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Hello friends! Have you heard the good news? Piss tape is real! Better than that, I had too much time and money on my hands and designed a hat to spread the gospel of the Piss Tape. The bad news is that the good folks over at Custom Ink had a minimum of 12 per order. That means I may have some extras. Specifically, I have 9 extras. I refuse to make money off of this, despite literally paying for 12 hats so that I can have one. They're my hats, so I already assigned 5 of the hats to various C-SPAM posters based on my own arbitrary preferences. To those who are already getting a free hat, congratulations! To the rest of you, I guess I just don't like you or your posts as much as those folks. You should have done better. All hope is not lost, though! I have four extra hats and I want to give them out in as entertaining a way as possible. Credit to Joementum for suggesting a Sheep Game as a way of deciding how to hand out the remaining hats. These hats are absolutely free, I will not accept any money for them and I will pay all of the costs to package and deliver them. The only cost for playing this game is your pride and some of the fleeting minutes you have remaining before we're all consumed in a Diet Coke-fueled nuclear holocaust. Well, that and the fact that if you win a hat you'll have to tell me where to ship it, ostensibly giving a weird guy from the internet your shipping address. How do I play a Sheep Game? I will ask a series of inane questions. Anyone interested in playing will email hats.for.sheep@gmail.com with their SA Username and their answers. Please do not PM me your answers. I promise I will count any entry sent to the email address. I reserve the right to arbitrarily reject or accept entries delivered via PM, depending on my mood and the quality of your entry. I just have to answer your stupid questions? But then how do I win? Entries are scored by how popular the total answers are among all other contestants. For instance, let's say one question is "Which fluid is in the tape?" If you answer "Piss" but all the other posters answer "Lemonade" then you get no points, despite the fact that you are right and they are wrong. However, if five other posters also say "Piss" then you get five points for that question. So do they. Your goal is to guess what answers will be the most popular. Whichever entry gets the most total points wins and gets a free hat. If there's a tie I'll figure out some sort of tiebreaker but let's ignore that for now. I thought you said you had four extra hats I do! Let's add a twist or two to this Sheep Game. In the spirit of the 45th President of the United States, let's celebrate failing upwards. Whoever has the lowest Sheep Game score will have Shot the Moon and also get a free hat. Important note: Because of this rule all answers must be actual, valid submissions for the questions to qualify for Shooting the Moon. If you just answer "Piss Tape" for all questions your entry will not count towards a Shoot the Moon attempt. Invalid answers do not disqualify you from any other potential hat wins, they only disqualify you from Shooting the Moon. E: Squizzle posted:im not sure how you can disqualify invalid answers when the game is about one Pancakes posted:Fair enough, I'll do my best to allow most "invalid" answers as long as it's not a clear attempt at tanking to shoot the moon. That leaves two more free hats Threads are more fun if people are posting in them. I don't want to see my free hat thread empty, devoid of content or posts. Lobby for your favorite possible answers in the thread. This helps you in two ways: 1. You might persuade other posters to post your preferred answer, increasing your score. 2. Once the Sheep Game is over I will pick my favorite lobbying post from the thread. That poster will get a free hat. My decision is arbitrary and final. Make funny posts, make lovely posts, make effort posts, just post a gif for your suggested answer. I have no idea how I'll decide which is best. That still leaves one more extra hat. Once all the entries are received I'll assign each one a number and run a random number generator. The owner of the winning entry gets a hat. The universe is a cruel and random place, but some lucky goon will be given a free hat just by being assigned a random number. The Questions 1. Who is the best pre-Trump US President? 2. What is the best non-US country in the world currently recognized by the UN as of 1/12/2018? Note: This question carefully-worded in case Trump reduces a country to ash between now and when the game ends. 3. Who is the best justice currently sitting on the Supreme Court of the United States as of 1/12/2018? Note: This question carefully-worded because SCOTUS has some old, old people sitting. 4. What is the best majority opinion issued by the Supreme Court of the United States? 5. What is the saltiest dissenting opinion issued by a justice of the Supreme Court of the United States? 6. Who has been the best Pope in the history of the Catholic Church? 7. What is the best of the 50 United States of America? 8. What comic book character is most similar to Trump? 9. Which of Trump's children is the best? 10. What is the greatest Trump Tweet prior to 1/12/2018? 11. Which character from King of the Hill is most like Trump? 12. Which MLB player, living or dead, would Trump hate the most? 13. What is the worst of all Star Wars movies that received a wide release in theaters? 14. Which current world leader is most likely to invite Trump to their birthday party? 15. What breed of dog is Trump most likely to adopt as a White House pet to try to make him more "caring"? Miscellaneous Extras 1. The game will remain open until 1/22/2018. 2. People who have already gotten a free hat are welcome to enter the Sheep Game. If I like you or your posts enough to just give you a free hat then you're more than welcome to try for a second. 3. Winners of the Sheep Game are not limited to one hat. If you win the Sheep Game you can also win an additional hat via making my favorite post in the thread or via the random number generator. Pancakes has issued a correction as of 18:51 on Jan 12, 2018 |
# ? Jan 12, 2018 05:15 |
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# ? Apr 23, 2024 22:54 |
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i dont care about whatever nerd poo poo you're talking about gently caress you (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST) (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 05:26 |
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Peanut President posted:i dont care about whatever nerd poo poo you're talking about gently caress you (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST) (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 05:48 |
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Peanut President posted:i dont care about whatever nerd poo poo you're talking about gently caress you lol owned
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 07:21 |
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Sheng-Ji Yang posted:lol owned if you strike me down i shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 07:27 |
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There were presidents pre trump?
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 08:41 |
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wake up sheeple
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 08:48 |
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piss
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 09:09 |
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this thread is good and perfect and i will not abide knavery, rapscallionism, or scoundrelment in it
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 14:59 |
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i sdent you a post op. it will answer all your questions. the piss tape is real.
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 16:08 |
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Interesting tidbit: There are 4 entries so far and every single entry has a different justice listed for #3. I specifically put that one in there to make sure some questions were going to have crossover, since a lot of them (SCOTUS opinions and dissents, for instance) are kind of out there.
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 16:16 |
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Jeb!
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 18:24 |
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10. What is the greatest Trump Tweet prior to 1/12/2018? These questions. They are unanswerable.
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 18:27 |
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Peanut President posted:i dont care about whatever nerd poo poo you're talking about gently caress you super rude... i like what u did op so i just wanted to pass that on and the design is great...i just don't wear hats and yellow really isn't my colour
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 18:29 |
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im not sure how you can disqualify invalid answers when the game is about one
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 18:46 |
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Squizzle posted:im not sure how you can disqualify invalid answers when the game is about one Fair enough, I'll do my best to allow most "invalid" answers as long as it's not a clear attempt at tanking to shoot the moon.
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 18:50 |
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Pancakes posted:Fair enough, I'll do my best to allow most "invalid" answers as long as it's not a clear attempt at tanking to shoot the moon. disagree, but then again I just effortposted to poo poo the moon with all valid answers. what happens when multiple people all have zero points? now i'm bound to lose b/c all of my answers are within the realm of possibility
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 19:06 |
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Yossarian-22 posted:disagree, but then again I just effortposted to poo poo the moon with all valid answers. what happens when multiple people all have zero points? now i'm bound to lose b/c all of my answers are within the realm of possibility I'll figure out a tiebreaker if it comes to that. Maybe whoever has the most impressive shoot the moon entry. Also, I can confirm that you are not going to have zero points. We have our first match on SCOTUS justices you sick bastards.
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 19:10 |
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How much does 12 PissHats cost nowadays?
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 19:11 |
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I've also got a sheep game going in filthy D&D proper, come and win glorious nothing! https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3845479
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 19:32 |
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Yossarian-22 posted:Jeb!
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# ? Jan 12, 2018 19:42 |
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I need the hat to complete the ensemble Serfer has issued a correction as of 03:56 on Jan 13, 2018 |
# ? Jan 13, 2018 03:34 |
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well, h-here i go
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# ? Jan 13, 2018 03:59 |
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also, it's clearly Buck Strickland
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# ? Jan 13, 2018 04:04 |
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Misogynice Job! posted:also, it's clearly Buck Strickland on the surface but if you dig deeper you’ll see it’s khan
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# ? Jan 13, 2018 04:06 |
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Misogynice Job! posted:also, it's clearly Cotton Hill FTFY
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 19:05 |
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sent. I entered like the d&d sheep game so it’s 15 lines with no numbers hope that’s cool
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 20:51 |
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Misogynice Job! posted:also, it's clearly Buck Strickland 100% bill
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 20:52 |
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CustomInk has emailed me saying I can get a discount on future orders if I get a group shot with my merchandise. I feel like this could be a poor decision on their part.El Mero Mero posted:FTFY AHM THE PREZ'DINT OF FIDDY STATES
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# ? Jan 15, 2018 02:04 |
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nazi, nazi popes, don't ever change
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# ? Jan 15, 2018 17:04 |
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I PM'd everyone I could who'd expressed an interest in the hats but hadn't entered the contest yet (that I could remember anyway); I want to be sure people who like the idea of a free terrible hat get a chance. We're at 12 entries so far with a week to go. E: Scoring a Sheep Game halfway through is kind of pointless but for those curious, the current lead is 22 points, narrowly ahead of two entries at 21 points apiece. One entry still has an impressive 0 points, while two other attempts at shooting the moon are at 2 points apiece. The almost-shooting-the-moon entries got tripped up by other posters, not one another. One got points from a SCOTUS justice, the other got points from a Star Wars movie. Pancakes has issued a correction as of 19:33 on Jan 15, 2018 |
# ? Jan 15, 2018 18:40 |
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pope paul II is said to have died of a heart attack "whilst being sodomized by a page boy", just gonna throw that out there
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# ? Jan 15, 2018 23:56 |
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pfft no thank you, I like popes that didn’t die
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# ? Jan 16, 2018 01:01 |
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okay, lets do it
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# ? Jan 16, 2018 01:21 |
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I'd just like everyone to know that there is a correct answer for saltiest opinion.
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# ? Jan 16, 2018 04:57 |
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i have submitted my really really really really really dumb answers if someone comes up with the same answers i have for some of them, i will be shocked
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# ? Jan 16, 2018 08:06 |
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Is everyone's points total gonna be posted at the end?
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# ? Jan 16, 2018 19:43 |
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BrownieMinusEye posted:Is everyone's points total gonna be posted at the end? Yep. I almost posted to-date point totals yesterday but realized that much information midway through a sheep game could make it unfair.
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# ? Jan 16, 2018 20:07 |
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I'mma use this post to lobby for you to send one to Ashley Feinberg. If I win, you're sending my hat to her.
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# ? Jan 17, 2018 01:04 |
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# ? Apr 23, 2024 22:54 |
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redneck nazgul posted:i have submitted my really really really really really dumb answers This was a really strong Shoot the Moon entry that also knocked the previously-perfect shoot-the-moon entry out of zero points, just FYI. PostNouveau posted:I'mma use this post to lobby for you to send one to Ashley Feinberg. You're lobbying in the thread more than most people are, so you've got that going for you. Six new entries since I updated last. Some statistical tidbits after 18 entries: For question 3: Of the 9 living SCOTUS justices only 5 have been picked. You Shoot the Moon folks think too much alike. For question 9: Every single one of Trump's children has been picked. For question 13: Of the 9 Star Wars movies that have had wide releases in theaters, 8 of them have been picked.
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# ? Jan 17, 2018 01:32 |