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UP THE BUM NO BABY
Sep 1, 2011

by Hand Knit


EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:

Advice on getting an MFA: don't, die alone in your parents' basement.

Clearly American, the Russian would advise getting drunk and writing sheer depression before committing suicide.

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Smiling Jack
Dec 2, 2001

I sucked a dick for bus fare and then I walked home.



UP THE BUM NO BABY posted:

Clearly American, the Russian would advise getting drunk and writing sheer depression before committing suicide.

yeah but he wouldn't have gotten a MFA

Slim Pickens
Jan 12, 2007



Grimey Drawer

Da it's me, the American Johnny Hamburger! I love the baseball! Yankees is best!

UP THE BUM NO BABY
Sep 1, 2011

by Hand Knit


It's raining dogs and cats out there

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers







UP THE BUM NO BABY posted:

It's raining dogs and cats out there

We eat tonight!

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

What, Me Worry?


Good luck.

mods changed my name
Oct 30, 2017


I am literally typing this as i piss

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers








ALBANIAN SPOTTED

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

What, Me Worry?


Slavic Crime Yacht posted:

ALBANIAN SPOTTED

Great Escape dude, the train

Naked Bear
Apr 15, 2007

Boners was recorded before a studio audience that was alive!


Aw, gently caress, how did I miss this?

Naked Bear
Apr 15, 2007

Boners was recorded before a studio audience that was alive!


Is it too late? gently caress it, I'M GOING IN, BOYS.

Zeris
Apr 15, 2003

Quality posting direct from my brain to your face holes.

Ok I'm going through the answers now. Wow, you people are bad at following directions.


edit:I stopped replying to the emails that didn't follow directions, so I'll tell you here - if you didn't format your answers like I said to, I didn't count your entry. You're welcome to resubmit in the next 24 hours with the right version.

Zeris fucked around with this message at 03:44 on Feb 7, 2018

UP THE BUM NO BABY
Sep 1, 2011

by Hand Knit


USA! USA! USA!

Syrian Lannister
Aug 25, 2007

Oh, did I kill him too?
I've been a very busy little man.




Sugartime Jones

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers







https://youtu.be/lDQ7hXMLxGc

Terrible Robot
Jul 2, 2010

FRIED CHICKEN


Slippery Tilde

lol jesus gently caress

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

What, Me Worry?


Is always being cold in Siberia.

Zeris
Apr 15, 2003

Quality posting direct from my brain to your face holes.

Ok done.

In some cases, a second-most-popular answer will be tallied. Let's do winners, prizes, and losers later today.

1. Who is the best pre-Trump US President?
  • Popular answer: Three-way tie between FDR, Teddy Roosevelt, and Lincoln (2 pts)
  • Runner up: N/A
2. What is the worst political party in the history (or present) of the United States?
  • Popular answer: The whig party (3 pts)
  • Runner up: Tea party (2 pts)
3. How many current members of congress (on 1/15/2018) are military veterans?
  • Popular answer: Between 98 and 100 (3 pts)
  • Runner up: Between 81 and 83 (2 pts)
4. Is the United States Marine Corps its own branch of service, or a part of the Navy?
  • Popular answer: No (8 pts)
  • Runner up: Obsolete / anachronism / department of crayola (3 pts lol)
5. How many editions of the dick art book have been published?
  • Popular answer: Two (8 pts)
  • Runner up: Three (2 pts)
6. Who is the patron saint of GIP?
  • Popular answer: Freddie Mercury (4 pts)
  • Runner up: N/A
7. Which MRE makes you poo poo you pants?
  • Popular answer: Jambalaya (6 pts)
  • Runner up: N/A
8. Who is the collectively most hated mod of GIP?
  • Popular answer: Grover (9 pts)
  • Runner up: Ralp (2 pts)
9. What year did GIP become its own subforum?
  • Popular answer: If you managed to write a number, you get 8 pts.
  • Runner up: If writing a number was too hard, you get 0 pts.
10. Which regular GIP poster currently on active duty is the dumbest?
  • Popular answer: All of them (6 pts)
  • Runner up: Mustang (3 pts)
11. Does kneeling during the national anthem insult your service to this great country?
  • Popular answer: No (9 pts)
  • Runner up: N/A
12. What's the highest rank (any nationality) of anyone who has posted in GIP?
  • Popular answer: O-6 (4 pts)
  • Runner up: N/A
13. Which US-involved war was/is the coolest?
  • Popular answer: WWII (5 pts)
  • Runner up: Civil War (2 pts)
14. What will ultimately cause the demise of the United States?
  • Popular answer: Nuclear weapons (3 pts)
  • Runner up: Hubris (2 pts)
15. What is the best dog in GIP?
  • Popular answer: All of them (8 pts)
  • Runner up: :(

Zeris fucked around with this message at 19:44 on Feb 7, 2018

mods changed my name
Oct 30, 2017


Lol at mustang

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

What, Me Worry?


I think I know the runner up for 15 and now I'm sad

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers







Hey I said Sherman for patron saint why wasn't my vote counted

VOTER SUPPRESSION

mods changed my name
Oct 30, 2017


Slavic Crime Yacht posted:

Hey I said Sherman for patron saint why wasn't my vote counted

VOTER SUPPRESSION

My understanding is that it only counts if multiple people say the same thing

Naked Bear
Apr 15, 2007

Boners was recorded before a studio audience that was alive!


Oh, no, I answered "best political party." :negative:

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers







mods change my name posted:

My understanding is that it only counts if multiple people say the same thing

Well...

Only registered members can see post attachments!

Zeris
Apr 15, 2003

Quality posting direct from my brain to your face holes.

Ok it was a good one:

Deathy McDeath came in first and is an all-American with 73 points.

He gets to choose the fate of his Russian foe, terrible robot, with 70 points, who is clearly a spy attempting to influence the forums.

Deathy notably was the first to submit answers to the challenge, so it's a little strange...


Notable as well - overall loser and bad poster UP THE BUM NO BABY aka Pesticide bottomed out with a shameful 33 points, the least of any contender.

mods changed my name
Oct 30, 2017


eat shti PISSticide

UP THE BUM NO BABY
Sep 1, 2011

by Hand Knit


RIP me

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers







mods change my name posted:

eat shti PISSticide

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

What, Me Worry?


I didn't play so obviously I couldn't be the Russian :chord:

Naked Bear
Apr 15, 2007

Boners was recorded before a studio audience that was alive!


EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:

I didn't play so obviously I couldn't be the Russian :chord:
Nork spotted.

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

What, Me Worry?


Naked Bear posted:

Nork spotted.

anybody seen any coooooooooooooooooodes

Smiling Jack
Dec 2, 2001

I sucked a dick for bus fare and then I walked home.



EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:

I didn't play so obviously I couldn't be the Russian :chord:

Time Crisis Actor
Apr 28, 2002


I sexually identify as a fat tinder girl,

Yeah lemme just clean my pannus first.

These candles smell amazing btw


Zeris posted:

Ok it was a good one:

Deathy McDeath came in first and is an all-American with 73 points.

He gets to choose the fate of his Russian foe, terrible robot, with 70 points, who is clearly a spy attempting to influence the forums.

Deathy notably was the first to submit answers to the challenge, so it's a little strange...


Notable as well - overall loser and bad poster UP THE BUM NO BABY aka Pesticide bottomed out with a shameful 33 points, the least of any contender.

I request permission to issue a MOD CHALLENGE, with all the penalties associated with it.

maffew buildings
Apr 29, 2009

I'm too dumb to get probated


Any way we can get a quick hits or best of spread on responses so we can laugh and regale in how we all have donkey brains?

Zeris
Apr 15, 2003

Quality posting direct from my brain to your face holes.

maffew buildings posted:

Any way we can get a quick hits or best of spread on responses so we can laugh and regale in how we all have donkey brains?

Some of you had a really time giving straight answers

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers







My name's not there wtf yo

Zeris
Apr 15, 2003

Quality posting direct from my brain to your face holes.

Slavic Crime Yacht posted:

My name's not there wtf yo

You didn't enter

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers







Zeris posted:

You didn't enter

I emailed you twice dude... junk mail?

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers







Pasted here for your reading pleasure

1. Who is the best pre-Trump US President? B-Rock The Islamic Shock Superallah Hussein Obama
2. What is the worst political party in the history (or present) of the United States? The Confederacy
3. How many current members of congress (on 1/15/2018) are military veterans?  All of them, they're all retarded
4. Is the United States Marine Corps its own branch of service, or a part of the Navy?   A spy WOULD want to know that, wouldn't they?
5. How many editions of the dick art book have been published?  2 and if you don't own one suck my dick you fuckman
6. Who is the patron saint of GIP?  General William Tecumseh Sherman, the burningest man in history
7. Which MRE makes you poo poo you pants?  Never eaten one.
8. Who is the collectively most hated mod of GIP?  Obvious answer is Grover, but I'm going with Hagetaka
9. What year did GIP become its own subforum?   2007 maybe?
10. Which regular GIP poster currently on active duty is the dumbest?    Mustang
11. Does kneeling during the national anthem insult your service to this great country?    I didn't serve, suck my dick
12. What's the highest rank (any nationality) of anyone who has posted in GIP?   Probably FrozenVent since he's qualified as a 4 stripe. If merchant navy doesn't count, I'd think manmythlegend, I believe he was a Commander.
13. Which US-involved war was/is the coolest?  Civil War, see my answer to patron saint.
14. What will ultimately cause the demise of the United States?    A lack of Sherman
15. What is the best dog in GIP?    Louis, gently caress you if you say otherwise



Love from Two Finger

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Zeris
Apr 15, 2003

Quality posting direct from my brain to your face holes.

Oh I didn't count yours because you didn't follow the rules

  • Locked thread