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OMGVBFLOL
Dec 20, 2003


i probably have some peter pan extended adolesence poo poo going on, but like, for being a weirdo gothy kid. anyway heres the thread fpr making GBS threads on valentines day



and also probably for bragging about your current romantic relationship because obviously that’s going to happen

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OWLS!
Sep 17, 2009


Goth

myDad
Jan 20, 2010

ce n'est pas ma mère

College Slice

Wish i wuz getting some 2 day

ArbitraryC
Jan 28, 2009



Pillbug

What's with the billion social media articles instructing women how to treat their V on Vday. Surely the perpetually single audience of these salon fluff pieces have already gotten pretty good at pleasuring themselves in their lonely 30 years on earth.

Edgar
Sep 9, 2005

Oh my heck!

Toilet Rascal

Just had an awkward conversation with my girlfriend. She called me up telling me how much she loves me and how her office is going nuts over the gift I sent her. A singing valentine telegram..... Boy did her tone changed when I told her I didn't send it lol

Pelosi de Bundi
Dec 29, 2006



Edgar posted:

Just had an awkward conversation with my girlfriend. She called me up telling me how much she loves me and how her office is going nuts over the gift I sent her. A singing valentine telegram..... Boy did her tone changed when I told her I didn't send it lol

you done GOOFED

Pawn 17
Dec 17, 2000

expect attention, newbie


Edgar posted:

Just had an awkward conversation with my girlfriend. She called me up telling me how much she loves me and how her office is going nuts over the gift I sent her. A singing valentine telegram..... Boy did her tone changed when I told her I didn't send it lol

You mean how you DID send it, and you love her much more than that guy she is loving on the side.

Spinster
Jul 15, 2017

Madre di GBS


Send your girlfriends this for guaranteed sexy times.

Only registered members can see post attachments!

a mysterious cloak
Apr 5, 2003

Leave me alone, dad, I'm with my friends!


Edgar posted:

Just had an awkward conversation with my girlfriend. She called me up telling me how much she loves me and how her office is going nuts over the gift I sent her. A singing valentine telegram..... Boy did her tone changed when I told her I didn't send it lol

She's getting slammed by her boss at this very moment

Edgar
Sep 9, 2005

Oh my heck!

Toilet Rascal

MAMA MIA!!

Pelosi de Bundi
Dec 29, 2006



we shouldn'tjest, on this holiest of days, brought to us by Saint Valentine

temple
Jul 29, 2006



i was miserable every valentines with or without valentine

Cough Drop The Beat
Jan 22, 2012

It's your HPV, Veronica. I'm just carrying it.

ArbitraryC posted:

What's with the billion social media articles instructing women how to treat their V on Vday. Surely the perpetually single audience of these salon fluff pieces have already gotten pretty good at pleasuring themselves in their lonely 30 years on earth.

You would be surprised how many people, guys and girls alike, are extremely bad at masturbating well. So many people don't really understand their genitals, especially with how awful sex education is in America.

Pawn 17
Dec 17, 2000

expect attention, newbie


Cough Drop The Beat posted:

You would be surprised how many people, guys and girls alike, are extremely bad at masturbating well. So many people don't really understand their genitals, especially with how awful sex education is in America.

What is this thing between my legs and why did it not come with a detailed instruction manual?

Extra Large Marge
Jan 21, 2004

third place is still pretty damn good


Fun Shoe

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

You would be surprised how many people, guys and girls alike, are extremely bad at masturbating well. So many people don't really understand their genitals, especially with how awful sex education is in America.

If you jack off in America, Jesus will put a hex on you.

myDad
Jan 20, 2010

ce n'est pas ma mère

College Slice

Don’t tell anyone I’m jacking off

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014



i have the day off work and about to go on a huge bike ride...and im wearing all black lol

gonna JO later though

flirty dental hygienist
Jul 24, 2007

All aboard the knuckle train to FIST PLANET!!


I'm 42 and I wear black every day. It's not a phase mom

my underwear is red today though

Moon Atari
Dec 26, 2010



Canned Ferret

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

You would be surprised how many people, guys and girls alike, are extremely bad at masturbating well. So many people don't really understand their genitals, especially with how awful sex education is in America.

My masturbation coach says I'm a natural..

bradzilla
Oct 15, 2004

it's good And Messy...


Plaster Town Cop

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

You would be surprised how many people, guys and girls alike, are extremely bad at masturbating well. So many people don't really understand their genitals, especially with how awful sex education is in America.

tug or rub genital until cum

Laslow
Jul 18, 2007



Forget about choosing what to wear, I have to make real important decisions on Valentines Day, like to whether to take Cialis or Viagra and then choosing the correct combo of pain killers and muscle relaxers to have ready to go immediately after.

Kuato
Feb 25, 2005

COMFY FLEECE SWEATERS ALT ACCOUNT

Buglord

I like to think black is thinning but I’m just some fat guy wearing black instead of a different color

Cough Drop The Beat
Jan 22, 2012

It's your HPV, Veronica. I'm just carrying it.

Three Olives posted:

One of my friend's partner said it is valentines and birthday month and has been sending him a gift and work every day this month. Love is gross.

This is actually really cute!

Cough Drop The Beat fucked around with this message at Feb 14, 2018 around 18:18

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005



One of my friend's partner said it is valentines and birthday month and has been sending him a gift and work every day this month. Love is gross.

Fishy Joe
Apr 19, 2005
Eat at Fishy Joe's

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

I had a girlfriend like 5 years ago who confessed to me that she was mortified of touching her vagina and would only masturbate using pillows or stuffed animals.

She was 22.

What kind of animals we talkin

Pelosi de Bundi
Dec 29, 2006



Three Olives posted:

One of my friend's partner said it is valentines and birthday month and has been sending him a gift and work every day this month. Love is gross.

that's actually sweet!

Stevie Lee
Oct 8, 2007
Chief Rocka

Three Olives posted:

One of my friend's partner said it is valentines and birthday month and has been sending him a gift and work every day this month. Love is gross.

disgusting

e: I'm gonna be the guy at Walgreens picking out a gift at 9:30 tonight

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005



A friend of mine is single and a girlfriend of his asked him out for lunch for Palintines day and I felt really sad for him.

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005



Pelosi de Bundi posted:

that's actually sweet!

No, it is ridiculously over the top and sets unreasonable expectations. My friend is actually upset about it but afraid to say anything.

I Brake For MILFs
Jan 9, 2007



I'm single for the first time in 5 years on Valentine's. This is cool. Just sitting around reading GBS smoking menthols.


Might get some food later, who knows?

Moon Atari
Dec 26, 2010



Canned Ferret

Do people really send gifts to their partner's work? I've heard people reference it multiple times online and it seems very weird to me, like romance is a performance for an audience of coworkers, or like they are using it as an opportunity to establish to the coworkers that their partner is very much taken.

Conch Shell Corp
Feb 24, 2009



Im giving my girlfriend a half used cigar and a box of After Eight Dinner Mints. She gives me a slap across the face and spits in my eye. it's our tradition

myDad
Jan 20, 2010

ce n'est pas ma mère

College Slice

Vastarien
Dec 20, 2012

Where I live is nightmare, thus a certain nonchalance.


Buglord

I wear black on the outside
'Cause black is how I feeeel on the inside

A Fancy Hat
Nov 18, 2016


I was single on Valentine's Day every year in college and it was amazing at the time. Every bar was packed with other lonely single people, so it was way more socially acceptable to get drunk and awkwardly try and hit on people.

Nothing will ever beat the year I successfully had two roommates interested in me, then proceeded to completely ruin my chances with both of them (and what was almost definitely going to be a sloppy, sad threesome) by going on a drunken tangent about this dog I saw in the park a few days earlier. To be fair, it was a cool dog.

Cough Drop The Beat
Jan 22, 2012

It's your HPV, Veronica. I'm just carrying it.

Fishy Joe posted:

What kind of animals we talkin

It's been a long while but she had an assortment of typical bears, a tiger, and a stuffed Lapras in her room.

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005



Moon Atari posted:

Do people really send gifts to their partner's work? I've heard people reference it multiple times online and it seems very weird to me, like romance is a performance for an audience of coworkers, or like they are using it as an opportunity to establish to the coworkers that their partner is very much taken.

A lot of women get really obsessed with everyone else's relationships at work as just office gossip. My partner says a gaggle of women that he works with bring it up everytime he mentions me on Facebook even in passing like tags me at a bar or something like it's some brand new whirlwind romance. Uh, we have been together a while, we live together, we go out to bars on the weekend because we don't have ugly children at home.

stuxracer
May 4, 2006


Moon Atari posted:

using it as an opportunity to establish to the coworkers that their partner is very much taken.
its this

Cough Drop The Beat
Jan 22, 2012

It's your HPV, Veronica. I'm just carrying it.

Moon Atari posted:

Do people really send gifts to their partner's work? I've heard people reference it multiple times online and it seems very weird to me, like romance is a performance for an audience of coworkers, or like they are using it as an opportunity to establish to the coworkers that their partner is very much taken.

Nah. It's just as simple as your partner spends most of their day at work on Valentine's Day or any day and it's nice to show them you care. It's cute. Stop overthinking it.

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Laslow
Jul 18, 2007



It's also cheaper just to have sex with them AFTER their morning shower so the go to work smelling like your acrid morning nut.

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