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The Dennis System
Aug 4, 2014



Zazi posted:

with a love that will echo through the ages

P.S. - I'm gay.

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Mokbek
Dec 19, 2014

STOP KICKING ME IN THE WEINER


*A fart*

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008



Grimey Drawer

Tinfoil Papercut posted:

"I love you"

(said 12 minutes into 2nd date)

gently caress

Sole.Sushi
Feb 19, 2008

Seaweed!? Get the fuck out!


I'm into some weird poo poo; so if you could eat this rainbow cake and chug this entire bottle of laxative, that'd be great.

Best Bi Geek Squid
Mar 25, 2016


Ponies Ist Krieg posted:

Thanks, I'm asexual now

Then make a point to be seen by her with your new gurl a month later

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

IN THE GRIM BARKNESS
OF THE FUTURE
THERE ARE ONLY DOGS


Clapping Larry

I think we both knew this was only meant to be short-term (for use on your 25th anniversary)

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

IN THE GRIM BARKNESS
OF THE FUTURE
THERE ARE ONLY DOGS


Clapping Larry

Iím gonna be perfectly honest with you here: Iím a secret agent and my new assignment is going to make impossible for me to communicate with you for the next ten years.

spleen merchant
Jul 1, 2007


You can keep having sex with him whenever you want - just don't leave me please!

Alucard
Mar 11, 2002


I'm Chris Hansen with Dateline NBC

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

IN THE GRIM BARKNESS
OF THE FUTURE
THERE ARE ONLY DOGS


Clapping Larry

Take my life... PLEASE!

Barudak
May 7, 2007

No no, I'm Sean Mexico. You must have me mistaken for someone else.

Im sorry this relationship has to end Manuel, or should I say Gustavo his secret twin brother presumed dead in a tragic boating accident 15 years ago?!?

ikanreed
Sep 25, 2009

Rise and shine, master leprechaun.


If you leave me I'll kill myself.

Repeat until they want you dead

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

The door blew shut but here's the deal
Dreams are lies, it's the dreaming that's real


Hey, I found my old meme collection from high school! Let me show you!

Super Waffle
Sep 25, 2007

I'm a hermaphrodite and my parents (40K nerds) named me Slaanesh, THANKS MOM

you're gay

Creed Reunion Tour
Jul 3, 2007


Grimey Drawer

When we started going out I didn't know you had a hotter identical twin.

ikanreed
Sep 25, 2009

Rise and shine, master leprechaun.


Let me preface what I'm about to say: a threesome with your two grandmothers is not weird

EX250 Type R
Mar 7, 2013



https://www.teamdan69.com


yeah heres a tip for you, dont be a hooker

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002


my cum is tainted

ikanreed
Sep 25, 2009

Rise and shine, master leprechaun.


Chief McHeath posted:

my cum is tainted

My taint is cummed

Grevling
Dec 18, 2016


I like you, but I feel like I could get somebody hotter.

Imperialist Dog
Oct 21, 2008

"I think you could better spend your time on finishing your editing before the deadline today."
\


(mumble) I said, DO YOU HAVE STAIRS IN YOUR HOUSE

macdonal hamborkles
Mar 29, 2010
text

Imperialist Dog posted:

(mumble) I said, DO YOU HAVE STAIRS IN YOUR HOUSE

Icochet
Mar 18, 2008


I heard you take a dump, things can never be the same.

Fredrik1
Jan 22, 2005

Gopherslayer


Fallen Rib

It's you, not me

OMGVBFLOL
Dec 20, 2003
Probation
Can't post for 7 days!


Noblesse Obliged posted:

I've decided to jump into online dating over you

brutal

Cough Drop The Beat
Jan 22, 2012

It's your HPV, Veronica. I'm just carrying it.

I tried being pegged by your wife but I'm just really not into it.

Yeslah
Apr 2, 2013


We're breaking up, I'm positive; HIV positive.

Frankenstyle
Dec 3, 2005

Mmmm, You smell like Lysol Wipes.


I once told a girl that was wondering if things were getting too serious too quickly, "If I wanted a friend, I'd buy a dog". I thought I meant it as a joke, but right as it came out I realized I wasn't joking and so did she. So I just left and that was that.

gleebster
Dec 16, 2006

Only a howler

I'm moving to Manitoba.

(If in Manitoba, say Wyoming).

Papa Emeritus III
Jul 7, 2017

Come together. Together as one.

*serves Restraining Order*

Bye.

a peck of pickled peckers
Aug 3, 2014



Iíd like to show you my SA post history.

Ralph Hurley
Aug 3, 2009



Look, you guys have a good time frig-dancin'. And Barb, your scalloped potatoes are hosed

SCROTO TURBOSPERG
Jan 21, 2007

Suck the shit out of my own asshole, please

Mushika
Dec 22, 2010



I'm 43 and you're a body pillow with image of an anime schoolgirl printed on it and I want a divorce.

OMGVBFLOL
Dec 20, 2003
Probation
Can't post for 7 days!


im an anime body pillow and iíve taken my things and left while you were at work. iíve changed all my email addresses and gotten a new phone. donít try to contact me or iíll call the police

Obsidianheart
Apr 25, 2017

Throwing off the shadow of a better man.

Say "Goin' out for milk and cigarettes," and then just never go back.


*Works best if you don't smoke.

Dolphin
Dec 5, 2008


I'm gonna give you up, let you down, run around and desert you, make you cry, say goodbye, and hurt you.

Streak
May 16, 2004

SUCK

THE

SHIT

STRAIGHT

OUT

OF

MY

OWN
ASSHOLE


Reddit said this is best for both of us

mind the walrus
Sep 22, 2006

Light city
Bright streets

I'm not married to the sea, but I'll learn

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Julius CSAR
Oct 3, 2007

Trust Me


biznitch you later, skater!

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