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BEST KONG
This poll is closed.
Donkey Kong 76 6.13%
Diddie Kong 75 6.05%
Dixie Kong 84 6.77%
Lankey Kong 129 10.40%
Funky Kong 189 15.24%
Mario 198 15.97%
Tiny Kony 65 5.24%
Candy Kong 61 4.92%
Chunky Kong 89 7.18%
Cranky Kong 125 10.08%
Wrinkley Kong (R.I.P.) 149 12.02%
Total: 719 votes
[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

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Random Stranger
Nov 27, 2009




SoftNum posted:

OK it's bothering me. Is that his tonker at the bottom?

I think it's obvious by now that PJ gets a sexual thrill from breaking equipment.

It's pretty obviously a finger.

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Worldshatter
May 7, 2015

PEPSI for TV-GAME





I have poo poo to do this week but lol if I amn't going to shirk as much as possible to get my speedrun dosage

beep by grandpa
May 5, 2004



no lie my productivity at work goes down a good 80% during GDQ weeks

beep by grandpa
May 5, 2004



Mods, please ban everyone who didn't vote Funky Kong.

Coheed and Camembert
Feb 11, 2012


Super hyped for the Metal Gear Solid and Snake Eater block, I always enjoy watching those runs. Bad week for classes to start again, but some great games this week.

SoftNum
Mar 31, 2011



beep by grandpa posted:

Mods, please ban everyone who voted Funky Kong.

mandatory lesbian
Dec 18, 2012


i hope to see a day kong-lovers of every stripe can come together in harmony

except kiddie kong, anyone who likes him can gently caress off

Cory in the Blouse
Oct 22, 2010

SAMUS ARAN
OUR ONLY HOPE!


beep by grandpa posted:

Mods, please ban everyone who didn't vote Funky Kong.

Funky Kong was known as the "Brown Baron" for being the greatest pilot in the war, though he lost his tail after General Klump shot him down during a dog fight. This is why many people believe Funky Kong is an ape, but he is actually half monkey, half ape due to dominate genes from Donkey Kong Jr., his father, and recessive genes from an unknown female monkey for a mother. Funky's involvement in the war could be the reason why he has various types of weapons for sale and has different ammo for each of the said weapons.


Funky in Donkey Kong 64, in his army attire.

Source: The Donkey Kong Wiki

Worldshatter
May 7, 2015

PEPSI for TV-GAME





Cranky Kong for life mofos

beep by grandpa
May 5, 2004



I will loving fight all of you

Dias
Feb 20, 2011



I SURVIVED THE AWFUL BLOCK, AGDQ 2018


The only good Kong is a dead Kong. Mario was right.

Nep-Nep
May 15, 2004

Don't forget to check Desert Palace your inventory!


I voted Wrinkly because she never called me an entitled millennial.

Random Stranger
Nov 27, 2009



beep by grandpa posted:

Mods, please ban everyone who didn't vote Funky Kong.

You misspelled "Cranky Kong".



I thought we were saving explaining the Great Ape War for when the marathon was live.

Thursday Next
Jan 11, 2004

FUCK THE ISLE OF APPLES. FUCK THEM IN THEIR STUPID ASSES.

hay guise is this the thread where video games

Dias
Feb 20, 2011



I SURVIVED THE AWFUL BLOCK, AGDQ 2018


Thursday Next posted:

hay guise is this the thread where video games

no mods allowed this is a fun zone

DoctorStrangelove
Jun 6, 2012

IT WOULD NOT BE DIFFICULT MEIN FUHRER!



beep by grandpa posted:

I will loving fight all of you

You really wanna step to the King of DAIKATANA?

The Lobster
Sep 3, 2011

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I'm bummed because I ordered a pizza about an hour ago and I specified gluten free (because Celiac) and it arrived and it was, like, an inside out pizza. I called the pizza place and they were like, "You didn't want it Chicago style?" No, I wanted it gluten free, like I said, and like you repeated back to me at least one time. They're remaking it but it hasn't come yet so I'm hungry and grumpy. And I have a pizza I can't use. I hope this doesn't happen during the marathon proper.

Edit: That said any goon in NW West Virginia/SE Ohio can have a free pizza.

The Lobster fucked around with this message at Jan 7, 2018 around 01:05

Doorknob Slobber
Sep 10, 2006





The Lobster posted:

I'm bummed because I ordered a pizza about an hour ago and I specified gluten free (because Celiac) and it arrived and it was, like, an inside out pizza. I called the pizza place and they were like, "You didn't want it Chicago style?" No, I wanted it gluten free, like I said, and like you repeated back to me at least one time. They're remaking it but it hasn't come yet so I'm hungry and grumpy. And I have a pizza I can't use. I hope this doesn't happen during the marathon proper.

Edit: That said any goon in NW West Virginia/SE Ohio can have a free pizza.

i wish i could eat your chicago pizza for you

Random Stranger
Nov 27, 2009



DoctorStrangelove posted:

You really wanna step to the King of DAIKATANA?

Can confirm. Strangelove is the 2017 Daikatana World Champion.

beep by grandpa
May 5, 2004



An atheist was walking through the woods. "What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!" he said to himself.

As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.

He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him. He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing in on him.

He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer.

He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him,reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him.

At that instant the Atheist cried out, "Oh my God!"

Time stopped. The bear froze. The forest was silent.

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky.

"You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident."

"Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?"

The atheist looked directly into the light, "It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?"

"Very well," said the voice.

The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed.

And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head and spoke:

"Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen."

Corek
May 11, 2013

by R. Guyovich


beep by grandpa posted:

An atheist was walking through the woods. "What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!" he said to himself.

As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.

He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him. He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing in on him.

He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer.

He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him,reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him.

At that instant the Atheist cried out, "Oh my God!"

Time stopped. The bear froze. The forest was silent.

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky.

"You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident."

"Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?"

The atheist looked directly into the light, "It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?"

"Very well," said the voice.

The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed.

And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head and spoke:

"Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen."

Actual description of the Animorphs game

Thursday Next
Jan 11, 2004

FUCK THE ISLE OF APPLES. FUCK THEM IN THEIR STUPID ASSES.

what if video games, but fast

(I am very excited to be here poasting with you goons at another GDQ)

DoctorStrangelove
Jun 6, 2012

IT WOULD NOT BE DIFFICULT MEIN FUHRER!



Corek posted:

Actual description of the Animorphs game

im reporting you for racism against people of animorphology.

Insurrectionist
May 21, 2007


had the week off and of course I'm busy again starting monday f m l

at least I can watch the rest of the time

Corek
May 11, 2013

by R. Guyovich


DoctorStrangelove posted:

im reporting you for racism against people of animorphology.

There were literally 54 animorphs books and a new one came out every month as a way to extort children

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Animorphs_books

The Lobster
Sep 3, 2011

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Corek posted:

There were literally 54 animorphs books and a new one came out every month as a way to extort children

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Animorphs_books

Wrong. There were 64 Animorphs books. Poser.

mandatory lesbian
Dec 18, 2012


lol the last like 20 books, except the very last 2, are all ghostwritten

k.a. applegate dngaf

Soup du Jour
Sep 8, 2011

I always knew I'd die with a headache.


I better not be hearing any shittalking of the Animorphs books in this thread

Brother Entropy
Dec 27, 2009

Forreal, call me 'Zelda' in front of my crew again and you're going back in the barrel.



mandatory lesbian posted:

lol the last like 20 books, except the very last 2, are all ghostwritten

k.a. applegate dngaf

really? drat, even as a little kid i somehow knew when a series was worth giving up on

ThePagey
Sep 18, 2016
Yes, this is my real hair

Finally throwing off my lurker status so I can enjoy the quality shitposting these threads provide.

Speaking of, who wants to vote on how many days it'll be before someone makes a death threat on camera? I'm guessing Tuesday.

beep by grandpa
May 5, 2004



Who else horny for speed runs rn don't be shy

The Lobster
Sep 3, 2011

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Brother Entropy posted:

really? drat, even as a little kid i somehow knew when a series was worth giving up on

Harsh. They've all been uploaded online. I quit reading when I hit 7th grade and Animorphs were "uncool" but a few years ago I went back and reread them all* and it was actually pretty good. I particularly liked the Chronicles books.

*barring the Alternamorphs monstrosities

beep by grandpa
May 5, 2004



I am Rock. loving. HARD.

screw the haters and fanboys!!!...

Xenothral
Aug 1, 2013

No one's left... Everything's gone...! Zebes is burning!



beep by grandpa posted:

Who else horny for speed runs rn don't be shy




(I am)

Brother Entropy
Dec 27, 2009

Forreal, call me 'Zelda' in front of my crew again and you're going back in the barrel.



The Lobster posted:

Harsh. They've all been uploaded online. I quit reading when I hit 7th grade and Animorphs were "uncool" but a few years ago I went back and reread them all* and it was actually pretty good. I particularly liked the Chronicles books.

*barring the Alternamorphs monstrosities

sorry bub i'm an adult now and don't have that kind of time to waste on childish things

[considers taking an unpaid day off work just to watch speedruns on whichever day has the best runs i'd miss]

beep by grandpa
May 5, 2004



This is all of us tonight and the rest of this week...and it makes me so happy...


This is for you guys...from me...this is how I feel when I post with u all and I hope u feel the same about your favourite poster (me)

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Xenothral
Aug 1, 2013

No one's left... Everything's gone...! Zebes is burning!



beep by grandpa posted:

This is all of us tonight and the rest of this week...and it makes me so happy...


This is for you guys...from me...this is how I feel when I post with u all and I hope u feel the same about your favourite poster (me)



These threads are always warm and fuzzy and I love them (And all of you)

DizzyBum
Apr 16, 2007




beep by grandpa posted:

This is all of us tonight and the rest of this week...and it makes me so happy...


This is for you guys...from me...this is how I feel when I post with u all and I hope u feel the same about your favourite poster (me)



GO TEAM GOON

Regy Rusty
Apr 26, 2010



Grimey Drawer

beep by grandpa posted:

Mods, please ban everyone who didn't vote Funky Kong.

I voted for Cranky

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The Lobster
Sep 3, 2011

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Brother Entropy posted:

sorry bub i'm an adult now and don't have that kind of time to waste on childish things

[considers taking an unpaid day off work just to watch speedruns on whichever day has the best runs i'd miss]

is understandable


beep by grandpa posted:

This is all of us tonight and the rest of this week...and it makes me so happy...


This is for you guys...from me...this is how I feel when I post with u all and I hope u feel the same about your favourite poster (me)



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