posted:

Where's or jugment binch

Yoruichi
Sep 21, 2017


Horse Facts

True and Interesting Facts about Horse




F art

J elly

G elatinous

J ubblies

derp
Jan 21, 2010

when i get up all i want to do is go to bed again



Lipstick Apathy

when, when, surreptitious muffin
will you judge our loving stories so we know who can win
and we'll put the bloodcrown on the head of the shcmuck
singing 'this guy didn't totally suck, this guy didn't totally suck'

Anomalous Blowout
Feb 13, 2006

rock
ice
storm
abyss



It makes no attempt to sound human. It is atoms and stars.

*


derp posted:

when, when, surreptitious muffin
will you judge our loving stories so we know who can win
and we'll put the bloodcrown on the head of the shcmuck
singing 'this guy didn't totally suck, this guy didn't totally suck'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEZ-Uu55fDw

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010



Legit Cyberpunk






fyi we are in a tinkerbell scenario where we all need to shout at our web browsers until muffin knows we really truly believe in and hate him so he can wake up and judge us

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007


BLO OD E M PR E SS

of

THUDNER-DOME




dreadmojo posted:

fyi we are in a tinkerbell scenario where we all need to shout at our web browsers until muffin knows we really truly believe in and hate him so he can wake up and judge us

the kiwis are in a big hurry to see who, in the course of their rampant collusion, will be handed the blood crown with a smile and a wink

Fumblemouse
Mar 21, 2013


STANDARD
DEVIANT


Grimey Drawer

Sitting Here posted:

the kiwis are in a big hurry to see who, in the course of their rampant collusion, will be handed the blood crown with a smile and a wink

Yes. We must impatiently await the results of our collusion to discover what, precisely, we colluded to do.

Kiwi skulduggery isn't brutally effective, but at least it retains the element of surprise.

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007


BLO OD E M PR E SS

of

THUDNER-DOME




Fumblemouse posted:

Yes. We must impatiently await the results of our collusion to discover what, precisely, we colluded to do.

Kiwi skulduggery isn't brutally effective, but at least it retains the element of surprise.

I have documents

transcripts, one might say

Yoruichi
Sep 21, 2017


Horse Facts

True and Interesting Facts about Horse




Do you want to fight or what?

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007


BLO OD E M PR E SS

of

THUDNER-DOME




Yes!

Just, any time after December 1. Kiwis versus me. Anonymous submissions to an impartial (not from seattle or NZ) judge or judging team.

derp
Jan 21, 2010

when i get up all i want to do is go to bed again



Lipstick Apathy

Is there some Seattle nz rivalry that I need to be part of?

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007


BLO OD E M PR E SS

of

THUDNER-DOME




derp posted:

Is there some Seattle nz rivalry that I need to be part of?

that depends. which one are you from.

derp
Jan 21, 2010

when i get up all i want to do is go to bed again



Lipstick Apathy

Pnw, left coast best coast

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010



Legit Cyberpunk





Welcome... to hell...

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007


BLO OD E M PR E SS

of

THUDNER-DOME




derp posted:

Pnw, left coast best coast

Hmmm okay you can hate kiwis with us. Welcome aboard, fellow Cascadian!

derp
Jan 21, 2010

when i get up all i want to do is go to bed again



Lipstick Apathy

I won't let you down, unless it involves hating the muffin man, cause he writes some of the best stuff in here

Anomalous Blowout
Feb 13, 2006

rock
ice
storm
abyss



It makes no attempt to sound human. It is atoms and stars.

*


burning my cascadia flag to hoist the laser kiwi

e noho rā, suckas

cptn_dr
Sep 7, 2011

Seven for beauty that blossoms and dies



Mercedes
Mar 7, 2006

"So you Jesus?"

"And you black?"

"Nigga prove it!"

And so Black Jesus turned water into a bucket of chicken. And He saw that it was good.






East Coast best coast. gently caress you sandal wearing hippies!

flerp
Feb 25, 2014

I DON'T ALWAYS
HERDY DUR MUR FLERP FLERPITY
FLOOPIN
BUT WHEN I DO
I YER DER FLERPITY
THURN DER DERMIN
BORK! BORK! BORK!




20 new posts no results td is dead and gay

derp
Jan 21, 2010

when i get up all i want to do is go to bed again



Lipstick Apathy

Seattle is a UNESCO city of literature. Is nyc? No. No it's not.

Kaishai
Nov 3, 2010

Scoffing at modernity.

flerp posted:

20 new posts no results td is dead and gay

The dog man has a point. More interprompting, less geographic slapfighting.

SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010


:siren: Thunderdome CCCXXIV Results :siren:



What a week! I know that we’re a cavalcade of poo poo-talk here in the ‘dome, but I was pretty happy with the week we got. Even the loser wasn’t awful, it was just a good story with a terribly pretentious ending. That would be NotGordian with The Truth who set up a cool spooky dance floor and then decided that life is pain, maaaaaaaaan.

A DM goes to Yoruichi’s Don’t Go, which was a sledgehammer to the face in a week of needles under the fingernail. It also skirted the No Violence rule in a rather cheeky way that kinda felt like Yoru wanted to write a violent story and then just tacked on a twist ending fakeout.

There were a lot of HM candidates this week, and it took us some time to hammer it out. Not HMing but in contention were: His Voice, Living in a Box, Black Mold, The Buried are Waiting and Stachybotys. Who came outta that fight on top? Sebmojo and Anomalous Blowout both wrote stories about a sort of long night closing in, and strangeness from the sky, and unseen fathers who died in darkness – both stories get a well-deserved HM. From darkness to light, our last HM goes to apophenium who create a wonderfully strange and claustrophobic piece of gothic sci-fi.

Which leads us to our winner, who I must say I voted against because I didn’t want to be accused of nepotism and then he went and won anyway: congratulations to The Saddest Rhino, who got inside our heads and under our skin with a bizarre stream-of-consciousness disintegration. It's been a hell of a week, but the Halloween throne belongs to you. Take it away.

SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010


good lord what has been happening in here

Flesnolk
Apr 11, 2012

h

In.

Also, prompt.

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flerp
Feb 25, 2014

I DON'T ALWAYS
HERDY DUR MUR FLERP FLERPITY
FLOOPIN
BUT WHEN I DO
I YER DER FLERPITY
THURN DER DERMIN
BORK! BORK! BORK!




SurreptitiousMuffin posted:

good lord what has been happening in here

failing to fjgj has dire consequences

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