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Gavok
Oct 10, 2005

Brock! Oh, man, I'm sorry about your...

...tooth?


CHIKARA Pro Wrestling! It started in 2002. It got really good in 2006. It peaked around 2010. It went off a cliff in 2013. Since then, it’s chugged along, all while losing more and more of its talent due to greener pastures calling and/or because the guy in charge is screwy and cheap.

Season 18 took place in 2017 and with it came the shocking realization that there was a nine-show secret Season 17 that would be gradually released on CHIKARAtopia, the company’s streaming site. Through Season 17, we saw wrestlers debut, titles change hands, tag teams fall apart, wrestlers say farewell, and so on.

Right now, the CHIKARA Grand Champion is Juan Francisco de Coronado. An aristocrat from Ecuador, JFDC defeated fan-favorite UltraMantis Black for the title back in Season 18. Since then, he spent the remainder of the year defending against the veteran challengers. All of them failed, from Missile Assault Man to Fire Ant to Proletariat Boar to Mr. Touchdown. Dasher Hatfield appeared to be the guy primed to overthrow JFDC, but he came up short in the finale’s main event.

The tag champs are longtime CHIKARA comedy act Los Ice Creams. They won a free title match years back and finally cashed in once the Rumble Bees (Solo Darling and Travis Huckabee) won the belts from Crummels and DeFarge. Since winning the belts, Los Ice Creams have focused on interfering in any match where a tag team is close to earning three points. Can’t defend the titles if nobody qualifies for a shot!

After changing hands so many times, the Young Lions Cup title found a home with the Whisper. The cryptic villain targeted Ophidian, disgusted that despite his hypnotism powers, he never truly uses his full potential. Whisper is a master of finding out secrets and outed Ophidian as the fake 17 from several years ago, back when CHIKARA was feuding with the Flood. With Ophidian seemingly gone after losing a Sarcophagus Match to Hallowicked, Whisper took his mask and identity. The new “Ophidian” won the Rey de Voladores tournament and the Young Lions Cup. He was even going to go for the tag titles alongside a fake Amasis, but the original Ophidian returned in the form of 17 to break their arms.

Due to Hallowicked and Frightmare tearing the company apart with a failed mind-control plot and Frightmare’s tendency to thin out the roster via career-ending injuries, a lot of the CHIKARA faces got together to create a team called the Furies to keep them in check. Outside of Ophidian (who got roped into his Whisper feud), the only one who seemed to give a drat was Fire Ant, who had lost all of his insect comrades. The Furies were outright worthless outside of Fire Ant annihilating Frightmare out of revenge. The team has gone their separate ways, but Fire Ant is still super pissed.

“Juke Joint” Lucas Calhoun used to be the Flood member Volgar, but he left that life behind to be a wrestling Elvis guy. Jeremy Leary started antagonizing him and stealing his style, but it was only his way of getting through to Calhoun and showing him the truth: the two of them were “brothers,” created in a lab as soldiers for Titor Conglomerate. Calhoun left CHIKARA to do some soul-searching, but while he was gone, his longtime tag partner Missile Assault Man tried to face Leary in a singles match. Instead, a group of unnamed weirdoes appeared, as led by a goblin-like scientist identified as Professor Hugo Necodemus. He whispered something into Missile’s ear, which caused him to mindlessly walk out of the arena. Watching this, Calhoun swore that he’d return to face this threat.

Ashley Vox and Delmi Exo, the Sea Stars, wanted someone in the locker room to help give them guidance. They came up empty-handed, so they started keeping a cute girl in a shark costume named Jawsolyn in their corner. Jawsolyn was man-handled by the monster piranha hoss Merlok and shoved into a fridge. The Sea Stars ended up getting Obaryon of the Batiri as their mentor and he pushed Ashley into getting in touch with her anger. Ashley was reborn as Oceana and defeated Merlok so soundly that he ended up kneeling before her as her new servant.

In other news, NRG split up when Race Jaxon decided he was too talented and handsome to keep Hype Rockwell around. He put Hype on the shelf during the secret season, only for Hype to return in Season 18 for revenge. Their final battle was a grudge match where the loser would be forced to don a mask from now on. Now the narcissistic Race is stuck obscuring his facial features.

And that about catches us up. So what does Season 19 have for us? Interestingly enough, CHIKARA is refraining for travel and touring this year. As it is right now, there are 18 announced shows taking place in the Wrestle Factory in Philadelphia. Those shows will all be streamed live via CHIKARAtopia. The only show confirmed to be outside of the Wrestle Factory is Infinite Gauntlet, which will be in Pocono Summit.

Plus King of Trios is confirmed, but the venue has not been announced.

While their net might not be spread to wide this time around, they are going ham on their big gimmick shows:

February: National Pro Wrestling Day
March: Young Lions Cup
April: Tag World Grand Prix
May: Infinite Gauntlet
May: Aniversario
June: The Johnny Kidd Invitational
August: Chikarasaurus Rex
August/September: King of Trios
October: La Loteria Letal
November: Cibernetico

Oh, and according to the banner hanging in the Wrestle Factory, CHIKARA: Action Arcade Wrestling will be released sometime in 2018. ...So they say.

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frankenfreak
Feb 16, 2007

Almanya önde!
Bir başka hedef!
Sonsuz şef Löw için zafer!


Gavok posted:

Jawsolyn was man-handled by the monster piranha hoss Merlok and shoved into a fridge.
I know Chikara is meant to be "comic book wrestling", but c'mon Quack, you don't need to do everything the comics do.

Max Coveri
Dec 23, 2015



Remember when people gave a poo poo about Chikara?

RacistGuidingLight
Apr 5, 2009

by FactsAreUseless


Max Coveri posted:

Remember when people gave a poo poo about Chikara?

Things are better now.

SirDippingSauce
Oct 25, 2012


Gavok posted:

The Sea Stars ended up getting Obaryon of the Batiri as their mentor and he pushed Ashley into getting in touch with her anger. Ashley was reborn as Oceana and defeated Merlok so soundly that he ended up kneeling before her as her new servant.

Ok, this actually sounds pretty cool.

Mel Mudkiper
Jan 19, 2012

This is cyber bulling and I will not stand for it.


Max Coveri posted:

Remember when people gave a poo poo about Chikara?

It's still real to me dammit

ChrisBTY
Mar 29, 2012

this glorious monument


Gavok posted:

In other news, NRG split up when Race Jaxon decided he was too talented and handsome to keep Hype Rockwell around. He put Hype on the shelf during the secret season, only for Hype to return in Season 18 for revenge. Their final battle was a grudge match where the loser would be forced to don a mask from now on. Now the narcissistic Race is stuck obscuring his facial features.

Please tell me it was hyped as 'reverse lucha de apuestas'

Mel Mudkiper
Jan 19, 2012

This is cyber bulling and I will not stand for it.


Gonna be honest, losing most of the ants has hit me hard on the enthusiasm front along with jfdc holding the title for so long.

There needs to be a good face run to hype people up again

DM Punk
Aug 24, 2004


Dasher not winning the title at the end of the season was a real bummer. Would have been a Top 10 All-Time moment if he won.

Mel Mudkiper
Jan 19, 2012

This is cyber bulling and I will not stand for it.


Yeah, dasher, ophidian, or fire ant are all guys I would rather see with the title

Gavok
Oct 10, 2005

Brock! Oh, man, I'm sorry about your...

...tooth?


SirDippingSauce posted:

Ok, this actually sounds pretty cool.

Yeah, the blow-off match was really rad. They spent the entire year building up Merlok as a monster to the point that his only decisive loss came at the hands of Dasher as part of them building Dasher up as #1 contender. Then suddenly this pissed off woman dressed as Aquaman started kicking his rear end and Merlok bounced around the ring like a ping-pong ball.

ChrisBTY posted:

Please tell me it was hyped as 'reverse lucha de apuestas'

I believe right before the match, Vlad was announcing and went "Would you call this a reverse lucha de apuestas?" and Bryce just kind of shrugged.

DM Punk posted:

Dasher not winning the title at the end of the season was a real bummer. Would have been a Top 10 All-Time moment if he won.

Agreed. The one good thing about it is that he still has an automatic title shot, so they can probably do something interesting with that. He won the second Infinite Gauntlet back in the secret season, so he gets a golden opportunity. Others with golden opportunities that haven't been used are Solo Darling and Jervis Cottonb--er, I guess just Solo Darling.

BodyMassageMachine
Nov 24, 2006

EAT
SLEEP

CAAAAWWWWW
REPEAT


What’s Jervis’ deal again? He was pretty active over on Reddit for a while and had a good amount of buzz behind him, then nothing. I know there’s supposedly bad blood between him and Quack (guy behind mask spoilers?:most-current-Jervis is Kevin Condron, right? Did he move to Cali and ditch Chikara on the whole?), but I haven’t heard anything else as of late.

BodyMassageMachine fucked around with this message at Jan 10, 2018 around 21:41

coconono
Aug 11, 2004

I bet against K-1


I think Jervis's brain exploded. Or maybe someone else involved in wrestlecircus.

dsriggs
May 28, 2012

MONEY FALLS...

...FROM THE SKY...

...WHENEVER HE POSTS!


Probably something to do with Quack trademarking the Jervis mask and/or gimmick last year.

Mel Mudkiper
Jan 19, 2012

This is cyber bulling and I will not stand for it.


dsriggs posted:

Probably something to do with Quack trademarking the Jervis mask and/or gimmick last year.

other way around

Jervis left over bookings and pay and worked for other companies
Chikara is making video game with Jervis in it
Jervis demands a cut of game profits for using his likeness
Chikara responds by trademarking the gimmick since they created it
Jervis becomes Gentleman Jervis

CombineThresher
Apr 10, 2006

GIT R DONNE


Mel Mudkiper posted:

Gonna be honest, losing most of the ants has hit me hard on the enthusiasm front along with jfdc holding the title for so long.

There needs to be a good face run to hype people up again

Ultramantis leaving is what sapped a lot of my enthusiasm for the product. That, and the one thing Chikara had going for it was its sense of humor and that's been watered down a lot as talent leaves and Quack doubles down on comic book references.

El Gallinero Gros
Mar 17, 2010



CombineThresher posted:

Ultramantis leaving is what sapped a lot of my enthusiasm for the product. That, and the one thing Chikara had going for it was its sense of humor and that's been watered down a lot as talent leaves and Quack doubles down on comic book references.

For me it's a LOT of the original crew being gone, and it doesn't help that the one guy who SHOULD have left to be a indy star, Hallowicked, didn't, which just makes me sad.

I like Eddie Kingston but the man's gonna die in the ring and it's gonna be a bummer.

Panama Red
Jul 30, 2003

funky cold madiba


I'm thinking about going to the show on the 27th, which would make it my first live wrestling event ever.

(I would go to the free event in February, but I'm based in DC and want to see a NOVA Pro show on the 16th.)

Any advice for someone who has never been to a Chikara Pro show or a wrestling show? (I know the product, or at least what the product was back in the day.)

Endless Mike
Aug 13, 2003

Get running
Start pumping your bunions, I'm coming
I'm the dumbest, who flamethrow your function to Funyons
Flame your crew quicker than Trump fucks his youngest
Now face the flame fuckers your fame and fate's done with


Panama Red posted:

I'm thinking about going to the show on the 27th, which would make it my first live wrestling event ever.

(I would go to the free event in February, but I'm based in DC and want to see a NOVA Pro show on the 16th.)

Any advice for someone who has never been to a Chikara Pro show or a wrestling show? (I know the product, or at least what the product was back in the day.)

Uhhhhhhh. I don't really know what advice you would need. Go and cheer for the babyfaces and boo the heels, both of which should be fairly apparent. Don't take creepshots of lady wrestlers. Buy some merch from guys you like (if you can afford). Have fun!

Panama Red
Jul 30, 2003

funky cold madiba


Ga-doy. I meant more like, how early to arrive before belltime to get a good seat, etc. I know it's up in NE Philly which is also kind of a bitch to get to from Center City.

Mel Mudkiper
Jan 19, 2012

This is cyber bulling and I will not stand for it.


Panama Red posted:

Ga-doy. I meant more like, how early to arrive before belltime to get a good seat, etc. I know it's up in NE Philly which is also kind of a bitch to get to from Center City.

Yeah, unfortunately the Wrestle Factory is in the middle of nowhere. Easy to park, but I have no idea about public transportation.

If you want good seats, get there an hour early

However, its only about a 200 max building, so its not like you are gonna be unable to see

TV Zombie
Sep 6, 2011

Once you Whee-in, You can't Whee-out


Dinosaur Gum

So is Ophidian still dressing up as Fake 17 or is he now wearing the fake snake facial hair mask now? Also, couldn't they put someone else in the Jervis mask, have him lose and then have Chikara destroy that character just to close up that loose end.

Mel Mudkiper
Jan 19, 2012

This is cyber bulling and I will not stand for it.


TV Zombie posted:

So is Ophidian still dressing up as Fake 17 or is he now wearing the fake snake facial hair mask now? Also, couldn't they put someone else in the Jervis mask, have him lose and then have Chikara destroy that character just to close up that loose end.

they could but it would hurt the Wrestle Factory recruitment if they were told they couldn't take their gimmick with them

The only reason Chikara dropped the hammer on Jervis was because of the lawsuit

Gavok
Oct 10, 2005

Brock! Oh, man, I'm sorry about your...

...tooth?


Mel Mudkiper posted:

The only reason Chikara dropped the hammer on Jervis was because of the lawsuit

It's funny to me because the original Jervis got fired for rummaging through wallets backstage, but he still used the gimmick in the UK with apparently little issue.

Here are the four matches announced so far for the debut show, which will happen a few hours before Royal Rumble:

- Juan Francisco de Coronado defending the Grand Championship against Hype Rockwell

- "17" vs. "Ophidian"

- Oleg the Usurper vs. Kobald

- Oceanea and Merlok vs. Cajun Crawdad and Hermit Crab

Mel Mudkiper
Jan 19, 2012

This is cyber bulling and I will not stand for it.


Chikara has launched a hotline like WCW back in the day and I am either worried the company is either in serious financial trouble or quack's high concept referential stuff has finally gone too far

syzpid
Aug 9, 2014


Gavok posted:

Here are the four matches announced so far for the debut show, which will happen a few hours before Royal Rumble:

- Juan Francisco de Coronado defending the Grand Championship against Hype Rockwell

Since I was excited that the season was ending with JFdC facing Dasher (pretty much the most over face still left on the roster) and it made all the sense in the world to put the belt on him, I expect since I absolutely hate NRG that Hype Rockwell is going to win this. Because nothing can save a company like giving the title belt to a guy whose character is "one half of a reference to a jobber tag team from twenty years ago". For that matter, NRG always came off to me as a poor, poor, poor man's version of 2.0/3.0.

Alastor_the_Stylish
Jul 25, 2006

WILL AMOUNT TO NOTHING IN LIFE.



syzpid posted:

For that matter, NRG always came off to me as a poor, poor, poor man's version of 2.0/3.0.

Um, they were a direct ripoff of High Energy, Koko B. Ware and Owen Hart. 2.0 had nothing to do with it.

Gavok
Oct 10, 2005

Brock! Oh, man, I'm sorry about your...

...tooth?


So DUSTIN and Chuck Taylor TM are now in the alumni section with Chuck TM's Twitter now deleted. Not too surprising.

What doesn't seem to make much sense is that Quack and Bryce are also in the alumni section.

Mel Mudkiper
Jan 19, 2012

This is cyber bulling and I will not stand for it.


There is not gonna be a single non wrestle factory talent huh

syzpid
Aug 9, 2014


Alastor_the_Stylish posted:

Um, they were a direct ripoff of High Energy, Koko B. Ware and Owen Hart. 2.0 had nothing to do with it.

syzpid posted:

character is "one half of a reference to a jobber tag team from twenty years ago".

I was a big fan of High Energy as a kid, and it was nice to see it referenced, maybe for the first month or two? But the team first showed up at the end of 2014. I was saying on top of being based on High Energy, they also felt like a poor man's version of 2.0. I mean the energy drink was a running bit for what felt like a whole season. Ironically enough 2.0 had their issues with Chikara (and personal issues) which caused them to mostly drop out of Chikara at the end of 2014.

Alastor_the_Stylish
Jul 25, 2006

WILL AMOUNT TO NOTHING IN LIFE.



syzpid posted:

I was a big fan of High Energy as a kid, and it was nice to see it referenced, maybe for the first month or two? But the team first showed up at the end of 2014. I was saying on top of being based on High Energy, they also felt like a poor man's version of 2.0. I mean the energy drink was a running bit for what felt like a whole season. Ironically enough 2.0 had their issues with Chikara (and personal issues) which caused them to mostly drop out of Chikara at the end of 2014.

I see. I thought you meant that he was based on one half of a jobber tag team as in The Model Rick Martel.

CombineThresher
Apr 10, 2006

GIT R DONNE


Gavok posted:

So DUSTIN and Chuck Taylor TM are now in the alumni section with Chuck TM's Twitter now deleted. Not too surprising.

What doesn't seem to make much sense is that Quack and Bryce are also in the alumni section.

Chucky T/DUSTIN was the last lingering thread of my interest in the company, so I guess I'm done if they've stopped booking him.

Which is weird, because I thought he helped book Chikara.

Gavok
Oct 10, 2005

Brock! Oh, man, I'm sorry about your...

...tooth?


Tomorrow is National Pro Wrestling Day, which I probably won't be able to watch because I'm in the middle of a move. This year they're raising money for Puerto Rico. Matches are as follows:

- Juan Francisco defending the Grand Championship against Oleg the Usurper. At the last show, JFDC retained against Hype Rockwell while Oleg finished off his long-running angle with Kobald while gaining his third point.

- Los Ice Creams defending the tag titles against the Closers. Rick Rolland came back from injury at the end of the last season and between that and a four corner tag match, the Closers earned three points. Pretty sure they're the first tag team to earn three points since Los Ice Creams won the titles, since they've been so good at screwing with contenders and ruining their momentum.

- Ophidian vs. Frightmare: Ophidian took back his identity from the Whisper and now wants to finally get his revenge on Frightmare for the whole "beating Amasis in a mask vs. mask match and getting him to leave Chikara" thing.

- The Beach Bums vs. Crummels and Defarge: guest team vs. house team to earn a spot in Tag World Grand Prix.

- Proletariat Boar of Moldova vs. BLANK: BLANK is the crazed new persona for Race Jaxon, who is now forced to wear a white gimp mask. At the season premiere, he publicly challenged the Boar for whatever reason.

- Xyberhawx 2000 vs. Penelope Ford and Joey Janella: See Beach Bums vs. Crummels/Defarge.

- Rory Gulak vs. Gran Akuma: Akuma's been beating the crap out of the new guys, even when Travis Huckabee fairly defeated him. Last I checked, Gulak was heel, but who knows where this will go.

- The Whisper defending the Young Lions Cup against Tony Deppen: I have no idea who Deppen is.

OGB
Aug 13, 2003

Tingly.

Found it interesting that CHIKARA doesn't seem to have a Mania weekend show booked, even with Quack down there.

Gavok
Oct 10, 2005

Brock! Oh, man, I'm sorry about your...

...tooth?


Gavok posted:

- Rory Gulak vs. Gran Akuma: Akuma's been beating the crap out of the new guys, even when Travis Huckabee fairly defeated him. Last I checked, Gulak was heel, but who knows where this will go.

Er, never mind.

El Gallinero Gros
Mar 17, 2010



Gavok posted:

Er, never mind.

If there's one thing that I dislike about Drew Gulak being a WWE contracted guy, it's that the backup plan can't be Drew and Rory doing their shtick. Holy poo poo do I love the Amazing Gulak Brothers, what a dopey but fun gimmick

syzpid
Aug 9, 2014


Gavok posted:

Tomorrow is National Pro Wrestling Day, which I probably won't be able to watch because I'm in the middle of a move. This year they're raising money for Puerto Rico. Matches are as follows:

- Juan Francisco defending the Grand Championship against Oleg the Usurper. At the last show, JFDC retained against Hype Rockwell while Oleg finished off his long-running angle with Kobald while gaining his third point.

Mr Bones Wild Ride never ends.

Also JFDC will be champion forever. We can't escape.

Gavok
Oct 10, 2005

Brock! Oh, man, I'm sorry about your...

...tooth?


Yeah, looks like Oleg vs. Kobald has stretched into Oleg vs. House of Rot. Also, Fire Ant is now furious at Ophidian for pretending to be 17 during the Flood storyline. Speculation is that Ophidian revealed himself by saving the life of Frightmare when everyone would have been better off if he stayed out of it.

The Closers are the tag champs now, having handily taken down Los Ice Creams.

In other news...

https://twitter.com/ProteusWheel/st...804730625568769

Mel Mudkiper
Jan 19, 2012

This is cyber bulling and I will not stand for it.


There's also a new ant

yay new ant

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frankenfreak
Feb 16, 2007

Almanya önde!
Bir başka hedef!
Sonsuz şef Löw için zafer!


CHIKARA Season 19: We're Back to two Ants

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